The internet is constant noise: endless scrolling, reacting and stimulation. It's rewiring our brains to consume information in tiny bursts and it's affecting everyone, including our kids. So what's the antidote? Stillness. I've spent 30 years in cybersecurity and I help families navigate technology and online safety. One pattern shows up again and again. We can't teach our kids to manage digital chaos if we can't manage it ourselves. Psychiatrist Dr. Daniel Amen teaches a simple 15-second breathing protocol. Inhale for 4 seconds, hold, exhale for 8 seconds, hold again, then repeat several cycles. That longer exhale sends a signal to the body that things are safe and it's okay to calm down. I looked for an app that uses this pattern without endless menus or decisions and couldn't find one. So I built one called Being - One Minute to Calm. When you open it, it starts immediately. No signups, no subscriptions, just breathing and stillness. It uses gentle haptic taps so you can follow the pattern with your eyes open or closed. Available on iPhone, iPad, Apple Watch and Apple TV. Android is coming soon. Search "Being - One Minute to Calm" in the App Store or visit https://www.familyitguy.com/being/ Do you have any experience with meditation or breathwork? Share your story in the comments.
How can families protect children from dangerous predators - both online and in real life? In this eye-opening episode of the Family IT Guy Podcast, Dr. Leslie Dobson, forensic psychologist, dives into the psychology of violent offenders, including child predators, and reveals why consequences in the justice system often fall short. Dr. Dobson shares real stories from her decades of experience working in prisons, state hospitals, and private practice, explaining how understanding the criminal mind can empower families to protect their children. She also discusses how social media can be a powerful tool for raising awareness and holding offenders accountable. In this episode, you’ll learn: - How offenders cycle through the criminal justice system - The limitations and corruption in handling child predators - The role of forensic psychology in protecting victims - How families can use knowledge and advocacy to improve safety - Practical insights for keeping kids safe online 📌 Subscribe for more on family safety, online protection, and tech. 👍 Like if you want to protect your family better 💬 Comment your thoughts or questions about child safety online
When smartphones started showing up in 1st grade, Meri knew something had to change. As a PR expert and mom who understood AI, algorithms, and why these devices are so addictive, she dove into the research—and then took action. In this episode, we talk about how she: 1. Partnered with schools and clinical psychologists to educate kids AND parents 2. Helped implement Wait Until 8th in her community 3. Worked with school leadership on behavior impacts from devices and social media 4. Started a “Tech Corner” in school and church newsletters 5. Equipped parents with the data they needed to make informed choices 6. Built a like-minded community instead of fighting the battle alone Her mission? Arm parents with information so they can protect their kids’ brains—not just hope tech companies or the government will. Actionable steps for parents (we cover in detail): • Alternatives to smartphones • Parent email template you can send TODAY (email info@familyitguy.com for template) • How to build a community of like-minded families: – FITG Community: https://lnk.bio/s/84ae0 – @WaitUntil8th: https://lnk.bio/s/fd234 – TinCan Phone pods: https://lnk.bio/s/1074b – Playdates with shared rules – No-photo posting waivers at school • How to confidently start conversations with other parents Your kids’ safety isn’t up for grabs—and you don’t have to wait for someone else to draw the line. Watch now and share with a parent who needs this! Subscribe for more Family IT Guy episodes that help YOU navigate tech and parenting with confidence.
Join me as I explore the world of AI toys and share my thoughts on their impact on children. As a cybersecurity expert and parent, I delve into the potential risks and benefits of these innovative toys. I discuss how AI toys work, the privacy concerns they raise, and why it's crucial for parents to stay informed. Let's ensure our kids' safety in this digital age. For more insights, visit https://www.familyitguy.com and follow me on social media. #aitoys #childsafety #FamilyITGuy This is from my conversation with the Utopian Society Project on their South Bay Live show.
