Fragmented to Whole: Life Lessons from 12 Step Recovery

When it comes to growing up in a dysfunctional family, we didn’t have the opportunity to form our true, authentic identity because we were so corrupted by the dysfunction. Now, of course, there are certain elements of us that are true and real and have always been there but there are other parts of our identity that we create as we come out of the dysfunction. This week’s episode 215 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about discovering your real identity and authenticity by building healthy boundaries!Support the show by becoming a Patreon member! In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing why many of us who grew up in dysfunctional families have been people-pleasing for so long. The result is that we truly do not know what it means to be authentic. I also share how building healthy boundaries allows us to finally become our true selves. Living as your most authentic self means figuring out your values and then living in alignment with those values. Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.Thank you for listening! If you enjoyed this episode, take a screenshot of the episode to post in your stories and tag me!  And don’t forget to follow, rate and review the podcast and tell me your key takeaways!Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/ CONNECT WITH BARB NANGLE:Subscribe to “Friday Fragments” weekly newsletterFree boundaries resourcesFacebookInstagramPatreonWork with Barb! Buy Barb a tea

When I first got into recovery my sponsor told me, ‘If you’re not honest with me I can’t help you. You’ve got to be open-minded to the idea that there are things you don’t know and willing to do the things you’ve never done before to succeed in recovery.” This week’s episode 214 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about the foundations of recovery- honesty, open-mindedness, and willingness!Support the show by becoming a Patreon member! In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing the 3 fundamentals of H.O.W. to recover- honesty, open-mindedness, and willingness and how I came to understand and follow each one of these and began living in alignment. Ask yourself, are you willing to do things that people around you in recovery have done in order to have the life you want? Honesty, open-mindedness, and willingness are the foundation of recovery so if you don’t already have them, you have to be willing to look inward and seek them.Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.Thank you for listening! If you enjoyed this episode, take a screenshot of the episode to post in your stories and tag me!  And don’t forget to follow, rate and review the podcast and tell me your key takeaways!Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/ CONNECT WITH BARB NANGLE:Subscribe to “Friday Fragments” weekly newsletterFree boundaries resourcesFacebookInstagramPatreonWork with Barb! Buy Barb a tea

Many of us have grown up feeling that we have to do things for others so they won’t dislike us, get mad at us, leave us, or even abuse us. We then get so deeply ingrained in this behavior pattern that we think the only way we will be okay is by getting the approval of other people. This week’s episode 213 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about how we become approval seekers and how to get out of it!Support the show by becoming a Patreon member! In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing the importance of recognizing when you’re acting as an approval-seeker as a manipulation tactic and actionable steps you can take right now to transition into the type of person that lives their life for themselves and on their own terms. Some of the talking points I go over in this episode include:  How we develop approval-seeking behavior.  The difference between being kind and helpful and being a self-sacrificing person. Why approval seeking is much more than doing the right thing for someone, it’s manipulative. Steps to go from a lifetime of approval-seeking to being someone who cares so much less about what other people think of them. Part of the process of coming out of being an approval seeker is learning to give a shit about yourself and what you think, need, and want. Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.Thank you for listening! If you enjoyed this episode, take a screenshot of the episode to post in your stories and tag me!  And don’t forget to follow, rate and review the podcast and tell me your key takeaways!Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/ LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:Ep 161. How to Care More What You Think of Yourself Than What Others DoCONNECT WITH BARB NANGLE:Subscribe to “Friday Fragments” weekly newsletterFree boundaries resourcesFacebookInstagramPatreonWork with Barb! Buy Barb a tea

