Dam Parenting

In this episode, Elizabeth- an award winning librarian, author and mother - joins Eva and Maren as they review the book - The Happiest Kids in the World, bringing up children the Dutch way. This book is only available in OBA in Dutch! So listen in to this episode and get the insights from three different mothers as they break it down and give their own take aways.

Back towards the start of the podcast in late 2023, on episode 15 we spoke with Harriet, a postpartum doula in Amsterdam to give us her insights for mothers to be. We had discussed preparing for birth, insights she had learned through her clients, but also we learned Harriet herself would be welcoming her first child in early 2024. On this episode, we speak with Harriet at the crucial 3 month mark, when hormones drop, when reality has well and truly set in, after the initial joys and well wishes and family travelling over to meet the newborn. Harriet unveils her experience, her truths and we believe many mothers will feel seen listening to this. You can follow Harriet on her instagram here

Food important

Overwhelm is an expected feeling in motherhood- but what about if we needed more than just understanding. what if we need more. It's well documented that girls are diagnosed later than boys, and lately there is a surge in numbers of women in their 30's and 40's being diagnosed. Today, Emma, the ADHD Potential coach, joins us to discuss ADHD in motherhood, and provides us some tips on how to manage ourselves. Routine is core, but setting realistic expectations is also crucial for our mindset. It feels like we can all diagnosed ourselves with ADHD or ADD or another neurodiverse label - but today's episode will benefit every listener with some great insights from a professional.

For all of us who have experienced it, for those lucky not to have, but may know someone, this episode is a heartfelt discussion about the process it can take, the impact it can have and also the support that we can provide - to those who may be experiencing it - or may have already. This topic is rarely discussed, but the Maternal Mental Health series felt like a great space to be able to open up this conversation and, with thanks to Ilena Standring, who supports mothers in all aspects of pregnancy, birthing and beyond, we hope listeners might want us to come back to discuss this topic further from certain angles that are rarely spoken about. Ilena spoke about the article she wrote previously for Amsterdam Mamas which you can find here

This episode stems from an email we received from Erin, a relocation counsellor, coach and consultant who had been listening to episode 30: School and Languages. Erin wanted to take up where Eva had mentioned about the anxiety of her daughter starting school and all that it entails, and discuss the impact that these moments we care so deeply for our little ones about - really we also need to think about it for ourselves also. We too, need to be self compassionate, giving ourself time and grace to experience what is going on and not just keep the hamster wheel spinning. Let's talk about it.

It can be lonely No- it IS lonely. No matter how much help you can have, friends, family even around you. The truth is - you are the one at night, doing the feeds, the day time, parks, walks, sitting room floor, holding baby and who is holding you? On this episode, we really wanted to call it out - highlight this awful experience many mothers will go through. The loneliness of it all - when you feel you should be enjoying it, grateful, creating magical memories, being social, and well - a hanging out with your new mom friends. The truth is, it's dam lonely. Days we can't shower, get off the floor as we have been up all night, no energy to do anything. It's raining - don't want to get wet - It's sunny - don't want to show my face to crowds of happy vivacious youngsters enjoying their freedom. Maren and Eva sit down with Naomi to discuss this, and hope that, well know that, this will resonate with most listeners. If you want to read more about some research that Naomi had mentioned, please click on the links below As long as you are self- compassionate, you will never walk alone Self-compassion and loneliness

TW: NICU Story Everyone plans for their perfect birth - but the reality is, most of us will never get it. It's an ideal - thats all. The trutth is - we just want our babies to be healthy, that's all it comes down to. On today's episode, Toni, a well known doula in Amsterdam, shares her own birth story where she gives birth very early, how she and her partner coped, and how her daughter was a campion of the NICU ward. We are grateful for Toni sharing her story. If you or anyone you know might have gone through it, or are going through it - know that there are others out there just like you. We can support each other through our experiences, and knowledge. Links: If you would like to find out more about volunteering at the Ronald McDonald house - click here!

Going back to work is already a major leap, and change for us mothers - but what about those of us still breastfeeding/pumping. How can we manage continuing our journey with this? Mama Ruth is here to discuss the return to work side of feeding our babies, and to know what to prepare for, and what to expect.

In this episode, Angela from Every Mother Knows joins Eva and Maren to discuss a pivotal moment for many new mothers. Returning to work with your new title as mother can play a major impact on your confidence and identity. So let’s listen to hear more about our rights, how to manage this period of returning to work and hopefully give you an ounce of confidence back.