This is a complete Bark Phone review and setup guide from a cybersecurity expert and dad. After testing every feature, here's my take on what Bark does well, where it falls short, and the settings I recommend changing before giving this phone to your child. THE SHORT VERSION: Bark Phone delivers on its claims. The parental controls actually work and kids can't bypass them. If my son needed a smartphone and I wanted to monitor his conversations for concerning behaviors, I would use a Bark phone. 📱 Full setup guide with screenshots: https://www.familyitguy.com/bark-phone-review.html 🔗 Get Bark Phone: https://www.familyitguy.com/go/bark 📦 Accessories you'll need that are not included: • USB-C Charger: https://amzn.to/4p42rB3 • Protective Case: https://amzn.to/3M7oqs2 DISCLOSURE: Bark sent me this phone for free to review. I have no contract with Bark and no agreement about the nature of this review. Links above are affiliate links - I earn a commission if you purchase through them, at no extra cost to you. #BarkPhone #parentalcontrols #kidsphone #firstphone #onlinesafety
Roblox just rolled out age verification THIS week, and it could put your child’s personal data at risk. If you’re a parent, you need to know what this really means—and why you don’t have to hand over your child’s face or ID to use any app. Governments and platforms are claiming these systems protect kids, but what they’re really doing is creating massive databases of children’s IDs and biometric data. And those databases are getting hacked. Last month, Discord’s age verification vendor was breached and 70,000 government IDs were stolen, including kids’ documents. Now Roblox is requiring facial age estimation or government ID to use chat, sending that data to a third-party vendor. We can say NO. You do NOT have to hand over your child’s face or your family’s IDs to use an app. I know this video is long, but it’s important for every parent to understand what’s happening. Please share this and help other families stay informed. 👇 Comment your thoughts and share this with a parent who needs to hear it. #ageverification #robloxupdate #parents #cybersecurity #parentingtips #digitalparenting
Are devices causing ADHD-like symptoms in your child? Clinical psychologist Dr. Carrie Mackensen joins The Family IT Guy Podcast to expose what she calls a “misdiagnosis epidemic.” Dr. Carrie explains why screen-induced ADHD looks identical to neurological ADHD — and how a 21–31 day digital detox can reveal the truth. She shares five essential digital boundaries every family needs, and how modeling healthy tech use can rebuild connection at home. In this episode: - Why kids are being misdiagnosed with ADHD, anxiety, and depression - How devices mimic neurological disorders - The power of a 4-week digital detox - Five healthy digital boundaries for families - How to strengthen the parent-child bond in a tech-driven world #FamilyITGuy #ParentingPodcast #DigitalAddiction #ADHD #ScreenTime #DigitalDetox #ParentingTips #KidsAndScreens
I'm asking Tim Cook and his team at Apple to make child safety as easy as Apple Pay. The technology already exists for schools and businesses - families just can't access it. I made an 82-page guide just to help parents set up Apple's Screen Time correctly. That's the problem. The statistics related to kids having smartphones are alarming: • Suicide rates for kids 10-14 tripled from 2007-2019 • Child exploitation reports nearly tripled from 2023 to 2024 • 2025 is on track to exceed 1 million child exploitation reports Apple's Mobile Device Management infrastructure delivers pre-configured, tamper-proof devices to schools and corporations every day. But Apple’s policy restrictions prevent families from accessing the same capability. The technology exists to protect kids from addictive algorithms and anonymous strangers. We need Apple to make it accessible to families. Share this if you would like Apple to offer tamper-proof devices to families.
