Life With Althaar

In which John B. arrives at The Fairgrounds, a space station in the Teegarden's System commonly known as the unluckiest place in Human space, and finds himself living with Althaar, the nicest being you'd ever want to meet, from a species whose very presence in any way causes Humans to react instinctively with fear, panic, and nausea. As John goes about his new day and job on the Fairgrounds, he meets many of the other beings who have wound up there, and discovers that even the simplest day-to-day existence on the station is basically a death-defying act.      EPISODE ONE "Welcome to the Fairgrounds" written by Ian W. Hill & Berit Johnson   featuring John Amir as John B  Berit Johnson as Althaar, Bridge Crew, Security Guard #2, Sopon Eli Ganias as Hardyfox "H.F." Fornes  Alyssa Simon as Lieutenant-Commander Frallen-Br'ar Ivanna Cullinan as Commander Torianna, Galaxbudget Passenger Amanda La Pergola as Mrs. Frondrinax  Chris Lee as Chip Frinkel, GalaxBudget Passenger Zuri Washington as Delilah "Dee" Mallory, Bridge Crew with Ian W. Hill: Announcer, CustomsBot, Welcome Video Voice, Bridge Crew, Recreation DirectorBot, Drunk Alien Olivia Baseman: GalaxBudget Voice, Amber on the Bridge Linus Gelber: CabinBot, RoboMechanic, Bridge Crew Anna Stefanic: GalaxBudget Passenger Jessica Stoya: HECNET Voice, Bridge Crew Fred Backus: Flux Abondante, smuggler Philip Cruise: Helpful Alien, Security Guard #1, Bridge Crew Lex Friedman: Voice of Fairgrounds, Vape Emporium Announcer Derrick Peterson: Bridge Crew   Berit is the supervising producer, showrunner, and script supervisor Ian is the audio producer, sound designer, and technical supervisor The writers’ room consists of Berit, Ian, John, Amanda, Chris, Philip, Lex, and Linus Theme and Interstitial Music composed and performed by Anna Stefanic Illustration by Dean Haspiel Library Music and SFX licensed from Storyblocks WEB: www.geminicollisionworks.com -- TWITTER: @AlthaarTweeting ‏and @LifeWithAlthaar  Optimized for best listening on earbuds or headphones.   Entire Production © 2019 Gemini CollisionWorks   Thank you for your attention; it is a pleasure working for you.   A Gemini CollisionWorks Production   EPISODE SCRIPT HERE!

In which Dee's backup band at The Electric Egg leaves The Fairgrounds, and Dee learns to her horror why you should always sign a contract based on local time. Althaar attempts to get closer to his new roommate John B through meditation, with disastrous results. And a new Xbidont musician, a 12-armed virtuoso on 5 instruments at once, arrives on station, and may be the answer to at least one of Dee's problems, if only he weren't, like so many of his species, a peanut butter junkie.     EPISODE TWO "Asymmetry in Band Structure Theory" written by Philip Cruise   featuring Ivanna Cullinan as Commander Torianna, Safety DirectorBot Alyssa Simon as Lieutenant-Commander Frallen-Br'ar Berit Johnson as Althaar, Security Guard #2, Drunk Alien, Sopon Zuri Washington as Delilah "Dee" Mallory Chris Lee as Chip Frinkel Eli Ganias as Hardyfox "H.F." Fornes, Q'Crudup John Amir as John B, Diego, Busted Xbidont Derrick Peterson as Xtopps Amanda La Pergola as Mrs. Frondrinax, Vert with Lex Friedman: RVD Krankor Communications Fred Backus: Ensign Rose Philip Cruise: Security Guard #1, Tiny Bill Tremaine Ian W. Hill: Announcer, Ziggy, CustomsBot, Shlooma, Park InfoBot Olivia Baseman: Charles Stringus Leila Okafor: Transit Hub Announcement Anna Stefanic: Gate Welcome Voice Holly Pocket McCaffrey: Hydroponics Park Voice Linus Gelber: Youth Hostel Kid     Berit is the supervising producer, showrunner, and script supervisor Ian is the audio producer, sound designer, and technical supervisor The writers’ room consists of Berit, Ian, John, Amanda, Chris, Philip, Lex, and Linus Theme and Interstitial Music composed and performed by Anna Stefanic Songs composed, arranged, and programmed by Berit with help from Ian and Anna   Illustration by Dean Haspiel Library Music and SFX licensed from Storyblocks WEB: www.geminicollisionworks.com -- TWITTER: @AlthaarTweeting ‏and @LifeWithAlthaar  Optimized for best listening on earbuds or headphones.   Entire Production © 2019 Gemini CollisionWorks   Thank you for your attention; it is a pleasure working for you.   A Gemini CollisionWorks Production   EPISODE SCRIPT HERE!