As I’ve mentioned previously, I am still (and forever will be) on a journey to reparent myself. Between the last time I did an episode on this topic and now, I have made some really radical and impactful internal changes that have made an enormous difference in my life. This week’s episode 212 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about nine new methods I’ve learned for reparenting and how they’ve affected me!Support the show by becoming a Patreon member! In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing the importance of connecting deeply to your inner child and actionable steps you can use to heal your inner child's wounds.The nine new methods I use that I share in this episode include:Making consistent, conscious contact with your inner family members.Make small promises to your inner child and keep them. Get a picture of your inner child or inner teenager to make conscious contact.Find a safe place in your mind where you can go and feel safe with your inner family.Bring your inner critical parent to your safe place with you and see what happens.Play with toys, do a craft, or listen to music as a way to connect with your inner child and tap into those feelings.Allow your inner child and/or inner teenager to safely express their feelings and then soothe and affirm them as they do it.Interact lovingly with your inner critical parent so they see if there’s an inner loving parent present and are more likely to step aside than if you were to try to strong-arm them into giving up their role.Stop resisting and feel the damn feelings.Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.Thank you for listening! If you enjoyed this episode, take a screenshot of the episode to post in your stories and tag me!  And don’t forget to follow, rate and review the podcast and tell me your key takeaways!Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/ LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:Ep. 181. 5 Methods for Reparenting Myself: What That Looks Like for MeEp. 205. 24 Ways Adult Child Traits Show Up in The Workplace – Part 1Ep. 206. 24 Ways Adult Child Traits Show Up in The Workplace - Part 2 Adult Children of Alcoholics and Dysfunctional Families (ACA or ACOA)Adult Child podcast episode with Susan Anderson “The Outer Child and Abandonment Trauma”CONNECT WITH BARB NANGLE:Subscribe to “Friday Fragments” weekly newsletterFree boundaries resourcesFacebookInstagramPatreonWork with Barb! Buy Barb a tea

If you had told me years ago that boundaries were my issue, I would have never believed you. It is for that reason that I shape my content around helping others understand that their issues can be cleaned up and healed by learning to set and maintain healthy boundaries. This week’s episode 211 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about what life is like before and after building healthy boundaries! Support the show by becoming a Patreon member! In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing real testimonials from clients I’ve worked with in the past to illustrate what life was like before and after working with me to implement healthy boundaries in their lives. Some of the things I have helped my clients work through are:Speaking up about boundaries in the moment and setting them in a kind and respectful manner. Getting out of self-doubt when setting and maintaining boundaries.Standing up for yourself and communicating your needs without feeling bad about it. Overcoming fears of abandonment and establishing healthy coping strategies. Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.Thank you for listening! If you enjoyed this episode, take a screenshot of the episode to post in your stories and tag me!  And don’t forget to follow, rate and review the podcast and tell me your key takeaways!Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/ LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:Bonus Episode: Coaching with BarbEp 12: Stop GossipingCONNECT WITH BARB NANGLE:Subscribe to “Friday Fragments” weekly newsletterFree boundaries resourcesFacebookInstagramPatreonWork with Barb! Buy Barb a tea

Leading a healthy and successful intervention starts with giving people the tools they need to have an important conversation while setting healthy boundaries and communicating their truth in a respectful, open, and honest manner. This week’s episode 210 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about interventions, done differently. Support the show by becoming a Patreon member! In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, my guest Stephen P. shares his journey of turning pain into purpose, becoming a “healthy entrepreneur” and how his company gives people the tools they need to shift the trajectory of their or their loved ones' lives. Some of the talking points we go over in this episode include:How the high of adrenaline from rollercoasters and social approval as a kid transitioned into the need for getting high from drugs and alcohol later in life.What the 12-step program taught Stephen about life and the direction he was meant to go in that he could have never learned in University. The lessons of boundaries that were learned as a result of pain.Online Intervention’s take on using the foundations for healthy boundaries to give people the tools to have healthy, respectful, and impactful interventions.How Stephen weaved the principles of music and psychology into his own recovery journey.Interventions are not entertainment. When done correctly, they are not aggressive or dramatic but rather healthy and respectful, and they’re driven by tools and preparation. Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.Thank you for listening! If you enjoyed this episode, take a screenshot of the episode to post in your stories and tag me!  And don’t forget to follow, rate and review the podcast and tell me your key takeaways!Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/ CONNECT WITH STEPHEN:Online Interventions LinkedInCONNECT WITH BARB NANGLE:Subscribe to “Friday Fragments” weekly newsletterFree boundaries resourcesFacebookInstagramPatreonWork with Barb! Buy Barb a tea