456,000 sextortion reports in 2024. OpenAI's new Sora app combines 3 dangers that make this threat worse. OpenAI just released Sora, an AI video generation app being rolled out to teens. As a 30-year cybersecurity expert, I'm calling it a silver platter for predators. This video breaks down exactly why Sora is different from other social media apps and what specific dangers parents need to understand. - Why Sora's cameo feature creates permanent biometric data risks your family can't reverse - 65,000 AI-generated deepfake sextortion cases happened in 2024 - and Sora makes this worse - The 3 specific threats Sora combines (biometric data harvesting, deepfake weaponization, addictive algorithms) I spent 30 years in cybersecurity, including work with the NSA, and I'm also a dad. I understand the technical threats AND the parenting challenges. This isn't about creating fear - it's about giving you the knowledge to make informed decisions for your family. The problem isn't that your kids are bad or that you're failing as a parent. The problem is that companies design these apps asking "can we?" instead of "should we?" Once you understand these patterns, you can protect your family not just from Sora, but from the next app that comes along. View the Family IT Guy Amazon store for my recommended family-safe products https://www.amazon.com/shop/family.it.guy
Your child seems withdrawn. Device battles every day. Extreme meltdowns when you try to take their phone away. Sound familiar? If your kid has become unreachable since getting a smartphone or tablet - withdrawn from family, losing joy in activities they loved, fighting you over screen time - you're experiencing what thousands of parents are going through right now. You've probably tried taking devices away, setting new rules, drawing hard lines. And it failed. Here's the part most parents miss: Your child has been watching you on your phone since they were two years old. Sitting in their car seat, watching you scroll at stoplights. At dinner, watching you check notifications. At bedtime, seeing your phone come into your bedroom. Clinical psychologist Dr. Carrie Mackensen explains that children's brains are "associated machines" - they've been unconsciously coding in your behavior for years.This video reveals why traditional authoritarian approaches fail and what actually works: a three-strategy framework that starts with changing your own behavior first. This isn't about blaming parents - it's about understanding how behavior modeling works and using that knowledge to help your family. Research shows that collaborative approaches where parents model healthy behavior first have significantly higher success rates than authoritarian bans. View the Family IT Guy Amazon store for my recommended family-safe products https://www.amazon.com/shop/family.it.guy
Sora AI lets kids deepfake themselves with no age limits. 440K child exploitation reports in 2024. What parents must know now. OpenAI launched Sora on October 1st, and within 24 hours security experts bypassed every safety feature. Your child can download it right now and create realistic videos with their own face - no age verification, no parental consent required. Here's what you can do: knowledge plus communication equals protection. You don't need to become an AI expert, but you do need to stay informed and have real conversations with your kids about these tools - not just the exciting features they see on social media, but the serious risks that come with putting their face and voice into an AI system. My advice: Don't let your kids use AI tools like Sora alone. Supervision and education are your best defenses. View the Family IT Guy Amazon store for my recommended family-safe products https://www.amazon.com/shop/family.it.guy
Are you or your child interested in cybersecurity? Before spending $25K on a bootcamp, watch this conversation with an offensive security expert. Orlando Padilla shares brutal truths about breaking into the field - from bootcamp scams to what hiring managers actually want. In this conversation, you'll learn: - Why expensive bootcamps often fail to deliver job placement - How AI has completely changed tech hiring (and what to do about it) - How a chemistry major with no CS degree got hired - Why passion matters more than credentials in actual hiring decisions - The free resources students can use to test if this career is right for them If your family is navigating decisions about tech education, cybersecurity careers, or alternatives to traditional CS degrees, this conversation provides the insider perspective you need. About Orlando Padilla: 26 years of experience. Specializing in vulnerability research, penetration testing, and security training. Former work at Northrop Grumman and founder of multiple security companies. Has trained military and government personnel at Fort Meade. View the Family IT Guy Amazon store for my recommended family-safe products https://www.amazon.com/shop/family.it.guy
