Mastermind Parenting Podcast

In this episode, I talk about a pretty controversial topic - working vs. stay at home moms. I think you guys might be a bit pissed off with me about this one. It's okay. Really. I love you enough to level with you about these things. Even though these are hard conversations and involve the courage to get really honest with yourself and call yourself out on your own bullsh!t, it’s a way to go to the next level of mastering your own mind. Trust me, this is personal for me.   Topics Covered: Mom Judgment Insecurity “Common Enemy Intimacy” a theory by Brene Brown Which kids turn out better? Looking at judgment (Judgment Detox book by Gabby Bernstein) Making a choice to work or stay at home that is aligned with what you REALLY want Get my Free Guide! This guide contains the condensed nuggets of my mind mastering parenting recipe. I've been developing my signature Mastermind Parenting method for over twenty years and I'm BEEEyond thrilled to share it with you. It has the power not to just improve the conversations and relationships in your family but digging in and doing this work will change your life. I can't wait for you to get started so I can teach you everything! Head over here to get your copy https://mastermindparenting.com/freeguide Apply for Free Coaching! Thank you so much for listening and being an amazing mama that listens to parenting podcasts! I absolutely love connecting with other moms during the Real Coaching with Randi monthly segment and share their story. If you would like to get some free coaching on a future episode, head over to https://mastermindparenting.com/freecoaching/ and hit the Apply button. Get my book! Hear about my family history and the tools that have helped me replace old parenting patterns that simply don’t work with these puzzling kiddos. It's my way of paying it forward as a human that wants our kids to experience a kinder and more generous world. Head over here to get your copy https://mastermindparenting.com/book Thanks for listening! Thanks so much for listening to our podcast! If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it using the social media buttons on this page. Do you have some feedback or questions about this episode? Leave a note in the comment section below! Subscribe to the podcast If you would like to get automatic updates of new podcast episodes, you can subscribe to the podcast on iTunes or Stitcher. You can also subscribe from the podcast app on your mobile device. Leave us an iTunes review Ratings and reviews from our listeners are extremely valuable to us and greatly appreciated. They help our podcast rank higher on iTunes, which exposes our show to more awesome listeners like you. If you have a minute, please leave an honest review on iTunes.

In this episode, I want to discuss what it looks like to have the courage to put your kids first...above other people’s opinions of you as a mom and even allowing THEM to be wrong about you. I tell a story about a recent situation at the park involving a 3-year-old who wants a balloon from a bday party where he wasn’t invited.    Topics covered: Primal sense of belonging for all humans Mind mastery and self-awareness Wayne Gretsky: “You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.” Mom Judgment Dirty future pain Leaning into negative emotions takes 90 seconds to move thru us Teaching our kids to go for the shot and be willing to face negative emotions Deciding what type of mom you’ll be? Will you be one who puts the possible judgment of you as a mom 1st?  Or will you teach your kid to go for the shot and support them through potential negative emotion? Get my Free Guide! This guide contains the condensed nuggets of my mind mastering parenting recipe. I've been developing my signature Mastermind Parenting method for over twenty years and I'm BEEEyond thrilled to share it with you. It has the power not to just improve the conversations and relationships in your family but digging in and doing this work will change your life. I can't wait for you to get started so I can teach you everything! Head over here to get your copy https://mastermindparenting.com/freeguide Apply for Free Coaching! Thank you so much for listening and being an amazing mama that listens to parenting podcasts! I absolutely love connecting with other moms during the Real Coaching with Randi monthly segment and share their story. If you would like to get some free coaching on a future episode, head over to https://mastermindparenting.com/freecoaching/ and hit the Apply button. Get my book! Hear about my family history and the tools that have helped me replace old parenting patterns that simply don’t work with these puzzling kiddos. It's my way of paying it forward as a human that wants our kids to experience a kinder and more generous world. Head over here to get your copy https://mastermindparenting.com/book Thanks for listening! Thanks so much for listening to our podcast! If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it using the social media buttons on this page. Do you have some feedback or questions about this episode? Leave a note in the comment section below! Subscribe to the podcast If you would like to get automatic updates of new podcast episodes, you can subscribe to the podcast on iTunes or Stitcher. You can also subscribe from the podcast app on your mobile device. Leave us an iTunes review Ratings and reviews from our listeners are extremely valuable to us and greatly appreciated. They help our podcast rank higher on iTunes, which exposes our show to more awesome listeners like you. If you have a minute, please leave an honest review on iTunes.

I just celebrated my daughter's 21st birthday. We're out in San Diego because she is doing some internships here and we decided to relocate to California for a while. So, I've been working from here. And I have been with my daughter a lot lately. She goes to school in Santa Barbara and we went back to Santa Barbara last weekend to celebrate her birthday and have a whole special weekend. We had a lot of time on the road together, and over the weekend we were processing what is happening in our country right now. It was interesting to be around her, and she's also moving into a house in Santa Barbara with several other young, smart women. There were a bunch of different birthday things that they did for her this weekend, and we all celebrated together. So, they're all just beside themselves, understandably with this overturn of Roe v. Wade. I think just so many of us are just in shock and disbelief and grief. And in the coaching world, we’re in what we call the goo, which is anytime we're going through an identity shift, meaning we're not who we were before. I learned to look at this identity shift In terms of comparing the human to the butterfly. When the caterpillar becomes a butterfly, the caterpillar goes into the chrysalis and then eventually it comes out a totally different animal. And when it goes into the chrysalis, it dissolves, and it becomes like caterpillar soup. And then all the cells within that organism restructure and turn into an entirely new organism. And so the caterpillar becomes a butterfly. And anytime we go through an identity shift, which is, who I was before is not who I am or who I'm becoming, we all kind of become person soup. We become person “goo” for a while, and this happens all throughout our lives. So, with this episode I’m unpacking my thoughts and feelings around this transition, and those of others I’ve been talking to, like my daughter, her friends, parents, and others. This is impacting multiple generations. I understand that many of us are grieving, and sometimes anger is a part of the grieving process. But so often I think people just get stuck there. Let's use the anger to mobilize ourselves. Let's use the anger to strategize. Let's use the anger to step out of the privilege that me and many other people have known, which is our bodies, our business. As always, thanks for listening, and be sure and head over to Facebook and you can join my free group Mastermind Parenting Community, where we post tips and tools and do pop up Live conversations where I do extra teaching and coaching to support you in helping your strong-willed children so that they can FEEL better and DO better. If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it! About Randi Rubenstein Randi Rubenstein helps parents with a strong-willed kiddo become a happier family and enjoy the simple things again like bike rides and beach vacays. She’s the founder of Mastermind Parenting, host of the Mastermind Parenting podcast, and author of The Parent Gap. Randi works with parents across the U.S. At Mastermind Parenting, we believe every human deserves to have a family that gets along. Randi’s Web and Social Links Website: https://mastermindparenting.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mastermindparenting Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mastermind_parenting/ Resources and Links Book your live assessment:

