In this episode of Queer Talker, host Ben Cicchetti sits down with drag performer, community builder, and cultural force Jessica L’Whor, also known as Miss Jessica, to explore drag as identity, resistance, and care.Jessica reflects on growing up in a deeply sheltered Catholic household, navigating queerness through religious guilt, and the long journey toward self acceptance. She speaks openly about coming out later in life, unlearning shame, and what it took to finally embrace who she is today.From her beginnings in the Denver drag scene to becoming a full time performer for over a decade, Jessica shares the realities of sustaining a creative career without television backing, the business discipline behind longevity, and why consistency matters more than viral moments.The conversation also dives into the creation of Miss Jessica, her all ages and family friendly drag persona. Jessica explains why visibility for queer youth is vital, how drag story times and school visits became part of her mission, and what it means to create safe, affirming spaces for children and families in a climate where drag is increasingly politicised.Ben and Jessica discuss chosen family, queer elders, touring across the United States, and the responsibility that comes with having a large platform. Jessica is candid about balancing joy and escapism with activism, and why being a soft, visible presence can be just as powerful as outrage.This is a conversation about drag as art, drag as care, and the importance of being the person you needed when you were younger.Chapters00:00 Queer Panic Rapid Fire Questions06:36 Childhood and Early Influences11:42 Understanding Queerness and Family Dynamics16:25 The State of Drag and LGBTQ+ Community20:49 Jessica's Journey into Drag21:31 Longevity in Drag Performance and Community Support23:19 Empowering the Next Generation of Drag Artists25:55 Creating Family-Friendly Drag Experiences28:24 The Role of Visibility and Representation30:55 Building an Authentic Online Presence34:10 The Intersection of Art and Activism37:21 Advice for the Younger GenerationConnect with Jessica L’Whor:Website - https://www.jessicalwhor.comInstagram - https://www.instagram.com/jessicalwhor/TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@jessicalwhorConnect with Ben Cicchetti:Website - https://www.queertalker.com Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchettiTikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchetti
In this episode of Queer Talker, host Ben Cicchetti sits down with comedian Mark Bittlestone whose sharp wit, queer storytelling and emotional honesty have made him one of the most exciting voices in British comedy.Mark opens up about growing up in 1990s Southwest London where homophobia was woven into the everyday language around him, even in an otherwise loving home. He reflects on spending a decade in the closet, the fear of being gay that shaped his early years and the moment he finally allowed himself to come out and breathe.He also shares how devastating loss shaped him. Mark lost his mum shortly before his A levels and his dad shortly before his university finals. He talks about how grief transformed his understanding of life and how comedy became both a coping mechanism and a calling.Ben and Mark dive into authenticity, dating, Grindr mishaps, the power of teasing straight men in comedy clubs, and the complicated pressure queer comedians feel to stop talking about their identity even when it is central to their story.Mark also reflects on falling into comedy, getting fired from teaching, building confidence through social media, touring his show I Need a Straight Guy, and figuring out what comes next as he enters the next phase of his career.Chapters00:00 Queer Panic Rapid Fire Questions04:16 Embarrassing Dating Stories07:16 Proudest Career Moments10:13 Childhood Influences on Identity13:15 Awareness of Queerness and Family Dynamics17:21 Coming Out and Authenticity20:22 Navigating Loss and Grief25:33 The Role of Comedy in Coping27:47 Journey into Comedy31:02 Queerness and Performance32:29 Touring Experience and Audience Interaction36:22 Using Platform for Advocacy38:14 Future Aspirations and Reflection39:11 Advice to Younger Self and LGBTQ+ YouthConnect with Ben Cicchetti:Website - https://www.queertalker.com Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchettiTikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchetti
In this episode of Queer Talker, host Ben Cicchetti sits down with Lord Chris Smith — Britain’s first openly gay male MP, the world’s first openly gay cabinet minister, and a pioneering voice for LGBTQ+ equality in politics.Chris reflects on the moment in 1984 when he stood on stage in Rugby and came out publicly, becoming the first openly gay MP in British history, and the courage it took to do so in a hostile climate. He shares his perspective on Section 28, the chilling effect it had on young LGBTQ+ people, and the long fight to overturn it.We also discuss his achievements as Secretary of State, from making national museums free for all to helping pass landmark LGBTQ+ legislation under Tony Blair’s government, as well as his later decision to speak publicly about living with HIV and the extraordinary phone call he received from Nelson Mandela afterwards.From his student days in Edinburgh and Cambridge, to becoming Chancellor of the University of Cambridge, Chris has consistently broken barriers and left a lasting legacy. His story is one of courage, resilience, and hope — a reminder of how far we’ve come and the work still to be done for true equality.This episode is a must-listen for anyone interested in LGBTQ+ history, politics, and the power of visibility.Chapters00:00 Queer Panic Rapid Fire Questions03:21 Proud Moments in Politics05:52 Understanding Childhood and Identity09:38 Journey into Politics11:00 Coming Out as the First Openly Gay MP18:09 Reactions in Parliament20:07 The Impact of Section 2826:02 Becoming the First Openly Gay Cabinet Member27:41 Legislative Changes for LGBTQ Rights32:18 The Importance of Diversity in Leadership34:29 Going Public with HIV Status41:48 Role as Chancellor of Cambridge University45:32 Reflections on the Current Trans Community Climate47:43 Advice to Younger Self and LGBTQ YouthConnect with Ben Cicchetti:Website - https://www.queertalker.com Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchettiTikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchetti
In this episode of Queer Talker, host Ben Cicchetti sits down with Jaxon Feeley, former prison officer, public speaker, and trans advocate, for a powerful and deeply human conversation about courage, visibility, and doing it scared.Jaxon opens up about his life before and after transition, from working in the prison service to walking back through the gates as “Mr Feeley.” He shares how he found the strength to come out publicly, the moment he told his family they could have “a dead daughter or a living son,” and why he believes fear and bravery can exist in the same breath.From battling stigma to embracing authenticity, Jaxon’s story is one of resilience, vulnerability, and relentless hope. His mantra, “do it scared,” is a reminder that courage does not mean being fearless; it means showing up anyway.Chapters00:00 Queer Panic Rapid Fire03:35 Childhood and Early Identity08:42 Transitioning and Authenticity13:21 Family Dynamics and Support18:32 Working in a Prison Environment23:22 Reality TV Experiences28:38 Living Authentically in the World34:10 The Intensity of Reality TV34:56 Balancing Multiple Roles37:08 Finding Daily Happiness39:11 Navigating Loneliness in the Spotlight41:39 The Importance of Social Media Breaks43:27 The Thrill of Hunted: A Unique Experience56:06 The Impact of Representation in Media59:17 Introducing 'Fear Proof': A New Book01:03:38 Advice for the Younger SelfConnect with Ben Cicchetti:Website - https://www.queertalker.com Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchettiTikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchettiConnect from Jaxon Feeley:Website - https://jaxonfeeley.comInstagram - https://www.instagram.com/jaxryderfeeley
In this episode of Queer Talker, host Ben Cicchetti sits down with Alex Thomas-Smith — actor and performer whose credits span the West End, TV, and Netflix, including & Juliet, What It Feels Like For A Girl, and Lena Dunham’s Too Much.Alex reflects on their journey from childhood to the stage, sharing early memories of queer representation from Big Brother’s Nadia and Coronation Street’s Hayley Cropper, and why those moments of visibility mattered. They open up about growing up in challenging circumstances, finding strength with their sisters, and embracing authenticity without ever feeling the need for a formal “coming out.”From the thrill of starring in & Juliet to balancing intimacy and spectacle on their wedding day, Alex speaks candidly about love, representation, and how neurodiversity shapes their creativity and career. They also discuss the importance of refusing roles that erase identity, and the joy of telling queer stories unapologetically.This is a conversation about representation, resilience, and what it means to be brave enough to live without limits.Chapters00:00 Queer Panic Rapid Fire07:20 Childhood and Early Influences13:12 Awareness of Queerness19:09 Authenticity and Self-Expression25:07 Marriage and Personal Milestones25:13 The Reality of Performing Eight Shows a Week28:41 Navigating Relationships in the Theatre World31:16 Stage vs. Screen: A Performer’s Perspective33:19 Experiences on What It Feels Like For A Girl and Too Much38:51 Choosing Projects: Aligning with Authenticity40:36 The Shift in Queer Representation42:25 Neurodiversity and Performance44:47 Advice to Young Queer IndividualsConnect with Ben Cicchetti:Website - https://www.queertalker.com Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchettiTikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchetti
In this episode of Queer Talker, host Ben Cicchetti sits down with Jordan Gray — award-winning comedian, musician, writer, and the first trans woman to headline the London Palladium.Jordan reflects on her journey from pop singer to stand-up comedian, and how coming out unlocked the freedom to share her authentic self on stage. She talks about creating her hit ITV show Transaction, her Channel 4 special Is It A Bird?, and her 2025 Edinburgh Fringe show Is That a Cock in Your Pocket or Are You Just Here to Kill Me?From blending music and comedy to disarm prejudice, to navigating social media while “staying soft,” Jordan shares the highs, lows, and laughter that define her story. She also offers heartfelt advice to young queer people about choosing joy over other people’s discomfort and living unapologetically.This is a conversation about authenticity, resilience, and why comedy is one of the most powerful tools we have for connection.Chapters00:00 Queer Panic Rapid Fire04:28 Exploring Queer Media and Representation07:26 Authenticity and Personal Journey10:21 First Awareness of Queerness13:21 Transitioning from Music to Comedy16:27 The Art of Blending Music and Comedy20:51 The Journey to ITV: From Concept to Screen23:58 Writing for TV vs. Stand-Up Comedy25:59 Navigating Public Perception and Social Media30:24 The Power of Comedy in Challenging Conversations33:26 The Fine Line of Humor: Intent vs. Impact37:26 Experiencing the Edinburgh Fringe Festival38:30 Advice for the Younger Generation41:10 What's Next for Jordan Gray?Connect with Ben Cicchetti:Website - https://www.queertalker.com Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchettiTikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchetti
In this episode of Queer Talker, host Ben Cicchetti sits down with Seth Insua, debut author of Human, Animal and talented artist, for a thoughtful conversation about queerness, creativity, and finding belonging.Seth shares how a childhood obsession with Pinocchio shaped his creative spirit, how growing up queer in a homophobic all-boys school influenced his search for authenticity, and the inspiration behind his acclaimed novel. He reflects on themes of masculinity, non-belonging, and the power of perspective that run through his writing, as well as the influence of queer icons like Russell T Davies.From exploring why queerness and horror are so intertwined, to the importance of finding your people and embracing mistakes, this episode offers both intimate insight into the mind of a writer and universal lessons on living authentically.Chapters00:00 Queer Panic Game: Rapid Fire Questions04:13 Influential Queer Media: Movies, TV Shows, and Books07:20 Childhood Reflections: Growing Up Queer10:05 Writing Process: Obsession and Creativity13:25 Authenticity: Discovering and Embracing Queer Identity16:14 Inspiration Behind 'Human, Animal': A Multifaceted Story20:16 Exploring Family Dynamics in Dairy Farming23:44 The Journey of Self-Discovery and Belonging26:24 Researching Perspectives: Understanding Different Narratives30:04 Challenging Traditional Masculinity33:09 Finding Common Ground in Divisive Times36:36 The Intersection of Art and Writing41:51 Advice for the Younger GenerationConnect with Ben Cicchetti:Website - https://www.queertalker.com Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchettiTikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchettiConnect with Seth InsuaWebsite - https://www.sethinsua.com/ Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/sethinsua Buy Human, Animal - https://linktr.ee/seth.insua