In which the omnipresent (and possibly omnipotent), multidimensional Lt. Frall chooses to finally take some time off, but sends a future version of themself back in time to take their place and be present again when The Fairgrounds' senior staff is visited by The Fidorians, a friendly, dog-like species that turns out to have a surprisingly dark side, as the demand the return of an unknown item known to be on the station. Perhaps Sherlock HolmesBot and his associate Veronica Gardens can help find the mysterious mcguffin. Meanwhile, The Electric Egg runs afoul of the all-powerful Musicians Union, and must placate their rep, Mo Stolber, if they don't want to be shut down.     EPISODE THREE "Such Stuff as Dreams" written by Linus Gelber   featuring John Amir as John B Berit Johnson as Althaar, Transit Voice, Customs Officer, Sopon, Kwontz Derrick Peterson as Xtopps, HECNET Voice Ivanna Cullinan as Commander Torianna, Safety DirectorBot Alyssa Simon as Lieutenant-Commander Frallen-Br'ar, PA Voice Eli Ganias as Hardyfox "H.F." Fornes, HTA Voice Amanda La Pergola as Mrs. Frondrinax, Transit Voice, Customs Officer Zuri Washington as Delilah "Dee" Mallory, Transit Hub Voice Chris Lee as Chip Frinkel with David Arthur Bachrach:  Crazy Caller, Rex Linus Gelber: CommsBot, Mo Stolber, Radio DJ Ian W. Hill: Announcer, Recreation DirectorBot, Sherlock HolmesBot, Customs Officer Lex Friedman: Transit Voice, Veronica Gardens, Door Voice Jessica Stoya: Completely Innocent Not-a-Smuggler Traveler Olivia Baseman: Amber on the Bridge Dean Haspiel: Hunter the Fidorian Leila Okafor: Fidorian Movie Narration Philip Cruise: Tactical Officer     Berit is the supervising producer, showrunner, and script supervisor Ian is the audio producer, sound designer, and technical supervisor The writers’ room consists of Berit, Ian, John, Amanda, Chris, Philip, Lex, and Linus Theme and Interstitial Music composed and performed by Anna Stefanic Songs composed, arranged, and programmed by Berit with help from Ian and Anna   Illustration by Dean Haspiel Library Music and SFX licensed from Storyblocks WEB: www.geminicollisionworks.com -- TWITTER: @AlthaarTweeting ‏and @LifeWithAlthaar  Optimized for best listening on earbuds or headphones.   Entire Production © 2019 Gemini CollisionWorks   Thank you for your attention; it is a pleasure working for you.   A Gemini CollisionWorks Production   EPISODE SCRIPT HERE!

In which a disaster strikes that threatens the entire station, but the robots morally won't fix it because of union rules, and humans legally can't fix it because it will kill them. Unfortunately, it turns out that John B, due to his mysterious past, falls under neither of these categories fully, and is required to perform the repair even though it will kill him. Can he figure out a solution that will keep him alive and get the repair fixed in time? And will Althaar's attempts to relax him through massage and a new Jacuzzi have any effect on his mood?     EPISODE FOUR "B, Robot" written by John Amir and Lex Friedman   featuring Alyssa Simon as Lieutenant-Commander Frallen-Br'ar, Commissary Voice Ivanna Cullinan as Commander Torianna Chris Lee as Chip Frinkel  John Amir as John B Berit Johnson as Althaar, Alien Barfly Derrick Peterson as Xtopps Eli Ganias as Hardyfox "H.F." Fornes Amanda La Pergola as Mrs. Frondrinax Zuri Washington as Delilah "Dee" Mallory with Ian W. Hill: Recreation DirectorBot, Announcer, Winston ChurchillBot Fred Backus: Systems Chief Rojas Philip Cruise: J. Edgar HooverBot Lex Friedman: Station Voice, Mother JonesBot Leila Okafor: Conference Room Voice Holly Pocket McCaffrey: Hydroponics Voice David Arthur Bachrach:  Class TraitorBot Dean Haspiel: Working StiffBot, Fast Food Customer Linus Gelber: Jimmy HoffaBot   Berit is the supervising producer, showrunner, and script supervisor Ian is the audio producer, sound designer, and technical supervisor The writers’ room consists of Berit, Ian, John, Amanda, Chris, Philip, Lex, and Linus Theme and Interstitial Music composed and performed by Anna Stefanic  Illustration by Dean Haspiel Library Music and SFX licensed from Storyblocks   WEB: www.geminicollisionworks.com TWITTER: @AlthaarTweeting ‏and @LifeWithAlthaar  Optimized for best listening on earbuds or headphones.   Entire Production © 2019 Gemini CollisionWorks   Thank you for your attention; it is a pleasure working for you.   A Gemini CollisionWorks Production   EPISODE SCRIPT HERE!

In which an unfamiliar ship lands on The Fairgrounds, turning out to contain two "scien-technicians" from the species known as "The Luck Navigators," whose entire technology is based on riding waves of Luck and it's opposite, which they refer to by the technical term "Suck." Unfortunately, the extreme amount of suck on the station has trapped them, and chaos descends as The Fairgrounds is beset by events, large and small, of extreme good and bad fortune, which the Luck Navigators predict will end in a disastrous singularity, the Suckhole. Is John B actually at the center of it all, and is he empirically the unluckiest being in the galaxy? And will the impending disaster be averted if Commander Torianna blasts John out of an airlock? And how is this all affecting open mic night at The Electric Egg?     EPISODE FIVE "The Luck Navigators" written by Ian W. Hill and Berit Johnson   featuring Berit Johnson as Althaar, Alien Barfly, Bridge Crew John Amir as John B, Bridge Crew Ivanna Cullinan as Commander Torianna Alyssa Simon as Lieutenant-Commander Frallen-Br'ar, Helium Miner Chris Lee as Chip Frinkel, Helium Miner, Bridge Crew Zuri Washington as Delilah "Dee" Mallory Derrick Peterson as Xtopps, Helium Miner Amanda La Pergola as Mrs. Frondrinax with Ian W. Hill: Recreation DirectorBot, Announcer, Helium Miner, Bridge Crew David Arthur Bachrach:  Bridge Crew Linus Gelber: Docking Crew, Bridge Crew Lex Friedman: Bklgrhch Philip Cruise: Aoooaoooaoooaooo, Bridge Crew Jessica Stoya: Velbopp's Announcer Eli Ganias: Helium Miner, Bridge Crew     Berit is the supervising producer, showrunner, and script supervisor Ian is the audio producer, sound designer, and technical supervisor The writers’ room consists of Berit, Ian, John, Amanda, Chris, Philip, Lex, and Linus Special Thanks to Associate Suck Mathematician Sean Rockoff Theme and Interstitial Music composed and performed by Anna Stefanic  Illustration by Dean Haspiel Library Music and SFX licensed from Storyblocks   WEB: www.geminicollisionworks.com TWITTER: @AlthaarTweeting ‏and @LifeWithAlthaar  Optimized for best listening on earbuds or headphones.   Entire Production © 2019 Gemini CollisionWorks   Thank you for your attention; it is a pleasure working for you.   A Gemini CollisionWorks Production   EPISODE SCRIPT HERE!

