Shadow Work Voice Notes

I have never explained this topic in such a detailed, in-depth, and practical way before. I was inspired by the conclusion of my previous voice note (#22. What does training cats have to do with human interactions?) to dive into the deep whys of how we co-create relationships, situations, and interactions with others... and what came out was the most comprehensive explanation I've ever given. I was so pleased with how clearly I was able to articulate this topic... because it tends to be something that people ask A LOT... "How can WE create a relationship when there is this whole other person involved???" Well... THIS is how! This is an essential listen for anyone wanting to take their shadow work to another level and begin creating healthy, fulfilling, and satisfying relationships! This is something of a conceptual episode, but it is a very important concept to grasp. 🪐 Who am I? I am Natalie Ivette, Shadow Work Coach and founder of ⁠⁠⁠⁠Saturnish⁠⁠⁠⁠. I aim to help you, you beautifully and perfectly imperfect human, to see, express, and embrace all that you are- especially those parts you have previously rejected. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Connect with me on Facebook⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ (don't be afraid to send a friend request!) or Join me ⁠⁠⁠⁠in my group, Surrendring to Gravity⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and get to know me more personally.

Yep. I'm talking about cats again 🤭😸 They say you can't train a cat, but the truth is... you so can. It's just not the same as with dogs. What does that have anything at all to do with humans and shadow work?! Well, the thing is, we can learn a lot about interacting with each other from cats. Respect. Giving space. Saying no. Learning how to pay attention and focus on the positive in order to create a win-win situation... I've said it before (in episodes 16. Freedom & self-regulation, and 4. Lessons from a cat): I have learned a lot about how to interact with humans in healthier ways through my cats. In this voice note, I started out with the impulse to talk about my thoughts on training cats, but the conversation deepens in such a way that it eventually leads me to talking about the levels of consciousness and how we interact with each other. And teaser alert... it inspired me to immediately record the next entry (coming next week), which is a dive deep into an explanation of the level of consciousness within us and how they affect our relationships and interactions. It's probably going to be one of the best episodes that I've recorded, and this one is the sort of the prologue to it. You don't want to miss either of these voice notes! So, let's talk about my sweet kitties and how observing them is always teaching me so much about myself!! 🪐 Who am I? I am Natalie Ivette, Shadow Work Coach and founder of ⁠⁠⁠Saturnish⁠⁠⁠. I aim to help you, you beautifully and perfectly imperfect human, to see, express, and embrace all that you are- especially those parts you have previously rejected. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Connect with me on Facebook⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ (don't be afraid to send a friend request!) or Join me ⁠⁠⁠in my group, Surrendring to Gravity⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and get to know me more personally.

I talk about listening to your body all the time, but in this entry, I am giving you a look at how I do this for myself in real-time. I was feeling off when I recorded this voice note and decided to make a record of me talking it out. In this voice note, I exemplify the process of allowing your feelings and sensations to speak to you/how to interpret what you are feeling... and how to use the mind to actually help you rather than hinder you. I also discuss a little astrology here, as I have been experiencing my Pluto square this year- and let me tell you... it has been quite challenging! (Just FYI, I actually recorded this note back in July, so when I'm talking Pluto and where it is in its retrograde, it is relevant to mid-July.) I talk a bit about how I have been feeling this transit affects me as well and how it relates to my sensations. This is quite an interesting one, even if (I will admit) it may get a little ramble-y in the middle. It's part of my storytelling process!! :) 🪐 Who am I? I am Natalie Ivette, Shadow Work Coach and founder of ⁠⁠Saturnish⁠⁠. I aim to help you, you beautifully and perfectly imperfect human, to see, express, and embrace all that you are- especially those parts you have previously rejected. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Connect with me on Facebook⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ (don't be afraid to send a friend request!) or Join me ⁠⁠in my group, Surrendring to Gravity⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and get to know me more personally.

