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Connected Parenting

Author: Jennifer Kolari

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Connected Parenting shares techniques that therapists use to help parents soothe their child as well as enhance the parent-child bond and is based on the understanding that correcting and guiding behavior works best when it is preceded by and linked to empathy. At the heart of this parenting model is the CALM Technique which helps parents accurately attune to children’s affect and experience. These empathic interactions release reward chemicals in the brain that stimulate positive emotions and increase order and balance in the nervous system. Reward chemicals, including natural opiates, endorphins, and a powerful hormone called oxytocin, reduce and inhibit stress hormones and bathe the brain in positive emotions that ripple through every cell in the body. The benefits of empathy and compassion have a strong base in science that cannot be underestimated. Simply put, it is brain food, the emotional nutrition all of us need, perhaps our children most of all.
Although many parenting techniques stress the importance of empathy, Connected Parenting will show you how to use it skillfully to repair frayed bonds, deescalate tantrums, contain and correct difficult behaviors and help your child to become more confident and emotionally resilient. We use a collaborative and supportive coaching model and provide inspirational, easy-to-understand techniques grounded in neuroscience and attachment. In the end, your child will be more compliant, more relaxed, and – most importantly – happier. Connected Parenting will bring out the best in you and your child.
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Get ready for an exhilarating journey today as we launch into our first-ever interview series that will take us through the awe-inspiring lives of phenomenal individuals with powerful stories, wisdom to share, and tips to elevate our lives – and parenting game! It is with immense pleasure that I welcome our first guest and real-life superhero, my good friend, Jimmy May. A retired Navy SEAL Commander with 22 years of unparalleled courage and leadership under his belt, our conversation with Jimmy promises to be nothing short of phenomenal! So buckle up, and let's dive in! Jennifer Takeaways: How To Help An Energetic Child (8:43) Dad's Passing (11:44) Potential & Greatness In A Tiny Body (17:46) The Navy (19:59) Gratitude For Seal Team's Support (26:33) The Difference Between Toxic & Healthy Shame (35:38) Beyond The Brotherhood (39:19) Meet Jimmy Jimmy is an active duty Navy SEAL Commander with 22 years of service. He developed and teaches curriculums on combat leadership to all SEAL Chiefs and OICs and Combat Ethics to the Naval Special Warfare Community and the Navy JAG community. Commander May has seven deployments to the middle east and has an array of awards including 3 Bronze Stars and the Purple Heart. He has experience working across the globe in high-stakes situations to find common ground across a wide array of conflict scenarios. He completed his undergraduate work at Texas and post-graduation studies at Harvard as an alumni of the Program for Leadership Development. Jimmy is CEO of Sushi Assassin, an in-home sushi catering business for private events and recently started Mayday Executive Services to help companies develop camaraderie and unit cohesion through shared intense experiences. He serves as CEO and a board member of Beyond the Brotherhood, a non-profit organization dedicated to helping Navy SEALS of character transition from the Teams to the civilian sector and is sought after as a keynote speaker for events across a wide variety of organizations. Jimmy is fluent in Arabic, an avid spear fisherman, surfer, martial artist and amateur bee-keeper. He resides in Ocean Beach, San Diego with his family and prides himself on doing good things for good people. Connect with Jimmy: Website: https://www.beyondthebrotherhood.org/about/
As a parent of teens, you might be familiar with what I like to call the dreaded "screaming hair fit," caused by everything from finding the perfect outfit before an important event, a haircut gone wrong or even just a pimple on their face. Transition times with teens can be especially turbulent; and leave you feeling pulled you into their emotional "vortex" with no way to get yourself out of it. If this sounds familiar join me for today's discussion where I'll look closer at why this phenomenon occurs and explore strategies for navigating these emotionally charged situations with your teenager - plus learn what age range is more likely to experience improvement in such frustrating scenarios. Join me now as I dissect the teenage screaming hair fit.