Parents, learn how to set limits without spanking, time outs, or sticker charts with this 5-part video training series and 3 days of live coaching. Welcome to Part 1 of this powerful series! To sign up for series announcements and coaching updates, and to learn more about this special bonus series, go to:https://mastermindparenting.com/settinglimits You may be asking yourself, “What should I do when the kids are acting out, fighting, or won’t take “No” for an answer?” You’ve tried time-outs, punishment, and positive or gentle parenting, but it seems like nothing is working. There is constant fighting, anger, and stress in your home You and your co-parent are not on the same page Your child expresses intense anger and defiance Learn how to take back control in a way that empowers you and your kids. We know you want to be a strong, loving leader who is respected at home. If you’re struggling to show up for yourself and your family in this way then you will benefit from this 5-part video training and 3-day live coaching experience. In the video training, we’ll cover common discipline strategies parents use, why they aren’t effective, and what to do instead. Randi is excited to be your personal parenting coach for a week! We hope you gain some new tips/tools/ways of looking at balance and baby steps for creating more boundaries. To continue moving the needle forward in creating a happier household go to MastermindParenting.com and check out Randi’s 3 beginning programs and find the one that’s a good fit for you. As always, thanks for listening, and be sure and head over to Facebook and you can join my free group Mastermind Parenting Community, where we post tips and tools and do pop up Live conversations where I do extra teaching and coaching to support you in helping your strong-willed children so that they can FEEL better and DO better. If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it! About Randi Rubenstein Randi Rubenstein helps parents with a strong-willed kiddo become a happier family and enjoy the simple things again like bike rides and beach vacays. She’s the founder of Mastermind Parenting, host of the Mastermind Parenting podcast, and author of The Parent Gap. Randi works with parents across the U.S. At Mastermind Parenting, we believe every human deserves to have a family that gets along. Randi’s Web/Social Links Website: https://mastermindparenting.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mastermindparenting Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mastermind_parenting/ Resources Discussed/Links Learn how to set limits without spanking, time outs, or sticker charts. A free 5-part video training series & 3 days of live coaching, sign up today.: https://mastermindparenting.com/settinglimits Book your live assessment: https://mastermindparenting.com/live-assessment/ Join our Free Facebook Group:

The last couple of episodes, I've been hitting on some heavy topics. I’ve also been sharing a little bit about my process and that I'm testing some hypotheses right now in preparation for a book I'm writing with my friend Sarah Miller. And I've been picking a lot of moms' brains about just what we're most worried about. One of the biggies that comes up… What do you do if your kid has a diagnosis or a label? Is my child going to be like this forever? Is this just a phase? Is it “normal” for kids to behave this way? I know through my conversations, that this has been part of your world or possibly come across your mind. I know it was part of my parenting experience, and today I’m going to share that story with you. I was noticing something that gave me these thoughts and prompted me to find out more about what was going on. It also led me to a huge insight related to my work, an “a-ha” moment of sorts. Another thing I’ve come to realize through working with Sarah, an insight she’s had through the conversations she’s had with her colleagues. The minute professionals bring up parenting as a possible influence on the behavior, people shut down and 99% of the time you never hear from those people again.  Also, parents often get diagnoses for their kids and it’s common that no one addresses the “now what?” What do I do with this information and what do I do next?  That was my experience too, my revelation of sorts. My son needed professional help, and instead of sitting in the waiting room, I went into the sessions with him. So I could observe, understand how to approach this, and know what to do after we were done with the sessions. To carry it forward to our home, and beyond.  Don’t let a diagnosis get you down. It’s important to get over our own egos and not to worry about other people’s judgment for not knowing all the things. We have to be willing to learn new things. It is the most generous, loving and unselfish thing you can do for your kids. This is the sign of a truly good parent, a parent that puts the needs of their kids before their own insecurities.  It is so hard. So incredibly hard. And I haven’t always done it.  As always, thanks for listening, and be sure and head over to Facebook and you can join my free group Mastermind Parenting Community, where we post tips and tools and do pop up Live conversations where I do extra teaching and coaching to support you in helping your strong-willed children so that they can FEEL better and DO better. If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it! About Randi Rubenstein Randi Rubenstein helps parents with a strong-willed kiddo become a happier family and enjoy the simple things again like bike rides and beach vacays. She’s the founder of Mastermind Parenting, host of the Mastermind Parenting podcast, and author of The Parent Gap. Randi works with parents across the U.S. At Mastermind Parenting, we believe every human deserves to have a family that gets along. Randi’s Web/Social Links Website: https://mastermindparenting.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mastermindparenting Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mastermind_parenting/ Resources Discussed/Links Learn how to set limits without spanking, time outs, or sticker charts. A free 5-part video training series & 3 days of live coaching, sign up today.: https://mastermindparenting.com/settinglimits

