Date, Affirm, The Real
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© Marcus Goodwin & Keya McClain
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Date, Affirm, The Real (DAR) is a group created to discuss healthy relationship with self, in dating relationship and marriage. The group focuses heavily on black healthy relationships. Our focus is on healthy, healing, positive and affirming love. The discussions range from topics related to all things self-love and healthy relationships.
121 Episodes
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Love sounds good until real life hits the budget. 💔💸In this episode of Date, Affirm, the Real, Marcus and Don ask the questions most people avoid — should you even be dating if your finances aren’t where you want them to be?Is being honest about money early a sign of maturity or a relationship red flag? And can love still grow when your bank account’s catching up to your heart?Join the conversation as we unpack financial vulnerability, pride, timing, and truth in today’s dating world. Because sometimes, being “ready for love” means more than just emotional connection — it’s about alignment, transparency, and real priorities.
Are men and women really the problem—or are we just fighting the wrong fight?In this episode of Date, Affirm, The Real, hosts Marcus Goodwin and Don (Jr. Lily) sit down to unpack the tension between men and women in today’s dating and relationship culture. We share our real thoughts and experiences on how negative views fuel division, and what it takes to shift the focus toward understanding, respect, and true connection.
We Can’t Just Recover | Date, Affirm, The Real PodcastAfter the end of a true love, “recovery” isn’t always possible — the loss stays with you. In this episode, hosts Keya and Shimeka break down the difference between trying to recover and choosing to move forward. They explore the pain of heartbreak, the lessons it leaves behind, and how love can be rediscovered in new ways, even when the old wounds never fully fade.
Are we in a “sex recession”? 📉 According to new research, Americans are having less sex now than in the 90s—with young adults leading the trend. But is that really a bad thing? On this episode of Date, Affirm, The Real, we break down the article’s findings, why people are prioritizing sex less, and whether intimacy should remain at the center of relationships—or if love, purpose, and partnership matter more.
What happens when lust enters the picture? In this episode of Date, Affirm the Real, we dive into the difference between love and lust, what it feels like when a woman has lust for you, and how it impacts dating, marriage, and respect in relationships. From boundaries to energy exchange, we unpack the lessons and leave you with reflections on building connections rooted in truth, not just desire.
Hosts Marcus Goodwin and Don (Jr. Lily) get real about ego, upbringing, and the struggle to show love without fear. Is vulnerability strength—or weakness—for Black men?
We’ve all heard the 80/20 rule — focus on the 20% that gives 80% of the results. But what if that “rule” is actually holding you back? ⚖️In this episode, hosts Keya McClain the Poet and Shimeka the DAR Therapist break down why the 80/20 mindset may be keeping you from real balance, deeper love, and lasting success.
Is cheating really wrong—or just misunderstood? On this episode of Date, Affirm, the Real, Marcus and Don take a bold look at infidelity from the cheater’s perspective. With the phrase “If you ain’t cheating, you ain’t trying” trending in today’s hookup and viral culture, we’re asking: does cheating still carry meaningful consequences, or has it lost its weight in modern relationships? Is it always about betrayal, or something deeper—like emotional neglect, fear of commitment, or just playing the game? Let’s get real about loyalty, lies, and the blurred lines of modern love.#CheatingInRelationships #DateAffirmTheReal #EmotionalAffairs #ModernLoveTruths #Coldplay
In this episode of Date, Affirm, the Real, hosts Keya McClain the Poet and Shimeka the DAR Therapist sit down with special guest Shulanda Nance-Barnett, certified menopause coach, to talk facts, feelings, and the real impact of menopause—not just on women, but on relationships and life as a whole.Title: Not Just a Woman Thing: Menopause, Relationships, & Real ImpactThis isn’t just a women’s health conversation—it’s a human relationship conversation. Whether you’re living through it or loving someone who is, this episode brings clarity, compassion, and real talk. Men, tune in too—this knowledge is for you.
