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Love Over Addiction
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Love Over Addiction

Author: Michelle Anderson

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Do you love someone suffering from addiction? You're not powerless over this disease. You don’t need to wait for them to get sober. Join us for encouragement, hope, and some fun (because recovery doesn’t need to be depressing). If you feel exhausted from trying to help, depressed when they've been drinking or using drugs, and worried this roller coaster ride will never end – we can help.
274 Episodes
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When you love someone struggling with addiction, you may feel depressed sometimes or have feelings of anxiety. You've been through a lot because of their addiction, right? Just know that you're not alone in feeling this way. Many people in our community can relate to what you're going through (including myself). And that's what I'm going to discuss today: my personal story of struggling with depression (along with some ways I've found helpful in dealing with depression and anxiety). Find more here:  https://loveoveraddiction.com/my-depression-story/ Join us here: https://loveoveraddiction.com
When you love someone struggling with addiction, you've maybe felt overwhelmed sometimes. Or you start believing some negative thoughts about yourself that their addiction tries to convince are true. Can you relate? So how can you start to change this? Tune in to this new episode where I share some tips to help you feel less overwhelmed and more empowered instead. Find more here:  https://loveoveraddiction.com/feeling-overwhelmed/  Join us here: https://loveoveraddiction.com
When you love someone struggling with addiction, the decision to stay or leave your relationship is ultimately up to you. It's one that you need to have full ownership of. But if you've decided to stay, what does that look like? And what are some things that you'll need to consider? Tune in to this new episode where I dive into this (as well as what a wedding dress moment has to do with staying with your loved one). Find more here:  https://loveoveraddiction.com/staying-with-your-loved-one/ Join us here: https://loveoveraddiction.com
Loving someone with addiction usually means you feel many things: love, anxiety, and frustration (just to name a few). Or even that you're coming unglued. Can you relate? Just know that what you are feeling and what you're going through is a big deal. It's okay for you to feel all of the feels. And that's what I share with you in this week's new episode (as well as an 'A-ha!' moment I had after a nightmare recently). Find more here:  https://loveoveraddiction.com/feeling-big-deal/ Join us here: https://loveoveraddiction.com
When you love someone struggling with addiction, there's usually a rollercoaster of emotions - feeling hopeful for their recovery, only to then feel disappointed when they can't get sober. Over and over again. Not only is this frustrating, but it's an unhealthy cycle for you, as well.  So if you've finally reached a point that enough is enough and you've decided to leave, then what? Tune in to this new episode to hear why it's time to take ownership of your life and what that may look like. Find more here:  https://loveoveraddiction.com/after-you-leave/ Join us here: https://loveoveraddiction.com
Have you gone back and forth (maybe many times) on whether you should stay or leave your relationship with your loved one who struggles with addiction? And let's be honest: that mental mind game can get pretty exhausting sometimes, right? Just know that it's okay if you don't know right now what you want to do. But it's also so important to remember that you DO have control over your decision. And that's what I'm going to dive into with today's new episode (along with a personal story about a big decision my daughter made recently). Find more here: https://loveoveraddiction.com/decision/ Join us here: https://loveoveraddiction.com
Have you ever thought that if you just keep a smile on your face and look pretty and perfectly together (even though you're barely hanging on), that it will be easier than expressing what you're REALLY going through while loving someone struggling with addiction? But how is that healthy? (Hint: it's not). Tune in to this new episode where I dive into why it's so important to embrace who you really are and shed the shell of who you think you 'should' be (to yourself and everyone else). Find more here:  https://loveoveraddiction.com/pretty/ Join us here: https://loveoveraddiction.com
You've more than likely tried expressing your feelings to them, right? Like how their drinking or using is affecting you and your relationship. Or that you're at your breaking point in dealing with their behavior. But has that actually helped to change anything? Tune in to this week's new episode, where we do some 'real talk,' and I give some loving truths about what YOU can do if your loved one is not getting sober. Find more here:  https://loveoveraddiction.com/sober-real-talk/ Join us here: https://loveoveraddiction.com
When you love someone struggling with addiction, have you ever thought about the possibility of leaving them? Because let's be honest, it can be exhausting wondering how much longer you can put up with the hurt and ups and downs. Right? And that's what I'm going to discuss with you today. Tune in to this week's new episode, where I share my personal story of how I finally realized that I needed to divorce my ex-husband (and how I knew that I would follow through with my decision). Find more here:  https://loveoveraddiction.com/divorce/ Join us here: https://loveoveraddiction.com
Have you ever felt crazy because of your loved one's addiction? Like, maybe their addiction is all in your mind and not real? Or that you're somehow at fault for their addiction? So how do you move past feeling this way? Tune in to this episode, where I share several new stories that I haven't told before about my personal experience of feeling crazy because of my ex-husband's addiction. Find more here:  https://loveoveraddiction.com/convince-crazy/ Join us here: https://loveoveraddiction.com
