The Art of Connection. Woman to Woman, Heart to Heart

[00:00] The past, how do you view it? How does it impact your life? Do you find yourself dwelling there with sweet memories or perhaps the past haunts you with regrets or the what ifs or should have been? The past is powerful. It can be wielded as a powerful tool for growth or conserve as shackles keeping us in bondage, impaired and imprisoned and preventing us from living a joy filled life. I liked this quote. Past is a place of reference, not a place of residence. Does this quote resonate with you? Your unique past can be used as a reference point to learn and grow or are you residing there in the past hidden away with memories, both sweet and bitter. The past it raises its head often and tries to loudly declared that this is the way it is, the past. It can be used as a tool for shame to slither in with regret and condemnation impacting life now and the future. [01:14] The past use this way serves no purpose but to ensnare and entangle each of us preventing us from living life on purpose and in our purpose. Ann Voskamp says that no amount of regret changes the past and no amount of anxiety changes the future. Sandra Vernon here and you are listening to the art of connection. On today's podcast, I will be talking about how the past can be used as a reference point while living in the present, as it also impacts the future. So the past. What comes to mind when you think of the past? Are you thinking of your time as a new bride or in a new career or perhaps further back to your school days? Perhaps you think about your time as a mom, joyous times yet often filled with regret because you wish you would've done this or that differently. With each memory. The question often arises as to why did I do this thing this way? [02:22] Or why didn't I do this thing this way? Why did I allow my children to have smartphones so early? Why didn't die allow my children to have smartphones earlier? Why didn't I push my children to stick with learning music? Why did I push my children's stick? With learning music, you get the idea, the past dredges up wise, which really there's no answer except that you did or you didn't do that particular thing at that moment. It's in the past. There's no answer to the why and it's okay because I am convinced that we do our best at the moment and each season of our life. Hindsight, looking back, as the saying goes, it's always perfect. It's always 20 slash 20 vision. Looking back on the past, there is more clarity, and I'll talk about this more in a bit, but looking on the fat back on the past, it does not do any good to ask the why questions. [03:30] There's no real opportunity for growth with the why questions, why keeps us stuck in regret and oftentimes with that regret is shame. The question that does help in looking at the past as your reference point, the question that does help are the ones that start with what? What can I learn from this experience in the past? What insight might I glean from this situation? How might I have done things differently and what can be applied to the now? Because no amount of regret, the asking the why questions, why did this happen, why did I do this? Why didn't this happen? No amount of those questions or those regrets will change the past, but only further wound our soul, the past. It impacts the person you have become just as water flows through a canyon. Over time it carves out the channels whether deeper or wider. [04:36] So to the past, it creates channels in our soul that run deep and wide. If we focus on it too much, and here's what I'm suggesting for us today, not to live life. Looking back, can you imagine driving and using only your rear view mirror to drive? It would be catastrophic. So my suggestion is that we live life forward. We learned from looking back, but we are designed to live life forward. You and I can always look back and think of the myriad ways we could have done things differently. This is where the hindsight is 20 slash 20. You now have more information, more wisdom, more experience now than you did in the past. So of course you may have done things differently given the opportunity, but how does that help you? Now? It doesn't. It does nothing but keep you in slaved to regret. [05:39] So here's what I suggest. Look back on the past, if the memories are fond and sweet and bring you joy, enjoy them. Let the emotions at the time in the past be felt, but then move on, pondering sweet memories when they letting them cut the deep and wide suite channels of memory to visit and enjoy, but even with sweet memories, we are not to linger away our life living in the past and the parts of your past at bring you pain and I'm convinced we all have pain in our past. I would like to suggest that you allow yourself to visit the emotions, feel them, perhaps even share this with a trusted friend or a wise and trusted counselor, but do not navigate your life in these painful places. Do not live in the past. Have regrets. Do not reside here in the past. That is not what leads for the past is a reference point from which we learn. [06:46] It's not a place to reside, and when you live in the past, especially the negative, painful past, your world becomes smaller. Your life becomes more entangled with bitter emotions that should not have the power it does over you. When you must visit the past as a reference point, remember, that's all it is, a point of reference from which to learn and not to question why. If we try and reside in the past, the entanglement, the stories we begin to create or retail ourselves and embellish harms and wounds our soul, so rather than residing in the past, we must use it as a reference point and then ask ourselves, what might I have done differently that I can apply to my life living forward? What can I learn from this event in the past? How might I develop more empathy for others who are now going through what I went through in the past? [07:53] What choices are before me now that my past will help me make a decision? And if seeking forgiveness is necessary, then do that. Sometimes it is appropriate to go to the person with sincerity and face to face asked for forgiveness. In other cases, it might require a phone call or a letter because of distance, but I strongly advise against direct messaging or texts or any other quick electronic way to communicate that request for forgiveness. If you do not think it wise to seek the personnel you wounded because there may be a real possibility of wounding them again by dredging up things they wanted left alone. Perhaps just write a letter to them with no intention to send it and then ceremonially destroy it. Don't let regret and bitterness holds you in the past by not seeking forgiveness and if you need to forgive someone, do that. [08:58] Forgiveness doesn't mean that you forget the pain a person caused you, but rather that you are no longer choosing to allow that person that caused you pain to have power over you, that you are no longer replaying in your mind the consequences. They should suffer for the pain they called you, caused you, and I can say most of the people who caused me pain, really deep pain are not even aware they had yet, if I remain mired in the past, the pain and flipped it on me in the past wounds me still, the only way to relinquish this power over me is to forgive and then I interest God to take care of the rest and this whole process. It's always better together. Seek out that trusted friend, perhaps read her the letter you want to send and either have her help her edit it, toned down the intensity and harshness and unnecessary verbiage will whittling it down until it just a concise message that needs to be conveyed and send it or most of the time, just destroy it. When you destroy the letter, you have the satisfaction of your friend who entered into your pain and you've been heard and understood. [10:24] I have done this time again, time and again, I've poured out on paper, my pain, my rage, my wound, my hurts. I poured it out until it was empty. Of all the bitter emotions, I allowed myself to feel all the emotions and did not judge myself as I felt them. I just poured it all out and after I finished I will then take the letter out to a our fire pit and ceremonially burnet symbolizing that I was done with this part of the past. I wasn't gonna live it any longer [11:01] and if I felt compelled I would then write a wise minded letter keeping the emotions of the past in check. Even then I would not send this letter, the mild version until I had someone read it and edit it or advise that I just burn it to and leave it be. It is a fine balance of when you share and when not to, but I found it. I find it so powerful just to pour my emotions out on paper if only for the purpose of getting it all spilled out on paper and then destroying it. So it is that fine balance of when to share and when not to. When it is beneficial for the recipient and when it is not. In most of my personal cases, I have found it's better to pour out pain on paper and then just ceremonially burn it to ashes and then let the past be. [12:00] If it rears its ugly head again and I've had that happened, I remind myself that it is gone. It's but ashes, and on the very infrequent occasion I go through that whole process again of pouring it all out on paper and I love ceremonies. They are important to life ending chapters, starting new ones, burning those words of painful past. Turning the words to ashes is Cathartic for me and I returned to [inaudible], cancel quote, and I'll finish it. No amount of regret changes the past. No amount of amount of anxiety changes the future and she ends with any amount of gratefulness. Changes the present. My dialysis say it also impacts our future and heels are passed. So I am this podcast thinking of you, dear listener, don't let the past of your life rule you. Don't let your past rob you of the joy for the future. [13:05] Use your past only as a tool

