Find love after 40 with Renée Suzanne

It really sucks to put your best foot forward, get on a dating app and start chatting with guys and then have them send you an inappropriate picture.It’s awful and beyond disrespectful.It infuriates me that men do this and if this has happened to you, I’m so sorry.People really should treat each other better than this.But before you delete your dating apps and swear off dating and/or men, I want you to hear me out.I’m going to talk about why this happens and how you can shut it down.Online dating can be a depersonalizing experience, just like being in traffic. We treat each other much worse in traffic than we would walking on the sidewalk.Dating apps are a lot like this. We all tend to forget there are actual humans behind those pixels. So do your best to remember and not take this personally. It’s human nature.I still want you to block and delete men who do this, but don’t take it personally or swear off the apps.Now let’s talk about my best tips for making sure you never experience this again.Make sure your profile is PG rated. You can show a little cleavage and look good, but no bikini shots or showing too much skin. You can save those kinds of things for when he’s your boyfriend. Pictures like this tend to attract the wrong kind of attention.This extends to what you write in your profile. Nothing suggestive. No talk of massages or anything steamy.When men send you messages or texts, they often start to test the waters by being flirty or suggestive. If you tolerate this it tends to escalate and that’s when they start sending this stuff. I suggest you shut it down immediately if there’s anything suggestive happening in those early messages. If this resonates with you, I want you to go to bit.ly/ForeverMan or  click here to apply or for a call with me where we’ll create your very own custom man plan to help you get into the kind of relationship you really want.

Sushi, oysters, BBQ joints, hookah bars, how to connect with random people and have conversations, how to appreciate men, even men I’d never see again.Running around the city in my heels meeting random men who opened doors for me, bought me dinners and drinks, sometimes showed up drunk and tried to kiss me on first dates, and often broke my heart taught me so much.Thank you to all the men who taught me how to do this and spending a few hours and some (or a lot) of your hard earned money to get to know me.Sometimes I was an entitled brat. Most of the time, I needed to get over myself and realize that I was not the hottest thing on Match.com either.Sometimes I wasn’t as nice as I should have been. Sometimes the guys weren’t either.But I learned so much from my journey and I’m grateful for all of it.As difficult, awkward and downright painful as it was, I’d do it all over again twice just to be with my husband today.He is so worth it.I’m so grateful for everything I learned, including how to connect with other humans in a non-transactional way.Top things I learned: How to get over myself (I’m still working on this one) How to prioritize what’s really important and what is not How to ask the right questions How to set boundaries How to love myself and what that really means  I really was not the hottest thing on Match.comI have a great resource to help you write an amazing profile so that you can find a quality man ASAP.Click here to download it or go to bit.ly/gr8profile

If you have children, you’ve probably experienced entitlement.It can be maddening, but it’s part of growing up and hopefully it passes.But I see a lot of entitlement in the dating space.I think the prevalence of Disney movies, romance novels, TV and chick flicks contribute to this.We know these things are just entertainment and we don’t consciously mean to internalize them the way we do, but it’s clear to me that a lot of us feel entitled to things that just aren’t realistic.A wonderful romantic relationship with the man of your dreams is one of the most amazing things you can experience in this world, but it is not your birthright, no more than winning the lottery, the olympics or being a CEO is your birthright.These things may be possible for you with work and persistence, but you are not entitled to them simply for existing.And in case you haven’t noticed, most people don’t have these things.What you’re going for is kind of a big deal.Now, I happen to think that having a wonderful romantic relationship is one of the easier things to get (compared to winning the lottery or the olympics) but it’s still going to involve some work. Probably a lot. I suggest that if you really want to experience this, you make your peace with it and roll up your sleeves.Things you think you’re entitled to but aren’t:Meeting the love of your life with ease It’s work to go out and meet people. It takes time and effort. And they’re not all going to be amazing or interested in dating you and that’s ok.Having a hassle-free dating experienceDrama and hardship can be minimized by learning basic dating skills, but it can’t be completely avoided. You will have bad phone calls/dates/experiences. You will get stood up, ghosted and pull in a few wingnuts. You are playing a big game here and this is the price of admission. Don’t go to pieces when these things happen. They are normal. You are a grown woman and you are going to be ok. Dust yourself off and keep going for what you want in this world. Finding a guy who has all of the qualities you desire who also wants to date youIf your list is on the long side (more than 10 traits) and has superficial qualities on it (like height, income, fitness level) you will likely get 70-90% of what you want. Make sure it’s the RIGHT 70-90%. Holding out longer is generally a terrible idea because time is not your friend in the over 40 dating space. A man who checks all the boxes perfectlyHe calls in advance, always makes a reservation to a fabulous restaurant, buys you flowers, is attentive but not clingy, and generally reads your mind. These men don’t exist. Start working on aligning your expectations with reality.Having a perfect relationship without effortEven when you find a great guy there will always be some work involved. And that’s ok.I’m not trying to scold you here. I KNOW how hard it is out there and my heart goes out to you. Dating is not for the faint of heart and you will get your butt kicked sometimes. I want to normalize this experience for you so that you won’t lose heart or quit when the going gets tough because it will.And when it does, I want you to remember that this is 100% normal. Nothing has gone wrong. Your guy is still out there looking for you and likely going through his own struggles. If you keep showing up, he’ll be able to find you and you’ll both be so glad.I don’t want you to think for a second that any of these things means that it’s not meant to be for you. Love is meant to be for you, simply because you want it. And you will for sure get what you want if you keep learning from these experiences and don’t give up.It’ll be a lot easier for you if you question all your beliefs about what you’re entitled to.I have a great resource to help you write an amazing profile so that you can find a quality man ASAP.Click here to download it or go to bit.ly/gr8profile