Have you ever worried that something bad might happen to your loved one that struggles with addiction? Maybe it's a fear of them getting in trouble legally or overdosing...or even dying. Just thinking about this might give you some anxiety, right? But how do you start to overcome this fear so that it's not consuming you? Tune in to this week's new episode to hear why letting go of certain things is so important (and how you CAN start to feel better). Find more here:  https://loveoveraddiction.com/fear-anxiety/ Join us here: https://loveoveraddiction.com
When you love someone struggling with addiction, you're more than likely taking on too much responsibility. I mean, let's be honest; you're probably the one who always makes sure that everything gets done, whether that's the household, children, finances, or many other things. It can be downright exhausting. So, how can you tell if you're taking on too much responsibility? Tune in to this new episode where you'll learn that you don't have to do it all (and why you probably feel like you currently need to). Find more here:  https://loveoveraddiction.com/too-much-responsibility/  Join us here: https://loveoveraddiction.com
When you love someone struggling with addiction, it can be frustrating because you see them self-destruct. And in turn, it can also sometimes affect you (and your children), right? I've been there before, too. So how can you start to feel better? Tune in to this week's new episode, where we'll brainstorm some consequences for your loved one's behavior. Doing this will help give YOU the power to choose your reactions. Find more here:  https://loveoveraddiction.com/consequences/ Join us here: https://loveoveraddiction.com
When you love someone struggling with addiction, have you ever felt like you're losing yourself? Or maybe feel like you're crazy because of things your partner says to you? Here's the thing: that's not healthy. So, how do you find your way back to your true (and healthy) self again? Tune in to this week's new episode to hear some tips on how to do that. Find more here:  https://loveoveraddiction.com/health-and-healing/ Join us here: https://loveoveraddiction.com
When you love someone struggling with addiction, you just want to try to make sense of why this is happening to them, right? And you probably also want some validation that they really do have a problem (because let's be honest, addiction can make you feel crazy sometimes). So is there a way to be able to do that (and does it really help)? Tune in to this week's new episode, where I cover several screening tools and how understanding this process will help your expectations if your partner undergoes one. Find more here:  https://loveoveraddiction.com/screening/ Join us here: https://loveoveraddiction.com
As you know, there are many things that a person can be addicted to, such as alcohol, drugs, or pornography. But there's one type of addiction that I haven't really discussed much, which is gambling. I have been learning more and more about it, so I want to share what I've learned so far, including what causes someone to become addicted to gambling. Tune in to this week's new episode, where I'll discuss this, as well as different types of gambling that your loved one may struggle with.   Find more here:  https://loveoveraddiction.com/gambling/ Join us here: https://loveoveraddiction.com
When you have children with your partner who struggles with addiction, it's important to know and understand that they have an increased risk of developing an addiction themselves. Regardless of how nurturing of an environment you provide to your children, there's still a possibility of this happening. So how do you break this cycle? Tune in to this new episode where I cover why it's so important to educate your children (regardless of their age) about addiction. Find more here:  https://loveoveraddiction.com/future-of-addiction/ Join us here: https://loveoveraddiction.com
When thinking about your loved one who struggles with addiction, have you ever wondered why it affects them? What is it that makes some more prone to addiction than others? As I've said before, most of my episodes are all about you and your healing. I usually don't concentrate on those struggling with addiction.  But I really think some of this research can empower you to make necessary decisions about your own future. Tune in to this new episode where I go over three reasons they may be more prone to addiction and why it's important to release any responsibility from yourself. Find more here:  https://loveoveraddiction.com/prone-to-addiction/ Join us here: https://loveoveraddiction.com
As you may have heard several episodes ago, I'm taking a certification course at Stanford that's all about the history and theories of addiction in a very scientific way. And I'm not going to lie; it's a lot.  But I want to share with you (in a more 'cliff notes' sort of way) some of what I'm learning because I think it will help you understand why people become addicted.  Tune in to this week's new episode, where I'll cover three theories of addiction and how you have what it takes to be happy and healthy as an individual (even if your partner is struggling with addiction). Find more here:  https://loveoveraddiction.com/addiction-theory/  Join us here: https://loveoveraddiction.com
This week, I'm switching gears a little bit to talk about a subject that may be a little sensitive to some of you (myself included): abuse. While the thought of possibly being in an abusive relationship may be a bit unsettling, knowing if certain behaviors are abusive is so important. Knowledge is power. Tune in to this week's new episode, where I cover six types of abuse, as well as my personal experience with it.  And even if you're not in an abusive relationship with your partner, having this information in your back pocket might help somebody else out in your life.  Find more here:  https://loveoveraddiction.com/abuse/ Join us here: https://loveoveraddiction.com
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Comments (24)

Barb Morgan Springstube

every relationship ends up same problem, seems i only attract same kind of guy. So i stopped dating.. now my son is my co-dependent. this mother is so so tired. no idea no contact with son. cause i can't stop enabling.