I am continuing the conversation from last week, so if you haven't listened to Episode 186, go and check it out. As I mentioned last week, I'm currently doing some research and planning, because I'm writing a book with a pediatrician and fellow Mastermind Mom, Sarah Miller.  We're testing out some different hypotheses. It's going to be a book that is written and sort of conversational between the two of us, looking at the doctor's perspective when we as parents are seeking their advice and their direction when we're worried about our kids. I think parents are asking their doctors things that they don't feel comfortable asking some of the people that are in their life who may have parenting experience. Their family or their close friends, for example. Parenting, I just think it's so obviously personal for so many of us, and is our most important role.  It's hard to feel scrutinized about the thing that you care about the absolute most. So my hypothesis has been that it's so hard to talk about these worries we have, and open up when we're worried about our kids because we just don't want to screw them up. And we're also so worried about other people judging us and we don't want other people to judge our kids. It seems many of us then talk to our doctors about these concerns, that they are a trusted resource who won’t judge us or our children. So, today’s episode is a continuation of these thoughts, along with some stories and examples which I believe many of you may be able to find a connection with, a sense that you’ve felt a similar way. I want this to become more of a mainstream conversation. And if you're feeling like the moms I described in today's episode, I want you to know there is nothing wrong with you, and you're not alone in how you're feeling. And even just identifying that you're feeling that way, makes you a more self-aware person. And since all change starts with awareness, you're exactly where you're supposed to be.  As always, thanks for listening, and be sure and head over to Facebook and you can join my free group Mastermind Parenting Community, where we post tips and tools and do pop up Live conversations where I do extra teaching and coaching to support you in helping your strong-willed children so that they can FEEL better and DO better. If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it! About Randi Rubenstein Randi Rubenstein helps parents with a strong-willed kiddo become a happier family and enjoy the simple things again like bike rides and beach vacays. She’s the founder of Mastermind Parenting, host of the Mastermind Parenting podcast, and author of The Parent Gap. Randi works with parents across the U.S. At Mastermind Parenting, we believe every human deserves to have a family that gets along. Randi’s Web/Social Links Website: https://mastermindparenting.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mastermindparenting Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mastermind_parenting/   Resources Discussed/Links   Learn how to set limits without spanking, time outs, or sticker charts. A 5-part video training series & 3 days of live coaching, sign up today.: https://mastermindparenting.com/settinglimits Book your live assessment: https://mastermindparenting.com/live-assessment/ Join...

I'm doing a bunch of research right now because I have just started writing my second book! And this one's going to be a collaboration with my friend and fellow Mastermind Mom, Sarah Miller. She is a doctor who is a pediatrician about half the time, and half the time internal medicine. We're having a lot of fun, and we're just in the outlining, planning it out phase right now. And we're testing a hypothesis. So, the hypothesis is basically that when you have a child who, from a very young age, is a challenging kid. One where your gut instincts tell you, “Hmm. I think there's something to figure out with this kiddo.” You know, let's say you're going to that baby class that all your friends signed up for and you've got the one child, I'm sure it's probably half the class, but in your mind, it's the one child who just is crying the whole time. And all the other babies are like clapping and doing all the baby things. And you've got the kid and you're sitting there working your ass off to try and have your little tiny baby enjoy this music class. And by the time that baby's two, you're starting to go to the birthday parties and all the other kids seem to be participating, but you've got the child who's like clinging to your leg and they don't want to play. All the other parents are talking and sharing a beverage and you're having to deal with your kid who is refusing to leave your side. And then it's time to start preschool and the teachers are telling you, “Oh, it's just separation anxiety.” So, there's just like there's scenario after scenario, after scenario where you're thinking there's something going on with your kid, but you don't even know where to start. And our hypothesis is that most people reach out or start asking questions during their doctor's visits with the pediatrician. Your pediatrician is a child development authority in your life. And someone you have that relationship where you feel like you can ask your “mom questions” and there's not going to be any judgment. Do you think? And so listen to this episode and if you want, let me know if this is you. If you reach out to your doctor, your pediatrician, to find out about all the typical milestones and they're the ones that you go to every time your kid has a birthday or when in their first year of life, every month. Because they're looking at all the markers, and they're the ones who are kind of following your kid’s developmental progress. As always, thanks for listening, and be sure and head over to Facebook and you can join my free group Mastermind Parenting Community, where we post tips and tools and do pop up Live conversations where I do extra teaching and coaching to support you in helping your strong-willed children so that they can FEEL better and DO better. If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it! About Randi Rubenstein Randi Rubenstein helps parents with a strong-willed kiddo become a happier family and enjoy the simple things again like bike rides and beach vacays. She’s the founder of Mastermind Parenting, host of the Mastermind Parenting podcast, and author of The Parent Gap. Randi works with parents across the U.S. At Mastermind Parenting, we believe every human deserves to have a family that gets along. Randi’s Web/Social Links Website: https://mastermindparenting.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mastermindparenting Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mastermind_parenting/ Resources Discussed/Links Weekly Parenting...

