Orks R Dorks

The day has come. Frank Johnnie Kennedy will battle Orky Mike for ownership of the orb in which Frank's brother's soul is contained. Who will win? Will John Frankie Kennedy ever be released from the orb?

The First (And Last?) Proper episode of Eldar Smelldar.    Timestamps 0 m00s - Theme Tune 0m17s - Intro to the Show 1m09s - Jokes about Space Elves 3m 58s - 20th Century Indian Politics 10m 13s - Learn Your Erogenous Zones with Warhammer 40k 10m 36s - Besmirchment of Sir Salonga - Rebuttal 13m 43s - Who Would Win? 14m 44s - Sexy Ork Corner 16m 02s - End of the Show

I, Mike Salonga, have taken over JFK's Podcast and renamed it Eldar Smelldar. Before our first proper episode, enjoy episode 0 which is me dramatically retelling the time I was awoken by a horny Ork and what happened next. Its very explicit and not for the faint hearted, but that's what you get when you love an Ork.

In this month's episode we cover:   Learn your Alphabet with Warhammer 40K Jokes About Orks 19th Century US Politics Hidden Costs: Warhammer and Canal Boating Everything is Better with Eldar

In this months episode we have: Jokes about Orks 19th Century Politics about Eli Saulsbury of Delaware A is for Aeldari Who would win? An Ork Rap

We've rerecorded this as the all computer voice version doesn't sit right with us anymore. There are some minor changes so keep an ear out for them .For completionists, please listen to this between the episodes “the saga of Grutgar and Salonga” and the episode “The Return” for it to make the most sense.Probably worth listening to the "Lace is Ace" episode too. 00.00 Introduction 00:39 Theme Tune 00:55 Brenda's Funeral - The Vicar 03:26 Reading from Egyptian Book of The Dead 04:37 Amazing Grace by Waylon Thornton and the Heavy Hands 05:57 Eulogies 07:57 Final Thoughts 08:39 A Surprise Guest 09:02 Exit Theme 09:11 Credits      In this episode you heard:   Sassy Clyde as The Vicar Chris Hartmann as The Verger, who can be found at www.chris-hartmann-vocalart.de Loretta R as Brenda’s Friend Dave Koby as Jim Bund Ged C as The Butcher and Barton Beeples Kennedy   All music heard on today’s episode was licensed under a creative commons licence and can be found on freemusicarchive.org. You heard:   The Orks R Dorks episode theme  is Make it Drums by Daedalus.  The Church Organ is Free Choral Church Organ by Lobo Loco Amazing Grace performed by  Waylon Thornton and The Heavy Hands All sound effects were sourced from freesound.org You can find all of our past episodes at orksrdorks,podbean.com and we’d love to hear from you as we’re still on twitter @Johnloves40k for our sins.    

Finally all will be revealed about the fate of the world and how John Frankie Kennedy plays into it.    00:00 Pre-Credits (With Guest Stars) 02:03 Theme Tune 02:12 Task 1 03:19 Task 2 04:34 Task 3 06:01 Task 4 07:13 Task 5 07:56 Really? This Guy? 11:45 Credits 12:34 Marvel Style Post Credits   In this episode you heard:   John Frankie Kennedy Barton Beeples Kennedy Jeremiah Postlethwaite Michael Salonga Nicole from the  Doom Generation Podcast Eden “The Queer Buccaneer” MW, See them for your Graphic Design Needs EdenMW.com Erin from the Myth Monsters Podcast  Cam Sully from the Jacked Up Review Show Podcast  All music heard on today’s episode was licensed under a creative commons licence and can be found on freemusicarchive.org. The Orks R Dorks episode is Make it Drums by Daedalus.  All sound effects were sourced from freesound.org You can find all of our past episodes at orksrdorks,podbean.com and we’d love to hear from you. Email is JFK@orksrdorks.co.uk and we’re still on twitter @Johnloves40k.   

A (rejected) sketch/audio mash up/whatever for the The Skewer. Which if you've not listened to you should. 

This month we've some bespoke poems from John to get you in the Christmas Mood.   0.00 - 0.28 - Theme Tune and Intro 0.28 - 1.07 - A Visit from Saint Nick 1.07 - 4.14 - The Three Aeldari 4.14 - 4.40 - Closing Comments and Theme Tune 4.40 - 5.20 - Credits 5.20 - 8.06 - Christmas Bonus Features

Due to illness, we've a change from our expected continuation of John and Barton's adventures as we check in on one of our favourite podcasts "Margey's Meaty Moments". So dive in for Recipes, Spielberg's "The Post" and Porcine Poetry.

Barton is finally going to explain to John what's going on, but will the explanation make John's life any easier?   Pre-Credits: 00:00 - 00:38 Credits - 00:38 - 00:47 Book One: Beginnings - 00:47 - 07:05 Book Two: Judgements - 07:05 - 12:17 Theme and Outro - 12:17 - 12:57     Thank you for listening to Orks R Dorks: The Chosen One. In this episode you heard:   John Frankie Kennedy and Barton Beeples Kennedy 2033.   All music heard on today’s episode was licensed under a creative commons licence and can be found on freemusicarchive.org and our theme music is Make it Drums by Daedalus.   All sound effects were sourced from freesound.org   You can find all of our past episodes at orksrdorks,podbean.com and we’d love to hear from you. Email is JFK@orksrdorks.co.uk and we’re on twitter @Johnloves40k.  