Mar 9th
Reply

Barb Morgan Springstube

i just want more info on why we are co-dependent.

Mar 9th
Reply (1)

Barb Morgan Springstube

what if it is your son. 44 years old.. not a child. years and years of tough love, then enable him.. ugh.

Mar 8th
Reply

Barb Morgan Springstube

did change ph #

Mar 8th
Reply

Barb Morgan Springstube

what if they say they will burn the house down if you call the sheriff? afraid to get a judge involved that way.

Mar 8th
Reply

Adriana Jenson

Binge listening. Exactly what I need. My husband becomes an asshole when he's coming down and sometimes when he's drunk and loaded. He gets blackout drunk and lies to my face about being shitty drunk. He's gotten blackout drunk and made a pass at my best friend and niece but hasn't tried to be intimate with me in years. He does things that kill my heart, soul and esteem. He lies and steals when it comes to buying booze, pills or other drugs, and then there's the debt he accumulates and hides from things like gambling. Unfortunately, he's a "whatchagotaholic," meaning he's addicted to numbing himself by any means necessary and by whatever is available. I've been going through this for 10 years and I'm at a breaking point. If I weren't so damned scared over losing everything we have, most of which I earned, I would've left a long time ago. Also, I was independent when we met and had an excellent career, but now I feel dependent and not working. I'm like an empty shell. He's repeated so many times, "You couldn't survive without me. I do too much for you." As I've grown more depressed, he's picked up more slack but makes sure to tell me constantly how useful he is, how much he does, and that I'd be lost without him. I have to remind myself I survived 25 years without him. I went from having lots of friends and active to isolated and depressed, and my husband paints himself as my savior. He's got an entitlement issue where he believes he has the right to do what he wants without telling me because he does a lot for our household. He goes through phases of making me his enemy, then uses that mindset to justify his actions, lying to me, etc. I started the separation process a few months back and meet with an attorney tomorrow to get through the financial assets step of the process.

Jun 29th
Reply

Leslee Dunn Burns

I really needed this today. Thank you Michelle.

May 15th
Reply

David Golson

33444 doesn't work

Sep 24th
Reply

Rachel Miller

thanks for this podcast

Aug 22nd
Reply (1)

Michelle Ann Green

First of all my name is also Michelle and my husband is a alcoholic...i am sooooo appreciated by finding your podcast...i soooo needed this support!

Jul 9th
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Trish Richardson

This is an amazing listen... Thank you thank you for sharing the good stories. My partner is an alcoholic & nicotine addict. He is not abusive but does not earn enough to pay for his habits & I have been enabling him by sharing my money with him. At 52 I am now facing a bleak financial future but love him so much... he is an amazing human being. I now clearly understand that I have become codependant & need to work on me... Thank you thank you. xx

Jun 21st
Reply

Nicole Brewer

Wow! I need this program so very much! Truly! I’m separated from my addicted husband now. I’m falling apart as we speak. I don’t want a divorce and there is no communication right now. My kids are all hurting. I love him. But don’t love the separation. He won’t come home and blames me for kicking him out. Now we may loose our home.

Mar 25th
Reply

Mary Elizabeth

It would be nice if we could include men in these podcasts, I work with several men who are struggling with their wives addictions.

Jan 5th
Reply

Mary Elizabeth

This podcast has changed my life for the better, it brings me peace to know I am not alone. Thank you.

Jan 5th
Reply

Anita Pascal

this podcast has caused me to be more aware of my own personal issues.

Oct 9th
Reply

Anita Pascal

very very helpful

Oct 9th
Reply

Amanda Baker

Love ur podcast Michelle, u have helped me more than u will ever know!

Oct 7th
Reply

Amanda Baker

The master class text is not working for me. Can anyone help?

Oct 7th
Reply (1)

Txharv08

Great information but I can’t stand how she invites you to her website and downloads at the beginning and end of every podcast. It’s literally 50% of each podcast

Aug 30th
Reply (1)

Jen Rhode Hebard

This podcast has been a game changer in how I manage myself. The one person I do have control over!

Jul 16th
Reply
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