Pure Victory Podcast

Welcome to episode #283! 🎙️ Pure Victory Podcast: Is Porn Use Always Linked to Trauma? Is porn addiction always rooted in trauma? Not necessarily.Porn can begin with curiosity, accidental exposure, or simply having easy access to something highly stimulating. But over time, it can become something we use to escape stress, loneliness, disappointment, rejection, or other difficult emotions.In this episode, we look at the difference between trauma being the cause of our porn use and porn becoming a coping mechanism for pain. We also explore what happens when we stop hiding and start asking honest questions about what’s really going on beneath the surface.Freedom isn’t just about running away from porn—it’s about learning to run toward something better.Key TakeawaysYou don't have to have experienced trauma to develop a struggle with porn.Porn can become a coping mechanism for difficult emotions and life circumstances.Temporary relief isn't the same as healing.Asking “What am I trying not to feel right now?” can reveal important patterns.Hiding creates distance from God, others, and even ourselves.Bringing what we're experiencing into the light is an important part of freedom.Your story may contain pain or trauma, but it doesn't have to define your future.True freedom is about more than stopping a behavior—it's about learning to live differently and moving toward Jesus.Scriptural HighlightGenesis 3:9 — “Where are you?”God already knew where Adam and Eve were, but His question invited them out of hiding and into honesty.Sometimes we need to ask ourselves the same question:Where am I emotionally? Where am I spiritually? What am I hiding?Action StepsLook at what happens before the behavior. What were you feeling or experiencing right before you turned to porn?Ask the deeper question: “What am I trying not to feel right now?”Name the pattern without shame. Understanding your triggers isn't about beating yourself up—it's about becoming aware.Bring it into the light. Talk to God and, when appropriate, a trusted person, spouse, mentor, or counsellor.Run toward something better. Don't just focus on getting away from porn; focus on growing in connection with God, others, and yourself.🎧 Subscribe to the Pure Victory Podcast!💙 Want to help others find freedom? Visit PureVictoryPodcast.com to support the mission.You are not alone—and freedom is possible.Ask a questionHave a question you'd like answered live on an episode? Send a voice recording of your question to [email protected] this with your friendsWho do you know that can benefit from this podcast and other episodes coming in the future? Share it with them so they can subscribe as well.SubscribeSubscribe on any podcast app to make sure you catch new episodes! ResourcesFamilyLife Canada: Porn Recovery ResourcesFamilyLife Canada: Resources and events to strengthen your marriageOnline marriage resources (FamilyLife Canada)Covenant Eyes Accountability Software - use promo code FLCANADA for 30 days freePure Freedom Community for men 18+Book a FREE call (men)Pure Freedom Journey for men and womenPodcast HostBRADEN HAFNERBraden is the Regional Director in Alberta for FamilyLife Canada. He and his wife Kristen live in Edmonton, Alberta. He knows all too well the destruction that porn use and addiction can have, and now wants to see people experience freedom away from porn. Along with that he is passionate about seeing marriages grow and thrive, and helping couples move to a deeper oneness with one another and with God. FamilyLife Canada has a variety of resources and events to help you and your spouse take your marriage to the next level. See what would benefit you at www.familylifecanada.com

Welcome to episode #282! When Both Spouses Have a Story: Finding Hope After Sexual Brokenness With RJ and Melissa WhaleyWhat happens when both spouses bring sexual brokenness into a marriage? RJ and Melissa Whaley join us to share their incredibly honest story of pornography, betrayal, recovery, rebuilding trust, and discovering that God can use even the hardest parts of our story for His glory.Their journey is a powerful reminder that recovery isn't simply about stopping a behavior. It's about learning to become healthier people, rebuilding connection, taking responsibility for our own choices, and creating a new path for our marriages and families.Most importantly, your story doesn't have to end where your struggle began.Key TakeawaysMarriage doesn't automatically fix sexual brokenness—healing requires intentional work.Your pain matters, but you are also responsible for how you respond to it.Recovery isn't just about sobriety; it's