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Pulling The Thread with Elise Loehnen
Pulling The Thread with Elise LoehnenSubscribed: 1,056Played: 32,047
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© 2025 Elise Loehnen
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Writer Elise Loehnen explores life’s big questions with today’s leading thinkers, experts, and luminaries: Why do we do what we do? How can we understand and love ourselves better? What would it look like to come together and build a more meaningful world?
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257 Episodes
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“We’re in a time of masking and masks, whether we know it or not,” says psychotherapist Satya Doyle Byock. “And my hope is that us talking about it draws that into greater consciousness for people to make decisions about when to put them on and when to take them off.” Today, we’re talking about persona, in the sense of the masks we wear for various reasons (some beneficial, some nefarious). And, how, in becoming attached to the idea of authenticity and being in a rush to identify someone else or ourselves as inauthentic—we can really miss our mark. For the show notes, including sign-up links to the events that Satya and I will be doing together, head to my Substack.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
“I believe basically what I’ve seen in the laboratory,” says scientist Dean Radin, PhD. “I'm driven by experience just like anybody else, except my experience is experiment.” Radin studies things like telepathy, consciousness, quantum physics, and more parapsychology. He shares some of the most fascinating discoveries from his lab, broader research, and new book The Science of Magic. Such as, how the present can be influenced by the future. For the show notes and links (including that Jeffrey Kripal story that I share after today’s conversation), head over to my Substack.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
In my one episode sans guest this month, I’m reflecting on: how we might enjoy solitude more (and fear loneliness less), the manifestation program I just finished (called the Money Challenge), how I’m feeling about attention and power these days, and a couple of other micro and macro realizations that are surfacing right now. For the show notes, head over to my Substack.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
“There are so many blessings in the in-between,” says Jessica Gill, chief content officer at To Be Magnetic and cohost of the Expanded podcast with Lacy Phillips. “You can manifest amazing mini manifestations or just kismet opportunities or these things that you wouldn't even believe would transpire in the midst of doing this work.” Today, Gill breaks down the deeply intuitive—and simple, but not easy—manifestation process that is the core of To Be Magnetic and the new book How to Manifest. This has changed the way I think about manifestation, the purpose of it, and the potential it has to help us outgrow old dynamics and evolve with new ones. For the show notes, head to my Substack.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Social psychologist Carol Tavris, PhD, breaks down cognitive dissonance, why it’s so hard for us to see our own blind spots, the power and danger of self-justification, and the pyramid of choice that can lead us to some unexpected places. She also shares some fascinating findings about anger and catharsis that turn a few assumptions on their head. In doing so, she helps us understand our own behaviors and motives better—and she helps us to see others more clearly. For the show notes, head over to my Substack.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Longtime sex-advice columnist and author Dan Savage shares how he thinks about monogamy, marriage, infidelity, and repair. We explore how sex and relationships get conflated. We get into identities, orientations, preferences, language, and how we’re raising kids today. Also, Savage’s take on heteropessimism, what makes a man an attractive partner, and a word he introduced me to: tolyamory, meaning tolerating your lover’s BS. There’s so much to unpack in here, and to keep thinking about. For the show notes, head to my Substack.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
“We have to let go of our own patriarchy,” says Elinor Dickson. “And we’re afraid to because it represents control for us.” Dickson spent more than 35 years as a Jungian therapist, and she cowrote the seminal Dancing in the Flames with her good friend Marion Woodman. She’s one of the wise elders of our time. We explore the new universal mythos our culture so badly needs, Dickson’s fascinating historical perspective (including how our modern world is largely shaped by the Great Plague), and why neither a matriarchy or a patriarchy is right for us. Dickson also shares where she sees shoots of hope, and one wild story of synchronicity. For the show notes, head to my Substack.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