It seems to me that everywhere I see people talking about spiritual and/or esoteric topics, there is this way of looking at and speaking about the mind as if it is this enemy that is out to get us and must be overcome... but I see it very differently. Yes, it's true that we have been using our mind in ways that are not correct- making it the ultimate decision maker, using it to override our emotions and dissociate from our bodies, making ourselves a slave to its logic, etc. BUT that is not because our minds are these evil tricksters that are trying to keep us down and enslaved. No, no!! It is us who have put our minds to work for us in incorrect ways and then wonder why we are having so many difficulties when it wreaks havoc in our lives. In this voice note, I discuss my thoughts on how and why we have been doing this to ourselves and our minds, and how I believe the mind is actually meant to be used in the whole scheme of things. 🪐 Who am I? I am Natalie Ivette, Shadow Work Coach and founder of ⁠Saturnish⁠. I aim to help you, you beautifully and perfectly imperfect human, to see, express, and embrace all that you are- especially those parts you have previously rejected. ⁠⁠⁠⁠Connect with me on Facebook⁠⁠⁠⁠ (don't be afraid to send a friend request!) or Join me ⁠in my group, Surrendring to Gravity⁠⁠⁠⁠, and get to know me more personally.

Ok. This is one of the most important conversations that we have and it is the foundation of the deeply transformative kind of shadow work that I do and guide others through. Feeling your feelings. I know it can seem a little like, well, duh, right?! 😅You just... feel them!! But what does that actually mean? And here's the real interesting thing: In my work with and interactions with so many people, I came to discover that most people don't actually know how to even begin to feel and hold space for their feelings. They THINK that they are doing it... but what they are actually doing is just thinking about them. When I point that out, the response I get is... ok, but what else am I supposed to do?? In this entry, I discuss this oh-so-important difference and end up diving into the nuances and hows. You definitely don't want to miss this voice note!! And if you would like my help and guidance in your own shadow work journey, let's hop on a call and see how I can help you! - because let's be honest, this sort of work can be confusing when we have never held space for our feelings before!! 🪐 Who am I? I am Natalie Ivette, Shadow Work Coach and founder of Saturnish. I aim to help you, you beautifully and perfectly imperfect human, to see, express, and embrace all that you are- especially those parts you have previously rejected. ⁠⁠⁠Connect with me on Facebook⁠⁠⁠ (don't be afraid to send a friend request!) or Join me in my group, Surrendring to Gravity⁠⁠⁠, and get to know me more personally.

I put rant in quotation marks because this probably barely qualifies as such haha... but it's as rant-y as I get. The thing is, I see so much conversation about different "spiritual" practices... protection... cleansing... together with conversations about "evolve... awake... ascent..." (yeah, I did a whole episode just on the concept of awakening and ascension already - check it out here! - but I have more to say on the subject lol!!) But the bottom line is that all of these things that so many people are talking about are so superfluous and unnecessary when you get right down to it... not when you are present in, fully processing and feeling your feelings!! Before recording this entry, I think I came across a post that spoke to these topics... something like, "How to protect your energy." or what have you... And I will admit. It set me off... got me tumbling down into some of my shadows, and that is the basis of where this little rant comes from. But as with anything, being present in it all is a part of the process, and I explore that some in this voice note as well. So join me as I explore my thoughts and as I indulge my need to vent a little, while also diving into some really deep insights about it all, at the same time! 🪐 Who am I? I am Natalie Ivette White, founder of Saturnish and Shadow Work Coach. I aim to help you, you beautifully and perfectly imperfect human, to see, express, and embrace all that you are- especially those parts you have previously rejected. ⁠⁠Find out more about me and all that I offer⁠⁠ Join me ⁠⁠here, in my Facebook group, Surrendring to Gravity⁠⁠, and get to know me more personally.