Keya McClain the Poet and Shimeka the DAR Therapist dive into the explosive viral clip of the couple caught cheating at the Coldplay concert. But this isn’t just gossip—it’s a real conversation. They unpack the emotional fallout, public shame, and what it means for relationships in the age of social media. It’s raw, it’s real, and it’s all Date, Affirm, the Real.
What if everything you’ve been taught about love... is wrong? In this episode of Date, Affirm, the Real, Keya McClain the Poet and Shimeka the DAR Therapist challenge the traditional rules society puts on relationships. From timelines to gender roles, they’re asking the real questions: Do we have to follow the script—or can we write our own love story? Tune in for a bold, honest conversation about love, freedom, and choosing what really works for you.
Can Red Flags Turn into Green Flags? On this episode of Date, Affirm, the Real, Marcus and Don are keeping it all the way real. We’ve all seen the red flags—but do they always mean run? Or is there potential underneath the surface that’s worth exploring? From mixed signals to personal growth, they break down how confusing relationships can be when things shift from bad to good… or back again
In this episode of *Date, Affirm, the Real*, Marcus and Don dive into a question many avoid: "Are They Ready for the Cookout?" Your family can be a window into your future—and their reaction to your partner can reveal more than you think. Should your date meet your family early on? What does their interaction say about long-term potential... or possible red flags? From awkward dinners to unexpected approvals, they’re breaking it all down.
Are you really into them—or just afraid of being alone? In this episode of Date, Affirm, the Real, hosts Keya and Shimeka unpack the uncomfortable truth behind settling in relationships. Are you choosing connection or just avoiding loneliness? Let’s talk about the emotional cost of companionship without true compatibility.
Ever feel like dating today is just a big multiple choice test — pick from what's left and hope it's right? In this episode of Date, Affirm, the Real, Keya and Shimeka explore how we choose our partners: Are we truly manifesting and affirming what we want, or settling and filling in the blanks? For men and women, it’s time to check in on those non-negotiables.#BlackLove #DatingStandards #RelationshipTalk #AffirmYourWorth
In this episode of Date, Affirm, the Real Podcast, hosts Marcus and Don dive deep into the heart of modern dating with "The Prize and the Pursuer: Analyzing Current Dating Dynamics."Is it okay for both men and women to chase? Or does that signal imbalance and potential failure from the start? We’re unpacking the raw truths, emotional stakes, and outdated norms surrounding pursuit and value in today’s dating scene. Get ready for unfiltered opinions, real talk, and honest questions you need to be asking.
Can love truly thrive when pain from the past still lingers? In this eye-opening episode of Date, Affirm, the Real, Keya McClain the Poet and Shimeka the DAR Therapist dive deep into the emotional baggage we carry into relationships. From silent resentment to unresolved heartbreak, learn how holding on can hold you back from the love you deserve.Let’s get real about healing.
What the hell is Black Love, really? In this episode of Date, Affirm, the Real, Marcus and Don sit down to unpack what Black Love means to them — the beauty, the struggle, the stereotypes, and the questions around whether it's something only African Americans can truly understand. This is a real, honest convo about love, culture, and connection from two Black men keeping it all the way real.#BlackLove #DateAffirmTheReal #RealTalk
Dating with an open mind and intent means being honest and wanting the best for you and those you encounter. You may find them attractive and really nice, however they are not for you and you have the right person in mind. No spark here but a flame is waiting for you. Are you open to it??
Traditional marriage often comes with the expectation of sharing a home, but what if that’s not the only way? In this episode, we’re diving into the concept of married couples living in separate homes—by choice.Could having your own space strengthen the relationship rather than weaken it? Does distance truly make the heart grow fonder, or does it create disconnection? We’ll explore:🔥 The reasons couples choose to live separately🔥 The benefits—personal space, independence, and maintaining individuality🔥 The challenges—logistics, intimacy, and societal judgment🔥 How to make it work for those considering this lifestyleIs living apart the key to a healthier, more fulfilling marriage, or does it create unnecessary distance? Let’s unpack this modern approach to love and commitment.
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