about rebuilding the relationship.Trust is rebuilt through honesty, consistency, and actions that match our words.Look for the small wins—or "glimmers"—that show you are moving in a healthier direction.You can't change your spouse, but you can change how you show up.You don't have to walk this journey alone. Authentic community can make all the difference.Scripture Highlight“Choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve.” — Joshua 24:15We have a choice in how we respond, how we show up, and what direction we take. We may not be able to control everything around us, but we can choose the next right step.Action StepsTake responsibility for your yard. Ask: What is mine to own in this situation?Look for a glimmer. Identify one area where you or your relationship is doing better than before.Choose one small change. Don't try to fix everything at once. What is one healthy step you can consistently take this week?Find community. Don't keep sexual struggles, pain, or recovery isolated. Find someone safe who can walk with you.Remember: You don't have to change perfectly. You just have to keep choosing differently—and keep moving toward Jesus.Connect to the Whaley's:Instagram: The Trail Blazing LifeRJ and Melissa's Website🎧 Subscribe to the Pure Victory Podcast!💙 Want to help others find freedom? Visit PureVictoryPodcast.com to support the mission.You are not alone—and freedom is possible.Ask a questionHave a question you'd like answered live on an episode? Send a voice recording of your question to [email protected] this with your friendsWho do you know that can benefit from this podcast and other episodes coming in the future? Share it with them so they can subscribe as well.SubscribeSubscribe on any podcast app to make sure you catch new episodes! ResourcesFamilyLife Canada: Porn Recovery ResourcesFamilyLife Canada: Resources and events to strengthen your marriageOnline marriage resources (FamilyLife Canada)Covenant Eyes Accountability Software - use promo code FLCANADA for 30 days freePure Freedom Community for men 18+Book a FREE call (men)Pure Freedom Journey for men and womenPodcast HostBRADEN HAFNERBraden is the Regional Director in Alberta for FamilyLife Canada. He and his wife Kristen live in Edmonton, Alberta. He knows all too well the destruction that porn use and addiction can have, and now wants to see people experience freedom away from porn. Along with that he is passionate about seeing marriages grow and thrive, and helping couples move to a deeper oneness with one another and with God. FamilyLife Canada has a variety of resources and events to help you and your spouse take your marriage to the next level. See what would benefit you at www.familylifecanada.com

Welcome to episode #281! 🎙️ Pure Victory Podcast: The Battlefield Has Changed: Are You Prepared?The landscape of pornography has changed dramatically. What once required a magazine or a computer can now be accessed instantly—and emerging technologies like AI are making pornography increasingly personalized, interactive, and harder to recognize for what it really is.But awareness isn’t meant to create fear. It’s meant to prepare us.In this episode, Braden looks at how the “battlefield” has shifted and why understanding what we’re up against matters if we want to walk in freedom. More importantly, we’re reminded that while the world around us may be changing, God hasn’t changed—and His power is greater than anything coming our way.Key TakeawaysThe pornography landscape is constantly evolving, and awareness helps us prepare rather than panic.AI and personalized, interactive content create new challenges that can blur the lines between fantasy, relationships, and reality.Pornography doesn’t just affect what we see—it can shape what we believe about sex, intimacy, relationships, and ourselves.We need more than “don’t look at porn.” We need to be discipled in what is true, good, noble, and healthy.Freedom grows through honesty, community, awareness, and a deeper relationship with Jesus.The battlefield may be changing, but God is bigger than the battle.📖 Scriptural Highlight“Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.” — 1 Peter 5:8Being alert doesn’t mean living in fear. It means knowing what we’re facing, staying awake, and trusting God as we walk forward.This Week’s Action StepsTake inventory: Are there new technologies, apps, or habits pulling you closer to pornography?Get honest: Talk with a trusted, godly person about what you’re actually battling.Replace the lie: Ask yourself, What is pornography teaching me about sex and intimacy—and what does God say instead?Stay awake: Don’t become obsessed with the darkness, but don’t be unaware of it either.Lean into Jesus: Freedom isn’t ultimately found in better strategies—it’s found in becoming more deeply rooted in Christ.