In anything in life, there can be a healthy and an unhealthy manifestation... and in my need to give and receive freedom, I have experienced how that shadow, or unhealthy, side can come up. There's really not much to say here as a preamble lol, so just listen in as I discuss how I have come to realize and witness the shadow side of this need of mine! 🪐 Who am I? I am Natalie White, founder of Saturnish and Shadow Work Coach. I aim to help you, you beautifully and perfectly imperfect human, to see, express, and embrace all that you are- especially those parts you have previously rejected. ⁠⁠⁠⁠Find out more about me and all that I offer⁠⁠⁠⁠ Join me⁠⁠ ⁠⁠here, in my Facebook group, Surrendring to Gravity⁠⁠⁠⁠, and get to know me more personally

What do you value most? And in what ways do you observe these values shaping how you interact with the world and beings around you? I value freedom and the freedom to self-regulate above all else, and it's funny how I came to really understand this through my observations of how I thought my pets felt! I realized that it was just me projecting what I imagined I would feel... and that did not necessarily mean that it would be universally true for all creatures. We tend to think that because we feel a certain way, then so does everyone else... but that is not so. However, if we can step back and view what we are thinking others are feeling more objectively, we will find that we can actually learn a lot about ourselves. In this voice note, I explore the topic of freedom and self-regulation... some of my most important values and needs in life, and what it all means to me. 🪐 Who am I? I am Natalie White, founder of Saturnish and Shadow Work Coach. I aim to help you, you beautifully and perfectly imperfect human, to see, express, and embrace all that you are- especially those parts you have previously rejected. ⁠⁠⁠Find out more about me and all that I offer⁠⁠⁠ Join me⁠ ⁠⁠here, in my Facebook group, Surrendring to Gravity⁠⁠⁠, and get to know me more personally

I talk a lot about how important it is to pay attention to your body and “follow” your energy. But I don’t just talk about it; this is something I LIVE daily and put into practice in my own life… in the most experiential of ways. I will often joke (to anyone who will listen lol) that I came to the point where I threw my hands up and said, “Sacral, take the wheel!” You see, I am a sacral generator (my Human Design authority and type), and I am designed to be led by my sacral energy and gut feelings.  As I have experimented deeply with this and what it actually and practically means in my life, I have been amazed at the sense of rightness and satisfaction I have begun to experience regularly and throughout my daily experiences. Of course, it’s not all sunshine, roses, and satisfaction. The very nature of experimentation is that we also experience what doesn’t work! In this voice note, I analyze the difference between feeling like I am in my flow and when I am not… why it happens, and what it means…  I was feeling great one week and then not so much the next… which led me to wrestling and grappling with it all, as well as seeking to find some greater clarity, as I share my thought processes with you, here. I also explore how and why my peanut-gallery, monkey mind has actually begun to TRUST my gut… my sacral… as the driver of my life. If you would like to explore how you can find and follow the flow of your own energy, let’s talk; schedule an intro session. 🪐 Who am I? I am Natalie White, founder of Saturnish and Shadow Work Coach. I aim to help you, you beautifully and perfectly imperfect human, to see, express, and embrace all that you are- especially those parts you have previously rejected. ⁠⁠Find out more about me and all that I offer⁠⁠ Join me ⁠⁠here, in my Facebook group, Surrendring to Gravity⁠⁠, and get to know me more personally

Learning to express your emotions is important. But what does that mean exactly? Expressing your emotions is more than just putting words to them and saying them out loud... that's just a mental process. (An important part of the whole, for sure, but if you stop there, you are doing yourself a disservice.) One of the tougher emotions for me to learn to hold space for and express was anger. And one of the ways that I began to open up to that was by smacking walls with pillows... and giving myself space for "controlled" "temper tantrums." In this entry, I talk about exactly that... how I leaned into my anger and learned to express it... and how and why it's important to give physical expression to our emotions. 🪐 Who am I? I am Natalie White, founder of Saturnish and Shadow Work Coach. I aim to help you, you beautifully and perfectly imperfect human, to see, express, and embrace all that you are- especially those parts you have previously rejected. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Find out more about me and all that I offer⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Join me⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠here, in my Facebook group, Surrendring to Gravity⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and get to know me more personally And if you are enjoying this and other episodes, I'd be so happy if you would ⁠⁠⁠⁠support this podcast⁠⁠⁠⁠, subscribe/follow, and/or leave a review.

