Recovery Elevator

Today we have Ty. She is 76 years old, lives in Bozeman, MT and she took her last drink on March 8th, 2008.   This episode brought to you by: Better Help – 10% off of your first month #sponsored Café RE – THE social app for sober people.   [04:21] Thoughts from Paul:   Paul tells us that every time he goes into a retreat or event with RE, he asks the universe to send us a (safe) wildlife encounter. This past retreat in Bozeman was no different.  This time, it showed up in the form of a bald eagle while we were spending time at the lake pavilion. After it flew in, it perched on a lone pine tree branch about 50 yards away from us where we admired it’s beauty and Ty, an avid birder, shared some facts about the bald eagle with the group.     Paul shared that while editing the interview he did with Ty, he noticed some background noise. Normally, he does his best to avoid this, but this time he welcomed it. You will hear in the background the sound of birds. He says it was if the universe sent the birds to support Ty.   [08:45] Paul introduces Ty:   Ty lives in Bozeman, MT with her husband Dan. She likes to hike (gently), watch birds and enjoys reading. She is technically retired but has been editing the RE podcast since episode 25.   Ty grew up with an alcoholic father in Fort Worth, TX. Her mother did not allow alcohol in the house, so her father was gone a lot. Ty didn’t drink much during high school due to the fear of her mother detecting it on her.   After she graduated, Ty got married to her boyfriend. That marriage didn’t last long because her husband was an alcoholic and became abusive. They divorced when she was 21. During that time Ty would go out with friends she worked with where they would drink together. She says her rebellion against her father came out in that time – it was the early 70’s filled with drugs and rock and roll.   Ty said she spiraled shortly after her dad died and went through a dark time. She sought help from the county health board and after they placed her on mood stabilizers, she started drinking less.   At age 26, Ty went to university where she chose doing well in school over drinking and partying. A month after graduating college, Ty had a baby. Her daughter had a lot of health and developmental issues, so she became a full-time caregiver for her throughout her 30s.   In her 40s, Ty met her current husband Dan, who does not drink. They moved to Bar Harbor, where Ty worked in the restaurant industry. This exposed her to fine wine, which she would enjoy at home after work, while her husband was sleeping. Ty says red flags began to show when she switched to vodka because it has less calories. She began to hide her bottles and drink in secret.   Moderation for Ty was when she would quit drinking for Lent. One year she found that she wasn’t able to which got her thinking more about her drinking. She was attending Al-Anon meetings but was interested in the literature for AA. After taking some quizzes to determine if she was an alcoholic, she started to believe she might be.   The next morning while in church, Ty says she prayed: “I can’t do this will you help me”. That evening she went to her first AA meeting where she introduced herself as an alcoholic. It was the first time she had said it to herself or anyone else.   Ty says she burned the ships early on. Honesty and openness became very important to her. She knew she had to do the work and became comfortable asking her husband for support in various ways. AA has been a big part of Ty’s recovery story since the beginning. She has witnessed a lot of growth and change in the recovery world since quitting. Joining RE opened up so much for her and she says her toolbox expanded in terms of resources and learning different things.   Ty’s parting piece of guidance: it’s harder to get sober than it is to stay sober.   Recovery Elevator You took the elevator down, you gotta take the stairs back up. We can do this.       RE on Instagram Recovery Elevator YouTube Sobriety Tracker iTunes     

Today we have David. He is 51 years old, lives in Pinson, TN and took his last drink of alcohol on December 23rd, 2024.   This episode brought to you by: Better Help – 10% off of your first month #sponsored Exact Nature – 20% off your order with code RE20   We have a great lineup of events and courses coming to Recovery Elevator. A mindfulness course is coming up in October, then Dry January as well as a beginner ukelele course are happening in January. In February we have our first AF Songwriting course and later in the month our weeklong sober travel trip to Costa Rica.   [03:11] Thoughts from Paul:   In today’s intro Paul shares with us some statements he heard from Steven Glover (aka Steve-O from Jackass) who celebrates 17 years in recovery this year. Steve-O said that alcoholics are in a sense lucky because unlike other diseases where the best one can hope for is to return to a pre-illness state, when addicts and alcoholics treat their disease, they have the potential to become better versions of themselves.   In Paul’s upcoming book Dolce Vita, he makes the point that addiction is almost a biological mechanism to help wake us up as humans. On the other side of the addiction, if we are to heal, then we have to build a life that is more oriented towards helping others, where we are to be more authentic and where we are to admit when we are wrong in life.   One of the biggest mistakes that people make when they quit drinking is they just quit drinking. Although this is a huge step in the right direction, if this is all you do it leads to the concept of being a dry drunk. You need to address the reasons you drank to excess in the first place.   By listening to a sobriety podcast, you are doing the work. You’re investing in your recovery, and you are not a dry drunk. Your potential of becoming better than before is becoming a reality. And what wonderful timing you have as the world needs your honesty, your authenticity, your smile and your service more than ever.   [08:16] Paul introduces David:   David is 51 years old and was born and raised in West Tennessee. He has three adult children with his wife of 31 years. For work, he manages a manufacturing facility and for fun he is a lifelong musician and also enjoys genealogy and cemetery preservation.   David is the youngest of four children. He says his mother was a teetotaler and his father had a drinking problem, but it had tapered down a lot by the time David came along. David says he was raised in the country and had a small group of friends that his mother would say weren’t the best influences, and David was more of a follower than a leader and he and his friends would experiment with alcohol when he was younger.   When David was 18, he met his wife. They got married in David’s early twenties and began having kids. At this point, David didn’t drink often, and his wife didn’t drink at all. It wasn’t until their thirties that they would start having the occasional bottle of wine in the house.   In his late thirties, the drinking began ramping up. David began to have a regular music gig that was 45 minutes from home. He began going to have dinner and beers before the gig and over time started going out again after the gigs as well. He began drinking more on the weekends and that eventually crept into every day while isolating.   After some negative health reports in 2019, David began to try and address his drinking and says it was like a hamster wheel. By 2021, he knew he wanted to pursue an alcohol-free life and shared this with his wife, who has been very supportive of him.   Since his last drink in 2024, David says all of his relationships have improved, his bass playing has improved, and he started college last year and will be graduating soon. David is looking forward to continuing his personal growth, learning to meditate and travel.   Recovery Elevator You took the elevator down, you gotta take the stairs back up. We can do this.       RE on Instagram Recovery Elevator YouTube Sobriety Tracker iTunes  Café RE    

