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Relationship Advice

Author: Chase & Sarah Kosterlitz

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I Do Podcast interviews today’s most successful and inspiring relationship experts, therapists and couples. Hosted by Chase and Sarah Kosterlitz, I Do Podcast is all about inspiring young couples to create a fulfilling and happy relationship. Our weekly podcast will give you great advice to improve your relationship and fun ways to keep the spark alive. Each episode we will interview amazing relationship experts who share their knowledge on building successful and lasting love. Our guests will provide daily tips to improve your relationship, advice for young couples, amazing books and resources and much more. Join us on our journey to create lasting love!
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Relationship partners and friends can offer valuable support for managing stress and anxiety in our lives. However, sometimes relying on others to manage our emotions can create negative effects in our lives and relationships. Listen to today's show to learn how to balance this sometimes complicated dynamic.    In this episode, we discuss relationship advice topics that include: Understanding if you are automatically pulling in a third person to help manage your relationship anxiety The negative effects of relying too much on others How to sit with your own anxiety before projecting it onto others Writing things down to help process your problems Becoming curious about how you function when you become anxious And much more! Dr. Kathleen Smith is a licensed therapist and mental health writer who lives in Washington, DC. She is the author of the new book, Everything Isn't Terrible: Conquer Your Insecurities, Interrupt Your Anxiety, and Finally Calm Down. She is an associate faculty member at the Bowen Center for the Study of the Family and hosts the show Family Matters, a production of the University of the District of Columbia. Full show notes and episode links at: https://idopodcast.com/237 Sign up for our 14 Day Happy Couples Challenge here: 14 Day Happy Couples Challenge Join our 5 Day Couples Appreciation Challenge here: idopodcast.com/appreciation Do you want to hear more on this topic? Continue the conversation on our Facebook Group here: Love Tribe Sponsors BetterHelp:Get help on your own time and at your own pace. Get 10% off your first month by visiting BetterHelp.com/IDO. Spark My Relationship Course: For a limited time, get access to our bonus, Mastering Money Talk In Your Marriage! Visit SparkMyRelationship.com/Unlock for our special offer just for our I Do Podcast listeners! If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a review in iTunes? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Chase & Sarah
When host Nikki Boyer’s best friend Molly is diagnosed with Stage IV breast cancer, she decides to do something bold. She leaves an unhappy marriage and embarks on a series of sexual adventures to feel alive. Over this six-part miniseries, Molly shares the details of her hilarious escapades in a story about friendship, death, and what you do with the time you have left. From Wondery, the creators of Dirty John and The Moment comes Dying For Sex. Listen now at https://wondery.fm/DFS20.
What if we told you that a woman is capable of having an hour-long orgasm? Sounds too good to be true right!? Well, there are techniques that can make this happen. Listen to today's show to learn about the expanded orgasm practice and its benefits for both men and women. In this episode, we discuss relationship advice topics that include: The practice of expanded orgasm and how to begin your journey to become an erotic master Spirituality and expanded orgasm as meditation Meaning making through sexual experience with your partner The value of no male expectation for sexual reciprocity And much more! Susan Bratton is an advocate and champion of all who desire passionate intimacy. She is a best-selling author of 34 books and online programs that teach passionate lovemaking, bedroom communication skills and restorative sexual wellness techniques. Full show notes and episode links at: https://idopodcast.com/236 Sign up for our 14 Day Happy Couples Challenge here: 14 Day Happy Couples Challenge Join our 5 Day Couples Appreciation Challenge here: idopodcast.com/appreciation Do you want to hear more on this topic? Continue the conversation on our Facebook Group here: Love Tribe Sponsors BetterHelp:Get help on your own time and at your own pace. Get 10% off your first month by visiting BetterHelp.com/IDO. Spark My Relationship Course: For a limited time, get access to our bonus, Mastering Money Talk In Your Marriage! Visit SparkMyRelationship.com/Unlock for our special offer just for our I Do Podcast listeners! If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a review in iTunes? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Chase & Sarah
Want to feel empowered? How about realizing that YOU have the power to create the relationship of your dreams and find your own happiness. Many of us look to our partners to make us happy in our relationships. Listen to today's show to understand why that's the wrong approach and how to switch that mindset. In this episode, we discuss relationship advice topics that include: Getting rid of the expectation that our partner will make us happy Self reflection practices to understand your contribution to creating conflict Realizing that relationship issues don't always get solved Using conflict for growth in your relationship Developing positive characteristics in yourself And much more! As an author and public speaker with 40 years of experience in psychotherapy, Larry Shushansky has written a book called Independent Enough and is looking to share his theory with as many people as possible. Larry turns his theories on relationships into achievable day-to-day practices for his audiences through