This week, as 2025 draws to a close after an astonishing 11 month run, Dan and Maureen find themselves the holiday spirit. Maureen has a great big mug from the SaysWho shop that she can barely lift. That’s because she hasn’t been working out in the new airport gyms. She needs to do her pull-ups! Yes, the powers that be are closing out 2025—not by bringing peace or prosperity or health care—but by telling Americans we are disgusting and have to dress nicer on planes. And work out more at the gate. Sure, why not.But sometimes, people on planes are disgusting.Now put on a hat and get on that treadmill, SaysWhovia. We have a flight to catch. Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho
This week, Maureen and Dan had to record on Monday, so whatever weird stuff happened on Tuesday, they don’t know about. Don’t tell them. No spoilers.Because this episode is about wonderful things. Maureen has a magical encounter with a SaysWhovian. Dan’s wonderful holiday stockings are flying off the virtual shelves. Books are good! And New York City emerges once again as the best city in the world, because NYC showed up when ICE tried to come to play and caged them in a parking lot. With the garbage bags that Dan is always complaining about. It’s the redemption arc, and we’re all here for it.Plus: capitalism! And war? (?????) Again, no spoilers!Grab that trash, SaysWhovia. Let’s go fight fascism. Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho
Gobble gobble! It’s pretty much Thanksgiving! This week, Dan and Maureen are reflecting on 2025 so far. Like Trump falling in love with Mamdani. Stuff like that. Also, is stuffing any good? But really, Dan is trying to catch a fly. 90% of this episode is Dan trying to catch a fly, which has got to be a metaphor for something. And since we’re talking metaphors, Maureen reads from more of the Nuzzi/Lizza saga because nothing brings a good Thanksgiving meal to an end than a poem that will abolsutely make you barf.Grab a plate, SaysWhovia. It’s time to eat. Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho
Hey, SaysWhovia, are you ready for a little extra this week? This is the Fish Delight of Says Who—50% more—and all of it rich and filling! Come with us as we find out what’s happening with the Epstein emails. Then, Trump finally gets to meet his heroes at McDonalds. And then… then Dan and Maureen really get into it.Because this time we’re going back to someone who was a guest on this very show back in the beginning. We’re going to find out all about Olivia Nuzzi’s new book, American Canto, about her love affair with RFK. Dan wants to read some of it to Maureen, who does not want to be on the receiving end. And just when you think it’s over, the bamboo-riddled reply comes in. This is a story of dirtbag love, terrible ideas, and even worse writing.Grab your McDonald’s Coke and get ready for a bad romance, SayWhovia. Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho
This week, Maureen is on her way to Iceland, and Dan is in Chicagoland, where the battle rages on. Time to talk about the ACA and the Democrats in general! Which is going to be spicy!Grab a puffin, SaysWhovia. It’s time to get real. Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho
Surprise! It was Maureen’s mom’s birthday. She is in PA. There was a party. Actually, there was more than one party. Maureen is still there, so things are going great. She wishes she was in NYC to watch NYC try to get its first non-clown mayor. You already know what happened, SaysWhovia. Dan and Maureen are in the dark.Meanwhile, Dan has split his time between helping people in Chicago, which is still under occupation, and doing his job. It’s a lot! Good thing the government is working and no one has to worry about ACA premiums or…Ah. Wait. Nevermind.Still, it’s not all bad. And it’s such a beautiful fall day! Like Dan and Maureen learned at exactly this time last year—nothing can go wrong now! Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho
Dan and Maureen are back after an unexpected absence (last week’s episode had to go to the Secret Place). A lot has happened! Maureen is trying to make a fake restaurant. Dan drove around with a ghost. No one is sleeping! Meanwhile, the Battle of Chicago is real and raging on. Dan reports in. NYC gets ready for the big election. Also, Trump got mad and tore down the East Wing of the White House in a move no one knew you could do.But Dan and Maureen want to talk about tacos, planners, acupuncture, and the power of healthy habits—healthy habits being tacos, planners, and acupuncture.Put on your hard hat, SaysWhovia. The wrecking ball swings low. Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho
In 2016, two babies sat down to make an eight episode podcast. Now, on episode 400, they reflect on all the things they didn’t know going into this idea—namely, anything. They didn’t know anything. How would they have dealt with street kidnappings, COVID, an increasingly unhinged Trump marauding the land? Probably not well!Also, Dan is now writing a book, and Maureen has seen some new planners.Come with us, SaysWhovia, as we reflect. And talk about office supplies. Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho
Dan hates Illinois Nazis.But there here, so we're gonna have to deal with them. Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho
It's been a week, Sayswhovia.A.Week. Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho
SaysWhovia, some weeks come with too much filling. The news oozes out and gets all over your clothes. This was such a week. And like two people unwittingly and unwillingly taking place in a restaurant challenge, Dan and Maureen have to eat the whole thing. Where to start? The end of non-censored comedy and commentary? Openly listing crimes on social media? Handfuls of cash? A creepy love story? Complaining about escalators at the UN while telling all the other countries they suck? Claiming babies are being jacked with buckets of random substances? Trump trying to say the word “acetaminophen”?How do you eat something like that? One disgusting bite at a time.Get the Tums ready, SaysWhovia. We’re going home with that commemorative plate. Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho
OK yes that thing happened, you know the one. But did you hear about the scuba diver thief at Disney World????Maureen has a book out, awful news happened, and $10k is missing from a paddleboat in Disney Springs. This certainly sounds like an episode of Says Who, doesn't it. Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho
Nine years ago Maureen and Dan sat down to record an eight episode podcast. Mistakes were made.Here they are, 395 episodes later, while Maureen is in the midst of finishing yet another book, to talk about... whatever fresh hell we all find ourselves in. Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho
We know why you came this week, and we are here to deliver. Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho
Dan and Maureen are back! Well, Maureen is still where she was and Dan is still not home, but they are back in SaysWhovia at the end of Dan’s Very Bad, No Good Summer. Dan needs a nap and a hug. He has stories from the American road, though. Have you heard about the vast cotton fields of Utah?Meanwhile, two of his favorite things: the postal system and Chicago are being threatened. New York did a fun thing! Which is nice, because New York is probably about to do some much less fun things in the coming weeks. It’s going to be a weird time in Chicago and New York. Which city will win?Get in line at the breakfast buffet, SaysWhovia. It’s going to be a long trip. Eat up. Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho
Sometimes you find a mace on the road, SaysWhovia. It’s 2025. Pick it up. Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho
SaysWhovia, Dan needs a hug. Maureen, however, is fine and has the receipts to prove it. Everything is very normal and very cool with her. Also, with Trump, who is on the roof of the White House for very normal reasons. Also, we’re going to build a nuclear reactor on the moon! Which is like the roof of the earth, if you think about it long enough. Everything is going up, up, up! Except for Dan’s current timeline, which is why we are all going to give him a hug.Get a blanket, SaysWhovia. It’s roof time. Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho
Maureen is back from the green, green fields of England and has brought a whole new outlook! She saw a cow. Everything is better now. But she did have to explain America to a lot of English people, which was tricky. It’s all about the rollercoasters. Meanwhile, Dan has been holding down the fort. He’s fine. He’s great! He wants to talk to Maureen about soccer, because anything is better than dealing 2025. It’s the Says Who Summer Vacation Experience.Hold on to the safety bar, SaysWhovia. No one has safety checked this ride. Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho
This week, Maureen is in England, where not everything is terrible. There’s tea at four. Birds are singing in the trees. A gentle breeze blows through the air. No one is being fed to alligators. Dan is in the Bad Place still, and wants Maureen to know what has been going on. Everyone is looking for the Epstein files. Trump can dismantle the government, and also, he stole a trophy! Maureen should stay where she is, feeding Marmite sandwiches to ponies.Have a cup of tea, SaysWhovia. Things, as Maureen points out, are only getting started. Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho
Hey Sayswhovia! It is hot and it is bad and Maureen and Dan are here to help (???) you through it. And hey, as bad as things are, at least you're not Dan, whose teeth keep falling out. Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho
Amelia Poole
love this so much!!!