Tis the season to be jolly.... And, stressed, overwhelmed, and exhausted! So, how do you get through this time of year without arriving at Christmas collapsing in a heap? Join me for the pep talk you likely need right now!
For most of us, our life time will included moments of crisis - illness, injury, death, sudden loss, a natural disaster... It's a given that our mental health is going to take a hit when we are facing a crisis. But, there are lots of things you can do to lessen the impact and survive through these times well. Join me for this episode where I explore some tips for taking take of your mental health when facing a crisis.
Having challenging relationships with family members is far more common than we acknowledge within our society, and can be a source of significant pain and grief for many people. It's also really tough knowing what to do to navigate these relationships - no contact, disappointment, boundaries etc. Come and join me for this (quite chunky!) episode where I share some advice around this topic.
In the last episode, I shared all about the important skill of navigating having time away from your children without that annoying parenting guilt overwhelming you. In this episode, I focus on guilt about your parenting - how do we manage to avoid the trap of berating ourselves around what we did or didn't do... This episode is filled with lots of different insights, and I hope there is something for everyone!
So, you went to antenatal class and they talked about birth and what to dress your baby in, but did they talk about the incredible guilt that most parents battle throughout their journey as parents? I doubt it! Join me for this episode - part one - where I explore parenting guilt, particularly around time away from your children. Whether this is for work, working out, hobbies, time with friends, or relationship time, being able to respond to your own needs is a pretty important part of being an emotionally regulated parent. Join me for this episode where I share some tips, tricks and insights around parenting guilt when it comes to time away from your kids.
In this episode, I answer some listener questions in follow up to the recent episode on workaholism as a trauma response. The questions I respond to are: - How do you get beyond 'eldest child syndrome' and constantly being the overly responsible one in a work setting? - What about picking up too many unpaid responsibilities - how does that busyness relate to trauma? - How do I manage working from home better as a workaholic? - I work in an industry where workaholism is expected - what do I do in this context?
In this episode I explore the links I see as a therapist between workaholism and trauma - whether this is major trauma or ways of being we learn for our own safety. This episode is designed to get you thinking about the potential dynamics driving your workaholism, if this is a challenge you face.
I'm a big believer in the power parents have to positively shape their child's mental health over the course of their life. But, where do you start? In this episode I share some key areas you can focus on to teach your child some important mental health fundamentals.
Well, my friends, it's time to get WAYYYYYY beyond the answers we give to the supermarket cashier when it comes to "How are you?". When we are asked how we are, we are so conditioned to respond with "Ok" and "Good", no matter how we are really feeling. So, in this episode I share with you a few key questions to get you reflecting on how you really are. Also, you can download my free 'How are you really' reflection guide at charlottecummings.nz, which is the perfect companion to this episode :) This episode is in proud partnership with Natalie, Gala, and the lovely Millo team, in recognition of New Zealand's Mental Health Awareness Week, which begins on 23rd September. Our Millo foam loungers are one of the BEST additions to our house, and a top tool we have for emotion regulation in our family. You can get 20% off anytime with the code 'goingsandcummings'. Check them out: millo.org.nz
In this episode, I share some advice on helping your child transition to school, with a particular focus around reducing anxiety.
Well, according to you guys, this is going to be a great episode! I know there are people who have been hanging out for this one... Parenting is essentially a trauma for a relationship. You are never again the same person you were before children + the demands of parenting are high and ongoing. It's tough! Come and join me for this episode, where I share some ideas on how you can look after your relationship through the years with young kids!
I get asked this question so, so often and I have LOTS of tips to share. It's time to take it away from being a black and white/yes or no question of "Will you come to therapy with me?", and ask way better questions to get you both participating in therapy quick smart!
This is a bit of a different episode - it's all about me! I share my back story, more about my counselling style, my work as a Private Investigator, my issues - it's all here! haha.. Come join me for a yarn!
This is a follow up episode to Episode 60 on boundaries. In this episode, I respond to a range of listener questions on how to apply boundaries in different contexts - with difficult people, fragile people, in a not for profit work setting, with kids, with in laws, when supporting someone else through a difficult time, and as a grandparent. Phew! There is lots in here, and no doubt there will be something relevant to a challenge you face.
Join me for this episode, all about the important topic of boundaries. I'm a big believer that if you don't have good boundaries, you don't end up living your own life - and, instead, you live the life others construct for you. Boundaries are a really important life skill, yet for many people, the state of their mental health prevents them from even knowing what they want - let alone holding a boundary. I hope you get lots from this episode, and don't forget to check out the following episode (61) where I answer listener questions on boundaries.
I hear this all of the time from people writing to me seeking to engage in counselling... "I just feel I have lost myself, and I've lost my way". The good news is that you're not a $20 note in last winter's jacket, and there are actually steps you can take to re-discover, re-invent, or re-connect with who you are. Join me for this episode where I explore how to go about this process.
Well, this is a bit of a different episode today, as I share a conversation I had with my friend Steph over on her podcast Style for Life. I met Steph in her role as a stylist when she did my colours in a mall. Since then she's shopped with me, taught me to run, shared so much with me about nutrition and exercise, and now she is an ever-inspiring woman in my world. EVERYONE needs a Steph. Working with her has been a part of my own journey of learning to love and appreciate myself. We chat about self-esteem, health, looking after yourself, the vagus nerve, clothes, parenting - pretty much everything. I hope you enjoy listening in to our chat!
Have you heard the saying, "Parenting is a walk in the park, only it's Jurassic Park"? Anxiety about our children's health, development, and activities can be really challenging. In this episode I explore some key ideas for managing your experience of anxiety in the context of parenting.
Responding well to people who err towards negativity can be tough - whether these characters in your life are friends, family members or colleagues. In this episode I respond to a listener question with tips for dealing with negative people - ways to manage the relationship, a challenge around what this pushes for you personally, and how to guard your own precious energy through it all.
For many of us, there are things we would like to change - perhaps around our health, around our style of relating to others, or personal habits. But, the process of change can be really hard. In this episode, I share some encouragement and reminders for you if you've got something you're working on right now. This might be the little boost you need :)