Parenthood Prep

The patriarchy isn't just a buzzword thrown around by feminists. It's a system of assumptions that shows up in your daily life, especially once you become a parent.   From the moment a baby arrives, fathers get praised for basic caregiving while mothers face relentless scrutiny and impossible standards. These patterns affect everyone, including the men who feel pressure to be instantly competent or worry that caring for their own children is somehow unmanly.   Tune in this week as I'm joined by my part-time co-host, Margaret Mason Tate, to unpack how these ingrained patterns affect families from day one and how to make parenting fairer for everyone. From pediatricians calling mom even when dad is listed as primary contact, to the myth of "natural maternal instinct" setting unrealistic expectations for women, we explore the ways assumptions and societal pressures show up in caregiving.   Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://happyfamilyafter.com/75   Want to join the fun and never miss an episode? Subscribe to Happy Family After on your favorite podcast app! Follow us on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/happyfamilyafter/ or visit https://HappyFamilyAfter.com to ask questions, share your thoughts, or even roast your baby (yes, really!).   Need real-life support? Learn more about our in-home postpartum and newborn care services here: https://happyfamilyafter.com/in-home-care/   Send us a DM on Instagram here https://www.instagram.com/happyfamilyafter/ or on my personal Instagram here https://www.instagram.com/delvadean/

If you're drowning in a sea of baby apps, video monitors, and spreadsheets of diaper logs, this episode is your lifeline.   Join me this week as I break down newborn monitoring in a way that actually makes sense.   From those first few days when keeping an eye on wet diapers matters, to later months when timing every nursing session becomes overkill, you'll learn how to find a balance between useful monitoring and obsessive tracking. I share strategies for using apps and monitors as tools - not sources of stress - so you can stay present, enjoy your baby, and not let the data dictate your sanity.   Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://happyfamilyafter.com/74   Want to join the fun and never miss an episode? Subscribe to Happy Family After on your favorite podcast app! Follow us on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/happyfamilyafter/ or visit https://HappyFamilyAfter.com to ask questions, share your thoughts, or even roast your baby (yes, really!).   Need real-life support? Learn more about our in-home postpartum and newborn care services here: https://happyfamilyafter.com/in-home-care/   Send us a DM on Instagram here https://www.instagram.com/happyfamilyafter/ or on my personal Instagram here https://www.instagram.com/delvadean/

Trying to snap back to your pre-baby self while also transforming into a completely different version of you is… exhausting. Society tells you to be exactly who you were before kids, but also to revolve entirely around your children. The result? Many parents feel lost in the push and pull of identity, wondering if "them" even still exists under all the diapers, feedings, and middle-of-the-night chaos.   This week, I'm joined by Jacqueline Gates, coach and stage performer extraordinaire, who spent 25 years in theater while raising two children. She shares how treating parenthood like a theater role can help you consciously design the version of yourself you want to show up as without guilt, without losing your sense of self, and yes, while still being a devoted parent.   Join us today as we dive into practical, real-world strategies for surviving (and thriving) in early parenthood. By the end of this episode, you'll understand why maintaining your identity isn't selfish. It's essential modeling for raising children who know their own boundaries and self-respect.   Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://happyfamilyafter.com/73   Want to join the fun and never miss an episode? Subscribe to Happy Family After on your favorite podcast app! Follow us on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/happyfamilyafter/ or visit https://HappyFamilyAfter.com to ask questions, share your thoughts, or even roast your baby (yes, really!).   Need real-life support? Learn more about our in-home postpartum and newborn care services here: https://happyfamilyafter.com/in-home-care/   Send us a DM on Instagram here https://www.instagram.com/happyfamilyafter/ or on my personal Instagram here https://www.instagram.com/delvadean/   Check out Jacqueline's work here https://www.jacqueline-gates.com/