Do you ever feel out of control? Sometimes? Do you get frustrated with the things you attempt to control, knowing or quickly realizing that you can only do your part and cannot control the entire situation? Control when we feel out of control or have no control over certain things, we become frustrated, irritated on, done. On today's podcast, the issue of control is the topic. I'm Sandra Vernon and you are listening to the art of connection, so I'm today's topic. I'll be speaking about control out of control or in control. It is a stressor of life until you realize this secret. This is a good news and bad news scenario. Okay? Sounds a bit crazy. I know, but hang in there with me. The whole issue of control is just a perspective shift. Really. That's all it is. I want to challenge you to make a perspective shift cleaned to the perspective that it is good news, that there is not a whole lot in your life. You and I can control. That's really good news. It lets us off the hook. How is that you ask? Well, as we let ourselves off the hook from being a champion for every cause, from taking care of everyone's problems, from attempting to control everything in our realm, we learned this as really good news because there's a whole lot in life that is not within our control though we'd like to and those things that are not in control or in our control. Those are the things that bring us frustrations. So for instance, we cannot control how our children behave 100 percent of the time. I'm sure many of you have experienced like I have going to a diner or to a party and only having your children behave in a way you know you did not teach them to behave or we can't control how our spouse interacts in social events. They may say certain things or do certain things that us we're. We're thinking, oh my goodness, why did he or she do that, but it's not in our control or it's not in our control how politics are done or how people treat one another and the list goes on. I would like. I would imagine you can think of more scenarios of things we would like to control, but we can't, so what is within our control, a very powerful bit is within our control. It is so powerful. It makes changes to our life in our thinking. So what is within our control, our thought life. This is within our control, how we manage our thought life is within our control and our response to life circumstances and life's happenings and the outcomes in life. This to a degree is within our control. How we respond to each of these circumstances, happenings or outcomes. We can control our response. We can control our thought life and we can control what we're going to fill our thought life width. So we are each in charge of our thought life. We each are in charge of how we will manage our thoughts and how we will fill our minds. What Diet will we feed our minds and our brains. This is within our control and how we respond to these things. This too is within our control and that's really good news. The things we can control are amazingly powerful things and we can to a degree control how we spend our time. We can control our thoughts and our responses and the actions that follow our thoughts, which leads me to the three key words as it applies directly and specifically to our individual lives. Here are the three perspective changing words. Remember, these three words apply to our thoughts, our responses, our actions. So what are these three words? I am responsible, responsible for my thought life, responsible for my actions and responsible in my response to circumstances and outcomes. These are the areas of life that are within our ability to control and therefore we can say, I am responsible, I am responsible for my thought life and what I fill my mind with. I am responsible for my actions and how I choose to treat others. I am responsible and it is within my control to determine my response. In any given circumstance, I am responsible for how I will spend the 24 hours given to me each day. Those are pretty powerful things that we are in control of and it will change our life. So more good news I hear by relieve you of the idea that you must be in control of and responsible for everyone else. I encourage you to work on the areas of your life that you can control. You can choose what to think on, what brain food are you feeding, your hungry mind? We can fill it with dark and angry things. There is certainly an open buffet menu of that around us or we can fill and feed your mind with positive things, true things, things that edify and build up. One another encouraging and helpful things that help us grow. We can choose what to listen to and what we will fill our mind. For instance, what type of music with its powerful message do you choose? Listened carefully to the words, what type of podcast? What type of opinion journalism do we pay attention to? These all impact our minds. What I'm suggesting is something that must be practiced just as our physical bodies need nourishment to function well and enjoy good health. So to our minds and science confirms what we already know, that our mind and our bodies are interlinked. Her body's in a sense our Avatar, while our mind, our soul indwells, our Avatar, how we care for our body, or we can call it our Avatar, impacts our mind and soul, just as what we fill our minds impacts our soul and how we move about life in our body, beaten down with stinking thinking is eventually revealed in the care of our body, such as never really getting dressed, not walking about with confidence and joy. Stinking thinking is within our control to exterminate, but like any extermination project, it takes work. So choose how you will respond to any given situation. It's a mindset that we must practice and make a choice to do. This is not to say that you must anticipate each situation, but that you purpose to respond in a positive light rather than the worst case scenario or a negative light. And oftentimes this means pausing before responding. So let me give you an example or two from my life. For instance, if I expect a friend to call me back, ready with some news and, and, uh, perhaps having some kind of social plans and she doesn't call me, I can immediately jumped to, oh great. She doesn't really care about me. She's angry with me. Um, I'm not that important to her or I can pause and think she's probably busy. Perhaps something came up. Perhaps there's an illness in her family. This is where I can choose how I'm going to respond to a situation that's out of my control. I don't know why she didn't call, but I did take the time to respond in a way, putting myself into her story and what may have been. I'm learning that to take the time to stop and think before I respond makes a huge difference. And also I'm finding the practice of putting myself in to that other person's story helps also stopping and thinking in a way, walking in their shoes before I respond or jump to negative conclusions. So I purpose in my mind to respond in a way that's going to be in a positive light and perhaps be empathetic towards what my friend might be going through so we can also choose how we will spend our days. There are commitments such as work and childcare and we need time for sleep and nutrition. We choose how to fill the hours of myths, these commitments, and it's amazing to find that we actually have many hours that we can choose how to spend time and how we're going to fill our minds. I like to suggest to my ladies with a face society to do a daily delight and this is something that I am encourage women to continue to do. Why? Because it's not only good for us physically and mentally, but it also nourishes our soul, that the challenge is to pursue 20 minutes of delight each day and it pays off in huge debit dividends as well as it affects those around you. The daily delight challenge simply requires you do something for 20 sustained minutes, something that you enjoy. It could be reading a book, watching a movie, sitting on a park bench and enjoying the fresh air or out with a friend for coffee. Do something that you can delight in each and every day and watch how your mind shift changes. In essence, you are getting your cup filled so you can pour it out into others' lives. It's not a selfish endeavor. It's actually a very positive good endeavor. This daily delight pursuit, so daily delight. This too is within our control. It