We can all get caught up in the rushes of getting ready for work, daycare, school, gym, dinners, cleaning up. When we are on this wheel of continually chasing ourselves, day after day, week after week and year and year - we can end up in a burnout. Katia joins Eva and Maren to discuss our mental health hygiene. Much like brushing our teeth, washing our hair, which we know to do as we can physically can see or feel t needs cleaning - Katia discusses simple techniques to take into our daily routine also - some just taking minutes. A few minutes in our whole day, can recalibrate our body - nervous system, emotions, and raise awareness to our somatic self. At the end of the episode, join in on a body scan to check how you are feeling.

Sleep when the baby sleeps - is just not a reality. Research shows that new parents lose significant sleep each night, with disruptions lasting until the oldest child is 6 years old. Sleep deprivation is a form of torture - and yet this is what all parents will go through with a child. Some feel their only option is to sleep train a baby, as thats what everyone else is doing. It's on socials, its on group chats, so it must be the way. I AM SO TIRED... On this episode, Dr. Naomi and Camille from 'Little baby go to sleep' join Maren and Eva to discuss the impact of sleep on the parents. Together, they start the conversation of parents taking a holistic look at the situation, understanding the reality of the situation and things to consider as new parents. Not everyone chooses to sleep train, many of us still hold our toddlers hands when they fall asleep. There is no right or wrong way to do things. This conversation is to highlight, like in DAMChats episode 10 The Bedtime Bond how everyone has their own approach and not to feel like you should be doing something you may feel is mainstream if you are not comfortable with it.

It's European Baby Wearing week ! Baby wearing has become so popular in the last decade - and with baby wearing not just frees up your hands -but also keeps your baby comforted being near a care giver. Feeling close, hearing heartbeat, or just at peace and relaxed. Zyanya, is well versed in baby carriers, and she joins Eva and Maren to discuss the benefits of baby wearing, for both baby and mother.

Let's talk about postpartum and how to help yourself in advance - not just the tangible items we are excited to go shopping for - but the support teams we can rely on. No matter how prepared you will be - you can never be fully prepared. So plan to be unprepared. Heather Berry, a postpartum support service provider in Amsterdam, highlights the reality of what you will go through, physically and emotionally - in the hopes that you will give yourself grace during this precious time and just to be present with your baby and also yourself. This is your motherhood. Let's take a moment to reflect on your support network - and start figuring out who can I add?

One aspect of the podcast was to also hear the voices of our own community. At the start of the year, Maren shared her own birth story. This can be a struggle for some - as many don't get exactly the birth plan we had in our mind -so these stories are to highlight what other moms have gone through, have pulled themselves through and are able to look back on years later. Today, we welcome Emma - a coach specialised in ADHD and advocate for women. Emma's story might not sound familiar to many, as some of us in Amsterdam believe we should be having the home birth - as that's whats been promoted (including our insurance sending us those kraampackets -incase it happens). After all it's not a medical procedure - right? Well, for some of us, past experiences, culture or otherwise, we may feel more comforted in a sterilised clinical setting. And today, Emma is going to share her birth story, and her reflections of the experiences. Would you like to share your own birth story? Drop us a message, we would be delighted to have you on!

Episode 2 - and this time today's guest is Professor Birit Broekman from the POP Polis clinic in OLVG (Amsterdam). It's estimated that two in ten pregnancy women and postpartum mothers has a psychiatric condition such as major depressive disorder, a panic disorder, postpartum psychosis or postpartum depression. OLVG has the POP outpatient clinic where experts from the fields of Psychiatry, Obstetrics and Paediatrics collaborate to provide a holisitic all rounded approach to help mothers and mothers to be. The teams involved Psychologist. Do you suffer from psychological complaints or do you have a mental illness? The psychologist will then guide you through this with the help of conversations and/or therapy. Psychiatrist. Are you taking medication during your pregnancy? A psychiatrist is then involved in the guidance. This can inform you about medication use during your pregnancy and possibly help you (temporarily) reduce it. Gynaecologist. A gynaecologist checks your physical health. They can also assess if there are any risks associated with your pregnancy. Paediatrician. The paediatrician can tell you what care your baby needs. Did you take antidepressants or anti-anxiety medications during pregnancy? They will then check whether this has had an influence on your baby's health. In this episode, Maren and Eva ask Prof Broekmans about the services available from the POP Polis to mothers in her own clinic. From prior to conception, through pregnancy and into postpartum - the clinic is providing essential support that everyone should be aware of should they feel they need more support on their journey into motherhood. Links: You can find a list of all POP Polis clinics in the Netherlands here

Chandelle is back - our midwife based in Amsterdam who was first on on episode 11 where she explained all about the midwife training and expectations. In this episode - Chandelle explains what is to be expected from our midwifes in the 6 weeks after giving birth and what women should take into consideration for their own mental health. Midwife's are paramount in our pregnancy, birthing and fourth trimester period - so having a good relationship with them is paramount. They are the individuals who will bear witness to our journey into matrescence. So ensuring we are taking care of ourselves, not just the physical, and nourishing way but also mental support - our midwifes can help us along our path into motherhood and beyond, feeling strong, capable and cared for.

