If I Speak

Ash Sarkar and Moya Lothian-McLean sort the personal from the political, tackle listener dilemmas and air their opinions on the frustrations of modern life.

38: Why is Andrew Tate’s manosphere so seductive? w/ Matt Shea and Jamie Tahsin

Moya and Ash are joined by the authors of Clown World, a new book exposing Andrew Tate’s grip on his followers around the world, to talk about why patriarchy is so seductive. Plus, advice for a special one who is drowning under their workload. Email your missed connections and dilemmas to ifispeak@novaramedia.com Music by Matt […]

11-12
01:11:59

37: Do you believe in ghosts?

The veil is thin this time of year, so Moya and Ash tackle a mystery question about the spirit realm. Plus, neighbourhood cat panics and advice for a listener who can’t stand that her friend is a police officer. Email your missed connections and dilemmas to ifispeak@novaramedia.com Music by Matt Huxley.

11-05
56:21

36: Should being a girlboss earn me a break from cleaning?

Ash and Moya wonder why women still shoulder the burden of housework, even when they’re #leaningin to their careers. Plus, a listener who doesn’t know how to deal with his cheating ex-partner. Email your missed connections and dilemmas to ifispeak@novaramedia.com Music by Matt Huxley.

10-29
54:19

35: Help! My scatty friends can’t meet my standards

Are you a Black Cat? Or a #cleangirl? Do you have Main Character Energy? Moya has a big theory about the urge to give ourselves new labels. Plus, a listener who feels like her friends and family can’t meet her standards. Email your missed connections and dilemmas to ifispeak@novaramedia.com Music by Matt Huxley.

10-22
01:00:20

34: How mean can you be to other people’s kids?

Ash and Moya channel their inner Clint Eastwoods to lament the rise of trick or treating, and consider how to interact with other people’s children. Plus, a listener dealing with confusing feelings after a difficult abortion. Email your missed connections and dilemmas to ifispeak@novaramedia.com Music by Matt Huxley.

10-15
01:04:39

33: What makes you embarrassed to be leftwing?

Moya and Ash turn the weapon on themselves with a Mystery Question about the lows of being on the left – haters and losers, pyrrhic victories, strategic balls-ups and the rest. Plus, a listener who’s falling out of love just as their partner needs support. Email your missed connections and dilemmas to ifispeak@novaramedia.com Music by […]

10-08
51:12

32: What makes a house a home?

Inspired by Moya’s big move, Ash wonders what the necessary ingredients are to turn a house share into a home. Plus, advice for a listener whose friend is infatuated with her lecturer. Email your missed connections and dilemmas to ifispeak@novaramedia.com Music by Matt Huxley. Help us build people-powered media: https://novara.media/support

10-01
49:32

31: Why isn’t my best friend excited about my wedding?

Moya and Ash argue over a big theory about our need for surprise. Has modern life killed off spontaneity in everything from dating to holidays? Plus: advice for a listener who’s wondering why an old friend isn’t more excited to be his best man. We’re sorry about the uneven audio quality for part of the […]

09-24
58:53

30: Unbothered, moisturised, happy – and ready for a relationship?

Are you sitting comfortably? Because Moya has come to a big realisation – and some new rules on dating etiquette. Plus, a whole a new batch of your Missed Connections! Get in touch if you recognise any of these objects of our affection. Email your missed connections and dilemmas to ifispeak@novaramedia.com Music by Matt Huxley.

09-17
01:07:20

A message from Moya…

Moya and Ash are absent this week – but in the meantime, they’re preparing for a LIVE recording of the show this Sunday, 15th September, as part of the London Podcast Festival. They’ll be joined wise guest Yomi Adegoke, author of The List, to help solve your dilemmas and sort the personal from the political. […]

09-10
01:14

29. Has therapyspeak improved our lives?

Does knowing your attachment style make life any easier? Moya and Ash tackle a mystery question about our newfound fluency in the language of therapy. Plus: advice for a listener who’s becoming estranged from his sister. ONLY TWO WEEKS until our live show at the London Podcast Festival! Join Moya, Ash and special guest Yomi […]

09-03
01:00:27

28: What the hell is a gut feeling, anyway?

Moya is on the brink of change – but can she trust her gut on the biggest decision of her adult life? Plus, advice for a listener confused about their lifelong lack of sex. You’ve only got a few weeks to grab your ticket for our live show at the London Podcast Festival on 15th September, […]

08-27
58:00

27: I’m in big trouble! Your dilemmas answered

Ash and Moya dedicate a whole show to answering your dilemmas! Featuring a woman questioning her age-gap relationship, an infuriating parent who won’t budge on politics, a ghosted lover plotting her revenge, a loner who wants to start socialising, and a low-earner who resents her rich friends. You’ve only got a few weeks to grab […]

08-19
01:04:24

26: I’m so sorry, I’m English

Moya has a big theory for Ash – but the script goes out the window when they start talking about the far-right violence engulfing the UK and unpacking their own emotional reactions to English racism. After that: playing matchmaker with the first batch of Missed Connections. Content note: This episode includes discussion of racist language and […]

08-13
01:11:46

25: I hate the way that you walk, I hate the way that you talk

Prompted by Kendrick’s anthemic Drake diss, Ash claims we’re living through the summer of the hater. But what does it mean to hate so hard? Plus: a listener who feels rejected by her English in-laws. Email your missed connections and dilemmas to ifispeak@novaramedia.com Got your tickets for the If I Speak live show yet? We’re […]

08-06
01:14:23

24: Help! What’s my purpose in life?

Moya and Ash butt heads over the lure of individualism and living a political life. Plus: Moya enters her busy-body era with a new segment, Missed Connections! Tell us about the brief encounters you just can’t shake, and we will hunt them down and make them bae. Email us your missed connections with as much […]

07-30
01:10:05

23: Surviving your Saturn return

Moya and Ash debate the power of astrology and explain how they survived their ‘Saturn return’ era. Plus: Ash’s best anti-procrastination techniques. Come and see If I Speak live at the London Podcast Festival on 15 September! Tickets available from Kings Place now. Got a problem? Tell us: ifispeak@novaramedia.com Music by Matt Huxley.

07-23
01:05:16

22: How will I know if I really want kids? w/ Renay Richardson

Ash and Moya are joined by podcast entrepreneur and single mum Renay Richardson to talk about the realities of solo parenting, from being blocked from adopting to the shortage of Black sperm donors. Plus: a harrowing faux pas. Come and see If I Speak live at the London Podcast Festival on 15 September! Tickets available […]

07-16
01:21:49

21: What does it take to be effortlessly cool?

Ash has a theory of cool that involves nonchalance, style and timing – but Moya’s not so sure. Plus, advice for one listener who wants respect in their situationship, and someone dealing with a newcomer to the family. Come and see If I Speak live at the London Podcast Festival on 15 September! Tickets available from […]

07-09
54:02

20: Skinny is back in fashion. FFS!

The return of low rise jeans was a harbinger of something worse: being seriously thin is back in fashion. But why now? Moya and Ash have a Big Theory. Plus: the brown girl moisturising protocol. CW: weight, dieting, eating disorders, cosmetic procedures. Come and see If I Speak live at the London Podcast Festival on […]

07-02
56:24

Alex Small

You aren't though

08-15 Reply

Roxanne Johnson

Finally got around to listening to this. Fascinating to hear Moya and Ash's take on emotional, cultural and interpersonal issues. "Stamp on me queens", (please do not).

03-20 Reply

Recommend Channels