Fkd Up By Faith

 FKD UP BY FAITH is back!  My first guest of this new season is the fabulous Rachel Blackman, who describes herself as a somanaut, acrobat of the heart, artist,  somatic educator, somatic coach, theatre maker, and  mentor This was such a great conversation that could have gone on for several hours (and probably will for a few more!)  Rachel shares about growing up with Christian science, and about her evolving spirituality rooted in the earth, in interconnectedness, in the wisdom of the ancestors, in the intelligence of the body, and ultimately, and most fundamentally, in hope. She also very deftly started interviewing me at one point! LINKS Rachel's website - https://www.vibrantbody.co.uk Tiny Failures  - https://www.tinyfailures.com The Somatic School - https://www.thesomaticschool.com Article about Improv and Polyvagal Theory  by Lacy Alana - https://www.yesandbrain.com/blog/improv-and-polyvagal-theory

Piet Ceanadach is a teacher of Paganism, especially the Wiccan and Druid-Craft paths. He is a third-degree Gardnerian High Priest and author of fiction based on Celtic Mythology. He lives in Glasgow. Piet has a great deal of knowledge of religion and spirituality and is a humble teacher and guide. In this episode, Piet shares specifically about his pre-pagan life as a Jehovah's Witness, including a period of personal tragedy. He speaks about many things he is grateful for having received from the JW's and a number of things he is very much happy to have left behind.  Piet's book 'The Daughters of Danu' is available from Moon Books https://www.johnhuntpublishing.com/moon-books/authors/piet-ceanadach and all the usual online places. Piet's new book will be published soon. Piet was also keen to share his late wife's Siusaidh's books https://www.johnhuntpublishing.com/moon-books/authors/siusaidh-ceanadach

Mark Townsend  (he/him) is an Independent priest, a celebrant, magician, and author of several books including 'The Gospel of Falling Down'  I had a wonderful conversation with Mark about his life and experiences as a Church of England (and now independent) priest and celebrant and about the ministry of being f**k ups for Christ! We spoke about the privilege of being alongside people in their vulnerable and transitional moments, about how our own vulnerabilities and mistakes are the root and strength of authentic ministry. https://www.marktownsendministry.co.uk  Jude reads from 'The Wild Offering Oracle - a 52 Card Deck on Giving it all to God!' by Tosha Silver, and published by Hay House. 

Genevieve (they/them) is the founder of Queer Christians Brighton https://www.facebook.com/queerchristiansbtn Instagram: @queerchristiansbtn I had a wonderful, frank, moving conversation with Genevieve about issues relating to inclusion (or lack of it) in the church, and what it means to be affirmed and affirming. As part of their work with Queer Christians Brighton, (UK)  Genevieve is currently 'reviewing' inclusive churches, 'Trip Advisor' style for their followers.  Content Warning for a frank discussion of mental health, suicide, and 'conversion therapy'  Support Resources Grassroots - Suicide Prevention- Find help now Galop  - The UK’s LGBT+ anti-abuse charity UK based LGBTQ+ Christians seeking inclusive church might want to look at One Body One Faith and Diverse Church MindOut Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Trans & Queer Mental Health Service - UK LGBTQ- Inclusive Organisations listed on Stonewall UK Resources for LGBTQ People of Faith listed on Stonewall UK

I had a great conversation this week with Stuart Delony. We cover quite a bit of ground  from talking around what it means to 'walk out' the path of Jesus to the purpose of preaching, to the role of ministry, to worship being more than a good song!  Stuart describes himself as a storyteller, seeker, sojourner, question-asker, and provocateur. He’s a former pastor and the creator and host of Snarky Faith Radio, a podcast for the spiritually disenfranchised. It's a space to irreverently wrestle through life, culture and spirituality.  Stuart has a Masters of Global Leadership from Fuller Theological Seminary and lives in Chapel Hill, NC with his wife and kids.   Website: www.SnarkyFaith.com  Facebook: www.facebook.com/snarkyfaith  Twitter: @snarkyfaith   Instagram: @stuartdelony

I had a delightful conversation in this episode with Marc-Henri Sandoz Paradella, who is a psycho-spiritual counsellor, meditation teacher and author of the book Toxic Jesus. Marc lives in Lausanne, Switzerland, and was an evangelical pastor before he began to ask questions...  An experience of cancer in 2018, which caused him to have his leg amputated, led to what he describes as a 'reverse epiphany' where the idea for 'Toxic Jesus' was born.  We talked about the understanding of Grace, about an authentic (non-bypassing) spirituality and about finding ways back to faith after 'deconstruction'. Marc's website is https://en.marchenrisandoz.com/ The book 'Toxic Jesus' can be found in all the usual online outlets.  I read the poem 'Buddha in Glory' by Rainer Maria Rilke which you can read here https://www.poetry-chaikhana.com/Poets/R/RilkeRainerM/BuddhainGlor/index.html Marc read quotes from 'Also Sprach Zarathustra' (Thus Spake Zarathustra) a  treatise by Friedrich Nietzsche, and from the Apocryphal 'Gospel of Thomas'. 