Most of us want to feel an emotional connection with the person we’re dating. If things feel as bland as a piece of dry toast, your relationship is not likely to last.But sometimes we cross the line into Drama Central, where we expect every exchange to be a heated declaration of emotional connection, a confession of vulnerability, trials or deep dark secrets. We sometimes bond over our traumas and life’s tribulations, especially if we didn’t have the most amazing upbringing, and so many of us didn’t. It’s easy to wind up telling men things we shouldn’t and/or allowing them to use our dates as therapy sessions.It all feels so intense, like you’re really bonding and creating a meaningful connection but this is not healthy.Want proof? Think about the last few relationships you had emotional intensity in. All the fireworks, passion and drama. The confessions of feelings, all the stuff.What happened? Where are these guys now? Did those emotional experiences create the lasting bond you were hoping for?What wins the day in healthy relationships are consistent, predictable connections over time. Having someone in your life who is responsible, someone you can count on.Now think about your best friend. Do you have crazy emotional intensity with them? It’s unlikely that you do. You’re more likely to describe a stable relationship where you feel safe, heard, and understood.Our nervous systems don’t respond well to constant upheaval and constant upheaval doesn’t create healthy relationships.When it comes to a healthy relationship, slow and steady wins out over fast and intense. If your relationships tend to go up in smoke pretty much before they begin, this might be why.Instead of focusing on intensity, try getting to know new men gradually and letting the connection build.It will feel weird at first, but this is how a healthy connection develops.If this resonates with you, click here to apply for a call with me where we’ll create your very own custom man plan to help you get into the kind of relationship you really want.

If you’ve been single for longer than a year or so I can pretty much guarantee you that your situation is not a product of just not having met the right guy. You are looking at a mindset gap or a skill gap, and most likely both. Unless you address these things, you are likely to not only remain single, but create and intensify unhealthy dating patterns and it will get harder as you age. Continuing to hope that you just run into the right guy one of these days or that love will just happen to you is a terrible plan. Creating and sustaining a healthy relationship requires much more skill than luck, so I suggest you start building those skills now. Work and change will be required, but it’s the only way forward. The reason for this is that good relationships don’t happen to us, they are built. We are the ones who are responsible for building them, one day at a time, one conversation at a time. You have to start with the right kind of person, but in order to do that, you have to have the skills to present yourself well, vet the men you date and resist the temptation to look outside of yourself for the “perfect man” to show up and create an instant relationship with you. It simply doesn’t work that way. The dating process, showing up, talking to men, going on dates, vetting men, communicating with them, setting boundaries and standing for your must-haves are all part of this. Those are the things that make you able to have the kind of relationship you really want. If you cut corners on these things, you won’t be able to create a healthy relationship no matter who you meet. You’ll pass on good men for the exciting ones who will turn out not to be the answer. You are the answer, not the guy. You are the one who is going to have to do this. And you can.  It requires getting your reps in and building the skills to vet men and have healthy relationships. There’s no shortcut, but building these skills is the quickest way to get what you really want out there. It’s kind of like training for a marathon or getting stronger in the gym. You get your reps in and build your strength. And then you get to enjoy the results. I have a great resource to help you find a quality man ASAP. Click here to get instant access or go to bit.ly/MANPLAN