If you're listening to this episode now, it's a little throwback, but the lessons still hit just as hard. I'm revisiting one of my favorite analogies from Parenthood Prep: how having a baby is a lot like going to Burning Man.   Yep, you read that right. At first, it sounds absurd, but hear me out. Both come with mountains of advice (some useful, some ridiculous), and both will leave you questioning why you even signed up… but also laughing, amazed, and totally in awe of the little victories along the way.   In this replay, I share the story of my first Burning Man experience and the unexpected parenting lessons it taught me. From navigating "porta-potties" and zero-hassle survival, to realizing that the real stress isn't the messy parts but the unknowns, this episode is full of insights you can actually use when caring for a newborn. I talk about what you think is going to be hard, what actually is hard, and how to focus on what really matters when everything else feels chaotic.   Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://happyfamilyafter.com/72   Want to join the fun and never miss an episode? Subscribe to Happy Family After on your favorite podcast app! Follow us on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/happyfamilyafter/ or visit https://HappyFamilyAfter.com to ask questions, share your thoughts, or even roast your baby (yes, really!).   Need real-life support? Learn more about our in-home postpartum and newborn care services here: https://happyfamilyafter.com/in-home-care/   Send us a DM on Instagram here https://www.instagram.com/happyfamilyafter/ or on my personal Instagram here https://www.instagram.com/delvadean/

Reflux. Just hearing the word makes parents brace for months of sleepless nights, endless feedings, and a life spent holding your baby upright. It feels like exhaustion is just part of the package. But here's the thing: a lot of the conventional wisdom about reflux is actually making it harder for both you and your baby.   This week, I'm breaking down why reflux doesn't have to derail your baby's sleep, and surprisingly, how better sleep can actually reduce reflux symptoms. And spoiler alert: that "reflux meltdown" might actually be a baby who's overtired, not just uncomfortable.   Join me today as I show you why frequent night snacking creates a cycle of discomfort, how longer stretches of sleep help the digestive system rest, and why fussiness is often overtiredness, not just reflux.   Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://happyfamilyafter.com/71   Want to join the fun and never miss an episode? Subscribe to Happy Family After on your favorite podcast app! Follow us on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/happyfamilyafter/ or visit https://HappyFamilyAfter.com to ask questions, share your thoughts, or even roast your baby (yes, really!).   Need real-life support? Learn more about our in-home postpartum and newborn care services here: https://happyfamilyafter.com/in-home-care/   Send us a DM on Instagram here https://www.instagram.com/happyfamilyafter/ or on my personal Instagram here https://www.instagram.com/delvadean/

Sleep training. It's probably one of the most misunderstood topics in parenting, right? You get bombarded with conflicting advice on when to start, what methods to use, and whether it's even okay to sleep train at all. Parents end up exhausted, waiting months longer than they need to, all because of the myths and confusion surrounding the topic.   This week, I'm here to set the record straight. Tune in as I walk you through what to do at every stage: from the early weeks, when you're just trying to extend time between feeds, all the way through the 4-month mark, when your baby is usually ready for more structured sleep approaches. And, we'll address that whole "anti-sleep training" fear mongering - spoiler alert: no one's suggesting you let your newborn scream it out.   Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://happyfamilyafter.com/70   Want to join the fun and never miss an episode? Subscribe to Happy Family After on your favorite podcast app! Follow us on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/happyfamilyafter/ or visit https://HappyFamilyAfter.com to ask questions, share your thoughts, or even roast your baby (yes, really!).   Need real-life support? Learn more about our in-home postpartum and newborn care services here: https://happyfamilyafter.com/in-home-care/   Send us a DM on Instagram here https://www.instagram.com/happyfamilyafter/ or on my personal Instagram here https://www.instagram.com/delvadean/

Watching your best friends struggle to build a family while sitting on frozen eggs you're not planning to use creates a unique kind of tension.    After spending years in the parenting and family creation world, I've seen it all - surrogacy, adoption, egg donation, and everything in between. But when my friends Dave and Danny casually mentioned their complicated journey to have a biological child during a Zoom call in 2020, the solution hit me like a ton of bricks: those 15 eggs I froze at 37? Not in my future plans, but they could absolutely be part of theirs.   This week's episode is a special one: it's the story of how a spontaneous offer - "Do you want some eggs?" - sparked a three-year journey through contracts, psychological evaluations, FDA testing, and ultimately, the arrival of baby Audrey Joan. From the initial "let's do this" to the emotional rollercoaster it turned into, this episode is all about how egg donation turned into an unexpected gift of life.   Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://happyfamilyafter.com/69   Want to join the fun and never miss an episode? Subscribe to Happy Family After on your favorite podcast app! Follow us on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/happyfamilyafter/ or visit https://HappyFamilyAfter.com to ask questions, share your thoughts, or even roast your baby (yes, really!).   Need real-life support? Learn more about our in-home postpartum and newborn care services here: https://happyfamilyafter.com/in-home-care/   Send us a DM on Instagram here https://www.instagram.com/happyfamilyafter/ or on my personal Instagram here https://www.instagram.com/delvadean/

