Inherently Happy

Look for things to like about people--there’s usually something, some trait, Some aspect of them as people existing in this world that you can’t disallow, Something that resonates, that connects and has the power to create! Create what? Understanding at the very least if not friendship right now. [full text below] Ep. 426 - Like Happy We begin as always  with the Happy Creed. We believe in Happy,  in Balance and Growth,  of being Mindful and Grateful, Compassionate and Understanding. Yowza Haha My Happy Friends! I’m helpful, empathic, a real caretaker type--want to know why? Want to know how? I look for things to like about people--there’s usually something, some trait, Some aspect of them as people existing in this world that you can’t disallow, It’s something that resonates, that connects and has the power to create. Create what? A friendship!--a camaraderie. Now I’ve met people who seemed just awful, Like, why-would-you-want-to-subject-yourself-to-their-abuse kind of bad news, They’re hurtful and mean and seem to really enjoy being cruel and slightly unlawful, But they can also be really loyal to those whose company they choose. I met a guy at work once who everybody hated--he was bossy but had no authority, He didn’t outrank anyone, he just acted as if he did--so was routinely ignored, And the distaste for him wasn’t just from a few but from the vast majority, And so my challenge was to try to find some Happy detail just waiting to be explored. He tried bossing me around too, but I simply kept talking to him instead, I’d talk about TV shows and movies and stuff and he’d stop and look at me weird, Then he’d ask me what I was doing, and I’d say that he seemed to be very well-read, And that I always appreciated intelligent conversation--at which he scoffed and sneered. But still I kept talking to him about topics I enjoyed, like books, food and music too, Then I suggested we go to a movie and get something to eat and he looked worried, “I’m not trying to hit on you,” I assured him. “A good movie discussion, me and you.” And so we went! And outside of work he was way more chill and completely unhurried. We became friends and he mellowed at work too. People didn’t hate him quite so much. He had a lot of knowledge about film and could be very generous with what he knew, But he was also embarrassed about his inexperience in the social scene and such, So, I invited him to parties and get-togethers, but he simply didn’t know what to do. He rubbed people the wrong way due to his extremely awkward and arrogant vibe, So, I didn’t try to force him to make friends with everybody and I let him just be, And we were like brothers for years, he was a cameraman and I was a scribe, We swore we’d make movies together that the whole world would be dying to see. And then there came a girl that I liked and I told him about her, wanting to share, But, you see, he decided that he liked her too and felt he was far more deserving than me, So, when I told him how my courtship was going he pretended like he didn’t care, When all the while he was plotting to steal her heart away as if by divine decree. And he used all the inside scoop that I had been feeding him to turn her head, He knew everything she liked, but what he didn’t know was what she hated, And chief among those things was liars and so she felt sorely misled, She pulled away and he tried to cling, but her feelings had long since vacated. He didn’t like her, you see. He merely wanted her, and that’s not the same thing, You have to find something to relate to about someone even something small, But he never allowed himself to feel for others. He hurt her and me--a real ding-a-ling, I avoid him now--for safety--but I did like our discussions before he went AWOL. I’m a bit more careful about who I try to find likable things about, but I still try, Finding a friend where no one else bothered looking can be its own reward, Sometimes I even turn those powers upon myself if I think I’m being a mean guy, And could maybe use a friend, someone like Happy, just waiting to be adored. I like finding things about people to like, it makes life more interesting, more fun, It doesn’t always go great, but that’s life for you, it’s something to do, until we’re done. Haha Yowza

I’m what you might call Consent Happy and I’m in no way being sarcastic, I CRAVE consent, in fact--for all manner of interactions and activities,  Consent is Informed, Conscious, Revocable, Affirmative, Voluntary and Enthusiastic,  The first letters of which spell out “I CRAVE”--thus satisfying my poetic sensitivities.   [full text below] Ep. 425 - Consent Happy We begin as always  with the Happy Creed. We believe in Happy,  in Balance and Growth,  of being Mindful and Grateful, Compassionate and Understanding. Yowza Haha My Happy Friends! I’m what you might call Consent Happy and I’m in no way being sarcastic, I CRAVE consent, in fact--for all manner of interactions and activities,  Consent is Informed, Conscious, Revocable, Affirmative, Voluntary and Enthusiastic,  The first letters of which spell out “I CRAVE”--thus satisfying my poetic sensitivities. Consent must be Informed or else you won’t know what you’re agreeing to, And Conscious, since you can’t agree if you’re all passed out with nowhere to go, And Revocable, meaning you can take it back if that’s what you want to do, And Affirmative, meaning it’s a clear decision and not just the absence of the word No. Consent must also be Voluntary, and not the result of some pressure or threat, And it must be Enthusiastic, meaning it is clearly, positively and actively stated, And I CRAVE Consent because this world doesn’t seem to have gotten that memo yet, This means I think people should ask before they so much as hug--even if you’re related. Maybe someone’s suddenly shy, or has back pain or just feels icky inside, Consent is just a good habit to get into as it gives people a choice, And it also means that people who do the asking have to be okay with being denied, ‘Cause it defeats the whole purpose if nobody listens to your voice. And the right of Consent is not just for some people, but for everyone, Regardless of gender, age, culture, relationship or any previous consent, Just ‘cause you hugged somebody once doesn’t mean consent is over and done-- Reestablish it each and every time in case something changed in preference or intent. Now I know this must seem like overkill to some folks ‘cause who’s going to bother? Like, what kid is really going to ask for consent to hug or kiss his mother or father? And I get that, which is why I say it’s something I CRAVE, since I know it’s in short supply, And I can’t even claim that I always insist that others comply. Sometimes it’s tough to stop someone before they grab you, And saying something then might be seen as unfriendly and a bit cuckoo, But I still prefer consent, regardless, and I want to normalize it, So let it just be a reminder that we all should decide what we’re willing to permit. Haha Yowza