Do you want your kids to be successful in school? I know most of us want our kids to grow up to be the kind of people that have the skills to manage their time and frankly, their lives AND unfortunately, because many of us struggle with these skills ourselves, we can feel overwhelmed by this topic. I sat down with a true expert academic coach with a background in organizational psychology. Evan Weinberger is the owner of Staying Ahead of the Game, an worldwide academic coaching and tutoring company he founded in 2006. You don’t want to miss learning from Evan; he is such a sharp and insightful leader in the space of helping kids develop critical executive skills to help them kick ass in school and life. Enjoy! As always, thanks for listening, and be sure and head over to Facebook and you can join my free group Mastermind Parenting Community, where we post tips and tools and do pop up Live conversations where I do extra teaching and coaching to support you in helping your strong-willed children so that they can FEEL better and DO better. If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it! About Randi Rubenstein Randi Rubenstein helps parents with a strong-willed kiddo become a happier family and enjoy the simple things again like bike rides and beach vacays. She’s the founder of Mastermind Parenting, host of the Mastermind Parenting podcast, and author of The Parent Gap. Randi works with parents across the U.S. At Mastermind Parenting, we believe every human deserves to have a family that gets along. Randi’s Web/Social Links Website: https://mastermindparenting.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mastermindparenting Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mastermind_parenting/ About Evan Weinberger Hi! I am Evan! When I started Staying Ahead of the Game in 2006 after nearly two decades of struggling with my own learning differences in school, my main goal was to help students perform to their potential by equipping them with the systems, habits, tools, and skills they need to manage stress and achieve greater success. From the Houston location, I co-founded Illuminos in 2016 to bring these important services to the Greater Washington D.C. Metro Area. I look forward to bringing these much-needed services to more locations soon.  As my impact grows through the success of my companies, I am reminded of why I got into this business in the first place: to give students the wisdom that I wish I had at a younger age. I wanted to help students instead of CEO’s because I saw a problem that desperately needed a solution: students graduating without the soft skills needed to make a difference in the real world.  In addition to working with students, I very much enjoy my work educating educators. I now serve on multiple boards and committees centered around creating the best possible educational experience for every student, regardless of learning differences or socio-economic status. Evan’s Web/Social Links Website: https://mastermindparenting.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/StayingAheadoftheGame Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/saotg/ LinkedIn:

This week is a big episode for me, and you don’t want to miss every morsel of this conversation with the author, Michaeleen Doucleff. She wrote Hunt, Gather, Parent: What Ancient Cultures Can Teach Us About the Lost Art of Raising Happy, Helpful Little Humans. I make her fascinating book required reading for every parent I work with in my private programs.  This book is not like other parenting books - it reads like a fascinating anthropological study of human behavior. The oldest cultures in the world have mastered the art of raising happy, well-adjusted children. What can we learn from them? In this episode, we break down what we are getting wrong when it comes to parenting in our mainstream culture and bringing back the ancient wisdom of our foremothers in a very practical and relatable way…the good news is that this means more time for yourself and adult activities. Get ready to learn from Michaeleen - she is absolutely delightful! I definitely have a mom crush on her, and you will too.  As always, thanks for listening, and be sure and head over to Facebook and you can join my free group Mastermind Parenting Community, where we post tips and tools and do pop up Live conversations where I do extra teaching and coaching to support you in helping your strong-willed children so that they can FEEL better and DO better. Thanks so much for listening to our podcast! If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it! About Randi Rubenstein Randi Rubenstein helps parents with a strong-willed kiddo become a happier family and enjoy the simple things again like bike rides and beach vacays. She’s the founder of Mastermind Parenting, host of the Mastermind Parenting podcast, and author of The Parent Gap. Randi works with parents across the U.S. At Mastermind Parenting, we believe every human deserves to have a family that gets along. About Michaleen Doucleff Michaeleen Doucleff, PhD, is a global health correspondent for NPR’s Science Desk and the author of the New York Times bestseller Hunt, Gather, Parent. The book describes a way of raising kind and confident children, which moms and dads all over the world have turned to for millennia. Doucleff has a doctorate in chemistry from the University of Berkeley, California, and a bachelor’s degree in biology from Caltech. For the past decade, Doucleff has reported on disease outbreaks and children’s health for NPR. Before that, Doucleff was an editor at the journal Cell, where she wrote about the science behind pop culture. She lives in San Francisco with her husband, daughter and German Shepherd, Savanna. Web/Social Links Website: https://mastermindparenting.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mastermindparenting Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mastermind_parenting/ Resources Discussed/Links Hunt, Gather, Parent: What Ancient Cultures Can Teach Us About the Lost Art of Raising Happy, Helpful Little Humans by Michaleen Doucleff: https://amzn.to/39yjEkf Book your live assessment: https://mastermindparenting.com/live-assessment/ Join our Free Facebook Group: www.facebook.com/groups/mastermindparenting

In this episode, I sat down with Josh, a dad that sort of reluctantly became a Mastermind parent. I hear from moms ALL THE TIME that their husband is not willing to learn new parenting tools and may even think it’s unnecessary and foolish.  Well, this might be an episode you INSIST your husband listens to because Josh was also “Mastermind Parenting resistant” not so long ago. He questioned my credibility and “real” qualifications to do what I do, but his badass wife, Ali, wouldn’t take no for an answer…she fought for her family to find more peace and both she and Josh are so glad she did! Listen to this episode for more of my thoughts and strategies on how you can move toward being a Mastermind Parent! And as always, thanks for listening, and be sure and head over to Facebook and you can join my free group Mastermind Parenting Community where we post tips and tools and do pop up Live conversations where I do extra teaching and coaching to support you in helping your strong-willed children so that they can FEEL better and DO better. Thanks so much for listening to our podcast! If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it! About Randi Rubenstein Randi Rubenstein helps parents with a strong-willed kiddo become a happier family and enjoy the simple things again like bike rides and beach vacays. She’s the founder of Mastermind Parenting, host of the Mastermind Parenting podcast, and author of The Parent Gap. Randi works with parents across the U.S. At Mastermind Parenting, we believe every human deserves to have a family that gets along. Web/Social Links Website: https://mastermindparenting.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mastermindparenting Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mastermind_parenting/ Resources Discussed/Links Book your live assessment: https://mastermindparenting.com/live-assessment/ Join our Free Facebook Group: www.facebook.com/groups/mastermindparenting

