“No dogs on the moon. No dogs in this episode.” A new guest appears on the podcast! Mal from Demigod Debut is allergic to cats and has never read the Kane Chronicles, but she loves and has a deep respect for cats, which is the only requirement for being on the Bastet episode. Other topics include ancient people being just like us, finger knives, great parties with lots of wine, pondering if the gods of the Riordanverse hang out with other pantheons, the complicated history of feline d...
“I didn't dig too deep because I didn't want to see pictures of scorpions!” If this episode was just about Serket, it would be 15 minutes long. So, she's being joined in this episode by another goddess! Can you guess who? (DJ sure can!) Other topics include DJ’s delivering some excellent wordplay, Darien's deep fear of even digital scorpions, divine support in the marriage bed, DJ guessing Darien's attempt at a twist, a shout-out for Shucked, Darien struggling to pronounce the word “sphere,...
“Ma’at’s not being done right…” This episode about it's a roundup episode featuring Geb, Tefnut, Shu, and Nut!! One of these could have been its own episode. Can you guess which?? Other topics include DJ ruining the Geb section of the episode, Wikipedia’s citations proving the article wrong, Darien having the hardest time with names, homophones, and a really neat astrophysicist. Content Warning: This episode contains mentions of and conversations about gun violence, death, and the aft...
“You’re supposed to represent power!” This episode about Egyptian mythology also includes history about The Great Race for Mercy, during which Darien mistakenly refers to an important sled dog as “Fox” when his name was actually Togo. Deepest apologies. Those responsible have been sacked. Other topics include many Horus Variants, a Peregrine Falcon PSA, Young Horus as a symbol of hope, a very cool-sounding festival tradition that was probably pretty meh actually, strategic connections t...
“Sets’s favorite food: [**censored**]” Our first guest of season seven!! Charlie (they/them) from Of the Eldest Gods (and other shows) joins the main feed for the first time to unpack Set, god of chaos, storms, and the outsiders. Other topics include better examining growth chaos as a tool for good and stagnant order as evil, Uncle Amos’ trauma being dismissed for the sake of a cool ending, Darien spiraling out while trying to research this episode, a very icky way of determining the ri...
“He was a very leaky mummy.” This week, we bring an episode about Osiris that's a serving of mozzarella sticks without sauce sides. Feel free to bring your own sauces!! Other topics include relitigating the podcast stance that the gods should have been shaped by their contemporary human hosts, the origins of the pharaoh's royal symbols, Rick Riordan using fanfic as a source again, a fish’s favorite snack, and the answer to life, the universe, and everything. Content Warning: This epis...
“What do you call a haunted house in Egypt?” Isis. Protector of Pharaohs. Guardian of the Dead. Goddess of Magic. Perhaps the most influential of all Egyptian deities. So, what’s the deal with that whole getting rid of Ra to put her husband on the throne, thing? Not very Ma’at of her, if you ask us. Other topics include the fear-amids, mythological details regarding the timing of the Snake Bite Incident, a trouble pattern of choices made by Rick Riordan, where the name “Eset” co...
“My boy Osiris did nothing wrong.” Nephthys: Wife of Set, goddess of the river. Right? Other topics include names for Egyptian musical groups, Nephthys’ very stylish hat, winged-women being a good look, the most surreal group of midwives, the shifting trend of sibling marriage, late editions to the Nephthys myth, Darien not being even remotely fluent in German, another rewrite of The Kane Chronicles, things Riordan would rather do than get Apollo out of Olympus. Content Warning: This episod...
“They don't got Ra on their side.” Catch a ride in one of your two posh solar rides and explore the many aspects of Ra. Other topics include giving Riordan too much credit about why Ra would care about Walt, Darien taking taking a hard stance regarding the historical accuracy of the Genesis flood narrative, a call for someone to edit a few pages of the Riordan Wiki, the difference between scarab beetles and “shoe bugs,” the three seasons of Ancient Egypt, and why Ra was the only god who...
“Thanks, Cleopatra…” Does order and chaos actually appear as themes in Ancient Egypt? Yes! Other topics include the co-hosts again harping on Riordan not leaning into the Kanes representing chaos as a positive for ce, the state of Idaho being held together with duct tape and paperclips, DJ continuing being weirdly anti-sand, Darien’s fight to verify sources from Wikipedia, speculations around the sun, and Riordan dropping the ball on giving us goddess Ma’at.” Content Warning: This epi...