I remember telling one of my friends that I didn’t really think I was going to meet a great guy online. I was just “duty dating” and she responded that she didn’t feel that way at all. She actually expected to meet great guys. And she did! She had a blast with online dating while I trudged around like a deflated balloon constantly getting disappointed. So who was right? We both were. We got what we expected. What do you expect from online dating and apps? Answer this question because it really matters. And if your expectations are awful, I want you to know that it absolutely can have a huge impact on your experience with these platforms. Expect to do well, expect that your man is out there. (He is! Where else would he be???) If you’re anything like me, you’re probably thinking that you already know from experience that this stuff doesn’t work. And my answer is, why are you trying then? Why are you listening to this podcast or doing any of it? It’s because you want to find your guy. In order for that to actually happen, you have to work on your attitude. I promise you it helps. My friend and I are both married today, to guys we met on the apps. I made a lot of changes to get where I am today and now it’s so obvious to me how my attitude made things so much harder. If you are feeling discouraged with dating, it absolutely is affecting your results out there. This is where coaching can really help you turn things around. I have a great resource to help you write an amazing profile so that you can find a quality man ASAP. Click here to get instant access or go to bit.ly/gr8profile

If you’re hoping that your luck will change when it comes to dating, I get it. I spent many years hoping for the same thing. After all, what else are women supposed to do? Isn’t something terribly wrong with you if you need to actually do anything proactive to find love?Well, I finally decided to call BS on that idea and I hope you will too. Because hope is not getting you the results you want. Hope, without the action to back it up, is completely useless. I want you to supplement your hope by taking action on your own behalf by making a strategy and implementing it.  This is your one and only life, at least as far as we know for sure, so I want you to make it count. If sharing your life with a man who adores you is important to you, it’s go time. I don’t want you wasting one more minute on hope without taking some action to back it up. Your dreams are too important to offload to just hoping they happen. And the saddest thing of all is that the longer you wait to do something besides hope, the harder it becomes. So don’t wait.  If you don’t have an actual strategy, create one today. Reach out to me and I will help you.Remember, it needs to involve actually meeting men, not just lighting candles or buying an extra night stand. You need to be meeting new men, interacting with them, vetting them for a relationship and troubleshooting anything that gets in the way of doing these things. I have a great resource to help you write an amazing profile so that you can find a quality man ASAP. Click here to get instant access or go to bit.ly/gr8profile

I have a friend who will remain nameless, but it’s someone that I know in real life so don’t think I’m calling any of you ladies out. This friend is super smart, but lost her spouse a few years ago in a horrible way and ended up a single parent with a full-time job. It was pretty awful.  She soon met someone in real life who was recently divorced, much younger and had a young child. a very tumultuous on again off again relationship ensued. This person was totally wrong for her, but was super attractive, could’ve passed for a model, all the things we all think we want. But the relationship was very unhealthy with constant drama, and she ultimately saw this and ended it permanently. I was really worried that my friend was going to Alpha widow this guy, but she didn’t.  What she did blew my mind: she went on a dating app, met a more age appropriate guy who didn’t look like a model and they’re in a happy relationship now. She had a very painful experience, but she learned from it and is in a better place today.  Contrast this with me and my own dating experience, which might be more similar to yours. I kept trying to date the elusive and attractive, alpha males. I never wanted the guys who wanted me, and the guys I wanted didn’t want me. I kept at this for years and years without trying very hard at all to change my ways.  I thought if I just got the right manifestation techniques or the right fairy dust or bought enough lipgloss or whatever that I would finally get this kind of guy to want me, but it never happened.  I did this for decades.  So don’t be like me. Use the feedback you’re getting from your dating experience. Instead of going for the same 10% or so of guys on the dating apps that won’t give you the time of day, interact with the ones who are reaching out to you.  Give them a chance. Go on dates. Don’t kill yourself that, these alpha types are ever going to want to date you. If they do, it is likely to be a brief and painful experience like it was for me and my friend.  If you have been single for longer than a year or two and constantly disappointed this applies to you. Stop telling yourself that you can’t change your preferences. Because if you don’t learn how to do this, you will end up alone. Time is not your friend. You can skip to the good part, just like she did. If you’re stuck on how to do this, I can help. Go to bit.ly/ForeverMan to apply for my coaching program. I have a great resource to help you create your very own custom man plan so that you can find a quality man ASAP. Click here to download it or go to bit.ly/MANPLAN