Roblox CEO claimed 'gold standard safety.' As a cybersecurity expert who tested it, here's what he didn't say on Fox News. I created an 8-year-old account with maximum parental controls active. Within 60 minutes, I found sexual content passing all filters. With 40 million children under 13 using this platform daily, every parent needs to understand what's actually happening - and why Roblox refuses to implement features that would genuinely protect kids. What I discovered: Sexual content in 'Public Bathroom Simulator' within 1 hour of testing Court-documented cases of predators using Roblox to groom teenagers Platform allows 5-year-old registration despite 12+ rating Partners with Barbie and SpongeBob to target preschoolers Deliberately won't build 'approved games only' mode like YouTube Kids has Revenue protection prioritized over child safety This video covers Roblox safety concerns, parental controls testing, online predator awareness, children's gaming safety, and why tech companies prioritize engagement over protection. Essential viewing for parents of kids interested in or currently playing Roblox. If this information helped you understand the risks better, please share it with other parents. Subscribe for more evidence-based digital safety guidance. View the Family IT Guy Amazon store for my recommended family-safe products https://www.amazon.com/shop/family.it.guy
Sarah (Mom Uncharted) went from following momfluencers to becoming one of the "watchdog moms of TikTok" with 300K+ followers. She reveals what most parents don't know about the real cost of sharing children online. Sarah's awakening moment: "I was following a momfluencer who shared her child's medical diagnosis, hospitals, doctors, appointments. And I realized - I shouldn't know this. This is too far." That realization led her down a rabbit hole that revealed platform suppression, AI threats, and business models designed to exploit our children. Topics discussed: - Why Mom Uncharted got shadowbanned after CNN called her a "watchdog mom" - The moment a regular mom realized sharenting had gone too far - Three problems with sharenting every parent should understand - Why Big Tech suppresses child safety advocates - What happens when your teenager Googles themselves - The new AI app that looks like TikTok but threatens every photo - Why you should model healthy tech boundaries for your kids View the Family IT Guy Amazon store for my recommended family-safe products https://www.amazon.com/shop/family.it.guy
Your teen's midnight scrolling isn't a discipline problem, it's a sleep deprivation crisis making them vulnerable to predators, bullying, and addictive algorithms. When your teenager has a device in their bedroom at night, four critical dangers emerge: 1. Fatigue destroys judgment - tired teens share information and engage with strangers they normally wouldn't 2. Isolation eliminates protection - when bullying happens at midnight, there's no escape 3. Predators specifically target late night hours when kids are alone, tired, and vulnerable 4. Algorithms exploit exhaustion - tired brains are more susceptible to addictive content The research is clear: Psychologist Jonathan Haidt documents this in The Anxious Generation. Sleep experts universally recommend it. Parents who implement this report better sleep, fewer emotional crises, less risky behavior, and improved mental health. One rule eliminates all these risks: No devices in bedrooms—for anyone in the family. RECOMMENDED PRODUCTS: Charging station: https://amzn.to/47KN6hm and cables: https://amzn.to/4hIZwe9 Seiko alarm clock: https://amzn.to/3WExTt6 View the Family IT Guy Amazon store for other recommended family-safe products https://www.amazon.com/shop/family.it.guy
Remember when you could just "log off"? Your kids can't. The internet you grew up with and the one they're navigating are worlds apart. You survived AOL chat rooms. You navigated the early internet just fine. But here's the uncomfortable truth: that experience doesn't prepare you for what your kids face today. Not because you weren't capable then—but because the internet itself has fundamentally changed. WHAT ACTUALLY CHANGED: Then: You had to ask permission to use the family computer Now: The internet is in your child's pocket 24/7 Then: You heard that dial-up sound when connecting Now: Silent, constant access with no "logging off" Then: Your parents could walk by and see the screen Now: Private devices, encrypted apps, hidden content Then: Websites were static pages you chose to visit Now: AI algorithms study every click and serve addictive content Then: Chat rooms had 10-20 strangers Now: Anonymous access to millions of people worldwide Then: The