Today's episode features the amazing hosts of Dateable Podcast, Yue Xu and Julie Krafchick. They have been sharing their dating advice for 8 years with thousands of daters everywhere. We get into super practical tips for having better conversations on dates, the importance of screening your matches, and the mindset shifts you need to be more curious and less attached to the outcome. We also talk about the common thing that successful daters have: wanting a relationship, not needing one, and knowing what your "north star" is in dating. At the end, we do a rapid-fire round of "Is it a red flag if?". Follow Dateable on IG: https://www.instagram.com/dateablepodcast/ Slide into my DMs on IG: https://www.instagram.com/dating.intentionally/ Follow on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@dating.intentionally Get my free dating FAQ guide: http://eepurl.com/ihTMYj Read more on the blog: https://intentionally.dating/blog-posts/ Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@Dating.Intentionally About Yue Xu and Julie Krafchick Julie Krafchick & Yue Xu are the co-hosts and creators of Dateable, which has been named one of the top podcasts about modern dating and relationships by the New York Times, The Huffington Post, Oprah Daily, and more. As active daters turned dating insiders, they’ve interviewed thousands of daters and world-renowned experts over the last decade to understand why we date the way we do. But more importantly, with this information, share how you can rise above modern dating culture, get out of this dating apocalypse, and DIY the love life you’ve always wanted. Subscribe to Dateable on all podcast platforms and visit dateablepodcast.com and @dateablepodcast as your go-to source for modern dating. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Have you ever been on that nightmare date where they don't ask you a single question or make an effort to get to know you? Unfortunately, it's a pretty common situation. In this episode, I explain why your date (usually it's men) doesn't ask questions and share various ways to handle that situation. I also provide ten of my favorite date questions for your next date! At the end of this episode, I answer two listener questions. The first one is from a woman who could never convince her ex-BF to go to trivia night with her friends and then saw him at that exact trivia event after they broke up. The second one is from a woman who adores her partner, but they don't have the same needs and expectations in the bedroom. Submit your anonymous dating dilemma here! https://forms.gle/wVqy9DznXQ95FCLg9 Slide into my DMs on IG: https://www.instagram.com/dating.intentionally/ Follow on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@dating.intentionally Get my free dating FAQ guide: http://eepurl.com/ihTMYj Read more on the blog: https://intentionally.dating/blog-posts/ Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@Dating.Intentionally Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Did rom-coms ruin how we view relationships? This new series, Rom Com vs. Real Life, featuring my fiance and fellow film nerd Johnny, examines that question. In this episode, we're looking at the film He's Just Not That Into You and what it's teaching viewers about dating, relationships and how it all works. This move is packed with rules, exceptions and marriage-obsessed women. What is this movie teaching us about dating and relationships? Is it helping or hurting the way we perceive long term partnership? What's realistic, and what's not? We get into it all in this first episode. Let us know what you think! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
In today's episode you'll hear from confidence and assertiveness expert Talia Bombola, who's also a professor and LMFT. We get deep into where confidence truly comes from, why we look for it in a partner and an unexpected way to start building it up on your own. We also talk about the importance of assertiveness and why it's tough for women specifically to practice, as well as ways to use assertiveness on dates (you know, when your date just won't stop talking about themselves). Finally, we discuss what it means to have an abundance mentality in all areas of life, not just dating. Connect with Talia Bombola on IG: https://www.instagram.com/taliabombola/ Slide into my DMs on IG: https://www.instagram.com/dating.intentionally/ Follow on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@dating.intentionally Get my free dating FAQ guide: http://eepurl.com/ihTMYj Read more on the blog: https://intentionally.dating/blog-posts/ Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@Dating.Intentionally About Talia Bombola: Talia Bombola, The Confidence & Assertiveness Specialist™, is a Certified Psychodynamic, Licensed Psychotherapist, and Relationship Mentor for Women. She has won Newport Beach’s Best Therapist 3 years in a row, 2022-2024 and is in the Business Hall of Fame. Her work centers around helping anxious women feel secure by increasing self-worth, confidence, and assertiveness & rewiring beliefs about themselves, men, and relationships. She helps you heal the "not enoughness" that prevents you from living a life overflowing with satisfaction and self-worth. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Maybe you've heard the advice "date multiple people," but you have no idea how it works, if it's even possible for you, or why you should try it in the first place. This is the episode for you! I'm breaking down exactly how to approach talking to multiple people and entertaining a handful of potential matches before committing to one person. This approach doesn't work for everyone, but it worked for me. It's worth trying if you tend to get attached quickly, can easily get dates and want to speed up the vetting process a bit, or want to try a different approach. IRL SUMMER WORKSHOP: https://dateintentional.samcart.com/products/irl-summer Listen to my first episode about my experience dating multiple people: https://open.spotify.com/episode/6VHcj4a97XUtKh3J8w4vPi?si=0c277cf7f4f1463b Slide into my DMs on IG: https://www.instagram.com/dating.intentionally/ Follow on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@dating.intentionally Get my free dating FAQ guide: http://eepurl.com/ihTMYj Read more on the blog: https://intentionally.dating/blog-posts/ Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@Dating.Intentionally THE AND QUESTION CARD DECKS DATING https://collabs.shop/co9ejf COUPLES https://collabs.shop/vbha7d FRIENDS https://collabs.shop/ybexcb STRANGERS https://collabs.shop/gcrlqs Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
