While Dear HBR: is on hiatus, we want to introduce you to HBR’s podcast for young professionals, New Here, hosted by Elainy Mata. Whether it’s your first job or a fresh start, New Here will help you build a meaningful career on your own terms. In this episode, Elainy and comedian Sarah Cooper break down the unwritten rules around to how to behave in a new job—otherwise known as office etiquette. Listen for free to season one of New Here at HBR.org/Podcasts/New-Here or wherever you get your podcasts.
This new podcast features real-life coaching sessions with leaders working to overcome professional challenges. In this episode, host Muriel Wilkins speaks with a woman who’s been walking a tightrope between addressing a superior’s microaggressions and making her team feel safe. Wilkins coaches this manager toward the actions she can take to improve the situation and build a healthier culture at her organization. "Coaching Real leaders" is part of HBR Presents, a network of business podcasts curated by HBR editors.
Is it time to do something different in your career? Dan and Alison answer your questions with the help of Bruce Feiler, a researcher and the author of Life Is in the Transitions. They talk through what to do when you’ve been out of work and can’t find a job the usual ways, you feel lost in the ambiguity of a new role, or you want to convince your boss to release you to another team.
Is it hard for you to give or get feedback virtually? Dan and Alison answer your questions with the help of Marcus Buckingham, a cohead of the ADP Research Institute and the author of Nine Lies about Work. They talk through what to do when you want to tell your boss they’re derailing virtual meetings, you’re starting a new job remotely and getting little guidance, or you want more feedback on your organization’s performance during the pandemic.
Is the pandemic making you rethink your commute? Dan and Alison answer your questions with the help of Ashley Whillans, a professor at Harvard Business School and the author of the new book Time Smart. They talk through what to do when you want to work remotely but your company is against it, you’re considering a new job closer to home, or you’ve been offered a job that’s a great fit but comes with a longer commute.
What will it take for you to feel safe at work again? Dan and Alison answer your questions with the help of Ethan Bernstein, a professor at Harvard Business School. They talk through what to do when your essential employees are staying home despite increased safety measures, you want to redesign your open office to make it work for the new normal, or you’re seeing a growing divide between workers who have to come in and those who can work from home.
Are you experiencing gender bias at work? Dan and Alison answer your questions with the help of Katie Coffman, a professor at Harvard Business School. They talk through what to do when you are held to a higher standard as a female manager, you’ve been promoted but a male deputy has been chosen for you, or you join a company that is living in the past.
Do you wish you could understand your boss better? Dan and Alison answer your questions with the help of Mimi Nicklin, a business coach and author. They talk through what to do when you have a boss who is unforgiving, who relies on you to cover their flaws, or who flip-flops between being your warm friend and cold supervisor.
Do you have a difficult subordinate who needs coaching? Dan and Alison answer your questions with the help of Melvin Smith, a professor at the Weatherhead School of Management at Case Western Reserve University. They talk through what to do when your new employee is slacking off, a new hire needs to adjust to your organization’s culture and communication style, or you have to coach two direct reports who are in conflict with each other.
Are your workplace dilemmas different because you’re in the public sector? Dan and Alison answer your questions with the help of Bernie Banks, a retired U.S. Army general and a professor at Kellogg School of Management at Northwestern University. They talk through what to do when you want to effect change as a middle manager in the military, you’re battling misperceptions of public-sector work as you switch to the private sector, or you want to boost the morale of your team of government workers.
Are you a working parent stressing over how to advance your career during the pandemic? Dan and Alison answer your questions with the help of Alyssa Westring, a professor at DePaul University’s Driehaus College of Business. They talk through what to do when you now want to quit your job to be a stay-at-home parent, your reduced salary and growth prospects are hurting your plans to have children, or a Covid-delayed job start date is tricky timing for your pregnancy.
Do you have what it takes to be a manager? Dan and Alison answer your questions with the help of Ellen Van Oosten, a professor at the Weatherhead School of Management at Case Western Reserve University. They talk through what to do when you’ve been tapped for a managerial role but you don’t want it, you have only informal management experience on your CV, or your supervisor is blocking you from earning the title of manager.
Are you struggling with start-up life? Dan and Alison answer your questions with the help of Dave Balter, an entrepreneur, CEO, and author. They talk through what to do when you’re burning out due to a frenzied workload, a key hire is hurting your start-up’s culture, or you want more pay because of your fast-growing responsibilities.
