That's Not How I'd Do It

That's Not How I'd Do It, the podcast where we tackle the most pressing issues in the world, fight over what went wrong, and come up with solutions so crazy they just might work.

79: Elon Musk

What do you give a man who has it all? Trick question! You don't give him anything. You take it away and make him start over, rebuilt in the #SNOTBOYZ image. Look out Elon, we're going to turn you from Bruce Wayne billionaire playboy into George Clooney wearing a rubber nipple suit Batman! If you have any suggestions for future episodes, go ahead and tweet to us at @thatsnotpod. You can also drop us a line at thatsnotpod@gmail.com. Podcast the change you want to see in the world. A special thanks this week to the Oracle of Omaha for being a loving husband to two wives.

11-20
51:13

78: Jigsaw from Saw

This episode we tackle John Kramer, AKA the Jigsaw killer. Star of Saw, Saw 2, Saw 3, Saw 4, Saw 5, Saw 6, and the titular character in Jigsaw. Here are some choice excerpts from his wikipedia entry: "By Saw III, John is on his death bed and extremely concerned over whether or not Amanda has what it takes to continue his legacy, as the traps she designs are inescapable." "After explaining that this is Jeff's final test of forgiveness, Jeff slices John's throat with a power saw." "Saw IV opens with John's autopsy, during which a wax-coated tape is found in his stomach." "More flashbacks set prior to the events of the first film reveal that John targeted health insurance executive William Easton for one of his games, because he had denied two-thirds of all applicants health coverage, due to a flawed policy, including John himself." Cool right? If you have any suggestions for future episodes, go ahead and tweet to us at @thatsnotpod. You can also drop us a line at thatsnotpod@gmail.com. Podcast the change you want to see in the world. A special thanks this week to all of our accomplices.

10-31
51:42

77: Campfire Stories

Grab yourself some hot chocolate and join us by the fire at the base of K2 for a "typical campfire scenario." The scariest part of this episode is the way James uses a sleeping bag. If you have any suggestions for future episodes, go ahead and tweet to us at @thatsnotpod. You can also drop us a line at thatsnotpod@gmail.com. Podcast the change you want to see in the world. A special thanks this week to all the teenagers who have died to maintain suspense.

10-14
01:13:02

76: Witches

"Down vith children! Do them in! Boil their bones and fry their skin! Bish them, sqvish them, bash them, mash them! Brrreak them, shake them, slash them, smash them!" -Roald Dahl If you have any suggestions for future episodes, go ahead and tweet to us at @thatsnotpod. You can also drop us a line at thatsnotpod@gmail.com. Podcast the change you want to see in the world. A special thanks this week to all the children dressing up as witches for Halloween, please don't turn us into trolls.

10-03
37:00

75: Haunted Houses

Hello boils and ghouls, and welcome to another episode of Bats Not Howl I’d Boo It, the podcast where we find the spookiest problems in the world today, argue over what went wrong, and make them even scarier! Today, we take tour of a haunted house and see if we can afford the MORGUE-age. If not we may need to look in a more affordable SLAY-borhood! Hee hee hee hee hee!!! This week we'd like to apologize to Sam's brother-in-law, Greg.

09-27
43:33

74: Boy Bands

The Snot Boyz are back (alright!), and also want you back, as long as you don't go breaking our snotty little hearts by saying bye bye bye. This week we look into what a boy band marketed to 30-somethings would be like. Spoiler: amazing. If you have any suggestions for future episodes, go ahead and tweet to us at @thatsnotpod. You can also drop us a line at thatsnotpod@gmail.com. Podcast the change you want to see in the world. A special thanks this week to original boy band, those boys with the lovable mop-tops: The Beatles.

09-05
54:01

73: Labor Day

Today we celebrate Labor Day by waking up late, dropping our kids off to school, and burning down the Walton family yacht. Happy Labor Day! If you have any suggestions for future episodes, go ahead and tweet to us at @thatsnotpod. You can also drop us a line at thatsnotpod@gmail.com. Podcast the change you want to see in the world. A special thanks this week to all you cute little laborers. Now quit dillydallying and get back to work!

