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Life With Althaar
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Life With Althaar
Author: Gemini CollisionWorks
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Description
An epic science-fiction sitcom for your ears about an unlikely human/alien friendship in the unluckiest place in Human space.
It is the mid-26th Century. John B, a humble repairman and ”former human” (having lost his legal status as such), has left the Earth for mysterious reasons. He is perhaps the unluckiest being in Human space.
He has wound up at the Human Exchange Concourse, or the ”HEC,” once the site of Humanity’s First Galactic Fair. It was the biggest flop in Human history. ”The Fairgrounds” is perhaps the unluckiest place in Human space. You don’t go there, you end up there.
John’s luck seems to have changed when he gets a good apartment at an amazingly reasonable price only to find his roommate is Althaar, an Iltorian, who is determined to befriend a Human. (Iltorians are the kindest, nicest species in all known space, and natural diplomats, beloved by almost all, but their slightest presence causes Humans to instinctively respond with panic, fear, disgust, nausea, and loss of bodily functions).
Can a Human and Iltorian live together without one of them driving the other crazy?
It is the mid-26th Century. John B, a humble repairman and ”former human” (having lost his legal status as such), has left the Earth for mysterious reasons. He is perhaps the unluckiest being in Human space.
He has wound up at the Human Exchange Concourse, or the ”HEC,” once the site of Humanity’s First Galactic Fair. It was the biggest flop in Human history. ”The Fairgrounds” is perhaps the unluckiest place in Human space. You don’t go there, you end up there.
John’s luck seems to have changed when he gets a good apartment at an amazingly reasonable price only to find his roommate is Althaar, an Iltorian, who is determined to befriend a Human. (Iltorians are the kindest, nicest species in all known space, and natural diplomats, beloved by almost all, but their slightest presence causes Humans to instinctively respond with panic, fear, disgust, nausea, and loss of bodily functions).
Can a Human and Iltorian live together without one of them driving the other crazy?
37 Episodes
Reverse
In which John B. arrives at The Fairgrounds, a space station in the Teegarden's System commonly known as the unluckiest place in Human space, and finds himself living with Althaar, the nicest being you'd ever want to meet, from a species whose very presence in any way causes Humans to react instinctively with fear, panic, and nausea. As John goes about his new day and job on the Fairgrounds, he meets many of the other beings who have wound up there, and discovers that even the simplest day-to-day existence on the station is basically a death-defying act.
EPISODE ONE
"Welcome to the Fairgrounds"
written by Ian W. Hill & Berit Johnson
featuring
John Amir as John B
Berit Johnson as Althaar, Bridge Crew, Security Guard #2, Sopon
Eli Ganias as Hardyfox "H.F." Fornes
Alyssa Simon as Lieutenant-Commander Frallen-Br'ar
Ivanna Cullinan as Commander Torianna, Galaxbudget Passenger
Amanda La Pergola as Mrs. Frondrinax
Chris Lee as Chip Frinkel, GalaxBudget Passenger
Zuri Washington as Delilah "Dee" Mallory, Bridge Crew
with
Ian W. Hill: Announcer, CustomsBot, Welcome Video Voice, Bridge Crew, Recreation DirectorBot, Drunk Alien
Olivia Baseman: GalaxBudget Voice, Amber on the Bridge
Linus Gelber: CabinBot, RoboMechanic, Bridge Crew
Anna Stefanic: GalaxBudget Passenger
Jessica Stoya: HECNET Voice, Bridge Crew
Fred Backus: Flux Abondante, smuggler
Philip Cruise: Helpful Alien, Security Guard #1, Bridge Crew
Lex Friedman: Voice of Fairgrounds, Vape Emporium Announcer
Derrick Peterson: Bridge Crew
Berit is the supervising producer, showrunner, and script supervisor
Ian is the audio producer, sound designer, and technical supervisor
The writers’ room consists of Berit, Ian, John, Amanda, Chris, Philip, Lex, and Linus
Theme and Interstitial Music composed and performed by Anna Stefanic
Illustration by Dean Haspiel
Library Music and SFX licensed from Storyblocks
WEB: www.geminicollisionworks.com -- TWITTER: @AlthaarTweeting and @LifeWithAlthaar
Optimized for best listening on earbuds or headphones.
Entire Production © 2019 Gemini CollisionWorks
Thank you for your attention; it is a pleasure working for you.
A Gemini CollisionWorks Production
EPISODE SCRIPT HERE!
In which Dee's backup band at The Electric Egg leaves The Fairgrounds, and Dee learns to her horror why you should always sign a contract based on local time. Althaar attempts to get closer to his new roommate John B through meditation, with disastrous results. And a new Xbidont musician, a 12-armed virtuoso on 5 instruments at once, arrives on station, and may be the answer to at least one of Dee's problems, if only he weren't, like so many of his species, a peanut butter junkie.
EPISODE TWO
"Asymmetry in Band Structure Theory"
written by Philip Cruise
featuring
Ivanna Cullinan as Commander Torianna, Safety DirectorBot
Alyssa Simon as Lieutenant-Commander Frallen-Br'ar
Berit Johnson as Althaar, Security Guard #2, Drunk Alien, Sopon
Zuri Washington as Delilah "Dee" Mallory
Chris Lee as Chip Frinkel
Eli Ganias as Hardyfox "H.F." Fornes, Q'Crudup
John Amir as John B, Diego, Busted Xbidont
Derrick Peterson as Xtopps
Amanda La Pergola as Mrs. Frondrinax, Vert
with
Lex Friedman: RVD Krankor Communications
Fred Backus: Ensign Rose
Philip Cruise: Security Guard #1, Tiny Bill Tremaine
Ian W. Hill: Announcer, Ziggy, CustomsBot, Shlooma, Park InfoBot
Olivia Baseman: Charles Stringus
Leila Okafor: Transit Hub Announcement
Anna Stefanic: Gate Welcome Voice
Holly Pocket McCaffrey: Hydroponics Park Voice
Linus Gelber: Youth Hostel Kid
Berit is the supervising producer, showrunner, and script supervisor
Ian is the audio producer, sound designer, and technical supervisor
The writers’ room consists of Berit, Ian, John, Amanda, Chris, Philip, Lex, and Linus
Theme and Interstitial Music composed and performed by Anna Stefanic
Songs composed, arranged, and programmed by Berit
with help from Ian and Anna
Illustration by Dean Haspiel
Library Music and SFX licensed from Storyblocks
WEB: www.geminicollisionworks.com -- TWITTER: @AlthaarTweeting and @LifeWithAlthaar
Optimized for best listening on earbuds or headphones.
