Long Distance, Bit Weird

On this week's Patreon exclusive bonus episode we're being sophisticated grown-ups and, inspired by the lady who diarrhoea'd herself and everyone else at Hyrox, talking about other athletes who have done the same. It's so nice! This is just a preview but for the full almost-hour-long YES THAT'S RIGHT WE TALK ABOUT THIS FOR AN HOUR episode head to our Patreon where you'll also find a bunch more exclusive episodes and other content.

Welcome to Long Distance, Bit Weird, a podcast from international comedy couple Sooz Kempner and Michael Balazo. One of them lives in the UK, the other in Canada. This week Sooz tells Michael the story of 90s phenomenon Lara Croft, the superstar lady protagonist of the incredibly popular Tomb Raider video game franchise. Was she aimed at girls? Did she go to school with Prince Charles? Why did her appearance change from game to game? And was there really a perverted cheat code that made her clothes disappear? Listen up to find out the answer to all of these questions and more! But first, Michael reads TWO missives in this week's edition of "Actual Customer Letters to Wetherspoon News." Be sure to subscribe to the Long Distance, Bit Weird Patreon for bonus audio and video episodes. Episode two of this deep-dive in to Nigel Farage is up now on the Patreon! *** ANNOUNCEMENTS ATTENTION: HUMOUR FANS. Michael Balazo's new, much-anticipated 3rd standup comedy album "Pizza Pals" is out NOW! Recorded in November of 2025, Pizza pals is full of funny jokes and silly ideas, and it's available on Bandcamp! SHOWS! October 10th - Sooz at Quantum Leopard @ Bold Elephant, London TICKETS October 18th - Sooz at Sunday Cabaret @ Royal Vauxhall Tavern, London TICKETS November 4th - Sooz Kempner: IMPOSTER @ Pleasance, London - TICKETS

Welcome to Long Distance, Bit Weird, a podcast from international comedy couple Sooz Kempner and Michael Balazo. One of them lives in the UK, the other in Canada. This week Sooz and Michael share their thoughts on the new, four-hour documentary about Elon Musk they saw at the Toronto International Film Festival. Is four hours too long to stare at Elon's beautiful face? Listen to find out! But first, there's a pizza-focused edition of the hit segment "Actual Customer Letters to Wetherspoon News." Be sure to subscribe to the Long Distance, Bit Weird Patreon for bonus audio and video episodes. Episode two of this deep-dive in to Nigel Farage is up now on the Patreon! *** ANNOUNCEMENTS ATTENTION: HUMOUR FANS. Michael Balazo's new, much-anticipated 3rd standup comedy album "Pizza Pals" is out NOW! Recorded in November of 2025, Pizza pals is full of funny jokes and silly ideas, and it's available on Bandcamp! SHOWS! October 3rd - Sooz Kempner: IMPOSTER @ Aberystwyth Comedy Festival TICKETS November 4th - Sooz Kempner: IMPOSTER @ Pleasance, London - TICKETS

Welcome to Long Distance, Bit Weird, a podcast from international comedy couple Sooz Kempner and Michael Balazo. One of them lives in the UK, the other in Canada. This week it's the second part of our deep dive into the world of Nigel Farage, Britain's favourite Guinness and champagne swiller. From the Brexit disaster to Reform's current £72 million pound problem, we talk about Nige's cool life since 2015. Be sure to subscribe to the Long Distance, Bit Weird Patreon for bonus audio and video episodes. Episode two of this deep-dive in to Nigel Farage is up now on the Patreon! *** ANNOUNCEMENTS ATTENTION: HUMOUR FANS. Michael Balazo's new, much-anticipated 3rd standup comedy album "Pizza Pals" is out NOW! Recorded in November of 2025, Pizza pals is full of funny jokes and silly ideas, and it's available on Bandcamp! SHOWS! October 3rd - Sooz Kempner: IMPOSTER @ Aberystwyth Comedy Festival TICKETS   November 4th - Sooz Kempner: IMPOSTER @ Pleasance, London - TICKETS

Welcome to Long Distance, Bit Weird, a podcast from international comedy couple Sooz Kempner and Michael Balazo. One of them lives in the UK, the other in Canada. This week it's time for us to go deep inside the world of Nigel Farage. From plane crashes to election losses to constantly getting covered in milkshake...this guy knows how to live a life! So much so that we've spread him out over two episodes. Mmmm spread em, Nige. Part one takes us from his birth to 2015. Episode two next week (or already available exclusively on our Patreon). ALSO: someone writes in with a business idea in the latest edition of the hit segment "Actual Customer Letters to Wetherspoon News." Be sure to subscribe to the Long Distance, Bit Weird Patreon for bonus audio and video episodes. Episode two of this deep-dive in to Nigel Farage is up now on the Patreon! *** ANNOUNCEMENTS ATTENTION: HUMOUR FANS. Michael Balazo's new, much-anticipated 3rd standup comedy album "Pizza Pals" is out NOW! Recorded in November of 2025, Pizza pals is full of funny jokes and silly ideas, and it's available on Bandcamp! SHOWS! September 13 - Sooz guesting on NonCensored - The Last Show @ Kings Place, London - TICKETS September 17th - Sooz and Michael are on together at Laugh Sabbath @ Comedy Bar (Bloor St), Toronto - TICKETS November 4th - Sooz's new show Imposter @ Pleasance, London - TICKETS