Failing Motherhood

<p>If you're riddled with mom guilt, your temper scares you, you're terrified you're screwing up your kids and are afraid to admit any of those things out loud....this podcast is for you. Hosted by Danielle Bettmann, parenting coach for families with 1-10-year-old strong-willed kids, Failing Motherhood is where shame-free vulnerability meets breakthroughs.  <br>Every other week is a storytelling interview about one mom's raw and honest experience of growth that leads to new perspectives and practical strategies and every other week solo episodes focus on actionable insight into parenting your deeply feeling, highly sensitive, *spicy* child. <br>Here, we normalize the struggle, share openly about our insecurities, and rally around small wins and truths. We hope to convince you you're not alone and YOU are the parent your kids need. We hope you see yourself, hear your story, and find hope and healing. <br>Welcome to Failing Motherhood. You belong here!</p>

It's OK to Walk Away + What to Do When You Can't

We all dread it - the inevitable meltdown of EPIC proportions. It’s survival mode, and no one is immune.In this episode, I share why I disagree with typical advice (and even Dr. Becky) on how to manage these meltdowns/outbursts, why it’s OK to walk away, and what to do when you can’t. IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED:An analogy to help illustrate your responsibilityWhy staying WITH your child might actually backfireHow to “leave” the room without physically leavingDON'T MISS:Mantras to adopt tha...

12-17
26:46

7 Steps to a Successful Holiday with a Strong-Willed Child

The holiday season is upon us filled with changes, anticipation, late nights, unfamiliar meals, sweets, high emotions, extra tasks and stress.Your strong-willed child will understandably have an even harder time navigating all of this unpredictability, triggers, and lack of routine.Tune in to hear my 7 steps to a more successful holiday season for the whole family! IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED:What to say NO to and whyCritical mindset shifts that allow you to prevent rather than reactHow to ...

12-10
24:52

Cultivating Resilience + Managing Stress through Times of Uncertainty with Dr. Tovah Klein, PhD

… seems timely, right?My guest today, Dr. Tovah P. Klein, Ph.D. is the author of Raising Resilience: How to Help Our Children Thrive in Times of Uncertainty. In her role as a researcher and professor and in direct care with parents and children for over thirty years, Klein has helped to define what every child needs to thrive, regardless of their life situations.In our episode today, Dr. Tovah breaks down the 5 critical pillars that are the roots of resilience our kids need to be okay when th...

12-03
58:17

How to Tag In/Out with your Partner with Dignity + Compassion

No couple goes into parenting as a perfectly united front. Every parent runs out of steam, hits a wall, and loses it from time to time. Good parents ask good questions like “How can I help my partner when things are going off the rails without stepping on their toes?”Before you hop in the car and start parenting extra challenging behaviors in front of extended family this holiday season, have this important conversation with your partner to set you both up for much more success. IN THIS ...

11-26
22:23

The Antidote for Shame + Guilt

There is something ALL parenting books are missing. You cannot fake it. There is no substitute. It is transformational.…and it’s the critical antidote to guilt + shame.If you’ve tried EVERYTHING under the sun- this might be the reason why you’ve stayed stuck. And it’s more needed than ever before. IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED:What my daughter’s violin teacher did that changed the game for me as a parentThe real reason why my coaching wasn’t helping familiesWhy a healthy sense of skepticism i...

11-19
21:26

NO REGRETS

One of my kids just received a diagnosis. It was 10 years in the making because school was not seeing any of the symptoms we saw at home until now.In light of this milestone for our family, I’m sharing a personal reflection of my own parenting. As parenting is often filled with confusion, overwhelm, guilt and regret… here are things I do NOT regret.IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED:A vulnerable audit of my own parentingWhat to do if your child is too young to be diagnosed with ADHD but you think they ...

11-12
08:17

Kids are Not Content with Sarah Adams (@Mom.Uncharted)

What’s wrong with sharing pictures on Facebook so grandparents can see the kids?As parents in 2024, we’re in uncharted waters trying to navigate our own internet use, let alone our kids’.My guest today, Sarah Adams, is an online safety advocate and expert, exploring the state of parental public oversharing, child exploitation and minor security on social media.While diving into the harsh realities of the Internet in 2024, she defines some key terms we should know, the impact of the pandemic, ...

11-05
54:35

Managing Halloween Candy + Holiday Sweets with Nicole Cruz, RD

T minus 2 days until a candy avalanche is at our doorsteps!Thankfully, my guest today, Nicole Cruz, RD is here to take some weight off our shoulders.Nicole is the founder of Nourish Together, a shame-free approach to family nutrition. As a Registered Dietitian and mom of three, Nicole supports parents in raising confident eaters who can eat a variety, listen to their body cues, and not obsess over sweets or other ‘treats’.We start off our conversation naming many of the understandable fears a...

10-29
35:32

Raising Gifted & Twice-Exceptional (2e) Kids with Erin Vanek

Are you in the midst of the chaotic beautiful hard journey that is raising a gifted child at your house? Can you know "for sure" if your child is gifted?My guest today, Erin Vanek has spent well over a decade supporting gifted students with a Master's in Education and an endorsement in gifted education. She's also the founder of The Gifted Perspective, offering workshops, printable resources, and activities, and fostering a strong social media community. At home, she navigates the chall...