is a choice to add it to how you will spend some of your 24 hours and it's just 20 minutes choices. In summary, the things that are in our control are what we will think on, how we will respond, what words will we use? How will we spend our days and the actions or deeds within our days. So what will you think on affirmations? If you were to journal all your thoughts, what might you find? Are they positive life giving and life building thoughts? Just think of some of the self talk you do. Do you honor and celebrate your daily accomplishments regardless of the size and scope, or do you more often remind yourself of a negative messages heard through the years or do you remind yourself that I didn't get anything done? I only got the laundry folded. Celebrate that to begin the practice and cultivation of positive thoughts. I like to use index cards with statements that encouraged me. We need to speak to ourselves as we speak to others that we care about in a positive, uplifting, building up manner. It takes practice. For instance, with exercise and affirmation. Every day I exercise, I get stronger and more healthy and not this not this message. I need to exercise so I won't be or stay fat. That's a negative statement or this affirmation. I will read one song and one proverb each day. Not this. Don't say this to yourself. I haven't yet done this, but I need to do this so I'm a better person or I should get to this every day. Don't make it a should. Make it a positive affirmation. I will read one song and one proverb each day to bu

Transitions are a part of life. We each go through them and for many of us, it is a transition from maidenhood to marriage and motherhood and like me, you may have arrived at Maven Hood. These transitions make life a roller coaster ride for sure. Today's guest is a woman who was familiar with adventure and life transitions. Her kindness and ability to reach out and connect with other women is a blessing. Before marrying Adriane was a missionary and when she returned state side worked as an educator. She is a wife to Keith and step mom to two delightful teenagers. Adrianne is also a partner with her husband in Strategic Edge Life and business coaching. She's an avid reader and loves homesteading. Their 30 acre Waggoner Woods farm, in her free time. Adrianne enjoys being creative in the kitchen. You may also find her reading on her front porch or taking the four wheeler out. Rides with her husband were enjoying coffee with girlfriends. It is my distinct pleasure and honor to have Adrian Wagner joined me today. Welcome Adrian, and thank you for joining me as your guest. It's my pleasure. I'm delighted to be here. Sandra. Well, that's great. Well, I'm going to just jump right in. I know we have lots to share. Um, you have some exciting stories to share with your adventures. So let me just jump in with this first question or statement rather, tell me about your travels both as a missionary and an adventure. Okay, well, I started off traveling at a fairly young age. I was about 13 years old and I traveled to Barcelona for a mission trip with my church. Um, it was during the 1992 Olympics and after two weeks in Spain we, uh, were able to share the gospel with some people that were in Barcelona for the Olympics. And then we have a friend of mine and I traveled by train through the Pyrenees mountains in Spain to a small coastal village in France called gay. And I ended up staying with some of my mother's friends. Um, this woman's name was patty and she and my mother knew each other from growing up in Los Angeles and um, they were friends from our church, your home church and Patty had married a Frenchman and she traveled back to France every summer. They were dancing. He was a choreographer and she was a dancer. She was a ballet dancer, so every summer they would go back to France. And um, when I was traveling to France for my first time, uh, we stayed with the family and their relatives. So actually patty wasn't there, but, uh, it ended up being the relatives of her husband. So, um, and stayed on the, on the beach and this small coastal town. It was just lovely. And, um, after a week of staying down in hurry, I took a train with my friend and we went up to Paris and that is where I met up with Patty and patty showed me around Paris. We visited the museum. She talked to me about the history of France. We walked the cobblestone streets and eight and the cafes of Paris. And quickly I fell in love and this started a long term appreciation for the French language and culture. So I returned back to my home in Los Angeles and I started my freshman year of high school that following year and I signed up for French one and that started, um, many years of studies, a French. I continued throughout high school and into college and ended up getting a degree in French. So she played to the seed that I eventually watered. And, you know, I've really enjoyed that part of, um, of learning and growing. Following high school graduation, I spent three months in Switzerland. Um, I was studying the Bible and I'm following my three months there. I ended up going to India on a, another mission trip, um, while I was in India. We served in some of Mother Teresa's orphanages and we shared the gospel with the Indian people. I was 18 when I went and, um, these two trips back to back, uh, they were. Both were life changing, opening. I'm going at such an impressionable age. And, um, I returned to Europe to do some sight seeing, um, after India I visited Florence and the Amalfi coast in Italy. Um, and I did that with some friends and I felt at home being Italy, I, I'm half Italian, my dad is all Italian and I felt right at home being in that culture, I loved the warmth than the art and of course the delicious foods. So that was a lot of fun. I returned to the states and I started college and after some indecision about what to study, I landed on elementary education because I loved working with kids and I had the French major. And during college I spent two summers on the coast of Normandy beaches studying the French language. And while I was there I took a couple weekends to do some exploring and um, visited London and Amsterdam. Um, wow. Yeah. And so I completed college in 2002 and I had a boyfriend from college. We had broken up, but he remembered from our time together that I liked. I was interested in Africa. So he put me in touch with a school in Senegal, Africa. And I ended up teaching a, it was an international school, but it had a Christian emphasis. It was like a mission school. And I spent a year there and I taught third graders. Um, they came from many different backgrounds. I heard a variety of different languages in my classroom. They're from all over the. And um, I just loved it. It was a lot of fun. So my favorite part of, of my travels was just broadening my view of the world and meeting people, seeing new things, hearing different languages. And um, of course the art and architecture were unique and beautiful. And um, I, I just appreciated that. And the food was great. It was great to have exposure to all those different flavors. Well, that, that makes me wonder in, and we'll want to ask this question. Have you, um, you said the food and of course just the beauty of all the different lands you saw, but I, I wonder, did you find like having a meal, was it different? Like did they, do the different cultures approach the mealtime differently than perhaps we did in the state? I'm sure you can relate to this because I know you and Robert went to France this recently within the past couple of years, but I loved the way the French people approach meal time. It was an experience. It was not just sit down and fill your stomach. It was a, it was something to enjoy. It took hours and they would savor it with good wine and good conversation and long into the evening. And um, it really set the stage for the way I like to eat at home, which is don't rush, take your time, enjoy the company and enjoy the food. I really, that's one of the reasons why I love to cook is because I want it to be an experience for the people that I'm feeding. So, um, it's just, it's fun for me. I really enjoyed that part of France. And um, another example was when I was in Africa, they had a tradition of eating what they call it, eating around the pool, and they would have a big plate or a bowl that would feed up to 10 people. And you would have people sit all the way around in a circle and everyone would use their hands and they would eat from this communal bowl. And um, I enjoyed that too, that I thought that was a really interesting way of sharing community and sharing life sharing food. And um, uh, so that was, that was a lot of fun too. Oh, I like that. And I like how you're, you've incorporated that in your home because I think it's a lost art to have the family dinner or time together and we're so rushed with different things. But I like how you've incorporated that just from your adventures and your travels. And boy, as a mom, I'm listening to you, you know, do your missionary travels even as a, as a teenager, young teenager. I know you were accompanied. I know you had chaperones, but still I'm