So, what constitutes a difficult child? I think we need to start with that and that's even a hard thing to say, because nobody wants to call their kid difficult. Right? I get it. We have a kid that's struggling. Our household feels anything but peaceful. We have a dream that we want our kids to be at peace. We want a calm environment. We want that household that maybe we didn’t have but desired when we were growing up. We have all these hopes and dreams. And now you have a child who is “difficult” and you need to figure some things out. So, during today’s episode, I break down what I believe constitutes a difficult child. And then I give you some helpful tips, some strategies to help you find a way to find more peace in your household and manage some challenging behaviors your kiddo may be exhibiting. Like I often do, I unpack a real-life situation, one that may be familiar to you and your family. I stumbled upon this Mastermind Parenting method because I was also experiencing the challenges of a difficult child. It was because I couldn't find the exact right resource. I couldn't find the exact right program. I liked this part from one program, but I liked another part from another program, but I actually sort of liked this part from some “old school” methods that didn't seem aligned with the newer styles. And I realized, I was not someone who likes to follow exact recipes, so I threw together what worked for me and my family, and that’s what I’m sharing with you now. So, if you’re struggling with that difficult child, listen to this episode, and I’ll give you my top three tips for finding a way to a better place. Listen to this episode for more of my thoughts and strategies on how you can move toward being a Mastermind Parent! And as always, thanks for listening, and be sure and head over to Facebook and you can join my free group Mastermind Parenting Community where we post tips and tools and do pop up Live conversations where I do extra teaching and coaching to support you in helping your strong-willed children so that they can FEEL better and DO better. Thanks so much for listening to our podcast! If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it! About Randi Rubenstein Randi Rubenstein helps parents with a strong-willed kiddo become a happier family and enjoy the simple things again like bike rides and beach vacays. She’s the founder of Mastermind Parenting, host of the Mastermind Parenting podcast, and author of The Parent Gap. Randi works with parents across the U.S. At Mastermind Parenting, we believe every human deserves to have a family that gets along. Web/Social Links Website: https://mastermindparenting.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mastermindparenting Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mastermind_parenting/ Resources Discussed/Links Free 5-Part Video Series for Parents: Setting Limits without Spanking, Time Outs, or Sticker Charts: https://mastermindparenting.com/spanking-series/ Join our Free Facebook Group: www.facebook.com/groups/mastermindparenting

What do you do when you and your partner disagree on parenting styles and strategies? Unfortunately, this is the case with most of my moms. In this episode I unpack a story that is all too common. It’s a story of a volatile household, “To-Do List Sex,” and constant stress. The mom in this story has stuck with the Mastermind Parenting program and learned new methods of parenting. She stayed in her own lane, kept slogging along, and made mistakes along the way. But she’s done her own work, created change in her mind and her life, and took a stand. She refused to sweep the issues under the rug anymore and stuck to her guns. It wasn’t easy. Her husband is a good guy, deep down. So often, so much of the struggle is a giant miscommunication. Over time, little by little, things have gotten better. She has found ways to change patterns and hold her partner accountable. She’s been able to step into her strength and improve all the relationships in her life. Listen to this episode for more of my thoughts and strategies on how you can move toward being a Mastermind Parent! And as always, thanks for listening, and be sure and head over to Facebook and you can join my free group Mastermind Parenting Community where we post tips and tools and do pop up Live conversations where I do extra teaching and coaching to support you in helping your strong-willed children so that they can FEEL better and DO better. Thanks so much for listening to our podcast! If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it! About Randi Rubenstein Randi Rubenstein helps parents with a strong-willed kiddo become a happier family and enjoy the simple things again like bike rides and beach vacays. She’s the founder of Mastermind Parenting, host of the Mastermind Parenting podcast, and author of The Parent Gap. Randi works with parents across the U.S. At Mastermind Parenting, we believe every human deserves to have a family that gets along. Web/Social Links Website: https://mastermindparenting.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mastermindparenting Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mastermind_parenting/ Resources Discussed/Links Communication can be tough! Get the cheat sheet and audio training for my 3-Step recipe for having a productive conversation: https://mastermindparenting.com/productive-conversation/ Live assessment: https://mastermindparenting.com/live-assessment/ Join our Free Facebook Group: www.facebook.com/groups/mastermindparenting