10-22
49:04

VOTE

Election day in the US is in 21 days (Tuesday, November 5th). Early voting has already began! As parents, our kids are counting on us. Every vote counts, especially in the smallest races and ballot initiatives, shaping the world our kids grow up in.I do not expect you to agree with everything (or anything) I share here today and that's okay. I just want you to vote!IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED:Things you can't know about your family's futureA memory I'm afraid to admitConcepts that ar...

10-15
15:22

Stepmom Support: From Proving Yourself to Living a Kick-Ass Life with Jamie Scrimgeour

One could say with motherhood, you know what you’re signing up for - but you certainly have no idea how it will feel. As a Child of Divorce and Child Protection Worker with a background in Psychology and Social Service Work, Jamie Scrimgeour thought she knew what she was signing up for as a childless bachelorette when she decided to marry a man with three kids and an ex. But as I am sure you can guess, she felt like she had no freaking idea, and quickly found herself in-over-her he...

10-08
49:09

The Problem with Obedience

When other kids at the park instantly listen to their parents, it can make even the most well-intentioned parent feel self-conscious (and a little jealous).Isn’t that the goal? A child who listens without hesitation?Let’s talk about it.IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED:The longterm ramifications of putting obedience on a pedestalWhat to focus on and aim for insteadA question to ask yourself to reflect on your approachDON'T MISS:The limiting factor that makes all of this extra challenging with strong-w...

10-01
16:28

ADHD in Motherhood with Patricia Sung

"You can't have ADHD! You have a master's degree!"... and other misconceptions about ADHD. Whether you've been diagnosed, related to the memes, or have a child that's been diagnosed... this episode is for you! Patricia Sung, Adult ADHD coach and host of Motherhood in ADHD, is here to share her journey into diagnosis, understanding her unique brain, and empowering other moms to do the same.We normalize the struggle, share new insights, and reflect on the powerful act of breaking cycles.I...

09-24
01:01:32

"Hold the Football": A Behavior Modification Tool

In today's quick episode, I break down a key facet to behavior modification I've been supporting a lot of clients with lately! It’s not a surefire guarantee toward cupcakes, rainbows and butterflies - but it is necessary shift in your communication that doesn’t contribute to a crash and burn affect.IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED:2 Examples of effective behavior modification outside of parentingWhat the "Hold the Football" Tool is and why it's criticalHow to apply this tool when a sibling is b...

09-17
12:18

"Knowing What I Know Now, I Wouldn't Become a Parent" with Holly Murphy

My guest today, Holly Murphy, is accomplished in their profession, a devoted parent in love with their kids, a vibrant personality, AND they’re open about how if they knew what they knew NOW back THEN, they would not become a parent. You might not agree with Holly, but I know they’re not the only one. If there’s one thing we are on Failing Motherhood- it’s honest - and that’s why stories like Holly’s have a place here. There is nothing more serious than making the commitment t...

09-10
01:01:22

After School Restraint Collapse

It's that time of year, when your strong-willed child keeps it together all day at school then lets it all fall apart with you the second they get in the car.I packed this episode full of perspective, mindset shifts, tangible strategies and preventative measures to equip you with the "game face" you need to tackle this transition.IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED:How to meet them where they're at while still setting boundariesWhy saying "Stop." "Don't" or "Calm down" won't work and what will insteadQu...

09-03
21:37

Surviving Until or Without Qualifying for a Diagnosis [Danielle on Moms Talk Autism]

A special gift for you this week, courtesy of our friends at Moms Talk Autism. Not only did they join me for last week’s episode, but they interviewed me on their show and were kind enough to share it with our audience so I could share it here.My work specializes in helping families who are struggling with Neurodivergent traits in their child but don’t have a diagnosis yet or whose child does not meet the criteria for a specific diagnosis.In this episode of Moms Talk Autism, I share what trai...

08-27
57:20

Building a New Dream After an Autism Diagnosis with Brittney + Shannon (Moms Talk Autism)

Today I’m sitting down with Brittney and Shannon, two out of the four moms from Moms Talk Autism, a podcast where good friends share their journeys figuring out in real time how to best support their kids and themselves, discussing school, family balance, siblings, grief, therapies, social issues, behaviors, delays, diagnosis advocacy, marriage, and more.Our conversation highlights their individual stories, Brittney with four kids - two with Autism, both with very different needs and Shannon ...

08-20
59:22

They Don't Hate YOU, They Hate...

Have you ever been told, "I HATE YOU" by your child? Or even worse "You're not coming to my birthday party!"Parents of strong-willed kids (esp. mom) can become the scapegoat for the anger they harbor, and it can lead to parents hearing things like “You don’t love me”.This often causes a spiral into permissiveness to avoid conflict, anxiety, and/or a lot of self-doubt as a parent.Spoiler Alert: They don’t hate you. They hate feeling crazy and all alone with their BIG emotions. And we do too.‌I...

08-13
16:54

A Skeptic's Take on Gentle Parenting + How to STOP Fighting and START Living with Joseph + Sarah

You are gonna be pretty hard-pressed to find more honesty than what is inside this conversation! In today's episode, I have the honor of interviewing Joseph and Sarah, my clients + parents of 6- and 21-year-old daughters. Together they share the shifts that made it possible to stop triggering their daughter's defense mechanism, get on the same page, and have an approach and home full of mutual respect.Fair warning - Joseph describes himself as a blunt, "tell-it-like-it-is" kind of guy,...

08-06
01:17:34

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