Nursing parents, I hear you: you're stuck between a rock and a hard place, right? You're told that your baby won't sleep through the night as long as you're breastfeeding. And if you want sleep, you'll have to give up the boob.   Here's the truth: I work with tons of nursing parents - over half of my sleep training clients are breastfeeding - and I never tell them to stop. Your baby can absolutely sleep through the night (yes, even 12 hours!) while keeping your nursing relationship intact. The secret? It's not about whether they're getting formula or breast milk, it's about the behaviors and strategies surrounding feeding.   In this episode, I walk you through simple techniques to help your baby get longer sleep stretches without giving up nursing. From making sure your baby is getting full feeds during the day (especially at bedtime) to avoiding the reflex of nursing at every nighttime wake-up, I'll share exactly what works. We'll talk about things like breast compressions during sleepy feeds, strategic feeding spacing, and when it's time to have another caregiver step in for nighttime soothing.   Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://happyfamilyafter.com/68   Want to join the fun and never miss an episode? Subscribe to Happy Family After on your favorite podcast app! Follow us on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/happyfamilyafter/ or visit https://HappyFamilyAfter.com to ask questions, share your thoughts, or even roast your baby (yes, really!).   Need real-life support? Learn more about our in-home postpartum and newborn care services here: https://happyfamilyafter.com/in-home-care/   Send us a DM on Instagram here https://www.instagram.com/happyfamilyafter/ or on my personal Instagram here https://www.instagram.com/delvadean/  

Hiring a nanny for the first time? Yeah, it can feel like a total whirlwind. There's the logistics: job descriptions, references, contracts, all that jazz. But there's also the emotional part of inviting a stranger into your home to care for your little ones. It's a lot to navigate, and most parents end up stuck somewhere between too low of expectations (can I really ask for someone with experience?) and way too high (wanting someone available 24/7 but only paying for 40 hours a week - yikes).   This week, I'm chatting with Shenandoah Davis from Adventure Nannies about what the hiring process actually looks like and how to set yourself up for success. Shenandoah's got nearly a decade of experience matching nannies with families, so she's dropping all the wisdom on everything from the vetting process to the common mistakes families make when hiring.   Listen in to hear us talk about why paying a living wage is more important than you think, how to figure out if you need a clone of yourself or a complement, and what it's really like having another adult in your house all day. Plus, we dive into the shift toward nanny/family assistant roles, why good nannies get snapped up fast, and how to avoid the trap of undervaluing someone who's taking care of your most precious people.   Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://happyfamilyafter.com/66   Want to join the fun and never miss an episode? Subscribe to Happy Family After on your favorite podcast app! Follow us on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/happyfamilyafter/ or visit https://HappyFamilyAfter.com to ask questions, share your thoughts, or even roast your baby (yes, really!).   Need real-life support? Learn more about our in-home postpartum and newborn care services here: https://happyfamilyafter.com/in-home-care/   Send us a DM on Instagram here https://www.instagram.com/happyfamilyafter/ or on my personal Instagram here https://www.instagram.com/delvadean/   Check out Adventure Nannies here: https://www.adventurenannies.com/