In this month’s solo episode, I’m exploring the parts of our culture and our collective that we can own—and impact. And I’m sharing more on the power of triangulation, and how you can use certain systems and tools to better understand yourself, your roles, and what you might be trying to do in work and in life. For ALL the show notes, head over to my Substack.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
The hilarious Jen Hatmaker (New York Times–bestselling author and host of the podcast For the Love) joins me to chat, in part, about her new memoir Awake. We talk about the moment in her life when everything seemingly dissolved (including her marriage of 26 years and her relationship to the church) and the much deeper awakening that she entered from there, when she truly started to rely on herself. For the show notes, head to my Substack.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Katie Hendricks, PhD, is known for helping people use their body’s innate intelligence. She shares some of her most powerful tools and teachings, including: Her fear-melters for when we get caught in fight, flee, freeze, or faint mode. How to play with your pace so that you’re able to get present, instead of just feeling at the effect of everything coming at you. The loop of awareness, which is a tool for shifting your attention and getting the nourishment of somebody else’s aliveness. Why she sorts life into two files every day. How to incrementally start spending more time in your zone of genius. And persona work. These are potent (and often fun) ways to, as Hendrick puts it, be filling your reservoir so that you don’t have to feel victim to overwhelm, or sacrifice yourself to the world. I’m including a lot in the show notes, including links to the movements for each fear-melter. You’ll find everything on my Substack.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
“I don't think anybody manages to go through their experience incarnated in human form and not have chapters of your life that are like, what literally just happened?” says Elizabeth Gilbert. “How did I end up here and who am I? And where did the ground go beneath my feet?” Today, Gilbert shares the story behind her new memoir, All the Way to the River: Love, Loss, and Liberation. She rightly describes it as the most excavating and the most searching thing she’s ever written. The book, and this conversation, are full of lessons for all of us about what we might search for, and find, in ourselves, in our relationships, and in love. For the show notes, head over to my Substack.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
“This waiting for approval from daddy—all of that is so antithetical to actually living your own existence,” says psychotherapist Satya Doyle Byock. Today, Byock returns for a conversation about the ego, why it gets a bad rap, and why we need a strong sense of self to be in relationship with anyone. Also: our culture’s ascension myth, and why we have a tendency to misinterpret Jungian psychology and overemphasize the importance of individuation and the drive to transcend. Then, Byock shares something poignant about how life, for her, stays beautiful and bountiful, even in the extreme difficulty of things. For the show notes (including links to my previous conversations with Satya Doyle Byock and our I Ching video workshop), head over to my Substack.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
“What does it mean to make change in my life—not from a place that there was something wrong with me?” asks my coauthor Courtney Smith. “But I made choices that have gotten me here. I respect and value those choices. I understand I wouldn’t be here without them. And I'm also choosing to do something a little bit different going forward.” Courtney is a coach, group facilitator, and Enneagram expert. Today, we’re taking you through the seven tools that form the core process of our new workbook Choosing Wholeness Over Goodness: A Process for Reclaiming Your Full Self. If you want to go deeper, I’m including a lot of interconnected material in the show notes (per usual, though)—including links to my past conversations with Courtney.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Today it’s just me, sharing a few revelations I’ve had this summer around: The set ages we seemingly get stuck at. Emotions I’m connecting to for the first time in my life (and how certain codes of anger have helped me). How busyness impacts our physical patterns and the way we hold our bodies, or clench our weight. And practicing rejection and building our capacity to hear no, while simultaneously building our capacity to say no. (In this month’s solo episode, I also get into some life-altering experiences I’ve had with different healers, and the new list I compiled of my favorite healers.) For the show notes, links to all the resources I mention in the episode, and my new workbook Choosing Wholeness Over Goodness—head over to my Substack.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