Entire Production © 2019 Gemini CollisionWorks
Thank you for your attention; it is a pleasure working for you.
A Gemini CollisionWorks Production
EPISODE SCRIPT HERE!
In which the omnipresent (and possibly omnipotent), multidimensional Lt. Frall chooses to finally take some time off, but sends a future version of themself back in time to take their place and be present again when The Fairgrounds' senior staff is visited by The Fidorians, a friendly, dog-like species that turns out to have a surprisingly dark side, as the demand the return of an unknown item known to be on the station. Perhaps Sherlock HolmesBot and his associate Veronica Gardens can help find the mysterious mcguffin. Meanwhile, The Electric Egg runs afoul of the all-powerful Musicians Union, and must placate their rep, Mo Stolber, if they don't want to be shut down.
EPISODE THREE
"Such Stuff as Dreams"
written by Linus Gelber
featuring
John Amir as John B
Berit Johnson as Althaar, Transit Voice, Customs Officer, Sopon, Kwontz
Derrick Peterson as Xtopps, HECNET Voice
Ivanna Cullinan as Commander Torianna, Safety DirectorBot
Alyssa Simon as Lieutenant-Commander Frallen-Br'ar, PA Voice
Eli Ganias as Hardyfox "H.F." Fornes, HTA Voice
Amanda La Pergola as Mrs. Frondrinax, Transit Voice, Customs Officer
Zuri Washington as Delilah "Dee" Mallory, Transit Hub Voice
Chris Lee as Chip Frinkel
with
David Arthur Bachrach: Crazy Caller, Rex
Linus Gelber: CommsBot, Mo Stolber, Radio DJ
Ian W. Hill: Announcer, Recreation DirectorBot, Sherlock HolmesBot, Customs Officer
Lex Friedman: Transit Voice, Veronica Gardens, Door Voice
Jessica Stoya: Completely Innocent Not-a-Smuggler Traveler
Olivia Baseman: Amber on the Bridge
Dean Haspiel: Hunter the Fidorian
Leila Okafor: Fidorian Movie Narration
Philip Cruise: Tactical Officer
Berit is the supervising producer, showrunner, and script supervisor
Ian is the audio producer, sound designer, and technical supervisor
The writers’ room consists of Berit, Ian, John, Amanda, Chris, Philip, Lex, and Linus
Theme and Interstitial Music composed and performed by Anna Stefanic
Songs composed, arranged, and programmed by Berit
with help from Ian and Anna
Illustration by Dean Haspiel
Library Music and SFX licensed from Storyblocks
WEB: www.geminicollisionworks.com -- TWITTER: @AlthaarTweeting and @LifeWithAlthaar
Optimized for best listening on earbuds or headphones.
Entire Production © 2019 Gemini CollisionWorks
Thank you for your attention; it is a pleasure working for you.
A Gemini CollisionWorks Production
EPISODE SCRIPT HERE!
In which a disaster strikes that threatens the entire station, but the robots morally won't fix it because of union rules, and humans legally can't fix it because it will kill them. Unfortunately, it turns out that John B, due to his mysterious past, falls under neither of these categories fully, and is required to perform the repair even though it will kill him. Can he figure out a solution that will keep him alive and get the repair fixed in time? And will Althaar's attempts to relax him through massage and a new Jacuzzi have any effect on his mood?
EPISODE FOUR
"B, Robot"
written by John Amir and Lex Friedman
featuring
Alyssa Simon as Lieutenant-Commander Frallen-Br'ar, Commissary Voice
Ivanna Cullinan as Commander Torianna
Chris Lee as Chip Frinkel
John Amir as John B
Berit Johnson as Althaar, Alien Barfly
Derrick Peterson as Xtopps
Eli Ganias as Hardyfox "H.F." Fornes
Amanda La Pergola as Mrs. Frondrinax
Zuri Washington as Delilah "Dee" Mallory
with
Ian W. Hill: Recreation DirectorBot, Announcer, Winston ChurchillBot
Fred Backus: Systems Chief Rojas
Philip Cruise: J. Edgar HooverBot
Lex Friedman: Station Voice, Mother JonesBot
Leila Okafor: Conference Room Voice
Holly Pocket McCaffrey: Hydroponics Voice
David Arthur Bachrach: Class TraitorBot
Dean Haspiel: Working StiffBot, Fast Food Customer
Linus Gelber: Jimmy HoffaBot
Berit is the supervising producer, showrunner, and script supervisor
Ian is the audio producer, sound designer, and technical supervisor
The writers’ room consists of Berit, Ian, John, Amanda, Chris, Philip, Lex, and Linus
Theme and Interstitial Music composed and performed by Anna Stefanic
Illustration by Dean Haspiel
Library Music and SFX licensed from Storyblocks
WEB: www.geminicollisionworks.com
TWITTER: @AlthaarTweeting and @LifeWithAlthaar
Optimized for best listening on earbuds or headphones.
Entire Production © 2019 Gemini CollisionWorks
Thank you for your attention; it is a pleasure working for you.
A Gemini CollisionWorks Production
EPISODE SCRIPT HERE!
In which an unfamiliar ship lands on The Fairgrounds, turning out to contain two "scien-technicians" from the species known as "The Luck Navigators," whose entire technology is based on riding waves of Luck and it's opposite, which they refer to by the technical term "Suck." Unfortunately, the extreme amount of suck on the station has trapped them, and chaos descends as The Fairgrounds is beset by events, large and small, of extreme good and bad fortune, which the Luck Navigators predict will end in a disastrous singularity, the Suckhole. Is John B actually at the center of it all, and is he empirically the unluckiest being in the galaxy? And will the impending disaster be averted if Commander Torianna blasts John out of an airlock? And how is this all affecting open mic night at The Electric Egg?