Today we have Odette. She’s 37 years old, lives in San Diego, CA and she took her last drink 486 days ago.   This episode brought to you by: Better Help – 10% off of your first month #sponsored Exact Nature – 20% off your order with code RE20   Registration is open for our next retreat in Costa Rica. That’s February 21st – 28th, 2026 in Guanacaste, a Blue Zone. We are over halfway full, but we have seven spots left.   [03:09] Thoughts from Paul:   When 17 people send Paul an article in the span of 2-3 days, he knows it means something big just came out… and this one is big because it disarms one of the biggest reasons why it’s so hard to quit drinking: everyone else is drinking. Which is no longer true. Several publication released this article and here’s the link for the CBS article.   It says - only 54% of U.S. adults say they drink alcohol, a record low. There is a growing belief that even moderate alcohol consumption is a health risk which is 100% correct. In 2015 28% of Americans though this but now in 2025, that percentage has almost doubled to 53%.   While mostly younger Americans are driving this trend, but older Americans are getting on board as well and the alcohol industry is tanking. Paul says that he can’t help but feel that we all have had a part in this. That we, including you, the listener, have saved lives by doing our part getting the proper messaging out about alcohol, and people are listening.   So, you’re not the only one who doesn’t drink. Paul doesn’t drink, Odette doesn’t drink and 46% of Americans don’t drink either.   [07:57] Paul introduces Odette:   In addition to being interviewed on episodes 128 and 231, Odette was the podcast host from episode 277 to 378.   Odette is from Guadalajara, Mexico but has been living in San Diego, CA with her husband, two kids and a variety of pets. She works in operations for a company called Chosen Foods. Around a year ago, she began teaching breathwork as well. For fun, she and her family enjoy being outside, especially at the beach.   Odette shares that addiction runs in her family, her father, who recently hit 16 years sober, went into rehab when Odette was 18. At the time she was struggling with an eating disorder and clinical depression. She never expected alcohol to be a problem for her.   Odette moved to the US with her husband after she graduated college. She kept her eating, and depression issues a secret for about a year after they got married but ended up going into treatment for it because she knew she needed to be healthy in order to have kids.   After having their first child, Odette says that she fell into the “mommy wine culture” pretty quickly. Playdates included toys for the kids and wine for the moms. Over time she began to look forward to drinking but there was always a knowing that this wasn’t her authentic self, she says. The drinking helped her feel like she fit in.   The drinking and her eating disorder didn’t play well together. She found the lines getting blurry and she wasn’t listening to her body as well as before. Since she didn’t drink much, she wasn’t sure she really had a problem, but it was all taking a toll mentally.   During the time Odette was hosting the RE podcast, her grandmother got sick. She lives far from her family and the uncertainty of the situation and pain of not being there was too much for her. Even with all of her tools, Odette found herself relapsing. She struggled with the shame of it and felt a little lost but leaning into the community and learning how to accept herself has been important to getting her footing back.   Odette says recovery isn’t about fixing yourself, it’s about accepting all of the things that you are.  Breathwork has been helpful for Odette to learn how to get back in touch with her body and be present.   The Harmony House Odette Cressler   Recovery Elevator You took the elevator down, you gotta take the stairs back up. I love you guys.       RE on Instagram Recovery Elevator YouTube Sobriety Tracker iTunes  Café RE    

Today we have Justin. He is 40 years old and lives in Northern Ontario. He took his last drink on August 20th, 2023.   This episode brought to you by: Better Help – 10% off of your first month #sponsored Café RE – the social app for sober people   [04:03] Thoughts from Paul:   In our question for sobriety, we often ask ourselves why the drinking? Why can’t I stop? What’s the problem here?    Paul shares his experience with the 12 Steps of AA, more specifically, step 4 where you list all of your resentments. He filled an entire notebook for his fourth step and after reading this out loud to his sponsor, it became clear to him that he was at least 50% of every problem that he encountered or had been part of. The fourth step showed him the patterns, and the data was clear – he was the problem. The same is true for all of us.   It turns out, in a non-shaming way, you are the problem, and you are not the solution. This should be empowering because if you are the problem, you’re the only thing you can control. The solution is not a one and done thing. The big one here is to burn the ships and to start building community.   We used alcohol to numb the pains of living in a super challenging world, and the solution is that we have to find a better way to respond to the world and we have to come together to make this happen.   [08:39] Paul introduces Justin:   Justin is from Northern Ontario, has been married for 14 years and they have two dogs and cat. Formerly an electrician, Justin is now a part-time day trader. He enjoys hiking, yoga and meditation. Justin and his wife Danielle quit drinking together just over two years ago.   Justin had his first drink at age 15 with some friends. He didn’t see the point in drinking at first but was happy to have friends to drink with. Over time he not only enjoyed spending time with friends he also began to enjoy the drinking too.   At 18, Justin had a job with a sound and lighting company, and they would do a lot of concerts. He reflects that the amount of booze that was around and available to him for free was insane. Within the next two years he developed a habit of drinking 10 to 20 beers a day. In addition to the drinking, Justin had developed an addiction to harder drugs.   When Justin was around age 23, he quit the job and doing hard drugs but used alcohol to help him. This contributed to his intake increasing and he was still drinking daily. Because he wasn’t doing hard drugs anymore, he thought it was ok, and he was living clean. After Justin’s third DUI charge in 2015, he begins to realize that he might have a problem. He quit for five days and decided he didn’t have a problem, so he went back to drinking.   Living in a small town where many people drank more than them, Justin and Danielle had the illusion that they “weren’t that bad”. They enjoyed drinking together most of the time, but when they began fighting more often, they acknowledged that there might be an issue. They began trying moderation techniques, but eventually knew they just needed to stop altogether.   They drank one last time after losing their horse and Justin says he had the worst hangover the next day. They both had already been listening to the RE podcast and had joined Café RE. Justin is grateful to being doing this with his partner and they find strength in one another.   Justin was just diagnosed with a brain tumor, so they are planning a big move back to Southern Ontario to be closer to family. Being sober for these life changes is a gift, Justin says. When asked what his mantra has been for the last few months Justin says “go with the flow, keep on truckin’, be like water. You can’t fight life. Life is just going to push you as it pushes you and generally, you’ll get what you need”.   Justin’s parting piece of guidance: the only way out is through. You gotta go through it to move out of it.       Recovery Elevator We took the elevator down. We gotta take the stairs back up. I love you guys.   RE on Instagram Recovery Elevator YouTube Sobriety Tracker iTunes       

Today we have Amy. She is 41 years old and lives in Raleigh, NC. She took her last drink on December 12th, 2023.   This episode brought to you by: Better Help – 10% off of your first month #sponsored Exact Nature – use code RE20 to save 20% off of your order   October 2026 we have a new retreat we have yet to do. This is an in-person alcohol-free ukulele retreat taking place in Guanacaste, Costa Rica. There will be ukulele instruction in the mornings and Spanish immersion courses in the afternoon.   [02:01] Thoughts from Paul:   Addiction is disconnecting with the self and your fellow humans. More sobriety is connection with the self, your fellow humans and more. “I” equals illness, “we” equals wellness.   Quitting drinking is a perfect circle. Your drinking crisis is an opportunity for someone to help. Phrased with 12 step verbiage, your first step is someone else’s 12th step. And when you find your footing, you can then assist someone else in their drinking crisis.   When the soul is hurting, the healing only happens when you’re not alone. And speaking of being alone, listeners, you are not alone. You are not the only one who struggles with alcohol. You, along with the other listeners, are seeking not only sobriety but seeking a deeper connection with all. Seeking answers that the bottle can’t deliver. You are in the right place.   [07:37] Paul introduces Amy:   Amy is 41 years old and lives in Raleigh, NC with her husband and a three-year-old son. Amy says she is a theater nerd and does improv comedy for fun.    Amy grew up in the southwest side of Chicago where she says her father was an alcoholic. She has memories of being a child at AA and Al-Anon meetings with her parents as well as memories of her father taking her to bars when they would tell her mother they were somewhere else.   Amy had her first drink when she was 15 while going to a concert with older teens. There was a bottle passed around the group and they all got drunk. Later that night she was found in the field of the concert venue by paramedics and taken to the hospital to have her stomach pumped.   She began to live a double life throughout high school and college. Amy saw that if she got good grades and joined all of the clubs, she would get praise and recognition. On the flip side she would drink very hard, and it wasn’t uncommon for her to get alcohol poisoning. Only after going to grad school in New York was Amy able to calm down a bit.   After COVID, Amy and her husband were doing IVF. Amy says she didn’t drink much at this point, but after having the baby, she suffered from postpartum anxiety which led her to daily drinking as a tool to cope with it. Over time she would begin to try moderation but limiting herself to two drinks was difficult and led to binges.   Amy’s last bender was at a holiday work party. The next day she found herself hungover and asked herself how her drinking was any better than her father’s was when she was younger. She knew that she may be heading down a dangerous path, so Amy decided to call the local AA helpline.   Amy began going to AA meetings and found a sponsor. She shares that her mother was a great support because of her experience with Al-Anon and she understood what Amy was going through.   One of the best things for Amy was burning the ships and gaining accountability. Even after 18 months, Amy admits there is white knuckling at times. She realizes that after 25 years of drinking, it doesn’t all heal within 18 months, but she is grateful to be where she is and says that since getting sober, she hasn’t missed a day of her son’s life.   Amy’s parting piece of guidance: everything that she was looking for while getting drunk can be found in recovery and she found it in Café RE and AA. Take what works and leave the rest.   Recovery Elevator It all starts from the inside out. I love you guys.   Café RE – the social app for sober people RE on Instagram Recovery Elevator YouTube Sobriety Tracker iTunes       

