Emotional Sobriety: The Next Step in Recovery

Bill Wilson, co-founder of Alcoholic's Anonymous, wrote in 1952, "If we examine every disturbance we have, great or small, we will find at the root some unhealthy dependence and its consequent demand." Wilson suggested that if we could identify and continually surrender these unrealistic and unrecognizable demands, that we may then be able to accomplish what he imagined to be recovery's next frontier - something he called emotional sobriety.   Flash forward 70 years, and join psychotherapists and best-selling authors Thom Rutledge and Dr. Allen Berger, who have taken up the mantle of exploring Bill Wilson's new frontier. Welcome to Emotional Sobriety.

Acorn to Oak Tree with Herb K.

Four of us take stock of our personal arcs towards greater emotional sobriety. Happiness, as Herb Kaighan frames it, isn’t a product of the work we do. It’s a byproduct of our relationships with a life of meaning and purpose, as well as our contributions to humanity. Thom advises self-compassion coupled with personal responsibility - so that we’re keeping ourselves accountable but through a language of love instead of hate. Allen underlines the fact that emotional sobriety isn’t something we arrive at passively. We need to foreground it to bring it into being.

11-17
36:22

Should Auld Acquaintance Be Forgot

Going into yet another fraught American Presidential election, Allen, Thom, and Patrick discuss their fears and feelings of debt and responsibility to their fellows. On top of the political implications that come with the event, these times of intense conflict truly put our emotional sobriety to the test.   Access a few of Thom’s political pieces:   Open Letter: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1lRuTLtClOZOKu2zmXA8RQ2lcPC4TzzbL/view?usp=sharing Two Things I Don’t Understand: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1N-q7_50MOvDWIruov9qtMqoYJNwc2D23/view?usp=sharing Trump’s Amends Speech: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1eKRnBKINmdj30yMCa-ZRKPK_ErZvU5j6/view?usp=sharing   Check out Howard Malitz’ Seasons of Sobriety podcast: https://pod.link/1460539626   Join an ongoing Zoom meeting wherein participants read 30 Things: Practical Advice for Living Well chapter-by-chapter here: 11.00am East Coast / 4.00pm U.K. ID: 875 319 1947 Password: 2GROWIN   Learn more about Joe C., Secular AA and Rebellion Dogs here: https://rebelliondogspublishing.com/   Upcoming events with Allen Berger: https://abphd.com/events/   Follow us on social media. Podcast Twitter: @EmSobrietyPod Instagram: thomrutledge2 Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs   Friendly Circle Berlin Workshop Group meets every Monday @ 7:30pm (Berlin), 6:30pm (Ireland & UK), 1:30pm EST, 10:30am PST Zoom Link:  https://us02web.zoom.us/j/5505019905   Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/   Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986   For our ongoing workshop video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g   Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519 We’d l...

11-04
36:10

How's Your Practice?

Friend of the pod Howard Malitz of Seasons of Recovery talks about an extreme test of emotional sobriety on a recent road trip. Thom gives us an update on his recovery from cancer and advises giving people we’re crossed up with the benefit of the doubt. And if we must make assumptions about people, let’s try to make better ones! Read the AA Grapevine from today’s episode - The Guy Who Ruined My Meeting here: https://drive.google.com/file/d/10MlTBHrJ_U1w8JnTyN-Uvpc38AABd6XZ/view?usp=sharing   Check out Howard Malitz’ Seasons of Sobriety podcast: https://pod.link/1460539626   Join an ongoing Zoom meeting wherein participants read 30 Things: Practical Advice for Living Well chapter-by-chapter here: 11.00am East Coast / 4.00pm U.K. ID: 875 319 1947 Password: 2GROWIN   Learn more about Joe C., Secular AA and Rebellion Dogs here: https://rebelliondogspublishing.com/   Upcoming events with Allen Berger: https://abphd.com/events/   Follow us on social media. Podcast Twitter: @EmSobrietyPod Instagram: thomrutledge2 Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs   Friendly Circle Berlin Workshop Group meets every Monday @ 7:30pm (Berlin), 6:30pm (Ireland & UK), 1:30pm EST, 10:30am PST Zoom Link:  https://us02web.zoom.us/j/5505019905   Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/   Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986   For our ongoing workshop video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g   Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519 We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.   We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirective4@gmail.com for any questions or comments.

