DiscoverFinding OK - Healing After Sexual Assault and Abuse
Finding OK - Healing After Sexual Assault and Abuse
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Finding OK - Healing After Sexual Assault and Abuse

Author: Hecate

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An intersectional healing podcast for survivors of sexual assault and any/all abuse. When survivors share, they share strength. "Finding OK" helps people navigate this difficult healing process. The focus is on recovery, self-care, empowerment, and healing. You are not alone.
86 Episodes
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Sandy Phillips Kirkham is a survivor of clergy abuse and the author of, "Let Me Prey Upon You". Sandy was very active in her church growing up, her faith was the center of her life. When she was 16 her youth pastor groomed and manipulated her into a sexual relationship. After years of abuse she managed to exit the relationship and reclaim her life. Sandy kept her experience a secret for 27 years before she had to face it and begin her healing journey. Today Sandy is a strong advocate for surv...
Part 2 of my interview with Andrew Pledger. This episode will focus on Andrew's experience with conversion therapy, how he found support exiting fundamentalism, his expulsion from BJU, and the work he's doing healing and speaking out. Andrew was raised in a fundamentalist Christian cult and realized in his youth that he was gay. He attended Bob Jones University, which is a fundamentalist Christian college with a chilling history of abuse. While there, Andrew was bullied, harassed,...
Andrew Pledger was raised in a fundamentalist Christian cult and realized in his youth that he was gay. He attended Bob Jones University, which is a fundamentalist Christian college with a chilling history of abuse. While there, Andrew was bullied, harassed, tailed by college employees, and subjected to conversion therapy. In his junior year Andrew was expelled from BJU for publicly denouncing fundamentalism. Andrew is healing and working hard to spread awareness of religious abuse. His new p...
Raising Yourself

Raising Yourself

2023-08-0855:36

Alice Cottonsox joins me to talk about recovering from childhood abuse, battling Agoraphobia, and facing online hate with humor. Alice is very open about her mental health struggles in her viral videos and she's helping many survivors feel less alone. Alice is being her own parent and raising herself, something that we sometimes have to do post-trauma when prolonged abuse as children has robbed us of the opportunity to grow up the way we deserved. Alice's Website: https://www.cottonsox....
Broken vs. Wounded

Broken vs. Wounded

2023-07-2521:00

Do you think of yourself as "broken" because of your trauma? What about "wounded"? My sister Chie and I discuss how the language we use to talk about our trauma intersects with our healing. This episode is an invitation to investigate the hidden meaning that some words might be holding for us. I used to think of myself as broken but gradually shifted away from that term as I healed because I realized that for me personally, it implied irreparable harm or uselessness. Chie has very different e...
I'm back! Welcome to Season 5! Today I'll be sharing some of what I got up to over my break, letting you know what's new in Season 5, and talking about what's alive for me in my personal healing journey right now. In March my sister Chie and I attended Paganicon 2023, an annual Pagan Convention in the Twin Cities. I know a lot of you have been waiting to hear more about this witchy gathering! I let you know which rituals, workshops, and lectures I attended and which ones were my favorites. I ...
This is the last episode of Season 4! Today I'll be taking some time to thank everyone who made this season possible, updating you about how I'm doing, and what I'll be getting up to over break!New episodes will resume in July 2023. Just because there aren't new episodes doesn't mean there isn't new content! I'm taking time during break to practice self-care, focus on personal growth, and to doing lots of new and exciting things! You can check it out by following me on Twitch and Instagram, o...
Letters for the Fire