In this episode of Queer Talker, host Ben Cicchetti sits down with Brandon Wolf — survivor of the Pulse nightclub shooting, national press secretary for the Human Rights Campaign, and one of the most powerful voices for LGBTQ+ equality in the United States.Brandon shares his journey from growing up in a small conservative town, to finding chosen family and queer spaces that gave him the courage to be unapologetically himself. He opens up about his best friend Drew, the night of the Pulse tragedy, and the promise he made to keep fighting for a world Drew would be proud of.From the desecration of sacred memorials to the resilience of a community that refuses to be erased, Brandon speaks candidly about grief, advocacy, and the work still to be done. He also reminds us of the joy, hope, and humanity at the heart of queer liberation — and why giving up is never an option.This is a conversation about loss, resilience, and the fight for a future where everyone can live unapologetically and authentically.Chapters00:00 Queer Panic: A Fun Introduction04:27 Exploring Identity and Safe Spaces07:33 The Impact of Community and Chosen Family10:31 Reflections on Family and Early Influences13:34 Awakening to Queerness: Media and Real Life Experiences16:16 Finding Authenticity and Belonging19:26 Life Before Pulse: Dreams and Aspirations22:34 The Significance of Pulse Nightclub25:12 Community Resilience After Tragedy30:07 Refusing to be Erased: The Resilience of the Queer Community31:44 Historical Context: Lessons from the Past34:25 Building a Movement: The Power of Persistence35:27 Remembering Drew and Juan: Stories of Friendship39:58 A Promise to Fight: Creating a World of Pride43:51 Finding Balance: Self-Care in Advocacy48:42 Community Engagement: The Power of Connection52:29 Gun Safety: Progress and Challenges56:59 Political Aspirations: Impact Over Title58:53 Advice for the Younger Generation: Be Unapologetically YouConnect with Ben Cicchetti:Website - https://www.queertalker.com Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchettiTikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchetti
In this episode of Queer Talker, host Ben Cicchetti sits down with Rico Jacob Chace, one of the UK’s most visible trans voices, award-nominated activist, and filmmaker, for a powerful conversation about trans rights, intersectionality, and the importance of joy in queer life.Rico shares how his early life shaped his stubborn self-belief, why embracing his authentic identity at 25 changed everything, and the journey from a trading floor career to the front lines of activism. He opens up about navigating the world as a Black trans man, the impact of recent UK legal rulings, and the daily realities of public advocacy.From creating safe spaces and building community to finding laughter in friendship and hope in the next generation of activists, this episode is both unflinchingly honest and deeply uplifting.Chapters00:00 Introduction to Rico Jacob Chase04:15 Queer Panic07:13 Influential Queer Media and Its Impact10:08 Childhood Experiences and Identity Formation13:05 Navigating Queerness and Authenticity16:12 Activism and Community Engagement19:05 Intersectionality: Being Black and Trans22:12 The Journey of Self-Discovery and Acceptance30:12 Navigating Identity and Privilege34:00 The Impact of Recent Legal Changes39:09 Political Tactics and Community Response43:27 Understanding the Trans Experience47:58 Finding Joy and Community53:42 Advice for the Younger GenerationConnect with Ben Cicchetti:Website - https://www.queertalker.com Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchettiTikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchettiResources Mentioned:We Create Space - https://www.wecreatespace.co Non-Binary Barrister - https://www.instagram.com/nonbinarybarrister/ Trans Legal Clinic - https://www.translegalclinic.com Not a Phase - https://notaphase.org Gay’s The Word - https://www.gaystheword.co.uk Trans+ Solidarity Alliance - https://www.transsolidarityalliance.com
In this episode of Queer Talker, host Ben Cicchetti sits down with Ella Vaday, the multi-talented drag queen and performer who went from West End shows to making it all the way to the final of RuPaul’s Drag Race UK Season 3.Ella, also known as Nick Collier, shares stories from a complicated childhood in rural Suffolk, a life shaped by performance and pressure, and the moment drag became an unexpected lifeline during lockdown. From surviving isolation on Drag Race to reclaiming confidence in her thirties, Ella talks candidly about coming out later in life, learning to stop hiding, and why you should never feel rushed to figure it all out.They also dive into the highs and lows of fame, the backstage reality of reality TV, and the joy of finding your place, whether that’s in a glittery gown or a sweaty gym. Plus, Ella opens up about navigating queer identity in a social media age, why she still doesn’t feel like she fits in, and the advice she’d give to young queer people feeling lost or unseen.This episode is a must-listen