Happy Trying means you see everything as an opportunity to grow and explore, To find value in the journey instead of just spoiling the ending from the start, Sometimes you’ll fall, but don’t let that stop you from what you were climbing for. [full text below] Ep. 424 - Happy Trying We begin as always  with the Happy Creed. We believe in Happy,  in Balance and Growth,  of being Mindful and Grateful, Compassionate and Understanding. Yowza Haha My Happy Friends! Happy Trying means you see everything as an opportunity to grow and explore, To find value in the journey instead of just spoiling the ending from the start, Sometimes you’ll fall, but don’t let that stop you from what you were climbing for. It’s true that even the best plans, which take a long time to develop, can still fall apart, But it doesn’t mean never plan again, if anything it means you should plan more-- Have several backups, so that stumbles merely break your stride and not your heart. Happy Trying is getting absorbed in the process rather than in the treasure you hope to find, It’s where mindfulness reaches its peak, and every gesture is made with intention, Where you aren’t just doing some chore, you’re connecting spirit, body and mind. It’s about getting into the flow state, where mundane movements gain a new dimension, Where previously disjointed and scattered efforts suddenly become aligned, And an action you’ve taken a thousand times before seems like a new invention. If you don’t pay attention, then even doing something for the first time can be boring, But if you can lock in and attain total focus, then balance and growth become self-starting, And old routines that have gotten tired finally become aspects of life worth exploring. Haha Yowza

Do your best to communicate with people in ways they prefer, To match their comfort levels, so connection and understanding can build, Our shared humanity taking us where we could go from where we were, Allowing us to be Communication Happy, which can help keep us fulfilled. [full text below]   We begin as always  with the Happy Creed. We believe in Happy,  in Balance and Growth,  of being Mindful and Grateful, Compassionate and Understanding. Yowza Haha My Happy Friends! People like to understand people, and to be understood in return, This is why I like those who talk plainly, and keep their points short, Who teach using simple lessons that are easy to learn, With diagrams and illustrations for aid and support. They could use big words, sure--they could get fancy, and all that, But then who would they have left to talk to and what would they gain? Why try to dress up their meaning in a fancy coat and hat, When they can include more people without needing to explain?    I, myself, like to write because it gives me time to compose my thoughts, But some folks prefer to talk, so I can do that too, of course, Other folks like to visit and gather in numbers at all the hot spots, But that can make me feel less heard, so it’s not something I tend to endorse. Misunderstandings can cause trouble and confusion,  You can wind up fighting with people with whom you actually agree, So, when someone speaks, listen--don’t just jump to a conclusion,  Let them know you heard, then let them hear you, so you both can see. I do my best to communicate with people in ways they prefer, To match their comfort levels, so connection and understanding can build, Our shared humanity taking us where we could go from where we were, Allowing us to be Communication Happy, which can help keep us fulfilled. Haha Yowza

Temper your passion with wisdom, your frenzy with good sense,  Aim for Balance and Growth in your pursuits so you don’t panic,  Or turn what once seemed fun into something far too intense,  But can develop naturally in a way that's healthy, sustainable and organic.   [full text below]   Ep. 422 - Love Happy We begin as always  with the Happy Creed. We believe in Happy,  in Balance and Growth,  of being Mindful and Grateful, Compassionate and Understanding. Yowza Haha My Happy Friends! I used to be in love with Love,  A state I was rather fond of, But Love can be a tricky thing, So, play it cool, and never cling. I was conditioned, you see,  Into thinking that persistence and grand gestures were key, That passionate, imaginative pitching of woo  Was all a suitor had to do! Alas, alack and mercy be,  I finally learned that ain’t for me. The tragedy is not that you’ll lose a Love you could’ve had, But, much worse--that you’ll win the heart of someone bad, Because the promise of Love can cloud every thought, So that you realize too late what such folly has brought.  I used to chase after dates and show my affection with poems and gifts,  Without ever getting to know them first, through connection or trust,  I also used to love finding a new hobby, who doesn’t love one that temporarily uplifts? But if it had no real staying power or substance it would wind up a bust. New things can be exciting, all mysterious and attractive and stuff, But if there’s no compatibility, then it’s doomed to breed discontent, Because no matter how much you try to force it, it’ll never be enough, That’s why when it comes to Love, you’d do well to start with mature intent. Is how you’re behaving something you plan to sustain? Or is it just a big show that will be over far too soon? Then what will you do when pleasure turns to pain? Can you get over yourself after being over the moon? Love Happy means to temper your passion with wisdom, your frenzy with good sense,  To aim for Balance and Growth in your all interests and pursuits so you don’t panic, Or get so carried away that what at first seemed fun becomes too intense, But can develop naturally in a way that is healthy, sustainable and organic. Haha Yowza  