Today we have Brian. He is 40 years old from Spring Hill, MA and he took his last drink of alcohol on July 16th, 2024.   This episode brought to you by: Better Help – 10% off of your first month #sponsored Exact Nature – 20% off your order with code RE20   Shout out to these alcohol-free brands for sponsoring our seventh Bozeman Retreat:   Athletic Brewing Sober Link - save 50% on a device Rise Up Coffee Better Rhodes – use code RECOV_EL_15 at checkout for 15% off Odyssey Elixirs   [03:25] Thoughts from Paul:   Paul shares with us Bill W., the founder of AA once shared letters back and forth with Swiss psychologist Carl Yung looking for feedback on the program he was creating. Perhaps the most important letter from Yung to Bill W. was a letter suggesting a spiritual solution was needed to overcome addiction. He was a firm believer that addiction has nothing to do with weakness but is a misdirected cry for wholeness.   Another viewpoint that Carl Yung gave us is to not ask why you want to quit drinking but what pain you are trying to silence? Or what role is alcohol playing?   When we start asking the right questions and stop fighting the addiction, the healing process begins. If you keep doing your own inner work, the massive ship called your addiction will change course. It takes time to redirect the energy called an addiction, but when we start asking the right questions, it’s going to happen. It’s just a matter of time.   [07:36] Paul introduces Brian:   Brian is 40 years old and lives in Springfield, MA. He has been married 13 years, and they have two children. For fun he enjoys weight training, cooking, and spending time with his kids.   Brian is the oldest of four kids and his parents divorced when he was young. He shares that he internalized a lot of stuff growing up and carried a lot of emotion. Brian wasn’t the kid to act out, but he recalls the first time he drank was when his mother was out of town and he ended up getting very sick. He says it taught him a lesson, and he didn’t party much in high school.   In college, Brian says, alcohol acted like that warm hug that people talk about. It gave him a lot of confidence socially and he became friends with people older than him. Once they started graduating, he lost a lot of the friends he drank with, so he found himself drinking alone occasionally which he didn’t think there was anything wrong with.   After graduation, the job market was tough which had Brian stressed out and he began using alcohol as a coping mechanism. He was drinking daily and ended up getting pancreatitis after a while, which was a bit of a wake up call for him. The drinking didn’t end but Brian began to try and moderate.   Over the years Brian was able to quit for periods of time but would return to drinking to cope with traumatic events. He was working on sobriety, watching YouTube videos, trying naltrexone and listening to podcasts. He was making progress, but COVID came and knocked him down again.   Brian did not want to fall onto the same path that his father had with his alcoholism. Brian had a rock bottom moment when his behavior on a vacation had him showing a negative side of himself to his in-laws.   On the weekend of his wife’s birthday, Brian had a few days sober, and his internal voice was trying to convince him to drink. He turned on the RE podcast while he was mowing the lawn and soon after had made the decision that he was going to quit drinking forever. He then burned the ships and told his wife about his decision.   Since quitting drinking Brian’s health has improved, he has lost 35 pounds and has found a community in Café RE. He is planning on finding more connection locally to him through AA soon.   Brian’s parting piece of guidance: listen to your heart rather than your brain. Follow your instincts.   Recovery Elevator You took the elevator down, you gotta take the stairs back up. We can do this.       RE on Instagram Recovery Elevator YouTube Sobriety Tracker iTunes  Café RE    

Today we have Lori. She is 58 years old from Vancouver, Canada. She took her last drink on February 21st, 2024.   This episode brought to you by: Better Help – 10% off of your first month #sponsored Café RE – the social app for sober people   [03:11] Thoughts from Paul:   Paul shares that his second book, Dolce Vita, is currently in the editing process and should be out by November this year. This was also the name of the bar he owned Spain when he was in his 20’s. The name is Italian for “the good life” which Paul once thought he could find at the bottom of a bottle. He began to notice that his Dolce Vita had an expiration date that would get shorter and shorter over time.   The thing Paul thought was delivering the dolce vita was slowly and methodically destroying any chance of having one. It wasn’t until he finally ditched the booze that the good life actually showed up. He learned that the sweetness wasn’t in escaping life, it was finally showing up for it.   The good life is right here in front of us all, right here in this moment, as long as we stay away from a drink today.   [09:19] Paul introduces Lori:   Lori is 58 years old and lives in the suburbs of Vancouver, Canada. She has been married for 37 years, and they have two grown children and one grandchild. Lori has been a realtor for 35 years and for fun she enjoys golf and physical fitness.    Lori shares that she had a great childhood, but her mother was an alcoholic, and it affected her negatively throughout the years. In high school, Lori aspired to be an actress and craved attention. Having an already outgoing personality, it just got bigger when she was drinking and garnered more attention.   Lori had a lot of resentments towards her mother over the years and admits she treated her poorly. They did not make amends before her mother passed, and Lori says that is when her drinking started ramping up. On the outside, everything was going well with her career and her kids, but the weekends revolved around drinking.   Some mornings Lori would wake up depressed, regretful of her actions the night before and be plagued with the “not again” feelings. Lori and her husband would discuss cutting back on drinking and she acknowledges that he only drank as much as he did because of her.   In 2022 Lori was able to quit drinking for 77 days with the help of This Naked Mind and participated in two 30-day alcohol experiments. Then something negative happened and Lori found herself reaching for a glass of wine. Before long she was drinking at any time of day, hiding alcohol in her sock drawer and sneaking shots of moonshine.   After a weekend trip with some friends where Lori could not get the happy buzz that she was looking for from the alcohol, she knew that something had to change. She joined the RE Ukelele course and decided to stick around. With the help and encouragement of some fellow members, she started to believe that maybe she could be alcohol-free.   Lori began going to a lot of chats with Café RE, first with the camera off just taking notes. She began to participate by asking questions and listening. The community has helped Lori find her mantra to hit the pillow sober every night. The first 30 days felt like the calendar was moving backwards, but she kept going.   Lori still stays social with her friends but has recently been feeling like she is at a crossroads. Some events that used to be fun no longer are and she is feeling a shift. The RE community means a lot to her and she is currently seeking more sober connections local to her.   Some of the bright lights in sobriety for Lori are the ability to be heard, being reliable, and she now feels better physically as well as mentally.   Lori’s parting piece of guidance: please decide your “whys” If the cons outweigh the pros, you need to take alcohol out of your life.   Recovery Elevator You took the elevator down, you gotta take the stairs back up. We can do this. I love you guys.     RE on Instagram Recovery Elevator YouTube Sobriety Tracker iTunes     