engaging, conversational-style presentations. Full show notes and episode links at: https://idopodcast.com/235 Sign up for our 14 Day Happy Couples Challenge here: 14 Day Happy Couples Challenge Join our 5 Day Couples Appreciation Challenge here: idopodcast.com/appreciation Do you want to hear more on this topic? Continue the conversation on our Facebook Group here: Love Tribe Sponsors BetterHelp:Get help on your own time and at your own pace. Get 10% off your first month by visiting BetterHelp.com/IDO. Baked By Melissa: This Valentine’s Day, send your loved ones the perfect gift - Baked by Melissa. Go to BakedByMelissa.com/ido and use promo code IDO to get 15% off your order! Spark My Relationship Course: For a limited time, get access to our bonus, Mastering Money Talk In Your Marriage! Visit SparkMyRelationship.com/Unlock for our special offer just for our I Do Podcast listeners! If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a review in iTunes? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Chase & Sarah
The brain — Sometimes we take it for granted, and don't realize its importance as an organ in shaping our relationships. The better we understand and take care of our brain, the better chance we'll have for relationship success. Listen to today's show to learn how to optimize your brain for a better relationship. In this episode, we discuss relationship advice topics that include: Understanding our brains drive our behavior How to optimize brain health through nutrition, movement, sleep and breath The importance of play as an adult in relationship How to avoid 'fight or flight communication' And much more! Dave Kenney is the Co-Founder and Executive Director at Emergo Recovery, along with Susan Kenney, who is the Co-Founder and Director of Therapeutic Wellness at Emergo Recovery. Emergo Recovery is a private, residential recovery and wellness center focused on a brain-first approach. Full show notes and episode links at: https://idopodcast.com/234 Sign up for our 14 Day Happy Couples Challenge here: 14 Day Happy Couples Challenge Join our 5 Day Couples Appreciation Challenge here: idopodcast.com/appreciation Do you want to hear more on this topic? Continue the conversation on our Facebook Group here: Love Tribe Sponsors Native creates safe, simple, effective products that people use in the bathroom everyday, including some amazing deodorant! For 20% off your first purchase, visit nativedeodorant.com and use promo code IDO20 during checkout! Spark My Relationship Course: For a limited time, get access to our bonus, Mastering Money Talk In Your Marriage! Visit SparkMyRelationship.com/Unlock for our special offer just for our I Do Podcast listeners! If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a review in iTunes? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Chase & Sarah
Do you feel like you're constantly on the receiving end of your partner's emotions? In relationships we want to be emotionally available for our partners and maintain healthy communication. However, sometimes emotional boundaries need to be set to help protect your personal mental health and to benefit your relationship. Listen to today's episode to learn how to set healthy emotional boundaries. In this episode, we discuss relationship advice topics that include: Learn why 'keeping the peace' by not standing up for yourself can lead to unhealthy relationship dynamics Pausing to understand what it is that you really need for yourself and for the relationship Is there such a thing as over communication in relationships? Understanding that you don't always need to accommodate your partner's needs Why conflict is OK in your relationship and how to better navigate it And much more! Dana McNeil is a Licensed Marriage and Family therapist and is the founder of a group practice called The Relationship Place located in San Diego, California. Dana’s practice specializes in couples’ therapy and utilizes an evidence-based type of couples’ therapy which is known as the Gottman Method. Full show notes and episode links at: https://idopodcast.com/233 Sign up for our 14 Day Happy Couples Challenge here: 14 Day Happy Couples Challenge Join our 5 Day Couples Appreciation Challenge here: idopodcast.com/appreciation Do you want to hear more on this topic? Continue the conversation on our Facebook Group here: Love Tribe Sponsors BetterHelp:Get help on your own time and at your own pace. Get 10% off your first month by visiting BetterHelp.com/IDO. Zola: Zola makes wedding planning so much easier and less stressful with their wedding websites, registry, invites, and a guest list manager all in one place. Sign up at Zola.com/IDO today to get your FREE personalized paper sample. Then use code SAVE50 to get 50% off your save the dates. Spark My Relationship Course: For a limited time, get access to our bonus, Mastering Money Talk In Your Marriage! Visit SparkMyRelationship.com/Unlock for our special offer just for our I Do Podcast listeners! If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a review in iTunes? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Chase & Sarah
The best estimates are that 1 in 5 people have participated in some kind of non-monogamous relationship. These kinds of relationship structures are gaining wider awareness and acceptance in today's society. Learning about non-monogamy can be valuable whether it's appealing to you or not. Listen to today's show to learn all about non-monogamy and open relationships! In this episode, we discuss relationship advice topics that include: Understanding the different forms of non-monogamy Polyamory vs swinging vs open relationships Why debating whether non-monogamy or monogamy is most 'natural' is unproductive How to talk to your partner about non-monogamy Questions to ask yourself if you want to be non-monogamous Importance of educating yourself before you start non-monogamy Time management in open relationships New relationship energy and what it can do for you And much more! Jase Lindgren is a non-monogamous dating coach, healthy masculinity educator and sex-positivity advocate. He has trained in positive psychology, Emotional Freedom Technique, consent education, and Buddhist mindfulness practice. He has worked with the government and celebrities on HIV public awareness in Russia, is a long-time fan of podcasts. As one of the hosts of the Multiamory podcasts he enjoys teaching people how to suck less at communication and grow in their relationships, especially the one with themselves. Full show notes and episode links at: https://idopodcast.com/232 Sign up for our 14 Day Happy Couples Challenge here: 14 Day Happy Couples Challenge Join our 5 Day Couples Appreciation Challenge here: idopodcast.com/appreciation Do you want to hear more on this topic? Continue the conversation on our Facebook Group here: Love Tribe Sponsors Native creates safe, simple, effective products that people use in the bathroom everyday, including some amazing deodorant! For 20% off your first purchase, visit nativedeodorant.com and use promo code IDO during checkout! Atlantis: Dreaming of a Bahamas destination wedding? Visit atlantisbahamas.com and mention "I Do Podcast" to receive the best room rates and up to 10% off your wedding package. Spark My Relationship Course: For a limited time, get access to our bonus, Mastering Money Talk In Your Marriage! Visit SparkMyRelationship.com/Unlock for our special offer just for our I Do Podcast listeners! If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a review in iTunes? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Chase & Sarah
Attention men and women! Do you know the menstrual cycle and how hormones ebb and flow throughout this 4 week time period? Maybe your answer is yes. But, if you're like us, the answer is no. Even if you do know the details of hormone changes and how that affects a woman's body and brain, do you know your own or your partners exact day on the cycle right now? Knowing all of this information can be incredibly helpful for relationships! Listen to today's episode to learn why and how to keep track of the cycle. The importance of understanding the entire span of the menstrual cycle How each week of the cycle is different and what mood changes to expect during each one Which weeks women are more likely to have a higher libido Men's 24-hour hormone cycle Apps to help both men and women in relationship track the menstrual cycle And much more! Gabrielle Lichterman is the founder of Hormonology, creator of the Hormone Horoscope App for women and Female Forecaster App for men, and author of 28 Days: What Your Cycle Reveals About Your Moods, Health & Potential. Full show notes and episode links at: https://idopodcast.com/231 Sign up for our 14 Day Happy Couples Challenge here: 14 Day Happy Couples Challenge Join our 5 Day Couples Appreciation Challenge here: idopodcast.com/appreciation Do you want to hear more on this topic? Continue the conversation on our Facebook Group here: Love Tribe Sponsors BetterHelp:Get help on your own time and at your own pace. Get 10% off your first month by visiting BetterHelp.com/IDO. Zola: Zola makes wedding planning so much easier and less stressful with their wedding websites, registry, invites, and a guest list manager all in one place. Sign up at Zola.com/IDO today to get your FREE personalized paper sample. Then use code SAVE50 to get 50% off your save the dates. Spark My Relationship Course: For a limited time, get access to our bonus, Mastering Money Talk In Your Marriage! Visit SparkMyRelationship.com/Unlock for our special offer just for our I Do Podcast listeners! If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a review in iTunes? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Chase & Sarah
Let's face it, being in a relationship is HARD WORK! Long term relationships are even harder. It's not a walk in the park to live with the same person for years and communicate, love, fornicate and just live a life. The more tools you have to continually do the work on your journey, the more successful and happy you'll be in your long term relationship. Listen to today's episode to learn how to avoid long term relationship fatigue. In this episode, we discuss relationship advice topics that include: The importance of keeping your expectations in check What to do when one partner is a 'seeker' Cultural myths surrounding marriage and the importance of recognizing them Letting go and accepting the humanity of ourselves and our partner The importance of realizing your partner will not be your everything Avoiding criticism of the same thing in your partner over and over And much more! Josh Gressel, Ph.D, is a clinical psychologist and couple’s counselor in private practice with over 32 years experience. He has also been married 38 years. He is the author of Embracing Envy: Finding the Spiritual Treasure in Our Most Shameful Emotion and has just finished a new book on masculinity. Full show notes and episode links at: https://idopodcast.com/230 Sign up for our 14 Day Happy Couples Challenge here: 14 Day Happy Couples Challenge Join our 5 Day Couples Appreciation Challenge here: idopodcast.com/appreciation Do you want to hear more on this topic? Continue the conversation on our Facebook Group here: Love Tribe Sponsors Plan to Eat: Simplify your life using our recipe clipper, meal planning calendar and automated grocery shopping list maker. Visit plantoeat.com/ido and get 50% off your subscription and start a free 60-day trial. Atlantis: Dreaming of a Bahamas destination wedding? Visit atlantisbahamas.com and mention "I Do Podcast" to receive the best room rates and up to 10% off your wedding package. Spark My Relationship Course: For a limited time, get access to our bonus, Mastering Money Talk In Your Marriage! Visit SparkMyRelationship.com/Unlock for our special offer just for our I Do Podcast listeners! If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a review in iTunes? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Chase & Sarah