On this day, I was feeling extremely uncomfortable and in need of talking through what was going on so that I could better understand what I was feeling. Since this whole podcast was born out of this very need, I decided that I would share this deeply personal, open, and uncensored voice note, where I seek to make conscious a feeling which had previously been vague and unconscious. This is part of the practical, real process that I use in my personal shadow work "practice" that helps me to open up and identify what the heck is going on in my inner world. Shadow work- making the unconscious conscious in order to know yourself, feel your feelings, and embrace your deeper truths- has different layers to it. One of them, and what I share in this voice note, is the mental process of gaining or deepening awareness and understanding of your present reality. Be forewarned... this one may go a bit all over the place at times, as I use my mind to try to express and bring clarity to my emotions. It's not a linear process and may meander a bit as I gather my thoughts and try to put it into concrete terms... and, lol, I do get a little deep into an analogy (because I do love my analogies!!) - but if you bear with me and get through to the end, it does all come together. My desire is for this to serve as an example of how you might approach exploring your feelings, thoughts, and tendencies. Self-questioning and using your mind to be the interpreter and explorer of your inner world... that is the process. Remember, your mind is not the one who comes up with the answers. It simply observes and interprets. ps- I don't normally curse, but when I started recording I had thought I was just recording it as a personal note. I decided later that this was a good one to share! So there is a curse word or two in the middle there 😬 🪐 Who am I? I am Natalie White, founder of Saturnish and Shadow Work Coach. I aim to help you, you beautifully and perfectly imperfect human, to see, express, and embrace all that you are- especially those parts you have previously rejected. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Find out more about me and all that I offer⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Join me⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠here, in my Facebook group, Surrendring to Gravity⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and get to know me more personally And if you are enjoying this and other episodes, I'd be so happy if you would ⁠⁠⁠support this podcast⁠⁠⁠, subscribe/follow, and/or leave a review.

I feel like popular culture tends to reject routine and schedules as something antiquated and restrictive... and, to a degree, the prescription is that it is something we need to break free from. I know that, for some time, I thought I had been conditioned to follow schedules and routines and that this was a mental block I needed to overcome. However, through learning more about my Human Design, I came to realize that my body actually needs and thrives on routines! This is not to say that all routines serve me; it takes an understanding of what my energy needs are in order to honor the kind of routine that my body needs. In this entry, I explore my relationship to routines, how and why they serve me- and also when they don't! This kind of self-awareness is an important one. I think that we too easily and glibly will make blanket assumptions about what is good and what isn't without actually analyzing what is working for us and what isn't. 🪐 Who am I? I am Natalie White, founder of Saturnish and Shadow Work Coach. I aim to help you, you beautifully and perfectly imperfect human, to see, express, and embrace all that you are- especially those parts you have previously rejected. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Find out more about me and all that I offer⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Join me⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠here, in my Facebook group, Surrendring to Gravity⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and get to know me more personally And if you are enjoying this and other episodes, I'd be so happy if you would ⁠⁠support this podcast⁠⁠, subscribe/follow, and/or leave a review.

I have always struggled with anxiety. It's what comes up for me when I'm having a difficult time... it's my "safe" emotion that takes over when I'm resisting what I'm feeling. On this one particular day, I was struggling quite a bit with a strong bout of anxiety when I had a question pop up out of nowhere that gave me pause... the question was, "What if I didn't feel anxious right now?" Kind of a weird thing to ask yourself, isn't it?! lol... But I sat and pondered it and observed myself... And I had quite an interesting resulting experience and realizations! 🪐 Who am I? I am Natalie White, founder of Saturnish and Shadow Work Coach. I aim to help you, you beautifully and perfectly imperfect human, to see, express, and embrace all that you are- especially those parts you have previously rejected. ⁠⁠⁠⁠Find out more about me and all that I offer⁠⁠⁠⁠ Join me⁠⁠ ⁠⁠here, in my Facebook group, Surrendring to Gravity⁠⁠⁠⁠, and get to know me more personally And if you are enjoying this and other episodes, I'd be so happy if you would ⁠support this podcast⁠, subscribe/follow, and/or leave a review.

