Celebration isn’t extra; it’s essential. We unpack why so many of us learned to shrink our joy—thanks to stay-humble conditioning, perfectionist rules, and a lingering pandemic hangover—and how that habit quietly steals motivation, confidence, and connection. If you’ve ever skipped your own wins, mumbled through a birthday, or dreaded New Year’s because of the pressure to perform, this conversation hands you the tools to rewrite your ritual. We dig into the psychology behind downplaying succ...
Ever felt your mouth say yes while your gut screams no? We’re digging into why confrontation feels like danger to your nervous system, how people-pleasing sneaks in through well-meaning “niceness,” and the simple shifts that turn boundary-setting into an act of self-respect. With plain language and a little humor, we unpack the brain science behind fear, show you how the amygdala hijack works, and explain why your prefrontal cortex is your ally when you speak up—even if your hands shake. You...
Let's play a little game of "WHAT IF?" What if your nervous system isn’t scared of compliments because you’re ungrateful, but because it learned that safety lives in overgiving? In this episode we get real about why receiving feels awkward for people pleasers and breaks down how to flip the script with warmth, humour, and brain-savvy tools you can use today. Cuz why wait for good things to happen? We want it NOW! We start by untangling worthiness from performance. If childhood taught y...
Ever felt like you’re standing in a hallway between who you were and who you’re becoming? That’s the messy middle—and it’s where real change happens. We get honest about why transformation feels scary, why your brain clings to familiar patterns, and how to move from people pleasing and performance to alignment, peace, and personal power. We start by decoding the science: the brain rewards predictability, not happiness. That’s why boundaries feel threatening and old roles feel safer than they...
We unpack why waiting to be chosen keeps us small and how choosing ourselves rewires beliefs, focuses the brain, and attracts aligned opportunities. Steph shares a personal story of grief, self-promotion, and practical tools to define, claim, and live your worth. • approval loops and how beliefs form • dangers of outsourcing power and validation • letting go of apologies, fear and old stories • defining clear desires and non-negotiables • identity-led action and aligned standards • RAS, self...
We trace how tiny moments of self-abandonment scatter your spark, then map a science-backed path to call it home. Quiet power replaces people pleasing through five practical steps, somatic anchors, and small choices that rebuild trust in yourself. • micro moments that teach the brain to shrink • rejection and shame as felt threats not facts • survival mode turning into self-abandonment • the kitchen floor clarity and choosing yourself • manager codes and neural pathways for change • the puzz...
Ever order the sushi to keep the peace when all you wanted was the burger? That tiny moment says everything about approval addiction—how our brains chase praise like a survival resource and how that chase slowly shrinks our lives. We unpack why the dopamine loop makes people-pleasing feel like oxygen, then show how to break it with simple, believable steps that rebuild confidence from the inside out. We start with clear, relatable stories that highlight the hidden costs of the “easy yes”—exh...
A simple question can shake an entire life: What do I really want? Not what looks impressive, not what keeps the peace—what actually lights you up. We dive into why that question triggers the body’s alarm bells, how self‑silencing gets wired in, and what it takes to reclaim autonomy without blowing everything up. From the lens of neuroscience and self‑determination theory, we unpack why familiar patterns feel safe, why uncertainty reads as danger, and how to retrain your sys...
What happens when the name tags come off? We dive straight into the sticky truth: roles like “busy mom,” “rock star employee,” or “supportive spouse” can earn praise and belonging, but they can also erase the person underneath. With humour, candour, and a little sass, we unpack how people-pleasing and external validation rent your worth—and how to take it back without burning your past to the ground. We explore why labels feel safe (and why safety isn’t satisfaction), how communi...
Stop chasing the polished reveal and step into the part no one posts: the messy middle. We go straight at the awkward, foggy, sometimes tear-streaked stretch between “before” and “after,” and show why it’s the most creative, honest stage of becoming. Steph shares a raw closet moment—when a wardrobe full of other people’s expectations sparked a rebellion in the form of a bright orange top—and connects it to a bigger truth: those uncomfortable realizations are data, not drama. From playlists st...