like, oh my goodness, what a great adventure. And I'm sorry, what, what, uh, what country in Africa? Guyana, which is on the coast. It's on the western side. I'm kind of in central, a little bit further north, but um, but, um, on, on the western side. So. Okay, well, and, and I know you said that you just enjoyed all of them and I didn't fully realize all the different countries you had visited. Um, and, and really in a short time, it's, it's amazing and I loved hearing that story. Now, did you have a favorite country or a favorite, something during your travels? Was there one thing that just stood out more than others? There was, I had to talk to when I read that question because of all the places I've visited. My favorite place is um, I'm, I'm, I guess you just say I'm the Stalberg, but my family, my grandparents are from a coastal town in California. It's from the Monterey Peninsula and of all the places I've been to, I love that area. It's just, it's casual, but it's sophisticated and it's just beautiful. The coast is so pretty. It's rocky. It's a little bit chilly. There's a lot of fog. So I do love the Monterey Peninsula and probably due to the fact that I have a lot of special memories there with my grandparents, but I'm also just because of the beauty of the area, but when I traveled on my own, I'm abroad. I love the city of Positano. That was my favorite city and that's only a mouthy coast in Italy. Um, it's also a coastal town and it's built up into the rocks and I'm just overlooking this breathtaking view and um, so that, that was something that stood out to me. Yeah, that sounds wonderful. It sounds marvelous and I'm hearing with each of your stories just how you've connected, um, with, with people over, you know, over food, over art, over reaching out when you're doing the missionary work and I just love hearing that. Um, did you find though, when you did some of your travels, I know you're very fluent in French, but did you find in your travels, was language ever a barrier? How did you. My French, when I first went to France, I actually didn't speak any French because I had just been exposed to the language. And the culture when I was 13, so at that time I had to just rely on a, it was interesting when I was visiting with those people, we would

There are many movements that promote empowering we women, yet with each new wave, we seem to lose our way a bit more. A good majority are not more in the foundation or anchored with the core issues. So on today's podcast I will be speaking about the power of femininity, feminine Queens and Feminine Warriors. We are meant to be feminine and Warriors. We are meant to be warriors in a uniquely Feminine Way. Warrior, Queens, Warrior, princesses, crowned and gowned yes, but being gowned were ready to fight too, and I don't mean to fight in a combat battle style that we think of when we say fight. The women do serve in this role and attempt to prove that we can do it all yet capable doesn't always mean we should now stay with me. Don't get mad and turn off. Please hear me out. Just because we can do something doesn't mean we should or that it's the best, and this applies to many other women's movements in our contemporary culture, and these aren't necessarily grounded in the foundational issues, but have peripheral temp attempts to prove something. There is a war that rages single, married with kids or without. We each play a role in this cosmic battle called life. It is not about eradicating the men and their masculinity, although there are certainly seems a movement to do this very thing. Men are needed to operate in life in their unique ways. We need their contributions to life and this world, not according to the current feminist dictates, but according to creation mandates, the war that rages. It's subtle and unseen. I know far too many angry women who with just a few additional inflammatory issues, rage at the injustice of it all. Certainly there are injustices, but these are not alleviated with anger or trying to totally dismantle what it means to be masculine. Women. We're not always right and men are not always wrong. The men who have been deplorable need to take responsibility for their horrible actions. Women, not all that men do is deplorable because not all men are rotten. Guys, our role as women has over time been misunderstood and misrepresented with culture shifts. There has been waves of feminism to reclaim what our roles are currently. There is what is known as the third wave feminism and perhaps there's even a fourth movement and it seems with each new wave we've drifted the mark of the issues, our anger and our raging at the injustice of it all has taken away from the core issues, so like with the first edition history books, subsequent additions often drift from the first hand account. It's not as accurate and with each addition, that's after that, it becomes less accurate. This hold true for the feminism movement and more on that in a bit, but now what I see is a movement that could be called feminism as it is comprised of women and those supporting femininity. This rise and call to action aims to establish what femininity truly is from a firsthand account. It is an unseen seldom notice battle, but it is there and it has a cost. Whether we actively are participating or not, and with all this, it affects our soul. Are you feeling weary and worn out? Heartache and soul pain overtaking your life? An unsettled feeling of wanting to do something or knowing that there's more to this life because this unseen battle for femininity has a high price. It's been raging for decades, millennia because unnoticed, and even if we don't join in the core issues, still beckon to be addressed and we feel it at a very deep level. So ladies, where do you go when the ache of your heart begins to make itself known? That there's got to be more that these injustices with the femininity at movements attempt to address. Where do you go when that unsettled spirit announces the need for attention. Some of us do get involved in movements and they can be good. They can be a force of good, and then sometimes we fall into buying something in the attempt to feel better or perhaps indulging in food or we might get lost in a book or a TV series or daydreaming and fantasizing about a different life. Or perhaps you just allow your life to be consumed with business. Because if we stay busy, we don't have to deal with these hidden soul issues. We're too busy to address them. Some of you I've seen go into super woman mode and try to do everything and all by yourself and you do a decent job with it. The appearances show that because then if we do it all, if we are that super woman mode, then we won't feel undone yet our soul still speaks differently and the longing is still there, so on the surface we may appear all together because we are busy, seemingly efficient, professional, and perhaps tough as nails. We are trying to prove that we can do it all and that we do all that men do, but on the inside we are losing ourselves. This conquest of what it means to be a woman. So we find ways to sue sue our souls and our minds. We do this, as I said, with fantasy food or some other numbing addictions to try to remedy the ache, the desire in our heart and these activities. They're not benign. They entangled themselves in our lives and in our hearts choking out the life we wish to live as they become relentless addictions or default habits. Perhaps our default response to life and hurt and pain and the struggle of what it means to be a feminine warrior, so each of these activities become an issue when we turn to them for solace in an attempt to find a sort of source of fulfillment, to know what it means to be feminine or a feminist. So what exactly is this battle we are involved in? What role do we women need to play in this cosmic war? What is our part in being a warrior, in partnership with others, regardless of gender. The battle began thousands of years ago and it is a war that continues to rage Adam and eve partners in all that God created fully living in the design for each of their unique lives. They enjoyed fellowship with God, walking with him in the garden. Adam, first of creation had life breathed into him by God Almighty and Eve. God's crowning glory of his creation because he pronounced it. It all was very good when he arrived on the scene, but what eve did, she did her own thing and Adam, he abdicated. He just watched. He did not take up his role as masculine and eve tried to usurp her role as feminine and the consequences have affected and impacted humanity and all of life ever since you can read about this account in the first three chapters of the book of Genesis in the Bible, so now that all of human humankind destiny has changed, so has our role as women, and it began as a slow erosion of what femininity and masculinity we're designed to be the consequences they have been growing exponentially ever since. If you read the biography of Jesus, you learn he elevated women to their proper place in culture, a culture that often degraded women and treating them as second class citizens. Jesus did more for women's movement than any wave of