If you're using dating apps or thinking about creating a dating app profile, this is the episode to listen to. Erika Ettin, the founder of A Little Nudge joined me on the podcast to talk all things dating apps. We get into what makes a good profile, how to swipe more effectively, what mistakes to avoid when using dating apps and so much more. At the end we play a game I made up called "Erika Explains" where she answers a bunch of your dating questions. Follow Erika: @alittlenudge https://www.instagram.com/alittlenudge/ Slide into my DMs on IG: https://www.instagram.com/dating.intentionally/ Follow on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@dating.intentionally Get my free dating FAQ guide: http://eepurl.com/ihTMYj Read more on the blog: https://intentionally.dating/blog-posts/ Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@Dating.Intentionally About Erika Ettin: Erika Ettin holds a BA in economics from Cornell University and an MBA from Georgetown University. Since launching her online dating consulting business, A Little Nudge, Erika has helped hundreds of clients in the United States and abroad find happiness. She currently lives in Washington, D.C. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Do you feel like you're being harsh when you set boundaries with people you date? Are you scared of saying no? You're not alone. If you tend to be a people-pleaser, starting to set boundaries feels strange. Maybe you even feel a little guilt for having and setting boundaries. This episode breaks down what boundaries are, what they're not and why they're important. I talk about what boundaries are good to have in early dating and how to enforce them in a direct way (not a mean way). Slide into my DMs on IG: https://www.instagram.com/dating.intentionally/ Follow on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@dating.intentionally Get my free dating FAQ guide: http://eepurl.com/ihTMYj Read more on the blog: https://intentionally.dating/blog-posts/ Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@Dating.Intentionally Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Whether you're sober or sober-curious, this episode is packed with sage advice from Tawny Lara, the Sober Sexpert. Tawny shares insights from her sober dating journey that will open your eyes to how much alcohol permeates dating culture and what you can do to decide if how much you drink in your dating process is working for you or not. We get into how to date (and who to date) when you're sober, how to support someone who is sober if you're not and the best dry date ideas. We also discussed alcohol's role in sex and how to evaluate whether or not you're safely consuming alcohol in the context of physical intimacy. Slide into my DMs on IG: https://www.instagram.com/dating.intentionally/ Follow on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@dating.intentionally Get my free dating FAQ guide: http://eepurl.com/ihTMYj Read more on the blog: https://intentionally.dating/blog-posts/ Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@Dating.Intentionally About Tawny Lara: Tawny Lara, AKA The Sober Sexpert, is the author of Dry Humping: A Guide to Dating, Relating, and Hooking Up Without the Booze, co-host of the Recovery Rocks podcast, and co-founder of the vinegar-based botanical beverage, (parentheses) https://www.instagram.com/tawnymlara/ https://www.drinkparentheses.com/ https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/730665/dry-humping-by-tawny-lara/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
We're switching it up this week with some Q&A! I answered 10 questions you submitted on Instagram. Some are dating questions I've never really touched on before; some are personal questions about things I rarely get to talk about publicly. Questions I answer in this episode: How do you genuinely keep hope of finding your person when dating seems hard? How to do long distance in the early days? We are 1.5 hours apart. Do you or your partner have any spicy preferences? How did you bring it up? Do you feel like you experienced enough as a bi woman before this relationship? Advice for mid 40’s Female, first time dating post-divorce and interested in women for the first time? Did you feel like men approached you differently dating at 30? What if you can travel a lot more than your partner but that’s an important thing for you? You’ve said Johnny was smitten right away. How much do you think that contributed to your relationship success? How do you go from needing to wanting a partner? Did you think you’d be where you’re at in life at 32? Slide into my DMs on IG: https://www.instagram.com/dating.intentionally/ Follow on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@dating.intentionally Get my free dating FAQ guide: http://eepurl.com/ihTMYj Read more on the blog: https://intentionally.dating/blog-posts/ Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@Dating.Intentionally Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Break ups suck. Luckily, we have experts like Amy Chan, who wrote Break Up Bootcamp, to help us through them. In this episode, Amy and I discuss where to start with healing after a break up, the importance of anger in the process of moving on, why it hurts more when a short relationship ends and how to know when a relationship is worth trying to save vs when to let go. We also talked about being friends with an ex and how to know when you're ready to start dating again. Connect with Amy: https://www.instagram.com/missamychan/ Slide into my DMs on IG: https://www.instagram.com/dating.intentionally/ Follow on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@dating.intentionally Get my free dating FAQ guide: http://eepurl.com/ihTMYj Read more on the blog: https://intentionally.dating/blog-posts/ Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@Dating.Intentionally About Amy: Amy Chan is the Founder of Renew Breakup Bootcamp, a retreat that takes a scientific and spiritual approach to heal the heart. The Observer calls her "A relationship expert whose work is like that of a scientific Carrie Bradshaw'' and her company has been featured across national media including Good Morning America, Vogue, Glamour, Nightline, The Times, CNN, Fortune and more. Her New York Times featured book, Breakup Bootcamp - The Science of Rewiring Your Heart, published by Harper Collins, was an instant best-seller. She is launching a new Dating Bootcamp this summer. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Worried you're heading into situationship territory? This episode breaks down what a situationship is, what it isn't and why they're not ideal. I get into 10 different signs you're heading into a situationship and how to steer clear of them altogether. This episode is your guide for what to do and NOT do when you feel like the person you're dating is not on the same page but wants to keep dating anyway. Can you turn a situationship into a relationship? Find out in this episode. At the end, I share some personal updates and wedding updates! I also answer questions about situationships in this episode: How long is too long to be dating without commitment? Should you keep a situationship while dating others for something serious? What if I’m comfortable with how it is not labeled? Can I roll with it until there’s a change? How do you transition from a situationship to a relationship? How to avoid situationships without being pushy How to stay strong when they come back Slide into my DMs on IG: https://www.instagram.com/dating.intentionally/ Follow on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@dating.intentionally Get my free dating FAQ guide: http://eepurl.com/ihTMYj Read more on the blog: https://intentionally.dating/blog-posts/ Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@Dating.Intentionally Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
In this episode, I talk to dating coach and former psychologist Jackie Glaser about how our inner world and the stories we tell ourselves dictate so much of how our lives unfold - especially when it comes to dating. We get into how to feel our self-worth, how to date when you feel like no one has ever been interested in you, showing up authentically on dates and so much more. This was such a powerful conversation and I love Jackie's spiritual approach to dating! Connect with Jackie Glaser: https://www.instagram.com/jackieglaserofficial/?hl=en Slide into my DMs on IG: https://www.instagram.com/dating.intentionally/ Follow on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@dating.intentionally Get my free dating FAQ guide: http://eepurl.com/ihTMYj Read more on the blog: https://intentionally.dating/blog-posts/ Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@Dating.Intentionally Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
How do you know you're ready to date? How do you start dating if you've never done it before? This episode is the pep talk you need to get out there (or back out there) with a healthy mindset and knowing what to expect. I talk about how to know you're ready to date vs how to know you're ready for a relationship, my best advice for having the right mindset going into dating after a long break and practical tips for getting dates on the calendar and feeling more confident. You got this!! Follow on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@dating.intentionally Get my free dating FAQ guide: http://eepurl.com/ihTMYj Read more on the blog: https://intentionally.dating/blog-posts/ Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@Dating.Intentionally Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
If you're looking to feel more comfortable and confident during sex, this episode is for you. I talk to Claire Perelman, a certified sex therapist and one of my favorite creators on social media, about navigating sex with a new partner, approaching sexual situations when you're newly out as queer, and creating safety while enjoying physical intimacy. We also talk about her coming out story, how to properly give feedback to a sexual partner, healing from sexual trauma, and so much more. At the end of this episode, we answer a listener's question about dating someone who's not a great texter. Use code PODCAST for a discount on my course/workshop on How To Identify Your Needs MAY 6 WORKSHOP: https://dateintentional.samcart.com/products/figure-out-needs COURSE: https://dating-intentionally.mykajabi.com/offers/2NMTrWo4/checkout More places to connect with me: Slide into my DMs on IG: https://www.instagram.com/dating.intentionally/ Follow on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@dating.intentionally Full show notes: https://intentionally.dating/claire-perelman/ Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@Dating.Intentionally About Claire Perelman Claire Perelman (she/her) is a Queer, Jewish Sex Therapist living and working in the Bay Area. She is passionate about helping people rediscover play, pleasure, and abundance in their sexuality. Relationships have been the source of her greatest pleasure and heartbreak, which led her to specialize in working with couples, individuals, and polycules around sex and intimacy. You can find her at @sexclarified (on all platforms) and www.sexclarified.