As an engineer, do you feel you carry a bigger burden at work? Dan and Alison answer your questions with the help of Richard Sheridan, an engineer, CEO, and author. They talk through what to do when you want to influence decisions as a technical expert, you’re a female engineer seeing your male counterparts promoted more quickly, or you have a hard time committing fully to flawed projects.
Are you unsure of when to toot your own horn? Dan and Alison answer your questions with the help of Meredith Fineman, a communication coach and author. They talk through what to do when your boss takes credit for your accomplishments, your employer doesn’t value what you bring to the table, or your braggart colleague is getting all the growth opportunities.
Is a team you manage keeping you up at night? Dan and Alison answer your questions with the help of Melanie Parish, a leadership coach and author. They talk through what to do when you lead a rogue team that doesn’t follow company processes, your growing team of managers is clamoring to weigh in on key decisions, or you want to improve the morale of a frustrated team.
Is your new employer pushing back your start date due to the pandemic? Dan and Alison answer your questions with the help of Moshe Cohen, a senior lecturer at Boston University’s Questrom School of Business. In this bonus episode, they talk through what to do when your new boss postpones your first day on the job and then doesn’t respond to your communications.
Are you contemplating a career change? Dan and Alison answer your questions with the help of Monica Higgins, a professor at Harvard Graduate School of Education. They talk through what to do when you’re having trouble breaking into a new field, you want to leave a secure career path for something riskier, or you’re eyeing a new industry but don’t know where to start.
Are you leaving your organization during a critical time? Dan and Alison answer your questions with the help of Shirli Kopelman, a negotiations professor at the University of Michigan’s Ross School of Business. In this bonus episode, they talk through what to do when you’re planning to give notice during the coronavirus pandemic and can’t train your replacement.
Do you fear speaking frankly with your supervisor? Dan and Alison answer your questions with the help of Liz Kislik, a management consultant and executive coach. They talk through what to do when your boss micromanages your output, you want to set boundaries for better work-life balance, or your new supervisor is eagerly volunteering your team for too many projects.
Kelly Curtis
I also loathe the word cohort. It feels like a hair ball rolled in nut butter. And it's pretentious.
Lauren Lowe
At 2:00 the letter writer sounds like they need extra simulation - not necessarily extrovert vs introversion. Have they considered possible ADHD?
Amin reza Lakzian
3. Six months might not be sufficient enough for head of a large department to be completely in command however his employees are obviously not motivated and if he has not seen any improvement in their motivation his approach in shaping climate and relationships must change. Intrinsic motivation is best achieved simultaneous to formation of relationships, he might have postponed it until after establishment of relationships. To achieve extrinsic motivation he might have to modify hr systems for example rewarding processes. He could also make sure vision and objectives are articulate and well communicated. The tears he could ignore as far as he knows the employees are feeling fine skin deep. Thank you very much for the awesome content.
Amin reza Lakzian
2. She is throwing tantrums one way or another like a child because she is probably operating with her mindset in the child state since she's most probably insecure in her position and based on the described situation the other employee though probably possessing high EQ has established a kind of malfunctional relationship, vicious cycle of tantrums > attention given in the wrong way > repetition of tantrums. Her compassion is nurturing a kind of codependent relationship. Detachment via keeping boundaries through proper means is needed. She has to be reassured that the other employee's behaviour is due to the insecurity which she would probably overcome; this will provide her with the shield she needs against the dysfunctional behaviour. Some coaching by a competent employee might help the childish behaviour to evolve into professional one as the employee finds the appropriate working persona.
Amin reza Lakzian
1- As he has started as an HR business partner about 2 month ago he's probably still going through some socialisation process, probably some divestiture tactics, inherently arising stress, he has probably a lot to learn as well and the learning process produces some tension too. So he needs some time to grow and the situations will be less demanding for him soon. From the employed destressing tactics I guess he's probably an introvert, more prone to react to the authority enforced on him by his boss under the pressure. Ruminations about messing things up is actually a reaction. He could try and make a few mistakes and see that the consequences are not as bad as had thought. After all no one's completely flawless and mistakes which are dealt with correctly many times bring about better approaches. That might be the rationale behind the fact that some leading companies encourage their employees to make mistakes.