feminism. It's worth worth reading the account about him. The historical account. Alls you need to do is pick up one of the gospels. It's in the new testament of the Bible and read Matthew's account or marks or johns. These are firsthand accounts of Jesus's life with Luke, a second town to count. He interviewed people and had a firsthand account, but he wrote it and it's second account, but that's an aside, so these firsthand accounts of Jesus's life alltel about his stories of how he elevated women. Jesus was a supporter of women and perhaps I could even say the original founder of the women's movement really just read his biography, but you must read it enlightened by the culture of that era to see what he did for women and you will be amazed at what he did. There is the account of the woman at the well. She was from the race of the Samaritans who were in constant contention with the Israelites. Least two races. They would avoid one another at all costs, even walking miles out of their way to avoid one village. Yet Jesus went straight through a Samaritan village. Met this woman. She just happened to be at the well midday to avoid the other women. Why? Because she had a tarnished reputation. She's had five different men in her life. Yet Jesus began to speak to her, which is taboo anyway, and more so because she is a Samaritan, so not only Jesus shouldn't have been speaking to a woman, he should have especially not have been speaking to this woman, but he spoke truth to her and she was amazed and her life changed, and then there was a woman with a bleeding issue. It's been said that she may have been hemorrhaging going through the change of life we don't know, but he deals with this. She's had this issue for 12 years. The doctors haven't been able to do anything for her and she's out of money. No one could help her, and she spent all her money. She had on a cure. She heard of Jesus and learned that he was walking through the town, saw the crowds following him. She only touched Jesus, him of his cloak and was immediately healed, and then Jesus took the time to acknowledge her and her faith. This during an era where whirlwind were never to be noticed or acknowledged or seen yet, Jesus lifted her up by his word and his kindness and she was healed. And then there was this woman condemned for adultery and ladies, you and I know it takes two to commit adultery. Yet this account of what Jesus did for this woman only has the woman publicly accused. I've heard it said that she was drugged out probably in the act of adultery. Where was her partner? My point in sharing this is to listen carefully what Jesus did for this woman. So the crowd had already picked up stones to throw at her, stoning her to death for adultery. And Jesus calmly told the crowd that the one who has no sin and he meant did no wrong, did everything right should be the first one to cast the stone. One by one, the stones were dropped, and the woman remained in Jesus's presence, Jesus, the only one could have cast the stone standing b

Have you ever considered how you might regain your good health or maintain the health you have? How about the excitement and challenge of downsizing and this after living on a farm? Well, on today's podcast, it is my distinct pleasure to have my friend, an amazing gracious lady as my guest, Pam Hedge. Pam is married to her best friend and they just recently downsized to tiny living. She and her husband reside in a 29 foot fifth wheel outside of Aiken, South Carolina. Pam Retired after 30 years in the publishing industry. The last 11 years spent as the owner, publisher, designer, and editor of her own magazine called all things country. Both her health and her husband had been transformed through plexus and now she shares what she has learned, helping others regain health and vitality. Pam is a passionate kind, caring person by nature and knowledgeable health and wellness coach and network marketer for plexis worldwide. This is a terrific combination for those who are under her care. When Pam isn't helping people change their health and their lives, she enjoys spending her own yarn and knitting. She particularly likes knitting socks. Pam is a proud mom to one daughter who lives in Idaho and delighted to be a grandma to a granddaughter. Pam and her husband Dave share their home with three dogs who rule their lives. Abby, the senior lab and two very spoiled Yorkies Dixie and champ. Pam, thank you so much for joining me on today's podcast. Well, thank you Sandra. I am just thrilled. It's great to have you here. And I'm going to just jump in because I know our listeners want to hear about your, your health journey and what that all entailed. So if you would tell me about your journey to regain your health and that of your husband's. Well, it, it actually started quite by accident. If you would have asked me in February of 2014, I would have told you I was pretty healthy. And so is my husband other than, you know, we were at 50 and you know what happens when you turn 50. So, um, anyway, he had a stroke. He had a stroke and just opened my eyes. He spent a week in UK hospital in Lexington, Kentucky. And they figured out that there wasn't really much they can do about it because of where it was located in the top of his head. So they sent them home with a bag full of medications and they literally turned him into a Zombie. But man I did, I knew for 20 years, wasn't there anymore. He was sleeping all the time. He never did that. He, he, he just was different. So I had actually just a couple more months before that started drinking this pink drink and a friend of mine had been sharing with me and I put her off and put her off and put her off. Finally relented. Well, after Dave had his stroke, I thought I need to do some more research. They have leather products, um, I need to research what all they have. So I got him going on their vitamins and they had a bad that we have an excellent probiotic and, and an Omega product that has five Omegas versus just have three. And I helps his heart and his brain. So I got all all of that into him and he started feeling better. So. And I'm a researcher by nature, my nature, so I have just tried to learn everything I can about the ingredients are all plant based ingredients. Um, it, it's really the best solution I found for our healthcare. Well, that's pretty, uh, pretty amazing. Um, just to what you went through and, and how you've noticed even the benefit for your husband and what he went through with the stroke. Yeah. So dovetailing off that with the benefits, what have you noticed? What have you experienced in improving your, your own personal health? Personally, I, I sleep better. That's what I noticed right off the bat. And when I wake up in the morning, I'm ready to get up and I could before I could lay there for half hour an hour to myself, I didn't even want to get up, you know, that felt good. Now when I wake up, it's my eyes are open and I'm ready for the day because you're feeling rested. I slept all night. I just feel clear. What do I need to get and do and everything we put in our bodies is different. Right. And I'm not saying we were not on a diet, so to speak. Some people are, some people aren't what, what Dave and I noticed is, you know, I used to make him dinner and he ate two hamburgers along with everything else. Pretty soon he was fall after one hamburger. You, you're, you get full. You don't even realize it really. But, and then it got to the point where if I put too many chemicals in my body, I couldn't tell. You can tell by the taste of the food. Even so. Well, we put in our bodies is different and our mindset is much clearer now. Uh, another great benefit, especially if you have a husband that is one of those people when he's sick, Dave's not been sick for four years. He had that stroke, but he's not had a cold, is not had tonsillitis. His glands used to swell up on him two or three times a year. He's not been sick. And he was a terrible patient. Terrible driving me crazy. Know that that's been a blessing. You know, I was gonna say that's a benefit right there you can imagine. And the other thing I really noticed is from so many years of being a graphic artist, my bones in my shoulders, I went to the doctor, had a Max raid, they told me I had degenerative bone disease. Oh. And I literally could not raise my arms above my shoulders without pain. And it got to the point where every month before my paper got published, I would have to go to the chiropractor and have him work on me and then go to my massage therapist and have her work on me. Yes. To get through that. That week I put the magazine together that that all went away. And, and I can't say that degenerative bone disease went away. What it was, is I had so much inflammation in me that now everything just kind of works. Right? A lot of it I, you know, I used to look at people and because I've always been big my whole life thinking, oh, I'm just fat. I was never that fat was just inflamed areas of abuse and antibiotics and processed foods. Mcdonald's, it all adds up. It all adds up. In the end, you, you're hearing all, all the time now more and more about gut health. It really