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Rejection will happen in your dating life, so you better be prepared! These ten reminders will help you stay grounded and positive when rejection happens, and I hope by listening to this, you'll be able to shake it off faster. Which reminder did you need to hear the most? DM me on IG and let me know! @dating.intentionally. Slide into my DMs on IG: https://www.instagram.com/dating.intentionally/ Follow on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@dating.intentionally Get my free dating FAQ guide: http://eepurl.com/ihTMYj Read more on the blog: https://intentionally.dating/blog-posts/ Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@Dating.Intentionally Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Are you curious about manifestation? Do you want to learn how to have more of an abundance mentality? In this episode, I talk to business coach Tiffany Cheung about how to tap into your own magnetism, embrace an abundance mentality, and how she approaches dating as a single parent to a 9 y/o. Tiffany shares her story about overcoming financial hardship, being on her own with a child as a teen mom, and healing from trauma. Her journey has had a lot of ups and downs, but it has led her to build a successful coaching business and dating life she loves. You'll learn tips for being more approachable in the wild, being unapologetic about what you want, and dating as a single parent. I know you'll love this convo! Connect with Tiffany: https://www.instagram.com/tiffanycheung.co/?hl=en Slide into my DMs on IG: https://www.instagram.com/dating.intentionally/ Follow on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@dating.intentionally Get my free dating FAQ guide: http://eepurl.com/ihTMYj Show notes: https://intentionally.dating/episode-64/ Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@Dating.Intentionally About Tiffany Cheung Tiffany Cheung is an Asian, queer, ADHD business coach from the SF Bay Area, a business coach manifestation expert, published author x2, and podcast host of the Social Reset Podcast. Tiffany is leading a revolution rooted in breaking women of color out of limiting boxes. She helps them develop their self-expression and teaches business through a mind-body-soul approach. She started her business in 2020 after years of struggling as a single mom living off of food stamps. Today, Tiffany runs a nearly 7-figure business, working closely with first-generation, heart-centered women to build businesses that create logic-defying results. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
I've seen it repeatedly in my dating life and heard stories about people withdrawing after sex from the Dating Intentionally community. For some reason, after you have sex with someone you're newly dating, they tend to pull away. Why does this happen? This episode lays out the five most common reasons this happens and what you can do it about it in the future when/if this happens to you again. Slide into my DMs on IG: https://www.instagram.com/dating.intentionally/ Follow on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@dating.intentionally Get my free dating FAQ guide: http://eepurl.com/ihTMYj Read more on the blog: https://intentionally.dating/blog-posts/ Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@Dating.Intentionally Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Have you tried tracking your dates? This episode features Jillian Romero Chaves, the founder of Clara For Daters (Not A Dating App), which lets daters track their dates and stay accountable. Jillian talks about how taking notes on her dates using Clara helped her (and other users) gain clarity in the process and make more informed decisions. Slide into my DMs on IG: https://www.instagram.com/dating.intentionally/ Follow on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@dating.intentionally Get my free dating FAQ guide: http://eepurl.com/ihTMYj Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@Dating.Intentionally About Jillian Romero Chaves Jillian Romero Chaves is a dynamic visionary who has pioneered transformative changes in the dating and relationship health landscape. As the Founder and CEO of Clara for Daters, she leads a revolution that empowers individuals to make informed, purposeful choices in their dating lives. Check out Clara For Daters: https://www.clarafordaters.com/ Connect with Jillian: https://www.instagram.com/clarafordaters Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Dating outside your type seems to work for many people, but how do you do it? And what if it leads to dates where there's no attraction? This episode walks you through all my tips and tricks for dating outside your type and how to navigate a lack of attraction when it happens. I also share my experience, my type, and how my fiance doesn't fit into it at all. Thank you to everyone who shared what their type is on Instagram! You can slide into my DMs anytime: @dating.intentionally. My type: https://www.instagram.com/p/CexiXgIL33l/ Follow on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@dating.intentionally Get my free dating FAQ guide: http://eepurl.com/ihTMYj Read more on the blog: https://intentionally.dating/blog-posts/ Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@Dating.Intentionally Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
"If he wanted to he would" is one of the worst dating rules and on this episode Ali Jackson, the host of Finding Mr. Height, shares why. We also get into what happened when I hired Ali as a dating coach 2 years ago, dating through grief, meeting dates IRL, how to stop minimizing parts of yourself in dating, Ali's personal dating "rules" and so much more. Ali is a wealth of knowledge and you're going to love her practical dating advice! Follow Ali: https://www.instagram.com/findingmrheight/?hl=en Slide into my DMs: https://www.instagram.com/dating.intentionally/ Get all Dating Intentionally Episodes on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/DIPodcast About Ali Jackson: Ali Jackson is an NYC-based dating & relationship coach who’s been there, in the trenches, looking for her person. She’s learned to own her needs, embrace her feelings, and communicate both directly. And she’s helping you do the same! Because when you ask for what you want, you just might get it. You can find her on social media @findingmrheight and on her website findingmrheight.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices