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Semi-Together

Author: Gillian Burgess and Melia Dicker

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Semi-Together is a podcast by sisters Gillian Burgess and Melia Dicker about having some of your life together all of the time. It’s about working on where you want to get it together, while giving yourself credit for where you’ve got it together. As we learn to live with more calm, joy, and authenticity, we share takeaways from our research and experience that you can use, too.

Topics: Perfectionism, self-compassion, personal development, anxiety, stress, coping skills, psychology, goals, authenticity, vulnerability, ADHD, optimism, happiness, humor, joy, evolving, self-care, gratitude
98 Episodes
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In this episode, we discuss how to acknowledge (vs "celebrate") emotionally complex anniversaries of life-altering challenges, like serious illness or loss. How do we process these events? What kinds of rituals help us through the peaks and valleys that accompany them? We talk with Tara Blumenthal, owner of Tara Yoga Movement and Wellness Clinic, about her experiences moving through difficult anniversaries. We’ll also share some insights from our Semi-Together patrons and other loved ones who’ve been through their own challenging anniversaries. *Note that this episode contains mature language and deals with complex topics like major illness and death, with a brief mention of self-harm. -- Links: Tara Blumenthal: Instagram: @notyouraverageyogateacher / @mellowkissroyals Tara Yoga & Wellness Clinic in Flowood, MS: @tarayogaclinic www.tarayogamovementandwellnessclinic.com ----- Find us on the web for show notes and extras: www.semitogether.com Instagram: www.instagram.com/semitogether Facebook: https://facebook.com/semitogether Book a Discovery Call with Melia, who coaches adults with ADHD via Zoom: www.risingspiralcoaching.com  --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/semi-together/message
Happy New Year! To celebrate last year's wins and set intentions for this year, we each share three "Got It Together"s from 2023 and three "Get It Together"s for 2024. That is, three areas where we've made meaningful strides, and three areas where we would most like to progress. Get It Together, Got It Together, is a segment we do in most episodes, where we share something that we’d like to work on and something that’s going well for us right now. We’ve found this framing helpful to remind us that at any given moment, there are things that are working for us as well as things that aren’t. It helps us find the wins -- especially on the days where it feels like everything is falling apart -- and helps us notice that all of it is constantly shifting. We'd love to hear your 2023 "Got It Together"s and 2024 "Get It Together"s. You can them with us at podcast@semitogether.com. -- Find us on the web for show notes and extras: www.semitogether.com Instagram: www.instagram.com/semitogether Facebook: https://facebook.com/semitogether Book a Discovery Call with Melia, who coaches adults with ADHD via Zoom: www.risingspiralcoaching.com  Links: 2023's new year's episode: Ep. 74: So This Is The New YearFor 2024, how about living a truly quiet life? (Susan Cain’s Substack: The Quiet Life  --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/semi-together/message
The holiday season is beginning ... and it's a lot! We talk about how we’re approaching the season when our bandwidth is limited and our plates are full: gauging capacity, setting intentions, and communicating boundaries. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/semi-together/message
It’s spooky season, and we’re talking about how to find our just-right amount of thrills and chills -- what feels fun or engaging for each of us (eustress), and what’s too much (distress). The amount of challenge that we desire in each arena of life can differ quite a bit, depending on our individual nervous system and season of life. What’s brave for one of us can be too extreme for another, and only we can know for ourselves. ---- Find us on the web for show notes and extras: ⁠www.semitogether.com⁠ Instagram: ⁠www.instagram.com/semitogether⁠ Facebook: ⁠https://facebook.com/semitogether⁠ Book a Discovery Call with Melia, who coaches adults with ADHD via Zoom: ⁠www.risingspiralcoaching.com ⁠ Links: ⁠What to Know About Eustress⁠ (VerywellMind) ⁠Paul Rudd throws a clean-up tantrum⁠ in Wet Hot American Summer The ⁠window of tolerance⁠, a concept developed by Dr. Dan Siegel, MD --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/semi-together/message
Most of us aspire to live a good life. We may assume we know what that looks like, without asking what a good life looks like for us -- which may diverge quite a bit from cultural ideals. In this episode, we share research findings on the essential elements of general well-being and discuss how our own ideas of a good life have changed over time. Links: ⁠The Good Life: Lessons from the World’s Longest Scientific Study of Happiness⁠, by Marc Schulz, MD, and Robert Waldinger, MD ⁠TED talk⁠ / ⁠transcript⁠ by Robert Waldinger, director of the Harvard Study of Adult Development  The Blue Zones - the ⁠Power 9⁠ practices for longevity Dr. Dean Ornish - research-based ⁠lifestyle medicine⁠ ----- Find us on the web for show notes and extras: www.semitogether.com Instagram: www.instagram.com/semitogether Facebook: https://facebook.com/semitogether Book a Discovery Call with Melia, who coaches adults with ADHD via Zoom: www.risingspiralcoaching.com  --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/semi-together/message
There's a simple action you can take to lower anxiety and stress, calm your nervous system, and increase your feeling of connection with others and the world around you. It's free, straightforward, and takes only a couple of minutes to feel the benefits. That practice is finding everyday awe. In this episode, we share the eight wonders of life from the research of Dacher Keltner, a professor of psychology, founding director of the Greater Good Science Center at UC Berkeley, and author of the new book, Awe: The New Science of Everyday Wonder and How It Can Transform Your Life. We discuss how these have shown up in our lives and what you can do to cultivate them in your own. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/semi-together/message
What feels restful to you? Some of us are so accustomed to doing and striving that we’re not quite sure anymore. Still, our minds and bodies need real rest to function, especially when we’re under stress. Coming off a restful week together in Spain, we discuss how to identify what renews your energy and carve out time for it.  ----- Find us on the web for show notes and extras: www.semitogether.com Instagram: www.instagram.com/semitogether Facebook: https://facebook.com/semitogether Book a Discovery Call with Melia, who coaches adults with ADHD via Zoom: www.risingspiralcoaching.com  Links: Ep. 20:  Self-Care Is Not Just for Women, with Chris Myers Life In Five Senses: How Exploring the Senses Got Me Out of My Head and Into the World, by Gretchen Rubin --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/semi-together/message
Spring cleaning has a number of mental health benefits. It gives you a sense of control over your environment that can help you manage stress and anxiety in your daily life. And making your space more open and tidy is both calming and energizing.  We share 5 guiding questions, with examples from our lives, to help you figure out: which types of spring cleaning will free up the most bandwidth for you what the good / better / best version of "done" looks like, and small steps you can take to get to “good.” Find us on the web for show notes and extras: www.semitogether.com Instagram: @semitogether Facebook: /semitogether Book a Discovery Call with Melia, who coaches adults with ADHD virtually: www.risingspiralcoaching.com  -- Links: The Mental Health Benefits of Spring Cleaning (Vogue) Marie Kondo Interviews Elizabeth Gilbert on Tidying the Mind (KonMari) Decluttering at the Speed of Life, by Dana K. White How to Keep House While Drowning, by KC Davis The Home Edit  --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/semi-together/message
As humans trying to keep up with the lightning-fast pace of the modern world, many of us often feel overwhelmed. It may be in a certain area of life --  like health, work, family, or current events -- and commonly, it’s all of the above all at once. In this episode, we share what overwhelm is and how to take small steps to break through it, including reading your body’s warning signs, calming your nervous system, and using “on-ramps” to move yourself forward.  -- Links: Ep. 44: Pressing the Reset Button (on actions to complete the stress cycle) Resources: Atlas of the Heart: Mapping Meaningful Connection and the Language of Human Experience, by Brené Brown Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle, by Amelia and Emily Nagoski -- Find us on the web for show notes and extras: www.semitogether.com Instagram: www.instagram.com/semitogether Facebook: https://facebook.com/semitogether Book a Discovery Call with Melia, who coaches adults with ADHD virtually: www.risingspiralcoaching.com  --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/semi-together/message
We bring in our husbands, Brian and Darren (a.k.a. The Dudes) to discuss our love languages and how they show up in our relationships. Gary Chapman published the book “The 5 Love Languages” over 30 years ago. Since then, the concept of “love languages” have become an enduring part of our pop culture lexicon, beyond the original five from the book. People talk about their love languages being tacos or travel or solitude in an empty house. What are your love languages, and has knowing them helped you in your relationships (of all kinds)? Tell us at podcast@semitogether.com. ----- Resources: Take The 5 Love Languages Quiz Scary Mommy: The Creator Of The 5 Love Languages Is A Homophobe And This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things TED: Your Favorite Person’s Love Language: How to Tell, and How to Use It The Gottman Institute: “Invest in Your Emotional Bank Account” Reductress: How to Say Your Love Languages Is Gifts Without Sounding Like a French Child Prince ----- Find us on the web for show notes and extras: www.semitogether.com Instagram: www.instagram.com/semitogether Facebook: https://facebook.com/semitogether Book a Discovery Call with Melia, who coaches adults with ADHD virtually: www.risingspiralcoaching.com  --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/semi-together/message
It feels important right now to figure out how to navigate the major stressors in our lives and move forward even when we’re struggling. Some of the people close to us are going through hard times right now, like infertility, serious illness, and loss of a loved one. It makes sense that as we get older, the more illness and loss we experience, but it doesn’t make it any easier. We’ve been coping by reading books about finding hope, beauty, and meaning in the midst of pain. We wanted to share the takeaways that we’ve found most helpful, and how they've carried each of us through adversity. Note that we talk about dealing with difficult experiences such as illness, grief, and loss, so you may want to listen with headphones around young kids. If you’re going through something tough right now, we hope this conversation can be a support to you, but if it’s triggering in any way, feel free to skip this one. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/semi-together/message
We’ve always been amused by the holiday song that begins, “So this is Christmas,” because of its ambivalent vibe, like, “Welp, I guess this is happening.” But this opening line actually captures how we feel about the start of 2023.. In this episode, we talk about framing our intentions for the new year at a time when we’re both dealing with some big challenges and not feeling 100% peppy. However you’re feeling about the new year -- excited, apprehensive, optimistic, overwhelmed, or a blend of emotions -- is  okay. You get to decide how to start this new year the way that’s right for you and feel what you feel about it, no matter what anyone else is doing. How are you approaching 2023? Tell us at podcast@semitogether.com. Previous New Year’s episodes: Ep. 62: Start the New Year with a Vision Ep. 47: Goodbye 2020, Hello 2021! Ep. 37: Reimagining Our 2020 Goals Ep. 29: 20 for 2020 Goals Ep. 7: Tighten Up and Lighten Up Ep. 2: How to Stick with Resolutions & Goals Resources: Imprint App Anxiety RX, by Dr. Russ Kennedy ----- Find us on the web for show notes and extras: www.semitogether.com Instagram: www.instagram.com/semitogether Facebook: https://facebook.com/semitogether Book a Discovery Call with Melia, who coaches adults with ADHD virtually: www.risingspiralcoaching.com  --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/semi-together/message
The holidays can be A LOT, especially when we’ve been in survival mode -- as many of us have been since the pandemic started. This has been a challenging year for us: Gill has been managing her cancer diagnosis and treatment, while Melia has been building her coaching business and moving to New York with her family. There’s a lot of cultural pressure to make the holidays “the most wonderful time of the year,” but WE get to decide what our holidays look like. To lower stress and overwhelm and boost joy and connection, we start by zeroing in on what matters most to us. When our priority and intention is clear, we can let the rest go. A few questions to ask yourself when considering baking cookies, buying gifts, going to holiday events, etc.: Do I want to do this? If I want to do this, what do I want from the experience? What matters most to me? How does it affect my body budget (deposits/withdrawals), and how do I plan to stay fueled? Tell us: What are your intentions for this holiday season? What are you choosing to do and not to do? Email us at podcast@semitogether.com or send us a voice memo. ----- Resources: Brain-Body Parenting: How to Stop Managing Behavior and Start Raising Joyful, Resilient Kids, by Mona Delahooke Anxiety RX: A New Prescription for Anxiety Relief from the Doctor Who Created It., by Russell Kennedy, M.D. The Tapping Solution (EFT Tapping Meditation app) ----- Find us on the web for show notes and extras: www.semitogether.com Instagram: www.instagram.com/semitogether Facebook: https://facebook.com/semitogether Book a Discovery Call with Melia, who coaches adults with ADHD: www.risingspiralcoaching.com  --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/semi-together/message
A lot of us are going through major transitions right now: moving to new locations, changing jobs or relationship status, having kids, or going through losses or health challenges. Many of us are shifting into a new phase in our lives or re-evaluating our priorities due to the pandemic. The bittersweet nature of many of these transitions has been on our minds lately for a variety of reasons. Melia and her family just moved from Jackson, MS to the Albany, NY area, away from many people and places they love. We recorded this episode together in person at our childhood home in Sonoma, CA, before our parents put the house on the market and move closer to us both. We draw upon Susan Cain’s beautiful book, Bittersweet: How Sorrow and Longing Make Us Whole, as we cope with feelings of grief for what’s ending mixed with anticipation for what’s ahead. We share how we are embracing the bittersweet and, as always, feel it all. When do you tend to feel bittersweet? What are some ways that embracing bittersweetness helps you through transitions? Tell us at podcast@semitogether.com. Resources: Bittersweet: How Sorrow and Longing Make Us Whole, by Susan Cain Atlas of the Heart: Mapping Meaningful Connection and the Language of Human Experience, by Brené Brown Unlocking Us podcast: Brené with Susan Cain on How Sorrow & Longing Make Us Whole, Part 1 Unlocking Us podcast: Brené with Susan Cain on How Sorrow & Longing Make Us Whole, Part 2 Find us on the web for show notes and extras: www.semitogether.com Instagram: www.instagram.com/semitogether Facebook: https://facebook.com/semitogether Book a Discovery Call with Melia, who coaches adults with ADHD: www.risingspiralcoaching.com  --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/semi-together/message
Our upbringing, culture, and traumatic experiences can disconnect us from our emotions and intuition. Many of us get stuck in our minds and stop noticing the pain or discomfort in our bodies, so we miss signals that are crucial to our well-being. In this episode, we discuss why feeling your emotions matters and how to do it. We share practices that are teaching us to feel it all, and which you can use to do the same. Find us on the web for show notes and extras: www.semitogether.com Instagram: www.instagram.com/semitogether Facebook: https://facebook.com/semitogether Book a Discovery Call with Melia, who coaches adults with ADHD: www.risingspiralcoaching.com  --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/semi-together/message
Wellllll 🤬🤬🤬 Sometimes things don’t go as planned. You realize that a situation is out of your control, there’s nothing you can do about it, and it just plain sucks. This episode is unfortunately inspired by recent real-life events. We were supposed to meet in D.C. this month for some much-needed sister time, but the universe/ pandemic had other plans. One of our coping mechanisms is thinking, “It’s all content,” when things don’t go our way. In that spirit, we share five strategies to help you deal with disappointment when reality falls short of your expectations. Find us on the web for show notes and extras: www.semitogether.com Instagram: www.instagram.com/semitogether Facebook: https://facebook.com/semitogether Book a Discovery Call with Melia, who coaches adults with ADHD: www.risingspiralcoaching.com  Resources: Atlas of the Heart: Mapping Meaningful Connection and the Language of Human Experience by Brené Brown Unlocking Us podcast: Comparative Suffering, the 50/50 Myth, and Settling the Ball Episode 44: Pressing the Reset Button  --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/semi-together/message
If you’ve heard us refer to our Enneagram types in previous episodes (Melia is a 1, Gill is a 7) and wondered what the heck we were talking about, or if you are familiar with the Enneagram framework and want to learn more, this episode is for you! We talk to our dear friend Alicia Ross, a certified Enneagram coach who is starting a new Enneagram training and coaching business this summer. The pandemic has brought out the worst in most of us at some point – the way we act when we’re overwhelmed and scared. As challenging as this period is, it’s also an opportunity to look at why we do the things we do, even when we know they don’t serve us. Alicia shares: How the Enneagram personality system can help us understand these patterns, give us more compassion for ourselves and other people, and open up the space to make a different choice. Descriptions of the 9 Enneagram types in this context, highlighting what causes stress for each type, and how each can find more balance, peace, sanity, and connection. For reference, we’ve included timestamps for each type: Overview of the Enneagram: What is it, how it’s useful, and how it differs from other personality systems -  4:48 Type One, The Reformer - 22:59 Type Two, The Helper - 33:29 Type Three, The Achiever - 43:06 Type Four, The Individualist - 52:41 Type Five, The Investigator - 61:11 Type Six, The Loyalist - 70:17 Type Seven, The Enthusiast - 76:36 Type Eight, The Challenger - 86:20 Type Nine, The Peacemaker - 95:11 Learn more about Alicia Ross and her Enneagram workshops and coaching: https://www.enneagramgrowthpath.com/ Read more about each type on the Enneagram Institute website: https://www.enneagraminstitute.com Ryan O’Neal’s Sleeping at Last album of moving songs about Enneagram type: https://open.spotify.com/album/1R3C4VebWmWXFlbTSnnLql?si=WJstRap5SlKS0cwrFVeLaA Find us on the web for show notes and extras: https://www.semitogether.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/semitogether Facebook: https://facebook.com/semitogether Subscribe to our e-newsletter for episode roundups, tips to steal + extras: https://www.subscribepage.com/semitogether Become a patron of the podcast and access bonuses and extras: https://www.patreon.com/semitogether Book a Discovery Call with Melia, who coaches adults with ADHD: www.risingspiralcoaching.com  --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/semi-together/message