If we base our sense of self on what others demand of us, and try to conform to that, Then we won’t know who we are, how we feel, what we think--and that’s never any good, But if you make mindful choices of who you see yourself as, then you won’t be a doormat, You’ll become the person you always wished you could be, but never thought you could.   [full text below] Ep. 421 - Happy Identity  We begin as always  with the Happy Creed. We believe in Happy,  in Balance and Growth,  of being Mindful and Grateful, Compassionate and Understanding. Yowza Haha My Happy Friends! Happy Identity means being true to yourself, knowing who you are and who you want to be. And then becoming that Happy version of you. I used to sign my name in cursive letters, I hated it, but what could I do? Well, anything. So, I stopped. And it instantly felt more like me, And nobody cared, and here I thought I’d face the same backlash that meets all trendsetters. So, then I started to look at all the other things I did just because I thought I had to-- I stopped eating foods I never really cared for, and cut out friends I could never please, I even changed the way I coughed--you didn’t know you had control over that, but you do, I used to cough in sharp, violent bursts, and then I switched it to a painless wheeze. It might sound weird, but I also stopped caring so much about what other people thought, They didn’t have to live my life, that was mine and mine alone, and I just had to do my best, I could read what I liked, and watch what I liked, and think what I liked, believe it or not, I could sleep on my side, I could sneeze loud or soft, I could pick up and move West. And so I did. I moved thousands of miles away from anyone I knew to find my tribe, Artists and filmmakers and free thinkers and rebels and people looking for connection, And I found them--buried amongst monsters too strange to convincingly describe, But we all have the potential to become monstrous if we don’t fight the identity infection. If we base our sense of self on what others demand of us, and try to conform to that, Then we won’t know who we are, how we feel, what we think--and that’s never any good, But if you make mindful choices of who you see yourself as, then you won’t be a doormat, You’ll become the person you always wished you could be, but never thought you could. Haha Yowza  

Happy Responsibility means having integrity and being self-aware, About being trustworthy, thoughtful, reliable, even-tempered and wise, Being resilient, ethical, and able to communicate how much you care, About being considerate, strong, mature, and being able to empathize.   [full text below] Ep. 420 - Happy Responsibility We begin as always  with the Happy Creed. We believe in Happy,  in Balance and Growth,  of being Mindful and Grateful, Compassionate and Understanding. Yowza Haha My Happy Friends! Do you let things happen to you or do you take ownership of your life, good or bad? Are you accountable for your choices and actions or do you let others be blamed? Like, if you gave someone bad advice would you apologize or even be sad? Or if you took bad advice would you make the one who gave it to you feel ashamed? Happy Responsibility means having integrity and being self-aware, About being trustworthy, thoughtful, reliable, even-tempered and wise, Being resilient, ethical, and able to communicate how much you care, About being considerate, strong, mature, and being able to empathize. If you spend all your time trying to grab what you can, and never sharing,  Then you’ll become someone greedy, which is how others will see you too, But if you can look beyond yourself and simply notice how others are faring, Then you’ll start to develop a sense that they have full lives just like you. Being responsible isn’t just about yourself, but contributing to humanity at large, Empowering others, teaching, helping, and being a good steward of the general trust, If you only look out for yourself, it isolates you--making you desperate to be in charge, But by creating inclusive communities you build connections that are not only good but just. Haha Yowza  

Suffering comes from resisting pain, refusing to accept it, thinking it will go away,  But that just makes it worse and leaves you completely unprepared and weak, You’ll lose all your defenses and will further crumble when life refuses to obey, But if you can learn to accept the crashing waves, you’ll find the strength you seek.   [full text below]   Ep. 419 - Happy Acceptance We begin as always  with the Happy Creed. We believe in Happy,  in Balance and Growth,  of being Mindful and Grateful, Compassionate and Understanding. Yowza Haha My Happy Friends! Acceptance isn’t the same as giving up,  Just ‘cause life has pain doesn’t mean you quit, Use that pain to temper your steel,  Toughen you up and let you heal,  ‘Cause acceptance isn’t the same as giving up. Ever feel drained, bruised, battered, mistreated, abused and taken advantage of? Well, you’re not alone, but you survived it, and perhaps you’re surviving it still, And you don’t know why life is being so mean when all you ever wanted was love, So, you fight ‘cause you think to win you need to be the one with the strongest will. But if you see everything as a conflict, then every interaction becomes a war, Every setback is a battle cry, every mishap a landmine, and everyone a foe, But if you can accept that we’re all just trying to survive lives we never signed up for, Then acceptance becomes an act of strength--don't give up, just go with the flow. Suffering comes from resisting pain, refusing to accept it, thinking it will go away,  But that just makes it worse and leaves you completely unprepared and weak, You’ll lose all your defenses and will further crumble when life refuses to obey, But if you can learn to accept the crashing waves, you’ll find the strength you seek. Because Acceptance isn’t the same as giving up,  Just ‘cause life has pain doesn’t mean you quit, Use that pain to temper your steel,  Toughen you up and let you heal,  ‘Cause acceptance isn’t the same as giving up. I don't know why I just turned into a country singer, I confess, But it's just another thing you gotta learn to accept, I guess. Haha Yowza