My guest this week and I chat about how parents can be empowered as experts on their own children. My guest today is Allana Robinson. She and I connect on so many levels and have a great conversation about some new science around parenting and what we’re learning. Allana is a parenting coach, as well as a registered early childhood educator and developmental specialist. We know now that it’s not just triggers and consequences that shape behavior. In fact, the “old school” ABA (Appiled Behavioral Analysis) model completely ignores the functions of the nervous system. It completely ignores how social triggers and how social interaction influences behavior. It completely ignores trauma. It also completely ignores social and emotional learning. Allana and I unpack her experiences and her training, and how newer models like I talk about here on Mastermind Parenting allow kids to process emotional expression. Children live in their emotional brain. And so of course they're going to often be easily overstimulated and lots of things are going to set them off. And they're trying to make sense of the world through these dysregulated moments. Our job is to help them as grounded grownups, help reel them back in and help them learn the skills to reregulate. They're going to make mistakes. We can't be on top of it all the time, but when they make mistakes, it’s important that we show up and help them to learn those new skills. Children learn to regulate by being regulated. Children learn to be empathetic by being empathized with. We have to model what we want them to do in order for them to learn how to do it because they learn by observation. Listen to this episode for more of my thoughts and strategies on how you can move toward being a Mastermind Parent! And as always, thanks for listening, and be sure and head over to Facebook and you can join my free group Mastermind Parenting Community where we post tips and tools and do pop up Live conversations where I do extra teaching and coaching to support you in helping your strong-willed children so that they can FEEL better and DO better. Thanks so much for listening to our podcast! If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it! About Randi Rubenstein Randi Rubenstein helps parents with a strong-willed kiddo become a happier family and enjoy the simple things again like bike rides and beach vacays. She’s the founder of Mastermind Parenting, host of the Mastermind Parenting podcast, and author of The Parent Gap. Randi works with parents across the U.S. At Mastermind Parenting, we believe every human deserves to have a family that gets along. Web/Social Links Website: https://mastermindparenting.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mastermindparenting Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mastermind_parenting/ About Allana Robinson Allana Robinson is a parenting coach and she's the CEO of Uncommon Sense Parenting as well as a registered early childhood educator, developmental specialist, mom of two and military wife. Allana supports parents of toddlers, preschoolers, and kindergartners in understanding why their children are misbehaving and how to fix it without yelling, shaming or timeout. Allana’s mission is to empower parents as the experts on their own children and create an inclusive world full of calm, competent, confident kids. Website: https://www.allanarobinson.com/ Resources Discussed/Links

Chances are, if you're listening to this podcast, you have a hunch that you've got a strong-willed child. In today’s episode I wanted to talk about what really constitutes a child being strong-willed. Firstly, isn't every child strong-willed at some point or another? That's what I always say to the people who come to me, that everybody's got a “strong-willed” child.  The truth of the matter is that Mastermind Parenting is really for all humans. It's just that our strong-willed ones are the ones that bring us here because they're not complying with the old school parenting methods that most of us were raised with. And so, we seek resources, and we listen to podcasts, and we read books, and we're looking for the tools and the tips. But how do you know if your kid is a strong-willed kid or just a regular human kid that shows up with some strong-willed behavior because we all sometimes have strong-willed behavior? Strong-willed kids are very determined to do something even if other people say it should not be done. They are the challenging and difficult ones, the “squeaky wheel” of the family. They hijack the household, and it’s the child you walk on eggshells around. This is the child that when they are happy, you feel like you can finally breathe…ahhhhh. I’ll be totally honest, your strong-willed child is the one you love, but you don’t necessarily like. Listen to this episode, and I’ll share with you a very personal story of how my own strong-willed child impacted our family. I’ll also go through some questions and a scenario from someone else, and maybe you’ll be able to relate to one or both of these stories. And with each, as always, I’ll share tools and tips on how you can recognize the behaviors of strong-willed children, and some Mastermind Parenting strategies that will help you, and your family, breathe easier more often. Listen to this episode for more of my thoughts and strategies on how you can move toward being a Mastermind Parent! And as always, thanks for listening, and be sure and head over to Facebook and you can join my free group Mastermind Parenting Community where we post tips and tools and do pop up Live conversations where I do extra teaching and coaching to support you in helping your strong-willed children so that they can FEEL better and DO better. Thanks so much for listening to our podcast! If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it! About Randi Rubenstein Randi Rubenstein helps parents with a strong-willed kiddo become a happier family and enjoy the simple things again like bike rides and beach vacays. She’s the founder of Mastermind Parenting, host of the Mastermind Parenting podcast, and author of The Parent Gap. Randi works with parents across the U.S. At Mastermind Parenting, we believe every human deserves to have a family that gets along. Web/Social Links Website: https://mastermindparenting.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mastermindparenting Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mastermind_parenting/ Resources Discussed/Links Mini-Masters Self Study Program for Parents of Strong-Willed Children. Because parenting is hard, but it shouldn’t be this hard.: https://mastermindparenting.com/minimasters/ Live assessment: https://mastermindparenting.com/live-assessment/

Many of you are searching for tips on how “not to” parent. This doesn't surprise me because I've talked about this on the podcast before. Asking for the “not to’s” instead of the “how to’s” is part of our human condition. It's much easier and more natural to focus on what not to do rather than what to do.  I've heard this referred to as the human negativity bias and it's something that we've carried over, it's part of our primal wiring. We're always scanning our environment for things that might feel unsafe or dangerous. So, we're always kind of looking for the negative, looking how we can keep ourselves safe and healthy, what we need to avoid and “Not do.”  That's why when our kids are running by a pool and we might say, “Don't run, don't run.” Instead of saying, “Walking feet, walking feet.” It's so much easier and instinctive to say what not to do rather than what to do. Searching for, “What am I not supposed to be doing?” is somewhat of a natural question. Because even though you don't know exactly what to do, you want to make sure that you’re not doing the “terrible” things, something wrong. The way to counteract that human negativity bias is through awareness and a lot of the learnings and positive psychology, which I incorporate into Mastermind Parenting. I'm a bit obsessed with neuroscience and I have been for a very long time. I think it's just so amazing that we can actually create new habits that retrain the way that we communicate, retrain the way that we think, and retrain ourselves. It’s that old adage, “You can't teach an old dog new tricks.” But you can. You just have to practice a whole lot. And when you start to practice little things like focusing on what the behaviors you want, rather than the behaviors you don't want, it doesn't come naturally. It seems so simple, but it doesn't come naturally. So, you have to practice it. In today’s episode, I’m going to use some simple examples and scenarios which will help you begin to practice this shift from the more authoritarian style of parenting which tends to focus on telling our kids what “not to do,” and move toward some more positive approaches found in Mastermind Parenting. It’s about practicing these skills that let you communicate expectations before things go sideways. It’s figuring out what you want, not what you don’t want. Listen to this episode for more of my thoughts and strategies on how you can move toward being a Mastermind Parent! And as always, thanks for listening, and be sure and head over to Facebook and you can join my free group Mastermind Parenting Community where we post tips and tools and do pop up Live conversations where I do extra teaching and coaching to support you in helping your strong-willed children so that they can FEEL better and DO better. Thanks so much for listening to our podcast! If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it! About Randi Rubenstein Randi Rubenstein helps parents with a strong-willed kiddo become a happier family and enjoy the simple things again like bike rides and beach vacays. She’s the founder of Mastermind Parenting, host of the Mastermind Parenting podcast, and author of The Parent Gap. Randi works with parents across the U.S. At Mastermind Parenting, we believe every human deserves to have a family that gets along. Web/Social Links Website: https://mastermindparenting.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mastermindparenting Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mastermind_parenting/ Resources Discussed/Links li...