“I want what I want when I want it” -  otherwise known as the inability to delay gratification, was my attitude towards life before recovery. With this mindset, I was unable to see the consequences of plowing forward to get what I wanted. This week’s episode 209 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about missing red flags- when you want what you want when you want it!Support the show by becoming a Patreon member! In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing some examples from my life where I was unable to delay my gratification (& suffered the consequences) and the tools I have gained through recovery that have allowed me to change this mindset. Do not underestimate the ability to pause because it's what leads us to be able to make rational decisions like a mature adult instead of acting out of our addictive, compulsive, and obsessive patterns of the past. Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.Thank you for listening! If you enjoyed this episode, take a screenshot of the episode to post in your stories and tag me!  And don’t forget to follow, rate and review the podcast and tell me your key takeaways!Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/ LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:Ep 8. My Tools of Recovery Part I: PausingCONNECT WITH BARB NANGLE:Subscribe to “Friday Fragments” weekly newsletterFree boundaries resourcesFacebookInstagramPatreonWork with Barb! Buy Barb a tea

It wasn’t until several years into my recovery that I realized there were certain things that I thought were fused were not actually fused. That is, I thought where one thing existed, the other automatically existed as well. Not only did I grow to understand this was not true, I realized many of the examples of this in my life had to do with dating and that building healthy boundaries was what helped me change my perspective. This week’s episode 208 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about how healthy boundaries allow you to detect nuance. Support the show by becoming a Patreon member! In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing some examples from my life where I was able to make the distinction between things I had previously thought were fused and the reasons why this type of discernment has everything to do with setting healthy boundaries. As I've built better and better boundaries, I've gotten a lot more clarity about a lot of things. It's almost like building healthy boundaries, which requires clarity, gives me the desire to seek clarity in many other areas of my life.Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.Thank you for listening! If you enjoyed this episode, take a screenshot of the episode to post in your stories and tag me!  And don’t forget to follow, rate and review the podcast and tell me your key takeaways!Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/ CONNECT WITH BARB NANGLE:Subscribe to “Friday Fragments” weekly newsletterFree boundaries resourcesFacebookInstagramPatreonWork with Barb! Buy Barb a tea

When you’re so lost and enmeshed, it can be difficult to know what a boundary is let alone even begin setting them. This week’s episode 207 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about your step-by-step guide for how to get started setting boundaries!Support the show by becoming a Patreon member! In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing my definition of what a boundary is and my 5 step framework for setting boundaries with language and examples to get you started. As a bonus, I share 2 reflection questions to help you tap into how implementing boundaries into your life will make you feel. Here are the steps:1). Start small with teeny tiny boundaries and build your way up from there2). Begin by setting boundaries with yourself3). Move on to setting boundaries with easy-going people and or people that you don't really know4). Then set boundaries with people that are not as easygoing and or people that you have long-standing relationships with5). Live on purpose and thrive!Your life is in your hands. YOU get to decide what’s okay and not okay with you and you get to tell others. Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.Thank you for listening! If you enjoyed this episode, take a screenshot of the episode to post in your stories and tag me!  And don’t forget to follow, rate and review the podcast and tell me your key takeaways!Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/ CONNECT WITH BARB NANGLE:Subscribe to “Friday Fragments” weekly newsletterFree boundaries resourcesFacebookInstagramPatreonWork with Barb! Buy Barb a tea

In a recent episode, I mentioned that I had a whole cascade of memories and understanding that I have experienced some level of trauma in every job I had before recovery This led me to self-reflect on how my dysfunctional upbringing played a role in this using an inventory about workplace traits of Adult Children from ACA. Last week I shared the first 12 traits of adult children in the workplace and today I am sharing the last 12 traits. This week’s episode 206 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about the 24 ways adult child traits show up in the workplace!Support the show by becoming a Patreon member! In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing 12 more traits from the “Big Red Book’s” list of how the traits of adult children of alcoholics and dysfunctional families show up in the workplace. I also share how they show up for me, and the top 3 traits that show up most often for me. The last 12 items of the “Working at the Laundromat” list are as follows:13. We are sensitive and can get extremely upset with any form of criticism of our work.14. We want to be in charge of every project or activity, feeling more comfortable when we are in control of every detail, rather than letting others be responsible.15. We may be the workplace “clown” to cover up our insecurities or to get attention from others.16. We are people-pleasers and may take on extra work, or our co-workers’ tasks, in order to be liked and receive approval from others.17. We do not know how to be assertive in getting our needs met or expressing a concern. We may have to repeatedly rehearse our comments before delivering them.18. We have felt that we do not deserve a raise, promotion, better workspace, or a better job.19. We do not know how to set boundaries, and we let others interrupt us. We can accept more work without knowing how to say “no” appropriately.20. We are perfectionists about our own work and expect others to be the same and have the same work ethics and values.21. We become workaholics because it gives us a feeling of self-worth we did not get as a child.22. We may jump from job to job, looking for the perfect position as the substitute for the secure and nurturing home environment we did not have.23. We get upset when people do things that affect us or our work without asking us first.24. We have a high tolerance for workplace dysfunction and tend to stick it out in an unhappy job because we lack the self-esteem to leave.Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/ LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:Ep. 205. 24 Ways Adult Child Traits Show Up in the Workplace Part 1Ep. 194. How to Know If You’re an Adult Child – part 2: The Other  Laundry ListEp. 193. How to Know If You’re an Adult Child – part 1: The Laundry ListACA Fellowship Text (The Big Red Book)CONNECT WITH BARB NANGLE:Subscribe to “Friday Fragments” weekly newsletterFree boundaries resourcesInstagramWork with Barb! 