Happy Discomfort is realizing it’s okay to feel a little uneasy if it helps overall,  Like how you “feel the burn” when you exercise and know you’re getting stronger, Discomfort can lead to making changes for the better, and the steps can be small, Don't avoid your emotions, practice and tame them, and they'll be wild no longer. [full text below] Ep. 418 - Happy Discomfort We begin as always  with the Happy Creed. We believe in Happy,  in Balance and Growth,  of being Mindful and Grateful, Compassionate and Understanding. Yowza Haha My Happy Friends! It’s the natural tendency for most people, I think, to avoid discomfort--I’m the same way, Like, if I have a memory that bothers me, or a topic that triggers me, then I want to run, I want to avoid such things, deny them, and bury them, so I can get on with my day, But the whole sweeping-things-under-the-rug method of mental health helps no one. It’s a great way to make sure those issues fester and become toxic, ready to explode, When you could, instead, chip away at their power until they can be controlled, Working to, if not stopping their effects, making them something that can be slowed, And from there being able to even raise your tolerance, you’re discomfort threshold. Happy Discomfort is realizing that it’s okay to feel a little discomfort if it helps overall,  Like when you “feel the burn” when you exercise, then you know you’re getting stronger, Discomfort can lead to making a change to something better, and the steps can be small, Like how I used to be afraid of my own emotions, they were too wild, but not any longer. As I teen I was violent, destructive, loud, reckless, prone to injury and getting in trouble, I hated being sad and lonely and told what to do and put down and I’d fight you about it, And as a result I alienated people, tearing down relationships until they were rubble, Never dealing with my emotions or facing my role in anything, and still refusing to quit. It took me losing my fiancee, totalling my car, going into debt, and getting in trouble at work Before I finally decided I should maybe try a different approach before I dug my own grave, And that was this podcast, reminders to myself to stop fighting every little thing like a jerk, And to learn how to use my emotions, and not to let discomfort keep me from being brave. Listening to these episodes can help you build up your mindfulness and gratitude,  It can remind you to seek balance and growth, to become familiar with your feelings, And no, you don’t have to turn soft--if anything the idea is to strengthen your attitude,  To gain control and empower yourself to handle all your present and future dealings. Haha Yowza

We can get stuck into habits, our movements get restricted, Our quick fixes become crutches, making us addicted. When really it’s connection we need, not escape, not solitude, But people to relate to, mind to mind and mood to mood.   [full text below]   Ep. 417 - Happy Tools We begin as always  with the Happy Creed. We believe in Happy,  in Balance and Growth,  of being Mindful and Grateful, Compassionate and Understanding. Yowza Haha My Happy Friends! Don’t fight your moods, they aren’t monstrous ghouls, They aren’t traps or weapons either, they’re just tools. Moods are your instruments, your dials, and your gauges,  Helping you navigate all your mortal human stages. We can get stuck into habits, our movements get restricted, Our quick fixes become crutches, making us addicted. When really it’s connection we need, not escape, not solitude, But people to relate to, mind to mind and mood to mood. We’re social creatures, and so we long for meaningful relationships with others, That’s why we form groups and clubs, treating our friends like sisters and brothers. And when those connections fail, it can feel like a terrible and tragic loss, Making us want to dull any and all pain we happen to come across. And for a moment we feel better, because we released some of the pressure,  But then it comes right back all the stronger with a pain that only gets fresher, And then we use that same crutch again, that last resort fix that becomes a vice, But we need more each time just to feel less than normal and not even halfway nice. It makes you not want to be alone with your thoughts, because thinking turns to worry, But that’s because you avoid your own moods, always trying to shut them off in a hurry, If instead you would change your approach, and stop thinking of them as things to avoid, You’d see that for living a fuller life, they are the best tools that could ever be employed. Happy Tools are those that make our lives easier to handle, not harder or more demanding,  Moods let us cope with hardships freeing up our horizons to be ever expanding, They’re meant to be tested, honed, practiced and drilled, skills to be improved upon, Not things to be shunned, resented, silenced, hidden, disregarded or wished to be gone. Laugh, cry, scream, frown, smile, just a little bit every day, If you fight or suppress your moods, then their power will decay, But if you get familiar with them, little by little, and bit by bit,  Then you’ll have greater control, and life will be a better fit. Haha Yowza    

