Mothers Matter

What is life like when you give up work to look after your children full time?  Lisa, Laura and Victoria all open up about why they chose to leave paid work, what they like about being able to care for their children full time, and what the challenges are.  They have all set up local groups for Mothers at Home Matter, in Ashford, Belfast and Sheffield.  They talk us through their daily routines and explain how they are able to afford to survive on one salary.  

Talking about suicide does not make it more likely that someone will end their life, it really shows that you care.  Rachel, a counsellor from  Papyrus,a UK charity for the prevention of young suicide, discusses with me what may lead someone to consider ending their life and how mothers or any concerned others can help prevent it happening. Counsellors such as Rachel are available on the Hopeline 0800 086 4141.  This is a safe podcast which doesn't include examples of individuals or methods and has been approved by Papyrus.  We do mention suicide frequently though.  Other charities mentioned are Cruse Bereavement Support,Survivors of Bereavement by Suicide, and the film After Shaun. LivingWorks is a charity which provides training in suicide intervention.  

What does 'normal' teenage behaviour look like? Erica Komisar, psychoanalyst, parent coach and author answers this and so many other questions. How can we maintain good mental health when our teenagers tell us we are useless?  Why are teenagers attracted to risky behaviour and what can parents do about it?  Do teenagers face more pressure today than in the past?  'Chicken Little, the Sky isn't Falling: Raising Resilient Adolescents in the New Age of Anxiety' is the title of Erica Komisar's new book, and the source of a whole podcast's worth of questions.  This podcast is for any parents of adolescents (which is recognised as 9-25).

What does 'success' look like for girls today?  How do we help our daughters cope with pressure, both from themselves and from society?  What is holding women back in the workplace?  Jo Wimble-Groves, author of the new book, Rise of the Girl, joins me to discuss how we can raise girls who thrive.  Jo runs her own business, is a founder of the organisation We are Girls in Sport, is a frequent speaker in school and is a mum of three.  She is an inspiration to girls and their mothers.  

Considering how your baby or child, and therefore you, can get more sleep often dominates a parent's waking, of which there are often many, hours.  Lyndsey Hookway, an expert in infant and child sleep, joins me to explore what a normal sleep pattern looks like for infants, strategies to help children sleep,  and how and why to try to stay calm in the middle of the night when your child has woken up AGAIN.  Lyndsey is the author of several books, including 'Let's talk about your new family's sleep' and 'Still awake'.  Her website is www.lyndseyhookway.com   Podcast production by James Ede of Be Heard. 

Finding time to invest in your marriage whilst raising small (or tall) children is a challenge.  Michaela Hyde, Director of the Marriage Foundation, and a wife, outlines her recipe for a healthy marriage while I throw out all the issues I find being married with children produces.  We also discuss how being married can help parents stay together, and the real statistics behind cohabiting and divorce.  

Being unable to have the number of children you'd hoped for is so sad but secondary infertility is hardly ever discussed openly. It is emotionally exhausting coping with the relentless nature of keeping on trying either naturally or through IVF or other methods.  My guest in this podcast and I have both experienced hoping for another child who never came along, along my guest is young enough to still have hope and I am old enough to know how the story ends.  This podcast unpacks the emotional rollercoaster (with mainly downs rather than ups) of trying for a sibling.  

Universal Credit (UC) is now the main way of accessing government support for mothers whose income is low or non-existent.  Patricia Exley, a Citizens Advice manager, runs through the type of support available through UC, how to apply for it, and what the work commitments may be for those on UC. We also cover everything else I can think of to ask about, including the Disability Living Allowance for children.  To calculate how much you could get please see Entitledto or Turn2Us.  For more info on claiming UC see Universal Credit service or call the DWP on 0800 328 5644.  For help in claiming UC see Citizens Advice The general advice line is 0800 144 8848 for any topic.   Thanks as always to James Ede of Be Heard for production of the podcast.

Attachment parenting is largely about meeting the needs of the child for love, security and closeness in the early days and beyond.  It has become possibly the mainstream parenting approach, or aspiration.  In this podcast Michelle McHale, Founder and Director of Attachment Parenting UK, outlines what it does and doesn't mean to adopt an attachment parenting style.  Positive discipline is an integral part of attachment parenting which led us to a discussion of what to do if your toddler is having a tantrum in a public place (and everyone is watching).  Thanks to my producer, James Ede of Be Heard productions.  

Three mothers join me to talk about what home means to them, what the role of mothers is in creating and maintaining the home, the essentials of a happy home and why the idea of homemaking is so undervalued in society.  You can follow Molly, Elain and Caz on Instagram on Mothering Through the Seasons (Molly), Five Kids Gallacher (Elain) and Dr Caz Leadership of Mums (Caz).  You hear more of Molly on her podcast Mended Teacups.  