We're back! The first episode of FUBF for 2022 with Mairtin McNamara.  I spent a wonderful, gentle and mindful hour speaking to Mairtin, who is an Irish martial artist and movement practitioner living and working (as an engineer) in Antwerp, Belgium.  Mairtin spoke about his early immersion in Catholicism, and about giving the 'perfect' confession. Our conversation moved into compassion, what it means to be 'decent' in our interactions, and how our spiritual practice informs all of that. A rich and engaging conversation that I am sure will give you food for thought.  Mairtin shared one of his own poems 'Walls' which you can see at https://www.instagram.com/p/CARLml_BEo5/?utm_medium=copy_link&fbclid=IwAR0DXLTliK4J5xOWJDDDxgoKSu85BMxuN0wsVAJw7uF9DEdY4YF9YH9AxGw He is also running a  weekend workshop - "Re-Awakening, Care & Touch" -  with Rachel Blackman in Brighton on 30th April & 1st May 2022 link below. https://vibrantbeing.vibrantbody.co.uk/courses/re-awakening-care-touch-a-weekend-workshop?fbclid=IwAR07ybBdLwQZj-Qr2f-HD-Y7El3I-kbF4duqxjUD53N8oFSRk9OxJLydPRQ

In this bonus episode for Samhain, I talk to Vicki McFall, who is a Scottish Wiccan/Pagan. Like me, Vicki has some reservations about people (In Vicki's words, the 'dabblers') adopting or cherry-picking Celtic religious festivals (and other practices) who don't always have the accompanying spiritual practice to keep them grounded, safe, and respectful. She also has a go at online 'mediums', makers of 'spell candles', and non-indigenous co-opters of indigenous sacred practices and objects.  Vicki's common sense and straight-talking ordinary-ness shed some light on common misconceptions about Pagans, Wiccans, witches, and their practices. Jude reads the 'Threshold Invocation for The Festival of Samhain' from the 'Celtic Devotional' by Caitlin Matthews.  

 Rachel Cotton is an Atheist Buddhist with Jewish roots,  an autistic parent of autistic kids, and chair of Autistic Pride Reading. http://www.autisticpridereading.co.uk In this fascinating conversation, Rachel very generously shares her faith history: her father's Judaism;  her own journey from Atheism to Tibetan Buddhism (indeed, both); her fear of death; and her love of archeology. 

Naomi Wood  (she/they)  is a Brighton-based writer, poet, performance artist, and workshop leader. We had a fantastic conversation about (you guessed it) being Fkd Up by the Evangelical Church, about expressions of faith, finding the sacred in nature, and -  of course -  about poetry! Naomi shares two spoken word pieces in the podcast. Naomi's website is http://www.naomiwoodmodel.com Instagram @naomiwoodwrites and @iamnaomiwood Brighton Feminist Bookshop https://thefeministbookshop.com/ Hammer and Tongue - poetry slam http://www.hammerandtongue.com/brighton/

In this lively conversation, multi-media artist, Jet Black talks to me about her Jewish upbringing and the importance of being a culturally and ethnic (but not religious) Jew.   She shares candidly about the recent death of her mother, and the anxiety of choosing an appropriately Jewish headstone amidst a plethora of opinions. 

It was an incredible treat to speak to poet John McCullough. John is an award-winning writer, poet, and creative writing tutor, who won the Hawthornden prize for literature in 2020 for his third collection of poetry 'Reckless Paper Birds'.  In this episode, we talk about poetry (obvs!) as well as spirituality (and the connection between the two) about mental health, queer spirituality, more poetry, and John's early church experiences as a choirboy. I share John's poem 'Sometimes I am Visited by a Church of Rain' which is from his second collection 'Spacecraft'. John shares his poem 'Soulcraft' from his third collection 'Reckless Paper Birds'. Both are published by Penned in the Margins and can be found in all the usual book-selling places.  https://www.johnmccullough.co.uk http://www.pennedinthemargins.co.uk/index.php/2017/12/john-mccullough/

Olivia talks about her neurodivergent experience of feeling separate and about addiction, trauma, and finding healing through the Twelve Steps of Al Anon.  She remains just Olivia to honour Twelve Step anonymity.   Content/Trigger warning for a brief discussion of sexual assault. 