Happy Learning is about finding the simplicity of a subject so it’s not something you hate, This starts with first breaking it down to its most basic forms, it’s okay to start slow, Don’t get hung up on having to be complex, if you understand the basics, you're doing great, And then it might click for you and you’ll want to keep at it and see where it, and you, can go. [full text below] Ep. 416 - Happy Learning We begin as always  with the Happy Creed. We believe in Happy,  in Balance and Growth,  of being Mindful and Grateful, Compassionate and Understanding. Yowza Haha My Happy Friends! I like to learn new things and then share the things I’ve learned,  Sometimes I share those things with myself in case I forget, So it has to make sense to me first, as far as I’m concerned, But if I get it well enough to teach myself, then it’s no sweat. When I was a kid, I didn’t really pick things up very quick, I figured I must be slow and so I readjusted my life to match, But then when I got to my late teens things started to click, I finally could take subjects I liked and so I rebuilt myself from scratch. But even after I actually got into college and made the lofty Honor Roll, I still never lost the feeling of all those years when I thought I was dumb, So I took my time to make sure I understood things completely, as a whole, And once I did I could then convert them into simple rules of thumb. No matter how complex the subject, if I could take my time, I could break it down, And if I could do that, I could fully understand it backwards and forwards, inside and out, Whether it was physics, poetry, computer science--you name it! I could go to town! And then I could teach it to others, if it was something they cared to learn about. Like, for some classes, we had to read stories from hundreds of years ago,  I’m talking like four-hundred, six-hundred, even a thousand years ago or more! And if you think your parents talk weird compared to you--you don’t even know! It’s like learning a foreign language and it took me forever--talk about a chore! But once I read all the footnotes and the study guides and it finally made sense,  Then I realized why people still liked those stories--they’re good, and funny, and deep, So, I went to class excited to delve into them, expecting the debates to get intense, But instead, nobody said a word! All my work was for nothing! It made me want to weep! But rather than waste my time in dull classrooms, I decided to share what I’d read, So, I told my classmates that I’d tell them the plots of the reading, so class could be fun, So, they sat on the carpet in the lobby outside the library, and listened to everything I said, I told them tales of adventure, scary dreams, lasting love, and everything else under the sun. They sat cross-legged, their chins resting on their fists, all shining eyes and smiling faces, And then, the next time we had class, they all chimed in, and the teacher was delighted, It made for an engaging discussion, everyone was animated and we were off to the races, Because they were informed, and in a simple way, so they could get it, and be excited. Did I dumb it down for them? I think I just made it clear, really, and it made it fun for me too, Like, if you have to learn a dead language just to read the homework--who’s going to do that? And for most of them this wasn’t even their major, so really not something they were going to do, Which meant I would’ve been doomed to painfully silent classes that fell completely flat. So, what’s the lesson here? What am I reminding myself about, and for what? Is it that you’re smarter than you think you are? That education can be fun? Am I revealing my outlook on life, that you can go with your head, and go with your gut? You know, probably a little of all of those things because who’s just one thing? No one. Like me, I like to read now, but sometimes I get lazy and would rather watch TV, I like to write, to research, to discuss, but I also like games and a really good nap, You can bring creativity and play into your study subjects, you can let them be free, Education doesn’t have to be painful, because then you’ll dread it and that’s the trap. I’ve studied all sorts of subjects across every discipline of science, philosophy and art, And I’ve always tried to bring some playfulness to it, and teachers have responded well, This is their life’s work, after all, their calling, their passion, they love it with all their heart, And the way you catch a glimpse of that is by simplifying, and turning it into a show-and-tell. Happy Learning is about finding the simplicity of a subject so it’s not something you hate, This starts with first breaking it down to its most basic forms, it’s okay to start slow, Don’t get hung up on having to be complex, if you understand the basics, you're doing great, And then it might click for you and you’ll want to keep at it and see where it, and you, can go. Haha Yowza  

Happy Flow is choosing to go in the direction of Balanced Growth, Not to paddle upstream or let your mind wander and your thoughts scatter, But to fully immerse yourself in the activity, in the form and the content both, So that you can focus, attend, and fully apply yourself to the current matter. [full text below] Ep. 415 - Happy Flow We begin as always  with the Happy Creed. We believe in Happy,  in Balance and Growth,  of being Mindful and Grateful, Compassionate and Understanding. Yowza Haha My Happy Friends! Some things hurt more the more you fight them, while other things may simply break, If you’ve ever had a sudden dread about what might happen, like a health scare, Then you know the fear it can instill within you and all the stress it can make As you try not to think about it, you try to carry on, even while the panic is still there. But fighting your possible future can destroy your actual present and leave you wanting, Unable to cope with the business of living because of something that may not come to pass, Robbing you of vitality, hope and good cheer, turning your dreams into something haunting, Where every effort is painful, every decision dire, and every doubt is just there to harass. Happy Flow is choosing to go in the direction of Balanced Growth, Not to paddle upstream or let your mind wander and your thoughts scatter, But to fully immerse yourself in the activity, in the form and the content both, So that you can focus, attend, and fully apply yourself to the current matter. This allows your efforts to work in unison, and not be fragmented, wasted, or lost, You become absorbed and carried along, your attention becomes effortless and controlled, You’re able to keep going without self-consciousness and with very little mental cost, Because your actions and intentions are aligned making the process a thing to behold. Haha  Yowza    