Back in my single days, my favorite flavor of dating dysfunction was pining away for men who didn’t want to date me.I was so adept at lying to myself that I spent years nursing crushes on these men.  I was convinced that they would come around. They’d see how perfect we were for each other and that I was such a catch. My feelings were what mattered, not theirs. Obviously because we were perfect for each other! They would have to wake up to reality sooner or later right? Well, not so much. And honestly, I can’t blame them! What do you think of men who won’t take no for an answer and go on about how perfect you are for each other when you don’t want to date them? It’s not pretty is it? So if you are indulging in this behavior, I want you to stop immediately. He is not perfect for you because he doesn’t want to date you. The thought that he is perfect for you is an absolute lie, a poisonous fiction that is literally destroying your chances of finding love. It is my belief that one of the reasons I did this is because it helped me to maintain the illusion that I was romantically involved with someone without participating in an actual relationship or taking any risk by putting myself out into the world of dating. Consider if that rings true for you. What benefit do you get from indulging in fantasies about men who aren’t interested in dating you? Can you see what an absolute waste of time this is? If you, like me, are extra stubborn, it’s time for an intervention.I want you to seriously consider reaching out to me for coaching, because I can help you get into a real relationship. Go to bit.ly/ForeverMan to apply for my coaching program.If you’re not ready to do that yet, here are some tips to DIY this.Whenever you have the thought that he is perfect for you, write down the reasons he is not. Reason #1 is that he has not asked you out/told you he only wants FWB, whatever the real situation is that you are hoping isn’t really true. Men’s actions speak louder than words. Has he asked you out on a date? Is he treating you like his dream girl? If not, it’s because he doesn’t want to. Remind yourself of the facts instead of making excuses for him. If he has actually told you that he doesn’t want to date you or only wants casual, believe him. Men do not say these things to women they want to date. Remind yourself of this until you break the habit of believing he is perfect for you. A man who doesn’t want to date you is NOT perfect for you by definition. The thought that he is perfect for you is just a thought error. It’s like a bug in a computer program that just needs to be fixed. It’s up to you to fix it, but you can. Every thought that runs through your mind is not necessarily true, so learn to question thoughts that aren’t helpful. Question them, challenge them and change them into thoughts that are more helpful. This requires work, but the rewards are so amazing. I have a great resource to help you write an amazing profile so that you can find a quality man ASAP. Click here to download it or go to bit.ly/gr8profile

Have you ever stopped seeing a man because you were afraid of leading him on? What exactly does it really mean to lead a man on? I asked the Googles, and what I found was very interesting. Leading someone on is sending mixed signals, deliberately giving a false impression of romantic interest, excessive friendliness or flirting with no intention of pursuing a romantic relationship, seeking validation or avoiding honest conversations. My guess is that you would not intentionally do any of these things because you are a decent human being. Continuing to see a man you’re uncertain about in order to give him a chance to grow on you is NOT leading a man on, it is giving a connection a chance to develop. When you stop seeing a man who’s excited about you because you’re afraid of leading him on, you could very well be sabotaging your chances of getting into a good relationship at all. This is because the best relationships tend to be the ones where the man is more excited about the woman and is motivated to move the relationship forward. He’s willing to do the work to get it off the ground. Since there are 2 people in the relationship, it stands to reason that one of them will be the more excited one, and it works better when it’s the man. If the only guys you ever give a chance to are the ones who aren’t as excited as you are, you’re shooting yourself in the foot. So what should you do?I recommend continuing to see men who do not display red flags and that you have some level of attraction toward. This can generally be a 4 and above on a scale of 1-10.  You don’t find them seriously unattractive, you’re just not quite sure.This is not disingenuous, it’s just giving a chance for a connection to develop over time, which often can happen. You don’t need to be blinded by lust within minutes of meeting a man for him to be a real contender.There’s no need to lead a man on or be dishonest. You can be kind, open and friendly.  Men actually enjoy having the opportunity to court a woman and win her when they are excited about her.We all want a man to woo us and win us, and in order to do so we need to let him stay around long enough to do so.  The men who aren’t excited about you are never going to do this, so you need to be open to the men who are. It’s way more fun once you get used to it. I have a great resource to help you write an amazing profile so that you can find a quality man ASAP. Click here to download it or go to bit.ly/gr8profile