Today we have Rachel. She is 48 years old and lives in Minneapolis, MN. She took her last drink on August 28th, 2018.   This episode brought to you by: Better Help – 10% off of your first month #sponsored Sober Link – learn more and save $50 off of a device     Come join us in beautiful Bozeman, Montana this August 6th – 10th for our annual flagship retreat. We have a few camping spots as well as a few spots left in the men’s cabin.   [02:50] Thoughts from Paul:   Healing can look a bit like a paradox and Paul shares several examples showing this. Tying this same idea into ditching the booze we can say that quitting drinking can make you feel more anxious at first, when it’s actually making you calmer in the long run. Quitting drinking can make you feel more emotional and raw when it’s actually making you more resilient. Sobriety can make you feel bored at first, but it’s actually clearing space for hobbies and adventures that you’ll deeply enjoy.   Healing can hurt at first, but look out, brighter days are just on the horizon. Can you do this? Absolutely. Will there be stumbles, bad days? Without a doubt.   You can do this, you are doing this and you’re further along on your AF journey than you think. Keep moving forward.   [06:30] Paul introduces Rachel:   Rachel is 48 and lives just outside of Minneapolis, MN. She is married and they have three cats. She is a director in financial services and for fun she enjoys reading, writing and attending meet ups with other sober people.   Alcohol was always present when Rachel was growing up. She was an achiever in school and had already completed some college before graduating high school. Drinking was not a focus for her through her school years, and she didn’t start drinking until later in her life.   Around 2008 during the national financial crisis, Rachel says her drinking changed. Being a bond trader during this time was tough due to the uncertainty of the future. Rachel found herself having a drink after work and it became part of habit loop for her: go to work, come home, have a drink.  Over the next 7 to 10 years, that one drink turned into multiple bottles.   Rachel was desperate to figure out how to solve this issue without drinking and tried moderation with no luck. She began reading books like This Naked Mind and listening to podcasts like RE. She felt the stories on the podcast were relatable because they were normal people and not the stereotypical bum under a bridge with the brown paper bag.   After hearing suggestions of trying to quit for 30 days, Rachel decided to try it and has been sober ever since. She says the first three days were hard but within seven days she was sleeping better than she ever had. Rachel began substituting wine with sparkling water and while it was tough at first, it became her new habit. She also joined Café RE and found community there and in AA.   Rachel recently self-published a book called Functional: A High Performer's Guide to Achieving Freedom from Alcohol. She says she wrote a book that she wishes were available to her when she got sober. Many of the books out there have glaring rock bottom moments which Rachel said she didn’t have. She believes that it may sometimes be harder for people without a rock bottom to quit because it isn’t as obvious that they need to.   Rachel’s best advice to somebody that is functional is to just try to quit for 30 days and use it as a time of self-discovery.   Recovery Elevator It all starts from the inside out. I love you guys. We can do this.   Café RE – the social app for sober people RE on Instagram Recovery Elevator YouTube Sobriety Tracker iTunes       

Today we have Thea. She is 55 years old from Madison, WI and took her last drink on February 10th, 2019   This episode brought to you by: Better Help – 10% off of your first month #sponsored Exact Nature – 20% off your order with code RE20   We have just a couple of cabin spots left for our upcoming retreat in Bozeman, Montana. This retreat is from August 6th through 10th.   Coming in January 2026, our AF Ukelele Course. Registration for that opens in December.   Also coming next year in October 2026, we will have an in-person ukelele retreat where we’re having Spanish instruction in the afternoons. This will be in Costa Rica. More information will be coming soon about that event.   [02:45] Thoughts from Paul:   On the journey into an alcohol-free life, it almost always consists of a chapter where we are trying to control the uncontrollable. But something takes place that we aren’t aware of and that’s that alcohol has become uncontrollable – and we haven’t realized it yet.   You might be asking yourself if your drinking has reached that point and may have searched for a sobriety podcast because there were aspects of your drinking that you were unable to control. The longer you try to control the uncontrollable, the less sanity you are left with.   Paul wants you to ask yourself if you are trying to control the uncontrollable thing. He and many of us have learned that we cannot control our drinking, but the opportunities are endless in what we CAN do without alcohol in our lives, the same can be true for you.   [07:06] Paul introduces Thea:   Thea is 55 years old, grew up in a small town in Wisconsin but now lives in Madison with her husband of almost 30 years, and they have three grown boys. Thea works in education. She loves to cook, bake, read, and attend sporting events.   Thea says she drank a little in high school, but it wasn’t out of control. After going to college where the culture involved binge drinking, Thea drank more. Being someone that didn’t suffer from hangovers, she never looked at her drinking as a problem.   Thea met her husband after college when they married and had three kids. She says she would binge drink occasionally, but not enough to create red flags and her husband can take it or leave it. Thea says she didn’t drink during her pregnancies or drink every night, but as her kids got older and needed her less, she fell into the habit of drinking more.   Thea would drink socially but preferred to drink covertly at home where she could have as much as she wanted. Over time she began to feel like she needed the alcohol to function and was becoming physically addicted to it.   A few years later, some family members had an intervention with Thea. The message she took away was that she needed to hide her drinking better in the future. The following summer, Thea’s sister-in-law called her out on her drinking again, and they went to the ER. It was recommended that she go to a detox center which Thea refused to do. She opted to detox on her own, which is not recommended. After doing that, she enrolled in an IOP but was just going through the motions to try and become a normal drinker again – she had no intention of quitting.   Thea feels she was getting nudges from God to address the issue. It wasn’t until February 10th, 2019, that the message finally got through. Thea was very sick and throwing up blood. She was in and out of the hospital dealing with the symptoms of her failing liver. Thea feels that something finally clicked, and she has not wanted to have a drink since that first day when she went to the hospital.   After two years sober, Thea started listening to podcasts and reading quit lit. She eventually found her way back to AA and it feels like home this time. Thea is very open about her recovery with her family and is grateful they never gave up on her.   Recovery Elevator It all starts from the inside out. I love you guys.   RE on Instagram Recovery Elevator YouTube Sobriety Tracker iTunes  Café RE    

Today we have Ronnie. He is 41 years old from Kiowa, CO and took his last drink on June 1st, 2025.   This episode brought to you by: Better Help – 10% off of your first month #sponsored Café RE – the social app for sober people.   [03:17] Thoughts from Paul:   From the cavemen to the ancient Greeks, to modern humans, there’s always an apocalypse on the horizon. The apocalypse outside of us, we can’t control and there has never not been one. The only apocalypse you can control is the one caused by alcohol which is happening inside of you.   Paul reminds us that no matter how fearful the news programs and the politicians want you to be, we’ve never not had an external apocalypse looming and geological record will tell you the same.   Disconnect from all of the news and connect to yourself, others, nature, a ripe mango, a snuggle with a dog because you know what? We’re okay. Get yourself some time away from alcohol and you’re going to be very much okay.   [07:54] Paul introduces Ronnie:   Ronnie is 41 years old, lives in Kiowa, CO with his wife and four children. Ronnie works as a home inspector. For fun, Ronnie enjoys spending time with his kids and spending time outside. His family has 40 acres and a variety of animals which his children show with 4-H.   Ronnie began drinking when he was 17 after discovering that alcohol was a magical elixir that suppressed his inhibitions and insecurities. By the time Ronnie was in college, he was partying regularly. After a few semesters, he had failed out of school, moved back home and began working in construction.   After some time, Ronnie moved to Colorado and began working for a faith-based non-profit organization in addition to being a home inspector on the side. Drinking was something they did not allow their staff to do. This enabled Ronnie to remain mostly sober during that time, only drinking when he was around friends back home.   Ronnie and his wife married in 2011 and moved to Portland, Oregon. He grew accustomed to the culture of going out for cups of coffee, but when they returned to Colorado Ronnie saw that the culture there was going out for beers. This began alcohol creeping back into his life slowly.   When COVID happened, his job with the non-profit ended and Ronnie was home inspecting full time. Ronnie says they lost two and a half streams of income, and it left him depressed and having trouble with night terrors. He started using alcohol to help him sleep. It turned into daily drinking which led Ronnie to start exploring whether or not he had an issue. In the process, he discovered the RE podcast.   Around this time, Ronnie began to try moderation. He was using a sobriety tracker and said he reset it over 20 times before he was able to get a week. After he was able to stay sober for three weeks, he thought he had it under control but before long was back to drinking daily.   On that night of what ended up being Ronnie’s last drink, he awoke to his heart racing and massive anxiety. He told his wife that he thought he had a problem which she said she knew, and instead of being judgmental, she asked what she could do to help. The next day Ronnie learned that his wife had contacted some friends that had dealt with addictions, and they were all ready to help.   Within the first day, Ronnie threw out all of the alcohol in the home. This opened up the conversation with his kids about addictions and healthy ways of coping with emotions. Over the last 12 days, Ronnie has seen his sleep improved. He has realized that alcohol no longer has a place in his or his family’s life.   Ronnie says that every time he tells someone about his addiction, a weight lifts. This motivates him to keep going. He is finding healthy ways to deal with stress and sleep. Exercise, meditation, audiobooks and listening to the RE podcast have been helpful to him on this journey.   Recovery Elevator You took the elevator down, you gotta take the stairs back up We can do this I love you guys   RE on Instagram Recovery Elevator YouTube Sobriety Tracker iTunes       