08-28
50:33

72: Office Politics

Dear Sir or Madam, Apologies for the delay in getting this podcast to you. For the past month, we've been stuck in a "quick morning meeting." Please see attached for the bullet points. Sincerely, THE SNOTBOYZ If you have any suggestions for future episodes, go ahead and tweet to us at @thatsnotpod. You can also drop us a line at thatsnotpod@gmail.com. Podcast the change you want to see in the world. A special thanks this week to the mail room, for handling James's package(s).

08-11
46:06

71: Mating

Welcome to a very sensual and erotic episode of the podcast. The one that puts the "Do It" in "That's Not How I'd Do It." And by "do it" we mean sex. This one really gets the juices flowing guys. Go ahead and draw a bath, light a candle, put your earbuds in, and prepare to listen to the Snotboyz and their guest Leslie Jones talk about the sex lives of seahorses. Boi-oi-oi-oi-ing! Ooh Papi! If you have any suggestions for future episodes, go ahead and tweet to us at @thatsnotpod. You can also drop us a line at thatsnotpod@gmail.com. Podcast the change you want to see in the world. A special thanks this week to clams.

07-12
01:07:27

70: The World Cup

Never know how much I love you / Never know how much I care / When you put your net around me / I get a world cup fever that's so hard to bear / You give me fever / When you kick me / Fever when you dribble me tight / Fever / In the scoring, a fever all through the IT'S WORLD CUP TIME AND I'VE GOT THE FEVER SWEATS! If you have any suggestions for future episodes, go ahead and tweet to us at @thatsnotpod. You can also drop us a line at thatsnotpod@gmail.com. Podcast the change you want to see in the world. A special thanks this week to our favorite face biter out there: Luis Suarez. Buena suerte.

07-03
53:11

69: Dads

Happy Father's Day! If you have any suggestions for future episodes, go ahead and tweet to us at @thatsnotpod. You can also drop us a line at thatsnotpod@gmail.com. Podcast the change you want to see in the world. A special thanks this week to our wonderful dads. We promise to take out the trash right after this episode. We miss you, Mike.

06-21
48:05

68: Gun Control

Sometimes we talk about things that aren't funny. If you have any suggestions for future episodes, go ahead and tweet to us at @thatsnotpod. You can also drop us a line at thatsnotpod@gmail.com. Podcast the change you want to see in the world. A special thanks this week to the gun control activists who are actually fighting for some real change in the world.

05-25
52:14

67: Religion Part 3

Good evening! Do you have a moment to talk about the Haboo, the God with Two Heads? What is that? Pesto? Smells amazing. I sincerely hope I'm not interrupting. I promise that just a few minutes of your time today could change your life for the better. Or it maybe for the worse. It's really not my place to say. Alls I know is that I have this ski mask and this baseball bat here, and it'd be a real shame if I didn't make my conversion quota today. I'm not saying it's gonna turn out bad for you, I'm just saying that misfortune has a real way of following me around. What can I say. It's my "curse" or something. Anyway, I'm gonna practice my swing over here in the living room and you give it some thought. Take your time. I've got all day. If you have any suggestions for future episodes, go ahead and tweet to us at @thatsnotpod. You can also drop us a line at thatsnotpod@gmail.com. Podcast the change you want to see in the world. A special thanks this week to Saint Alanis.

05-17
50:09

66: Religion Part 2

As fortune and misfortune continue their back and forth struggle forever, James decides it's time to set up the Church of Haboo and make a tidy profit, Sam receives an unwanted call, and Jared is...well...Jared. Step forth into part two of our three part groundbreaking series on religion as we discuss what goes into making a Church for Habooism. If you have any suggestions for future episodes, go ahead and tweet to us at @thatsnotpod. You can also drop us a line at thatsnotpod@gmail.com. Podcast the change you want to see in the world. A special thanks this week to our beloved sentient Thumb of Haboo, Ape Raham Lincoln.