“We’re not empty containers just being filled up with fear and terror and trauma,” says psychotherapist Francis Weller. “We’re also medicine carriers.” Many of you will know Weller from his moving conversations about grief with Anderson Cooper, or his beautiful book The Wild of Edge of Sorrow. Weller’s new book, In the Absence of Ordinary, is exactly what we need now. Today, we talk about the wisdom and vitality that our grief can bring forth if we resist the impulse to go numb. Weller talks about what happens when we keep our grief company, when we allow it to keep moving, when we give ourselves what we’ve so been needing. He invites us, in this time of uncertainty, to move toward imagination, and what he calls the long dark—a space where we can connect with our own immensity, and collectively receive the medicine that is waiting there for all of us. For the show notes (including links to the new edition of The Wild Edge of Sorrow and In the Absence of Ordinary, which was just released), head over to my Substack.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
“If we stop transforming, and we try to hold ourselves back, we’re effectively stagnating and killing the life that’s ahead,” says psychologist and author Sharon Blackie, PhD. Today, we talk about what Blackie has learned from studying myths and fairy tales, and working to reimagine the stories that currently define women’s lives. She shares a much-needed, wise, and beautiful perspective on the rebirth that can happen around menopause—when the layers that once defined us are peeled back, to reveal a deeper core, and a chance to transform once more. For the show notes, head over to my Substack.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
“We can’t change what’s happened, but we can change what it looks like inside of our mind-brain-body network,” says neuroscientist Caroline Leaf, PhD. Here, Leaf shares what she’s learned about how our minds work, and how we can change a thought, a habit, a pattern. And we get into the compelling 63-second intervention from her new book, Help in a Hurry: Simple Tips for Finding Peace When You're Overwhelmed, Anxious, or Stressed. For the show notes, head over to my Substack.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Thomas Hübl (a frequent guest here) is a renowned teacher whose work has focused on resilience and healing trauma. In this conversation, we explore: Some of our biggest fractured interpretations of the world, and how we can gain more clarity and connection. The impulse to become very certain about something very quickly, and our tendency to see other people in 2D—and the consequences of doing so. Using our own energy to temper, or shift, a larger energy that feels overwhelming. Different ways to approach conflict. Letting go of our commitment to having the most extreme reaction. And some of our judgments around wellness and self-care. For the show notes, more on Thomas Hübl, and links to all our previous conversations together, head over to my Substack.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
In this month’s solo episode, I’m sharing some thoughts on why everyone seems to want a book under their belt, why that may or may not be the right move for you, as well as concrete tips and takeaways about what to think through before you begin putting words on paper. Most importantly, I share some tips and frameworks for getting you through the creative process once you begin. For the show notes (and so many links if you want to go deeper), head over to my Substack.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
1Today, I’m talking to Meggan Watterson—theologian and author of The Girl Who Baptized Herself—about the importance of being embodied, the search for self, where we derive power, and the way that culture is edited and passed down to us. Watterson tells the incredible stories behind the Gospel of Mary (and what happened to Mary Magdalene), and the Acts of Paul and Thecla (and what happened to Thecla). We also explore where my work meets hers, and the birth of the seven powers, which become the seven cardinal vices, or the seven deadly sins. For the show notes, head over to my Substack. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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This reflective solo episode beautifully navigates themes of trust, timing, and the unknown—something many of us face in both personal journeys and professional settings. https://lrchauffeurs.com/ is a premium chauffeur service based in London, offering luxury transport solutions across the UK, and much like the clarity and support you seek from tarot or workshops, their service offers peace of mind, reliability, and a smooth journey even when life feels uncertain. Ask ChatGPT
books published as Kathlyn Hendricks. think Kendricks is a typo
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sorry. Your guest lost me at saying understanding your chart means realizing there's cosmic reasons and it wasn't your parents. My childhood trauma says otherwise. I can heal and forgive them for other reasons. I can see people with compassion and not judge for other reasons. and it isn't some external influence of the heavens or. God or whatever. External reasons are crutches. It's too easy for people to say it's my chart is and never do the real internal work to grow. We grow from within because of how we deal with all the inputs to our various senses (including the senses science is just beginning to understand). We don't grow if we end up in limited thinking due to astrology or religion.
This episode was so impactful. Thank you once again for your vulnerability Elise. You are an expert at it 😊😘