for anyone who’s still figuring it out, still finding their voice, or still waiting for their spotlight.Chapters00:00 Introduction to Ella and Queer Panic04:24 Childhood Memories and Celebrity Crushes07:34 Fashion and Drag Race Highlights10:16 Influential Queer Media and Icons13:20 Navigating Queerness and Family Dynamics16:17 Advice for Young Queer Individuals19:30 Social Media and Its Impact on Queerness26:03 Embracing Authenticity and Self-Acceptance28:35 Navigating the Performing Arts Journey33:11 The Evolution of a Drag Queen37:45 The Rollercoaster of Drag Race Experience42:17 Adjusting to Fame and Public Scrutiny47:53 Lessons Learned and Advice for the FutureConnect with Ben Cicchetti:Website - https://www.queertalker.com Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchettiTikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchetti
In this episode of Queer Talker, host Ben Cicchetti sits down with the electrifying Love Bailey, artist, musician, activist, and founder of the Savage Ranch, for a powerful and unapologetically fierce conversation about art, identity, rebellion, and queer survival.Love shares her early experiences with homophobia and performance, her journey through fashion and celebrity styling, and her path to living fully as the woman she is today. From dancing with pigs at the Savage Ranch to releasing her music video Tranz Panic, she reveals how glamour, satire, and protest come together in her vision of queer utopia.They discuss the making of her film The Battle for TransMecula, the ongoing fight against anti-trans legislation in the US, and the importance of community, visibility, and refusing to dim your light. Love speaks openly about being shadowbanned, navigating misogyny even within queer spaces, and why fantasy is her fiercest form of resistance.This episode is a must-listen for anyone passionate about trans joy, radical queer art, and creating a world where we can all exist louder and prouder.Chapters00:00 Introduction to Love Bailey02:40 Queer Panic05:31 The Journey to Authenticity08:25 Creating the Savage Ranch11:19 The Inspiration Behind Transpanic13:59 The Battle for TransMecula17:00 Visibility and Representation in Queer Spaces20:07 Advice for the Younger GenerationLearn More About Love Bailey:Website - https://www.lovebailey.com Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/loveisbaileyConnect with Ben Cicchetti:Website - https://www.queertalker.com Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchettiTikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchetti
In this heartfelt episode of Queer Talker, host Ben Cicchetti sits down with writer, podcaster, and creative force Andrew Flewitt to explore his powerful journey, from growing up queer in a conservative town to building an unapologetically authentic life grounded in creativity, connection, and self-discovery.Andrew opens up about what inspired his moving book Do You Believe In Life After Loss, why Brighton became a turning point in embracing his queerness, and how losing and rebuilding family, love, and identity helped him discover a deeper version of himself. He shares how queerness has become his superpower, why community is vital, and how amplifying diverse queer voices became his creative mission.They also talk about the losses we don’t always name, of safety, identity, opportunity, and why queer storytelling is essential in an era of rising hate. This is a raw, hopeful conversation about finding joy through pain, creating space for grief, and learning to love the version of yourself that emerges on the other side.This episode is a must-listen for anyone navigating loss, craving connection, or ready to embrace the radical, resilient joy of being queer.Chapters00:00 Understanding Andrew's Early Years02:57 The Impact of LGBTQ Representation05:57 Finding Authenticity and Community08:52 Embracing Queerness and Creativity11:53 The Importance of Diverse Voices14:49 Navigating Loss and Resilience17:43 The Journey of Writing a Book20:43 The Power of Podcasting24:05 Exploring Different Types of Loss26:58 Cultural Reflections and Queer Experiences29:58 The Role of Music in Identity32:47 Hope and Grief Coexisting35:53 Life After Loss39:02 The Importance of Community41:52 Supporting Independent Creatives44:46 Rapid Fire Questions and Personal InsightsLearn More About Andrew Flewitt:LinkTree - https://linktr.ee/fleweyactuallyFollow Ben Cicchetti:Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchettiTikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchetti
In this episode of Queer Talker, host Ben Cicchetti sits down with Chris McAllister—comedian, writer, actor, and self-described “person-next-door funny”—to explore how humor, identity, and visibility can work together to spark real social change.Chris shares how growing up as a tomboy in Northern England shaped their early sense of self, why they came out as a lesbian before later identifying as transmasc, and how their wife helped unlock their fullest, most authentic self. They reflect on the healing power of sobriety, the complexity of pregnancy as a trans person, and the joy of helping others understand trans identity—one joke at a time.They also unpack what it’s like to be visibly trans in today’s political climate, why curiosity should be met with compassion, and how laughter can soften hearts, shift narratives, and open minds. From viral Instagram videos to starring in the web series Kit, Chris proves that trans joy isn’t just powerful—it’s disarming.This episode is a must-listen for anyone passionate about trans visibility, using your voice for change, and finding joy in being unapologetically you.Chapters00:00 The Power of Humor in Social Change01:31 Childhood and Identity Formation05:45 First Encounters with LGBTQ+ Representation09:51 Navigating Authenticity and Relationships11:40 Comparing Trans Rights: UK vs Australia16:31 The Impact of Social Media on Trans Visibility19:42 The Role of Comedy in Education25:32 Balancing Visibility and Safety29:38 Advice for Younger Generations33:40 Rapid Fire Questions and Personal FavoritesFollow Ben Cicchetti:Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchettiTikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchetti
In this powerful episode of Queer Talker, host Ben Cicchetti sits down with Ali Najjar, Pride Award winner, proud gay Muslim man, and fierce advocate for hope, to explore a life marked by resilience, reinvention, and radical authenticity.Ali opens up about growing up gay in a Muslim household, surviving relentless bullying at school, facing trauma in the workplace, and living two lives before finally embracing his truth. He reflects on the journey to self-acceptance, the heartbreak of losing his father, and the years-long rift with his mother, until their relationship was joyfully restored at his wedding to his husband, Adam.They also unpack the beauty and complexity of intersectional identity, the need for inclusive queer representation in media and faith spaces, and the lasting impact of being seen and celebrated. Plus, Ali shares the moment he realized he had to speak up, how he turned pain into power, and why he’s never looking back.This episode is a must-listen for anyone passionate about queer liberation, cultural identity, and the lifelong process of healing, belonging, and living out loud.Chapters:00:00 Understanding LGBTQ+ Identity Through Childhood Experiences04:09 The Journey to Authenticity and Self-Acceptance18:42 Navigating Intersectionality as a Queer Muslim21:19 Growing Up in the 80s: Challenges and Bullying26:01 Workplace Challenges and Sexual Assault Experiences33:19 The Importance of Safe Spaces in the LGBTQ Community38:32 Celebrating Love: Marriage and Acceptance47:43 Cultural Icons and Their InfluenceFollow Ben Cicchetti:Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchettiTikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchetti
In this episode of Queer Talker, host Ben Cicchetti sits down with Helen Scott — author of Live, Laugh, Lesbian, radio DJ, stand-up comedian, and content creator — to explore her vibrant queer journey and the power of showing up authentically online and offline.Helen opens up about navigating bullying as a child, discovering her sexuality in an era with little representation, and the moment queer nightlife gave her that first true sense of belonging. She also shares how her online community inspired her bestselling book, why we must embrace fluidity in identity, and how the queer community can come together to fight division in the face of rising hostility.They dive into the double-edged sword of social media, the importance of offline queer spaces, and practical advice for anyone — from teens to those coming out later in life — looking to build community and live joyfully as their true self.This episode is a must-listen for anyone passionate about queer joy, authentic representation, and building a stronger, more connected LGBTQ+ community.Chapters00:00 Understanding Childhood Influences on Identity01:45 First Awareness of LGBTQ+ Community04:42 The Journey to Authenticity07:53 The Impact of Community and Belonging10:40 The Birth of 'Live, Laugh, Lesbian'13:42 Navigating Stereotypes and Expectations16:54 The Role of Social Media in Representation20:02 The Power of Authenticity in Visibility24:04 Embracing Authenticity and Self-Acceptance27:08 Building Community in Real Life31:04 Advice for the Younger Self and the Queer Community34:39 Celebrating Queer Icons and Representation38:12 The Impact of Writing and LegacyFollow Ben Cicchetti:Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchettiTikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchetti
In this episode of Queer Talker, host Ben Cicchetti sits down with Zander Murray, who made history as Scotland’s first openly gay senior footballer. From the weight of secrecy to the freedom of coming out, Zander shares his deeply personal journey—one shaped by resilience and the hope of creating lasting change in the world of sport.Zander opens up about the moment he knew he had to come out, the unexpected support that followed, and the mental toll of staying closeted in a hyper-masculine environment. He reflects on football culture, the barriers that still exist for LGBTQ+ players, and why true representation matters both on and off the pitch.They also explore what it means to live authentically, the pressure of being seen as a role model, and how Zander’s work today continues to champion inclusion and visibility for the next generation of athletes.This episode is a must-listen for anyone passionate about football, queer visibility in sport, and the transformative power of living your truth.Chapters00:00 Understanding Zander's Early Life04:20 The Journey of Self-Discovery07:07 The Impact of Role Models10:01 Coming Out: A Personal Journey13:03 Navigating Media and Public Perception16:03 The Role of Football in LGBTQ+ Inclusion19:15 Challenges of Being a Role Model22:05 The Future of LGBTQ+ Representation in Football32:22 The Impact of Coming Out in Sports34:50 Transitioning from Player to Advocate39:50 Empowering the Next Generation of LGBTQ+ Athletes44:53 Overcoming Internalized Homophobia48:36 Celebrating Authenticity and Team Support54:16 New ChapterFollow Ben Cicchetti:Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchettiTikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchetti
In this episode of Queer Talker, host Ben Cicchetti sits down with author Robby Weber, whose joyful and heartfelt queer love stories have helped thousands of readers see themselves on the page—and escape into something beautiful.Robby shares how a lifelong love of stories turned into a career, the surprising power of writing flawed queer characters, and why authenticity is an ongoing journey—not a destination. He opens up about navigating social media, the emotional messages he receives from readers, and how growing up in Florida fuels his passion to fight for queer visibility, especially in the face of book bans.They also discuss the joy of queer romance, how Robby finds inspiration in real friendships, and what we lose when LGBTQ+ stories are always rooted in trauma.This episode is a must-listen for anyone who loves YA fiction, queer joy, and the power of books to change lives.Chapters00:00 Introduction to Robby Weber04:19 The Journey of Authenticity07:25 Navigating Negativity and Social Media10:23 The Importance of Representation in Literature13:12 The Evolution of Writing Career15:47 Inspiration and Creative Process18:22 Connecting with Readers through Social Media21:36 Reflections on Young Love and Personal Experiences24:18 Celebrating Queer Joy in Literature27:36 Advice for Young LGBTQ+ Individuals29:06 Legacy and Impact of LGBTQ+ Stories32:55 The Importance of Flawed Characters37:10 Dream Collaborations and Future ProjectsMore from Robby Weber:Website: https://www.robbyweber.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/robbyreads/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@robby.reads Preorder Everything About You: https://www.robbyweber.com/everything-about-you/ Follow Ben Cicchetti:Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchettiTikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchetti
In this episode of Queer Talker, host Ben Cicchetti sits down with Rebecca Minor, gender specialist, author, educator, and clinician, to explore her powerful work supporting trans and gender-diverse youth on their journey of becoming—and helping their families affirm them every step of the way.Rebecca opens up about her own queer journey, growing up in creative spaces, navigating compulsory heterosexuality, and the moment she decided to publicly live her truth. She shares what inspired her to become a gender specialist, and how she uses “possibility modelling” to show young queer people that their futures can be bright, joyful, and expansive.They also unpack the disinformation crisis surrounding trans identities, the political weaponization of gender, and the misconceptions parents and the public still hold. Plus, Rebecca offers heartfelt advice for families, educators, and allies alike—and teases her upcoming book Raising Trans Kids: What to Expect When You Weren’t Expecting This.This episode is a must-listen for anyone passionate about affirming queer youth, breaking down harmful narratives, and building a world where everyone is free to live authentically.00:00 Understanding the Role of a Gender Specialist04:18 Exploring Personal Identity and Childhood Experiences07:22 The Impact of Representation in Media10:16 Authenticity and Professional Identity13:20 The Political Landscape of Gender Issues16:24 Misinformation and Disinformation in Gender Discussions19:31 Supporting Trans and Non-Binary Youth22:20 Advice for Parents of LGBTQ+ Children25:21 Navigating Family Dynamics and Acceptance28:18 Messages of Hope for LGBTQ+ Youth31:15 Rapid Fire Questions and Personal InsightsMore from Rebecca:Website: https://www.genderspecialist.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/gender.specialist/ Preorder Raising Trans Kids (UK): https://tinyurl.com/yxdpjr2aPreorder Raising Trans Kids (US): https://tinyurl.com/32jxv5uy Follow Ben Cicchetti:Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchettiTikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchetti
In this episode of Queer Talker, host Ben Cicchetti sits down with Zac Haniff—Senior Social Video Journalist at Metro UK, content creator, and proud pop culture obsessive—to explore his journey from camcorder kid to one of the UK’s most vibrant queer voices in media.Zac opens up about growing up in a very “non-queer” household with two brothers, discovering his passion for video editing and Disney Channel dreams, and how moving to London unlocked his sense of self. He shares how he launched Charlotte Tilbury’s TikTok, built Metro’s entertainment channel, and the importance of using social media to spotlight joy and escape the doomscroll.Zac dives into why queer content is essential in dark times, how Metro is rewriting what inclusion looks like in media, and the queer icons who’ve shaped Zac’s world—including JoJo Siwa, Rebecca Black, and RuPaul. Zac also reflects on authenticity in the digital age, the art of the celebrity interview, and why he’s manifesting a moment with Ariana and Cynthia for Wicked: For Good.This episode is a must-listen for anyone passionate about queer joy, pop culture, and building platforms that make us feel seen, safe, and celebrated.00:00 Introduction02:08 Metro Pride Awards Experience04:46 Childhood Influences and Early Interests08:01 Authenticity and Self-Discovery09:57 Journey into Social Media14:53 Memorable Interviews and Impactful Moments19:57 The Importance of Queer Representation in Pop Culture25:02 Looking Ahead: Excitement for 202529:54 The Power of Voice in the LGBTQ+ Community34:45 The Power of Representation in Media38:59 Advice to Younger Generations48:08 Starstruck Moments and Celebrity Encounters50:59 Favorite Queer Icons and Cultural ImpactFollow Ben Cicchetti:Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchettiTikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchettiBluesky - https://bsky.app/profile/bencicchetti.com
In this episode of Queer Talker, host Ben Cicchetti sits down with Blair Imani—historian, educator, author, and creator of Smarter in Seconds—to explore her remarkable journey as a Black, queer, Muslim woman navigating identity, visibility, and activism in today’s world.Blair shares how her early experiences shaped her deep sense of purpose, how discovering intersectionality changed everything, and why authenticity—online and offline—is the key to her voice and platform. She reflects on moments of erasure, finding community, and the personal cost of being visible in a time of increasing political hostility.She also dives into the evolution of Smarter in Seconds, the power of reclaiming terms like “woke” and “DEI,” and how education, storytelling, and joy can be acts of resistance.This episode is a must-listen for anyone passionate about intersectionality, representation, and the ongoing fight to ensure every queer person is seen, celebrated, and safe.Follow Ben Cicchetti:Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/bencicchetti/ YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@BenCicchetti TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@bencicchetti Follow Blair:Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/blairimani/ TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@blairimani