05-02
59:31

65: Religion Part 1

In the beginning Haboo created the Heavens and the Earth and a dope casino. Darkness was over the surface of all that crud, and Haboo was hovering over it thinking, "I need to put a buffet up in this bish." And Haboo said, β€œLet it be lit,” and it was super fucking lit. Lil Pump was playing. People were dabbing. Michael B. Jordan had the Killmonger haircut and was making out with everyone. The opioid crisis was over. There was even free IN-N-OUT. Damn. If you have any suggestions for future episodes, go ahead and tweet to us at @thatsnotpod. You can also drop us a line at thatsnotpod@gmail.com. Podcast the change you want to see in the world. A special thanks this week to the two-headed dragon god.

04-24
01:01:35

64: Spirit Quests

I'll be honest with you guys, I just haven't been feeling like my usual podcast-self recently. Same routine week-in, week-out; I don't really like getting beers with the other podcasts after work but I feel obligated to; I might be in a bit of a slump. What's a podcast to do? It's not like I can just pack it all up and discover my true self....or can I? If you have any suggestions for future episodes, go ahead and tweet to us at @thatsnotpod. You can also drop us a line at thatsnotpod@gmail.com. Podcast the change you want to see in the world. A special thanks this week to the queen of spirit quests, Elizabeth Gilbert!

04-04
42:05

63: Bachelor Parties

Cue incessant car noise! The snotboyz hit the road this week on the way to a bachelor party. Did somebody order flapjacks??? If you have any suggestions for future episodes, go ahead and tweet to us at @thatsnotpod. You can also drop us a line at thatsnotpod@gmail.com. Podcast the change you want to see in the world. A special thanks this week to our very special bachelor boy.

03-28
37:49

62: Gyms

LET'S GET PUMPED!!!!! This week we hit the weights and program the treadmill to the maximum shame setting. So get off your lazy ass, drink a protein shake, and give a quick spot while we do some serious heavy lifting - of the mind.... If you have any suggestions for future episodes, go ahead and tweet to us at @thatsnotpod. You can also drop us a line at thatsnotpod@gmail.com. Podcast the change you want to see in the world. A special thanks this week to the godfather of fitness, Jack LaLanne.

03-13
40:09

61: Academy Awards

Welcome to the 90th Academy Awards, where we will bore you between nominees, award the wrong films, and allow people you don't really care about a national platform to thank their parents. Just kidding! We've fixed the Oscars, and without spoiling anything lets just say the Filmuminati is ready to blow your collective viewing minds. If you have any suggestions for future episodes, go ahead and tweet to us at @thatsnotpod. You can also drop us a line at thatsnotpod@gmail.com. Podcast the change you want to see in the world. A special thanks this week to Tom Hanks for grace under pressure.

02-27
52:54

60: Black Mirror Theme Song

Look at the world. Look at how we've left it. The planet is on fire. Democratic governments have become the lapdogs of the wealthy. The thirst for entertainment has become our only unifying value. Did you think it would turn out like this? Of course not. No one told you life was gonna be this way. Your job's a joke, you're broke, your love life's D.O.A. It's like you're always stuck in second gear. When it hasn't been your day, your week, your month, or even your year, but I'll be there for you when the rain starts to pour. I'll be there for you like I've been there before. I'll be there for you 'cause you're there for me too. In the wreckage of this world, the only thing we have left is each other. God help us. If you have any suggestions for future episodes, go ahead and tweet to us at @thatsnotpod. You can also drop us a line at thatsnotpod@gmail.com. Podcast the change you want to see in the world. A special thanks this week to Charlie Booker and Paul F. Tompkins.

02-15
24:38

Apple Betty

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08-19 Reply

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