Today we have Marcy. She’s 42 years old and lives in Seattle, WA. Marcy took her last drink on October 15th, 2020.   This episode brought to you by: Better Help – 10% off of your first month #sponsored Exact Nature – 20% off your order with code RE20   Paul just finished the rough draft of his second book entitled Dolce Vita, The Good Life and expects it to be released this September.   [00:00] Thoughts from Paul:   In a recent article presented on Newsbreak entitled Alcohol is Killing More Americans Today than 20 Years Ago, it shares that mortality from liver disease has increased significantly across most demographic groups in the US from 1999 to 2022. Death from liver disease went from 6.7 to 12.5 deaths per 100,000 people. The annual increase was higher among women than men, and young people showed “concerning trends”. And of course, minority populations are hit hardest.  American Indian and Alaska Native populations, faced the highest death rates. Those increased from about 25 to nearly 47 per 100,000 over the last 20 years.   While this podcast is supposed to be uplifting and positive it also has to be real. The spirit alcohol is claiming more lives than ever.   Remember last week’s episode titled The Quiet Revolution? You are part of the not so anonymous army that solves this... Your quitting drinking is the answer for everyone else who struggles with addiction. You're turning your gaze inward when people in charge are pointing their finger outward. You are the hero.   [00:00] Paul introduces Marcy:   Marcy is 42 years old and lives in Seattle, WA with her partner and their cat. She works at a production company as a creative producer and makes psychedelic music videos in her spare time. For fun, she enjoys the outdoors and says the Pacific Northwest is a beautiful place to be outside.   Marcy says she was a very shy kid with a lot of anxiety. She had her first drink when she was 16 and by 18, she had a fake ID and spent a lot of time in bars and drinking almost daily. Her drinking never looked normal, Marcy says.   Marcy had her first blackout at her bachelorette party in her mid-twenties. Those began to become normal for her which began to concern her. Marcy would tell everyone that she was quitting drinking but was never able to succeed.   Alcohol began to put a strain on Marcy’s marriage. She realized she needed to do something to fix it. She began to attend AA and tried to work the steps but was struggling with being honest with herself and others about her problem and continued to drink.   Marcy and her partner ended up divorcing, which sent her on a downward spiral since she no longer had anyone to be accountable to. After she was robbed one night, her parents talked her into going to inpatient rehab. She was supposed to stay for 30 days but only made it through 11 and decided to attend outpatient rehab instead. Marcy was able to fake her way through the outpatient program while she was still drinking.   From 2016 to 2019, Marcy says she was on a merry-go-round from hell. She would try to change, fail and then beat herself up. She returned to AA, found a sponsor and had a service position that helped her build a new routine. She made it to 30 days sober and then relapsed which sent her back into a cycle that Marcy says was worse than ever.   An extreme rock bottom found Marcy quitting again. After two months without drinking, a friend wanted Marcy to attend a meeting she was speaking at. This led Marcy to return to AA. She threw herself all-in and attended a meeting every day for the next year.   These days life for Marcy is mellow instead of chaotic. She says she has the capacity to explore her creativity, goes to work every day and enjoys yoga regularly. Her tools for dealing with anxiety are breathing and knowing her boundaries and limits.   Recovery Elevator You took the elevator down; you’ve got to take the stairs back up. We can do this.         RE on Instagram Recovery Elevator YouTube Sobriety Tracker iTunes       

Today we have Marisa. She is 50 years old from Fairfax, VA and she took her last drink on March 17th, 2024.   This episode brought to you by: Better Help – 10% off of your first month #sponsored Exact Nature – 20% off your order with code RE20   Check out the upcoming Recovery Elevator Events:   August 6th – 10th – Bozeman Retreat – we have about 12 spots left October 4th – 14th – Peru January 2026 – Restore And much more coming in 2026!   [03:18] Intro summary:   You may be listening right now and feeling tired. Not just sleepy tired, but soul tired. This kind of tiredness comes from trying to clean up your inner world while the outer world feels like it’s run by toddlers having the world’s most expensive tantrum.   You're choosing consciousness while others choose chaos. You're picking love while others are picking fights. You're building your spiritual muscles while they're flexing bank accounts and crypto wallets.   This is a contradiction that we are living in and it’s hard to be sober, raw, real and authentic in a dysfunctional world. However, the quiet revolution matters. The decision to face our demons instead of drowning them matters. The choice to feel everything instead of nothing matters. You're not just quitting drinking—you're quitting the lie that says we have to be drunk to survive this world.   Keep going. The world needs your consciousness more than it needs another unconscious knee jerk reaction. Ditching the booze and cleaning up your inner world is how we solve this mess.   [07:58] Paul introduces Marisa:   Marisa is 50 years old and lives in Fairfax, VA. She is engaged and has a 12-year-old daughter. She works as a government contractor, enjoys live music, spending time outside, traveling, reading and binge-watching TV.   Marisa says that for her, alcoholism was not a progressive disease. She had her first drink at 12 and the first time she got very drunk was 13 and she loved it. Alcohol assisted her in numbing the pain of abuse that she experienced in her childhood. Marisa has always known alcohol was a problem for her.   Over the next 30 or so years, there were ebbs and flows to Marisa’s drinking. She always had an excuse/reason that she chose to drink like she did. Because she was high functioning, no one really knew about her issues. When she started seeing a therapist in 2022, she told them about her drinking and says a weight was lifted. Marisa met with a substance abuse counselor a few times after that, but didn’t have a good experience and wasn’t ready to try AA again.   Marisa would try to moderate for the next few years but eventually knew something had to change. She told a friend of hers who she knew was in recovery that she had an intention of quitting for 30 days and began to attend AA.   Since quitting, Marisa says that she has never looked back. She knew that drinking was no longer serving her. Remembering the six-week spiral that she went through before quitting helps remind her of who and where she doesn’t want to ever be again.   Marisa knows she needs to stay tethered to her recovery through attending meetings, seeing her sponsor once a week, listening to podcasts and talking with other people in recovery often.  Marisa has gone to therapy for quite a while but wasn’t committed to it when she was drinking. Now she is doing the work and beginning to heal from the traumas that drove her to seek relief with alcohol.   Marisa’s parting piece of guidance: it was difficult to get sober, but it has been amazing and wonderful and easy to stay sober.   Recovery Elevator All of this change starts from the inside out. I love you guys.   RE on Instagram Recovery Elevator YouTube Sobriety Tracker iTunes       