In a recent episode, I mentioned that I had a whole cascade of memories and understanding that I have experienced some level of trauma in every job I had before recovery. Upon reflection, I know the role my dysfunctional upbringing has played in my workplace experiences. This week’s episode 205 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about the 24 ways adult child traits show up in the workplace!Support the show by becoming a Patreon member! In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing a chapter of the ACA fellowship text, affectionately known as the “Big Red Book”. Chapter 14 is called “Taking Our Program to Work” and details how the traits of adult children of alcoholics and dysfunctional families show up in the workplace. The first 12 items of the “Working at the Laundromat” list are as follows:We confuse our boss or supervisor with our alcoholic parent(s) or qualifier and have similar relationship patterns, behaviors, and reactions that are carryovers from childhood.We confuse our co-workers with our siblings or our alcoholic parent(s) and repeat childhood reactions in those working relationships.We expect lavish praise and acknowledgment from our boss for our efforts on the job.Authority figures scare us and we feel afraid when we need to talk to them.We get a negative “gut reaction” when dealing with someone who has the physical characteristics or mannerisms of our alcoholic qualifier.We have felt isolated and different from everyone around us, but we don’t know why.We lose our temper when things upset us rather than dealing with problems productively.We busy ourselves with our co-workers’ jobs, often telling them how to do their work.We can get hurt feelings when co-workers do things socially together without asking us, even though we have not made an effort to get to know them and join in the social life.We are afraid to make the first move to get to know a co-worker better, thinking they will not like us or approve of us.We usually do not know how to ask for what we want or need on the job, even for little things.We do not know how to speak up for ourselves when someone has said or done something inappropriate. We try desperately to avoid face-to-face confrontations.Stay tuned for episode 206 where I share items 13-24 from the list! Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/ LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:Ep. 194. How to Know If You’re an Adult Child – part 2: The Other  Laundry ListEp. 193. How to Know If You’re an Adult Child – part 1: The Laundry ListACA Fellowship Text (The Big Red Book)CONNECT WITH BARB NANGLE:Subscribe to “Friday Fragments” weekly newsletterFree boundaries resourcesFacebookInstagramPatreonWork with Barb! 

One of the manifestations of growing up in a dysfunctional family is distorted thinking, so it is important that we learn that we are not responsible for these thoughts popping up. However, we ARE responsible for not listening to them. This week’s episode 204 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about why you’re responsible for your second thought and not your first thought!Support the show by becoming a Patreon member! In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing the tools I gained from recovery that helped me reframe my thoughts and the method I use to make sure that I am feeling my feelings, not just soothing them. You are powerless over your first thought. You are not powerless over your second thought and over what comes out of your mouth. Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.Thank you for listening! If you enjoyed this episode, take a screenshot of the episode to post in your stories and tag me!  And don’t forget to follow, rate and review the podcast and tell me your key takeaways!Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/ CONNECT WITH BARB NANGLE:Subscribe to “Friday Fragments” weekly newsletterFree boundaries resourcesFacebookInstagramPatreonWork with Barb! Buy Barb a tea