Do you think dating is a waste of time? I sure used to. It all seemed so futile.  Year after year would slip by and all I’d have to show for it was another heartbreak or 2 if I’d managed to meet anyone I was interested in at all. You cannot afford to spend your time this way. It’s time to make some changes. Time is not your friend as a single woman. I know this is harsh, but I'm not here to blow smoke at you and tell you fairytales.If you want a great guy, it’s only going to get harder, so stop wasting your time asap. Here are the top ways I see women wasting their time in dating. Not giving good guys a chance. You think you’re saving time by cutting them off early, but you’re shooting yourself in the foot. Staying with the wrong guys too long. A man who is not in love with you or doesn’t share your relationship goals is a waste of time. Get rid of him. Hiding and calling it healing. You need to be out meeting and dating men. When you take time off and don’t do anything with it or learn from what you’ve been through, you’re likely to repeat the same patterns the next time you date. Time alone doesn’t help anything. It’s like pausing in the middle of remodeling your house. When you come back, nothing has improved. Waiting for the “right time”. There is no perfect time to do this. The right time is when you decide you want someone to share your life with. It gets harder the longer you wait. Holding out for your prince. I see so many women holding out for a fantasy of a man who does not exist. What exactly are you hoping for? Do you know anyone like this in real life? If so, why aren’t you dating him? I want you to answer these questions. If you’re doing any of these things, you’re not alone. But if you want to find a great guy, you’ll need to make some changes. I can help you do this in 2025.  Click here to learn more about my coaching program.

I’m willing to bet anything that you’re scrolling past good guys all the time on the apps. You’re overlooking these men in favor of who you think you should be dating, but those guys never work out. No you don’t have to have a certain type. Have you noticed that those guys never work out? Why would you tell yourself that story? Stop it now if you want a man in your life anytime soon. Most women on these apps are trying to date the same 10% of guys and overlooking the rest. There are good men on dating apps and they are looking for you. But you’re: Scrolling past them in favor of the flashy guys Dumping them because they aren’t your type Not giving them a chance because you don’t feel chemistry right away Blowing them off because they come off as needy, desperate or get too excited about you It isn’t working. These guys you think you should be dating aren’t giving you the time of day. They’re non-commital at best and flat out ignoring you at worst. And you’re wasting years telling yourself there are no good men on these apps, but they are right in front of you. They have bad pictures, dad bods and aren’t smooth professional daters, but they are good men. You need to look at this differently in order to find them and have a relationship with one. I’m hosting a free class to help you do this in 2025.  It's called “The Ultimate Dating Plan” and it’s taking place on January 6 at 7PM Central. You need to be there if you want to find a great guy. You can sign up here or go to https://reneesuzannecoaching.com/datingplan

You need to get real about what dating looks like after 40 so that you can have a fighting chance at getting into a real relationship with a good guy. This isn’t an easy thing to do after 40, but we tend to make it even harder by not facing the reality of what dating and relationships look like at this life stage. When you expect it to look like it did in your 20’s (even though nothing else does!) you are in for a rough ride. If you want to find a good man out there, you’ll benefit massively from aligning your priorities with what you really want. So instead of prioritizing a man’s height, looks, swagger, excitement level, think about the kind of relationship you really want, how you want to feel with this man. Then, consider the qualities a man would need to possess to be able to participate in this kind of relationship and prioritize those qualities instead. A good shortcut for this is to think about your best friends. What qualities do they possess? What do you like about them? You’re much more likely to have a good relationship with a man who has these qualities instead of the more flashy, exciting ones. Excitement is one of the most overrated qualities when it comes to dating. I want you to date boring and make the rest of your life exciting. Date predictable men whose words and actions match, men you can count on.  Date the nice guy with the dad bod who worships you instead of the gym rat who’s trying to seduce all the women in his yoga class. Date the man with a kid and a regular job instead of the exciting executive who never has time for you. I’m hosting a free class to help you do this in 2025.  It's called “The Ultimate Dating Plan” and it’s taking place on January 6 at 7PM Central. You need to be there if you want to find a great guy. You can ⁠sign up here⁠ or go to ⁠https://reneesuzannecoaching.com/datingplan