"Gotta find the Rosetta Stone." Part two of the longest notes Darien has ever compiled for the show. Other topics include Egypt still being really old with a lot going on, DJ dropping the ball on the rule of threes, Darien spending a lot of time talking about powerful women, Egyptian cultural artifacts that aren’t in Egypt (but really should be), Google AI being terrible, and an announcement to never cite this podcast in any academic context. Content Warning: This episode ...
“This is not a place for grieving; it is a place for rest.” Part one of the longest notes Darien has ever compiled for the show. Other topics include Egypt being really old with a lot going on, the true purpose of pyramids, Darien refusing to be distracted by DJ’s shenanigans, a brief pitstop to look up all Seven Wonders of the Ancient World, how annoying it would be to get call in for pyramid duty on your day off, celebrations of corn and leavened bread, and some perhaps unfair c...
“Riordan, will you just commit harder?!” And we close out the Kane Chronicles with Darien and DJ complaining about a book they claimed to have enjoyed. Other topics include a real underwhelming “cost” for beating the big bad, DJ having two nickels, still waiting for a pay off for Ruby Kane’s “other gods” drop, wanting to see Riordan commit harder to his concepts, Darien’s favorite scene of the series, a defense of Chaos being good and necessary, and Riordan needing to commit harder to ...
“Your toys look funner than mine!” It’s book two of the Kane Chronicles! Was DJ right about Apophis taking over the Oracle of Delphi? No, of course not. Other topics include both host being bested by the book description, the framing device breaking down again, dreaming of the day when Riordan will finally tear down the walls, Sadie seriously over sharing, that fella Walt, acknowledging that Percabeth is, in fact, the greatest love story ever told, justice for vultures, and trying to nu...
“All major snakes in mythology are just the same fucking snake.” Time to enter the land of the pharaohs! Join Darien (she/they) and DJ (he/him) as they start their journey through Rick Riordan’s The Kane Chronicles. Other topics include a sort of muddy lore, DJ trying to uncover the mystery of why the Kane Chronicles audiobooks aren’t readily available, when exactly Bast was hanging out in Manhattan, a good, old fashioned “My God is stronger than your god” fight, obvious traps, ag...
“Odin is a Horse Girl, confirmed.” It’s episode 100!!! Tim (he/him) and AJ (he/they) from The Standby Line Podcast join the show to talk about (read: aggressively dunk on) Odin! Other topics include the deal with runes, the Eye of Odin often being more prominent in media than Odin himself, Mimir being the “head guy,” Odin’s obsession with Undercover Boss, Frigg’s perplexing history, the goal of the show to be a tasting tray and not a comprehensive lecture, Odin’s many animal friends, Darien...
“I cast fall into an open chasm!” Robert (they/them) from TheDamMemePage is Finally!! One silly lil guy here to talk about another silly lil guy, Loki.* *Citation needed. Other topics include a group mourning session for Uncle Randolph, the lack of agreement regarding the meaning of Loki’s name, the lack of agreement regarding the role of Loki’s parents, which ancient Icelandic poet DJ would most like to have a beer with, the amount of horsepower in an eight-legged horse, the amount of evi...
"The fact that Thor didn't solve this problem by hitting him with Mjolnir is shocking." It's a big one! Perhaps THE biggest topic of Norse mythology. Other topics include the trend of naming kids after Thor during the Viking Age, all the things Snorri (probably) invented, Thor's strategy for dealing with unwanted potential-in-laws, Darien not liking most of Rick Riordan's Choices regarding adapting Norse mythology, and DJ spending too much money to get a Thor SMITE skin. Spoilers for Mar...
“This hand is mine now.” It's time to tackle the original Big, Bad Wolf, Fenrir! Other topics include the under-examined tragedy of Fenrir's backstory, a collection of no longer perplexing paradoxes, the foot guy, super cool natural phenomena that may have inspired the legend of Fenrir's sons, and a satisfying conclusion of the DJ Interrupts the Show to Talk About the Time Wolves Sieged Paris bit. Spoilers for Hogfather, SMITE, Puss and Boots: The Last Wish, and The Amazing Maurice and His ...
“Were the Norse a fatalistic people?” Is this episode Fates 2.0? Not exactly… Other topics include the Norn as caretakers of the World Tree, which Norn is working two jobs, a more nuisance interpretation of name meanings, and examining Riordan's choice to use the Norn the same way the Fates were used in PJO (we don't love it). Spoilers for Kingdoms of Amalur, American Gods (novel), Wicked + Divine, and Ys 10. Content Warning: This episode contains mentions of and conversations about deat...