EPISODE FIVE
"The Luck Navigators"
written by Ian W. Hill and Berit Johnson
featuring
Berit Johnson as Althaar, Alien Barfly, Bridge Crew
John Amir as John B, Bridge Crew
Ivanna Cullinan as Commander Torianna
Alyssa Simon as Lieutenant-Commander Frallen-Br'ar, Helium Miner
Chris Lee as Chip Frinkel, Helium Miner, Bridge Crew
Zuri Washington as Delilah "Dee" Mallory
Derrick Peterson as Xtopps, Helium Miner
Amanda La Pergola as Mrs. Frondrinax
with
Ian W. Hill: Recreation DirectorBot, Announcer, Helium Miner, Bridge Crew
David Arthur Bachrach: Bridge Crew
Linus Gelber: Docking Crew, Bridge Crew
Lex Friedman: Bklgrhch
Philip Cruise: Aoooaoooaoooaooo, Bridge Crew
Jessica Stoya: Velbopp's Announcer
Eli Ganias: Helium Miner, Bridge Crew
Berit is the supervising producer, showrunner, and script supervisor
Ian is the audio producer, sound designer, and technical supervisor
The writers’ room consists of Berit, Ian, John, Amanda, Chris, Philip, Lex, and Linus
Special Thanks to Associate Suck Mathematician Sean Rockoff
Theme and Interstitial Music composed and performed by Anna Stefanic
Illustration by Dean Haspiel
Library Music and SFX licensed from Storyblocks
WEB: www.geminicollisionworks.com
TWITTER: @AlthaarTweeting and @LifeWithAlthaar
Optimized for best listening on earbuds or headphones.
Entire Production © 2019 Gemini CollisionWorks
Thank you for your attention; it is a pleasure working for you.
A Gemini CollisionWorks Production
EPISODE SCRIPT HERE!
In which family problems come to The Fairgrounds, as Xtopps turns out to have a surprising background, and duties he is expected to take on, peanut butter junkie or not, and John's estranged sister Susan is part of the diplomatic corps sent to handle the tricky Xbidont/League of Humans situation that is developing. Meanwhile, 3-D cribbage is played, Dee, with her backing band distracted, has to sing public domain karaoke, and MC Magnetopause takes over the egg with the old sounds of the 24th Century's hottest music craze, Dubwaltz.
EPISODE SIX
"Blood Is Thicker Than Vacuum"
written by Berit Johnson and Ian W. Hill
featuring
Ivanna Cullinan as Commander Torianna
Alyssa Simon as Lieutenant-Commander Frallen-Br'ar
Derrick Peterson as Xtopps
Eli Ganias as H.F.
Berit Johnson as Althaar, Kwontz, Alien Barfly, Sopon
Chris Lee as Chip Frinkel
Amanda La Pergola as Mrs. Frondrinax, Vert
John Amir as John B, Factotum, MC Magnetopause
Zuri Washington as Delilah "Dee" Mallory
with
Olivia Baseman: TravelHub Announcer
Philip Cruise: Bill Znaris
Jessica Stoya: Susan Torkin
Ian W. Hill: Announcer, Drunk Alien
David Arthur Bachrach: His Bountiful Factotery Q’Fullin
Lex Friedman: The Most Serene Amplified High Notability, J’Yallen Dwan B’techer Men’Walz, Daughter of J’Bellent, House Byllaburt, of the Grand Duchy of Prang
Leila Okafor: Customer RelationsBot
Linus Gelber: Waitron
Berit is the supervising producer, showrunner, and script supervisor
Ian is the audio producer, sound designer, and technical supervisor
The writers’ room consists of Berit, Ian, John, Amanda, Chris, Philip, Lex, and Linus
Theme and Interstitial Music composed and performed by Anna Stefanic
Illustration by Dean Haspiel
Library Music and SFX licensed from Storyblocks
WEB: www.geminicollisionworks.com
TWITTER: @AlthaarTweeting and @LifeWithAlthaar
Optimized for best listening on earbuds or headphones.
Entire Production © 2019 Gemini CollisionWorks
Thank you for your attention; it is a pleasure working for you.
A Gemini CollisionWorks Production
EPISODE SCRIPT HERE!
In which disaster strikes The Fairgrounds (but doesn't it always?) when a mysterious incapacitating disease strikes every non-Human on the station - including the Robots - leaving a skeleton crew to try and run the HEC and cure the disease before life-support functions totally fail. Will the Humans do it before time runs out? What disgusting things does Human comfort food do to a sick lltorian? Will John B get a date with the amazonian Sanitation Fusilier of his dreams? And why is Andrew McCarthyBot not affected by the disease?
EPISODE SEVEN
"The Infinity Contagion"
written by Amanda La Pergola
featuring
John Amir as John B
Eli Ganias as H.F.
Berit Johnson as Althaar, Sick Vent-Biter
Ivanna Cullinan as Commander Torianna, Mary MallonBot
Alyssa Simon as Lieutenant-Commander Frallen-Br'ar, Sarge
Chris Lee as Chip Frinkel
Zuri Washington as Delilah "Dee" Mallory, Dr. Lacerta
Derrick Peterson as Xtopps
Amanda La Pergola as Mrs. Frondrinax
with
Ian W. Hill: Announcer, Recreation DirectorBot
Lex Friedman: Emma GoldmanBot
Leila Okafor: Dr. Mwangi
Philip Cruise: McCarthyBot 1
Linus Gelber: Rusty
Fred Backus: Brick
Anna Stefanic: Stella
Jessica Stoya: HECNET Voice
Olivia Baseman: McCarthyBot 2
Berit is the supervising producer, showrunner, and script supervisor
Ian is the audio producer, sound designer, and technical supervisor
The writers’ room consists of Berit, Ian, John, Amanda, Chris, Philip, Lex, and Linus
Theme and Interstitial Music composed and performed by Anna Stefanic
Illustration by Dean Haspiel
Library Music and SFX licensed from Storyblocks
WEB: www.geminicollisionworks.com
TWITTER: @AlthaarTweeting and @LifeWithAlthaar
Optimized for best listening on earbuds or headphones.