Trying to conceive with your partner is a big deal. The process of baby making can be fun, but it can also be very stressful on the relationship. Listen to today's episode to learn the best ways to approach the process through both western and Chinese medicine perspectives. In this episode, we discuss relationship advice topics that include: How to avoid conceiving as a job and take the pressure off both partners Taking care of your body in preparation for conceiving How to have deep and honest communication about the process Using Chinese medicine for conceiving and lifestyle improvement Timing of sex when trying to conceive And much more! Denise Wiesner, LAc, FABORM, founder of the Natural Healing and Acupuncture Clinic in West Los Angeles, is an internationally recognized traditional Chinese medicine practitioner, specializing in the Whole Systems Chinese medicine approach to women’s health, sexuality, and fertility and author of the new book Conceiving with Love: A Whole-Body Approach to Creating Intimacy, Reigniting Passion, and Increasing Fertility. Full show notes and episode links at: https://idopodcast.com/229 Sign up for our 14 Day Happy Couples Challenge here: 14 Day Happy Couples Challenge Join our 5 Day Couples Appreciation Challenge here: idopodcast.com/appreciation Do you want to hear more on this topic? Continue the conversation on our Facebook Group here: Love Tribe Sponsors Pill Club: Birth control that actually gives you control. Get the care that you deserve. Visit thepillclub.com/ido to get your first birth control care package. BetterHelp: Get help on your own time and at your own pace. Get 10% off your first month by visiting BetterHelp.com/IDO. Spark My Relationship Course: For a limited time, get access to our bonus, Mastering Money Talk In Your Marriage! Visit SparkMyRelationship.com/Unlock for our special offer just for our I Do Podcast listeners! If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a review in iTunes? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Chase & Sarah
When was the last time you experienced ecstasy? This feeling is fundamental to being human, and yet we don't get it nearly enough — if at all in our lives. You don't have to use psychedelic medicine, although they can be a viable choice, to have an ecstatic experience. Listen to today's show to learn other ways to produce ecstatic experiences, and how they can produce profound impacts on your relationship. In this episode, we discuss relationship advice topics that include: Exploring the mind-body connection through ecstatic dance practices Psychedelic research and it's application to improving relationships Holotropic breathework and how it can produce ecstasy How eastern practices are penetrating western society and how we can benefit from them How to get unstuck when you feel stuck And much more! Alex Belser, Ph.D., is a Clinical Research Fellow and therapy supervisor at Yale University.  At Yale he is a Co-Investigator of two trials exploring psilocybin-treatment for OCD and depression.  He also teachers in the master's program in the Department of Applied Psychology at New York University.  He previously studied at Columbia University, Georgetown University, and Cambridge University. Full show notes and episode links at: http://idopodcast.com/228 Sign up for our 14 Day Happy Couples Challenge here: 14 Day Happy Couples Challenge Join our 5 Day Couples Appreciation Challenge here: idopodcast.com/appreciation Do you want to hear more on this topic? Continue the conversation on our Facebook Group here: Love Tribe Sponsors Zola: Zola is the wedding company that will do anything for love. They are reinventing the wedding planning and registry experience to make the happiest moment in our couples’ lives even happier. To get 30% off your invites and paper order visit ZOLA.com/ido. Plan to Eat: Simplify your life using our recipe clipper, meal planning calendar and automated grocery shopping list maker. Visit plantoeat.com/ido and get 50% off your subscription and start a free 60-day trial. Spark My Relationship Course: For a limited time, get access to our bonus, Mastering Money Talk In Your Marriage! Visit SparkMyRelationship.com/Unlock for our special offer just for our I Do Podcast listeners! If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a review in iTunes? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Chase & Sarah
Mindfulness is having a much deserved moment in the world of podcasting and popular culture. Learning how to bring mindfulness into the bedroom is a skill that can improve your relationship and sex life — something most of us can benefit from. Learn how to get off without checking out in today's episode. In this episode, we discuss relationship advice topics that include: Learn how to get out of a state of fear and judgement around sex in your relationship How to bring attention to what feels good during sex and communicating this with your partner Becoming more embodied and familiar with our sensuality Loving and accepting your own body Micro-practices for more sexuality in your life Asking for what you want in bed And much more! Jessica Graham is a meditation teacher, sex, relationship and spiritual guide for couples and individuals, speaker and author of Good Sex: Getting Off Without Checking Out. She is a contributing editor of the meditation blog, Deconstructing Yourself and co-founded The Eastside Mindfulness Collective. Jessica also founded Wild Awakening, to help people become more human through psycho-spiritual evolution using meditation and self-inquiry. Jessica is also an award-winning actor and filmmaker. Full show notes and episode links at: http://idopodcast.com/227 Sign up for our 14 Day Happy Couples Challenge here: 14 Day Happy Couples Challenge Join our 5 Day Couples Appreciation Challenge here: idopodcast.com/appreciation Do you want to hear more on this topic? Continue the conversation on our Facebook Group here: Love Tribe Sponsors Native creates safe, simple, effective products that people use in the bathroom everyday, including some amazing deodorant! For 20% off your first purchase, visit nativedeodorant.com and use promo code IDO during checkout! Away: Luggage for the modern traveler—lightweight, premium features, and a lifetime warranty. For $20 off a suitcase, visit awaytravel.com/IDO and use promo code IDO during checkout. Spark My Relationship Course: For a limited time, get access to our bonus, Mastering Money Talk In Your Marriage! Visit SparkMyRelationship.com/Unlock for our special offer just for our I Do Podcast listeners! If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a review in iTunes? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Chase & Sarah
