Hello Dysfunction

Welcome Miss Ashleigh! Great minds think alike, growing up in the country, ancestry surprises and psychology studies. Radio shows, spoken word, navigating the mental side of sw and some cool prison stories. For bonus episodes, HD chat, early releases and live streams join us on Patreon!Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe and watch on YouTube!https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunctionFollow us on IG: Instagram.com/hellodysfunction Submit your questions/stories: hellodysfunctionpodcast.com 

Welcome Nelly! Gas station hostage, sickness is going around, intro to the game and girls are sexualized EARLY. Always trust your gut, spicy online content, working for a service and something to give you nightmares.  ❤️ Follow Nelly at Instagram.com/sexynellyy For bonus episodes, early releases and live streams join us on Patreon!Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe and watch on YouTube!https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunctionFollow us on IG: Instagram.com/hellodysfunction Submit your questions/stories: hellodysfunctionpodcast.com 

Been a busy girl, unexpected visitor, great Bay Area representation and Gavin should stop talking. A local kidnapping, pray for Mexico, RIP PeeWee and don’t be rich and play poor. For bonus episodes, early releases and live streams join us on Patreon!Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe and watch on YouTube!https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunctionFollow us on IG: Instagram.com/hellodysfunction Submit your questions/stories: hellodysfunctionpodcast.com

Welcome Alyssa! We love good maintenance, are women the gross ones, men will do anything and a provider does not want your man. Don't discuss too much on the phone, creative new services, huge dad nightmares and a story of survival. ❤️ Follow Alyssa at Cry Baby Pampering Instagram.com/crybabypampering  For bonus episodes, early releases and live streams join us on Patreon!Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe and watch on YouTube!https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunctionFollow us on IG: Instagram.com/hellodysfunction Submit your questions/stories: hellodysfunctionpodcast.com 

Welcome Jose! Super Bowl weekend , fold your clothes, we don’t understand numbers and college is hard. Neighbors being ridiculous, driving ticket tips, Kraft singles and surprise chili dogs. ❤️ Follow Jose at Instagram.com/xjsilverio   For bonus episodes, early releases and live streams join us on Patreon!Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe and watch on YouTube!https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunctionFollow us on IG: Instagram.com/hellodysfunction Submit your questions/stories: hellodysfunctionpodcast.com 

Meet niece Jaymee, another earthquake, testing Pat’s memory and 2026 is not being nice. Eat the rich, Elon is humiliating, Blueface is back and stop hiding the aliens!❤️ Follow Jaymee at Instagram.com/whereisjaymeeTiktok.com/@whereisjaymeeFor bonus episodes, early releases and live streams join us on Patreon!Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe and watch on YouTube!https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunctionFollow us on IG: Instagram.com/hellodysfunction Submit your questions/stories: hellodysfunctionpodcast.com 

It’s been a rough week, neurodivergent headquarters, rethinking barber school and  congratulations to raffle winners LUVY and TESSA JENKINS!! TikTok is cooked, give back plastic bags, sneaky workplace fun and inappropriate grandmas. For bonus episodes, early releases and live streams join us on Patreon!Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe and watch on YouTube!https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunctionFollow us on IG: Instagram.com/hellodysfunction Submit your questions/stories: hellodysfunctionpodcast.com 

Crystal is doing better, guest episodes are coming, Happy Birthday Stinkers and Xmas is gone. Congratulations Rubi Ro and Carmen, it costs more to be left handed, boy moms strike again and a viral snack worth trying. For bonus episodes, early releases and live streams join us on Patreon!Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe and watch on YouTube!https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunctionFollow us on IG: Instagram.com/hellodysfunction Instagram.com/lurkpatafriaInstagram.com/crystaldamato21Submit your questions/stories: hellodysfunctionpodcast.com 

Peez is a feisty old woman, Pat’s been cooking, Crystal made a mistake and hands off Venezuela. Abolish ICE, new holsters, a surprise protein source and stay away from mad scientists. For bonus episodes, early releases and live streams join us on Patreon!Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe and watch on YouTube!https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunctionFollow us on IG: Instagram.com/hellodysfunction Instagram.com/lurkpatafriaInstagram.com/crystaldamato21Submit your questions/stories: hellodysfunctionpodcast.com 

Nice coats, big cleaning plans, NYE traditions and prime thrifting. School for fun, Mochi is innocent, give us our plastic bags and the United States is an ATM.For bonus episodes, early releases and live streams join us on Patreon!Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe and watch on YouTube!https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunctionFollow us on IG: Instagram.com/hellodysfunction Instagram.com/lurkpatafriaInstagram.com/crystaldamato21Submit your questions/stories: hellodysfunctionpodcast.com 