Entire Production © 2019 Gemini CollisionWorks
Thank you for your attention; it is a pleasure working for you.
A Gemini CollisionWorks Production
EPISODE SCRIPT HERE!
In which the Robot Union goes on strike, leaving The Fairgrounds in chaos, with, on top of it, most of the doors and panels saying insulting things about Commander Torianna in various Earth languages. John B, as a bridge between Humans and Robots, is conscripted by both sides to convince the other of the error of their ways. Meanwhile, with the power out and no access to more booze in The Electric Egg, adorable Fugulnari retiree plant-being Mrs. Frondrinax attempts to create a beer-brewing collective.
EPISODE EIGHT
"Robot's Rules of Order"
written by John Amir
featuring
Chris Lee as Chip Frinkel, PacinoBot, Bridge Crew
Ivanna Cullinan as Commander Torianna
John Amir as John B
Berit Johnson as Althaar, Norwegian Door, Bridge Crew, Sopon, Alien Barfly, French Terminal
Eli Ganias as H.F.
Amanda La Pergola as Mrs. Frondrinax, Spanish Door
Alyssa Simon as Lieutenant-Commander Frallen-Br'ar, Sarge
Zuri Washington as Delilah "Dee" Mallory, Dr. Lacerta
Derrick Peterson as Xtopps
with
Jessica Stoya: Maintenance Announcer
Linus Gelber: John C. CalhounBot, German Door, Bridge Crew, Italian Terminal, Patron 4, HoffaBot
Rolls Andre: ForemanBot
Lex Friedman: Terminal Voice, Mother JonesBot, Patron 6
Ian W. Hill: Announcer, ChurchillBot, WilhelmBot, Patron 8, Other ForemanBot
Miyu Yakota: Japanese Door
Olivia Baseman: Patron 1
David Arthur Bachrach: Patron 2
Fred Backus: Patron 3
Leila Okafor: Patron 5
Philip Cruise: Patron 7
Holly Pocket McCaffrey: ChildBot
Berit is the supervising producer, showrunner, and script supervisor
Ian is the audio producer, sound designer, and technical supervisor
The writers’ room consists of Berit, Ian, John, Amanda, Chris, Philip, Lex, and Linus
Theme and Interstitial Music composed and performed by Anna Stefanic
Illustration by Dean Haspiel
Library Music and SFX licensed from Storyblocks
WEB: www.geminicollisionworks.com
TWITTER: @AlthaarTweeting and @LifeWithAlthaar
Optimized for best listening on earbuds or headphones.
Entire Production © 2019 Gemini CollisionWorks
Thank you for your attention; it is a pleasure working for you.
A Gemini CollisionWorks Production
EPISODE SCRIPT HERE!
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In which we discover WHO is responsible for the pineapple juice that's filling up The Fairgrounds, WHAT Robots do for "tension relief," WHERE the zero-gravity Twister competition will be held if the pineapple juice can't be removed, WHEN the painfully shy Magnosians are able to mate, and HOW Althaar will learn about the "human sexing!" Answers involve weightless SCUBA diving among said pineapple juice, the exchange of vital internal parts, a lot of incredibly potent alcohol, and a much regretted favor.
EPISODE NINE
"Everything Althaar Always Wanted to Know About Sex
(but Humans Keep Running Away Before He Can Ask)"
written by Chris Lee
featuring
John Amir as John B
Ivanna Cullinan as Commander Torianna
Amanda La Pergola as Mrs. Frondrinax
Berit Johnson as Althaar
Chris Lee as Chip Frinkel
Eli Ganias as H.F.
Alyssa Simon as Lieutenant-Commander Frallen-Br'ar
Derrick Peterson as Xtopps, SurveyorBot
Zuri Washington as Delilah "Dee" Mallory
with
Jessica Stoya: Princess Pancakes, Susan
Olivia Baseman: Judy, Amber on the Bridge
Anna Stefanic: Stella, MaidBot
Ian W. Hill: Announcer, Recreation DirectorBot
Lex Friedman: Door Voice, Bubbles
Linus Gelber: PlummerBot
Philip Cruise: Magnosian
Berit is the supervising producer, showrunner, and script supervisor
Ian is the audio producer, sound designer, and technical supervisor
The writers’ room consists of Berit, Ian, John, Amanda, Chris, Philip, Lex, and Linus
Theme and Interstitial Music composed and performed by Anna Stefanic
Illustration by Dean Haspiel
Library Music and SFX licensed from Storyblocks
WEB: www.geminicollisionworks.com
TWITTER: @AlthaarTweeting and @LifeWithAlthaar
Optimized for best listening on earbuds or headphones.
Entire Production © 2019 Gemini CollisionWorks
Thank you for your attention; it is a pleasure working for you.
A Gemini CollisionWorks Production
EPISODE SCRIPT HERE!
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In which The Inspector calls and throws The Fairgrounds into (even more) chaos, StalinBot covets a jetpack, Althaar disguises himself as a nitrogen-fixing coolant processor, Mrs. Frondrinax amuses herself with gossip (and beats up a trash can), Cole Porter lyrics continue to offend or terminally confuse alien races, energy-being Lieutenant-Commander Frall tries out a new look (Stetson!), and we discover why you really, REALLY don't want to order the special at Sammy's Wiches.