is a thing. Listen to your gut. We've heard that our whole lives, right? We should have been. Yeah, we should have been paying attention. I know. I should've been. [08:23] Oh, that's, that's actually very inspiring and exciting even to hear about that. Just the whole inflammation thing and that wasn't so much that you were overweight as you were really inflamed and your body was showing it, um, that it was wanting help and you gave it help it sounds like. And it took me awhile. It, I've lost it right at 80 pounds over the period of four years and I didn't lose anything for two years. Scales never really changed. My clothing got and my face got skinnier. It was all just that inflammation coming out. What does my body really and eliminate? Or the candy, the yeast that's in your system to. Yeah. Yeah. And that's a whole nother subject, right? Yeah. And you said for the first two years you really didn't notice a scale difference. Like you wouldn't have a scale victory, but you were noticing other non scale victories, like your clothing size change or face slimming down and no more inflammation and you're sleeping better. Feeling pretty awesome. Yeah. And other things to Dave's words disappeared. That's incredible. Uh, my feet. I've always had very scaly feet on the bottom of my feet. Of course I don't like shoes much anyway. I've always abused my feet. My beautician's will tell you that. Um, but yeah, once I got my gut healthy than all that white scaly stuff came off my feet. That's amazing. Those are what we call non scale victories. [10:17] Well, so as you're talking about these victories, I know they're, I'm, I'm assuring that you had made either hitting some roadblocks or some obstacles while you were on this transition to better health. Would you share with our listeners what you may have come up against? Well, you know, a lot of it is everyone thinks I lost all my weight by dieting and that couldn't be farther from the truth. It took me 52 years and diets I gassed clear back into high school. Uh, my mom sent me to hypnosis, I like to hypnosis with Dr Stipe for two years. That's right. And that's probably why to this day. I don't like to eat, I don't like the act of eating. I have to force myself to eat because of that. But I've been on diets before. Right. And, and I had an aunt that lost all kinds of weight on the Atkins Diet years ago, but after that she got colon cancer. Oh. And then the more research you see, uh, that was a big thing that happened to people that followed the Atkins Diet. So you're like, oh, I learned that, you know, the first three letters of diet is die. Yeah. I just, we want, we want, we just have decided that we eat healthier rotatable eatable ice cream every night. We do, but we don't. Yeah, I'd rather have a bowl of fruit. Well, and I, I like what you also said, Pam, was that though you lost weight, you see it on the scale. Now the scale registers that, but it's really not so much dieting because it was, your body was so inflamed and I wonder how many of us on, you know, at least in America, how many of us, um, we, me being one of them, we need to lose weight, I need to go on a diet, need to do these things and we want to eat healthy and we're making healthier choices, but we still haven't lost the weight. And I, I wonder how much of it is the inflammation as you shared because that sure sounds like compelling truth that our bodies are inflamed with what nutrition we're giving them or not giving them. Exactly. And I believe inflammation is a major thing even with Lupus and fibromyalgia and, and of course once a person's diagnosed with them, then they're on a medication regimen forever, which exasperates the problem. Uh, I, I'm not saying plexus, heels, anything, I'm just in its worse lookin

My friend and I were discussing shame. She was wondering if you really ever got over it. The shame we have, she was wondering if one just had to endure it to some degree. We each have shame that is hidden away. Our resiliency, our ability to bounce back from shames message is determined by our support group, our community, and the risk we take in sharing on today's podcast, I will address the issue of shame, shame, resist, revisited because it revisits us and I want to address the power to read its hold over our lives. Stacy Eldrid. She's quoted as saying, if we all listened long enough to the voices about who we should be, we grow death to the beauty of who we are. Shame does that to us. It keeps us hidden away. Deaf to the truth of our beauty. Shame keeps us too afraid to be discovered for who we really are because we believe shames message, that we are unlovable, that we are worthless, and that if discovered, we wouldn't be liked, perhaps even despised for our life or for what we did or for what happened to us. This is shames, awful work, damaging our lives, purpose, and destroying our souls. Hope I have suffered, was shamed for decades. It started early in my life due to my childhood perceptions and the story I told myself the feeling of not being good enough, the message that I was too sensitive. You get it. We are told we are either too much or not enough. It may be a fleeting statement by someone that loves us, but somehow it sticks and repetition. We use as evidence making this story, this perception, our truth, part of the fabric of our life. This makes this damning lie all the more damaging my mid teens. I was raped by a boyfriend. I was shamed because I had been drinking and left myself vulnerable. I took it upon myself to shame myself. My boyfriend heaped even more on me. How did I let this happen? Seeking help. Later on, I was blamed by the counselor to whom I had hoped to get some closure and healing. She only confirmed that I was the one who was responsible for what happened to me, and there are other traumatic experiences that left my soul. Oh, so wounded the shame mounting. There were minor occurrences that confirmed shames lies in my life during my undergraduate work. Just feeling a bit out of step with my classmates. I assumed that I was not getting it. They all seem so together too, to admit the need for help when everyone else seemed to get it. I just muddled through, but being on the Dean's list and later the president's list, this did nothing to stop that shame message. Crazy, Huh? Then my graduate work, the lie that I was too stupid that it must have been a mistake for me to get into graduate school and this was a message that a professor heaped on me. He even went as far to ask if I had been a mistake for me to be in graduate school. The shame list goes on. The shame mounts and gains strength. Can you relate to any of this? Do you have any hidden shame that keeps your soul sequestered away? We each have our shame story, and as I said earlier, the resiliency, the ability to bounce back is depends a whole lot on our community and around those who love us and how much we're willing to share and risk, and although it is our story, once shame is revealed, it becomes easier to shine the light of truth and have all the shame storm revealed. And as we allow the work of truth in our life, shame continues to diminish and is eventually loses power. Shames tentacles are often far reaching and deep wrapping around our soul. So it does take a lot of work to loose the stranglehold that shame has on our lives, but it is so worth it. I'm here to tell you it is so worth it. These things I shared with you today are things I couldn't have shared earlier, but no longer will I let shame rule my life. So this may very well be a life work, but it's worth doing to answer my friend. We do not have to learn to live with shame, but we do have to learn to identify it, reveal it, expose it for its lies that it is so we can move on. I know that shame does not relinquish, relinquish its residents in our souls easily. It rears its ugly head time and again spewing it's lies, but it's only because we have disturbed it's dark residence. In the recesses of our heart. The battle is ugly for awhile, but in the end, truth and love when and shame is squashed, so keep pressing on it. It is worth it. Sharing Shame. You find a trusted friend or a reliable trusted counselor who understands, shames, impact, then share with them your heart and your hurt. Share with them what you're. You've been thinking. Let them kindly and lovingly tell you how has been a lie. Trust them as they proclaimed truth over your life, receive their love, received their truth, received their message. Shame has a stranglehold on your soul for too long. It has kept you isolated and separated. Today you can begin the process to extinguish the work of shame on your life. Now, here's the truth that will help you on this journey of dumping shame from your life. This truth has two parts. The first part is this part of life is changeable. This changeable part is in the dealing with people. People will always have opinions about us. Their opinions are not. Our business is spoken of behind her back. It's not for us to know, leave it alone. People's opinions change nearly as quick as the wind shifts. We want people to like us, but it is not the basis of our identity and shame will keep us seeking other