Emotional Inertia is the tendency for moods to stay as they are,  Whether they're an iceberg or a shooting star,  Learning control can improve our skill,  So we don't go wild our lose our will.   [full text below]   Ep. 414 - Happy Emotia We begin as always  with the Happy Creed. We believe in Happy,  in Balance and Growth,  of being Mindful and Grateful, Compassionate and Understanding. Yowza Haha My Happy Friends! Emotia is a word I made by combining the words Emotion and Inertia into one, Emotion is Feelings, and Inertia is the tendency for things to stay as they are, So, like, a car may be hard to move, or hard to stop because it weighs a ton, Just like a heavy mood may be the same way because of how much we care. If you’re having a meltdown and someone tells you to chill--your mood might not change, Though granted, it’s not quite the same as trying to stop a speeding car, of course, Emotia is just a way of saying that moods have momentum both short- and long-range, Like, a heavy mood is harder to lighten up because it just seems to have more force. Then, once you see moods as having weight, practicing them becomes exercise, And just like you wouldn’t enter an athletic competition without training first, You need to practice agility, strength and control over your emotions to maximize Your ability to be able to handle whatever life throws your way from best to worst. This is why you may find it tough to “snap out of it,” when things begin to confound, Or why it may take a minute to get “in the mood,” whatever mood that may happen to be, And this can apply to phobias as well--if you’re afraid of dogs, then don’t visit the pound, And if every attempt to kick a bad habit fails, it may take a gradual approach to break free. Happy Emotia is having a good handle on your moods, good craft, good skill, You don’t try to rush them or run them too hot from a cold start if you can help it, You do your warm ups and cool downs so you don’t pull something or make yourself ill, And you make sure you get in some good mood drills every day to stay ready and fit. And that could just involve thinking about a mood like Sadness or Hope, And then maybe moving on to Anger, Joy, Guilt and Fear,  Watch a movie, listen to a song, write out your feelings in order to cope, Learning to get comfortable with emotions prepares you for the next time they appear. Haha Yowza  

Happy Loss is understanding that the things we care about are precious to us Precisely because they have a shelf life, and a temporary lifespan, People, pets, and potential don’t last forever, which is why we make such a fuss, And should appreciate and connect with them now, and for as long as we can. [full text below] Ep. 413 - Happy Loss We begin as always  with the Happy Creed. We believe in Happy,  in Balance and Growth,  of being Mindful and Grateful, Compassionate and Understanding. Yowza Haha My Happy Friends! Sometimes you lose things--your keys, your socks, the remote, or maybe even your way,  And it can be quite heart-breaking because suddenly life stops making sense, Now, I’m not suggesting you should be glad to lose the things you had hoped would stay, But neither should you let it derail you or make you think it’s a deliberate occurrence. I was eight before I first started to doubt that things would always work out for me, Which really hurt because when I was seven I was so sure I was the chosen one, I’d been so cute and popular that people used to fight over whose best friend I’d be, But as my cuteness faded so too did my popularity and with it all my hope, joy and fun. I turned bitter, angry and fearful, I broke things, I burned things, and I learned how to hate, I got bullied by what seemed to be everyone, some actively, some passively, But as they all contributed to my maddening isolation, I couldn’t really differentiate, And so I cursed them all, some just slightly, others quite massively. Why had I lost everything? I howled. Just when things had been going so well, too? If I hadn’t been so popular to begin with, then the fall wouldn’t have been quite so tragic, But I became a widespread subject of scorn and ridicule and there was nothing I could do Except vow revenge on all those who I blamed for taking away my good luck and magic. But when things end, finding perspective may be the only thing to save you from despair, I had to tell myself that at least I wasn’t dead or imprisoned, I was merely mistreated, The world had abandoned me and so I turned my back on it--which is only fair,  And I started rebuilding my life in spite of my losses--for I’m not one to be defeated. It got worse before it got better, but the time I took learning about myself was time well spent, Often we go through life not really testing or pushing ourselves and I was basically asleep, It took losing my illusions to make me realize that I should never be idle or overly content, Because time is too valuable to waste being lazy or shallow, and never digging too deep. Part of being human is dealing with loss, it’s just how it sometimes goes, Relationships end, loved ones pass away, good fortune turns bad, and dreams disappear, But to go insane, to cut yourself off from living, or to stop caring is not what I’d propose,  For it’s the very fact that things only last for a limited time that makes them feel so dear. Happy Loss is understanding that the things we care about are precious to us Precisely because they have a shelf life, and a temporary lifespan, People, pets, and potential don’t last forever, which is why we make such a fuss, And should appreciate and connect with them now, and for as long as we can. Haha Yowza