In order to find a good guy out there, you have to do something to make it happen. I want you to give up on the myth that it’s going to just happen one of these days and get to work. Stop believing things like:Love happens when you least expect it It happens when it is meant to be It will happen if it’s meant to happen You’ll just go about your business and see what happens. That might work when you’re younger and surrounded by single age appropriate men but it’s terrible advice when you’re in your 40s and up, so cut it out. You need to be meeting new men regularly and the best way to do that is to get on a dating app. So just freaking do it. And do it with a great profile and work on your dating skills.If you’re hoping to just luck into this, you are literally shooting yourself in the foot and I don’t want this for you.You have to actually try to meet people. I want you to take this as seriously as you would a job search, financial or fitness goal. Make a plan to get what you want in this world and then put it into action. I’m hosting a free class to help you do this in 2025.  It's called “The Ultimate Dating Plan” and it’s taking place on January 6 at 7PM Central. You need to be there if you want to find a great guy. You can sign up here or go to https://reneesuzannecoaching.com/datingplan

Your future husband is on a dating app right now looking for you. He gets as frustrated scrolling through all the ridiculousness, just like you do. I want you to help him find you. The best way to do this is to have a top notch dating profile. And yes, the pictures matter. You need those too. But your profile must stand out. The men you want to meet actually read them and decide how to treat you based on their first impression of you. This is unconscious of course, good men will treat everyone respectfully, but if you want him to be really excited about you, you’ll need a good profile. Most people have no idea how to do this. They just wing it and write the same things everyone else does which is BORING. Think about it though, you’re a successful woman who’s gotten far in life. Would you search for your dream job with a resume that you threw together on the couch one night with a glass of wine in one hand? No! The stakes are even higher here. You’re looking for someone to share the rest of your life with here, please take it seriously and write a decent profile. A good profile can introduce you to better men and get them excited about you from the moment he clicks on your profile. It can result in better initial messages, better dates and do some of the screening for you so you don’t end up with as much randomness out there. I have an amazing resource that can help you do it in just a couple of hours. It’s called “Perfect Profile Toolkit” and it’s available now at a fraction of the cost of working with me as your coach.If you’ve been wanting to work with me but not sure about taking the plunge, it’s a great introduction to my work. Click here to get instant access or go to bit.ly/gr8profile

I once met a guy speed dating and I thought he was very handsome.It later became apparent that he thought I was someone else when he scheduled our follow up date. I thought he was very handsome until I didn’t. This was an excellent, but very painful lesson for me and it made me think about a lot of things. What makes someone attractive? How tall/handsome/successful he is? Where he lives? Where he travels? What he reads? I saw him later at a street fest and turned away from him because it just felt awful to see him. I literally found him repulsive because I associated him with a negative painful experience. By contrast, my husband recently drove an hour + to the city to pick me up at 11:00 at night because I got food poisoning when I was out with my friends. He brought bags and a towel and held my hand while I tried not to be sick in the car. He took care of me the next day when I could barely move. Is that handsome hunk you think you should be dating going to do that for you or will he be at the gym or talking to some other woman? Is that really what you want to experience? I have a great resource to help you create your very own custom man plan so that you can find a quality man ASAP. Click here to download it or go to bit.ly/MANPLAN