🎧 Subscribe to the Pure Victory Podcast!💙 Want to help others find freedom? Visit PureVictoryPodcast.com to support the mission.You are not alone—and freedom is possible.Ask a questionHave a question you'd like answered live on an episode? Send a voice recording of your question to [email protected] this with your friendsWho do you know that can benefit from this podcast and other episodes coming in the future? Share it with them so they can subscribe as well.SubscribeSubscribe on any podcast app to make sure you catch new episodes! ResourcesFamilyLife Canada: Porn Recovery ResourcesFamilyLife Canada: Resources and events to strengthen your marriageOnline marriage resources (FamilyLife Canada)Covenant Eyes Accountability Software - use promo code FLCANADA for 30 days freePure Freedom Community for men 18+Book a FREE call (men)Pure Freedom Journey for men and womenPodcast HostBRADEN HAFNERBraden is the Regional Director in Alberta for FamilyLife Canada. He and his wife Kristen live in Edmonton, Alberta. He knows all too well the destruction that porn use and addiction can have, and now wants to see people experience freedom away from porn. Along with that he is passionate about seeing marriages grow and thrive, and helping couples move to a deeper oneness with one another and with God. FamilyLife Canada has a variety of resources and events to help you and your spouse take your marriage to the next level. See what would benefit you at www.familylifecanada.com

Welcome to episode #280! When Your Body Is Trying to Tell You Something with Dr.Dave JanvierWhat if the urge to look at porn isn’t always about sex?In this episode, we sit down with Dr. Dave Janvier, a clinical counselor and certified sex therapist, to explore embodiment—learning to recognize what’s happening inside our bodies, emotions, and nervous systems.Dave explains why simply trying to “think” our way out of addiction often isn’t enough. Sometimes the craving we experience is pointing to something deeper: loneliness, stress, grief, disconnection, or an unmet need for relationship and connection.Rather than running from uncomfortable feelings, we can learn to slow down, notice what’s happening in our bodies, and respond with wisdom instead of automatically reaching for an escape.And perhaps most importantly, we discover how this connects with our relationship with God. God doesn't just want us to know about Him—He wants us to experience His presence, love, grace, and acceptance.Key TakeawaysAwareness creates space for choice. Learning to recognize physical sensations and emotions earlier can help us respond before we're overwhelmed.Porn can be a symptom, not the root. Sexual urges may sometimes mask deeper needs such as loneliness, grief, stress, or a desire for connection.You can't heal what you continually avoid. Instead of immediately numbing uncomfortable emotions, learn to notice them and sit with them in a grounded way.Our bodies matter. God created us as whole people—body, mind, emotions, relationships, and spirit.God is present in the struggle. Sexual brokenness doesn't mean we have to hide from God. His presence meets us with compassion, grace, and truth.Scriptural Highlight“For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses...” — Hebrews 4:15Jesus understands what it means to live in a human body, experience emotion, face temptation, and experience suffering. We don't have to hide the difficult parts of ourselves from Him.This Week's Action StepsPause and check in. A few times throughout the day, stop and ask: What am I noticing in my body right now? What am I feeling?Don't immediately escape the feeling. When a craving or difficult emotion shows up, slow down and breathe before deciding what to do.Ask what's underneath. When you experience an urge to act out, ask: What am I really longing for right now? Connection? Comfort? Rest? Acceptance?Bring it to God. Instead of hiding when you're struggling, practice noticing God's presence with you right in the middle of it.Practice before the battle. Build these awareness and grounding skills when you're calm—not just when you're already triggered.Freedom isn't simply learning how to stop a behavior. Sometimes it's learning to understand what that behavior has been trying to tell you.🎧 Subscribe to the Pure Victory Podcast!