In which family problems come to The Fairgrounds, as Xtopps turns out to have a surprising background, and duties he is expected to take on, peanut butter junkie or not, and John's estranged sister Susan is part of the diplomatic corps sent to handle the tricky Xbidont/League of Humans situation that is developing. Meanwhile, 3-D cribbage is played, Dee, with her backing band distracted, has to sing public domain karaoke, and MC Magnetopause takes over the egg with the old sounds of the 24th Century's hottest music craze, Dubwaltz.     EPISODE SIX "Blood Is Thicker Than Vacuum" written by Berit Johnson and Ian W. Hill   featuring Ivanna Cullinan as Commander Torianna Alyssa Simon as Lieutenant-Commander Frallen-Br'ar Derrick Peterson as Xtopps Eli Ganias as H.F. Berit Johnson as Althaar, Kwontz, Alien Barfly, Sopon Chris Lee as Chip Frinkel Amanda La Pergola as Mrs. Frondrinax, Vert John Amir as John B, Factotum, MC Magnetopause Zuri Washington as Delilah "Dee" Mallory with Olivia Baseman: TravelHub Announcer Philip Cruise: Bill Znaris Jessica Stoya: Susan Torkin Ian W. Hill: Announcer, Drunk Alien David Arthur Bachrach: His Bountiful Factotery Q’Fullin   Lex Friedman: The Most Serene Amplified High Notability, J’Yallen Dwan B’techer Men’Walz, Daughter of J’Bellent, House Byllaburt, of the Grand Duchy of Prang Leila Okafor: Customer RelationsBot Linus Gelber: Waitron   Berit is the supervising producer, showrunner, and script supervisor Ian is the audio producer, sound designer, and technical supervisor The writers’ room consists of Berit, Ian, John, Amanda, Chris, Philip, Lex, and Linus Theme and Interstitial Music composed and performed by Anna Stefanic  Illustration by Dean Haspiel Library Music and SFX licensed from Storyblocks   WEB: www.geminicollisionworks.com TWITTER: @AlthaarTweeting ‏and @LifeWithAlthaar  Optimized for best listening on earbuds or headphones.   Entire Production © 2019 Gemini CollisionWorks   Thank you for your attention; it is a pleasure working for you.   A Gemini CollisionWorks Production   EPISODE SCRIPT HERE!

In which disaster strikes The Fairgrounds (but doesn't it always?) when a mysterious incapacitating disease strikes every non-Human on the station - including the Robots - leaving a skeleton crew to try and run the HEC and cure the disease before life-support functions totally fail. Will the Humans do it before time runs out? What disgusting things does Human comfort food do to a sick lltorian? Will John B get a date with the amazonian Sanitation Fusilier of his dreams? And why is Andrew McCarthyBot not affected by the disease?     EPISODE SEVEN "The Infinity Contagion" written by Amanda La Pergola   featuring John Amir as John B Eli Ganias as H.F. Berit Johnson as Althaar, Sick Vent-Biter Ivanna Cullinan as Commander Torianna, Mary MallonBot Alyssa Simon as Lieutenant-Commander Frallen-Br'ar, Sarge Chris Lee as Chip Frinkel Zuri Washington as Delilah "Dee" Mallory, Dr. Lacerta Derrick Peterson as Xtopps  Amanda La Pergola as Mrs. Frondrinax with Ian W. Hill: Announcer, Recreation DirectorBot  Lex Friedman: Emma GoldmanBot Leila Okafor: Dr. Mwangi Philip Cruise: McCarthyBot 1 Linus Gelber: Rusty Fred Backus: Brick Anna Stefanic: Stella Jessica Stoya: HECNET Voice Olivia Baseman: McCarthyBot 2    Berit is the supervising producer, showrunner, and script supervisor Ian is the audio producer, sound designer, and technical supervisor The writers’ room consists of Berit, Ian, John, Amanda, Chris, Philip, Lex, and Linus Theme and Interstitial Music composed and performed by Anna Stefanic  Illustration by Dean Haspiel Library Music and SFX licensed from Storyblocks   WEB: www.geminicollisionworks.com TWITTER: @AlthaarTweeting ‏and @LifeWithAlthaar  Optimized for best listening on earbuds or headphones.   Entire Production © 2019 Gemini CollisionWorks   Thank you for your attention; it is a pleasure working for you.   A Gemini CollisionWorks Production   EPISODE SCRIPT HERE!

