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Let’s Scare Michael to Death
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Description
“Let’s Scare Michael to Death” is a podcast about two queer brothers hacking their way through the horror archive. Michael Shetina is a novice when it comes to scary movies. His brother, Joe, is alarmingly fond of them. Together, they’ll plunder the depths of the glorious and depraved world of horror cinema as Joe tries to give Michael the scare of his life. With each new miniseries, each one built around a franchise or overarching theme, they delve into the best, worst, and most inexplicable offerings of the genre.
26 Episodes
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EVIL HAS BEEN MOMENTARILY CONTAINED TONIGHT! Join us, dear listener, as we complete the Halloween series with Halloween Ends (2022). We end with our rankings of the whole series and a preview of coming attractions.
"Haddonfield, a simple town where nothing exciting ever happens." Halloween Kills (2021) but it sure as hell doesn't slay, honey. Join us as we probe the Halloween series' take on contemporary populism, mob violence, and the oeuvre of country/adult contemporary icon Anne Murray - wait, sorry. What? Meet in the hospital parking lot? Bring our firearms and our children (in order of importance)? Evil Dies Tonight? FOUR MORE YEARS! FOUR MORE YEARS! FOUR MORE YEARS!
At last, we've reached the final stretch of our Halloween miniseries. Join us as we contemplate Laurie Strode's trauma, Michael Myers' side career in set decoration, and our disdain for podcasters. Wait.
As we prepare to enter the final stretch of our Halloween series next week with the first movie in the David Gordon Green trilogy, it's a good time to revisit our first episode in the series on Halloween (1978) to see - to borrow a phrase from a meme whose day has already passed - how it started and how it's going.
Your soundtrack is Foghat but your iconography is Goldfrapp. Join us as we tackle the strange amalgam that is Rob Zombie's Halloween II (2009). Highlights include Joe's genuine tears and Michael's tangents on early sound film acting, the sinking of the Titanic, and the Best Supporting Actress lineup of 2011.
Dear listeners, Halloween Resurrection nearly had the opposite effect on us. But after our little hiatus, we are back with the next iteration of the Halloween franchise: Rob Zombie's Halloween (2007).
Woof.
After Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers (1995), there was nowhere to go but up! And, indeed, Halloween H20 (1998) was just solid enough to keep Michael Shetina from ragequitting this podcast. Join the Bros. Shetina, Laurie Strode, and the disembodied voice of LisaGay Hamilton in sunny California on the night that he came home once again!
"If there is intention here, I don't like it."
*deep sigh* Well, tie a flannel around your waist and fanboy over your favorite shock jock because Halloween has gone totally nineties! Join us as we delve into Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers (1995), a movie that somehow makes Halloween 5 look accomplished by comparison. This one nearly broke us, dear listeners.
"Michael Myers should not kill people in ways that I would kill a person; I shouldn't be watching a Michael Myers kill and go 'Oh, I could do that!'"
Well, Michael Myers is back (again) and our Michael is vexed about it. Join us as we parse the fifth installment in the Halloween franchise.
Don't call it a comeback; it's a RETURN! Well, the Halloween series gets back to basics after its little Silver Shamrock detour. Join us as we examine Halloween IV: The Return of Michael Myers (1988), the first in the Thorn Trilogy, whatever that is.
“It will obliterate the children, and the parents... will probably have a hard time too.” Put on your Silver Shamrock mask and join us for Halloween III: Season of the Witch (1982), the movie did for the Halloween novelty industry what Silkwood did for the nuclear energy industry. We’ll relitigate the legitimacy of cinematic cars that go boom, the unsettling things that happen when modern and pre-modern collide, and this movie’s weird problem with the Irish.
We've returned from our slasher detour to the Halloween series proper with Halloween II: The Night Continued to Come Home. Michael has some questions. What do we gain by making Michael and Laurie siblings when the terror of the original is partly defined by the randomness of its targets? How isolated is this hospital? Why did Laurie change into a Lesley Gore wig before the paramedics arrived? How do you pronounce chiaroscuro (or Samhain for that matter)?
"This can't be happening again!" Oh yes it can, dear listener. We're back with our final installment of our slasher detour as we discuss My Bloody Valentine (1981), an incisive look at municipal governance in a small Novia Scotian mining town. Harry Warden wants to put the heart back in local politics. Several hearts, in fact.
As feral children, we never had the privilege of structured summer activities. We’ve never learned archery or been taught to swim. We’ve never frolicked in the pristine waters of a cool, clean lake nor have we hiked the shaded paths of a lush, forested hill. So, for us, this episode is very much a healing exercise in re-visioning and re-framing our formative years. So hitch a ride out to Camp Crystal Lake, located in nature’s garden: New Jersey. There’ll be swimming, hiking, archery, and more.
New Years comes early for you this year, dear listeners. Grab your Groucho Marx masks and join us aboard Terror Train, brought to you by the cinematographer of Barry Lyndon and the director of Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot! During our excursion, we'll be entertained by the close-up magic of a surly David Copperfield, the messy relationship drama of drunk co-eds, and a chameleonic killer with a flair for showmanship.
Well, it's prom night - but everything is not all right. Join us as we delve into a movie so Canadian that it has its own curling team. It's two years after Halloween and we've got Jamie Lee Curtis, Leslie Nielsen, a hot Quebecois boy with a passing resemblance to porn star Calvin Banks, and precisely 30 extras. It's Disco Prom 1980 but you won't hear any of the hits because we can't afford the rights.
We're having a war with Satan! Join us for our longest episode so far as we launch our deep-dive into the Halloween franchise. We begin the episode with a harrowing glimpse into our Dickensian childhood in Rockdale, Illinois, then we travel south along I-57 to wherever Haddonfield is supposed to be to investigate the crimes of Michael Myers. We conclude with that all-important question: are you an Annie, a Laurie, or a Lynda? The wrong answer could get you killed.
Headline: Florida Man Craves Human Flesh. Join us as we consume what might just be the most hopeful movie in Romero's trilogy. Considering the competition, though...
In which a new band of plucky (and fleshy) humans combat the true horror: the mall. Join us as we ponder the appropriate place of pie-fights within zombie apocalypse media. Caution: watch out for the helicopter blades.
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