internet was a destination you visited Now: It follows your child everywhere, constantly pulling their attention back This isn't about your parenting skills. It's about understanding that a neighborhood street and a six-lane highway require completely different safety rules. THE THREE MYTHS: MYTH #1: "I survived the early internet, my kid will be fine" This is like saying you crossed a quiet street safely, so your kid will be fine crossing a freeway at rush hour. The internet had no algorithms tracking your behavior in the 90s. Today's platforms use artificial intelligence to study your child's every move and serve them exactly what keeps them scrolling. You could log off. Your kids can't escape. MYTH #2: "The government and platforms will protect my kids" Who makes money when your kid stays on TikTok for another hour? TikTok does. Who gets campaign donations from tech companies? Politicians do. Frances Haugen testified to Congress with internal documents proving Instagram knew their platform harmed teenage mental health—and they buried the research to protect profits. Right now, 40% of children aged 8-12 are using social media illegally. The biggest fine the FTC ever gave? $5.7 million to TikTok - a rounding error. These companies aren't on your team. MYTH #3: "Platforms will moderate harmful content" When the product is free, your child's attention is what's being sold to advertisers. Keeping your kid safe means less time on the platform. Less time means less money. Their business model and your child's safety are opposing goals. This is why every dangerous platform is free—TikTok, Snapchat, Roblox, Fortnite. And every safer platform costs money—Nintendo Switch, Minecraft. When you pay, you're the customer. When it's free, your child's attention is the product. THE TWO DANGERS THAT MATTER: After 30 years in cybersecurity (including work at the NSA) and raising my own kid, I've learned that most of the complexity boils down to TWO core dangers: 1. Addictive algorithms - AI designed by psychologists to capture and keep your child's attention 2. Anonymous communication - Strangers having access to your child without accountability Every dangerous platform has one or both of these. Every safer platform has neither or has strong protections against them. Once you understand these two dangers, you don't need to become a tech expert. You don't need to learn every new app. You can evaluate TikTok, Roblox, Snapchat, or whatever launches next month using the same framework. WHAT YOU CAN DO RIGHT NOW: The skills you developed navigating the early internet - critical thinking, stranger danger awareness, healthy skepticism - those are still valuable. But they need to be updated for an internet that: - Never turns off - Studies your child to manipulate them - Connects them to millions of anonymous strangers - Makes money by keeping them addicted You don't need to understand algorithms. You need to have ongoing conversations with your kids about these two dangers and why they matter. https://www.familyitguy.com/assets/downloads/safe-chat-conversation-starters.html KEY TAKEAWAY: Your parents' advice about internet safety was "don't talk to strangers online." That's still true. But today you also need to teach your kids about how platforms are designed to be addictive and why "free" apps are actually the most expensive - they cost attention, mental health, and safety. Keep your kids away from addictive algorithms and anonymous communication. Teach them why these dangers exist. That's 90% of online safety right there.
Meta's internal research proved Instagram harms teen mental health. Whistleblowers testified they suppressed the evidence. 42 states sued over addictive design. Now Instagram announces PG-13 ratings—while changing none of the features their own research identified as harmful. - 2021: Frances Haugen leaks Meta internal research: "We make body image issues worse for 1 in 3 teen girls" - Meta's research showed the problem was NOT content ratings but comparison mechanics, infinite scroll, algorithmic feeds, and validation systems - September 2025: Four whistleblowers testify Meta systematically suppressed research, used vague language, and destroyed evidence about child solicitation - October 2023: 42 state attorneys general sue Meta for designing Instagram to addict children and deliberately misleading the public - 2025: Instagram announces content filtering—the only change that doesn't reduce engagement or revenue When a platform's revenue depends on maximizing user engagement, safety features that reduce engagement become business threats. Content filtering is the only change Instagram can make that doesn't impact their core business model—which is why it's the only change they're making, despite their own research showing it doesn't address the architectural features causing harm.
