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Mother Pukka

Author: Mother Pukka

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JUST RELEASED: tickets to Dirty Mother Pukka LIVE! on Tue 23 Oct at the AllBright club W1. SEE LINK bit.ly/2yJNUCy.


A panel of mothers, a panel of papas and one simple mission: to Parent the Sh!t out of Life. This is the honest, funny and occasionally grotty podcast for people who happen to be parents.


Mother Pukka (Anna Whitehouse) is a journalist, editor, vlogger and family-flogger. With partner Papa Pukka (Matt Farquharson), they believe parents can laugh through the madness of keeping small humans alive.


Each episode puts grown-up quandaries to a panel of brutally honest mums, followed by a panel of equally frank dads, to reveal the dirty truth of each rung of the parental ladder. Whatever the questions, Dirty Mother Pukka is the #nofilter truth about modern parenting.



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43 Episodes
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In the FIRST-EVER live episode – recorded live at The AllBright women’s club – the female panellists share terrifying tales of baby-prevention techniques, piss-laden pregnancy tests, penis sheathing and the cost of condoms, before the men talk awkwardly about sperm to a room full of women. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.
Who’s the best parent and who do the kids prefer? The panel consider competitive parenting (and how Anna’s dad used a starting pistol to train her for school sports day), a lost muff and what’s in a Puritan’s lunchbox. Plus: presenting a poorly dressed baby to Kylie Minogue, and why the dads all think they’re second-choice parent. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.
At look at rage issues – how to manage them in children and keep a lid on them for yourself, including: being left on the roadside by an angry parent, the 80s trend for smacking, being ‘the bigger person’ out of spite, pretending to move out and how nice it would be to have a toddler tantrum at work. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.
In a special episode, sponsored by Lights by TENA, Anna is joined by Candice Brathwaite and the Scummy Mummies to talk about being a grown woman and accidentally weeing in your knickers. Pregnancy can do cruel things to a woman's body, but it's not just mothers who are affected: one in three women over 35 suffer with bladder weakness at some stage. So give your kegels a squeeze and tune in for a very special episode. ***Please seek medical support if you are suffering from incontinence. Pads are there to support you but the issue needs to be addressed by medical professionals.*** See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.
How long a leash should you give your nippers? And how can you maintain your independence once you have kids? The panels consider the end of ‘pottering’ as a hobby, hiding from your family in the toilet, and tea-making as a childhood right of passage.  See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.
The girls consider kids and slime, the family ‘technology box’, and the lost art of speaking to strangers in bars, while the boys discuss the ‘midlife crisis blue tick’, being married to an Avatar or Smurf, and whether bullying was worse when it was punches in the playground or now, when it’s digital digs that run 24/7. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.
How do you encourage tiny people to love their bodies? How do you remain fond of yours when it’s collapsing? Plus: why the increasing grotesqueness of Joe and Matt sickens midlife gun-pumper Noel, and whether body paint actually tastes better on toast. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.
How to manage the tricky world of childhood friendships, fancying and falling out. And, perhaps more importantly, chumming up to other mums and dads because they happen to be nearby and might want a drink too. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.
How do you explain the great hereafter to someone who can’t tie their own shoelaces? Why has Anna got a pet cemetery at the end of her family garden? And why should you avoid standing in front of a mirror next to your offspring? The series three opener begins with the big questions and how to answer (or avoid) them. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.
When the family triangle becomes a square (or even a pentagon) how does the first child react? How can you make your kids friends when one's trying you eat the other? The panel tackle the travails of siblings. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.
It's the biggie: the end-of-season finale tackles the questions we all want to avoid - where do babies come from? What's this called? Why haven't I got one of those? The male and female panels give their take on educating small people, deflecting through ignorance, and the female equivalent of the word 'willie'. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.
A one-off all-male quickie (not like that) with the dad panellists confessing what their other halves think of them airing the family laundry on air. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.
Half the panellists are dyslexic, and no-one' s really sure how phonics works, so how should we educate our small people? The panels talk home v classroom and what really matters in educashun. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.
A look back at episode 18, and why Matt's face is melting faster than the baddie at the end of Raiders of the Lost Ark. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.
Who does what in the relentless doggy paddle of domestic life? The boys and girls confess to tales of strife and how to combat them, from managing basic family sustenance and hygiene to dry humping by the dryer. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.
Matt and Anna consider the porn episode, and the lessons to be learnt from a Dutch 'hand job tutor' See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.
Is it OK to watch porn? Can it ever be a social activity or is it a strictly solo endeavour? And what on earth is cake-farting? In this episode, the panels discuss the morality of grot, the misadventures of 'friends' and the battle of print versus digital, before Noel goes in to some detail on the merits of 'hentai' (it involves eels). See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.
Matt and Anna look back at the last episode and quickly deviate to speculation about E.T.'s toilet habits. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.
The panels get worthy (very briefly) as they discuss kids and feminism and trying to keep their tiny people chauvinism free. Also contains gags about genitals. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.
Matt and Anna compare notes on their Christmas and fail to make any resolutions. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.
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