Sobriety Uncensored

Daniel and Jenna talk about how their recovery programs are evolving as their lives and circumstances change. Jenna opens up about this transitional time in her life and how she hasn't felt inspired to commit time or energy to her recovery program. They discuss boredom and discovering new hobbies or ways to have fun. Daniel explains (through some minor technical difficulties) how the change of seasons makes him uncomfortable and the importance of staying focused on recovery during this time.

Daniel and Jenna talk about leading double lives in active addition. They discuss the level of denial they were both in when telling themselves they were successful parents, partners, and professionals while maintaining an unhealthy relationship with alcohol. Daniel shares about recently researching gummies which leads to a discussion about having addictive personalities and how it can sneak in at unexpected times. 

Daniel tells Jenna about a recent mom & daughter gathering at his house that ended with Daniel ubering a couple friends home. They talk about "mommy wine culture" as Jenna recalls some of her play date experiences as a mom of young children. They discuss the mental energy they used to watch, calculate and plan their drinking when trying to fit in with parent functions.

Daniel and Jenna talk about their Labor Day weekends and their ability to navigate last-minute changes to plans. Jenna tells how her weekend abruptly shifted to accommodate her daughter's needs. Daniel talks about gaslighting and tells a story about a recent interaction in which he maintained a professional demeanor without being passive, apologetic, or confrontational.

Daniel recalls the anxiety associated with Labor Day weekend and back-to-school season as a student as well as an educator. He talks about the false promises he would repeatedly make, intending to use Labor Day as a "regroup" day when, in reality, he would continue to rationalize drinking through Monday. Daniel and Jenna discuss academic and social pressures as they relate to their children facing different adolescent phases. Jenna talks about her new-found alone time and the associated challenges with one child now in college and the other spending less and less time at home. 

Daniel and Jenna talk about feelings of underlying rage and how it can sometimes be exacerbated by emotional sobriety and navigating life's conflict without alcohol. They talk about how practicing gratitude, patience, and humility are useful tools for keeping and even mood and practicing conflict resolution. They also discuss Jenna's search for a new AA meeting that meets her recovery needs and how those needs can evolve with time. 

Daniel and Jenna talk about how they incorporated drinking into their lives while fulfilling their responsibilities as professionals, spouses, parents, and friends. They discuss "drunk math" and how they justified their alcoholic behaviors, even when not drinking. 

Jenna and Daniel discuss the thought of staying sober "forever" and how that seems unattainable in early sobriety. They discuss taking sober life as it comes, one challenge at a time, while making adjustments to daily life. They also discuss how they've used community and social media as part of their sober toolbox. 

Daniel and Jenna report back after both being on vacation for the last week. They talk about their past vacation experiences in active addiction, and discuss the relief associated with being worry-free when it comes to the negotiations and calculations. 

Daniel and Jenna talk about people's true intentions when getting sober and using recovery as an "out" in certain situations. They discuss the importance of being careful to protect ones own recovery program while also trying to help someone in need. 

Jenna and Daniel talk about committing to a quit date and the subsequent cycle of promises that we tend to make to ourselves as we justify putting it off. Daniel tells Jenna about a recent discussion with a friend in his 20's who continues to contemplate quitting, and how his social circle can be a roadblock to commitment. They discuss the varying challenges when getting sober at different stages of life.

Daniel and Jenna talk about experiencing major life events as people in recovery and how different they handle such events without alcohol. They discuss "emotional sobriety" and how intensely they can sometimes feel certain life shifts without using alcohol to cope, escape, or celebrate. Jenna talks about feeling irritable or antsy and sometimes forgetting about the added mental toll of staying sober while going through major life changes. Daniel talks about "opposite action" and challenging himself to stay on task and engaged when he's feeling unmotivated or uninspired.

Happy July 4th! Daniel and Jenna talk about "sitting it out" and the choice to accept a potentially boring holiday in exchange for the reward of staying sober. They discuss pressure from family, friends and spouses to match their drinking habits and just try to be "normal", which can lead to dishonesty and manipulation.

Jenna shares about a recent conversation with her son regarding self worth and positive self talk. Jenna and Daniel talk about the life skills they're learning in recovery and how they continue to put them into practice in everyday life. They discuss their own personal need for self-reward in recovery, whether its a simple verbalization of a job well-done, or treating themselves to a sober gift. 

Daniel talks about recently deleting his TikTok account and what a freeing feeling it was to let go of something that was no longer serving him. Daniel and Jenna acknowledge the impact sober TikTok has had on both their sobriety and the positive experiences they have had. They also address the potential for obsessive behavior and the desire for acceptance with social media. They discuss how this decision ties into boundary setting as a necessary part of recovery.

Jenna tells Daniel about some recent milestones her family has experienced and expresses appreciation for her sobriety, and for being fully engaged and emotional. She addresses a brief desire to drink at her daughter's graduation celebration dinner, and Daniel talks about how that is normal, and that it is unrealistic to think you'll never have another craving. They talk about "negative permanent language" and as it applies to sobriety. 

Daniel and Jenna talk about alcohol-free products that have recently become more popular including elixirs, microdose mushroom beverages, and supplements. They discuss their own personal preferences with these products and how they feel it could potentially affect their sobriety. 

Daniel tells Jenna about recently losing power and adjusting his family activities for an evening. They talk about their rationalization to drink in those types of circumstances during active addiction. Jenna talks about how relieved she feels to be able to participate in relaxing activities on her own without the lure of alcohol constantly pulling at her choices. They also discuss the ability to stay awake and alert in the evenings, whether that means giving their children rides to and from activities, being productive at home, or simply relaxing.

Daniel and Jenna talk about "residual shame" as Daniel continues his job search and is faced with some previous acquaintances via social media. They discuss the rationale for amends and how it can sometimes be authentic and sometimes self-serving, and the importance of making that distinction before approaching someone from the past. 

Jenna and Daniel talk about how their sobriety has affected their marriages. Having much different experiences, they share the differences and similarities of how their relationships have evolved as they have discovered their true authentic selves in sobriety.