Have you ever had a 'gut feeling' about something? This feeling can also be know as our intuition or inner self. Listening to our intuition can help us make better decisions and improve our relationships. Listen to today's show to learn how to tap into your intuition. In this episode, we discuss relationship advice topics that include: How the noise of modern life blocks out our intuition Learning from our mistakes and listening to our intuition How to get out of our minds and thinking about the past Listening to your intuition to improve your relationship Tools to improve your ability to tap into your intuition And much more! Victoria Shaw is a psychologist and licensed professional counselor who combines her training in counseling and psychology with her intuitive gifts. Victoria specializes in working with highly intuitive, empathic and sensitive souls to help them leverage their gifts and maximize their potential. Full show notes and episode links at: http://idopodcast.com/226 Sign up for our 14 Day Happy Couples Challenge here: 14 Day Happy Couples Challenge Join our 5 Day Couples Appreciation Challenge here: idopodcast.com/appreciation Do you want to hear more on this topic? Continue the conversation on our Facebook Group here: Love Tribe Sponsors Plan to Eat: Simplify your life using our recipe clipper, meal planning calendar and automated grocery shopping list maker. Visit plantoeat.com/ido you can start a free 60-day trial. Pill Club: Birth control that actually gives you control. Get the care that you deserve. Visit thepillclub.com/ido to get your first birth control care package. Spark My Relationship Course: For a limited time, get access to our bonus, Mastering Money Talk In Your Marriage! Visit SparkMyRelationship.com/Unlock for our special offer just for our I Do Podcast listeners! If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a review in iTunes? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Chase & Sarah
Today's cultural narratives have significant impacts on how we view ourselves, our relationships and gender roles. Listen to today's show to understand how culture may be influencing the male narrative and what that can mean for men and women alike. In this episode, we discuss relationship advice topics that include: Male dominance throughout history and how that has changed and impacted relationships The impact that narratives around male sexuality have on both men and women Setting the conditions to cultivate desire in your relationship Stephen's myths of modern male and female sexuality Understanding you don't have to 'be' something in particular according to what culture tells you And much more! Dr. Stephen Snyder is a sex and relationship therapist in Manhattan, and author of the award-winning new book, "Love Worth Making: How to Have Ridiculously Great Sex in a Long Lasting Relationship," and host of the “Relationship Doctor” podcast on Macmillan Publishers’ QDT Network. He's a regular contributor to Huffington Post, Psychology Today, and The Times of London, and a frequent guest on national media. Full show notes and episode links at: http://idopodcast.com/225 Sign up for our 14 Day Happy Couples Challenge here: 14 Day Happy Couples Challenge Join our 5 Day Couples Appreciation Challenge here: idopodcast.com/appreciation Do you want to hear more on this topic? Continue the conversation on our Facebook Group here: Love Tribe Sponsors Plan to Eat: Simplify your life using our recipe clipper, meal planning calendar and automated grocery shopping list maker. Visit plantoeat.com/ido and get 50% off your subscription and start a free 60-day trial. BetterHelp: Get help on your own time and at your own pace. Get 10% off your first month by visiting BetterHelp.com/IDO. Spark My Relationship Course: For a limited time, get access to our bonus, Mastering Money Talk In Your Marriage! Visit SparkMyRelationship.com/Unlock for our special offer just for our I Do Podcast listeners! If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a review in iTunes? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Chase & Sarah
Anaheim investigator Julissa Trapp is not like other detectives. She’s the only woman on the homicide squad, and a skilled chameleon: undercover cop in vice stings, crime-scene commander, patient confidante of killers. A master interrogator, she invokes her personal experience – and deepest griefs -- as a tool to elicit confessions. When a young woman’s body is found at a trash-sorting plant, Trapp learns the murder may be linked to the disappearance of three other women in nearby Santa Ana. Trapp embarks on a dark journey that brings her face to face with a man who takes “a little piece of her soul.” Listen now at Wondery.fm/TrappIdo
