Tentpole Trauma

After acquiring Lucasfilm in 2012, Disney was banking big on a 5th installment of the beloved and lucrative Indiana Jones franchise. After years of development and the passing of the torch from original director Steven Spielberg to the capable James Mangold, Harrison Ford — now in his late 70s — agreed to don the whip and fedora for one last adventure. Unfortunately the resulting Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny bombed hard at the box office to the tune of an estimated 100 million dollar loss. Join Sebastian, Chris and Rodney as they turn back time, dust off some ancient tombs and wrestle with the world-altering consequences of this dial of disaster. 

Sony had been looking to resurrect the Ghostbusters for the big screen for decades, but after many failed attempts, a full reboot finally materialized in 2016. But toxic fans were upset about director Paul Feig’s decision to go with an all female team, and despite an A-list cast featuring Kristen Wiig, Melissa McCarthy, Kate McKinnon and Leslie Jones the film failed to scare up the box office numbers the studio was hoping for. Join Sebastian, Jen and Steve as they cross streams to determine if these ghostbusting gals deserve to be relegated to the franchise’s afterlife.

With video game adaptations raking in big coin at the box office, adapting the popular Borderlands series to screen seemed a no-brainer. But even pairing a puzzling high-profile cast—featuring Cate Blanchette, Kevin Hart, Jamie Lee Curtis and Jack Black—with a jokey and colorful Guardians of the Galaxy sci fi vibe didn’t help Eli Roth’s beleaguered directorial effort connect with fans or ticket buyers. Join Sebastian and Steve as they comb the junkyard wastes of Pandora (no, not that Pandora) for any pleasures they can salvage from this muddled, madcap mess.

Following the commercial disappointment of the oppressively downbeat Alien 3, it stands to reason that 1997’s follow-up, Alien Resurrection, would attempt to recapture the fun, bug-hunt thrills of James Cameron’s Aliens. And while French auteur director Jean-Pierre Jeunet certainly lightened the mood—credited in part to the quippy, Joss Whedon-penned script—audiences were puzzled by this strange newborn, even with series heroine Sigourney Weaver returning and a solid supporting cast featuring Winona Ryder and Ron Perlman. Join Sebastian, Chris and Steve as they clone themselves 8 times, laser some whiskey cubes and lovingly cradle this bizarre hybrid of sci fi and French comedy/satire.

The late 90s found Kevin Costner on a serious losing  streak following high profile post apocalyptic flops Waterworld and The Postman, so it made sense that he would retreat to a sub-genre that had batted a thousand for him previously, the baseball drama. But despite the confident direction of a pre-Spider-Man Sam Raimi and a stellar supporting cast, For Love of the Game still struck out at the box office. Join Sebastian and Andrew as they take themselves out to the ballpark and see if this treacly romance is truly a no-hitter.

After Scream made him a semi-household name, David Arquette was poised for leading man status. Unfortunately, the first film he chose to lead was Eight Legged Freaks, a comedic, atomic age horror throwback featuring giant CGI spiders and Kari Wuhrer as his co-lead. But does this box office dud  have the power to catch Sebastian and Jennifer in its web of creature feature charm? Tune in and find out!

The Universal Monsters franchise has seen numerous failed re-launches over the years, but after Leigh Whannell’s Invisible Man hit big back in 2020, hopes were high that he could do the same for the Wolf Man. Sadly, despite a solid cast featuring Julia Garner and Christopher Abbot, the film could not overcome the stench of failure after a poorly received costume leak and lackluster trailers, resulting in tepid reviews and box office grosses. Join Sebastian, Jennifer and Rodney as they get down with the sickness and try to find the lycanthrope in this de-fanged failure.

After the meteoric success of Spider-Man and Spider-Man 2, director Sam Raimi was poised to deliver another knockout with the franchise’s 3rd entry. Sadly, despite incredible success at the box office, Spider-Man 3 was met with a venomous reception from critics and fans, and the series was rebooted a few years later. Join Sebastian and Jennifer as they put their black suits and guyliner on and reappraise this much maligned Spider-threequel.

Despite the enduring popularity of  Spider-Man, Sony’s attempt to build a universe around the character’s rogue’s gallery—without the inclusion of Spidey himself— has, Venom movies aside, been an unmitigated disaster. Sadly, the Aaron Taylor Johnson led Kraven the Hunter continues that trend, but is it truly a pointless safari? Join Sebastian and Matt as they consume a little voodoo potion, put on their lion’s mane vests and get to cravin’ some Kraven.

Groundhog Day meets alien invasion seems a sure fire high concept pitch; add megastar Tom Cruise into the equation and you would assume a box office smash. And yet, despite this and a strong critical reception, Doug Liman’s Edge of Tomorrow met with a lackluster response, despite mech suits, Emily Blunt and innovative alien design. Join Sebastian, Chris and Rodney as they Live, Die and Repeat this movie over and over and over until they figure out why this wasn’t a huge box office hit.