When we think about setting boundaries, many of us focus on external boundaries: the limits we set with other people around our time, physical space, privacy, etc. But internal boundaries – those we need to protect our inner worlds from outside influences – are just as important, and often more difficult to set and hold. In this episode, we discuss what it looks like to have healthy internal boundaries that nurture our self-trust and confidence, and help us take responsibility for our actions and well-being. In our Get It Together / Got It Together segment, we each share the internal boundaries we want to strengthen, and the ones that we've done the work to establish. Let us know how you manage your own internal boundaries. Which limits feel strong, and which are you still working on? Find us on the web for show notes and extras: https://www.semitogether.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/semitogether Facebook: https://facebook.com/semitogether Subscribe to our e-newsletter for episode roundups, tips to steal + extras: https://www.subscribepage.com/semitogether Become a patron of the podcast and access bonuses and extras: https://www.patreon.com/semitogether Book a Discovery Call with Melia, who coaches adults with ADHD: www.risingspiralcoaching.com  --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/semi-together/message
Heads up that this episode contains swearing. Let’s revisit The F**k It List! We recorded an episode on this topic back in February 2021, a year into the pandemic, when we were reevaluating our priorities and deciding how we want to spend our precious time and energy going forward. Making a F**k It List is a fun and liberating exercise. Think of it as the anti-Bucket List. Instead of “Things to do before you die,” it’s “Things to stop doing so you can fully live.” The F**k It List can also be an alternative to short-term goal lists or resolutions. It’s a list of things that we may have done out of obligation, or optics, or in service of goals we used to have, but we are consciously letting go of, because we get to decide. Tell us what's on your own F**k It List at podcast@semitogether.com. Find us on the web for show notes and extras: https://www.semitogether.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/semitogether Facebook: https://facebook.com/semitogether Subscribe to our e-newsletter for episode roundups, tips to steal + extras: https://www.subscribepage.com/semitogether Become a patron of the podcast and access bonuses and extras: https://www.patreon.com/semitogether Book a Discovery Call with Melia, who coaches adults with ADHD: www.risingspiralcoaching.com  --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/semi-together/message
As National Poetry Month begins, we discuss the power of poetry to express emotion, read some of our favorite poems, and share what they mean to us. Become a patron of the podcast on Patreon (linked below) and read a couple of poems we’ve written that are close to our hearts. Gill gives a health update and thanks our people for all of their loving support. Melia reveals what is helping her sleep better after many restless nights. We’d love to hear your favorite poems and the role that reading or writing poetry has played in your life. Email us or send a voice memo to podcast@semitogether.com. Find us on the web for show notes and extras: https://www.semitogether.com Become a patron of the podcast and access bonuses and extras: https://www.patreon.com/semitogether Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/semitogether Facebook: https://facebook.com/semitogether Subscribe to our e-newsletter for episode roundups, tips to steal + extras: https://www.subscribepage.com/semitogether Book a Discovery Call with Melia, who coaches adults with ADHD to get things done in ways that work for our wild, creative brains: www.risingspiralcoaching.com. Poems that have special meaning for us: Ithaka, by C.P. Cavafy [love is more thicker than forget], by e.e. Cummings Sonnet XVII, by Pablo Neruda  The Dream Keeper, by Langston Hughes The Guest House, by Rumi Singsong, by Rita Dove The Thing Is, by Ellen Bass Phenomenal Woman, by Maya Angelou Those Winter Sundays, by Robert Hayden We Shake With Joy, by Mary Oliver Don’t Hesitate, by Mary Oliver This Be the Verse, by Philip Larkin The Hill We Climb, by Amanda Gorman Rollercoaster, by Jasmine Gardosi Wild Geese, by Mary Oliver Love Poem, by John Frederick Nims [i carry your heart with me(i carry it in], by e.e. Cummings [in Just-] by e.e. Cummings “Milkshake” poem from the movie Before Sunrise --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/semi-together/message
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