Content Warning: Abuse For my 200th episode, I asked my listeners to send in their questions for me to answer on the podcast and while I answered a few that felt fitting for my celebration episode, I wanted to dedicate a series of episodes to answer some of the questions that were more geared to boundaries and recovery in general. In this week’s episode 203 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m answering the last of your listener questions that came from my giveaway!Support the show by becoming a Patreon member! Some of the topics I cover in this episode include:A recovery update on a recent download I had and what I was able to uncover about resentment that I hadn’t previously. Things to keep in mind when sharing your story in recovery. How you can use healthy boundaries to recover from an addiction to excitement, fear, or chaos. The difference between new relationships and relationships that stayed in my life after setting boundaries. Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.Thank you for listening! If you enjoyed this episode, take a screenshot of the episode to post in your stories and tag me!  And don’t forget to follow, rate and review the podcast and tell me your key takeaways!Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/ CONNECT WITH BARB NANGLE:Subscribe to “Friday Fragments” weekly newsletterFree boundaries resourcesFacebookInstagramPatreonWork with Barb! Buy Barb a tea

For my 200th episode, I asked my listeners to send in their questions for me to answer on the podcast and while I answered a few that felt fitting for my celebration episode, I wanted to dedicate a series of episodes to answer some of the questions that were more geared to boundaries and recovery in general. In this week’s episode 202 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m answering more of your listener questions!Support the show by becoming a Patreon member! Some of the talking points I go over in this episode include:Making amends to people you have wronged. The difference between harming and hurting someone when it comes to setting boundaries. Setting boundaries for a group of people while giving them the autonomy to set boundaries for themselves. Advice and practices for becoming more self-aware. Dating again after coming out of a codependent relationship.  Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.Thank you for listening! If you enjoyed this episode, take a screenshot of the episode to post in your stories and tag me!  And don’t forget to follow, rate and review the podcast and tell me your key takeaways!LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:Ep #42. Why Take a Daily Inventory CONNECT WITH BARB NANGLE:Subscribe to “Friday Fragments” weekly newsletterFree boundaries resourcesFacebookInstagramPatreonWork with Barb! Buy Barb a tea

For my 200th episode, I asked my listeners to send in their questions for me to answer on the podcast and while I answered a few that felt fitting for my celebration episode, I wanted to dedicate a series of episodes to answer some of the questions that were more geared to boundaries and recovery in general. In this week’s episode 201 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m answering your listener questions!Support the show by becoming a Patreon member! Some of the topics I cover in this episode include:Getting out of victim mentality after you’ve realized you're in it. How to develop and rely on a power greater than us (& the difference between reliance and dependence on this higher power).Creating healthy parent/ child boundaries when entering a new stage of life. Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.Thank you for listening! If you enjoyed this episode, take a screenshot of the episode to post in your stories and tag me!  And don’t forget to follow, rate and review the podcast and tell me your key takeaways!LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:Conversations with God by Neale Donald WalshEp. 11. GratitudeCONNECT WITH BARB NANGLE:Subscribe to “Friday Fragments” weekly newsletterFree boundaries resourcesFacebookInstagramPatreonWork with Barb! Buy Barb a tea

Although we are celebrating my 200th podcast episode, I have achieved so many other milestones through recovery and have so much in my life to be proud of and celebrate. This week’s episode 200 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is my celebration episode!Support the show by becoming a Patreon member! In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m being interviewed by my podcast producer, Alesia Galati, and answering questions from my listeners. Some of the talking points I go over in this episode include:A brief walkthrough of the biggest lessons and milestones from my recovery journey. What sparked my interest in starting a podcast to share my life lessons and experiences. How I use the tools I gained through recovery to help others and how my own boundaries keep me focused.Overcoming the toughest parts of my journey with the help of my Higher Power. The biggest things I had to realize in order to transform my life. It is so important to me to share the wisdom it has taken my entire life to learn and I look forward to continuing this in episodes to come. Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.Thank you for listening! If you enjoyed this episode, take a screenshot of the episode to post in your stories and tag me!  And don’t forget to follow, rate and review the podcast and tell me your key takeaways!LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:Ep. 1. My story in brief Ep. 8. My Tools of Recovery Part I: PausingEp. 9.  My Tools of Recovery Part II: Reaching OutEp. 10. My Tools of Recovery Part III: Focus On Me Listeners to Leads: Double Your Downloads By Podcast Guesting with Barb Nangle Galati Media CONNECT WITH BARB NANGLE:Subscribe to “Friday Fragments” weekly newsletterFree boundaries resourcesFacebookInstagramPatreonWork with Barb! Buy Barb a tea

