Hot Mess Mil MomS

In light of the recent mass changes, and liberties being taken with a swift movement of a pen...... we wanted to reflect on the imaginary executive orders we would take in our lives as dependas. It was suprising how our minds really wandered with this task, but we were able to narrow it down to just a creative few. In this week's TikTok preview live we were even able to meet a spouse and answer some live questions. Send us your executive order ideas of things you would change in your military life. Email us at hotmessmilmom@gmail.com.

We are back after a long holiday, moving, flooding, and military mom disasters! It is now 2025, and let us tell you....... we have not enjoyed the trial run! We definitely want a refund! This week we catch up with the hellacious sh!t shows that have been our past weeks, and give our solemn pinky promises to return next week come he// or high water. Enjoy our misery to make your start to the new year feel a little more normal.

Mom is the real Santa. So why isn't my face on a Coca Cola truck? Momming is difficult everyday. The holidays amp up the difficulty. Shopping, cooking, planning, everyday duties, traveling, and making sure everyone has their wants and needs met are all stressful duties that seem to land on us as mothers. Moms can't write their letter to Santa because guess what.......

Santa Baby, just make the world revolve around me, and my needs! Well, it is December. We are no longer considered crazy for having our trees up. Our homes are shiny with red and green like the Griswolds! Kids expect miracles every morning from that creepy little elf doll. Similarly, families expect miracles every holiday season from the Army. Join us as we discuss some of the more common and hilarious entitled expectations of military spouses and service members in this week's newest episode. Happy falalalalas hot messes!

To be a bitch or not be a bitch? That was Shakespeare's real question I think! Whether it is gus fraba, woosah, or counting to a million, we all have different ways of keeping ourselves calm. What may work for one, does not always work for another. Everyday we meet Karens and Kens. Temptations are all around us that make us want to explode or show a less demure side of ourselves. Even if we do not lash out, we wonder if we are even allowed to be mad. AITA for being upset? Are my feelings justified?

Just because you're an adult, doesn't make you honest. Mean Girls, Heathers, Scary Movie, and all 90's and 80's movies taught us that high school is tough. Bullying is a rough patch that at a minimum 75% of kids face at least once in their lives. Today it is beginning earlier in life. Elementary school is the new high school. Should a kid be punished for defending themselves? What is the difference between retaliation and self defense? What if the bully is not only the student, but also the teacher?

Before you sign on to a task or commit to something, you want to do your research. Before joining the Army or becoming an Army spouse, you talk to a recruiter. You also watch movies or shows or Google some points. Or you do something else entirely. You soon discover, after signing that red, white, and blue line, that all of your "research" was bullsh!t. You made assumptions as a civilian about the military, like most do. Even as a spouse, most continue to have those misunderstandings. We see them with their posts and "Aw Honey" questions everyday on social media. We clear up our most commonly heard misconceptions of the Army life.

We are back after a missed week. This was due to extreme amounts of Gatorade and chicken soup. Veronica braved the PCS drama! Join us as we catch up on our parenting hell, favorite screenshots, mover drama, and general f$ckery of the week. Excuse the technical difficulties as we venture into new territory of long distance podcasting. Still working out the bugs.

First you get the soldier, then you get the Tricare, then you get the Charger! We all face the daunting battle of who has it harder. Does a SAH parrent or a working parent face more struggles? Women especially, will tear each other apart on a social media post over this topic. Well, we are not falling into that trap today, but unless you have been both, you really do not have a say. In the military world, we have a term for any unemployed spouse. You are either a dependo or a dependa. You cannot just be any unemployed spouse. There are certain characteristics you must have. We begin with a special dependo. Let us just call him loving E4.

I'll take Army jibberish for $500 Alex! There are acronyms for almost everything. They are used to abbreviate, save time, save energy, save ink, whatever else is needed to save! If you do not understand what they mean, they are completely useless. As we nod and smile while our soldiers talk, we are clueless. Today we play a little educational game of "Guess the acronym!" Maybe you learn a little something with us? Maybe you know everything, and find out we are idiots? Either way, laugh and enjoy the f$ckery with us as we take the next step in becoming informed milspouses!

Army is a language all in it's own! You wanna be supportive, and listen. What do you do when you have no clue what they are talking about? Just nod and wave. Smile and look pretty haha! There are things we have to know, such as unit or phone numbers, but there are things we really do not need to have to have stored in our brains. How many tanks are running. Why they need to have QRS's to get the LMN's to the color numbers, and have the accountability to the dude in the AM. If none of that made sense to you, you are not alone because that is how it all sounds to us!

It's the not so secret lives of dependa wives today! Reviews and reactions are important. There are many sites out there with business reviews. We look, read, and make judgements based on these reviews. Whether you are researching the next base to move to, because you are delusional or fresh and think we actually get to choose, or trying to choose a realtor (that is not full of drama). There is one other source that many do not think about, and that is social media. How you present yourself on a personal level, reflects your professional side as well. Join us as we dive into the fresh hell brewing around businesses spiraling, because owners and employees just can't stop commenting.

It's been a rough week for us hot mess moms! This week's episode was one of no scripts, and just chatting about life! Our highs and lows in the military, some laughable screenshots of the week, and just random giggles about the fuckery of life. Enjoy our laid back time, and much needed R & R!

When we were kids, we hated being told what to do. Teachers, coaches, parents, and all adults had rules, lessons, advice, and guidance instructing us on how to live life. They gave us this instruction from the moment we woke to the time we ended our day. Now as adults, we have no clue what to do half of the time...... unless you're a soldier! Lucky assholes! As spouses, some of us have careers and know exactly what path to travel every time we move. Some of us just find the next McDonalds to apply to. Some just search for the couch to buy with his/her star card for our bonbon munching while we build our MLM. Those that are left are trying to better our paths, and grow. Whether you're navigating education, improving or figuring out the clusterfuck of federal resumes, or decipher the USAJobs, we are chatting about it today!

Volunteering in the military ie the FRG’s, much like democracy, spandex, and the Facebook, things began with good intentions, and then it’s just spiraled downhill and ended with Kamala/ Trump, one size fits all, and spouse groups. Whether you watched Army Wives or watched Mean Girls, you are gonna relate and pretty much know what it’s like to volunteer in the army. Trying to make friends in the military can be touch and go, but volunteering in the right program is a much better avenue than making a friends post! Join us today as we serve up a fresh hell not just in parenting, but also in friendship and serving your military community!