Rachel Sparks is a dancer, dance teacher, and heart-centered embodiment educator. https://www.rachelsparksdance.co.uk In this gentle and intimate conversation with Rachel, she talks about love and loss, and about moving away from Evangelical Christianity towards a more holistic and embodied spirituality grounded in nature.

In this episode, I chat with Mary Louder, who is an Osteopathic Physician and Integrative Medicine Practitioner living in Michigan USA. Mary talks about her FOUR (4!) baptisms, and how involvement with one faith group at university nearly cost her her medical career. 

This is the first in the new bonus series which I am calling UnFkd. Along with some guests, I will be examining and deconstructing theological ideas - the harmful, the misunderstood and the just plain wrong! In this first episode, I didn't choose one of the more obvious ones - like hell, sin or the devil ( we'll get there, I promise) Instead, I tackled something which is very close to my own 'Fkd Up By Faith' experience - Clericalism. Works Cited Cuff, Simon. Priesthood for All Believers - Clericalism and How to Avoid It. London, SCM Press, 31 Mar. 2022. Quotes from Pope Francis cited are in this book. Independent Inquiry Child Sexual Abuse. “The Report of the Independent Inquiry into Child Sexual Abuse.” 2023, www.iicsa.org.uk. B.6.2: Concerns regarding the culture of the Church of England . Music - https://pixabay.com/music/beats-better-day-186374/

The Happy Heretic (she/her) is an ex-Evangelical Instagrammer.  In this uplifting conversation, we talk about her journey from Atheism to Evangelical Christianity, to leaving the church, her journey in navigating her 'deconstruction' and the hope and healing she has found away from the church.  Find her on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/thehappyheretic_/ The poem she shared was from 'Vulnerable AF' by Tarriona 'Tank' Ball of  'Tank and the Bangas' who you can see perform here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QKzobTCIRDw

I had a wonderful conversation with Oskar Marchock (he/they) whose gentle modesty had me just introduce them as 'Oskar'.  In this, our third FKD UP BY FAITH for #pride month, Oskar talks about growing up Catholic in a multiracial Caribbean family, about Christianity, Buddhist and Taoist philosophies, about being queer and trans, and about the pleasures and meaning of Trinidadian food.  Jude shared this from the Vietnamese Zen Buddhist monk,  Thich Nhat Hanh “Breathing in, I calm body and mind. Breathing out, I smile. Dwelling in the present moment I know this is a wonderful moment.”

Kaj Jensen (they/them) is a genderqueer storyteller who calls the Pacific Northwest home.  When not collecting stories, they spend time camping with their cat and spying on birds. In this our longest episode so far, Kaj shares their fascinating story of growing up as an Evangelical Christian, on a farm in the 'middle of nowhere' in the American midwest, where they asked their parents and pastor 'difficult questions'  - like what happened to the dinosaurs?  Kaj talks about queerness, community, and an authentic spirituality rooted in their love of nature. Kaj's website is kajjensen.com The Poem shared on the podcast is The Way is difficult and very intricate - by Lalla

At the beginning of Pride month, I am delighted to talk to Chris Brown (she/her) who is a UK-based trainer and consultant specialising in suicide prevention, mental health, and equalities issues, especially LGBTQ+ inclusion.  Chris tells her story of childhood and adolescence in an Evangelical CofE church, and the pain, separation and trauma caused by the imposed ideas of sin/redemption. Ultimately, given the church's rejection of her sexual identity and expression, Chrs chose 'life' rather than the church. She talks about healing in relationship, community and awareness of what inclusion actually means.   As with all episodes of FKD UP BY FAITH - content warnings for difficult and potentially triggering topics apply. You can find out about Chris's work at www.chrisbrown.uk.com Affected by any of the issues?  UK based LGBTQ+ Christians seeking inclusive church might want to look at One Body One Faith and Diverse Church MindOut Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Trans & Queer Mental Health Service - UK LGBTQ- Inclusive Organisations listed on Stonewall UK Resources for LGBTQ People of Faith listed on Stonewall UK