Today we have Natalie. She is 55 years old from Palmdale, CA and took her last drink on June 4th, 2023.   This episode brought to you by: Better Help – 10% off of your first month #sponsored Café RE – THE social app for sober people   [02:28] Thoughts from Paul:   This week’s intro is about acceptance. We may wish we were a little bit taller, we may wish we were a baller, and we may wish that alcohol wasn’t marketed as being good for us when it’s a class one carcinogen. We may also wish that we could drink normally, but many of us cannot.   The thing about acceptance is that it is not about giving up, it’s about waking up to the fact that that’s just the way it is. When we finally stop wishing against reality and stop bleeding energy into a fantasy world of how things should be then we can start working with what actually is.   Acceptance is not about admitting defeat or giving up, it is acknowledging the truth which doesn’t care about your feelings, but it will set you free.   When you accept that alcohol isn’t your friend and that you can’t drink normally, that’s not rock bottom, that’s solid ground and something real to stand on. Life isn’t waiting for you to figure out how to drink responsibly. It’s waiting for you to square your shoulders and start accepting that you’re exactly where you are right now.   [07:36] Paul introduces Natalie:   Natalie is 55 years old and lives in Palmdale, CA. She says her most important job is being a mom to her autistic 15-year-old son. She enjoys spending time and going on adventures with him. Recently she has started volunteer work at a food bank and being of service in AA.   Natalie didn’t enjoy alcohol when she first tried it and says that she was mostly a social drinker for many years. In her mid-30’s, she sought help with her sleep issues. She was prescribed Ambien and really liked the idea that she could take something and check out quickly. Over time it progressed to where she was drinking and taking the drug. Natalie began to rely on Ambien more and more as she travelled frequently for work.   Life got very stressful for Natalie after her son turned two and they realized he didn’t have speech. That began a year of doctors, assessments and therapy and her reliance increased. Natalie would doctor shop to try and get more of the drug and resorted to her ordering it online and getting mass quantities in order to feed her habit.   Natalie started attending NA and after she had about 60 days, she received the diagnosis that her son was autistic.   When the COVID lockdown happened, she realized that she would have a hard time getting Ambien and she says that she changed from being an addict to an alcoholic. Natalie quickly became a daily drinker, often starting in the mornings. After her son was able to return to school, Natalie began a routine of dropping him off and then getting and drinking two bottles of wine before passing out until it was time to pick him up.   Moderation was something Natalie struggled with. Her husband we getting increasingly upset with her and she would make attempts for a few days to cut back. Her husband, who is a normal drinker, ended up quitting to try and help her make the decision to quit as well.   After a rock bottom trip in Las Vegas, Natalie decided it was time to quit. She found an AA meeting that she could attend right after dropping her son off at school. Natalie started attending daily and got a sponsor. She feels her relationships with family and friends has improved and even just day to day interactions with strangers are better.   Natalie says “when you leave the rooms of AA, there are people that you will never meet and that you do not know that will be better off for you having been in a meeting that morning. That their day and their life is actually better because you took care of yourself in that way.”       Recovery Elevator Rule 22. Let’s lighten up and not take ourselves too seriously. I love you guys.   RE on Instagram Recovery Elevator YouTube Sobriety Tracker iTunes       

Today we have Brooke. She is 47 years old from Pittsburgh, PA and took her last drink on September 27th, 2024.   This episode brought to you by: Better Help – 10% off of your first month #sponsored Sober Link – save 50% on a device   [02:02] Thoughts from Paul:   When we get asked why we are not drinking, Paul shares that we should be turning the question around and asking them why they ARE drinking.   We can ask them questions like why they are spending $12 on something that can erode their insides and leave them with a hangover the next day. Or ask them why they are drinking a Class 1 carcinogen and is linked to seven different kinds of cancer?   Or another direction to go with this “why aren’t you drinking” question is that you don’t have to explain yourself or justify anything to anyone. In fact, be the catalyst. Be the one that switches the question in your community. But don’t shame people. Don’t say it with an aggressive tone but say it with presence and say it with love.   This isn’t about shaming anyone and it’s definitely not about you being right and others being wrong, but it’s about reclaiming the narrative. When you flip the question, you give others permission to question the script they’ve been handed. You become part of the change simply by standing in your truth.   [07:19] Paul introduces Brooke:   Brooke is 47 and has lived in Pittsburgh for 23 years. She has been married for 25 years, and they have two young adult children ages 22 and 20. She works in a test kitchen. For fun, she has pets, loves to garden, and has property to horseback ride on.   Brooke was the youngest of three girls. She and her family moved around a lot because of her father’s work and when she was 13, they moved to California.   When she was 14, Brooke was groomed into a relationship with her volleyball coach that lasted for two years. There was alcohol involved in a lot of their relationship, Brooke says. Brooke grew tired of the secret relationship and wanted to be a normal teenager with friends her age.     Brooke got a DUI when she was 18 which derailed some plans she had for college. She didn’t think she had a drinking problem but learned not to drink and drive. Brooke got a job working for a ceramic studio and met her husband soon after. After they married, they moved to Pennsylvania where her husband was from and began a family.   Having a newborn and not having any friends in a new place proved tough on Brooke. She and her husband were normal drinkers prior to this, but Brooke began drinking wine almost every day. There were a few occasions when she would drink too much and conversations would be had about it, but over time they would be forgotten, and it would happen again.   Tired of the cycle she was in, Brooke decided to quit and go to AA meetings. She says she didn’t go enough to become part of the community and after three years just stopped going. Brooke remained sober for another year after that. One day she randomly decided to have a drink and concluded that she could be a normal drinker. It worked for a while, but the cycle eventually returned.   After a night when Brooke had to be walked home by a neighbor, her husband confronted her. Brooke knew that words weren’t going to work and that she needed to take action to get this under control. She has learned to accept that she cannot drink and lives in that truth.   In recovery Brooke has learned that she loves yoga. She has always been a fan of recovery podcasts and still listens to them frequently. Brooke hasn’t attended AA and says that she isn’t against it, but her life is full now.   Brooke’s parting piece of guidance: if you’re here listening, just stay curious.   Recovery Elevator You took the elevator down; you got to take the stairs back up. We can do this.   RE on Instagram Recovery Elevator YouTube Sobriety Tracker iTunes       

Today we have Kimmy. She is 34 years old from Montrose, Colorado and took her last drink on April 3rd, 2017.   This episode brought to you by Better Help – 10% off of your first month Café RE – THE social app for sober people   Here are some upcoming events at RE: Bozeman Retreat from August 6th-20th, 2025 Peru in October (registration closed) Dry January 2026 Ukelele Course in February 2026 Costa Rica in February 2026 AF Songwriting Course in March 2026   [04:12] Thoughts from Paul:   A few weeks ago, Paul did an intro titled “How to Let Go” and then told us that had no idea how to let go. Since that episode, he has started looking at this from another angle.   Paul shares that there was a time in his life that he would drink over things that he was unable to let go of. He says that progress has not been in letting things go, but it has been in his reactions to events and happenings in life.   When drinking everything was a knee jerk reaction with no space between the stimulus and the response. Recovery has taught him how to pause, to wait, to gather his thoughts before responding to an event or trigger.   One strategy with this is to not add a good or bad label to whatever happens in life. What seems like an unfortunate life event now may later turn out to be a great thing. Our reactions to life in general are the key to letting go. If we lean into the space between stimulus and response, and remain neutral to all of life’s unfolding, there will be less that needs to be let go of.   [08:59] Paul introduces Kimmy:   Kimmy grew up Big Fork, Montana and grew up riding horses and competing in barrel racing and rodeos. She says overall she had a good childhood.   Kimmy says that she had her first drink when she was 17 and feels that drinking was a problem for her right from the start. Several events that happened in her teens drove Kimmy to use alcohol to cope with her feelings around them. She would take shots of her mom’s liquor and then drive 30 minutes to school already drunk.   After leaving college, a friend of Kimmy’s said she was moving to Telluride for ski season. Kimmy went with her and while the friend left after the season was over, Kimmy stayed because she enjoyed it there.   After having multiple rock bottom moments, Kimmy tried different techniques to quit drinking or moderate. They all backfired, she says. Eventually she turned to her faith in a moment of surrender. She didn’t quit drinking instantly, but over time grew to see that alcohol was no longer doing anything for her.   Kimmy took her last drink at the end of the ski season in 2017. It was one beer, and she isn’t even sure she finished it. She was able to quit and after nine months told her father, who also drinks, and he was so proud of her she just wanted to keep going.   Kimmy says working has been a big part of her recovery as she currently has four jobs. She stays close to her faith and although she doesn’t attend church, she reads her bible frequently. Kimmy has goals now and shares that she didn’t really have any after getting derailed by some events in her teenage years and turning to alcohol. It has taken time, but Kimmy is getting back to riding and competing and sees this current year of sobriety as a year of redemption as she looks forward to improving in these endeavors.   Recovery Elevator It all starts from the inside out. I love you guys.   RE on Instagram Recovery Elevator YouTube Sobriety Tracker iTunes       