10-30
47:26

Emotional Sobriety as “Democratic Pluralism”

Joe C., Allen, and Thom welcome author William Schaberg (Bill), author of 30 Things: Practical Advice for Living Well to discuss recovery and emotional sobriety, reading a passage from his book along the way. In striving to attain unity but not uniformity with our fellows, we pursue what Bill refers to as “the most extreme form of democratic pluralism imaginable.”   Learn more about or purchase 30 Things: Practical Advice for Living Well https://30thingsthebook.com/   Join an ongoing Zoom meeting wherein participants read William Schaberg's 30 Things chapter-by-chapter here: 11.00am East Coast / 4.00pm U.K. ID: 875 319 1947 Password: 2GROWIN   To listen to pitches from, Allen, Joe Chisholm, and others from the ICSAA conference in Orlando: aasecular.org   Learn more about Joe C., Secular AA and Rebellion Dogs here: https://rebelliondogspublishing.com/   Check out Howard Malitz’ Seasons of Sobriety podcast: https://pod.link/1460539626   Upcoming events with Allen Berger: https://abphd.com/events/   Follow us on social media. Podcast Twitter: @EmSobrietyPod Instagram: thomrutledge2 Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs   Friendly Circle Berlin Workshop Group meets every Monday @ 7:30pm (Berlin), 6:30pm (Ireland & UK), 1:30pm EST, 10:30am PST Zoom Link:  https://us02web.zoom.us/j/5505019905   Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/   Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986   For our ongoing workshop video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g   Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519 We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.   We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirective4@gmail.com for any questions or comments.

10-21
48:04

Acknowledging & Accepting Another Perspective

Joe C., Allen, and Thom read from William Schaberg’s 30 Things: Practical Advice for Living Well to further explore the dismantling of “shoulds.” Our self-centeredness that’s expressed in an inability to not accept others’ feelings is also an expression of emotional dependency. One goal of emotional sobriety is to connect with others more readily and deeply. As Schaberg writes, by laying aside our judgements (unreasonable expectations; unenforceable rules), the world becomes “wider, broader and far more interesting.”   Learn more about or purchase 30 Things: https://30thingsthebook.com/   To listen to pitches from, Allen, Joe Chisholm, and others from the ICSAA conference in Orlando: aasecular.org   Learn more about Joe C., Secular AA and Rebellion Dogs here: https://rebelliondogspublishing.com/   Check out Howard Malitz’ Seasons of Sobriety podcast: https://pod.link/1460539626   Upcoming events with Allen Berger: https://abphd.com/events/   Follow us on social media. Podcast Twitter: @EmSobrietyPod Instagram: thomrutledge2 Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs   Friendly Circle Berlin Workshop Group meets every Monday @ 7:30pm (Berlin), 6:30pm (Ireland & UK), 1:30pm EST, 10:30am PST Zoom Link:  https://us02web.zoom.us/j/5505019905   Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/   Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986   For our ongoing workshop video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g   Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519 We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.   We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirective4@gmail.com for any questions or comments.

10-13
41:13

Expanding the Zone of Comfort

The fellas discuss the role of anger in emotional sobriety. We also read a thoughtful email from one of our Australian listers, about holding onto ourselves in toxic families of origin.   To listen to pitches from, Allen, Joe Chisholm, and others from their recent ICSAA conference in Orlando, FL: aasecular.org   Learn more about Joe C., Secular AA and Rebellion Dogs here: https://rebelliondogspublishing.com/   Check out Howard Malitz’ Seasons of Sobriety podcast: https://pod.link/1460539626   Upcoming events with Allen Berger: https://abphd.com/events/   Follow us on social media. Podcast Twitter: @EmSobrietyPod Instagram: thomrutledge2 Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs   Friendly Circle Berlin Workshop Group meets every Monday @ 7:30pm (Berlin), 6:30pm (Ireland & UK), 1:30pm EST, 10:30am PST Zoom Link:  https://us02web.zoom.us/j/5505019905   Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/   Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986   For our ongoing workshop video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g   Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519 We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.   We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirective4@gmail.com for any questions or comments.