💙 Want to help others find freedom? Visit PureVictoryPodcast.com to support the mission.You are not alone—and freedom is possible.Ask a questionHave a question you'd like answered live on an episode? Send a voice recording of your question to [email protected] this with your friendsWho do you know that can benefit from this podcast and other episodes coming in the future? Share it with them so they can subscribe as well.SubscribeSubscribe on any podcast app to make sure you catch new episodes! ResourcesFamilyLife Canada: Porn Recovery ResourcesFamilyLife Canada: Resources and events to strengthen your marriageOnline marriage resources (FamilyLife Canada)Covenant Eyes Accountability Software - use promo code FLCANADA for 30 days freePure Freedom Community for men 18+Book a FREE call (men)Pure Freedom Journey for men and womenPodcast HostBRADEN HAFNERBraden is the Regional Director in Alberta for FamilyLife Canada. He and his wife Kristen live in Edmonton, Alberta. He knows all too well the destruction that porn use and addiction can have, and now wants to see people experience freedom away from porn. Along with that he is passionate about seeing marriages grow and thrive, and helping couples move to a deeper oneness with one another and with God. FamilyLife Canada has a variety of resources and events to help you and your spouse take your marriage to the next level. See what would benefit you at www.familylifecanada.com

Welcome to episode #279! 🎙️ Pure Victory Podcast: Myth Busters: 3 Myths That Keep People Stuck in PornWhat if some of the biggest obstacles to freedom aren't pornography itself—but the lies we've come to believe about it?In this episode of the Pure Victory Podcast, Braden unpacks three common myths revealed in a recent survey from Beyond the Porn Phenomenon. Backed by Scripture, recovery experience, and practical insight, he exposes why these beliefs keep people trapped and points listeners toward the freedom and healing Jesus offers.Freedom doesn't begin with trying harder—it begins with believing what's true.Key TakeawaysWillpower alone won't defeat porn. Healing happens in the context of honesty, confession, and community—not isolation.Porn and sexual health cannot coexist. Porn rewires the brain, distorts God's design for intimacy, and leaves lasting relational damage.Porn doesn't improve your sex life—it undermines it. Healthy intimacy is built on trust, sacrifice, and covenant, not fantasy and consumption.Sobriety isn't the finish line. True freedom comes when God heals the deeper wounds beneath unwanted sexual behaviour.Scripture HighlightJames 5:16"Therefore confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed."Forgiveness comes through Christ, but healing often begins when we step out of secrecy and into authentic community.Action StepsAsk yourself: Which of these myths have I believed?Share your struggle with one trusted, safe person instead of continuing to fight alone.Spend time asking God to reveal the deeper hurts or unmet needs that pornography has been covering over.Take one intentional step this week toward healing—not just sobriety.Freedom starts when lies are exposed and truth takes their place. Jesus isn't simply calling you away from pornography—He's inviting you into real intimacy, real freedom, and real healing.🎧 Subscribe to the Pure Victory Podcast!💙 Want to help others find freedom? Visit PureVictoryPodcast.com to support the mission.You are not alone—and freedom is possible.Ask a questionHave a question you'd like answered live on an episode? Send a voice recording of your question to [email protected] this with your friendsWho do you know that can benefit from this podcast and other episodes coming in the future? Share it with them so they can subscribe as well.SubscribeSubscribe on any podcast app to make sure you catch new episodes! ResourcesFamilyLife Canada: Porn Recovery ResourcesFamilyLife Canada: Resources and events to strengthen your marriageOnline marriage resources (FamilyLife Canada)Covenant Eyes Accountability Software - use promo code FLCANADA for 30 days freePure Freedom Community for men 18+Book a FREE call (men)Pure Freedom Journey for men and womenPodcast HostBRADEN HAFNERBraden is the Regional Director in Alberta for FamilyLife Canada. He and his wife Kristen live in Edmonton, Alberta. He knows all too well the destruction that porn use and addiction can have, and now wants to see people experience freedom away from porn. Along with that he is passionate about seeing marriages grow and thrive, and helping couples move to a deeper oneness with one another and with God. FamilyLife Canada has a variety of resources and events to help you and your spouse take your marriage to the next level. See what would benefit you at www.familylifecanada.com