EPISODE TEN
"Our Man in the Fairgrounds"
written by Linus Gelber
featuring
Ivanna Cullinan as Commander Torianna, Check-This-Out Vendor
Zuri Washington as Delilah "Dee" Mallory, Totally Legit Crew Member
Berit Johnson as Althaar, Other Totally Legit Crew, Sopon, BankBot, Alien Pass Voice, Qwontz, Alien Barfly
Eli Ganias as H.F., Shady Alien
Chris Lee as Chip Frinkel, Litterer
Derrick Peterson as Xtopps
Amanda La Pergola as Mrs. Frondrinax, Vert
John Amir as John B, Deals Dealer, Gordian
Alyssa Simon as Lieutenant-Commander Frallen-Br'ar, I've-Got-The-Same-One Vendor
with
Linus Gelber: StalinBot, The Inspector
Olivia Baseman: Amber on the Bridge, Fashion PoliceBot
Ian W. Hill: Announcer, Recreation DirectorBot, CustomsBot, Trash Enforcer, Suspicious Alien
Philip Cruise: Curious Shopper, Cpl. Dormer, Sammy, Misinformed Alien
David Arthur Bachrach: Mine-Is-Purple Vendor, System
Holly Pocket McCaffrey: Ashlee in Hydroponics
Anna Stefanic: Other Person on the Bridge, Not-What-You-Think Merchant
Lex Friedman: Peppy Advertising Barker, Door Voice
Leila Okafor: English Pass Voice
Jessica Stoya: Curly
Berit is the supervising producer, showrunner, and script supervisor
Ian is the audio producer, sound designer, and technical supervisor
The writers’ room consists of Berit, Ian, John, Amanda, Chris, Philip, Lex, and Linus
Theme and Interstitial Music composed and performed by Anna Stefanic
Illustration by Dean Haspiel
Library Music and SFX licensed from Storyblocks
WEB: www.geminicollisionworks.com
TWITTER: @AlthaarTweeting and @LifeWithAlthaar
Optimized for best listening on earbuds or headphones.
Entire Production © 2019 Gemini CollisionWorks
Thank you for your attention; it is a pleasure working for you.
A Gemini CollisionWorks Production
EPISODE SCRIPT HERE!
In which John B attempts a simple errand: returning the talking (and annoying) 3-headed "Cockathreece" that he was sent instead of the goldfish he wanted from one side of a station level to the other in under an hour. But of course, it's The Fairgrounds, which means a complicated set of detours around a scavenger hunt, broken elevators, threats from cookie-selling ScoutBots, a full-on battle between Sanitation Fusiliers and the deadly Vent Biters, an anti-gravity Twister match, and a rowboat trip to The Old Mill (who puts a lake in a space station?). All while enduring the insults of the relentless Cockathreece.
EPISODE ELEVEN
"The Merciless Errand"
written by John Amir and Lex Friedman
featuring
Berit Johnson as Althaar, Hapless Customer, ScoutBot 2, Sopon, Alien Barfly, Paintball Player
John Amir as John B
Chris Lee as Chip Frinkel, STEMBro 2
Amanda La Pergola as Mrs. Frondrinax, Llama, Llama-Wrangler, Cockathreece 2
Zuri Washington as Delilah "Dee" Mallory, Shipping Bot, ScoutBot 3
Alyssa Simon as Lieutenant-Commander Frallen-Br'ar
Ivanna Cullinan as Commander Torianna, Fidorian 2
Eli Ganias as H.F., Fidorian 3
Derrick Peterson as Xtopps
with
Ian W. Hill: Announcer, Recreation DirectorBot, Bronsonian, Another Hapless Customer, Scavenger 1,
Cockathreece 3, Sanitation Worker 2, Winston ChurchillBot, Quarker Brothers Voice
Leila Okafor: Travel Hub Voice
Philip Cruise: STEMBro 1, Christopher WalkenBot, Scavenger 2, ScoutBot 1, Sanitation Worker 1
Linus Gelber: Cockathreece 1, Fidorian 1
Lex Friedman: Elevator Voice, Bubbles
Rolls Andre: George ForemanBot
Anna Stefanic: Capuloid Emissary, Stella
David Arthur Bachrach: Montaguian Emissary, Old Caretaker
Jessica Stoya: Scavenger 3
Berit is the supervising producer, showrunner, and script supervisor
Ian is the audio producer, sound designer, and technical supervisor
The writers’ room consists of Berit, Ian, John, Amanda, Chris, Philip, Lex, and Linus
Theme and Interstitial Music composed and performed by Anna Stefanic
Illustration by Dean Haspiel
Library Music and SFX licensed from Storyblocks
WEB: www.geminicollisionworks.com
TWITTER: @AlthaarTweeting and @LifeWithAlthaar
Optimized for best listening on earbuds or headphones.
Entire Production © 2019 Gemini CollisionWorks
Thank you for your attention; it is a pleasure working for you.
A Gemini CollisionWorks Production
EPISODE SCRIPT HERE!
In which is essayed A Very Special holiday episode, as Althaar wanders The Fairgrounds attempting to learn the True Meaning of Christmas so he can help his human friend John B, who is homesick for Earth. Along the way he learns about some of the many beliefs (or lack thereof) of the humans, robots, aliens, and energy beings of the station, while John sits in their apartment unsuccessfully trying to avoid Christmas media (except for making an alcohol-heavy holiday dessert).
EPISODE TWELVE
"A Very Althaar Christmas"
written by Berit Johnson
featuring
John Amir as John B
Berit Johnson as Althaar, Sharon, Recipe Voice 1, Sopon, Kwontz, Alien Barfly
Amanda La Pergola as Mrs. Frondrinax
Eli Ganias as H.F.
Derrick Peterson as Xtopps
Zuri Washington as Delilah "Dee" Mallory, Marie CurieBot
Chris Lee as Chip Frinkel
Alyssa Simon as Lieutenant-Commander Frallen-Br'ar
Ivanna Cullinan as Commander Torianna
with
Linus Gelber: Groft, Dave, Tiny Tim 2, Nature Documentary Voice, Charles DickensBot, Martin LutherBot
David Arthur Bachrach: Plarnk, Special Announcer, Financial Reporter
Holly Pocket McCaffrey: Mubbet, Miss Sophie, Tiny Tim 1
Ian W. Hill: TV Announcer, Announcer, Familiar Space Smuggler, Recipe Voice 3
Jessica Stoya: Z'Wizzlinarp, Tiny Tim 3
Rolls Andre: George ForemanBot
Anna Stefanic: Recipe Voice 2, Stella
Philip Cruise: Cpl. Dormer
Lex Friedman: Bubbles
Berit is the supervising producer, showrunner, and script supervisor
Ian is the audio producer, sound designer, and technical supervisor
The writers’ room consists of Berit, Ian, John, Amanda, Chris, Philip, Lex, and Linus
Theme and Interstitial Music composed and performed by Anna Stefanic
Holiday Music Arrangements by Berit and Anna
Illustration by Dean Haspiel
Library Music and SFX licensed from Storyblocks
WEB: www.geminicollisionworks.com
TWITTER: @AlthaarTweeting and @LifeWithAlthaar
Optimized for best listening on earbuds or headphones.