10-06
30:57

In Pardoning, We Are Pardoned

On the journey towards forgiving others, we can’t bypass our grief. Thom, Patrick, and Tom Potash discuss both processing and letting go of grievance, focusing today on our families of origin. One way of looking at forgiveness is as our natural state when we aren’t holding onto old pain.   Tom Potash found his earliest inkling of what forgiving his mother could mean for his emotional sobriety in the prayer of St. Francis of Assisi:   Lord, make me an instrument of your peace: where there is hatred, let me sow love; where there is injury, pardon; where there is doubt, faith; where there is despair, hope; where there is darkness, light; where there is sadness, joy. O divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console, to be understood as to understand, to be loved as to love. For it is in giving that we receive, it is in pardoning that we are pardoned, and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life.     To listen to pitches from, Allen, Joe Chisholm, and others from last week’s ICSAA conference in Orlando: aasecular.org   Learn more about Joe C., Secular AA and Rebellion Dogs here: https://rebelliondogspublishing.com/   Check out Howard Malitz’ Seasons of Sobriety podcast: https://pod.link/1460539626   Upcoming events with Allen Berger: https://abphd.com/events/   Follow us on social media. Podcast Twitter: @EmSobrietyPod Instagram: thomrutledge2 Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs   Friendly Circle Berlin Workshop Group meets every Monday @ 7:30pm (Berlin), 6:30pm (Ireland & UK), 1:30pm EST, 10:30am PST Zoom Link:  https://us02web.zoom.us/j/5505019905   Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/   Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986   For our ongoing workshop video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g   Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Gro...

09-29
40:21

He Doth Protest Too Much (Missive from ICSAA)!

Allen Berger and Joe Chisholm check in from this year’s ICSAA conference in Orlando, Florida, to relay an anecdote from one of the speakers: “we aren’t all egomaniacs!” When we aren’t seen by our fellows, it creates an injury to our self-esteem. As we develop more differentiation (emotional sobriety), it becomes easier to not allow other people’s comments to define us. Until such time, the group conscience should look out for each other, practicing empathy and sensitivity. After all, the business of recovery is lifting other people up, so we don’t only survive but thrive. Another important takeaway from this secular conference: militant atheism can be just as toxic as militant theism.   Once the conference is wrapped, listen to pitches from, Allen, Joe, and others: aasecular.org   Learn more about Joe C., Secular AA and Rebellion Dogs here: https://rebelliondogspublishing.com/   Check out Howard Malitz’ Seasons of Sobriety podcast: https://pod.link/1460539626   Upcoming events with Allen Berger: https://abphd.com/events/   Follow us on social media. Podcast Twitter: @EmSobrietyPod Instagram: thomrutledge2 Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs   Friendly Circle Berlin Workshop Group meets every Monday @ 7:30pm (Berlin), 6:30pm (Ireland & UK), 1:30pm EST, 10:30am PST Zoom Link:  https://us02web.zoom.us/j/5505019905   Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/   Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986   For our ongoing workshop video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g   Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519 We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.   We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirective4@gmail.com for any questions or comments.

09-22
30:40

So Worth Living

Allen, Thom, and Patrick read from the AA Grapevine again and reflect on the story of someone in recovery from addiction who suffered traumatic brain injury. Emotional Sobriety promises more than just a sober stasis. True freedom is possible as we transition away from "okay if" towards "okay even if" framework for living our lives.  To read today’s AA Grapevine article, “So Worth Living,” access the .pdf at the following link: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1sYq85EFs-2cdwmlLb-rE2auB0bqQ_1tA/view?usp=sharing   Coming up for our Florida or travel-happy listeners is the International Conference of Secular AA (ICSAA) in Orlando, FL, September 20-22nd, where Allen Berger, Joe C. and other luminaries will be speaking. More info at the following link: https://www.aasecular.org/icsaa2024   Learn more about Joe C., Secular AA and Rebellion Dogs here: https://rebelliondogspublishing.com/   Check out Howard Malitz’ Seasons of Sobriety podcast: https://pod.link/1460539626   Upcoming events with Allen Berger: https://abphd.com/events/   Follow us on social media. Podcast Twitter: @EmSobrietyPod Instagram: thomrutledge2 Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs   Friendly Circle Berlin Workshop Group meets every Monday @ 7:30pm (Berlin), 6:30pm (Ireland & UK), 1:30pm EST, 10:30am PST Zoom Link:  https://us02web.zoom.us/j/5505019905   Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/   Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986   For our ongoing workshop video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g   Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519 We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.   We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirective4@gmail.com for any questions or comments.