Today we have Santino. He is 37 years old from Taunton, MA and took his last drink on May 24th, 2022.   This episode brought to you by Better Help – 10% off of your first month Exact Nature use code RE20 to save 20% off your order   Recovery Elevator has merch! We have hoodies, patches, shirts, tank tops and bracelets. Help us keep this project going and shred the shame!   Last call for registration to our sober travel trip to Peru. Registration closes tomorrow June 3rd.   A study on the state of restaurants revealed that 40% of restaurants in 2025 plan to dedicate more space on their menus for alcohol-free drink offerings. And Door Dash reported an 82% jump in non-alcoholic beer orders in 2025 alone. Things are changing and they are changing fast!   [03:29] Thoughts from Paul:   On episode 527, Paul talked about how Gallitin County, Montana is the drunkest place in America. Ironically, this is where much of this podcast is recorded, and this is where Paul got sober. We are reminded that quitting drinking can happen wherever, whenever, regardless of how drunk we think our cities/counties/states are.   Recently Paul read in a newsletter about a local event that said, “come join us for a night of alcohol-free country line dancing, swing dancing and two step”. Paul reached out to the organization putting it on and they thanked him for his support and said that they believe that country, swing and line dancing shouldn’t be exclusive to bars.   We at Recovery Elevator couldn’t agree more. Rule 22 for the win!   [08:18] Paul introduces Santino:   This is Santino’s fourth appearance on the podcast. He first appeared on episode 397, and then returned for episodes 449 and 491.   Santino is 37 years old, has been married for 10 years and they have two children aged six and almost one. He is originally from the Midwest but currently lives in Massachusetts. Santino is currently working on writing a memoir regarding his childhood.   Drinking got out of control for Santino in his late twenties when he realized he was becoming a daily drinker. Trying to moderate didn’t work as the line in the sand got further and further away for him and he was drinking in isolation. Santino says before he could reconcile with the fact that he didn’t know how to stop, he had to first define what an alcoholic was.   Santino had dabbled in AA in the past while in active addiction as well as during a court order after a DUI. He never identified with it because he wasn’t ready to quit. After reconciling that he had a problem, he started going to AA regularly and participated in the meetings. Santino really resonated with the idea of a higher power.   The first six months into his recovery Santino says he struggled with shame. Coming to terms with his past is something that he knows he will be living with indefinitely.   Santino works in the addiction field and understands that relapses can be part of many people’s recovery. And while he feels that relapse isn’t a bad thing but is greatly stigmatized.   Santino says the most profound healing that took place when he stopped drinking was his perception of himself. He stopped putting so much stock into how other people viewed him.   To put his years of sobriety in terms of themes, Santino shares that the first year was “darkness” the second year was “climbing” and the third year so far has been “practice”.   Since Santino’s last interview he has welcomed his second son, continued to work on his relationships, still has the same job with the homeless and people with addictions, and working on being the best dad he can be to his two sons.   Santino’s parting piece of guidance: you have to treat sobriety like you would treat anything else delicate in your life. It requires carefulness, it requires mindfulness, but it also requires full vulnerability.   Recovery Elevator You took the elevator down. You have got to take the stairs back up. You can do this.   RE on Instagram Recovery Elevator YouTube Sobriety Tracker iTunes       

Today we have Jenny. She is 53 yeas old from Belgrade, MT and took her last drink on August 25th, 2015.   This episode brought to you by Better Help – 10% off of your first month   Exact Nature use code RE20 to save 20% off your order     The message that alcohol is good for you is outdated. Paul shares an article from GQ that was released shortly after the World Health Organization declared that no amount of alcohol is safe for you.   WELCOME to all our new listeners to the RE podcast!   [03:56] Thoughts from Paul:   In the interviews on this podcast, you’ve heard the word nature probably hundreds of times as a powerful tool to help overcome an addiction.   Today Paul shares with us a specific free tool that can enhance your experience in nature: the Merlin bird app.   There is science behind how birding can help you heal. Listening to birds reduces cortisol, slows your heart rate and triggers the parasympathetic nervous system which calms us.   The opposite of addiction is connection, and Paul shares that he feels a connection to some of his local birds. He encourages us to give birds a chance as they have the capacity to take our connection to nature to the next level.   [08:03] Paul introduces Jenny:   Jenny was originally a guest on episode 86.   Jenny lives in Belgrade, MT and says teaching fitness classes is her passion. She enjoys music, her chickens, playing golf and pickleball, and loves concerts and comedy as well.   Jenny had her first drink when she was just nine years old. Her parents drank socially and any time there was a party at their house, she and her brother or friends would sneak alcohol. In high school, she and her friends didn’t participate in activities, so they just drank and dabbled with marijuana and hallucinogens.   Jenny moved from Helena to Bozeman to attend college and it was then when the drinking and drug use ramped up. While working in a restaurant, Jenny says drinking after work was common, and she was later introduced to harder drugs which she used for several years.   Jenny quit the harder drugs but drinking remained. It ebbed and flowed after she got married and had kids. Her drinking escalated when her husband became a firefighter and would work very long shifts. This time was stressful for Jenny with multiple young children and battling postpartum anxiety. Over time Jenny would start drinking earlier in the day but felt she was very high functioning therefore didn’t see her drinking as a problem.   Jenny began to realize that her drinking was becoming an issue, but no one said anything to her, so she decided to quit on her own without telling anyone. She didn’t attend AA and just used exercise and podcasts to help her quit. It took a bit for others to notice, but she was confident in her decision in spite of them insisting that she didn’t have a problem.   In 2016, Jenny learned she had stage 2 breast cancer. She says that it was aggressively treated and once in remission, she didn’t know what to do with herself. She started running half marathons and decided to use her degree in exercise and wellness and started teaching exercise classes which she loves.   Recently, Jenny and her husband hit a rough patch, and they have been attending counseling. Their counselor told Jenny they thought she might be a dry drunk and suggested she start the AA program. Jenny says she needed to hear that and has recently began going to AA and has gotten a sponsor who she is about to tackle step work with. Jenny also has learned that she suffers from several different disorders that have given her a lot of “a-ha” moments about who she is.   Jenny shares her journey with the world now. She believes being our authentic selves is most important. Jenny has learned that she needs to protect her mental health and her sobriety above all.   Jenny’s parting piece of guidance: listen to that inner voice.   Recovery Elevator We took the elevator down, we gotta take the stairs back up. I love you guys.   RE on Instagram RE merch Recovery Elevator YouTube Sobriety Tracker iTunes       