Entire Production © 2019 Gemini CollisionWorks
Thank you for your attention; it is a pleasure working for you.
A Gemini CollisionWorks Production
EPISODE SCRIPT HERE!
In which all the main characters are trapped in the disreputable bar The Electric Egg after their Christmas party when the security doors seal as several station-threatening disasters suddenly rampage. Between all of their various skills, and while stuck where they are, they must come up with a solution that will repair the tiny loose wire behind it all, which is on the other side of the station, before the Fairgrounds explodes or the residents are all eaten by the predatory xenomorphs that have emerged from their usual home in the vents. Meanwhile, the bar regulars are getting stir-crazy, and the entertainment options are limited.
EPISODE THIRTEEN
"Mars Flies in a Klein Bottle"
written by Ian W. Hill
featuring
John Amir as John B
Berit Johnson as Althaar, Sopon, Kwontz, Alien Barfly
Eli Ganias as Hardyfox "H.F." Fornes
Ivanna Cullinan as Commander Mindy Torianna
Alyssa Simon as Lieutenant-Commander Frallen-Br'ar
Chris Lee as Chip Frinkel
Derrick Peterson as Xtopps
Zuri Washington as Delilah "Dee" Mallory
Amanda La Pergola as Mrs. Frondrinax
with
Lex Friedman: Crisis Announcement Voice, Bubbles
Ian W. Hill: Announcer
Philip Cruise: Cpl. Dormer
Linus Gelber: Martin LutherBot
Rolls Andre: Drunk Alien
Anna Stefanic: Stella
Berit is the supervising producer, showrunner, and script supervisor
Ian is the audio producer, sound designer, and technical supervisor
The writers’ room consists of Berit, Ian, John, Amanda, Chris, Philip, Lex, and Linus
Theme and Interstitial Music composed and performed by Anna Stefanic
Additional Song Composition, Arrangement, and Performance by Berit and Ian
Illustration by Dean Haspiel
Library Music and SFX licensed from Storyblocks
WEB: www.geminicollisionworks.com
TWITTER: @AlthaarTweeting and @LifeWithAlthaar
Optimized for best listening on earbuds or headphones.
Entire Production © 2019 Gemini CollisionWorks
Thank you for your attention; it is a pleasure working for you.
A Gemini CollisionWorks Production
EPISODE SCRIPT HERE!
Hi folks.
We just wanted to say hello before Season 2 of Life With Althaar begins next week.
And also to be sure you're aware of where to find us online. So here are all the links...
TWITTER:
Life With Althaar Account
Althaar's Personal Account!
FACEBOOK:
Gemini CollisionWorks Page
INSTAGRAM:
Ian/CollisionWorks Account
TUMBLR:
A Secret I'll Tell Nobody Never
PODBEAN PATRON ACCOUNT:
Donate to Life With Althaar here!
FULL SHOW CREDITS:
Our IMDb Page
STORE:
The Gemini CollisionWorks Store
TAX-DEDUCTIBLE DONATIONS TO GCW:
Our Fractured Atlas Page
OUR RARELY-UPDATED COMPANY HOMEPAGE:
Gemini CollisionWorks
We hope to see you around online, and that you enjoy where Season 2 of Life With Althaar takes you.
Thank you for your attention, it is a pleasure working for you,
Ian W. Hill & Berit Johnson
Gemini CollisionWorks
ALTHAAR'S VERY-SPECIAL FIRST-SEASON MUSICAL EP!
music, lyrics, and dialogue by Ian W. Hill and Berit Johnson
for Gemini CollisionWorks
except "Credit Music," composed by Anna Stefanic
and "Surfin' Bee," original music by Nikolai Rimsky-Korsakov
all arrangements by Berit Johnson
produced, mixed, and engineered by Ian W. Hill
1. Althaar Welcomes You!
2. "Life With Althaar opening credit music (instrumental)"
3. Althaar on Dee and Xtopps!
4. "Danube Planum"
5. Althaar on Xtopps's Audition!
6. "Surfin' Bee"
7. Althaar on Space Shanties!
8. "Around the Rings of Saturn (excerpt)"
9. Althaar Introduces a Duet!
10. "Baby, It's a Vacuum Out There"
11. Althaar Enjoys Interstellar Cultural Exchange!
12. "The 38 Days of Qo'rqish (excerpt)"
13. Althaar Doesn't Get a Joke, but Likes the Song Anyway!
14. "Beyond Uranus"
15. Althaar Thanks You and Says Goodbye for Now!
16. "Life With Althaar closing credits music (instrumental)"
performed by
Zuri Washington -- lead vocals (tracks 4, 10, 14)
Derrick Peterson -- lead vocal (track 10); backing vocal (track 4)
Anna Stefanic -- piano (tracks 1, 10, 16); additional synth (track 6)
Ian W. Hill -- electric guitar (tracks 4, 14)
Berit Johnson -- computer-programmed instruments (tracks 4, 6, 10, 14); Stylophone GEN X-1 (track 14); additional piano (track 14); Althaar
with
The Helium Freighter Crew Chorale (track 8):
Eli Ganias, Ian W. Hill, Chris Lee, Derrick Peterson & Alyssa Simon
and most of the Life With Althaar cast as the Qo'rqish Lament Singers (track 12)
special thanks to Thomas C. for parodic advice
Entire Production © 2020 Gemini CollisionWorks
In which we return to The Fairgrounds after six months to find the crew apparently happier and in considerably less danger, with no life-threatening incidents having happened for many weeks, which of course means that no one is comfortable, everyone is bored or suspicious, and, given the normally disaster-prone station, all the residents are just waiting for the other shoe to drop. And during one work cycle, a number of crew members, worried about this strange lack of turmoil, individually take extra precautions against anything going wrong, resulting, of course, in an unexpected domino effect to an unpleasant conclusion.