09-16
30:15

Grip Lightly

No matter our level of certainty about anything, emotional sobriety advises holding the truth in our hands but gripping it lightly. We find “rolling with the punches” to be much stronger survival mechanism than the inflexibility and ossification of a fixed position. This week, Allen and Thom talk more about perfectionism and freedom, which we define as having the possibility of a new experience at any given moment of our lives.   Coming up for our Florida or travel-happy listeners is the International Conference of Secular AA (ICSAA) in Orlando, FL, September 20-22nd, where Allen Berger, Joe C. and other luminaries will be speaking. More info at the following link: https://www.aasecular.org/icsaa2024   Learn more about Joe C., Secular AA and Rebellion Dogs here: https://rebelliondogspublishing.com/   Check out Howard Malitz’ Seasons of Sobriety podcast: https://pod.link/1460539626   Upcoming events with Allen Berger: https://abphd.com/events/   Follow us on social media. Podcast Twitter: @EmSobrietyPod Instagram: thomrutledge2 Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs   Friendly Circle Berlin Workshop Group meets every Monday @ 7:30pm (Berlin), 6:30pm (Ireland & UK), 1:30pm EST, 10:30am PST Zoom Link:  https://us02web.zoom.us/j/5505019905   Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/   Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986   For our ongoing workshop video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g   Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519 We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.   We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirective4@gmail.com for any questions or comments.

09-09
32:19

Challenging Core Beliefs

Our sagely Joe Chisholm returns for heartfelt conversation about the negative self-concepts that can undermine our recoveries. Experiences which are imprinted onto us at a young age become core beliefs about ourselves which mature into unhelpful distortions. Feelings of unworthiness and shame are just a couple Thom and Patrick explore this week. The work of becoming emotionally sober involves challenging these beliefs through staying present. How do we stay present? Through the development of a daily practice.   Coming up for our Florida or travel-happy listeners is the International Conference of Secular AA (ICSAA) in Orlando, FL, September 20-22nd, where Allen Berger, Joe C. and other luminaries will be speaking. More info at the following link: https://www.aasecular.org/icsaa2024   Learn more about Joe C., Secular AA and Rebellion Dogs here: https://rebelliondogspublishing.com/   Check out Howard Malitz’ Seasons of Sobriety podcast: https://pod.link/1460539626   Upcoming events with Allen Berger: https://abphd.com/events/   Follow us on social media. Podcast Twitter: @EmSobrietyPod Instagram: thomrutledge2 Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs   Friendly Circle Berlin Workshop Group meets every Monday @ 7:30pm (Berlin), 6:30pm (Ireland & UK), 1:30pm EST, 10:30am PST Zoom Link:  https://us02web.zoom.us/j/5505019905   Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/   Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986   For our ongoing workshop video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g   Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519 We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.   We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirective4@gmail.com for any questions or comments.

09-02
50:30

When We Need Outside Help

Howard Malitz returns to the pod to read and discuss another AA Grapevine article, which deals with the role of therapy, medication, and other mental health “outside help” that can unfortunately run into judgment and skepticism in certain rooms of recovery. A non-punitive attitude of openness, compassion, and encouragement towards “whatever works” keeps more people in the boat as we build the communities that sustain us.   Read a pdf of the AA Grapevine article we discussed in the episode, “When We Need Outside Help”: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1f-3EYLLZuB06G4IYhGdZlmTazew5yUt1/view?usp=sharing   Check out Howard Malitz’ Seasons of Sobriety podcast: https://pod.link/1460539626   Learn more about Joe C., Secular AA and Rebellion Dogs here: https://rebelliondogspublishing.com/   Upcoming events with Allen Berger: https://abphd.com/events/   Follow us on social media. Podcast Twitter: @EmSobrietyPod Instagram: thomrutledge2 Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs   Friendly Circle Berlin Workshop Group meets every Monday @ 7:30pm (Berlin), 6:30pm (Ireland & UK), 1:30pm EST, 10:30am PST Zoom Link:  https://us02web.zoom.us/j/5505019905   Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/   Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986   For our ongoing workshop video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g   Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519 We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.   We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirective4@gmail.com for any questions or comments.

