Still Figuring It Out

Let’s take it back to 19, aka my golden birthday, my golden year. I thought I had it all figured out, but as you’ll hear I was just a teen playing dress up as an adult.

The summer ‘23 vibe is pools not beach, stay safe ❤️

Did you miss me? Let's catch up, grab some wine and listen in on my six-month recap of the good, the bad, and everything in between. Oh, and welcome to season 3.

TW: mentions of eating disorders, suicide, mental illness, and sexual assault. Listener distractions is advised. What better way to get deep and emotional than with some personal questions and drinking wine while already being drunk. I’m back once again with my friend and ex coworker Cintia where we sit in my living room, eat some sushi and finish off another bottle. These were fun and eye opening to answer so thank you for following along, it never not goes appreciated.

Because if the person your dating can’t do dishes or laundry it’s time to pack it up. I’m back again with my good friend Cintia as we comb through our past relationships and situationships the only way we can stomach…with a full glass of wine.

Would you believe it, I finally have a guest on here. And just like the beginning of this episode, it's nothing short of crazy. We get into how we became friends, our many adventures involving bottomless mimosas and creating a human wall to pee at the club, and the reason for this title. Because just like this podcast, we're all still figuring it out. 

If there's one thing that's been there for me this year, it's books. Through my hospital stay, long work days, solo vacation, outpatient program, and move, there wasn't a time my bag didn't have a novel waiting to be opened. So, I thought I'd share with you all the (40) books I read this year and tell you which are worth it and which can be left on the shelf. 

TW: Mentions of sexual assault  Here are some links for resources and ways to donate and help. I'm here for you and love you. https://www.weareplannedparenthoodaction.org/onlineactions/W-dJwYn_Vk-PfTNgWw_EIA2?sourceid=1004273&ms=4NALz2200K1N1A&utm_campaign=NAT_2200_PPFA_Appeal_c4_ad_acq&gclid=CjwKCAjwwdWVBhA4EiwAjcYJEDedtYHzI3gpRu1XmDIZil9twukhcTzOoUJZtp6mLpvyBfvGxKyTABoCU9gQAvD_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds

TW: Mentions of suicide and sexual assault in this episode. If this episode is all over the place, then I'm not sorry. Because sometimes that's how life and especially love can be. And that's what I talk about in this episode. We go into the difference between saying the word "love," versus feeling it and I let you in on a little confession. What that is you may ask? Well, listen and you'll find out. 

Are you surprised I actually lived up to my promise for a new episode this week? Don't worry, unlike that guy, I keep my promises. In this episode, we talk about a lot of things ranging from new shows I've been watching to a new segment called rate my mental health for the week. I go into the idea of learning to appreciate the simpler things in life and how the person I am now is a lot better for me than the person I was living in and for last year. I hope you can take something from this ramble of a chat and I will see you all again next week, that's right you heard that.

hi, I know in this episode I talk about a lot of things. So, I'm not going to make a whole paragraph about it. I just want you to know how thankful I am for anyone who listens to this and how happy I am to finally be back. I promise to never take this long to return again. 

I know I may start off this podcast being very happy and sarcastic, but deep down I'm feeling a lot of different things. I feel guilty, abandoned, sad, confused, angry, lost, out of routine, and just overall overwhelmed. If you listen through this whole episode, thank you. I never imagined in my wildest dreams that I would ever have to utter those words but it's real and it happened and is still happening as I post this. If you take anything away from this episode it's to wear a mask, social distance, stay home if you're not feeling well, and don't be selfish and not think about other people. Thank you for always being there for me, especially in a time like now. 

In this episode, I am probably the most chipper I've been in a while. Why you may ask? I'm on vacation this week. So, I take you along what I've done so far this week which includes seeing friends and loved ones, staying busy, and getting attacked by bees. I then go into the topic for this week: the author Taylor Jenkins Reid. I talk a little about her life and tell you about 3 of her most popular books. Between a Hollywood starlet, a family with a past, or a rock band from the '70s, Reid does it all. Think these stories will be worth the read? You'll have to tune in to find out. 

Hi, you guys. I know it's been a while (2 weeks) since I've last uploaded. So, with nothing planned for this episode, and ginger ale poured into my wine glass I sit down and catch you guys up on where I've been for the better half of August. Between birthday parties, anniversaries, a wedding, and a failed interview there's a lot to talk about. Thank you all so much for your support, and I can't wait to give you new episodes. 

In this episode, I rally through some scorching weather to talk about my past weekend of fun in the sun, overwhelming work days and trying to get through the night without waking up. I then go into the topic, an author you need to know and read. I give a brief overview of who Alex Michaelides is, talk about his two books and tell you why you need to go to your local bookstore, buy them, and read them at the beach. If you need a sign to get back into reading, here is it. 

In this episode, I catch you guys up on my life and what I've been up to. Between some traveling, getting wine drunk, and learning to relax, I come to terms with how I've really been feeling. To be honest, my mental health is not loving me. I go into the topic of the idea that we have to have it all and be "on" all the time. How society and comparing ourselves to others influence us as well as learning to take a pause and not see resting as being lazy. If you need a sign to do just this, I hope this episode can do that for you like it's trying to for me. Thank you so much for sticking around and if you're new, enjoy the ride.

In this episode, I talk about my hectic work week, barely having time to breathe, and why I'm taking a break from drinking. I then go into the topic for this week, the idea of trying to find my "home." Whether it be physical, family, or relationship-wise, I never felt like I had a home in any of those. It took writing it down for me to see it was starting to come along all this time. The beauty of writing. I hope you enjoy this as much and as hard as it was for me to write it.

In this episode, I talk about being a beer slut, not wanting to work out while eating like garbage, and my plans for a rainy Fourth of July weekend. I then go into a new segment: things we need to normalize better, for this episode, it's your 20's. I talk about how my 20's so far have felt like a roller coaster, comparing ourselves and our journeys to others, and list off some things that are totally normal to still be happening in our 20's. There is no time clock for when you have to complete everything in your life, just enjoy the ride and breathe. 

Happy summer, I can't believe I've made it halfway through the year. I would like to thank the alcohol. In this episode, I talk about a really fun past weekend, hating my body, and getting back into reading. I then tell you what books you should read this summer (myself included) and have a little book club moment with you guys. I've always loved reading in the summer because I love to overly romanticize things in my life and one of those is reading. I hope you enjoy these recommendations and read some yourself. Always remember, you may not be the main character in the book, but you are in your life. 

In this episode, we're getting emotional so bring all the tissues. I talk about the stressful and overwhelming time I've been having. My week of drinking, spending time with loved ones, a zoo visit, and a Taylor announcement that made it all better. I then go into the topic of why I don't celebrate Father's Day. I talk about my childhood and growing up with an alcoholic and abusive father, how it's affected me growing up and how I'm doing now. I then read some articles I wrote addressing him. I wouldn't be the person I am today if it wasn't for him leaving and not being in my life for over half of it. We do a good job at perceiving others the way we want to on the outside when we have too much damage inside us. If you can relate to this episode, I want you to know I see you and I'm here for you.