There are many ways to approach improving your relationship and sex life. One approach would be trying new things and seeing what works. Lucky for us, Pam Costa has done a lot of exploration herself and has beautifully shared her journey through her writing and interviews. We're happy to have Pam on the show to explore the work she does as a sex therapist and to share her personal journey. In this episode, we discuss relationship advice topics that include: Learn how to explore your body sexually and take ownership of it How group work can help you in your relationship Experimenting with bondage and 'erotic dinners' How to know and learn what you're in to sexually Open relationships and what monogamists can learn from them How to have deep conversations about sexuality with your partner And much more! After a decade-and-a-half at Apple and Facebook, Pam Costa left her career in high tech and found Down To There to share her real-life stories of challenges and successes around sexuality in her marriage. Through her writing, speaking and coaching, she hopes to inspire individuals and couples to find ways to renew and deepen desire and intimacy in their own relationships. Pam is also passionate about raising awareness within the medical and mental health communities about the positive impact of peer support on female sexual health, recently presenting her research on this topic at the 2018 International Society for the Study of Women’s Sexual Health conference and TEDx Palo Alto. Full show notes and episode links at: http://idopodcast.com/224 Sign up for our 14 Day Happy Couples Challenge here: 14 Day Happy Couples Challenge Join our 5 Day Couples Appreciation Challenge here: idopodcast.com/appreciation Do you want to hear more on this topic? Continue the conversation on our Facebook Group here: Love Tribe Sponsors Zola: Zola is the wedding company that will do anything for love. They are reinventing the wedding planning and registry experience to make the happiest moment in our couples’ lives even happier. To get 30% off your invites and paper order visit ZOLA.com/ido. Pill Club: Birth control that actually gives you control. Get the care that you deserve. Visit thepillclub.com/ido to get your first birth control care package. Spark My Relationship Course: For a limited time, get access to our bonus, Mastering Money Talk In Your Marriage! Visit SparkMyRelationship.com/Unlock for our special offer just for our I Do Podcast listeners! If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a review in iTunes? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Chase & Sarah
No one wants to be wrong. Two individuals often feel they can't both be 'right' when resolving conflict. Learning to hold the needs and feeling of both partners at the same time is a key element to relationship success. Listen to today's show to learn how to stop arguing and take your relationship from 'me' to 'we'. In this episode, we discuss relationship advice topics that include: How to prevent moments of disconnect from accumulating and creating a toxic relationship Understanding that 'you don't know what you don't know' when it comes to what you need to work on in your relationship Why we argue with our partner How to empathize with your partner to move from 'me' to 'we' Key promises to make your partner to take ownership of your relationship and move forward with positivity And much more! Maureen Hosier is a licensed psychologist, specializing in the troubled dynamics of individuals in their romantic relationships and in their family and work place relationships. Maureen and her sister, Berta Hosier Conger, co-authored two books titled, You’ll Do Anything for Her and You’ll Do Anything for Him. They look at a common issue for many in relationship, both men and women, who give up themselves to make the relationship work. They have developed a framework for understanding the dynamics of individuals who find themselves stuck in an emotionally reactive and emotionally painful situation with their partner and who are frightened that they are destroying their relationship. Full show notes and episode links at: http://idopodcast.com/223 Sign up for our 14 Day Happy Couples Challenge here: 14 Day Happy Couples Challenge Join our 5 Day Couples Appreciation Challenge here: idopodcast.com/appreciation Do you want to hear more on this topic? Continue the conversation on our Facebook Group here: Love Tribe Sponsors Native creates safe, simple, effective products that people use in the bathroom everyday, including some amazing deodorant! For 20% off your first purchase, visit nativedeodorant.com and use promo code IDO during checkout! Feals is premium CBD delivered straight to your door. Become a member today by going to Feals.com/ido and get 50% off your first order with free shipping. Spark My Relationship Course: For a limited time, get access to our bonus, Mastering Money Talk In Your Marriage! Visit SparkMyRelationship.com/Unlock for our special offer just for our I Do Podcast listeners! If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a review in iTunes? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Chase & Sarah
Do you feel deeply connected to your partner sexually? Some couples have a sexual spark from the beginning, some build it over time, some never address it and others find it unimportant. Wherever you fall on that spectrum, there are tools to help create more sexual intimacy in your relationship. Listen to today's show to improve your overall relationship and long term relationship satisfaction. In this episode, we discuss relationship advice topics that include: Learn how sexual intimacy permeates all areas of your relationship How to ask for what you need in your relationship through direct communication Five amazing steps to create more sexual intimacy (some of our favorite actionable tips to date!) Parallels between sex and overall relationship intimacy And much more! Dr. Judy Scheel is an expert in the treatment of eating and related disorders and author of a book on eating disorder recovery. She is trained by NYU Medical Langone in Human Sexuality and Sex Therapy. She maintains two blogs on Psychology Today, and is currently finishing up Certification at John Jay College of Criminal Justice in Forensic Psychology. Dr. Scheel maintains a private practice in Charlotte, NC and New York, and is a national and regional speaker. Full show notes and episode links at: http://idopodcast.com/222 Sign up for our 14 Day Happy Couples Challenge here: 14 Day Happy Couples Challenge Join our 5 Day Couples Appreciation Challenge here: idopodcast.com/appreciation Do you want to hear more on this topic? Continue the conversation on our Facebook Group here: Love Tribe Sponsors Away: Luggage for the modern traveler—lightweight, premium features, and a lifetime warranty. For $20 off a suitcase, visit awaytravel.com/IDO and use promo code IDO during checkout. Spark My Relationship Course: For a limited time, get access to our bonus, Mastering Money Talk In Your Marriage! Visit SparkMyRelationship.com/Unlock for our special offer just for our I Do Podcast listeners! If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a review in iTunes? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Chase & Sarah
You know that thing your partner does that just annoys the hell out of you!? Chewing too loud, eating your leftovers, leaving the kitchen a mess, making the 'ahh' noise after taking a sip of water. You know what we're talking about. Well, you don't have to let those behaviors annoy you so much. Listen to today's show to learn how to deal with your partner's annoying habits. Learn the important difference between annoying behaviors and toxic relationship behaviors The importance of assuming good intentions from your partner Understanding the underlying reasons you are annoyed with your partner's behavior How to have a real conversation with your partner to make progress when it comes to annoying behaviors Learning to change yourself before trying to change you partner And much more! Dr. Seth Gillihan is a clinical psychologist, author, blogger and host of the Think Act Be podcast. His therapy practice focuses on mindfulness-based cognitive behavioral therapy for a range of issues, with in-person and video conference appointments available. Seth is the author of The CBT Deck and A Mindful Year, co-written with Dr. Aria Campbell-Danesh. Full show notes and episode links at: http://idopodcast.com/221 Sign up for our 14 Day Happy Couples Challenge here: 14 Day Happy Couples Challenge Join our 5 Day Couples Appreciation Challenge here: idopodcast.com/appreciation Do you want to hear more on this topic? Continue the conversation on our Facebook Group here: Love Tribe Sponsors Plan to Eat: Simplify your life using our recipe clipper, meal planning calendar and automated grocery shopping list maker. Visit plantoeat.com/ido you can start a free 60-day trial. Mint: Get your new wireless plan for just $15 a month, and get the plan shipped to your door for FREE. Visit mintmobile.com/ido Spark My Relationship Course: For a limited time, get access to our bonus, Mastering Money Talk In Your Marriage! Visit SparkMyRelationship.com/Unlock for our special offer just for our I Do Podcast listeners! If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a review in iTunes? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Chase & Sarah
Sometimes relationships are bad and need to end. Whether you're dating or married, there can be a point where you are struggling to find clarity on what you should do in the relationship and if you should allow it to continue. Listen to today's show to give yourself the tools for a relationship checkup and find clarity on if it's a relationship you should stay in. Specific questions to ask yourself to help determine the health of your relationship The importance of asking yourself if you've actually made efforts to sustain the relationship Looking within to see if you have unrealistic expectations for your relationship How to decide if you should break up, separate or divorce Understanding what is specifically troubling you in the relationship and the underlying issues And much more! Ann Gold Buscho, Ph.D., is a licensed clinical psychologist who specializes in family issues and issues related to divorce, parenting, parenting planning and co-parenting counseling. She has professional and personal experience in nesting, co-parenting, step-parenting and single-parenting issues. She has presented widely at state and national conferences for attorneys, mental health professionals, and financial professionals on collaborative divorce, forgiveness practices, nesting during divorce, and consensual dispute resolution. She is currently writing a book about nesting. Buscho is also a co-founder of a residential treatment program for traumatized emergency responders and their families at which she volunteers regularly. A graduate of Stanford University, she lives in San Rafael, California. Full show notes and episode links at: http://idopodcast.com/220 Sign up for our 14 Day Happy Couples Challenge here: 14 Day Happy Couples Challenge Join our 5 Day Couples Appreciation Challenge here: idopodcast.com/appreciation Do you want to hear more on this topic? Continue the conversation on our Facebook Group here: Love Tribe Sponsors Zola: Zola is the wedding company that will do anything for love. They are reinventing the wedding planning and registry experience to make the happiest moment in our couples’ lives even happier. To get 30% off your invites and paper order visit ZOLA.com/ido. Eyeconic: Where you can shop name brand glasses, contacts and sunglasses for the best possible price. Get free shipping and returns, price matching and a complimentary frame adjustment by visiting Eyeconic.com/IDO. Use the code IDO to get 10% off your entire order. Eyeconic is looking out for your eyes! Spark My Relationship Course: For a limited time, get access to our bonus, Mastering Money Talk In Your Marriage! Visit SparkMyRelationship.com/Unlock for our special offer just for our I Do Podcast listeners! If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a review in iTunes? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Chase & Sarah
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Comments (46)