Roblox announced 100 safety updates, but do they fix the fundamental problem? Here's what every parent needs to know. You may have heard about Roblox's new safety updates and wondered: "Does this finally make it safe for my kids?" You're not alone. With 40 million children under 13 playing Roblox every day, understanding what these updates actually address—and what they don't—is critical for making informed decisions about your family's safety. I'm Ben Gillenwater, the Family IT Guy. I've spent 30 years in cybersecurity, including time at the NSA, and I'm also a dad navigating these same challenges. In this video, I break down what Roblox's new safety updates are and I explain the fundamental architecture problem that no update can solve. WHAT YOU'LL LEARN: - Why user-generated content platforms are fundamentally incompatible with child safety - The missing feature that YouTube Kids has but Roblox refuses to implement - How free gaming platforms create conflicts between your child's safety and company revenue - Why Roblox partners with preschool brands despite being rated for ages 12+ - What action you can take to protect not just your family but create broader change Roblox's safety updates treat symptoms, not the core problem. The platform's architecture—millions of user-generated games combined with anonymous social features—is fundamentally incompatible with child safety. Understanding this helps you make better decisions not just about Roblox, but about any platform your children want to use. This isn't about being anti-technology. It's about understanding how these platforms are designed and whether that design aligns with your family's values and your children's developmental needs. GET MORE KIDS INTERNET SAFETY GUIDANCE: Subscribe for practical, parent-friendly guides on keeping kids safe online Visit FamilyITGuy.com for step-by-step instructions on parental controls across all major platforms SHARE WITH OTHER PARENTS: If this helped you understand the issues more clearly, share it with other parents in your community. The more families understand these patterns, the more pressure we can put on platforms to prioritize safety over engagement.
If your child has a smartphone, they're likely to encounter serious risks. School Resource Officer Gomez shares what he's seeing with cell phone addiction and practical strategies that help families respond. Officer Gomez is a deputy and school resource officer who works directly with students and families navigating these challenges daily. What he's witnessing: 100% of teenage boys will be propositioned for sextortion. Kids offering sex for cell phone access. Teens arrested for crimes who prioritize saving their Snapchat streaks. Children whose ideal weekend is "locked in my room on social media all weekend long." This isn't just your child. This isn't your parenting. This is addiction by design. Officer Gomez provides the crisis response framework, family communication strategies, and preventive measures that help families regain control and restore connection. IN THIS CONVERSATION: The Addiction Truth: Why cell phone addiction mirrors substance abuse patterns—and what that means for your family Sextortion Reality: How boys with internet access become targets Crisis Response Protocol: Steps to take when you discover sextortion, inappropriate content, or concerning behavior The Tribal Council Method: How to respond as a family team instead of treating your child as "broken" Age 16 Recommendation: Why waiting to give smartphones matters and how to explain it School Chromebook Reality: Why "you can have cell phones or education, not both" and what parents can do The Off-Grid Family: Real example of kids thriving without technology—dirty, adventurous, and genuinely happy Two-Hour Rule: Realistic screen time management with monitoring strategies Mental Health Conversation: Why everyone needs support and how to normalize getting help National Center for Missing & Exploited Children: 1-800-THE-LOST CONNECT WITH OFFICER GOMEZ: https://www.facebook.com/deputygomez/about https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCXkte-5lPIcRHLvvEtYOB2A This conversation covers difficult topics including sextortion, addiction, and mental health. It's designed to empower parents with practical knowledge and tools. Officer Gomez speaks with both professional authority and parental humility—he's been through these challenges as both a law enforcement officer and a dad. Share this if you know parents navigating digital safety concerns. Subscribe for more conversations on digital safety, parenting in the tech age, and practical solutions from experts working with families.
Sora represents the convergence of everything that concerns me about technology and kids. OpenAI released Sora as an "AI video creation tool," but the actual product tells a different story. It's a social network with: - Vertical scrolling feeds (TikTok model) - AI-powered algorithmic recommendations - Stranger interaction through comments, likes and direct messages - Video remixing features using other users' content and likenesses - Self-reported age verification with zero actual verification From a security standpoint, this combines addictive algorithm design with anonymous communication channels—the two highest-risk factors for young people online. OpenAI is projected to lose $8 billion in 2024. They won't be profitable until 2029. When a company hemorrhaging money gives away cutting-edge technology cheaply and adds social features, ask: What (or who) is the actual product? Answer: User data. Every video created, every prompt typed, every interaction feeds their AI training models. In Sora's case, that includes children's faces, voices, creative patterns, and behavioral data. Kids should not be early adopters of AI technologies. These companies are experimenting with business models, and your kid's data is part of that experiment. If your children use AI at all, it should be supervised 100% of the time. You should know: - What they're creating or consuming - Who they're interacting with - What data is being collected - How that data will be used