In which the Robot Union goes on strike, leaving The Fairgrounds in chaos, with, on top of it, most of the doors and panels saying insulting things about Commander Torianna in various Earth languages. John B, as a bridge between Humans and Robots, is conscripted by both sides to convince the other of the error of their ways. Meanwhile, with the power out and no access to more booze in The Electric Egg, adorable Fugulnari retiree plant-being Mrs. Frondrinax attempts to create a beer-brewing collective.     EPISODE EIGHT "Robot's Rules of Order" written by John Amir   featuring Chris Lee as Chip Frinkel, PacinoBot, Bridge Crew Ivanna Cullinan as Commander Torianna John Amir as John B Berit Johnson as Althaar, Norwegian Door, Bridge Crew, Sopon, Alien Barfly, French Terminal Eli Ganias as H.F. Amanda La Pergola as Mrs. Frondrinax, Spanish Door Alyssa Simon as Lieutenant-Commander Frallen-Br'ar, Sarge  Zuri Washington as Delilah "Dee" Mallory, Dr. Lacerta Derrick Peterson as Xtopps   with Jessica Stoya: Maintenance Announcer Linus Gelber: John C. CalhounBot, German Door, Bridge Crew, Italian Terminal, Patron 4, HoffaBot Rolls Andre: ForemanBot Lex Friedman: Terminal Voice, Mother JonesBot, Patron 6 Ian W. Hill: Announcer, ChurchillBot, WilhelmBot, Patron 8, Other ForemanBot Miyu Yakota: Japanese Door Olivia Baseman: Patron 1 David Arthur Bachrach: Patron 2 Fred Backus: Patron 3 Leila Okafor: Patron 5 Philip Cruise: Patron 7 Holly Pocket McCaffrey: ChildBot      Berit is the supervising producer, showrunner, and script supervisor Ian is the audio producer, sound designer, and technical supervisor The writers’ room consists of Berit, Ian, John, Amanda, Chris, Philip, Lex, and Linus Theme and Interstitial Music composed and performed by Anna Stefanic  Illustration by Dean Haspiel Library Music and SFX licensed from Storyblocks   WEB: www.geminicollisionworks.com TWITTER: @AlthaarTweeting ‏and @LifeWithAlthaar  Optimized for best listening on earbuds or headphones.   Entire Production © 2019 Gemini CollisionWorks   Thank you for your attention; it is a pleasure working for you.   A Gemini CollisionWorks Production   EPISODE SCRIPT HERE!    2IaJ7jq20HifUF91wQa8

In which we discover WHO is responsible for the pineapple juice that's filling up The Fairgrounds, WHAT Robots do for "tension relief," WHERE the zero-gravity Twister competition will be held if the pineapple juice can't be removed, WHEN the painfully shy Magnosians are able to mate, and HOW Althaar will learn about the "human sexing!" Answers involve weightless SCUBA diving among said pineapple juice, the exchange of vital internal parts, a lot of incredibly potent alcohol, and a much regretted favor.     EPISODE NINE "Everything Althaar Always Wanted to Know About Sex (but Humans Keep Running Away Before He Can Ask)" written by Chris Lee   featuring John Amir as John B Ivanna Cullinan as Commander Torianna Amanda La Pergola as Mrs. Frondrinax Berit Johnson as Althaar Chris Lee as Chip Frinkel Eli Ganias as H.F. Alyssa Simon as Lieutenant-Commander Frallen-Br'ar  Derrick Peterson as Xtopps, SurveyorBot Zuri Washington as Delilah "Dee" Mallory with Jessica Stoya: Princess Pancakes, Susan Olivia Baseman: Judy, Amber on the Bridge Anna Stefanic: Stella, MaidBot Ian W. Hill: Announcer, Recreation DirectorBot Lex Friedman: Door Voice, Bubbles Linus Gelber: PlummerBot  Philip Cruise: Magnosian   Berit is the supervising producer, showrunner, and script supervisor Ian is the audio producer, sound designer, and technical supervisor The writers’ room consists of Berit, Ian, John, Amanda, Chris, Philip, Lex, and Linus Theme and Interstitial Music composed and performed by Anna Stefanic  Illustration by Dean Haspiel Library Music and SFX licensed from Storyblocks   WEB: www.geminicollisionworks.com TWITTER: @AlthaarTweeting ‏and @LifeWithAlthaar  Optimized for best listening on earbuds or headphones.   Entire Production © 2019 Gemini CollisionWorks   Thank you for your attention; it is a pleasure working for you.   A Gemini CollisionWorks Production   EPISODE SCRIPT HERE! IDfUgKExV8G3qnI7nPcI

In which The Inspector calls and throws The Fairgrounds into (even more) chaos, StalinBot covets a jetpack, Althaar disguises himself as a nitrogen-fixing coolant processor, Mrs. Frondrinax amuses herself with gossip (and beats up a trash can), Cole Porter lyrics continue to offend or terminally confuse alien races, energy-being Lieutenant-Commander Frall tries out a new look (Stetson!), and we discover why you really, REALLY don't want to order the special at Sammy's Wiches.     EPISODE TEN "Our Man in the Fairgrounds" written by Linus Gelber   featuring Ivanna Cullinan as Commander Torianna, Check-This-Out Vendor Zuri Washington as Delilah "Dee" Mallory, Totally Legit Crew Member Berit Johnson as Althaar, Other Totally Legit Crew, Sopon, BankBot, Alien Pass Voice, Qwontz, Alien Barfly Eli Ganias as H.F., Shady Alien Chris Lee as Chip Frinkel, Litterer Derrick Peterson as Xtopps Amanda La Pergola as Mrs. Frondrinax, Vert John Amir as John B, Deals Dealer, Gordian Alyssa Simon as Lieutenant-Commander Frallen-Br'ar, I've-Got-The-Same-One Vendor with Linus Gelber: StalinBot, The Inspector Olivia Baseman: Amber on the Bridge, Fashion PoliceBot Ian W. Hill: Announcer, Recreation DirectorBot, CustomsBot, Trash Enforcer, Suspicious Alien Philip Cruise: Curious Shopper, Cpl. Dormer, Sammy, Misinformed Alien David Arthur Bachrach: Mine-Is-Purple Vendor, System Holly Pocket McCaffrey: Ashlee in Hydroponics Anna Stefanic: Other Person on the Bridge, Not-What-You-Think Merchant Lex Friedman: Peppy Advertising Barker, Door Voice Leila Okafor: English Pass Voice Jessica Stoya: Curly   Berit is the supervising producer, showrunner, and script supervisor Ian is the audio producer, sound designer, and technical supervisor The writers’ room consists of Berit, Ian, John, Amanda, Chris, Philip, Lex, and Linus Theme and Interstitial Music composed and performed by Anna Stefanic  Illustration by Dean Haspiel Library Music and SFX licensed from Storyblocks   WEB: www.geminicollisionworks.com TWITTER: @AlthaarTweeting ‏and @LifeWithAlthaar  Optimized for best listening on earbuds or headphones.   Entire Production © 2019 Gemini CollisionWorks   Thank you for your attention; it is a pleasure working for you.   A Gemini CollisionWorks Production   EPISODE SCRIPT HERE!

