Once Upon A Gene

Have you ever celebrated another child’s milestone while quietly wondering why your own child hasn’t reached it? Or caught yourself thinking, “Their kid can walk, talk, and eat - why do they think this is so hard?” We don’t love admitting it. But maybe we could talk about it. In this Effisode, I’m brainstorming about comparison in parenting our kids with disabilities, including my own moments of seeing other children with CTNNB1 syndrome reach milestones and wondering whether I missed something with Ford. I know how much I’ve poured into supporting him. And yet, sometimes that little voice still asks, “Did I do enough?” I explore how comparison slips into guilt and shame, why it can hit harder when we’re tired or overwhelmed, and how it creates silence within the very communities we turn to for connection. Some families hesitate to share their hardest days. Others hold back their good news.

Colorado Mama Tribe invited me out to talk about storytelling. What I found was even more than I had hoped for. They did it. They figured it out - at least some of it. And what hasn’t been solved yet already has bones. That’s the falling into place. Not one perfect click. More like dominoes. One mama tells the truth. The next one doesn’t have to start from nothing. The piece that was missing finds the piece that was waiting, and suddenly the whole line can move. Little bites from the women in that room, recorded and stitched together as a memento for them and a field guide for anyone who needs one. Think of it as a pocket bible of mama wisdom: the advice they wish they’d heard sooner, the lines they keep repeating to each other, the stuff that only lands when it comes from someone who’s lived it. You’re not alone. A tribe can be built wherever you are. It takes work. It’s worth it. Thank you, Colorado Mama Tribe, for letting me see what falling into place can look like for all of us.

Effie welcomes Matt Abernethy, a father and biotech executive whose story feels almost too perfectly timed to be real. Matt’s youngest son, Ian (now 13), was diagnosed with classic congenital adrenal hyperplasia (CAH) at age two. While navigating the overwhelm, fear, and daily stress of managing a rare disease, Matt received a cold recruiter call for a CFO role at Neurocrine Biosciences — a company actively developing a treatment for CAH. He and his wife Brittany made the leap of faith, moving their family from Indiana to San Diego. Matt kept his personal connection private for years so he could lead objectively. Eventually, he shared his story in an emotional all-company meeting. Ian later became the first patient to receive the newly approved medication. Matt opens up about being a “dadvocate,” the role of faith through the hardest times, what he would tell his overwhelmed past self, the importance of seeking expert care, and communicating with your spouse. It’s a powerful, hope-filled conversation about divine timing, resilience, and the human side of drug development.

Hannah Lowe is back on the show. In this episode, Effie and Hannah discuss do not resuscitate orders for children with rare diseases. Hannah shares her experience with her son Austin and how the conversation around DNRs came up for their family. They talk about the decision-making process, how feelings around these choices can change over time, and why these conversations matter in the rare disease community. The episode also touches on planning ahead, the emotional side of these decisions, and the importance of having these talks before a crisis hits. In this episode: Hannah’s update on Austin and the L-CMD Research Foundation How the DNR conversation first came up for their family The personal and practical side of these decisions Why more open discussion is needed in the community Links: Hannah’s first appearance on the show (Episode 108): effieparks.com/podcast/episode-108-hannah-lowe-lcmd-research-foundation L-CMD Research Foundation Instagram Listen now and subscribe for more conversations on rare disease life, advocacy, and family stories.

Bryan Docobo — attorney, father, rare disease advocate, and founder of the Coats Plus Foundation. Bryan opens up about the devastating journey of losing his four-year-old son Ethan to Coats Plus Syndrome (a rare telomere disorder caused by a CTC1 gene mutation) in June 2024, while fiercely fighting for his older son Liam, who is also battling the same condition. Bryan shares the pre-diagnosis struggles, the shocking moment of Liam’s grand mal seizure that led to the diagnosis, the science behind the disease (telomere dysfunction affecting blood vessels, brain, eyes, and GI tract), and the proactive steps his family has taken. These include pushing for Avastin (anti-VEGF) treatment that has stopped brain calcifications and leukodystrophy progression in Liam, stem cell infusions showing clinical improvements, and an ambitious push for personalized gene therapy (requiring $3–5 million in funding).He also discusses the profound grief that transformed into purpose, including losing 80 pounds, deepening his spirituality, and founding the Luminary Tribe — a growing men’s support community in South Florida (with plans to expand) focused on vulnerability, connection, and helping high-achieving men show up stronger for their families. This episode is a masterclass in resilience, advocacy, fatherhood, and turning unimaginable pain into meaningful action that could help not just Coats Plus families but the broader rare disease and longevity communities. Links: Coats Foundation LUMENARY Instagram Bryan's Instagram