Happy Self-Confidence is about accepting yourself as you are, About owning the moment, and trusting that you can succeed, Even if that moment is you apologizing, you do it like a star, You don’t second-guess or shy away, you just confidently proceed. [full text below] Ep. 412 - Happy Self-Confidence We begin as always  with the Happy Creed. We believe in Happy,  in Balance and Growth,  of being Mindful and Grateful, Compassionate and Understanding. Yowza Haha My Happy Friends! Happy Self-Confidence is about accepting yourself as you are, About owning the moment, and trusting that you can succeed, Even if that moment is you apologizing, you do it like a star, You don’t second-guess or shy away, you just confidently proceed. You face the music, take responsibility, and do what needs to be done, You don’t wish for a different past, you just work towards a better day, You don’t cower, complain, act cocky or deflect blame onto anyone, You just try to improve yourself to be a little bit better in every way. A tall order, to be sure, but I’ve seen people who simply refuse to even try, They prefer to deny reality, to avoid growth, to have a temper tantrum, to hide, Wishing things were different while doing the same things and wondering why-- Why they doubt themselves and have no trust or individual faith deep inside. The first step is getting to know your limits, learning what frightens you, Maybe being wrong makes you so mad that it keeps you from striving, Which means those are the things you have to practice and work through, If you ever hope to go from struggling and hating to learning and thriving. Haha  Yowza

If you know the old saying about Luck being Opportunity meeting Preparation,  And then go looking for opportunities first, you may be focusing on the wrong side,  For it’s the preparation that reveals the opportunities, and causes their activation Of all the luck you couldn’t see before because you hadn’t yet hit your stride.   [full text below]   Ep. 411 - Happy Preparation We begin as always  with the Happy Creed. We believe in Happy,  in Balance and Growth,  of being Mindful and Grateful, Compassionate and Understanding. Yowza Haha My Happy Friends! If you know the old saying about Luck being Opportunity meeting Preparation,  And then go looking for opportunities first, you may be focusing on the wrong side,  For it’s the preparation that reveals the opportunities, and causes their activation Of all the luck you couldn’t see before because you hadn’t yet hit your stride. One thing you can do to prepare is build your emotional intelligence--your mood intellect, Like, when things get stressful--How do you react? Do you rage, cry, and complain? Or are you able to take a breath, stay calm, reevaluate, and then redirect Your efforts and intentions, so you can find a way through instead of focusing on the pain. I get frustrated. I get mad. I sometimes want to slap a fool for being so unkind,  but that just adds more Meanness to the world, and I prefer to keep things Nice-- I acknowledge it to myself, and then dismiss it from my mind, --Resist worrying about anything not worth the mental sacrifice. And if you find it hard to tap into your inner feelings, then look at it another way-- Don’t think of it as being weird or soft, but instead as a way to build your agility. If you can keep your emotions from scaring or controlling you, then you won’t fall prey, And will, instead, be able to regulate your own moods with artful ability. When you get upset at someone and they don't take it seriously--doesn’t that make you mad? You wonder why you can’t affect their mood, and that they must be very tranquil and wise,  To be self-regulated like that, deciding when they want to be mad, sad or even glad, --The more familiar you are with your own moods, the easier it is to spot their compelling lies. They tell you that the madder you get, the more triumphant the release of righteous indignation,  The sadder you get, the deeper the connection you’ll have with yourself and humanity, The gladder you get, the more power you can tap into for higher levels of operation, But sometimes you just feel bothered, down, or manic trying to maintain your sanity. If you keep letting the world determine your extremes, then you might not return,  That’s why you need to practice control of your emotions for every situation, Opportunities for Balance and Growth will reveal themselves as you learn, Boosting confidence, and that all begins with Happy Preparation. Haha  Yowza  

The Meanness Test Helps you gauge your threshold for emotional unrest. What would it take for you to turn Mean? How far must you be pushed to fully vent your spleen?   [entire text below]   Ep. 410 - The Meanness Test We begin as always  with the Happy Creed. We believe in Happy,  in Balance and Growth,  of being Mindful and Grateful, Compassionate and Understanding. Yowza Haha My Happy Friends! Would you like to take the Meanness Test? It can help you gauge your threshold for emotional unrest. You just ask yourself what it would take for you to turn Mean? How far must you be pushed to fully vent your spleen? With some people, all it takes is a Monday morning, With others, someone would have to burn their house down, What’s it for you? What can cause you to rage out with little to no warning? And make your inner vengeance monster escape, and go to town? Let’s test it, shall we? Not for real, but just to see. Let’s say you drive up to a four-way stop and it’s just you and one other car, You got there first, so you have the right of way, but they take it away from you. Do you lean on the horn? Do you race after them and tailgate or follow from afar? Do you internalize their actions and let them decide what you do? Or, let’s try this--you get to work early in order to get a jump on the day, And someone chooses that moment to grind their coffee beans nearby, The sound is so loud it sends all your thoughts into wild disarray, So, do you start plotting their downfall, or just shrug your shoulders, smile and sigh? Or how ‘bout this one? You’re pulling into a parking space, but you’re off center,  So, you back up a tad to re-do it and get blasted by someone leaning on their car horn! You get out and come face to face with some abusive, screaming tormentor, Do you listen quietly or do you wish someone would’ve kept him from ever being born?  Still feeling good? Or are you starting to crack? Do you regret agreeing to this test? And wish you could take it back? Hey, you can stop at any time, but you’ll miss the lesson if you do, Because I am only citing examples that happened to me, in order to help you. Here’s the capper. You come back early from your lunch break and are met by your boss, He proceeds to berate you at the top of his lungs about something he blames you for, And the kicker is, you didn’t even do it, so it leaves you at an utter and absolute loss, So, do you fire back? Do you read him the riot act and bang his fat head against the door? You want to know what I did? I did not act Mean--heaven forbid! Sure, I felt the unease, But this is about Happy, so, please! With the stop sign runner, I laughed and said “go get it, son!” With the coffee bean grinder, I filmed myself reacting to all that fun! With the parking lot yeller, I wrote down his license plate while I smiled, And with that toxic boss, I talked to him calmly for an hour until he was no longer riled. Having a sense of humor and the heart of a storyteller keeps me focused on the tale, ‘Cause it’s only when I take things too seriously that I start to crumble and fail. I’ve laughed off punches, and insults, and bullies galore, I’ve even helped others find the funny where they couldn’t before. That’s my secret, that’s my trick, when someone makes me mad, I make a joke, It helps me release all the fury before I suffer a Meanness stroke. I want to stay Nice and I want to stay calm, it’s how I want to be, and what I want to do, And why I drew a cartoon of someone being pushed off a cliff with the words “Okay, fine. Now I forgive you.” Haha Yowza