Swaddling your newborn might feel like wrestling a tiny octopus into submission, especially when those little arms keep breaking free at 3AM. Many new parents abandon the practice entirely, convinced their baby "hates" being wrapped up, not realizing they're mistaking the process for the result.   Swaddling recreates the cozy containment babies experienced in the womb, helping them adjust to sleeping on their backs - a position that feels unnatural to them but keeps them safe. When babies spend nine months curled up in a ball and suddenly find themselves flat on their backs with arms and legs free to flail, their startle reflex takes over, waking them repeatedly throughout the night. The right swaddling technique addresses this disconnect between what feels natural to babies and what keeps them safe during sleep.   Join me this week to learn the power of proper swaddling. You'll discover why that "fighting" during the swaddling process doesn't mean your baby hates being swaddled, and learn exactly when and how to transition away from swaddling as your baby grows. Most importantly, you'll gain confidence in creating that snug, womb-like environment that helps newborns feel secure and sleep soundly.   Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://happyfamilyafter.com/66   Want to join the fun and never miss an episode? Subscribe to Happy Family After on your favorite podcast app! Follow us on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/happyfamilyafter/ or visit https://HappyFamilyAfter.com to ask questions, share your thoughts, or even roast your baby (yes, really!).   Need real-life support? Learn more about our in-home postpartum and newborn care services here: https://happyfamilyafter.com/in-home-care/   Send us a DM on Instagram here https://www.instagram.com/happyfamilyafter/ or on my personal Instagram here https://www.instagram.com/delvadean/

Wake windows. If you're a parent, you've probably spent more time thinking about them than is healthy. You set alarms, obsess over exact minutes, and stress about whether you're doing it "right." But here's the deal: wake windows aren't the problem, it's how you're using them.   If you're feeling overwhelmed by the clock, this episode is for you. I'll teach you how to use wake windows as a flexible guide (because, spoiler alert, they're not meant to be a rigid rule). I'll also explain when to ditch the wake windows for a clock schedule and why your baby's circadian rhythm craves consistency, not chaos.   In this episode, I'm breaking down the truth about wake windows and why obsessing over them only makes bedtime harder. Whether you're trying to get your newborn to sleep more or just figuring out when to ditch that third nap, this episode will give you the practical tips to stop fighting your baby's sleep and start working with it.   Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://happyfamilyafter.com/65   Want to join the fun and never miss an episode? Subscribe to Happy Family After on your favorite podcast app! Follow us on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/happyfamilyafter/ or visit https://HappyFamilyAfter.com to ask questions, share your thoughts, or even roast your baby (yes, really!).   Need real-life support? Learn more about our in-home postpartum and newborn care services here: https://happyfamilyafter.com/in-home-care/   Send us a DM on Instagram here https://www.instagram.com/happyfamilyafter/ or on my personal Instagram here https://www.instagram.com/delvadean/

Do you ever look at your toddler's plate and think, "Is this enough food?" Maybe they've had a string cheese stick and some air, and you're wondering if you're slowly raising a future picky eater. Don't panic—when concierge pediatrician Dr. Danis Copenhaver does a breakdown of what toddlers actually eat over a few days, the picture is usually much healthier than we think.   In part two of my conversation with Dr. Danis Copenhaver, we talk about the real deal with toddler eating, safe sleep practices, and building your support system before your baby even arrives. With her experience as a pediatrician and a mom who's been through postpartum mental health challenges herself, Danis brings tons of wisdom to this conversation.    Join us as Danis talks about everything from the myth of constant vitamin supplementation to why toddlers don't need as much food as you think. We also get into some sleep truths and the importance of trusting your baby to figure out their own sleep positions. If you're a new parent (or about to be one), you'll want to hear how to simplify the most stressful parts of parenting—especially when it comes to mealtimes and sleep.   Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://happyfamilyafter.com/64   Want to join the fun and never miss an episode? Subscribe to Happy Family After on your favorite podcast app! Follow us on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/happyfamilyafter/ or visit https://HappyFamilyAfter.com to ask questions, share your thoughts, or even roast your baby (yes, really!).   Need real-life support? Learn more about our in-home postpartum and newborn care services here: https://happyfamilyafter.com/in-home-care/   Send us a DM on Instagram here https://www.instagram.com/happyfamilyafter/ or on my personal Instagram here https://www.instagram.com/delvadean/   Check out Elliston Pediatrics here https://www.ellistonpediatrics.com/ and Dr. Danis Copenhaver here https://www.linkedin.com/in/danis-copenhaver-869591308