people's approval and recognition while keeping us separated from really connecting. It's an awful cycle. Shame uses our desire, our need to be connected. We seek approval and love from people and when we sense rejection, we retreat and in retreating. Shame reminds us that our secret self cannot be discovered because then people would really not like us, so we tell ourselves that if we just try harder, maybe we will be accepted. Even loved. We then create or add to the veneer of are pretending not to care what people think or we start shrinking into the quiet recesses of our home as we become disengaged from the life we once knew and this happens almost unknowingly, unaware of this slow creep of shames rule in our life. We are created for connection and relationship, but shame when it takes root strangle holds us. We are prevented from using our unique gifts and talents because we are too fearful to risk being ourselves because to be ourself means that people would discover and that is just too big of a risk, and then we go about our life living like a fraud with skin on. We know something's just not right. We meet. Maybe we may be very social on the outside and no one knows the inner struggle. We may become very reclusive. Shames effects are varied as there are people, but ultimately shame prevents us from connecting. It prevents us from fully enjoying relationships with friends, family, and our spouses. Shame prevents from boldly using our abilities with confidence. Shame keeps us tethered. No, myered is a better word in the muck of lies, limiting fullness of life, so this first part of truth, people's opinions are always changing. t's something to remember. The second part of this truth is there is something that is unchangeable. This part of life has absolutely and forever unchangeable and it has to do with God. He is unchangeable and his truth is unchangeable. He is the only one who can define you and me, and that's pretty awesome that his identity, his proclamation over us, his truth, what he speaks over as never changes, unlike people's changing opinions. Think about it this way. I love pottery. I marvel and admire those who are gifted at throwing clay on a wheel and fashioning a beautiful piece. The whole process of glazing and firing and waiting, perhaps embellishing whatever the pottery creator wants. Her opinion of her piece defines the piece. Since she is the creator. This can apply to any in any creative endeavor or anything that we put our hands to do because even home decorating home, making the work we do, we define it by being the creative power behind it, which leads me to the part two of this truth that I mentioned, your maker, our God, is the only one who can define you. God is the designer of his creation for which we are apart. As a matter of fact, we are his defining glory and excellence of his creation because when he breathed life into man, he declared this creative work and the rest of creation as good each part of the creative process of making all things seen and even unseen. God said it was good then wait for this nugget of truth, this unchanging truth. God then made woman, and you know the story she was created from God by taking a rib from Adam side and when God was done with this act of his creative work, do you know what he said? He stated it is very good. The emphasis on being very good. He is the only one that kind of define us. His words and his way are unchanging and we women are his very good part of creation. Remember this, when shame tries to clean to you again, speak truth to your soul, received the proclamations, those who love you and know you. You may not believe them yet, but received them and speak them to your soul, and here's a challenge. Look at yourself in the mirror, but don't just stop there. Look yourself in the eye and speak truth to yourself. Speak Truth to your soul. God says that through Jesus Christ in God, we are blameless. He calls US beloved. We are pure and holy. We stand in Christ victorious. We are forgiven. We are redeemed, which means bought, purchased from the chains of sin and death, purchased from living in shame, and there's more. God's Word is full of the truth of our identity. Shame wants you and I not to discover this truth. Shame wants us to keep seeking that changing opinions of people. Shame wants you to pedal in this futility as quickly as fashion changes from season to season or even month to month zero people's opinions, they changed about us, but remember this, God's opinion and

What is your favorite way to get some exercise? Are you a member of a gym or a fitness boutique or perhaps enjoy exercise training at home on your TV. Perhaps you are a runner or a power walker. Fitness is not only good for our bodies and health, but our minds as well. On today's podcast, I had the pleasure of my favorite fitness instructor joining me on the show. Laura, Donna telly is an amazing woman who's teaching skills and own fitness journey inspires. Let me tell you a bit more about Laura. My guest, Laura, creative by nature, received her bachelor of fine arts in 2005, concentrating on oil painting from Rutgers University, Mason Gross School of the arts. She then continued on to receive her associate degree in graphic design from Katharine Gibbs School in 2007. After a few years as a freelancer and both graphic design and fine art, Laura began working in customer service in banking for a steadier source of income after her first child, she began her career as a fitness professional by teaching Barr and Mat pilates in the evenings while maintaining her day job. After the birth of her second child, she was afforded the opportunity to stay at home and pursue her interest in fitness. Laura became an ace certified group fitness instructor and continued her polities training through balanced body. She added reformer and apparatus training to her repertoire. Laura is also an fai functional aging specialist and has completed her role the form of foam rolling certification. Laura's passion is bodies. She loves challenging the body in new innovative ways while incorporating a mind body connection. She strives to integrate mind, body, and breath in an effort to strengthen the muscles as well as the spirit. She feels that plays is one of the best forms of exercise to create a lean, long, strong, and balanced body without unneeded force or injury. When Laura is not instructing or doing pilates, you can find her spending time with her family, which include her husband and two young children. Laura's other interest include hiking, drawing, sewing, and baking. Laura, thank you so much for joining me today on the art of connection. Thank you for having me. Well, let's just jump right in. I would like you, if you would please tell me about your fitness journey, how you got started and how it got you are where you are today. eah, I think that, um, my first introduction to fitness was when I was quite young, probably, I don't know, 12 or 13 or so, um, and my sister who is older than me and myself, we used to do aerobics videos in our living room. Um, we would do buns of steel was one of our favorite, which is a well known one. Um, and also, you know, other aerobics videos, Leslie Chasen was another one, um, um, and we would do yoga and so on and so forth. So after, um, all of that, I just continued on doing fitness throughout high school. Um, my sister and I were both involved in horseback riding a lot. I spend a lot of my time as a, a young person working at Barnes in order to afford horseback riding lessons. So I was active in that, in that way. Um, and also did karate as a younger, as a younger person as well. So, um, I had a nice introduction to fitness, a lot of it was based on just what was fun and what was enjoyable without too much pressure as to the results of whatever I was doing, which was nice. Um, as I got older I became more serious as far as trying to make my body look a certain way. There was all the pressures of high school and what everybody should look at look like. And um, so I put a lot of self pressure on myself to, to look the way I expected myself to. So that was a little foray into the negative aspects of, um, body image, um, which, you know, as I've gotten older I've worked through quite a lot to get back to the point where fitness is more fun and enjoyable for myself. That's, that's terrific. And I like how you talked about the body image thing, which is so huge and that you're aware of that and have overcome that. Um, so my next question is why is fitness so important? Oh, it's so important in so many ways. Um, for myself, after I had my son, my first, my first child, I used fitness as an outlet of a way to get into the house and let some energy out and move around and be completely myself without being a mom, a wife, a worker, a, um, any and all of the above. So fitness was definitely just kind of like a release for me and I think that it could be that way for a lot of people that it just feels great. Whatever you're doing, whether it's going out for a run or going dancing or hiking or walking or whatever you might be doing, um, that it's, uh, a release from your everyday life. Um, but then on top