Imagine waking up each morning with $1,000 worth of energy to spend. By noon, you're broke—and somehow, none of it went toward what truly matters to you. Sound familiar? In this eye-opening episode, we dive deep into the concept of your "energy budget" and how recovering people pleasers unconsciously bankrupt themselves by saying yes to everyone else's priorities. I'll show you exactly how hustle culture has conditioned us to measure our worth by productivity, leaving us exhausted, resentful...
When did "busy" become your brand? That exhausted, overwhelmed state we wear like a badge of honor isn't the flex we think it is. In this eye-opening episode, we unpack the uncomfortable truth about our addiction to busyness and why it might be the cheapest status symbol you're carrying. Busy isn't who you are—it's just what you're doing. As people-pleasers, we've mistaken productivity for self-worth, convincing ourselves that if we're not constantly available and helpful, we're somehow less...
That queasy feeling after setting a boundary isn't your conscience—it's your breakthrough. For recovering people-pleasers, the "guilt hangover" arrives like clockwork after we finally stand up for ourselves, bringing with it anxiety, second-guessing, and that unmistakable pit in our stomach. But what if this discomfort isn't a warning sign at all? What if it's actually evidence that you're finally breaking free from patterns that have kept you small? Throughout this episode, we dive deep int...
Ever caught yourself holding back—not because you didn't want to do something, but because it felt too awkward? That gut-wrenching sensation isn't actually warning you of danger—it's signaling growth. Awkwardness is the toll we pay to step into our next chapter. For recovering people-pleasers especially, that discomfort feels catastrophic because it represents the death of our familiar, safe selves. But what if that cringe-worthy feeling is actually the doorway to the authentic life you've b...
Ever felt that strange disorientation that comes with personal growth? That moment when you've done the work, made the changes, but suddenly feel like you're wearing someone else's skin? Don't worry—you haven't taken a wrong turn. That wobbly feeling is actually confirmation you're exactly where you need to be. Breaking up with your old identity is a profound journey that few people talk about. After years of performing roles that kept you safe but small—the people-pleaser, the overachiever,...
Keeping promises to others comes naturally to most of us—but what about the commitments we make to ourselves? That daily meditation practice, the exercise routine, the boundaries we swear we'll enforce... somehow these often become negotiable when life gets hectic. The truth? Every time you break a promise to yourself, you're quietly eroding your self-trust. Just as reliability builds trust in relationships with others, showing up for yourself consistently creates the foundation for unshakab...
Ever wonder why the most exhilarating moments of your life happened outside your comfort zone? That's no coincidence. Your comfort zone is like that friend who only wants to hang out in sweatpants watching reruns – cozy, yes, but hardly where life's magic unfolds. We're diving deep into the neuroscience behind why our brains crave predictability (hello, amygdala) and how that evolutionary advantage can become a modern-day limitation when we let it shrink our world without even realizing it. ...
Ever find yourself saying yes when every cell in your body is screaming no? That moment—when your gut says one thing but your mouth betrays you—is exactly where your power leaks away. As recovering people-pleasers, we've mastered the art of negotiating our non-negotiables to keep everyone happy, everyone except ourselves. What if your exhaustion, resentment, and that fantasy about escaping to a remote island with some goats isn't actually random? It's the direct result of repeatedly compromi...
Have you ever caught yourself shrinking to keep the peace? Bite your tongue when your gut is screaming otherwise? Maybe you've been told to tone down your shine or smooth out your edges. That stops now. This episode is your permission slip to blow the walls out of that tiny box you were never meant to fit in. I'm sharing my own turning point – standing in my kitchen, paralyzed with anxiety over cleaning a tea infuser, when my higher self essentially said, "Oh hell no, we did not come here fo...
Ready to break free from the people-pleasing habit that's draining your energy and peace? Let's tackle the compulsion to justify every decision, boundary, and "no" in your life. Have you ever declined an invitation only to immediately launch into a detailed explanation worthy of a PowerPoint presentation? That's not politeness—it's people-pleasing in a power suit. Through personal stories and practical insights, we unpack the invisible contract many of us signed promising to justify our exis...