John and Barton are the prisoners of Pope Pius IX (Oh and Ash and Burr are there too in a sack). How are they going to get out of this mess? The already tenuous links to Warhammer 40k begin to fray even further.    John Frankie Kennedy and Barton Kennedy were played by themselves The Creepy Prisoner was played by Lewis Staples Pope Pius the ninth was played by Stefano Trillini Ash Routh was unwittingly playing themselves Our theme tune is Make it Drums by Daedalus, which can be found a freemusicarchive.org All sound effects and other adverts were found at freesound.org   We’d love to hear from you so please drop us a message on twitter @Johnloves40K or email at JFK@ORKSRDORKS.CO.UK. We’d also love more people to hear from us so please tell your friends and family to check out the show.

This month Orks R Dorks is heading into space.    00.00 - 00.20 - Pre-Credits 00.20 - 00.25 - Theme Tune 00.25 - 01.05  - Show Intro 01.05 - 02.14 - Tour of the Ship 02.14 - 03.10 - 19th Century Space Flight 03.10 - 05.01 - Dad Arrives 05.01 - 06.45 - Dad Arrives Again 06.45 - 09.30 - Il Papa 09.30 - 10.20 - End Credits and Theme   Thank you for listening to Orks R Dorks: Apollo 19. In this episode you heard:   John Frankie Kennedy, Barton Beeples Kennedy 2023, Barton Beeples Kennedy 2033 and Pope Pius the 9th   All music heard on today’s episode was licensed under a creative commons licence and can be found on freemusicarchive.org and our theme music is Make it Drums by Daedalus.   All sound effects were sourced from freesound.org   You can find all of our past episodes at orksrdorks,podbean.com and we’d love to hear from you. Email is JFK@orksrdorks.co.uk and we’re on twitter @Johnloves40k.

In this episode of Orks R Dorks we have a huge interview with Henry Cavill, well sort of.   Intro: 00.00 to 00:37 The Big Interview: 00:37 to 05.11 JFK touches a Hat 05.11 to 05.13 The Fallout 05:13 to 06:54 Outro and Credits 06:54 to 07:37   Thank you for listening to Orks R Dorks: Man of Lille   John Frankie Kennedy was played by himself Henri the Rat was played by Cravenborne Jameison Human Host was played by well we never got a chance to ask him his name before he was carted off The Magical Kingdom Copper wasn’t called Brian, that was the silent copper off-mic.We did get his badge number though, VKCO 1066 Our Theme tune is Make it Drums by Daedulus, available at freemusicarchive.org All Sound effects were found at freesound.org   If you’ve enjoyed the show, please tell your friends to check out orksrdorks.podbean.com or email us at jfk@orksrdorks.co.uk

John Frankie Kennedy is back from the Orb and he's taking aim at the pretenders to his Orks R Dorks crown.    In this episode you heard:   Charles Morton as Burr Corrin Caccioppo as Ash Eddie O’Keeffe as Doctor Ork, Auks or Dork Host and Colin Garthy Hornstout as Grutgar, Bildung Brookmeyer and The Police Loud Hailer John Frankie Kennedy as Himself Margaret Brown as Agony Aunt Janey and Frunget the investment Ork Michael Salonga as Orky Mike Shirley Halse as Kelly,Tiffany, Spongel the chef   All music heard on today’s episode was licensed under a creative commons licence and can be found on freemusicarchive.org   Our theme music is Make it Drums by Daedalus Orks O.R Dorks Theme music is Faith in Humanity by Audiorezout Orks Or Dorks Theme is New Game by Kirk Osamayo The Awks or Dork music is Jerry's Back by Crowander The music for Orks: Ore Dorks is Ah Tuba Ah Tuba Tuba by Trans Atlantic Rage You can find us our past episodes at orksrdorks,podbean.com and we’d love to hear from you. Email is JFK@orksrdorks.co.uk and we’re on twitter @Johnloves40k

Ash and Burr are in therapy, but what does that have to do with Orks R Dorks and the Kennedy Clan?    Theme: 00:00 to 00:16 "The Return" :  00:16 to 10:29 ???????: 10:31 to 12:37

NOTE: This has now been re-recorded as Brenda's Funeral Redux, this time with real people. A couple of episodes ago Brenda Kennedy died and we have not yet been able to mourn that loss properly. This audio is the recording of her funeral held at St. Paul and Mark's Church in the parish of Great Horkesley in Colchester. 00:00 - Intro to service 00:05 - Reverend Dunley Whitfield shares their eulogy 01:37 - A reading from the Egyptian book of the dead 02:27 - Amazing Grace (feat. Timbo)byFather Sleep 03:51 - Memories of Brenda's friends 05:11 - Final words and Memorial Silence 05:40 - A Surprise Guest 06:06 - Theme tune and credits

None of the Kennedys were available this month to help with the podcast so instead we've got a taste of what is happening in other parts of the Orkniverse away from the ongoing family drama.   In "The Saga of Grutgar Versus Salonga", Grutgar takes exception to the filth which has been being spread online about him and seeks justice. And maybe finds more than that as he does.  Featuring Grutgar and Pixley Zook as themselves.   Intro - 0.0 to 0.21 The Saga 0.21 to 11.54 Outro: 11.54 to 12.27

Brenda takes over the show this month with an episode of Lace is Ace.   00:00 - 00:55 - Intro 00:55 - 02:32 - Jokes about Knitters 02:32 - 03.15 - 18th Century French Politics 03:15- 04:43 - All about the Normans 04:43- 07:18 - All About Lace 07:18 - 07:48 - Theme and Credits 07:48 - 08:13 - Post Credits Sequence

A very short message about the Queen, we haven't had time to edit this much as this message is from the heart.