In today’s Q&A episode, I am answering two powerful parenting questions about teens who are anxious, withdrawn, or pushing parents away.Exploring how to support a 14-year-old who feels intense anxiety entering stores or public places, and why this “spotlight stage” is such a normal part of teen development. Listen in to hear me share how tools like the CALM Technique, predictability, rehearsal, and sensory anchors can reduce anticipatory fear and help anxious teens feel more regulated.We then look at how to communicate with a 15-year-old who shuts down or becomes easily irritated, and why teens often push away the feeling of being small rather than the parent themselves. I offer practical strategies like side-door conversations, low-pressure moments of connection, a warm neutral tone, and the 5:2 ratio to keep communication open and relationship-focused.This episode is a reassuring guide for any parent navigating anxious teens, withdrawn teens, or the normal developmental challenges of adolescence reminding you that connection and co-regulation are the bridge back to closeness.Jennifer's Takeaways:Q&A on Helping a 14-Year-Old with Anxiety (00:01)Strategies for Managing Anxiety in Public Places (04:46)Connecting with Teenagers: Side Door Conversations (09:05)Building Connection Through Proximity and Moments (15:13)Resources and Final Thoughts (18:12)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).
Phones and AI aren’t going anywhere, so the goal isn’t to ban them, but to help our kids integrate them wisely. In this episode, we’ll explore how constant connectivity impacts a child’s ability to focus, plan, regulate emotions, and problem-solve. We’ll look at why kids and teens are especially vulnerable to the “instant relief” loop that phones provide, and how AI can both support and hinder their growing brains.Most importantly, we’ll talk about what parents can do: how to set boundaries that actually stick, how to preserve core executive functioning skills, and how to help your child build the resilience they’ll need in a world where technology is always within reach.Jennifer's Takeaways:Impact of Cell Phones and AI on Kids' Focus and Problem-Solving Skills (00:00)Challenges of Multitasking with Multiple Screens (02:46)Balancing AI Use with Critical Thinking Skills (03:50)The Role of Boredom in Developing Creativity (05:47)Teaching Kids to Use AI as a Coach, Not a Crutch (07:05)The Future of AI in Education and Parenting (08:09)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).
One of the hardest moments for parents is when the child who used to tell you everything, who they sat with at lunch, who their friends were, what made them laugh suddenly starts saying less. The silence can feel alarming. Many parents immediately wonder: Are they hiding something? Did I do something wrong? Are they okay?But what if the quiet isn’t rejection? What if it’s part of growing up and becoming themselves?In this episode, we explore the difference between privacy and secrecy, how to recognize each, and why understanding this distinction can completely transform your relationship with your tween or teen. You’ll learn how to stay connected without crowding them, support their independence without losing emotional closeness, and navigate the shift from childlike openness to adolescent boundaries with more confidence and less fear.Jennifer's Takeaways:Understanding the Difference Between Privacy and Secrecy (00:00)The Role of Privacy in Teen Development (02:51)Balancing Parental Reactions and Teen Privacy (03:15)Handling Secrets and Alignment in Teens (05:28)Practical Tips for Parents on Managing Privacy (07:22)The Importance of Connection in Parenting (09:33)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).
When your child’s emotions, reactions, and struggles all feel bigger than you can handle, it can be exhausting. But there’s one thing that truly changes everything: connection.In this episode, we’ll explore how deep, genuine connection helps regulate a child’s nervous system, reduces explosive moments, and strengthens emotional safety. Because when kids feel seen, understood, and safe, even their most intense storms begin to settle.Jennifer's Takeaways:Understanding ADHD and Its Impact on Parenting (00:00)The Role of Skills vs. Medication in ADHD Management (02:44)Applying the Calm Technique for ADHD Kids (04:39)Handling Doom Piles and Overwhelm (07:49)Reframing ADHD Strengths and Balancing Empathy with Limits (14:27)The Importance of Connection and Regulation in Parenting (16:48)Medication and Its Role in ADHD Management (19:12)Conclusion and Resources for Parents (22:32)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).
Even the closest families move through seasons of connection. There are times when everyone feels in sync, laughing easily, sharing space, and understanding each other without words. And then there are moments when it feels like you’re speaking different languages, missing each other’s cues, or simply running on separate frequencies.In this episode, we’ll explore why those quieter or more distant seasons happen and how to keep your family’s love steady through them. You’ll learn what causes those natural fluctuations in closeness, how to recognize when it’s just a temporary rhythm versus something deeper, and practical ways to reconnect with calm and compassion.Because real closeness isn’t about being perfectly attuned all the time, it’s about staying anchored in love, even when connection feels thin.Jennifer's Takeaways:Family Closeness and Relationship Dynamics (00:00)Understanding and Managing Emotional Reactions (03:31)Self-Reflection and Identifying Personal Triggers (07:27)The Power of Interpretation and Control in Relationships (08:28)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).