Todd Philips' 2019 Joker took the world by storm, earning over a billion in box office receipts and winning star Joaquin Phoenix the Oscar. A sequel seemed all but inevitable, so when one was announced, and with pop superstar Lady Gaga in the role of Joker love-interest Harley Quinn, the stage was set for another smash hit. But the film's musical format and thematic departures did not entice audiences, resulting in a critical and commercial disaster. Join Sebastian and Chris from The Movie In Your Mind podcast as they slather on some greasepaint, strike up the band and try to find some point to this muddled, misbegotten musical mess.

Expectations for a sequel were sky high following the monumental success of Tim Burton’s Batman, hype only exacerbated by the addition of Michelle Pfeiffer and Danny DeVito to the cast. And while 1992’s Batman Returns was not a box office disappointment, the grotesque nature of DeVito’s Penguin coupled with the S&M appeal of Pfeiffer’s vinyl-clad Catwoman didn’t make family audiences or the toy companies very happy. Join Sebastian and Jennifer in decking the halls of Gotham for this holiday classic and arguably most delightfully twisted of all the Batman films.

Less a directorial effort than a vehicle for his pop singer daughter, M. Night Shyamalan's latest high concept thriller, Trap, features Josh Hartnett in a cat and mouse game taking place at the concert of a Taylor Swift-style fictional diva. Does Night manage to recapture the magic of his Sixth Sense glory days, or is the nauseating nepotism on display coupled with a crushing parade of implausibilities too much for a hapless audience to bear? Join Sebastian and Rodney for this special mini-episode discussion on what could be the year's worst mainstream movie.

M.Night Shyamalan’s career was in the dumpster after the release of 2010’s The Last Airbender, so hitching his spaceship to superstar Will Smith seemed a smart move for his next project, 2013’s After Earth. Unfortunately the film proved more an excuse for nepotism as Smith was sidelined for his son Jayden, and rumors of Scientology’s alleged involvement didn’t help its prospects with audiences and critics. Join Sebastian and Rodney as they argue the merits of flying squirrel suits, cgi monkeys and this mess of a post apocalyptic father son adventure. 

After successfully resurrecting “The Shape” for Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers in 1988, producer and overlord Moustapha Akkad demanded a sequel the following year. The resulting film, boasting the Revenge of Michael Myers, was met with fan backlash and disappointment at the box office, falling to capitalize on the previous film’s murderous momentum. Join Sebastian and Bloody Bits co-host Matt Anderson as they carve into this misguided jack o lantern and revel in one of the long running franchise’s more hysterical entries.

The early aughts saw Stephen Sommers riding high with the Universal monsters following the success of his Mummy films, so it seemed only natural that he would try his hand with a straight-up monster mash that featured Dracula, Frankenstein, and the Wolf Man. The result was Van Helsing, a Hugh Jackman star vehicle that made money at the box office but failed to kickstart a franchise thanks to tepid reviews and the violent rejection of fans. Join Sebastian, Jennifer and Rodney as they scream into spooky season with a lively debate over the vampiric value of this ludicrously bombastic blockbuster.

Jan de Bont’s remake of the 1963 Robert Wise classic promised to take The Haunting of Hill House into the new millennium, boasting state of the art special effects and an A-list cast. Unfortunately it also boasted a clunky script, ridiculous production design and CGI overload that robbed Shirley Jackson’s seminal ghost story of all of its terror and dread. Join Sebastian and Jennifer as they summon the spirit of Hugh Crain and question their sanity for watching this misguided misfire more than any sane couple should.

Riding high off of their Lethal Weapon partnership, filmmaker Richard Donner and star Mel Gibson had every reason to believe their high concept action thriller Conspiracy Theory would be a success. And with the help of superstar Julia Roberts, a villainous turn by Patrick Stewart and a script by Oscar winner Brian Helgeland, it was, at least modestly so. Get to the bottom of why Sebastian and The Mighty Peculiar podcast’s Matt Anderson are covering this problematic in hindsight, brain boiling entry in the 90s thriller genre.

Fans of the 20th Century Fox mutant superhero series were anxious to see the backstory of fan-favorite character Wolverine explained, so Gavin Hood’s prequel X-Men Origins: Wolverine landed with a box office bang in 2009. But despite a successful financial run, the film was lambasted by fans and critics for its shoddy special effects, mistreatment of beloved characters (including a disastrous debut for Ryan Reynold’s Deadpool) and some truly baffling story choices. Join Sebastian and Jennifer as they go full adamantium claws out on this misshapen mutant misfire and show gratitude for the recent corrective of Deadpool & Wolverine.

George Miller’s gonzo, post apocalyptic masterpiece Mad Max: Fury Road stunned audiences in 2015, earning widespread praise and cult status. But despite that goodwill, strong reviews and the presence of stars Anya Taylor Joy and Chris Hemsworth, Miller’s prequel Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga stalled terribly at the box office this Memorial Day. Join Sebastian and Jennifer as they discuss the pitfalls of prequels, questionable character choices and their love of the world building in the Mad Max universe.