In which John B attempts a simple errand: returning the talking (and annoying) 3-headed "Cockathreece" that he was sent instead of the goldfish he wanted from one side of a station level to the other in under an hour. But of course, it's The Fairgrounds, which means a complicated set of detours around a scavenger hunt, broken elevators, threats from cookie-selling ScoutBots, a full-on battle between Sanitation Fusiliers and the deadly Vent Biters, an anti-gravity Twister match, and a rowboat trip to The Old Mill (who puts a lake in a space station?). All while enduring the insults of the relentless Cockathreece.     EPISODE ELEVEN "The Merciless Errand" written by John Amir and Lex Friedman   featuring Berit Johnson as Althaar, Hapless Customer, ScoutBot 2, Sopon, Alien Barfly, Paintball Player John Amir as John B Chris Lee as Chip Frinkel, STEMBro 2 Amanda La Pergola as Mrs. Frondrinax, Llama, Llama-Wrangler, Cockathreece 2 Zuri Washington as Delilah "Dee" Mallory, Shipping Bot, ScoutBot 3 Alyssa Simon as Lieutenant-Commander Frallen-Br'ar Ivanna Cullinan as Commander Torianna, Fidorian 2 Eli Ganias as H.F., Fidorian 3 Derrick Peterson as Xtopps with Ian W. Hill: Announcer, Recreation DirectorBot, Bronsonian, Another Hapless Customer, Scavenger 1, Cockathreece 3, Sanitation Worker 2, Winston ChurchillBot, Quarker Brothers Voice Leila Okafor: Travel Hub Voice Philip Cruise: STEMBro 1, Christopher WalkenBot, Scavenger 2, ScoutBot 1, Sanitation Worker 1 Linus Gelber: Cockathreece 1, Fidorian 1 Lex Friedman: Elevator Voice, Bubbles Rolls Andre: George ForemanBot Anna Stefanic: Capuloid Emissary, Stella David Arthur Bachrach: Montaguian Emissary, Old Caretaker Jessica Stoya: Scavenger 3   Berit is the supervising producer, showrunner, and script supervisor Ian is the audio producer, sound designer, and technical supervisor The writers’ room consists of Berit, Ian, John, Amanda, Chris, Philip, Lex, and Linus Theme and Interstitial Music composed and performed by Anna Stefanic  Illustration by Dean Haspiel Library Music and SFX licensed from Storyblocks   WEB: www.geminicollisionworks.com TWITTER: @AlthaarTweeting ‏and @LifeWithAlthaar  Optimized for best listening on earbuds or headphones.   Entire Production © 2019 Gemini CollisionWorks   Thank you for your attention; it is a pleasure working for you.   A Gemini CollisionWorks Production   EPISODE SCRIPT HERE!

In which is essayed A Very Special holiday episode, as Althaar wanders The Fairgrounds attempting to learn the True Meaning of Christmas so he can help his human friend John B, who is homesick for Earth. Along the way he learns about some of the many beliefs (or lack thereof) of the humans, robots, aliens, and energy beings of the station, while John sits in their apartment unsuccessfully trying to avoid Christmas media (except for making an alcohol-heavy holiday dessert).     EPISODE TWELVE "A Very Althaar Christmas" written by Berit Johnson   featuring John Amir as John B Berit Johnson as Althaar, Sharon, Recipe Voice 1, Sopon, Kwontz, Alien Barfly Amanda La Pergola as Mrs. Frondrinax Eli Ganias as H.F. Derrick Peterson as Xtopps Zuri Washington as Delilah "Dee" Mallory, Marie CurieBot Chris Lee as Chip Frinkel Alyssa Simon as Lieutenant-Commander Frallen-Br'ar Ivanna Cullinan as Commander Torianna with Linus Gelber: Groft, Dave, Tiny Tim 2, Nature Documentary Voice, Charles DickensBot, Martin LutherBot David Arthur Bachrach: Plarnk, Special Announcer, Financial Reporter Holly Pocket McCaffrey: Mubbet, Miss Sophie, Tiny Tim 1 Ian W. Hill: TV Announcer, Announcer, Familiar Space Smuggler, Recipe Voice 3 Jessica Stoya: Z'Wizzlinarp, Tiny Tim 3 Rolls Andre: George ForemanBot Anna Stefanic: Recipe Voice 2, Stella  Philip Cruise: Cpl. Dormer Lex Friedman: Bubbles   Berit is the supervising producer, showrunner, and script supervisor Ian is the audio producer, sound designer, and technical supervisor The writers’ room consists of Berit, Ian, John, Amanda, Chris, Philip, Lex, and Linus Theme and Interstitial Music composed and performed by Anna Stefanic  Holiday Music Arrangements by Berit and Anna Illustration by Dean Haspiel Library Music and SFX licensed from Storyblocks   WEB: www.geminicollisionworks.com TWITTER: @AlthaarTweeting ‏and @LifeWithAlthaar  Optimized for best listening on earbuds or headphones.   Entire Production © 2019 Gemini CollisionWorks   Thank you for your attention; it is a pleasure working for you.   A Gemini CollisionWorks Production   EPISODE SCRIPT HERE!