If you’re anything like me when I was single, you just want to skip to the good part and be in an amazing relationship. Looking for a guy is hard. Early dating feels clunky and awkward. You think that if you could just meet the right person and get into a relationship, everything would be fine. I found out from experience that this is not true at all. I think that dating being what it is is the Universe’s way of getting you ready for that relationship you want so much. Relationships don’t just happen, they are built. Healthy relationships take skills to build and maintain and if you don’t possess these skills you likely won’t be able to get into a relationship in the first place, and if you do it either won’t be healthy or it won’t last. Or both. I know that is not what society tells us. We’ve been weaned on this narrative that we will meet the right person and then everything will fall into place, but if you’re over 40 and this has not happened yet, it is very likely that a skill gap is responsible for this, not bad luck. Hoping that a relationship falls out of the sky is like trying to run a marathon when you haven’t trained for it. Even if you manage to make it for a couple of miles, you won’t finish and you’ll likely end up with an injury.You know you need to train for a marathon. Dating is like training for a relationship. Some people are naturally better at running, younger, or in better shape, but most people can train for a marathon and finish if they are willing to put in the effort. Dating is similar.So, instead of complaining about how hard dating is, ask yourself if you are willing to take this on as a training program for getting into the relationship you want.And if the answer is yes, then let’s get to work. I have a great resource to help you create your very own custom man plan so that you can find a quality man ASAP. Click here to download it or go to bit.ly/MANPLAN

I have a funny analogy for you parents out there. Has your child ever asked you to buy them something that they had the money for? They REEEEAAALLLY wanted it and pleaded with you to get it for them? And when you suggested that they could use their own money to buy it, they suddenly didn’t want it as much? I had 4 kiddos and this happened often. It’s kind of hilarious when you think about it. It’s human nature to be more cautious with your own money than someone else’s. Now consider your desire to find a man to share your life with. I hear all the time from women who want God/the Universe to bring them a man but when I ask what they are doing, the answer tends to be “Not very much”. Now why would God/the Universe spend his or her time and effort doing the work that you should be doing? It’s your dream for heaven’s sake! If you want God/the Universe to help you, consider meeting them halfway or at least trying to show them you’re serious about this finding a man thing. Because any good parent knows that it’s good for your kiddos to be self-sufficient and know how to get the things they want in this world. I want that for you too and it’s my belief that our creator does as well. I often find that when I put in a respectable effort, things do fall into place, but it starts with me. I have a great resource to help you create your very own custom man plan so that you can find a quality man ASAP. Click here to download it or go to bit.ly/MANPLAN

Do you know someone who watches basketball all the time? Are they a pro basketball player? Probably not. Because knowledge is not enough to actually get good at basketball. And the same is true for dating. I LOVE that you’re listening to this podcast AND, I want you to take action. Have you:Written your profile? Taken awesome pictures? Logged onto a dating site?How many new men are you talking to each week? Are you going on dates? Do these dates turn into relationships?If you want to find your forever guy, you need to be doing these things regularly. Simply knowing a lot about dating is not helping you. I talk to people who have been reading, watching webinars, listening to podcasts for years and still don’t have what they want. If this is you, you’re doing it wrong. Dating is a skill that can be learned and I can help you learn it fast, but you have to actually practice, not just watch.Don’t be like the guy who spends every weekend watching basketball (or football or whatever) who knows everything about the sport but never gets off the couch. Get into the game so you can win! I have a great resource to help you create your very own custom man plan so that you can find a quality man ASAP. Click here to download it or go to bit.ly/MANPLAN I just created a brand new package to help you write an amazing dating profile! If you’d like to check it out, click here

Unavailable men are like the junk food of dating.  If you’ve ever tried to quit anything that’s bad for you, you know how hard it is to change your preferences from things that are bad to you to things that are good for you. It involves work, but it can be done. The same goes for dating. You simply must change your preferences if you’re ever going to get different results with dating. Because dating based on attraction alone is not working for you if the only men you find attractive are not available. You need to question everything you believe and hold dear if you are to overcome this, but it’s worth it. Instead of only dating men you’re attracted to and then trying to change them, which is a ton of work and completely ineffective. Put that amount of work into changing yourself, your ideas about who you should be with and your preferences.Both are hard to do, but only one has any chance of working. It’s much easier to change yourself than another person. If you’re to have any chance of a happy relationship, you need to start by dating better men, and that starts with actually finding them attractive. We don’t think that our preferences are learned behaviors, but they are. We learn to prefer unavailable men and we can unlearn it. Just like you unlearned how to prefer cigarettes, drinking, junk food, sugar. If you’ve ever quit anything in your life, you know what this is like. You can apply the same concepts to quitting unavailable men and enjoy way better results. I have a great free resource to help you create your very own custom man plan so that you can find a quality man ASAP. Click here to download it or go to bit.ly/MANPLAN I just created a brand new package to help you write an amazing dating profile! If you’d like to check it out, click here.