Letters for the Fire

2023-02-0740:59

Letters for the Fire is a listener participation project. Listeners were invited to write a letter to their rapist or abuser, and I promised to read them before burning them in a ritual. The goal is to create a community opportunity for catharsis, release, and healing. Today I will be reading your letters so your words can be heard. A video of the letter burning ritual will be made available later. A link will be included in episode notes when it is ready.Hecate's Linkshttps://linktr.ee/Findi...
Ruth is a survivor who has been facing her past and doing the work. She's a listener who is sharing some of her story and discussing some of the steps she's been taking in her life to heal. She's been meeting her trauma with courage, humanity, and grace that I know others will find inspiring. We discuss her assault by a family member, how her recent meeting with him went, her experiences within the Salvation Army Church, how Purity Culture has affected her, her struggles with suicidal ideatio...
My sister Chie joins me to talk about our evolving understanding of self-care and emotional regulation. We are both survivors navigating life and CPTSD. I hope you'll join us for some laughter and real talk.Chie has a BA in Somatic Psychology. She is a harpist, Championship Irish Dancer, and singer. She and her partner live in the Midwest with their two puppies.Internal Family Systems Therapyhttps://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapy-types/internal-family-systems-therapySpoon Theoryhttp...
Obelis is a Lithuanian Fantasy and LGBTQ+ comic artist. Her work includes War & Tea, Meow Are You?, and The Recloseted Lesbian. Obelis tried to come out as a lesbian but was forced back into the closet by her ultra-religious, homophobic, and abusive mother. In The Recloseted Lesbian she deconstructs and processes memories from her abusive childhood. It has been read by over 21 million people on Webtoon. As she does her own trauma work she is helping survivors feel less alone. Obelis Linkt...
Kalpashree Gupta joins me to share her journey in healing from childhood sexual abuse. We discuss letting go of shame and blame, what forgiveness means to her, breaking cycles of family trauma, and where she's found strength, grace, and empowerment.Kalpa is the CEO and founder of Knekxt Group, a consulting and coaching company helping her clients build trust, and mitigate risks while also creating internal awareness for the high achievers who, like herself, have used their achievements to def...
One Life One Heart

One Life One Heart

2022-12-0601:14:23

Michelle M. Kang is the founder and president of One Life One Heart, a nonprofit organization which helps underserved sexual abuse survivors by offering culturally sensitive community support. She has dedicated herself to creating safe spaces where survivors can feel heard, regain their self-confidence, and fulfill their purpose in life. Michelle was born in South Korea, she has PhDs in Linguistics and Education, and she is the current Dean of the School of Foreign Languages at Saigon Interna...
Paula Mulamula is the host of the Mental Health podcast, Talk Shit With P where she focuses on real talk and breaking the stigma surrounding mental health issues. Today Paula is breaking her silence and sharing her story of surviving sexual assault and reclaiming her power post-trauma. She also shares how podcasting helped her find her way out of depression, how faith has re-entered her life and become a part of her healing, and how self-care helps her through the difficult times in lif...
Healing After Family Abuse

Healing After Family Abuse

2022-11-0801:33:22

Emi is a survivor of family sexual abuse; she was molested by a family member over a long period of time as a young kid. After spending over a decade hiding from her past she decided to try to heal from it. Her healing journey led her to starting her own podcast: Motherful: Powerful Moms, Powerful Topics. Her co-host is her best friend Kayla, together they tackle the many difficult social and mental health issues that have affected their lives and made them who they are. In this episode Emi s...
Start By Believing

Start By Believing

2022-09-1301:26:37

Hollis Brown's platform as Miss Wisconsin USA is focused on survivor advocacy, and she’s a part of End Violence Against Women International’s “Start By Believing” campaign. Today Hollis speaks about her assault in college, how trauma changed her life, where she has found strength, and the work she’s doing in the world. Originally from Savannah, Georgia and now residing in Milwaukee, Hollis Brown is a 26-year-old sports marketer, podcast host, mentor, public speaker, model, youth educator, non...
Part 2 of my conversation with Kaitlin Bellamy about what it was like for her growing up in the Mormon Church and the ways that purity culture contributed to the abuse she experienced in her marriage. Purity Culture grooms people to enable, accept, and perpetrate abuse. She shares her healing journey now that she is free to be her full, authentic self.Kaitlin Bellamy is a professional actor and young adult fantasy author with a hero complex currently living in Orlando, Florida. She is an avid...
Kaitlin Bellamy shares what it was like for her growing up in the Mormon Church and discusses the ways that purity culture contributed to the abuse she experienced in her marriage. Purity Culture grooms people to enable, accept, and perpetrate abuse and assault. She shares her healing journey now that she is free to be her full, authentic self. Kaitlin Bellamy is a professional actor and young adult fantasy author with a hero complex currently living in Orlando, Florida. She is an avid collec...
In 2006 I was assaulted and stalked by a monk in India. In this episode I share my journal entries recording this experience and then discuss the ways this trauma has affected my life. I discuss the intersecting issues of race, culture, and gender; as well as the importance of anti-racism work in trauma healing. I share the way that being assaulted while menstruating can affect the way trauma is embodied and experienced afterwards. During this experience I talked my way out of further violenc...
Then and Now

Then and Now

2022-07-1901:19:39

In this episode my friend Sage and I listen to audio we recorded two years ago during lockdown and reflect on it. We talk about (and feel our way through) some of the very intense systemic issues we're facing in America and in the world. We talk about self-care, finding ways to keep moving forward, staying resilient, and finding ways to engage and stay hopeful.Sage is the creator of Real Human Better, a Social Permaculture course and community. She loves permaculture, compost, food made with ...
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