Medicine is shifting away from the patient-centered care that once defined the doctor-patient relationship. After a decade of practicing pediatrics in various settings across New York City, Dr. Danis Copenhaver witnessed firsthand how the economics of healthcare consistently undermined quality care. From small mom-and-pop practices to venture capital-funded groups, the pressure to see more patients in less time created a system where neither doctors nor families felt satisfied.   In this conversation with Dr. Copenhaver, I explore how concierge pediatrics offers a modern solution to an age-old problem.    Through our discussion, you'll discover practical insights about newborn care, safety concerns that actually matter, and how having time for real conversations transforms the pediatric experience.    Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://happyfamilyafter.com/63   Want to join the fun and never miss an episode? Subscribe to Happy Family After on your favorite podcast app! Follow us on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/happyfamilyafter/ or visit https://HappyFamilyAfter.com to ask questions, share your thoughts, or even roast your baby (yes, really!).   Enjoying the show? Leave a rating and review to let me know what you think! And you can find instructions on how to do so here: https://happyfamilyafter.com/podcastlaunch   Send us a DM on Instagram here https://www.instagram.com/happyfamilyafter/ or on my personal Instagram here https://www.instagram.com/delvadean/   Check out Elliston Pediatrics here https://www.ellistonpediatrics.com/ and Dr. Danis Copenhaver here https://www.linkedin.com/in/danis-copenhaver-869591308

Ready for a real-life sleep training story? In this episode, I'm walking you through my recent experience with a 4-month-old baby who learned to sleep independently—and yes, it was just as messy and beautiful as it sounds.   This little one had been relying on the Snoo's rocking motion and swaddle to get to sleep, and while the parents were doing a great job putting him down awake, the Snoo was doing all the heavy lifting. In just four days, we took him from needing that motion and a pacifier to rolling over and sleeping through the night.    If you're trying to figure out how to find sleep training success without all the props, this episode is for you. You'll hear the progress he made, and why it was all down to patience, consistency, and giving him the space to figure it out.   Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://happyfamilyafter.com/62   Want to join the fun and never miss an episode? Subscribe to Happy Family After on your favorite podcast app! Follow us on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/happyfamilyafter/ or visit https://HappyFamilyAfter.com to ask questions, share your thoughts, or even roast your baby (yes, really!).   Enjoying the show? Leave a rating and review to let me know what you think! And you can find instructions on how to do so here: https://happyfamilyafter.com/podcastlaunch   Send us a DM on Instagram here https://www.instagram.com/happyfamilyafter/ or on my personal Instagram here https://www.instagram.com/delvadean/

What's the best parenting advice you've ever heard? You know, the tips that actually make life easier instead of more complicated? In this episode, I'm joined by the amazing Margaret Mason Tate for a rootin' tootin' roundup of the best parenting tips from the last year of Parenthood Prep—along with a few new gems that you haven't heard yet   From the "bird method" of baby soothing to not being Ryan Gosling in the middle of the night (trust me, you'll want to hear that one), we're giving you practical advice that actually works. We're also digging into why sometimes doing less is the best thing you can do as a parent and how to stay consistent even when you feel like you're failing.   If you've missed some of our top tips over the past year (or just need a refresher), this episode is packed with actionable advice, some laughs, and a whole lot of parenting wisdom. So buckle up for a good time, because we're about to make this parenting thing just a little bit easier.   Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://happyfamilyafter.com/61   Want to join the fun and never miss an episode? Subscribe to Happy Family After on your favorite podcast app! Follow us on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/happyfamilyafter/ or visit https://HappyFamilyAfter.com to ask questions, share your thoughts, or even roast your baby (yes, really!).   Enjoying the show? Leave a rating and review to let me know what you think! And you can find instructions on how to do so here: https://happyfamilyafter.com/podcastlaunch   Send us a DM on Instagram here https://www.instagram.com/happyfamilyafter/ or on my personal Instagram here https://www.instagram.com/delvadean/   Follow Margaret on Instagram here https://www.instagram.com/margaretmasontate/ or on Threads here https://www.threads.net/@margaretmasontate