In which all the main characters are trapped in the disreputable bar The Electric Egg after their Christmas party when the security doors seal as several station-threatening disasters suddenly rampage. Between all of their various skills, and while stuck where they are, they must come up with a solution that will repair the tiny loose wire behind it all, which is on the other side of the station, before the Fairgrounds explodes or the residents are all eaten by the predatory xenomorphs that have emerged from their usual home in the vents. Meanwhile, the bar regulars are getting stir-crazy, and the entertainment options are limited.     EPISODE THIRTEEN "Mars Flies in a Klein Bottle" written by Ian W. Hill   featuring John Amir as John B Berit Johnson as Althaar, Sopon, Kwontz, Alien Barfly Eli Ganias as Hardyfox "H.F." Fornes Ivanna Cullinan as Commander Mindy Torianna Alyssa Simon as Lieutenant-Commander Frallen-Br'ar Chris Lee as Chip Frinkel Derrick Peterson as Xtopps Zuri Washington as Delilah "Dee" Mallory Amanda La Pergola as Mrs. Frondrinax with Lex Friedman: Crisis Announcement Voice, Bubbles Ian W. Hill: Announcer Philip Cruise: Cpl. Dormer Linus Gelber: Martin LutherBot   Rolls Andre: Drunk Alien Anna Stefanic: Stella    Berit is the supervising producer, showrunner, and script supervisor Ian is the audio producer, sound designer, and technical supervisor The writers’ room consists of Berit, Ian, John, Amanda, Chris, Philip, Lex, and Linus Theme and Interstitial Music composed and performed by Anna Stefanic  Additional Song Composition, Arrangement, and Performance by Berit and Ian Illustration by Dean Haspiel Library Music and SFX licensed from Storyblocks   WEB: www.geminicollisionworks.com TWITTER: @AlthaarTweeting ‏and @LifeWithAlthaar  Optimized for best listening on earbuds or headphones.   Entire Production © 2019 Gemini CollisionWorks   Thank you for your attention; it is a pleasure working for you.   A Gemini CollisionWorks Production   EPISODE SCRIPT HERE!

Hi folks. We just wanted to say hello before Season 2 of Life With Althaar begins next week. And also to be sure you're aware of where to find us online.  So here are all the links...   TWITTER: Life With Althaar Account Althaar's Personal Account! FACEBOOK: Gemini CollisionWorks Page INSTAGRAM: Ian/CollisionWorks Account TUMBLR: A Secret I'll Tell Nobody Never PODBEAN PATRON ACCOUNT: Donate to Life With Althaar here! FULL SHOW CREDITS: Our IMDb Page STORE: The Gemini CollisionWorks Store TAX-DEDUCTIBLE DONATIONS TO GCW: Our Fractured Atlas Page OUR RARELY-UPDATED COMPANY HOMEPAGE: Gemini CollisionWorks   We hope to see you around online, and that you enjoy where Season 2 of Life With Althaar takes you. Thank you for your attention, it is a pleasure working for you, Ian W. Hill & Berit Johnson Gemini CollisionWorks    

ALTHAAR'S VERY-SPECIAL FIRST-SEASON MUSICAL EP! music, lyrics, and dialogue by Ian W. Hill and Berit Johnson for Gemini CollisionWorks except "Credit Music," composed by Anna Stefanic and "Surfin' Bee," original music by Nikolai Rimsky-Korsakov   all arrangements by Berit Johnson produced, mixed, and engineered by Ian W. Hill   1.  Althaar Welcomes You! 2.  "Life With Althaar opening credit music (instrumental)" 3.  Althaar on Dee and Xtopps! 4.  "Danube Planum" 5.  Althaar on Xtopps's Audition! 6.  "Surfin' Bee" 7.  Althaar on Space Shanties! 8.  "Around the Rings of Saturn (excerpt)" 9.  Althaar Introduces a Duet! 10.  "Baby, It's a Vacuum Out There" 11.  Althaar Enjoys Interstellar Cultural Exchange! 12.  "The 38 Days of Qo'rqish (excerpt)" 13.  Althaar Doesn't Get a Joke, but Likes the Song Anyway! 14.  "Beyond Uranus" 15.  Althaar Thanks You and Says Goodbye for Now! 16.  "Life With Althaar closing credits music (instrumental)"   performed by Zuri Washington -- lead vocals (tracks 4, 10, 14) Derrick Peterson -- lead vocal (track 10); backing vocal (track 4) Anna Stefanic -- piano (tracks 1, 10, 16); additional synth (track 6) Ian W. Hill -- electric guitar (tracks 4, 14) Berit Johnson -- computer-programmed instruments (tracks 4, 6, 10, 14); Stylophone GEN X-1 (track 14); additional piano (track 14); Althaar with The Helium Freighter Crew Chorale (track 8):   Eli Ganias, Ian W. Hill, Chris Lee, Derrick Peterson & Alyssa Simon and most of the Life With Althaar cast as the Qo'rqish Lament Singers (track 12)   special thanks to Thomas C. for parodic advice   Entire Production © 2020 Gemini CollisionWorks