Being able to understand opposing viewpoints isn’t a weakness, it’s a strength,  Challenging our assumptions can help us enhance our critical thinking, Boosting innovation and sparking creativity on a whole new wavelength, Allowing us to face the future bravely, well-equipped and unblinking. [full text below] Ep. 409 - Happy Understanding We begin as always  with the Happy Creed. We believe in Happy,  in Balance and Growth,  of being Mindful and Grateful, Compassionate and Understanding. Yowza Haha My Happy Friends! We’re all part of the same species, all human beings here on Earth The things that are true of any one of us, are also true of the rest, We all live in the brief mortal span between death and birth,  We all laugh, cry, eat, sleep, drink, relax and occasionally get stressed. We can understand each other just by virtue of being part of the same Human Race, We know the extremes of our own lives and can imagine the same in another’s, Perhaps differing in intensity, frequency, quality, type, context or pace, But we feel, think, live and love along the same lines as our sisters and our brothers. And understanding this fact is the first step towards appreciation and respect, We may not always agree, or even always get along, but we can still connect, Our approaches may differ, but our goals are things we all hate to neglect, And our failures are what we learn from despite being the things we’d like to reject. We can cultivate our imaginations, and practice empathy, and compassion, As long as we don’t discount others for not being part of the home team, For they may still have things to teach us, as wisdom is never out of fashion, And sharing different perspectives on humanity is easier than it may seem. Being able to understand opposing viewpoints isn’t a weakness, it’s a strength,  Challenging our assumptions can help us enhance our critical thinking, Boosting innovation and sparking creativity on a whole new wavelength, Allowing us to face the future bravely, well-equipped and unblinking. Haha Yowza

Handling your moods is your right, you can make them obey,  For that is The Inherently Happy Way. [full text below] Ep. 408 - Mood Happy We begin as always  with the Happy Creed. We believe in Happy,  in Balance and Growth,  of being Mindful and Grateful, Compassionate and Understanding. Yowza Haha My Happy Friends! Why are we all saddled with these various human moods? What reason is there for such a mess of sensitive interludes? The primary moods, as I call them, of Mad, Sad and Glad, And the secondary moods of Guilt, Fear and Hope-- Why are we subjected to each and every emotional doodad? What is their purpose, their measure, their scope? Why must we be victims of such strong feelings that so intrude,  Are they not a sign of great weakness and all that that may include? To that I say, nay,  It’s only weakness to be at their mercy, letting them win night and day, Being able to handle them is our right, get them to obey, For that is  The Inherently Happy Way. It’s a human thing, it’s very plain,  Please allow me to explain! Glad is for bonding and for making close friends, Sad is for empathy and for sharing troubles and pains,  Mad is a warning of danger, and unpleasant ends. Fear is the jolt that helps us escape ropes and chains, Guilt is the shame that compels us to change and make amends, And Hope is the outlook that encourages both hearts and brains. They are tools, they are instruments, they are partners, pals, and chums, And when wielded expertly they can help you face whatever comes. So, make friends with your moods, get to know how you feel, Practice them till you own them, or they’ll control your steering wheel. Only use them as needed, don’t go wild, or get unhinged, And the passions that might’ve overwhelmed you, will barely leave you singed. Haha Yowza

Sometimes hitting snooze may be just the thing you need,  Pressing pause on worry now to help you later succeed. [entire text below] Ep. 407 - Happy Apathy We begin as always  with the Happy Creed. We believe in Happy,  in Balance and Growth,  of being Mindful and Grateful, Compassionate and Understanding. Yowza Haha My Happy Friends! Do you ever just want to do nothing at all? People, current events, the news,  Everything just makes you want to hit snooze, Staying in bed curled up in a little ball? Well, sometimes that may be just the thing you need, As long as you acknowledge that it doesn’t have to last, You can use it to take a break until the storm has passed, Sometimes turning off worry can help you later to succeed. We all need some downtime now and then, It doesn’t make you a quitter to press pause,  It can even help you bring new life to your cause, And help prevent total burnout now and again. Haha Yowza