What is the meaning of life? Why does anything exist at all? Yes, yes. The "age-old" question. As a lifetime spiritual seeker, this was a question that had always been an itch I could not scratch. So many spiritual teachings would speak to creation and how "god created us all" and all of that... and the best I could ever seem to get out of anything was that it was because god loved us so much. But that never seemed to really answer why the heck any of this exists at all. Yes, we are evolving and one of the answers was that this is the way back to "perfection." But why were we ever not always perfect to begin with?! What is the purpose... the meaning of it all... what is the point of this existing we are all doing?? I did come across an answer that actually felt satisfying to me, though, and that answer and my resulting thoughts and realization are what spurred this particular entry. 🪐 Who am I? I am Natalie White, founder of Saturnish and Shadow Work Coach. I aim to help you, you beautifully and perfectly imperfect human, to see, express, and embrace all that you are- especially those parts you have previously rejected. ⁠⁠⁠Find out more about me and all that I offer⁠⁠⁠ Join me⁠ ⁠⁠here, in my Facebook group, Surrendring to Gravity⁠⁠⁠, and get to know me more personally And if you are enjoying this and other episodes, I'd be so happy if you would support this podcast, subscribe/follow, and/or leave a review.

Trigger warning: This entry includes discussion of suicide and the feelings associated with it. Through these experiences of unreality, where I experienced myself as two separate consciousnesses at the same time, I came to a place where I felt the most profound and painful emptiness. In this space, I viscerally understood what it is that can drive people to commit suicide.  From sitting with and in this feeling… from allowing myself to experience the feeling as an observer, I gained some very deep and meaningful insights about myself, the feeling, and, in a sense, our shadows. (Although I don’t directly speak to the shadow in this entry.) It is so difficult to hold space for these kinds of feelings without losing ourselves in them. But it is necessary if we are able to process and move beyond them.  I understand that there can be a danger in it, so always seek help if and when you need it. Even just talking to a trusted friend can help. Expressing and saying it out loud is more crucial than I can express. Allowing someone else to see you as you are is scary but also super important. It allows us to experience that our true selves CAN be seen and held and accepted. If you need help working through difficult feelings, I can help; schedule an intro session. 🪐 Who am I? I am Natalie White, founder of Saturnish and Shadow Work Coach. I aim to help you, you beautifully and perfectly imperfect human, to see, express, and embrace all that you are- especially those parts you have previously rejected. ⁠⁠Find out more about me and all that I offer⁠⁠ Join me ⁠⁠here, in my Facebook group, Surrendring to Gravity⁠⁠, and get to know me more personally

In my mid 20s, I started to experience something I came to think of as “unreality.” It was a strange feeling that would overtake me without warning, and make me feel like nothing was real. Trying to stay sane and navigate life while in the throws of these bouts was… well, quite challenging! These experiences happened at varying degrees over the span of 3-ish years, as my awareness of myself and what was truly correct for me deepened in ways I did not understand at the time. 🌀 Although it was quite difficult to go through and made me question whether I was quite literally going insane, they are experiences that I now find to be quite valuable because through them, I did learn a lot about myself. And it may not exactly be a beautiful story, like the one about the night that I understood the universe (that was entry #2 and I highly suggest you go listen to that one, too, because it sort of preceded and paved the way for these experiences with unreality)… they are still stories I like to retell because of the lessons that can be taken from them about the nature of consciousness within us and the connection between our conscious and unconscious selves… All from my deeply experiential point of view! 🪐 Who am I? I am Natalie White, founder of Saturnish and Shadow Work Coach. I aim to help you, you beautifully and perfectly imperfect human, to see, express, and embrace all that you are- especially those parts you have previously rejected. ⁠Find out more about me and all that I offer⁠ Join me ⁠here, in my Facebook group, Surrendring to Gravity⁠, and get to know me more personally.