08-25
44:15

Accepting the Road Ahead with Dr. Shawn Horn

Author, psychologist and TEDx speaker Dr. Shawn Horn rejoins us to discuss her upcoming project about adults with ADHD, with particular focus on our nervous system’s role in our emotional experience. From there we read another article from the AA Grapevine, and speak further to how emotional sobriety can help us stay connected to each other and ourselves as we move through grief.   Read a pdf of the AA Grapevine article we discussed in the episode, “Accepting the Road Ahead”: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1D4-4km2J83TjCle-QmmVD3147hrL9KP0/view?usp=drive_link   Links to learn more about the phenomenal Dr. Shawn Horn:   Sign up for her newsletter to receive updates and resources.  Webinars are launching; don’t miss them!  Website: https://www.drshawnhorn.com    Listen to the Inspired Living Podcast:  https://feeds.simplecast.com/cuykCUfC    Follow her on Social Media Here:  Instagram: www.instagram.com/drshawnhorn  Facebook: www.facebook.com/drshawnhorn  Twitter: www.twitter.com/drshawnhorn  Triller: @drshawnhorn  Pinterest: @drshawnhorn  LinkedIn: @drshawnhorn   Buy Christian Journal for Women with Anxiety: Prompts to Soothe Anxious Thoughts and Find Strength in Your Faith Book Here: https://a.co/d/dqJLbAr   Learn more about Joe C., Secular AA and Rebellion Dogs here: https://rebelliondogspublishing.com/   Upcoming events with Allen Berger: https://abphd.com/events/   Follow us on social media. Podcast Twitter: @EmSobrietyPod Instagram: thomrutledge2 Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs   Friendly Circle Berlin Workshop Group meets every Monday @ 7:30pm (Berlin), 6:30pm (Ireland & UK), 1:30pm EST, 10:30am PST Zoom Link:  https://us02web.zoom.us/j/5505019905   Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/   Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513

08-12
36:41

Stay Connected & Add More Self

Joe C. rejoins Allen and Thom this week, to discuss looking beyond what a person is saying to focus on what they’re experiencing. Modeling emotional sobriety tools in ever-growing circles (beyond our meetings and loved ones) into a world in need of good examples. Practicing emotional sobriety in environments where there's none, or very little.   “Listen now. When people talk listen completely. Don't be thinking what you're going to say. Most people never listen. Nor do they observe. You should be able to go into a room and when you come out know everything that you saw there and not only that. If that room gave you any feeling you should know exactly what it was that gave you that feeling. Try that for practice. When you're in town stand outside the theatre and see how the people differ in the way they get out of taxis or motor cars. There are a thousands ways to practice. And always think of other people.” -Ernest Hemingway   Learn more about Joe C., Secular AA and Rebellion Dogs here: https://rebelliondogspublishing.com/   Upcoming events with Allen Berger: https://abphd.com/events/   Follow us on social media. Podcast Twitter: @EmSobrietyPod Instagram: thomrutledge2 Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs   Friendly Circle Berlin Workshop Group meets every Monday @ 7:30pm (Berlin), 6:30pm (Ireland & UK), 1:30pm EST, 10:30am PST Zoom Link:  https://us02web.zoom.us/j/5505019905   Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/   Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986   For our ongoing workshop video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g   Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519 We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.   We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirective4@gmail.com for any questions or comments.

08-04
56:17

Balancing on the Relational Beam

Allen, Thom, and Patrick discuss the challenge and opportunity in conducting their relationships in a manner appropriate to those relationships. We circle back to politics, where despite our differences we try to not lose our human connection and empathy for our fellows.   Read Thom’s “Therapy 4 Politics”: https://www.thomrutledge.com/therapy4politics   Learn more about Joe C., Secular AA and Rebellion Dogs here: https://rebelliondogspublishing.com/   Upcoming events with Allen Berger: https://abphd.com/events/   Follow us on social media. Podcast Twitter: @EmSobrietyPod Instagram: thomrutledge2 Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs   Friendly Circle Berlin Workshop Group meets every Monday @ 7:30pm (Berlin), 6:30pm (Ireland & UK), 1:30pm EST, 10:30am PST Zoom Link:  https://us02web.zoom.us/j/5505019905   Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/   Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986   For our ongoing workshop video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g   Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519 We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.   We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirective4@gmail.com for any questions or comments.

07-28
33:04

Beating the Questionnaire

Allen, Thom, and Patrick bring their AA Grapevine series to a close and talk "doomscrolling," rehab, and first steps.   This week’s “Emotional Sobriety” Grapevine Article, “The Zinger,” can be accessed here via .pdf: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1b-uDb9bGY2omGXgfw4ztLq3-b2QFDKi2/view?usp=sharing   Learn more about Joe C., Secular AA and Rebellion Dogs here: https://rebelliondogspublishing.com/   Upcoming events with Allen Berger: https://abphd.com/events/   Follow us on social media. Podcast Twitter: @EmSobrietyPod Instagram: thomrutledge2 Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs   Friendly Circle Berlin Workshop Group meets every Monday @ 7:30pm (Berlin), 6:30pm (Ireland & UK), 1:30pm EST, 10:30am PST Zoom Link:  https://us02web.zoom.us/j/5505019905   Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/   Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986   For our ongoing workshop video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g   Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519 We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.   We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirective4@gmail.com for any questions or comments.