We’ve been taking some of recent episodes back to the basics, and today I’m going to unpack the three parenting styles I see most often and explain to you which one I feel is the most effective. (Spoiler alert: Mastermind Parenting, that’s the one that’s most effective.) Now, we’re all inclined to naturally gravitate toward the style we grew up with, that’s what our automatic pilot is going to guide us toward. We all have ideas on what we want to do, which if you’re listening to this podcast, I hope is Mastermind Parenting. But when activated by the “heat of the moment” our emotional brain takes over, it’s just how we’re conditioned. Ok, so the first style is authoritarian parenting. Authoritarian parents believe that kids should follow the rules without exception. Authoritarian parents are famous for saying, “Because I said so” when a child questions the reasons behind a rule. These parents often complain that their child is not obedient, then force punishments when the child doesn’t obey the rules. Next are permissive parents. Rules may be set, but rarely enforced. Few consequences are given out and these parents also feel their children will learn best with little interference.  Permissive parents are lenient. They often only step in when there's a serious problem. They're quite forgiving, and they adopt an attitude of “kids will be kids.” They have a really challenging time with the follow through, and they may give privileges back if a child begs, or they may allow a child to get out of timeout early. Finally, we have authoritative parenting, sometimes called conscious parenting, or gentle parenting. Mastermind Parenting also falls under this category. It’s putting a lot of effort into creating and maintaining a positive relationship with your child. These parents explain the reasons behind the rules. They enforce rules and give consequences but take the child's feelings into consideration. They validate their children's feelings while also making it clear that the adults are ultimately in charge.  And there are a lot of different ways to do this. Authoritative parents invest time and energy into preventing behavior problems before they start, so they are proactive, which is what I believe in. Researchers have found kids who have authoritative parents are most likely to become responsible adults who feel comfortable expressing their opinions. Children raised with authoritative discipline tend to be happy and successful. They're also more likely to be good at making decisions and evaluating safety risks on their own. Mastermind parenting in terms of authoritative parenting is all about. It can be hard to not take your child's behavior personally. But realize when they're pushing your buttons, that's your business and nothing for you to put on them. Children are not responsible for adult feelings. Listen to this episode for more of my thoughts and strategies on how you can move toward being a Mastermind Parent! And as always, thanks for listening, and be sure and head over to Facebook and you can join my free group Mastermind Parenting Community where we post tips and tools and do pop up Live conversations where I do extra teaching and coaching to support you in helping your strong-willed children so that they can FEEL better and DO better. If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it! About Randi Rubenstein Randi Rubenstein helps parents with a strong-willed kiddo become a happier family and enjoy the simple things again like bike rides and beach vacays. She’s the founder of Mastermind Parenting, host of the Mastermind Parenting podcast, and author of The Parent Gap. Randi works with parents across the U.S. At Mastermind Parenting, we believe every human deserves to have a family that gets along. Web/Social Links Website: a

Today we are going to be talking about social media, the online world and how technology impacts kids and how parents struggle to manage it all. I have a special guest, Rania Mankarious, who wrote the book, About The Online World: What You Think You Know and What You Don’t. She wrote this book because parents were telling her how overwhelmed they feel about the online world, and kids tell her they need help and they don’t know how to talk to their parents. We all see the effects of this disconnect every day and hear the tragic stories of kids being hurt by everything from cyberbullies to drugs, identity theft, to addiction, suicide, sexual exploitation, and traffickers. These are good kids and their parents have no idea what’s happening–even the parents who follow and monitor their accounts. In her book, Rania bridges the digital gap between parents and kids so they can develop a family safety plan for their online engagement. Listen to this episode as we discuss many of the challenges parents and kids face online, and some strategies you can use today! As always, thanks for listening, and be sure and head over to Facebook and you can join my free group Mastermind Parenting Community where we post tips and tools and do pop up Live conversations where I do extra teaching and coaching to support you in helping your strong-willed children so that they can FEEL better and DO better. Thanks so much for listening to our podcast! If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it! About Rania Mankarious Rania is a Public Safety Expert and CEO of Crime Stoppers of Houston, with a Masters Degree in Marriage and Family Therapy and a Doctorate of Jurisprudence. She is an avid writer, on-air analyst, lover of people, their stories, and our future. She has been seen and heard on national/local TV and radio for over a decade as a legal, family, crime, mental health, and parenting expert. Citing a personal mission to serve families and engage the public to better society, Rania, a wife and mother of three, is leading by example and making a difference. Web/Social Links LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/rania-mankarious-b180aba/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/theraniareport Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/rania.mankarious.1 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theraniareport/ Resources Discussed/Links Rania’s book, The Online World, What You Think You Know and What You Don’t: https://www.amazon.com/dp/1737885921/ Free Cheat Sheet - Three-Step Recipe for Having a Productive Conversation: https://mastermindparenting.com/productive-conversation/ Live assessment: https://mastermindparenting.com/live-assessment/ Join our Free Facebook Group: www.facebook.com/groups/mastermindparenting