In which we return to The Fairgrounds after six months to find the crew apparently happier and in considerably less danger, with no life-threatening incidents having happened for many weeks, which of course means that no one is comfortable, everyone is bored or suspicious, and, given the normally disaster-prone station, all the residents are just waiting for the other shoe to drop. And during one work cycle, a number of crew members, worried about this strange lack of turmoil, individually take extra precautions against anything going wrong, resulting, of course, in an unexpected domino effect to an unpleasant conclusion.     EPISODE FOURTEEN "The Other Shoe" written by Ian W. Hill & Berit Johnson   featuring Berit Johnson as Althaar, Sopon, Alien Barfly, Cpl. Ness, Kwontz John Amir as John B Ivanna Cullinan as Commander Mindy Torianna Alyssa Simon as Lieutenant-Commander Frallen-Br'ar Eli Ganias as Hardyfox "H.F." Fornes Amanda La Pergola as Mrs. Frondrinax Chris Lee as Chip Frinkel Zuri Washington as Delilah "Dee" Mallory Derrick Peterson as Xtopps with Ian W. Hill: Announcer, William S. BurroughsBot, Large Mike Anna Stefanic: Stella Reyes Linus Gelber: StalinBot Holly Pockey McCaffrey: Miss Sophie Lex Friedman: Bubbles, Elevator Clara Francesca: Offspring Philip Cruise: Cpl. Dormer David Arthur Bachrach: Reassuring Announcer Fred Backus: Zanrak Jessica Stoya: Seled     Berit is the supervising producer, showrunner, and script supervisor Ian is the audio producer, sound designer, and technical supervisor The writers’ room consists of Berit, Ian, John, Amanda, Chris, Philip, Lex, and Linus Theme and Interstitial Music composed and performed by Anna Stefanic  Additional Song Composition, Arrangement, and Performance by Berit and Ian Illustration by Dean Haspiel Library Music and SFX licensed from Storyblocks   WEB: www.geminicollisionworks.com TWITTER: @AlthaarTweeting ‏and @LifeWithAlthaar  Optimized for best listening on earbuds or headphones.   Entire Production © 2020 Gemini CollisionWorks   Thank you for your attention; it is a pleasure working for you.   A Gemini CollisionWorks Production   EPISODE SCRIPT HERE!

In which The Syndicate comes to The Fairgrounds to make Chip Frinkel an offer he can't refuse concerning his bar, The Electric Egg: a seemingly innocent offer of a pool table. However, more turns out to be riding on the table, and a game of SuperNova on it, than first appears. Meanwhile, Althaar becomes addicted to binge-watching 21st-Century television shows.     EPISODE FIFTEEN "A Simple Game of SuperNova" written by Chris Lee   featuring Berit Johnson as Althaar, Sopon, Cpl. Ness, Commerical Bro 2, Alien Barfly Zuri Washington as Delilah "Dee" Mallory, Commercial Sexy Robot Derrick Peterson as Xtopps, Commercial Bro Chris Lee as Chip Frinkel John Amir as John B Ivanna Cullinan as Commander Mindy Torianna Alyssa Simon as Lieutenant-Commander Frallen-Br'ar Amanda La Pergola as Mrs. Frondrinax, Vert Eli Ganias as Hardyfox "H.F." Fornes with Jessica Stoya: Frank David Arthur Bachrach: Stuart, E-BOT Lex Friedman: Bubbles Ian W. Hill: Announcer, NERCA, William S. BurroughsBot, Bro Commercial, Dilurian 2, Kaiser WilhelmBot Olivia Baseman: Amber on the Bridge Linus Gelber: StalinBot, Sysco Philip Cruise: Cpl. Dormer, John McEnroeBot Holly Pocket McCaffrey: Miss Sophie, Dilurian 3 Anna Stefanic : Stella Reyes Fred Backus: Dilurian 4, Donald Escroc   Berit is the supervising producer, showrunner, and script supervisor Ian is the audio producer, sound designer, and technical supervisor The writers’ room consists of Berit, Ian, John, Amanda, Chris, Philip, Lex, and Linus Theme and Interstitial Music composed and performed by Anna Stefanic  Illustration by Dean Haspiel Library Music and SFX licensed from Storyblocks   WEB: www.geminicollisionworks.com TWITTER: @AlthaarTweeting ‏and @LifeWithAlthaar  Optimized for best listening on earbuds or headphones.   Entire Production © 2020 Gemini CollisionWorks   Thank you for your attention; it is a pleasure working for you.   A Gemini CollisionWorks Production   EPISODE SCRIPT HERE!   NB: A handful of early downloaders may have gotten an inferior version with one unfinished scene still left in the mix by accident. It's been corrected now, but hey, collectors' item!

In which Drop Time comes again to The Fairgrounds, though several newcomers to the station have no idea what this period -- when the station drops a certain amount of days from the calendar to get in line with Earth's -- means for them. For John B, it means his birthday is getting skipped, for Dee, it means a cruel prank regarding a non-binding contract, for the energy being Lt. Frall, it means trying to drink coffee and pouring it on the floor, and for most of the crew, it means a time to slack off and ignore all rules. An angry John B searches for the hidden Timekeeping Central department, to discover the secret of The Algorithm that decides when Drop Time occurs, while H.F. takes Dee on a tour of several secret places on the station only available to the public during Drop Time.     EPISODE SIXTEEN "Big Numbers and Little Science" written by Linus Gelber   featuring Berit Johnson as Althaar, Herbert, Sopon, Alien Barfly, Video Kid John Amir as John B, Sanitation Grunt, Video Kid Ivanna Cullinan as Commander Mindy Torianna Alyssa Simon as Lieutenant-Commander Frallen-Br'ar, Indistinct Caller Derrick Peterson as Xtopps, HECNET Responder, Alien Duck Chris Lee as Chip Frinkel, Barry the Pilot Zuri Washington as Delilah "Dee" Mallory, Video Kid Eli Ganias as Hardyfox "H.F." Fornes, Video Kid  Amanda La Pergola as Mrs. Frondrinax with Linus Gelber: PythagorasBot, Sanitation Grunt Philip Cruise: PhilolausBot, Sanitation Grunt Ian W. Hill: Announcer, Winston ChurchillBot, Sanitation Grunt, Birthday Alert, Video Kid, William S. BurroughsBot, Trash Detector Anna Stefanic : Stella Reyes Olivia Baseman: Amber on the Bridge Clara Francesca : Drop Time Educator   Berit is the supervising producer, showrunner, and script supervisor Ian is the audio producer, sound designer, and technical supervisor The writers’ room consists of Berit, Ian, John, Amanda, Chris, Philip, Lex, and Linus Theme and Interstitial Music composed and performed by Anna Stefanic  Illustration by Dean Haspiel Library Music and SFX licensed from Storyblocks   WEB: www.geminicollisionworks.com TWITTER: @AlthaarTweeting ‏and @LifeWithAlthaar  Optimized for best listening on earbuds or headphones.   Entire Production © 2020 Gemini CollisionWorks   Thank you for your attention; it is a pleasure working for you.   A Gemini CollisionWorks Production   EPISODE SCRIPT HERE!