EPISODE FOURTEEN
"The Other Shoe"
written by Ian W. Hill & Berit Johnson
featuring
Berit Johnson as Althaar, Sopon, Alien Barfly, Cpl. Ness, Kwontz
John Amir as John B
Ivanna Cullinan as Commander Mindy Torianna
Alyssa Simon as Lieutenant-Commander Frallen-Br'ar
Eli Ganias as Hardyfox "H.F." Fornes
Amanda La Pergola as Mrs. Frondrinax
Chris Lee as Chip Frinkel
Zuri Washington as Delilah "Dee" Mallory
Derrick Peterson as Xtopps
with
Ian W. Hill: Announcer, William S. BurroughsBot, Large Mike
Anna Stefanic: Stella Reyes
Linus Gelber: StalinBot
Holly Pockey McCaffrey: Miss Sophie
Lex Friedman: Bubbles, Elevator
Clara Francesca: Offspring
Philip Cruise: Cpl. Dormer
David Arthur Bachrach: Reassuring Announcer
Fred Backus: Zanrak
Jessica Stoya: Seled
Berit is the supervising producer, showrunner, and script supervisor
Ian is the audio producer, sound designer, and technical supervisor
The writers’ room consists of Berit, Ian, John, Amanda, Chris, Philip, Lex, and Linus
Theme and Interstitial Music composed and performed by Anna Stefanic
Additional Song Composition, Arrangement, and Performance by Berit and Ian
Illustration by Dean Haspiel
Library Music and SFX licensed from Storyblocks
WEB: www.geminicollisionworks.com
TWITTER: @AlthaarTweeting and @LifeWithAlthaar
Optimized for best listening on earbuds or headphones.
Entire Production © 2020 Gemini CollisionWorks
Thank you for your attention; it is a pleasure working for you.
A Gemini CollisionWorks Production
EPISODE SCRIPT HERE!
In which The Syndicate comes to The Fairgrounds to make Chip Frinkel an offer he can't refuse concerning his bar, The Electric Egg: a seemingly innocent offer of a pool table. However, more turns out to be riding on the table, and a game of SuperNova on it, than first appears. Meanwhile, Althaar becomes addicted to binge-watching 21st-Century television shows.
EPISODE FIFTEEN
"A Simple Game of SuperNova"
written by Chris Lee
featuring
Berit Johnson as Althaar, Sopon, Cpl. Ness, Commerical Bro 2, Alien Barfly
Zuri Washington as Delilah "Dee" Mallory, Commercial Sexy Robot
Derrick Peterson as Xtopps, Commercial Bro
Chris Lee as Chip Frinkel
John Amir as John B
Ivanna Cullinan as Commander Mindy Torianna
Alyssa Simon as Lieutenant-Commander Frallen-Br'ar
Amanda La Pergola as Mrs. Frondrinax, Vert
Eli Ganias as Hardyfox "H.F." Fornes
with
Jessica Stoya: Frank
David Arthur Bachrach: Stuart, E-BOT
Lex Friedman: Bubbles
Ian W. Hill: Announcer, NERCA, William S. BurroughsBot, Bro Commercial, Dilurian 2, Kaiser WilhelmBot
Olivia Baseman: Amber on the Bridge
Linus Gelber: StalinBot, Sysco
Philip Cruise: Cpl. Dormer, John McEnroeBot
Holly Pocket McCaffrey: Miss Sophie, Dilurian 3
Anna Stefanic : Stella Reyes
Fred Backus: Dilurian 4, Donald Escroc
Berit is the supervising producer, showrunner, and script supervisor
Ian is the audio producer, sound designer, and technical supervisor
The writers’ room consists of Berit, Ian, John, Amanda, Chris, Philip, Lex, and Linus
Theme and Interstitial Music composed and performed by Anna Stefanic
Illustration by Dean Haspiel
Library Music and SFX licensed from Storyblocks
WEB: www.geminicollisionworks.com
TWITTER: @AlthaarTweeting and @LifeWithAlthaar
Optimized for best listening on earbuds or headphones.
Entire Production © 2020 Gemini CollisionWorks
Thank you for your attention; it is a pleasure working for you.
A Gemini CollisionWorks Production
EPISODE SCRIPT HERE!
NB: A handful of early downloaders may have gotten an inferior version with one unfinished scene still left in the mix by accident. It's been corrected now, but hey, collectors' item!
In which Drop Time comes again to The Fairgrounds, though several newcomers to the station have no idea what this period -- when the station drops a certain amount of days from the calendar to get in line with Earth's -- means for them. For John B, it means his birthday is getting skipped, for Dee, it means a cruel prank regarding a non-binding contract, for the energy being Lt. Frall, it means trying to drink coffee and pouring it on the floor, and for most of the crew, it means a time to slack off and ignore all rules. An angry John B searches for the hidden Timekeeping Central department, to discover the secret of The Algorithm that decides when Drop Time occurs, while H.F. takes Dee on a tour of several secret places on the station only available to the public during Drop Time.
EPISODE SIXTEEN
"Big Numbers and Little Science"
written by Linus Gelber
featuring
Berit Johnson as Althaar, Herbert, Sopon, Alien Barfly, Video Kid
John Amir as John B, Sanitation Grunt, Video Kid
Ivanna Cullinan as Commander Mindy Torianna
Alyssa Simon as Lieutenant-Commander Frallen-Br'ar, Indistinct Caller
Derrick Peterson as Xtopps, HECNET Responder, Alien Duck
Chris Lee as Chip Frinkel, Barry the Pilot
Zuri Washington as Delilah "Dee" Mallory, Video Kid
Eli Ganias as Hardyfox "H.F." Fornes, Video Kid
Amanda La Pergola as Mrs. Frondrinax
with
Linus Gelber: PythagorasBot, Sanitation Grunt
Philip Cruise: PhilolausBot, Sanitation Grunt
Ian W. Hill: Announcer, Winston ChurchillBot, Sanitation Grunt, Birthday Alert, Video Kid, William S. BurroughsBot, Trash Detector
Anna Stefanic : Stella Reyes
Olivia Baseman: Amber on the Bridge
Clara Francesca : Drop Time Educator
Berit is the supervising producer, showrunner, and script supervisor
Ian is the audio producer, sound designer, and technical supervisor
The writers’ room consists of Berit, Ian, John, Amanda, Chris, Philip, Lex, and Linus
Theme and Interstitial Music composed and performed by Anna Stefanic
Illustration by Dean Haspiel
Library Music and SFX licensed from Storyblocks
WEB: www.geminicollisionworks.com
TWITTER: @AlthaarTweeting and @LifeWithAlthaar
Optimized for best listening on earbuds or headphones.