The number one thing that stops people from setting boundaries is dealing with the feelings of guilt and shame that come up. This week’s episode 199 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about four ways to manage your difficult feelings when setting boundaries!Support the show by becoming a Patreon member! I like to think of boundaries as the healthy midpoint on a continuum where enmeshment is on one end and abandonment is on the other. I’ll be honest when I say that getting to this midpoint is not easy but I encourage you to keep going and find the peace that boundaries bring. The four ways to manage difficult feelings when setting boundaries are: Connect with other people who are going through the same thing as you to reassure and guide you. Be (or become) a person of integrity. Establish your higher power and hand things over to that power. Use your intellect to change your mind about what you think. I start all my boundaries coaching with mindset work because you have to believe that being a good person includes having healthy boundaries before you can start to set them for yourself. Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.Thank you for listening! If you enjoyed this episode, take a screenshot of the episode to post in your stories and tag me!  And don’t forget to follow, rate and review the podcast and tell me your key takeaways!CONNECT WITH BARB NANGLE:Subscribe to “Friday Fragments” weekly newsletterFree boundaries resourcesFacebookInstagramPatreonWork with Barb! Buy Barb a tea“6 Weeks to Better Boundaries with Barb” online course BetterBoundarieswithBarb.com

This is the podcast "Fragmented to Whole: Life Lessons from 12 Step Recovery." It will help people who want to heal to move from fragmented to whole. Hi, I'm Barb! I share my experience, strength and hope from 12 step recovery in each episode. They're all 20 minutes or less. Unlike most recovery podcasts where you hear a person's whole story, in this one each episode is about a specific topic. There are many life lessons from 12 step recovery that are applicable to those in and outside of recovery. This podcast brings some of those lessons to the airwaves, including such topics as learning acceptance, recognizing and overcoming victim mentality and establishing healthy boundaries.

Recently, I was talking with a friend and reflecting on how I managed to change some of my long-standing patterns of behavior and the methods for how that change process unfolds. This week’s episode 198 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about how to change your behavior after 50 years in the other direction! Support the show by becoming a Patreon member! In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing some of the big ways I have changed my life over the years and how learning to pause became the framework for every other tool I got from recovery. The framework I share for changing your behavior includes:You have to believe theoretically that change is possible for humans and if you don’t think it just yet, seek out people who have already done what you're looking to do and use them as inspiration. Start to entertain the idea that changing this behavior is something you can do. Think through situations you’ve been in where if you would have done the new behavior, things would have turned out differently. Continue to be committed to the behavior change. Understanding that you can stop and change directions is one of the secrets to living a life of contentment. You can learn how to stop doing the things that are not serving you, that are draining you, that are making you feel ashamed, unhappy, or unfulfilled. Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.Thank you for listening! If you enjoyed this episode, take a screenshot of the episode to post in your stories and tag me!  And don’t forget to follow, rate and review the podcast and tell me your key takeaways!LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:Ep. 8 My tools of recovery series Part I: Pausing CONNECT WITH BARB NANGLE:Subscribe to “Friday Fragments” weekly newsletterFree boundaries resourcesFacebookInstagramPatreonWork with Barb! Buy Barb a tea“6 Weeks to Better Boundaries with Barb” online course BetterBoundarieswithBarb.com

Looking back, I can see I had this ‘I want what I want when I want it’ mentality in many areas of my life. But now that I’m in recovery and emotionally mature, I’m able to see that it had a lot to do with immaturity. I’m now able to delay my gratification and make life so much easier for myself rather than harder. This week’s episode 197 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about delayed gratification- the antidote to “I want what I want when I want it.”Support the show by becoming a Patreon member! In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing a story of the time I overlooked some major red flags and rented a camper van anyway because I wanted to fulfill my plan to go on a 6-week solo road trip. After many calls to mechanics and finally ditching the van, I learned a very valuable lesson about making my life easier by taking time and thinking critically. The secret here is delaying gratification long enough to look at the truth of things. Stop ignoring red flags and ask for help if you don’t trust your own judgment. At the end of the day, just because you want something doesn’t mean you should have it. Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.Thank you for listening! If you enjoyed this episode, take a screenshot of the episode to post in your stories and tag me!  And don’t forget to follow, rate and review the podcast and tell me your key takeaways!CONNECT WITH BARB NANGLE:Subscribe to “Friday Fragments” weekly newsletterFree boundaries resourcesFacebookInstagramPatreonWork with Barb! Buy Barb a tea“6 Weeks to Better Boundaries with Barb” online course BetterBoundarieswithBarb.com