Disclaimer: we’ve experienced some technical difficulties this week so our apologies for the sound quality!! They have since been corrected so next week will be great! Christmas is over, the best neighbor is gone, Crystal scored on marketplace and warn your kids before their toys pee. Mochi might be up for adoption, buy your sons baby dolls, magas had a rough week and Crystal invented new nachos. For bonus episodes, early releases and live streams join us on Patreon!Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe and watch on YouTube!https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunctionFollow us on IG: Instagram.com/hellodysfunction Instagram.com/lurkpatafriaInstagram.com/crystaldamato21Submit your questions/stories: hellodysfunctionpodcast.com 

Pat is sick, telepathy is real, it’s ok to be a gremlin and the holiday party was LOVE. Christmas can be every day, let’s play QVC, POTUS finds a new low and perimenopause changes your senses! For bonus episodes, early releases and live streams join us on Patreon!Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe and watch on YouTube!https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunctionFollow us on IG: Instagram.com/hellodysfunction Instagram.com/lurkpatafriaInstagram.com/crystaldamato21Submit your questions/stories: hellodysfunctionpodcast.com 

Pat is the grinch, we hate inconsiderate neighbors, check on your mom if she screams and 67 is not a devil number. Dressing for attention is over, always use the correct wipes, 304s need to up their price and actually make excellent housewives.  For bonus episodes, early releases and live streams join us on Patreon!Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe and watch on YouTube!https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunctionFollow us on IG: Instagram.com/hellodysfunction Instagram.com/lurkpatafriaInstagram.com/crystaldamato21Submit your questions/stories: hellodysfunctionpodcast.com 

Celebs will always let you down, don’t claim to be native unless you have proof, the holiday party is almost here and increase pay for all teachers! Cats speak English, Pat the barber, above average social skills and let’s be ants. For bonus episodes, early releases and live streams join us on Patreon!Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe and watch on YouTube!https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunctionFollow us on IG: Instagram.com/hellodysfunction Instagram.com/lurkpatafriaInstagram.com/crystaldamato21Submit your questions/stories: hellodysfunctionpodcast.com 

The holidays are here, eat some weevils, we love a mullet and Zach had a nice breakfast. Crystal had an oops, there’s something strange in the neighborhood, don’t flush honeydew and no more Campbell’s soup!For bonus episodes, early releases and live streams join us on Patreon!Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe and watch on YouTube!https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunctionFollow us on IG: Instagram.com/hellodysfunction Instagram.com/lurkpatafriaInstagram.com/crystaldamato21Submit your questions/stories: hellodysfunctionpodcast.com 

Get your Holiday Hangout tickets, old episodes are crazy, Crystal loves dirty bears and grief is weird. Growing up without parents is hard, don’t gamble with Pat, some kids need hit and shoplifting class. For bonus episodes, early releases and live streams join us on Patreon!Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe and watch on YouTube!https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunctionFollow us on IG: Instagram.com/hellodysfunction Instagram.com/lurkpatafriaInstagram.com/crystaldamato21Submit your questions/stories: hellodysfunctionpodcast.com 

Earthquake! Happy Birthday Carolyn, we had a garage sale and no more pennies. Teeth are a luxury, Christmas is cancelled, churches aren’t walking the walk and art theft is so lazy. For bonus episodes, early releases and live streams join Patreon!Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe and watch on YouTube!https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunctionFollow us on IG: Instagram.com/hellodysfunction Instagram.com/lurkpatafriaInstagram.com/crystaldamato21Submit your questions/stories: hellodysfunctionpodcast.com 

Happy Birthday Will! Crystal is in disguise, daylight savings is whooping us and poor people can scam. We’re only good at war, push kids to learn phonics, Aileen didn’t get a fair trial and Crystal snuck off to the movies. For bonus episodes, early releases and live streams join Patreon!Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe and watch on YouTube!https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunctionFollow us on IG: Instagram.com/hellodysfunction Instagram.com/lurkpatafriaInstagram.com/crystaldamato21Submit your questions/stories: hellodysfunctionpodcast.com 

Marysville is different, we’ve been mispronouncing words, turn off automatic braking and we want women drivers. Pat made a calm down corner, ghosts are attention seeking, don’t shop this holiday season and what did YOU take for show and tell? For bonus episodes, early releases and live streams join Patreon!Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe and watch on YouTube!https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunctionFollow us on IG: Instagram.com/hellodysfunction Instagram.com/lurkpatafriaInstagram.com/crystaldamato21Submit your questions/stories: hellodysfunctionpodcast.com 

The universe said Pat’s been too happy, people have been mean to Crystal, Blueface is possibly Pat’s soulmate and Peez dances to her own drum. Don’t knock b*tches at the gym, get your merch while you can, protect your neighbors and you can’t pray away mental illness.  For bonus episodes, early releases and live streams join Patreon!Patreon.com/hellodysfunction Subscribe and watch on YouTube!https://youtube.com/@hellodysfunctionFollow us on IG: Instagram.com/hellodysfunction Instagram.com/lurkpatafriaInstagram.com/crystaldamato21Submit your questions/stories: hellodysfunctionpodcast.com