I see people talking about awakening and ascension all the time, and there’s something about it that has always sat kind of wrong with me. There’s an underlying icky feeling that I get from the way that people talk about these concepts, yet I had never quite put my finger on it or put it into words before. On the day that I recorded this voice note, I had come across more than one post explaining what ascension felt like… or how to tell you “are awakening” … stuff like that… And I thought to myself, “What the heck does that even mean??” I see these words used a lot, but they are very mental and conceptual… what does it actually mean to “awaken” or “ascend”?? Like, in PRACTICAL, real terms?? So I felt called to sit and work out my thoughts on the deeper repercussions and reality behind these concepts. As I talked through it, I came to some pretty powerful feelings, connections, and realizations about our humanness… and even connected it with the my previous discussion on the evolution of consciousness! It is a pretty powerful entry, if I do say so myself! ✨ 🪐 Who am I? I am Natalie White, founder of Saturnish and Shadow Work Coach. I aim to help you, you beautifully and perfectly imperfect human, to see, express, and embrace all that you are- especially those parts you have previously rejected. ⁠Find out more about me and all that I offer⁠ Join me ⁠here, in my Facebook group, Surrendring to Gravity⁠, and get to know me more personally.

Lately, I have felt as if my understanding of different spiritual concepts has deepened in quite an interesting way. Through a recent conversation with a friend on the topic of the evolution of consciousness, I was able to tap into answers to questions I had wondered about for many, many years. It just… bubbled up, and somehow I got it… I could under exactly how and why it is true for us to say that “we are the universe experiencing itself.” It was fascinating to ponder this realization about the nature of consciousness and our reality, and I wanted to share it. However, I must say- trying to put words to the deep feelings of understanding I experienced was quite challenging and I am not at all sure I was able to do it all any justice. In all honesty, at this point, I do hope that these thoughts I am sharing here make sense to people who are not in my head!! Haha 🤭 I considered skipping over this particular voice note, for fear that it might seem like nonsense to those who listen in… yet, I do feel that it could be just the missing piece for someone who is ready to hear it. And so I release it to the ethers and let it be what it shall be. 💙 🪐 Who am I? I am Natalie White, founder of Saturnish and Shadow Work Coach. I aim to help you, you beautifully and perfectly imperfect human, to see, express, and embrace all that you are-especially those parts you have previously rejected. Find out more about me and all that I offer Join me here, in my Facebook group, Surrendring to Gravity, and get to know me more personally.

The smallest incidents that we experience as children can have long-lasting effects on our lives... in ways that we aren't even consciously aware of... even with no real memory of those very incidents! I tell a small and silly story from my life about where and how my emotionally charged "belief" that leggings aren't pants came from. It's crazy because it's full of vague impressions and barely remembered happenings... but it packs a powerful lesson and reminder. A call for deeper self-awareness maybe... Our day-to-day moments and fleeting feelings have a lot to teach us, if we can just take the time to shift our conscious back to our present experience and dig into what we could call our vast feeling-inner-world... (don't mind me, just making up words and concepts here 😹) Can you think of a moment in your life that defined a belief you've carried ever since? 🪐 Who am I? I am Natalie White, founder of Saturnish and Shadow Work Coach. I aim to help you, you beautifully and perfectly imperfect human, to see, express, and embrace all that you are- especially those parts you have previously rejected. ⁠⁠Find out more about me and all that I offer⁠⁠ Join me ⁠⁠here, in my Facebook group, Surrendring to Gravity⁠⁠, and get to know me more personally.

One of the biggest lessons that I learned about human interpersonal relationships, I learned from a cat. Crazy right? But it's true. As humans, we have our logical and reasonable brains that hinder certain behaviors for the sake of propriety. Cats do not 🤭😹 And because of this, I got to witness firsthand a fascinating transformation in one little being... when I chose to allow him to just be "who" he was and accept him exactly as such. It made me realize that it's exactly the same with humans... It's just that the layer of complexity added to our interactions by our ability to police and filter our actions makes it a little less obvious. And so... I learned these particular lessons from a cat... 🪐 Who am I? I am Natalie White, founder of Saturnish and Shadow Work Coach. I aim to help you, you beautifully and perfectly imperfect human, to see, express, and embrace all that you are- especially those parts you have previously rejected. ⁠⁠Find out more about me and all that I offer⁠⁠ Join me ⁠⁠here, in my Facebook group, Surrendring to Gravity⁠⁠, and get to know me more personally.