Sean Ratchford

this was extremely helpful...I'm having this problem in my relationship and its pushed me and my at the time girlfriend apart. I'm definitely down for trying this and seeing what results I can get. thanks for such a great episode

Nov 26th
Reply (1)

VoidsOnly

I just wanted to elaborate on the core beliefs part of the podcast, now this is a little difficult to explain because me and my boyfriend have been together for a year, and already we are both 100% sure we are going to get married, and this is not because of the lovey dovey stage. We (from the beginning) have gotten along so well, so much that we never fight. (and I don't mean it like "we rarely fight") we've talked alot about having a family but in the beginning I was 100% against it, but I found that growing with my loved one has got me changing my mind. I am honestly deathly afraid of pain, and knowing about how painful giving birth is really scared me off from it, even as a kid , when some would dream of having a family, I wanted to steer far away from that. anyway, my point is that being in a beautiful and secure relationship has changed my way of thinking. It's incredible how the right person being in your life can effect you.

Sep 14th
Reply

Hilde Wöhler

Hi! Does anyone know the name of the opening song? thank you!

Aug 30th
Reply (1)

Marcy-Rusty Smet

I can't believe this episode states porn use is "ok" and "normal" and that it can even positively impact a relationship. Are you serious?! Do some research on the harmful effects of porn. Porn also fuels the demand for sex trafficking! People should feel VERY ashamed if they are watching this garbage. It's NOT an "anti-masturbation" issue!! Porn is also incredibly fake. It puts these false ideas about sex into people heads (especially young people). It's not real! Talk openly to your SO about your fantasies, what you like/don't like and have fun WITH your partner. Leave the garbage out of it. Wow...you lost a listener because of this episode. I'm disappointed 🙁

Aug 23rd
Reply

Sarah Allen

my partner is an alcoholic I'm so exhausted from lies and denial. it's been 2yrs I was so in love with him now I feel so sick when he kisses me or Trys to be sexual towards me I don't know if I love him enough to stay because he doesn't see he has an issue one bottle of 1ltr vodka a day

Jul 23rd
Reply

Olivia Ioana Dejeu

I lovd your podcasts and they are supeeer helpful ! but this one..no offense but she was talking about completely other subjects and it didn't show a lot of knowledge on a lot of topics

Jul 20th
Reply

Megan Mills

This is such a good episode!!!

Jul 16th
Reply (1)

San Dara

wow gives knowledge

May 19th
Reply

Seliosa 🇬🇭🏳️‍🌈

Interesting episode! One thing that bothered me though was the use of the word "female". Maybe consider using "men and women" instead of "men and females".

May 2nd
Reply

Dave Contarino

I wish he'd quit referring to couples as "opposite sex". These issues apply to same sex couples as well

Apr 22nd
Reply

June Eaton

This is exactly like my husband and I! Omg thank you guys so much!!!!

Apr 21st
Reply

Joseph Wells

thanks for this episode. my wife and I were strong Christians when we got married 13 years ago. I became an atheist and it's hard. I worry about my short life and want to grow and try new things. it unnerves my wife.

Apr 6th
Reply

Whitney Rodden

Your opening question - the one you always ask - is redundant. Everyone gives a different version of the same reply. Skip it!

Mar 30th
Reply

Anthony Savarese

lost me in the first 3 minutes. if you're going to talk about it, you should know your own five principles cold

Mar 24th
Reply

Brandon Boyd

Amazing podcast. Thank you for all the help

Mar 1st
Reply

Jenica Frye

loved this style of episode. felt like I was able to relate with this so much!

Feb 25th
Reply

Nidhi Dogra

the voice is not clear in any of the podcast. I wish it could be better. it's really distracting

Feb 23rd
Reply

Essy SHIRO

I think if you guys left each other at a good note with no feeling attached then you can be friends. But if you still have feelings for your ex then you should not lie to yourself because you can NOT be friends. great podcast

Jan 29th
Reply

Melanie Summerville

Thank you for all your help and support! You guys are great and I really appreciate all the experts you guys interview!!! There all so helpful!!!!! Keep up all the great work? 👍

Jan 25th
Reply

Chael M

it's always been a no for me

Jan 24th
Reply
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