Boredom, it’s uncomfortable, it’s annoying, and it often sends us scrambling for solutions. But what if boredom isn’t something to fix… what if it’s actually something to embrace?In this episode, we’ll explore why boredom isn’t the enemy. In fact, it’s one of the most valuable emotional states for children. Boredom helps develop creativity, problem-solving, and emotional resilience, all essential skills for healthy development.In this week's episode you’ll learn how to shift your perspective, handle your own discomfort when your child complains, and create the space for boredom to do what it’s meant to: spark imagination and inner resourcefulness.Jennifer's Takeaways:Understanding the Importance of Boredom (00:00)The Role of Boredom in Child Development (02:03)Imagination and Boredom in Adolescents (04:05)Handling Boredom in Children (07:18)Strategies for Managing Boredom (08:38)Practical Tips for Parents (11:59)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).
Every family has its own rhythm. Some love cooking together, some bond over board games and some, believe it or not, enjoy arguing for fun. To them, debating ideas and challenging each other isn’t conflict; it’s connection.But what feels like playful banter to one person can feel like chaos, criticism, or even emotional danger to another. So how do you know when spirited debate crosses the line? And how do you create a home where everyone feels heard and safe, whether they love to spar or prefer peace and quiet?In this episode, we’ll explore why some families naturally fall into patterns of “recreational arguing,” what emotional needs this dynamic can meet, and how to find the right balance between healthy expression and emotional safety.Jennifer's Takeaways:Recreational Arguing in Families (00:00)Neuroscience Behind Recreational Arguing (01:43)Balancing Fun Debates with Emotional Safety (03:39)Teaching Kids Awareness and Respect (06:00)Managing Intense Family Interactions (07:38)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).
Have you ever looked down at your phone to find a flood of messages, ten, twenty, even thirty texts from your child all in a row? Sometimes it’s about something small, like wanting a snack or permission for a new game. Other times, it’s a full emotional storm, with your child texting in distress, upset, or desperate for reassurance.It can feel overwhelming. You’re torn between exhaustion and worry; afraid to miss an important message, but frustrated by the constant notifications.In this episode, we’ll unpack why kids do this, what emotional and neurological factors might be driving the behavior, and how to respond with calm, clarity, and love. You’ll learn practical ways to set healthy boundaries while helping your child build emotional regulation and resilience.Jennifer's Takeaways:Understanding the Problem of Constant Texting from Kids (00:00)Factors Contributing to Kids' Urgent Texting (01:28)Behavioral and Neurological Aspects of Urgent Texting (03:36)Parental Reactions and Emotional Triggers (06:03)Strategies for Managing Kids' Urgent Texting (07:17)Practical Tips for Teaching Kids to Wait (09:42)Reflecting on Personal Triggers and Modeling Calm (13:37)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).
The world feels heavy right now. With so much change, uncertainty, and difficult news, it’s natural for both parents and children to feel stressed, anxious, or even scared. But our kids are watching how we respond, and they need our calm, grounded guidance more than ever.In this episode, I share practical ways to talk to your children about what’s happening in the world without increasing fear or confusion. You’ll learn how to help them process big emotions, what language to use based on their age, and how to model emotional regulation even when you don’t have all the answers.Jennifer's Takeaways:Handling Stress and News in Parenting (00:00)Simplifying Information for Young Children (04:03)Promoting Empathy and Reassurance (05:10)Open Discussions with Teenagers (06:48)Self-Care and Modeling for Children (10:41)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).