How do you discipline a strong-willed child without spanking or yelling? We’re building on the last two episodes where I started to unpack the topic of how to best discipline your child. Today I’m focusing on how to avoid spanking or yelling. Most parents know that spanking doesn’t work, and yelling doesn’t either, but most households still spank and yell. A lot of us grew up with spanking as part of our family discipline model, and yelling too, so it can be easy to fall back on these as a “go-to” method when we get frustrated and angry. And I am guilty of this as well, and today I share a recent experience where I simply lost it. Yelling and spanking wounds and hurts our kids. Even though these may come naturally to us because of our past, and what was modeled to us, this doesn’t mean we can’t shift and adopt a different approach. Listen in as I break down my personal experience and some others to help you find a kinder and more gentle way to deal with these situations. You, and your kiddos, will be happier and more grounded. As always, thanks for listening, and be sure and head over to Facebook and you can join my free group Mastermind Parenting Community where we post tips and tools and do pop up Live conversations where I do extra teaching and coaching to support you in helping your strong-willed children so that they can FEEL better and DO better. Thanks so much for listening to our podcast! If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it! Web/Social Links Website: https://mastermindparenting.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mastermindparenting Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mastermind_parenting/ Resources Discussed/Links Free Cheat Sheet - Three-Step Recipe for Having a Productive Conversation: https://mastermindparenting.com/productive-conversation/ Live assessment: https://mastermindparenting.com/live-assessment/ Join our Free Facebook Group: www.facebook.com/groups/mastermindparenting

How do you discipline a strong-willed child who just won’t listen? We’re building on last week’s episode where I unpacked the topic of how to best discipline your child, going a little deeper to tackle those stubborn kids. And the more you request they do something or change a behavior, the more they dig in and just won’t budge.  So frustrating, I know. Bing ignored and dismissed when you’re supposedly the authority figure can feel demoralizing, rude, and disrespectful. It also can feel chaotic and stressful, both for you and your child. It brings all these things up for us as parents, and even if we start off nice, sweet, and calm, we can lose our tempers and start commanding or yelling. Listen to this episode where I go through a scenario many of us have likely experienced. I walk you through what might be going on in this situation and give you some tips on how to deal with it if you find yourself headed down this path. I’ll show you how you can be the leader of your own little wolf pack, and command the authority you deserve, while getting your kiddo to make a choice that’s a win-win situation for everyone. We’re going to disrupt the negative attention seeking pattern that may have formed, allowing you to step in and have your voice heard. Again, just like last week, this is one of the most familiar challenges parents face, and one that I often see parents struggle with, but it doesn’t have to be that way! As always, thanks for listening, and be sure and head over to Facebook and you can join my free group Mastermind Parenting Community where we post tips and tools and do pop up Live conversations where I do extra teaching and coaching to support you in helping your strong-willed children so that they can FEEL better and DO better. Thanks so much for listening to our podcast! If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it! Web/Social Links Website Facebook Instagram Takeaways When your child isn’t listening to you or rebelling, it can be demoralizing. If you can’t be the authority, nothing runs smoothly. It can be chaotic and stressful. It feels disrespectful and dismissive, and it hurts. You might feel like you’re not doing your job as a parent, and it can spiral out of control. Your child refuses your request leading to frustration, arguments, and exhaustion. This can be the result of what you were told or modeled in the past. It’s time to be the leader of your pack and command authority. Listen to your kids and understand what is underneath the behavior. Humans crave freedom, so when you try to control, they may rebel. They are trying to get needs met, health and safety comes first. Instead of barking one command, give options that are a win for both of you. It takes a lot of practice and patience, but you can discipline and teach with authority. Resources Discussed/Links li...

How do you discipline your child? This is one of the most familiar challenges parents face, and one that I often see parents get wrong. It can be a struggle to get your kiddo to do what you want them to do, what is expected of them. I get it. In fact, I’m going through it all again right now, with a new puppy! Today I’m going to give you a good definition of discipline, and how it is entirely about teaching, and has nothing to do with punishment. And I know it can be tempting to use a punishment model because you are frustrated, heated in the moment, and maybe that’s what you know from how you were raised. But deep down inside, that’s not what you genuinely want to be doing. So, listen to this episode and get some tips on how to stay grounded and approach the discipline of your child with more teaching, instruction, and grace. I’ll also run you through an example that is all too common and one I’m sure many of you can resonate with, while giving you some tools for success next time you find yourself in this situation. As always, thanks for listening, and be sure and head over to Facebook and you can join my free group Mastermind Parenting Community where we post tips and tools and do pop up Live conversations where I do extra teaching and coaching to support you in helping your strong-willed children so that they can FEEL better and DO better. Thanks so much for listening to our podcast! If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it! Web/Social Links Website Facebook Instagram  Takeaways Discipline means to teach. Little kids are going to have many “accidents” in the house, and this is because they are learning to be alive…what the rules of this tribe are. Put the time in on the front end to teach the skills rather than just expecting kids to learn and getting mad at them for not doing what you expect them to do. When you put your time and effort into telling kids what you expect and teaching  stop fighting with reality - you are in a remarkably busy season of life, and it won’t be this hard forever…you are building a solid foundation. Parenting is establishing the rules, repeating it often and following through consistently. Mastermind Parenting is about mastering your own mind and showing up as the grounded grown up that can think rationally and teach your kids the things you want them to know. Calm people solve problems. And when you can’t be the calm problem-solving adult in your kids’ lives, it’s because you haven’t resolved your own hurts and your self-care is on the back burner. Resources Discussed/Links Free Cheat Sheet - Three-Step Recipe for Having a Productive Conversation  Live assessment