Today we have Kayleen. She is 27 years old, lives in Baltimore, MD and she took her last drink on April 6th, 2025.   Sponsors for this episode include: Better Help – 10% off of your first month Café RE – the social app for sober people   There are a few spots left for Peru in October 2025. On this 10-night, 11-day trip of a lifetime, we will be hiking the Inca Trail and participating in two service projects. Registration closes in about three weeks.   [02:35] Thoughts from Paul:   There is so much speak in the recovery world about letting go. In recovery meetings, many of the topics are centered around letting go.   Paul shares that he has spent years thinking he needed to figure out HOW to let go. Like there was a secret technique that was missing. In fact, all you can do is realize you’re holding on and this awareness is the first real step towards letting the sunshine in. Once you realize you are holding on, or bring awareness to something weighing you town, it immediately begins to shift on its own, and you don’t have to let it go.   Another thought is that it’s not even about letting GO, it’s more about letting IN. If something is nagging you, don’t let it go, let it in. It will eventually leave on it’s own, when the time is right, when it’s resolved.   Paul encourages us to have the strength to see where you’re holding on and then invite it in a little more.   [09:23] Paul introduces Kayleen:   Kayleen is 27, lives in Baltimore, and works as a server in a fine dining restaurant. She enjoys walking, being in nature, painting and going to Café RE meetings.   Kayleen says she never drank normally. She recalls being in ninth grade and taking swigs of liquor from her mom’s cabinet before getting on the school bus in the morning. Looking back, she thinks that she was always looking to escape her feelings.   In college, Kayleen didn’t go to parties and drink with others. She preferred to drink at home and didn’t want anyone to know how much or how often she was drinking. She would frequently drink before going to class and eventually was suspended from the university.     Kayleen was sent to detox three times in college for her drinking and self-harm. She wasn’t ready to quit drinking and would start back as soon as she got out. When she was 21, she was arrested twice for DUIs, and she wasn’t willing to stop drinking.   A year later Kayleen was married and their relationship revolved around alcohol where they drank together daily. Over the next three years Kayleen gained over 100 pounds, and her mobility was suffering. A doctor told her that due to her poor health, she might not see age 30. For Kayleen, the idea of quitting drinking didn’t feel like a possibility.   In April of 2023, Kayleen discovered the RE podcast. Within a month of listening frequently, Kayleen decided to quit drinking on May 25th – just for that one day. She woke up feeling so proud of herself she kept going. A few months later she joined Café RE and found community.   Kayleen began walking and ended up losing 60 pounds in the first year of sobriety. Her wife had quit drinking too, but that wasn’t enough to save the marriage. Kayleen ended up divorcing her wife and moved from Indiana to Baltimore to stay with her accountability partner that she met through Café RE.   In April of this year, Kayleen’s sister got married and it was at the wedding that she relapsed. She said within a day she was drinking just like she was before quitting and quickly turned to her community for help. Kayleen says she decided to quickly shred the shame and make sure she didn’t get stuck in a “woe is me” place. The community lifted her up and helped her realize that she didn’t lose her sobriety time and Kayleen shares that she learned a lot from the experience.   Kayleen’s parting piece of guidance: Just keep trying. Never, never, never give up on yourself.   Recovery Elevator You took the elevator down, you gotta take the stairs back up. We can do this.   RE on Instagram RE merch Recovery Elevator YouTube Sobriety Tracker iTunes       

Today we have Ben. He is 45 years old from Liverpool, UK and had his last drink on September 26th, 2021.   Sponsors for this episode include: Better Help – 10% off of your first month Sober Link - $50 off of device using this link   [02:01] Thoughts from Paul:   According to Stanford neuroscientist Andrew Huberman, all health, longevity, and your daily moods, along with your overall state of being, is tied to the quality of your sleep. When you drink alcohol, the quality of your sleep drastically diminishes, leaving you in a state of disrepair the following day.   Paul shares many examples of how poor sleep affects our bodily functions and how drinking even small amounts of alcohol adds fuel to that fire.   When we remove alcohol and we begin entering deep sleep cycles again, all of these negative consequences of poor sleep start to disappear. It may not happen in one night but within time, trust the body and this function will return to normal.   [09:22] Paul introduces Ben:   Ben was a previous guest on Episode 364.   Ben started drinking when he was 14. It was tied into music and his social life. Alcohol and music helped him to escape the strife that he was having at school with bullies and being different than everyone else.   Drinking was a huge part of his rock and roll lifestyle. Drinking with bandmates while writing music, going out after practice and drinking after performances were all part of the landscape for Ben in his early 20s. This continued and progressed over the next decade.   Towards the end of his 30s, Ben says things started to get really dark for him. He found himself just wanting to drink on the tour bus and be left alone. The days of wanting to drink to socialize and be connected were gone for him.   When he realized his drinking was becoming an issue, Ben tried to stop for periods of time. Later on, to create accountability Ben would make pacts with his brother where if he drank on one of his 30-day breaks, his brother could sell Ben’s guitar. The idea of stopping completely was unthinkable to Ben at the time.   After a situation where Ben almost lost all of his musical equipment at the end of a tour, he started to look into AA. It was recommended to him by someone he knew who had gotten sober. He was a bit dubious of it because he thought AA was only for people that had a problem. When Ben first spoke at the meeting he thought he might end up making light of his story but found himself crying instead and made the statement that he was scared that if he never drank again, that there would be nothing for him to look forward to for the rest of his life.   Throughout 2020 and 2021, Ben would find himself having two day drinking binges nearly every week. He had just gotten an apartment without housemates or family for the first time and had no one he had to be accountable to. The fact that his job wasn’t 9-5 gave him a lot of free time. The moderation techniques began again because he wasn’t ready to believe he had to quit entirely.   After a few rock bottom incidents, Ben finally made the decision to stop. In the first few months he used a variety of tools including harm reduction. He allowed himself to play video games again and eat food that he had always denied himself while drinking. When he reached out to be on the podcast the first time, he utilized that as motivation to stay sober at least until the interview a few months later.   Year one of sobriety found Ben still having cravings and just getting used to life being sober but says years two and three found him celebrating personal and professional successes. He says life can still be complicated at times but has learned to use obstacles as opportunities. Meditation has been a powerful tool for Ben in his recovery in addition to journalling, limiting his phone usage, reading and exercise.   Recovery Elevator You took the elevator down, you gotta take the stairs back up. I love you guys.   RE on Instagram Café RE RE merch Recovery Elevator YouTube Sobriety Tracker iTunes       

Today we have Christopher. He is 27 years old from Melbourne, Australia and he took his last drink on July 13th, 2019.   Sponsors for this episode include: Better Help – 10% off of your first month   On October 4th-15th, we are going to Peru!  There are still three spots available for this 11-day 12-night journey throughout Cusco, Machu Picchu and the Sacred Valley. Included in this journey are hiking the Inca Trail and a service project with Peruvian Hearts.   [02:38] Thoughts from Paul:   Today Paul presents the third of a three-part series where he covers the healing one may expect in the first year away from alcohol. This week he covers the spiritual (not necessarily religious) component of healing and what can generally be expected over the course of the first year away from alcohol.   Spiritual growth isn’t necessarily linear and likely won’t start in the first week. There may have been a moment before your last drink when time seemed to stop, and you were pulled into the present moment where you could see where things were headed if you didn’t quit drinking.   For some this growth may involve religious exploration and for others it may just be feeling the pull to be in nature or seeing life synchronicities and being able to decipher signals of intuition in your body. Creativity may return and books like Julia Cameron’s The Artist’s Way can help unblock creative channels.   Paul shares many different ways spiritual healing can show up for people on the journey to being alcohol-free.   [09:28] Paul introduces Christopher:   Chris is 27 and lives in Melbourne, Australia. He is about to start being a psychologist in a few weeks where he looks forward to being of service, but currently is working in the restaurant area of a pub. For fun he enjoys the outdoors, running, hiking and is a fan of philosophy.   Chris’ drinking began like many others when he was in his teens. He says he instantly felt free, and his problems slipped away. He drank when the opportunities arose, and it was mainly binge drinking on the weekends.   Chris said he cared a lot of what others thought of him or if they found him interesting, so he began to believe that he had to drink in order to please them. This led to an escalation in his drinking and not long after he began to question his it but didn’t feel like it was an addiction. He kept himself busy to avoid dealing with those thoughts. When Chris was 19 or 20, he was going into another semester at school and was exhausted. He decided to take this time to quit alcohol and drugs. He found himself thinking about alcohol a lot during this time and began to explore what this meant to him. Chris didn’t want to share with anyone what he was doing so kept it to himself.   After the three-month break, Chris went back to drinking and it wasn’t the same. He realized that alcohol had been ruined for him. He was drinking just because he was terrified of the alternative but eventually decided to quit and this time shared his intention with others.   In spite of having multiple years away from alcohol, Chris didn’t feel completely sober. He recently began to prioritize his sobriety and utilize more resources in his recovery. He was listening to the RE podcast but also became more active in Café RE and started going to AA meetings and getting a sponsor. Realizing that he couldn’t do it alone was a big revelation for Chris. He says that prioritizing his sobriety is the most important component to having control over the rest of his life.   Christopher’s parting piece of guidance: “do what’s right for you. Your truth is your truth and there is going to be a lot of outside noise, but you probably know what is going on deep down better than you realize.”     Recovery Elevator Go big, because eventually we’ll all go home. I love you guys.   RE on Instagram Café RE RE merch Recovery Elevator YouTube Sobriety Tracker iTunes