It can be tempting to step in and “just do it” when your child struggles, whether it’s opening a tricky package, making a sandwich that keeps falling apart, or facing the frustration of trying something new. But every time we take over, we unintentionally miss a chance to build their confidence and problem-solving skills.Today, I’ll share practical ways to reinforce independence while staying calm and connected. You’ll learn how to support your child through the frustration without rescuing, and how to balance encouragement with connection so they gain skills and emotional resilience.Helping kids become more independent doesn’t just teach them to do things on their own, it teaches them that they can try, fail, and succeed while knowing you’re there to support them.Jennifer's Takeaways:Encouraging Independence in Children (00:00)Understanding Personal Responses (02:38)Supportive Techniques for Independence (04:35)Encouraging Phrases and Micro Boundaries (06:45)Personalized Approaches and Long-term Practice (10:15)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).
Watching your child be excluded, targeted, or hurt is devastating. You want to protect them, but you also don’t want to make things worse. Many parents would gladly take their child’s place just to spare them the pain.In this episode, I’ll help you better understand what bullying is, and what it isn’t. We’ll look at the difference between bullying and social aggression, how bullying shows up differently in boys and girls, and what steps you can take to support your child if you think they’re being bullied.You’ll also learn when it’s time to step in and advocate on their behalf, and how to take care of yourself in the process, because this experience impacts parents deeply too. And if you’ve ever dealt with socially aggressive adults in your own life, these insights may support you as well.Jennifer's Takeaways:Understanding Bullying and Social Aggression (00:00)Differences Between Boys and Girls in Bullying (06:22)Recognizing and Addressing Bullying (21:17)Strategies for Parents to Support Their Children (22:40)The Importance of Empathy and Connection (22:56)Role of Schools and Advocacy (23:10)Long-Term Effects of Bullying (29:30)Supporting Children with Social Skills (30:01)The Role of Empowerment and Accountability (33:46)Balancing Empowerment and Support (34:30)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).
Venting can be powerful, it helps us release stress, feel heard, and connect with the people we love. When done well, it’s a healthy way to process emotions. But here’s the catch: venting can also become addictive. Instead of calming us down, it can spiral into drama, negativity, or constant complaining.In this episode, we’ll explore how to guide your kids, and your whole family, in using venting as a healthy tool instead of a destructive habit. You’ll learn how to create safe, supportive “venting sessions,” what signs to watch for when things start going off track, and strategies to keep the focus on connection rather than conflict.Venting doesn’t have to create chaos. With the right approach, it can bring your family closer and teach your kids lifelong emotional regulation skills.Jennifer's Takeaways:Venting: Its Importance and Potential Pitfalls (00:00)Mirroring as a Healthy Venting Technique (02:36)Addressing Underlying Issues and Modeling Appropriate Behavior (10:45)Setting Boundaries and Promoting Respect (11:08)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).
Today’s conversation comes straight from our Q&A series, where I answer real questions from listeners.Andrea wrote in to share about an ongoing struggle with her 10-year-old daughter. She describes her as a “gladiator,” strong-willed, demanding, and often wanting everything her way. These traits can make family events stressful, sometimes leading to meltdowns and blow-ups that derail the day.With a trip to the theme park on the horizon, Andrea wanted to know: How do you prepare and set things up so the whole family has a better experience, even with a gladiator child on board?In this episode, I’ll share practical strategies to help you set expectations ahead of time, manage transitions during the day, and create a plan that supports both your gladiator and the rest of the family. Because yes, family trips don’t have to be a battle. With a few intentional steps, you can help your gladiator child feel more grounded while protecting the joy of the day for everyone.Jennifer's Takeaways:Introduction to the Episode and Andrea's Question (00:00)Understanding Neuro Spicy Kids and Their Behavior (01:38)Managing Expectations and Pre-Planning (02:52)Divide and Conquer Strategy (05:23)Handling Overwhelm and Making Choices (07:59)Dealing with Tantrums and Leaving Early (11:43)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).
Hello connected parents, and welcome back to another episode of Connected Parenting. In today’s conversation, we’re tackling the back-to-school transition.For many kids, change can feel overwhelming.Shifting from the relaxed rhythms of home or summer into the structure of school can bring up resistance, anxiety, and even meltdowns. As parents, that can feel like a rollercoaster of emotions for us too.In this episode, I’ll walk you through practical tips and insights to help your child ease into the school routine with less stress and more confidence. We’ll cover ways to prepare them for what’s ahead, strategies to manage overwhelm, and how you can support yourself through the process as well.By the end, you’ll have a toolkit of ideas to make the back-to-school transition smoother and set the stage for a positive year ahead.Jennifer's Takeaways:Back to School Transition Challenges (00:00)Managing Time and Bedtime Adjustments (03:07)Celebrating Summer and Preparing for School (04:44)Handling Emotions and Transitions (08:17)Maintaining Routines and Handling Challenges (09:25)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).