Welcome to a special announcements episode! Dam Parenting launched just 6 months ago - and today marks 55th episode being released and there are lots to celebrate for our niche audience! ALSO Eva and Maren are thrilled to launch the DamParenting Maternal Mental Health Series for the entire month of May. With over 15 episodes crafted in collaboration with our local community, Dam Parenting aims to be a vital resource for our international family community living in the Netherlands. Navigating pregnancy, birthing, and parenthood can be a daunting journey filled with uncertainties, especially when language and cultural barriers come into play. Our special series is designed to provide the knowledge and support you deserve, eliminating the need for endless research, translation, and struggles alone. Join Maren and Eva as they kick off this transformative series on Wednesday 1st of May. Whether you're an expectant parent, a new mom or dad, or simply curious about the world of parenting, these episodes are tailored to resonate with you. Don't forget to subscribe to Dam Parenting on your favourite podcast platforms, follow us on Instagram, and share this invaluable resource with your community. Above all, we hope this series enlightens, empowers, and inspires you, shining a light on the dedicated community of service providers ready to support you on your parenting journey. Together, let's embrace the beauty and challenges of parenthood with confidence and grace!

In this insightful episode, Maren and Eva are joined again by Ilena Standring, a passionate doula and advocate and expert on matrescence—the journey of becoming a mother. Dana Raphael created the term matrescence in 1973. Matrescence is a profound transformation that encompasses physical, emotional, and psychological changes as women transition into motherhood - where in the last episode with Dr Naomi, together they spoke about the identity shift. Ilena will discuss the intricacies of this transformative process, shedding light on the joys, challenges, and complexities that come with it. From the shifting dynamics of relationships to the evolution of self-identity and the balancing act of motherhood, we explore the multifaceted aspects of matrescence. Ilena shares valuable perspectives, practical tips, and empowering insights to help navigate this transformative journey with grace and resilience. Whether you're a new mom, expecting mother, or someone interested in understanding the transformative power of motherhood, this episode offers a wealth of knowledge and understanding. Join Eva, Maren and Ilena as they break down matrescence and celebrate the incredible strength and beauty of the motherhood journey. You can find out more on Ilena on her instagram: Ilena_j_standring Be sure to share this within your community, mothers to be and mothers alike - we are all in this together. Being a parent is hard enough, doing it in another country without the support from our family and close friends is a tough journey many of us are trying to figure out. Let's do it together. Ilena's reflection questions: [ ] In the 12-24 months before I became pregnant, I was preoccupied with... [ ] If I reflect back to my pregnancy, these are the ideas, the ideals and the topics, that I was preoccupied with [ ] As I look back now, on those 12-24 months before pregnancy, and that period in pregnancy, I wish I had spent more time exploring... [ ] As I glance back into my matrescence journey thus far, these are the things that spring to mind as the most surprisingly fullfilling aspects of my inner and outter transformation. [ ] These are the realisations about the way I was parented and how matrescence was modelled to me as I have been on the journey through matrescence [ ] As I look forward to the next 12 months of my identity expansion, beyond the every day parenting, I would like to explore these aspects of my identity and of my experience of matrescence

Summer is coming and as the sun will shine down in the Netherlands, and summer holiday vibes will be in the air Together with Elizabeth Goode from Goode Writes and Reads, where, Eva and Maren are happy to announce the DamGoode Bookclub - will be reading three parenting books over the summer. You will be able to listen in to our synopsis on these books, on the first Monday of each month over the summer. The books chosen are: June: The Happiest Kids in the World: Bringing up Children the Dutch Way by Rina Mae Acosta and Michele Hutchison  July: The Book You Wish Your Parents Had Read And Your Children Will Be Glad That You Did by Philippa Perry August: The Whole-Brain Child : 12 Revolutionary Strategies to Nurture Your Child's Developing Mind by Daniel J Siegel Be sure to join us on Instagram for each DamGoode Bookclub and join in on the chats - give your own perspective if you read the books - or even suggestions if there are other books you want to hear about.