£3,763 was the amount of total unsecured debt per UK adult in Jan 2021. Lone parents are the most likely group to suffer persistent poverty, and single mothers are the most likely to experience in-work poverty.  In this podcast, Fiona Lloyd, from the charity Christians Against Poverty (CAP), explains, step by step, how to become debt free.  CAP helped 2,500 adults pay off all their debts in 2020, and are helping around 8,800 clients at any one time.  I hope this podcast episode will help mothers struggling with financial worries.

My neighbour, Kate, and I are both first time dog owners.  In this episode we go into the challenges we've faced and are still struggling with, and, despite this, the overwhelming love we feel for our dogs.  Kate has Toph, a one year old black cockerdor, I have Lola, a 4 year old golden retriever.  For more harrowing details on those first six months, see my Wordpress blog theamateurdogowner  

In just a few lines of poetry my guest, Sarra Culleno, can encapsulate the experience of being a new mother, the deep-rooted impact our own mothers still have on us as mothers, the agony of separation from our loved ones in lockdown, the fear of waiting for a medical test result, the shift in identity between couples when a baby is born or the hurly burly of daily family life.  In this podcast we discuss these themes and more, whilst examining the craft and creation of poetry.  Sarra Culleno is a British BAME poet, mother and teacher who performs her writing at events across the UK.  She is widely published, was longlisted for the Cinnamon Press Pamphlet Prize and for Best of the Net 2020 by iambapoet.  Thanks to James Ede, my producer.

The cultivation of joy and the virtues which make up a developed character are the subjects of this in depth and thought-provoking discussion with Dr Matthew Kuan Johnson, a Research Fellow on the Oxford Character Project and possibly the leading researcher on the philosophy of joy.  

Playing with children can be great fun, but also hard work, especially at 6am.  In this podcast Dr Pat Preedy offers parents excellent examples of how to enjoy our children through play, whether they are 4 months or 14 years old.   Dr Pat jointly led the Parents and Carers as Play Partners Project through Middlesex Uni (Dubai), which supported parents in providing their children with play experiences that enhance their development and learning.  She has also contributed to The Physical Development Needs of Young Children (2019), highlighting how play and early movements are linked to cognitive development.  She is best known for her Movement for Learning  project for schools, which highlighted how daily movements based on children's development stages can improve balance, fine and gross motor skills.  More details of Dr Pat's work is available on www.neuroway.ae

Thanks in large part to Diane Danzebrink and Rachel Weiss, my guests on this podcast, the menopause is being covered more often in the media, but there is still a huge amount of ignorance as to what the symptoms are and how to cope with them.  Diane, the founder of Menopause Support and the driving force behind the #makemenopausematter campaign, shares her personal experience of the menopause with us, and runs through some of the many and varied symptoms of the menopause and perimenopause.  Rachel, founder of the Menopause Cafes outlines why talking about the menopause can be so helpful, and shares the experiences of some of her visitors to the cafe.  She is also behind #FlushFest21, details on her website.  Please remember support is always available with the Samaritans by calling  116 123. 

Finding work which fits around being available full time for your children is challenging.  In this podcast I chat with 3 mothers who have managed to achieve this and who are willing to share their advice.  Elizabeth is so busy she can now turn away work as she takes on micro jobs for companies such as Appen, Tamsin helps mothers to identify their niche and set up their own companies, and Sarah has set up and runs Curly Cow which sells gluten-free sweets.   Many thanks to my producer, James Ede of Be Heard 

Celebrating 30 years of the campaign and support group, Mothers at Home Matter, I have the joy of asking the Chair, Anne Fennell, all the tricky questions I've been asked as a media contact, such as 'isn't it a luxury to have a mother at home?' (spoiler alert: yes but it shouldn't be) and 'why do single income families pay more tax?'  I also chat with Becca Woollgar about why she set up local groups for mothers and what a joy volunteering is.  Her email is groups@mothersathomematter.com if you would like to join one.  Thanks as ever to my superb producer, James Ede at Be Heard and this was recorded on the new fangled Squadcast   

Welcome to series 2 of the Mothers Matter podcast.  I'm joined by Zoe Gilbey, Nutritional Therapist, to discuss the joys of trying to feed our children (and ourselves) food which they like and is also good for them, in the time available.  We also discuss how food affects our immune system, the impact of stress on how we digest food, how to use food to stimulate the parasympathetic nervous system, what that even means, and much more. 

Tosh Brittan, aka the Divorce Goddess, was a stay at home mother, working for the family company, when she got divorced.  She worked hard for a non-confrontational divorce, rooted in kindness and mindfulness.  In this podcast she recalls the challenges she faced, not least in her own attitude, to achieve this, and how she came to set up Divorce Goddess to help couples transform the divorce and separation experience through the use of mindfulness and other tools. We delve particularly deeply into the issue of how to handle anger against certain individuals, not saying that is an issue I have....Tosh is particularly encouraging for non-earning mothers who are facing the prospect of divorce.