Entire Production © 2020 Gemini CollisionWorks
Thank you for your attention; it is a pleasure working for you.
A Gemini CollisionWorks Production
EPISODE SCRIPT HERE!
In which the "Steves" from an annoying but highly motivated and skilled capitalist species, the Dilurians, come to The Fairgrounds, renting a downshifted and unused level, from which they proceed to wreak havoc across the entire space station. As their new business, Cadabra, expands rapidly from selling personalized smells, they begin, in less than a day, to gentrify across the station, wiping out all the beloved homegrown businesses and replacing them with more-convenient apps providing far worse service. On top of it, Commander Torianna discovers she will have to avert an actual massacre as the Dilurians attempt to expand into the sector of the Pudendar, a proud and exiled species of warrior artists uninterested in and offended by the commercial offerings.
EPISODE SEVENTEEN
"The Sweet Smell of the Fairgrounds"
written by Amanda La Pergola and Philip Cruise
featuring
Zuri Washington as Delilah "Dee" Mallory, Docking Clerk, X.Z. Drachir
Eli Ganias as Hardyfox "H.F." Fornes, Steve the First, Steve, Steve from BizLaunch, Party Steve
Chris Lee as Chip Frinkel, Steve the Second, Tour Guide Steve, Steve the Final
Alyssa Simon as Lieutenant-Commander Frallen-Br'ar, Steve-O
Ivanna Cullinan as Commander Mindy Torianna
John Amir as John B, Steve in Operations
Berit Johnson as Althaar, Stevers, Sopon, Cpl. Ness, Steve from Admin
Derrick Peterson as Xtopps, Steve-a-rino
Amanda La Pergola as Mrs. Frondrinax, Steve in Legal, Ayn RandBot
with
Holly Pocket McCaffrey: Package Non-Recipient, Pudendari Attendant
Philip Cruise: Christopher WalkenBot, Cpl. Dormer, Steve from Showcaine
Lex Friedman: Smarmy Computer, Steven, Dating Service Drone
Ian W. Hill: Announcer, Stevie, Jean-Claude, Kaiser WilhelmBot, Promo Drone, True Crime Comedian, Steve the Penultimate
Olivia Baseman: Amber on the Bridge
Rolls Andre: George ForemanBot, Restaurant Promo
Leila Okafor: Officer Crveno, Showcaine P.A.
Anna Stefanic : Stella Reyes, Pitch Video, Zyloxides fru Peplin
David Arthur Bachrach: Steve from Integration, Falling-in-Love Drone, Pharma Steve
Linus Gelber: Steve from HR, StalinBot, Awesome Steve
Fred Backus: Steve from Tech Support, Big Steve
Clara Francesca : Offspring, Queen Westellernta of the Pudendari
Berit is the supervising producer, showrunner, and script supervisor
Ian is the audio producer, sound designer, and technical supervisor
The writers’ room consists of Berit, Ian, John, Amanda, Chris, Philip, Lex, and Linus
Theme and Interstitial Music composed and performed by Anna Stefanic
Illustration by Dean Haspiel
Library Music and SFX licensed from Storyblocks
WEB: www.geminicollisionworks.com
TWITTER: @AlthaarTweeting and @LifeWithAlthaar
Optimized for best listening on earbuds or headphones.
Entire Production © 2020 Gemini CollisionWorks
Thank you for your attention; it is a pleasure working for you.
A Gemini CollisionWorks Production
EPISODE SCRIPT HERE!
In which John B, on yet another boring and routine EVA mission to fix a very small wire on the outside of The Fairgrounds, is sent hurling away from the space station by a chance explosion. As John and the bridge crew attempt in vain to find a way to bring him back (that won't kill him), all of his other friends on The Fairgrounds show up on the bridge to say hello (for no logical reason), and John suspects that, despite their assurances, it's really to say a very final goodbye. And for some reason or reasons, neither Frall nor Althaar seem to be around.
EPISODE EIGHTEEN
"Space Hat with Air"
written by Ian W. Hill
featuring
John Amir as John B
Ivanna Cullinan as Commander Mindy Torianna
Eli Ganias as Hardyfox "H.F." Fornes
Amanda La Pergola as Mrs. Frondrinax, Vert
Berit Johnson as Althaar, Cpl. Ness, Sopon, Alien Barfly, Kwontz
Chris Lee as Chip Frinkel
Zuri Washington as Delilah "Dee" Mallory
Derrick Peterson as Xtopps
Alyssa Simon as Lieutenant-Commander Frallen-Br'ar
with
Linus Gelber: StalinBot
Olivia Baseman: Amber on the Bridge
Ian W. Hill: Announcer
Holly Pocket McCaffrey: Miss Sophie
Rolls Andre: Werner HerzogBot
Philip Cruise: Cpl. Dormer
Lex Friedman: Bubbles
Anna Stefanic : Stella Reyes
Berit is the supervising producer, showrunner, and script supervisor
Ian is the audio producer, sound designer, and technical supervisor
The writers’ room consists of Berit, Ian, John, Amanda, Chris, Philip, Lex, and Linus
Theme and Interstitial Music composed and performed by Anna Stefanic
Illustration by Dean Haspiel
Library Music and SFX licensed from Storyblocks
WEB: www.geminicollisionworks.com
TWITTER: @AlthaarTweeting and @LifeWithAlthaar
Optimized for best listening on earbuds or headphones.
Entire Production © 2020 Gemini CollisionWorks
Thank you for your attention; it is a pleasure working for you.
A Gemini CollisionWorks Production
EPISODE SCRIPT HERE!
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looking forward to it love your work!
I’m not usually a fan of outer space comedy dramas but this was quit enjoyable ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Glad I gave this show a try! One of my new favs!