07-14
35:34

Hurtling Towards Serenity

Joe C. and Thom join Patrick before Allen pops in to discuss our second to last AA Grapevine reading series on Emotional Sobriety.   This week’s Emotional Sobriety Grapevine Article, “Batter Up,” can be accessed here via .pdf: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1qX48R8UzkFYuL9gHS4OgQNtQ4KL3KQeD/view?usp=sharing   Learn more about Joe C., Secular AA and Rebellion Dogs here: https://rebelliondogspublishing.com/   Upcoming events with Allen Berger: https://abphd.com/events/   Follow us on social media. Podcast Twitter: @EmSobrietyPod Instagram: thomrutledge2 Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs   Friendly Circle Berlin Workshop Group meets every Monday @ 7:30pm (Berlin), 6:30pm (Ireland & UK), 1:30pm EST, 10:30am PST Zoom Link:  https://us02web.zoom.us/j/5505019905   Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/   Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986   For our ongoing workshop video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g   Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519 We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.   We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirective4@gmail.com for any questions or comments.

07-07
34:45

Life Goes On

Carol Carter drops by to help us read the latest in Emotional Sobriety from the AA Grapevine - the first article in our series that has some objectionable beats, which Allen and Thom get into. Some emphasis this week on the loved ones we lose during our recovery, and how we can manage the grief that arises.   This week’s “Emotional Sobriety” Grapevine Article, “Life Goes On” can be accessed here via .pdf: https://drive.google.com/file/d/107HghvemUOnUxBG0oQ0LRQK5lUvsk5OM/view?usp=drive_link   Check out Howard Malitz’ Seasons of Sobriety podcast: https://pod.link/1460539626   Upcoming events with Allen Berger: https://abphd.com/events/   Follow us on social media. Podcast Twitter: @EmSobrietyPod Instagram: thomrutledge2 Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs   Friendly Circle Berlin Workshop Group meets every Monday @ 7:30pm (Berlin), 6:30pm (Ireland & UK), 1:30pm EST, 10:30am PST Zoom Link:  https://us02web.zoom.us/j/5505019905   Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/   Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986   For our ongoing workshop video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g   Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519 We’d love to stay in touch in between workshops.   We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirective4@gmail.com for any questions or comments.

06-23
27:39

Get Quiet, and Listen

Earnie Larsen once said, “Your program cannot take you further than your definition of recovery.” Take a moment and answer the following question: What is your definition of recovery?   Happy Father's Day from Allen, Thom, and Patrick to all who celebrate.   This week’s “Emotional Sobriety” Grapevine Article, “Tink, Tink, Tink,” can be accessed herehttps://www.aagrapevine.org/magazine/2024/jan/tink-tink-tink   Check out Howard Malitz’ Seasons of Sobriety podcast: https://pod.link/1460539626   Upcoming events with Allen Berger: https://abphd.com/events/   Follow us on social media. Podcast Twitter: @EmSobrietyPod Instagram: thomrutledge2 Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs   Friendly Circle Berlin Workshop Group meets every Monday @ 7:30pm (Berlin), 6:30pm (Ireland & UK), 1:30pm EST, 10:30am PST Zoom Link:  https://us02web.zoom.us/j/5505019905   Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/   Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986   For our ongoing workshop video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g   Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519 We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.   We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirective4@gmail.com for any questions or comments.      

06-16
24:33

Connection/Hope/Identity/Meaning/Empowement

Joe C. brings the CHIME recovery model from a recent workshop into our eternally unfolding discussion of what it means to be emotionally sober. Even when we’re falling off the beam, there’s lessons in the struggle to stay balanced.    Check out Howard Malitz’ Seasons of Sobriety podcast: https://pod.link/1460539626   Upcoming events with Allen Berger: https://abphd.com/events/   Follow us on social media. Podcast Twitter: @EmSobrietyPod Instagram: thomrutledge2 Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs   Friendly Circle Berlin Workshop Group meets every Monday @ 7:30pm (Berlin), 6:30pm (Ireland & UK), 1:30pm EST, 10:30am PST Zoom Link:  https://us02web.zoom.us/j/5505019905   Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/   Thom's book, Embracing Fear: https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Fear-Turn-Scares-Greatest/dp/0062517759/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=   Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below):   https://zoom.us/j/330149513 Password: 375986   For our ongoing workshop video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g   Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519 We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.   We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirective4@gmail.com for any questions or comments.

06-03
48:39

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