In which the "Steves" from an annoying but highly motivated and skilled capitalist species, the Dilurians, come to The Fairgrounds, renting a downshifted and unused level, from which they proceed to wreak havoc across the entire space station. As their new business, Cadabra, expands rapidly from selling personalized smells, they begin, in less than a day, to gentrify across the station, wiping out all the beloved homegrown businesses and replacing them with more-convenient apps providing far worse service. On top of it, Commander Torianna discovers she will have to avert an actual massacre as the Dilurians attempt to expand into the sector of the Pudendar, a proud and exiled species of warrior artists uninterested in and offended by the commercial offerings.     EPISODE SEVENTEEN "The Sweet Smell of the Fairgrounds" written by Amanda La Pergola and Philip Cruise   featuring Zuri Washington as Delilah "Dee" Mallory, Docking Clerk, X.Z. Drachir Eli Ganias as Hardyfox "H.F." Fornes, Steve the First, Steve, Steve from BizLaunch, Party Steve Chris Lee as Chip Frinkel, Steve the Second, Tour Guide Steve, Steve the Final Alyssa Simon as Lieutenant-Commander Frallen-Br'ar, Steve-O Ivanna Cullinan as Commander Mindy Torianna John Amir as John B, Steve in Operations Berit Johnson as Althaar, Stevers, Sopon, Cpl. Ness, Steve from Admin Derrick Peterson as Xtopps, Steve-a-rino Amanda La Pergola as Mrs. Frondrinax, Steve in Legal, Ayn RandBot with Holly Pocket McCaffrey: Package Non-Recipient, Pudendari Attendant Philip Cruise: Christopher WalkenBot, Cpl. Dormer, Steve from Showcaine Lex Friedman: Smarmy Computer, Steven, Dating Service Drone Ian W. Hill: Announcer, Stevie, Jean-Claude, Kaiser WilhelmBot, Promo Drone, True Crime Comedian, Steve the Penultimate Olivia Baseman: Amber on the Bridge Rolls Andre: George ForemanBot, Restaurant Promo Leila Okafor: Officer Crveno, Showcaine P.A. Anna Stefanic : Stella Reyes, Pitch Video, Zyloxides fru Peplin David Arthur Bachrach: Steve from Integration, Falling-in-Love Drone, Pharma Steve Linus Gelber: Steve from HR, StalinBot, Awesome Steve Fred Backus: Steve from Tech Support, Big Steve Clara Francesca : Offspring, Queen Westellernta of the Pudendari   Berit is the supervising producer, showrunner, and script supervisor Ian is the audio producer, sound designer, and technical supervisor The writers’ room consists of Berit, Ian, John, Amanda, Chris, Philip, Lex, and Linus Theme and Interstitial Music composed and performed by Anna Stefanic  Illustration by Dean Haspiel Library Music and SFX licensed from Storyblocks   WEB: www.geminicollisionworks.com TWITTER: @AlthaarTweeting ‏and @LifeWithAlthaar Optimized for best listening on earbuds or headphones.   Entire Production © 2020 Gemini CollisionWorks   Thank you for your attention; it is a pleasure working for you.   A Gemini CollisionWorks Production   EPISODE SCRIPT HERE!

In which John B, on yet another boring and routine EVA mission to fix a very small wire on the outside of The Fairgrounds, is sent hurling away from the space station by a chance explosion. As John and the bridge crew attempt in vain to find a way to bring him back (that won't kill him), all of his other friends on The Fairgrounds show up on the bridge to say hello (for no logical reason), and John suspects that, despite their assurances, it's really to say a very final goodbye. And for some reason or reasons, neither Frall nor Althaar seem to be around.     EPISODE EIGHTEEN "Space Hat with Air" written by Ian W. Hill   featuring John Amir as John B Ivanna Cullinan as Commander Mindy Torianna Eli Ganias as Hardyfox "H.F." Fornes Amanda La Pergola as Mrs. Frondrinax, Vert Berit Johnson as Althaar, Cpl. Ness, Sopon, Alien Barfly, Kwontz Chris Lee as Chip Frinkel Zuri Washington as Delilah "Dee" Mallory Derrick Peterson as Xtopps    Alyssa Simon as Lieutenant-Commander Frallen-Br'ar with Linus Gelber: StalinBot Olivia Baseman: Amber on the Bridge Ian W. Hill: Announcer Holly Pocket McCaffrey: Miss Sophie Rolls Andre: Werner HerzogBot Philip Cruise: Cpl. Dormer Lex Friedman: Bubbles Anna Stefanic : Stella Reyes   Berit is the supervising producer, showrunner, and script supervisor Ian is the audio producer, sound designer, and technical supervisor The writers’ room consists of Berit, Ian, John, Amanda, Chris, Philip, Lex, and Linus Theme and Interstitial Music composed and performed by Anna Stefanic  Illustration by Dean Haspiel Library Music and SFX licensed from Storyblocks   WEB: www.geminicollisionworks.com TWITTER: @AlthaarTweeting ‏and @LifeWithAlthaar Optimized for best listening on earbuds or headphones.   Entire Production © 2020 Gemini CollisionWorks   Thank you for your attention; it is a pleasure working for you.   A Gemini CollisionWorks Production   EPISODE SCRIPT HERE!