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Elite Rugby Banter
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Elite Rugby Banter - the rugby pod where the commentary is as unpredictable as the bounce of the ball. Join Phil, Ant, and Andrew, three rugby nerds and fantasy draft managers, as they give their biased and unqualified but never dispassionate opinions on all things rugby related.
Andrew:
Rugby claim to fame: length of the field try against Bishops for the u12 C team
Teams supported other than the Springboks: Stormers, Scotland
Favourite rugby moment: every Breyton Paulse flick-flack
Ant:
Rugby claim to fame: Lightest hooker to play senior rugby for UCT
Teams other than the Springboks: Sharks, Giltinis (RIP), Nambia
Favourite rugby moment: any Frans Steyn 50m kick, or Louis Carbonel pointing and laughing at the english before slotting a conversion, or RG fighting the whole Aussie team
Phil:
Rugby claim to fame: Smashed through a whole a Kingswood team to score a magical try (twice)
Teams other than the Lions: Springboks, England, Cheetahs
Favourite rugby moment: Lions comprehensive win over the Sharks in the 2011 Currie Cup final
You can find them on Spotify, iTunes, Soundcloud, and Acast.
Andrew:
Rugby claim to fame: length of the field try against Bishops for the u12 C team
Teams supported other than the Springboks: Stormers, Scotland
Favourite rugby moment: every Breyton Paulse flick-flack
Ant:
Rugby claim to fame: Lightest hooker to play senior rugby for UCT
Teams other than the Springboks: Sharks, Giltinis (RIP), Nambia
Favourite rugby moment: any Frans Steyn 50m kick, or Louis Carbonel pointing and laughing at the english before slotting a conversion, or RG fighting the whole Aussie team
Phil:
Rugby claim to fame: Smashed through a whole a Kingswood team to score a magical try (twice)
Teams other than the Lions: Springboks, England, Cheetahs
Favourite rugby moment: Lions comprehensive win over the Sharks in the 2011 Currie Cup final
You can find them on Spotify, iTunes, Soundcloud, and Acast.
367 Episodes
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This week, Dick blows the whistle on the TRC’s scheduling shenanigans, accusing them of high tackle interference with the Women’s RWC and AFL finals. It’s a calendar clash of titanic proportions, and someone’s getting yellow-carded.
We scrum down on the age-old debate: Six Nations or TRC—which competition reigns supreme? Spoiler: it’s less “crown jewel” and more “jewel heist,” depending on your hemisphere.
The Lions did a thing—celebrated like Currie Cup champions at 80 minutes, then promptly remembered they’re allergic to silverware. We unpack the collapse, the curse, and the cruel optimism.
Meanwhile, New Zealand rugby might be going full haka-flameout, and Australia’s eyeing the unthinkable double— breaking both the Eden Park and Bledisloe hoodoes. Is it a golden age or just fool’s gold?
Plus: the URC kicks off and our draft preview goes off the rails faster than a Bulls fan at altitude. Expect botched picks, bruised egos, and a few players who were drafted purely for their haircuts.
Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.
What a weekend of rugby... The Wallabies and Argentina got our morning's off to a great start with a highly entertaining clash, followed up by what was one of the all-time great halves of rugby from the Springboks and a record defeat for the All Blacks. The Springbok Women then closed out the double up with an inspired debut in the World Cup knockouts, ultimately falling to the superior Black Ferns. Oh, and the Lions used their URC players to cheat their way to yet another Currie Cup final.
Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.
Rain and the ref seem to be common excuses going around the South African water coolers this week, but in all honesty the Boks had only themselves to blame for gifting Ardie Savea a victory in his 100th Test. While the Springbok men failed to create history, the women will write a new chapter as they appear in their first ever RWC quarter final against New Zealand this week, lining up a tasty Kiwi doubleheader for Bok fans. Andy is optimistic this week about Rassie's brow-raising, youthful selections for the second Test, while Phil and Ant are more pragmatic. Perhaps even more gruelling than dissecting a Springbok loss is having to say nice things about the Wallabies for the third episode in a row. Yuck.
Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.
Aseza Hele, Libbie Janse van Rensburg, Nadine Roos, Nolusindiso Booi... A special generation of Springbok women have made history with a first ever appearance in the RWC knockouts. Ant and Andy revel in the green glow and recount this historic moment. The Springbok men also feature, with a recap of the Wallabies win and a nervous note on the upcoming game-of-the-year against the All Blacks in fortress Eden Park.
Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.
Well, nobody saw that coming. The Springboks spontaneously combusted as the Wallabies ran in wonder try after wonder try at Ellis Park to take a famous victory. But, the pod believes a victory next week is still the most likely outcome as some mitigating factors emerge. Perhaps some hard but necessary lessons learned in this shock defeat?
Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.
Short answer, no. The consensus is that even Ireland is better than the B&I Lions. The real question is Argentina better than the Lions? They beat them. But England B beat Argentina. So are England B better than the Lions? And are England B better than England A? Is Maro Itoje the problem? If you asked Andre Piardi, he'd probably say "si". But then, after this week's controversy, do we trust anything he says? This week's episode isn't sponsored, but Panados might have helped with the headaches. For Tizzano also. Although he wasn't hit in the head. Or was he? Also, Currie Cup! Go Golden Lions!
Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.
The Boks have wrapped up their on-field preparations for the Rugby Championship with a testing but worthy win over the physical Georgians. All that remains is to sit back and watch the dull, light beer clashes Down Under while Rassie fine tunes his first choices. On the domestic front, the Currie Cup gets going with some of our u20 World Champions in the mix, and the Imbokodo prep for the Black Ferns.
Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.
OG Adam is back for a guest appearance this week and drops a few hot takes for good measure. Is Henco van Wyk the Marco van Staden of centres? We're not convinced, but we're here for it anyway. Jasper sees red as the Boks run over the top of Italy, NZ get their groove back, and the Lions loom large for the Wallabies as the first Test draws nearer.
Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.
What do Steve and Mike Wosniak have in common? Well, it's not rugby as we find out in this mythbusting ERB episode. There was a lot of rugby to cover with the international season underway. The Boks managed to keep down an unexpectedly strong Italian espresso with no help from the bomb squad (cue the fireworks). New Zealand nearly choked on a C-grade baguette while Fiji couldn't quite stomach an undercooked kangaroo steak. We expected a mauling from the Lions but it was with a hiss rather than a roar that they overcame the Tahs. This and more in a bumper episode from Ant, Phil and Andy.
Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.
The Boks sent the BaaBaas packing but not without a few boxes of South African wine. Rassie started the season doing Rassie things with Esterhuizen playing flank, while Kolbe continued to embarrass opposition but not as much as O'Mahony getting swindled like Eskom buying an exorbitant dummy from SAFM. In other news, the Junior Sprintboks (sic) sped their way to a dominant scoreline against Aus, and the B&I Lions Forced their way to 50 in Western Australian to kickstart their tour Down Under.
Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.
Ant, Phil and Andy recap the two season finales for URC and Super Rugby as well as the non-Test between the B&I Lions (minus Leinster) and Argentina (minus most of their first choice French clubbers). The Lions head off to Australia with more questions than answers but Ant like a good Brit thinks this might be a good thing. The Super Clubs of Leinster and the Crusaders add more trophies to their storied histories, and the Bulls bullies get taught a lesson at Choke, I mean Croke, Park. Meanwhile, attention turns to the Test window, with an appetizer in the form of the BaaBaas in Cape Town who have already run up significant bills at Caprice in Clifton if rumours are to be believed.
From the pressure cooker (kicker?) of Kingsmead to the doldrums of Scotstoun and the predictable fortresses of Loftus and the Aviva, the URC quarter finals are now behind us. One South African side will appear in a fourth consecutive final, but who will it be? Will wily Willie outwit the wing-center Hooker? The Champions Cup final was a humdinger, but was Pollock a pillock or a Saint? Finally, will the Antipodean fans be able to grasp the inanity of the Super Rugby Pacific knockout (kinda, but not really?) round? (Hint: we struggled.) Have a listen to find out. PS. A big congrats to Ant and Phil, winners of our SRP and URC draft leagues, respectively!
Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.
Hey! Remember us? It's been a while, but that means there's plenty to talk about. URC and Super Rugby Pacific approach their business ends while the announcement of a Lions tour gives us plenty to chew on. Is the fate of the Crusaders tied to Will Jordan's knee? Is Mack Hansen injured or is it just a conspiracy? And why is he banned on Hinge? Is Andy older than a potato? Find out here.
Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.
Is Hooker a hooker? Is Tizzano a hooker? What about Henco? Or Marnus? Spoiler: probably only the last one. But listen anyway to find out.
It has been a while! Ant, Phil and Andy quickly recap the lost episode wrapping up the Six Nations before turning to the tail end of the URC and a highly entertaining Super Rugby Pacific edition.
Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.
A very special in-person episode was recorded for your pleasure, seeing a return of not only Andrew but Ant's rants and Super Rugby Pacific. The reunited trio look ahead to the rugby extravaganza that is SRP, asking the deep questions like who can stop the Blues, can the Crusaders get any worse and will all of the Australians improve without the Rebels. We also look back on the first two weeks of the 6 Nations (Rugby's Greatest Championship™) as Ant lets his feelings known strongly about their claim to be the best and at all of the big news from the rugby world including the inevitable demise of one Warren Gatland.
Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.
Better late than never! Ant has a lot to get off his chest after a couple of months away. Joined by Phil, the duo assess the state of play for the South African teams in the URC and Champions/Challenge Cup before diving into a 6 Nations preview. Can the Sharks go all the way in the URC? What is wrong with the Stormers? Will the Bulls and Lions make their games in hand count? And will Wales finally break their losing streak? All these questions answered and more!
Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.
The Boks have dominated the Player of the Year nominees, but will World Rugby conspire to select another Irish backrower? Phil and Andy launch the #JusticeForOx campaign as they ask whether rugby will always let props eat cake without proper recognition. The duo shine the spotlight on the latest fixtures like Stade de France did on the haka, and then sidestep like Kolbe to consider the impending Cardiff feast.
Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.
The former colonies dominated as the South swept aside the imperialist North in the Autumn Nations Series as cocky fans' egos swelled more than Kolisi's eye socket. Bok supporters are still unhappy with four tries to none, while Will Jordan keeps advancing on Dougie Howlett's record. Australia get a famous win despite being a Schmidt team, and Fiji hand Wales off in entertaining fashion. Lots to talk about in this week's bumper episode of Elite Rugby Banter.
Strap-in for a bum-per episode this week.
Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.
Is Marcus Smith the Messiah? Or was it a bad Ford to cross. Are Scotland the real deal, or are Fiji just anti W(h)ales? Can anyone stop Sititi or Telea (spoiler, you'll find out on Friday).
The gang (sans Bird) run the rule over what each team (including Kenya) would deem a success for the autumn/spring/November/end of year tour.
Music by @monstroid, 80s TV Show.
Dick takes a swing at hosting as the team recaps the URC progress of the South African teams. Listen in as the misinformed mispronounce and sometimes miss the point, unlike David (Richard no T) Kriel against Benetton. To sweeten things up, dessert is served in the form of a quick preview of the upcoming international fixtures as well.
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smoky chicken. too smoky. burger here us poor folk dont have a smoker we use a weber charcoal grill to smoke with hard wood soaked in liquid. maybe your wood was the problem or the chicken wasn't fabricated. or could be a temperature or vent problem. 200 to 225 Fahrenheit. drink beer or wine when smoking. cheers!
glad to hear Mapimpi is getting paid!
Yeah lads. Canadian rugby is a bit of a shit show. And don't deserve much off their investment in the past year. Germany also has a bit of a mare. It'd be interesting to know how Russia, Spain or Belgium would have done if they weren't chucked.