Special occasions, whether they’re weddings, birthdays, holiday gatherings, or family reunions can be joyful, memorable, and deeply meaningful. But for parents of children who are highly sensitive, anxious, or strong-willed “Gladiators,” these events can also bring big challenges.In this episode replay of Connected Parenting, Jennifer Kolari, shares 10 practical strategies to help your child (and you) navigate these moments with more ease.From preparing ahead of time and setting realistic expectations, to knowing when to step away and how to stay calm under pressure, Jennifer offers tools that will make family celebrations less stressful and more enjoyable.Let's face it, big events will never be stress-free, but with these strategies you can turn them into opportunities for connection and lasting family memories.Jennifer's Takeaways:Impact of Parental Energy on Children (02:18)Managing Event Schedules and Expectations (03:22)Consistent Parenting Across Settings (05:23)Taking Breaks and Sharing Responsibility (07:16)Leaving Before a Meltdown (09:00)Preparing Children for Events (10:28)Ensuring Proper Nutrition (11:03)Ensuring Adequate Rest (12:06)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).
In this very special episode of Connected Parenting, I sit down with my youngest daughter, Olivia my true “gladiator child.” Fierce, sensitive, musical, and deeply thoughtful, Olivia has always had a strong counterwill and a fire that pushed me as a parent in all the best (and hardest!) ways.Parents often ask me, “What will my gladiator child be like when they’re older?” In this conversation, Olivia shares openly about what it felt like to be that child the eight-year-old who struggled, the teen learning to navigate big feelings, and the young adult she is now.If you’ve ever worried about what the future holds for your strong-willed child, this episode will give you hope, perspective, and connection.Jennifer's Takeaways:Olivia's Experience as a Gladiator Child (03:55)Challenges of Parenting a Gladiator Child (05:57)Integration and Growth of a Gladiator Child (07:51)Advice for Parents of Gladiator Children (10:04)Strategies for Managing Gladiator Child Behavior (14:23)Impact of Gladiator Child Behavior on Parents (15:11)Olivia's Role as a Kids Club Counselor (23:39)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).
In this episode of Connected Parenting, we flip the script on a common parenting concern; texting.While we often hear about the downsides of screens, social media, and endless scrolling, texting can actually be a powerful connection tool between you and your teen.I’ll share why, in certain moments, a text might be the bridge that keeps communication open, helps your teen feel seen and understood, and even diffuses tension before it escalates. From using texts to check in during their busy day to sending a quick message that shows you’re thinking of them, I’ll walk you through the situations where texting shines and how to use it effectively without replacing meaningful face-to-face conversations.If you’ve ever worried about “too much screen time” but also want to strengthen your bond with your teen, this episode will give you a fresh perspective and practical tips to make texting work for your relationship instead of against it.Jennifer's Takeaways:Benefits of Texting Your Teen (00:00)Using Texting for Specific Tasks (02:09)Texting for Connection and Affirmation (05:07)Overcoming Texting Challenges (07:26)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).
Every parent wants their child to feel confident, connected, and well-liked but social health isn’t just about having friends. It’s a protective factor that influences everything from mental health to academic success.Whether your child is struggling socially or is already a natural leader, this episode is packed with tools, scripts, and mindset shifts to help you parent with connection and raise a child who chooses authenticity over popularity.Let’s build the foundation for confident, emotionally resilient kids who lead with kindness.Jennifer's Takeaways:Helping Children Become Leaders, Not Followers (00:00)Modeling Empathy and Integrity (03:14)Teaching Children to Navigate Social Situations (07:58)The Role of Parents in Improving Social Skills (09:24)Incorporating Empathy into Family Values (11:39)Meet Jennifer KolariJennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).
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Comments (1)

Estelle

I just had to comment to say this is the most practical parenting podcast I've heard with regards to approachable strategies I can use right now to help with emotional regulation. thank you.

Jan 6th
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