Landscapes of the Mind

John speaks to Bridget about an experience when he supported a stranger to save the photos off a digital camera of a great day out after the man's girlfriend had fallen of a cliff and sadly died. He shares how the experience still stays with him and how long it can take to recover from trauma, even for those involved at a distance.

James used to have a career in the military. He shares an experience where a member of his team who had access to firearms disappeared and the anxiety and actions taken to ensure everyone's safety. He speaks from a senior management perspective about how to support others through crisis and how he himself recovered from traumatic experiences.

Dave looks back at his life history and sees how he coped with episodes of anxiety and depression in the past and how now he seeks support from his dog Winston, asks friends for help, finds solace in the natural world and in yoga and other therapeutic practices.

Richard speaks to Bridget Holtom about an accident while on a Mountain Rescue mission. Richard shares his story about his physical injuries and the mental ill-health in the year that followed. He speaks of his fear of having his rifle and firearms licence removed, of 'flirting with suicide', and his gratitude for the support he received from friends, family and the care from the NHS. His words of advice to people in similar situations: 'don't be afraid to ask for help, to go for counselling', it can and will save lives.

After 30 years of military service, Colin prepared a presentation for his peers about a weapon's system he knew inside out. As he was about to walk into the room he collapsed. Clutching his heart and feeling searing pains down his arm, he assumed he was suffering from a heart attack and treated it as such. After the doctor told him that he was having a panic attack, not a heart attack, his life was never the same again. Before then, Colin would have been the first person to say you were 'weak' or a 'wuss' for showing signs of vulnerability. In the army, that so-called weakness could cost you your life, or the lives of your colleagues. If you saw cracks in the armour of your army colleagues you couldn't trust them in a crisis. Colin was so ashamed that it was a 'mental' not 'physical' illness he was suffering from, that he never told his colleagues, friends or family. Instead he suffered in silence, trying to maintain the reputation he had worked hard to secure. Now though, his journey of recovery and self-discovery has helped him to see the true cost of silence. He is starting to see how his silence, his shame, or internalised stigma, feeds the stigma that stopped him speaking out in the first place. He wants to have the brave conversations that can truly save lives. It takes a different kind of courage, but he has these brave conversations in the men's groups he runs with old friends from the army. Here, he bravely shares his story for the first time...