of that, it's so good for your body to exercise. Strength Training, especially for women can really alleviate the, um, lesson, the ability to get osteoporosis and Osteopenia as you get older. Um, anything impactful on your joints is, is good to build bone density, um, and prevention of disease. If you want a lower health bill, as you get older, you might as well start exercising now to keep your heart healthy. Your lungs happy, your joints in order and so forth. Um, and then on another completely different note, it depending on what type of exercise you like to do, it can be a way to be social. So if you enjoy going to a gym, you might meet friends there or if you are part of a studio, you might meet New People. I'm just feel a sense of belonging, um, that you might not get in other areas of your life. So all over. It's just a great thing to, to, um, to do. Yeah. You made some really great points. Of course we know the physical aspect of it, but as you said, just mentally, emotionally and socially, it's so beneficial to. That's awesome. Well, what are some common myths about fitness or working out that maybe you've run into yourself or with some of the clients you work with? Yeah, uh, there's so many. Um, I think one that I've run into is when I started working out, I thought, oh, I'm going to do cardio. I'm going to go running. I'm going to get my heart rate up super high all the time for extended periods of time, and that's the best way to maintain fitness and lose weight and be healthy. Um, and there's no saying that it is not a great form of fitness. I, I do it. I enjoy it. It's a great way to get your endorphins flowing. But it's a myth that it's the only good form of exercise. Um, you know, as I've progressed through my fitness journey, I've come to realize the strength training is so great for your body, for your mind to feel so strong too. And to, um, to feel like you can accomplish these, these strength goals is very important as well. Um, it also is a weight way to great way to boost your metabolism and maintain muscle strength as well as bone strength, bone density, and gives you an all over type of like a balanced body, not just being strong from a cardio aspect but all, all the way around. So that's one big one. Um, the other one that goes to hand in hand with that is that strength training as a woman will make you get big and bulky. And I'm, look manish, which is just basically impossible. Those women you see in magazines or around that do look bulky or more like have a manual or more manly physique, have been strength training for hours at a time, perhaps taking supplements. And their goal is to look like that. So they've really pushed their body to the extreme. Um, but it's a myth that just doing strength training three or four times a week is going to get you that bulky for seek. Okay. Um, let's see. Another big one is that not everybody can exercise. Everybody can exercise. I see a lot in my studio, the studio that I work at, um, of people ranging from somebody who's in incredible shape already to somebody who can't walk, who is a paraplegic, um, being able to complete beautiful exercises. And I think that a lot of times people will stop themselves before they get out of the gate because they are, they feel weak or they're too heavy. They're out of shape, they're uncoordinated, um, you know, name a thousand different excuses because they don't feel that they can get to the point where they can begin exercising, but it's just not true. Anybody can do it. Well, those are, those are some big things. I think about that one. That's so much of a, again, a mindset of what we are and the things we tell ourselves that we can't do these things. And, and listers, I've had the pleasure of taking classes from Laura and know what an encourager she is. No matter what level you start at, you got to start somewhere and she works with everybody on their different levels. I love that. So that's a great myth to bust. And the other one that you brought up, Laura, was the strength training because I've heard that too. Well, I don't want to get bulky, but strength training, as you said, it's benefits, uh, for, for physical health as well as the mental part of it too is important. Now, would you consider polities, which I know is your, your favorite area? If I used that word that would palladio's be considered a strength training as well or not necessarily? It is, Yes. Most definitely. It's a different type of strength training. Like, um, I might have a bodybuilder come into the studio and they are so strong, but they're not physically able to do moves that you would see in a Palati studio because the polities it's like strength from the inside out. It starts deep in your core and then it radiates to all of the other areas of your body and its muscles that you might not look work in your traditional strength training atmosphere, um, these tiny intrinsic muscles that really support your system, um, that support your skeletal system and keep you, you know, tall and straight and strong from the inside out. Um, so yes, definitely a strength training system, but it's also, you know, mind body connection, flexibility. Um, it can be cardio depending what type of pyladies you're doing. If you're doing, u

Busyness not busyness, but busy ness seems epidemic, perhaps pandemic now days, and with it, the mantra of how good multitasking is, while multitasking is often necessary in some circumstances, motherhood as an example, research and common sense states that multitasking is detrimental to being mindful, busyness, faithfulness, and consistency. These are the topics for today's podcast, so much of our lives and our days are filled with busyness. Much of the busyness is job related or commitment related and cannot be avoided, and then we add to that wanting to connect and have relationships or pursue our hobbies and the things we enjoy so we multitask. Attempting to squeeze out of each minute, all that we possibly can for efficiency sake and hope that we will free up more time. We mop the kitchen floor while preparing a meal and get the tea brewing for the next batch of Kombucha. We take that busyness call while working on the project on our computer. We call a friend to catch up and while so doing dust furniture while we talk gardening, we listen to a podcast and clean out the garden shed inbetween tossing weeds into the bin. You get the idea, when I was waitressing, I'm mastered multitasking, sort of a requirement to a fit, efficiently serve the patrons. It just made sense to me the way I organize my time and I was quite proud of my skillset. This skill transferred over to other areas of my life and now looking back though I was perhaps efficient. I wonder if I missed much of life in exchange for efficiency missing the moment because I was focusing on what was next, missing the moments forever gone in the shuffle of all we have to do. I believe we miss out on living and enjoying life if we don't practice being engaged in the moment. If we don't practice mindfulness, the moments slip by, and here's a disturbing statistic. A couple of decades ago, the average attention span of an adult was 20 minutes. Now it is. Are you ready for this? Nine seconds, thanks to social media and phones that have us instantly connected for whatever sound byte of information we want coupled with the drive to get tons done to multitask. We have reduced our ability to pay attention from nearly a half hour to less than 10 seconds, nine seconds. It takes me longer to p nine seconds. That's a reduction in and being in the moment and mindful and it's no longer measured in minutes, but just a few seconds. A nine second attention span is grounds for a diagnosis of add or Adhd. Now I'm not making light of this diagnosis, but do you see where the epidemic may not be the letters as much as our lifestyle practices that there might be not be the need for an astronomical proportion of medicated peoples, but a change in how many of us do life busyness a part of life and culture, but can we do busyness different? Do we have to fill every waking hour with things to do and tasks to accomplish? Can we dump some things only due to the most important things? Can we do busy differently? I think so. It starts with our mindset, uh, choosing to be in the moment more than getting tons done, uh, choosing to not get it all done or doing it all because ultimately these little tasks like cleaning out the drawer right now is not as important as looking at your child in his eyes while he tells you his story about his day to not do so. To let this moment pass and moments like these pass your child will soon learn soon. Learn that getting stuff done is more important than connecting and meeting soul needs and the practice of continuing to work on a project, on the blue screen while speaking with a client. Well, people can usually tell when we're not really listening, when we are not truly engaged in the conversation. And often we miss important details because we are not intentional with the conversation. How can we be when our brain is also attempting to do something else for efficiency sake. And how about we no longer choose to hurriedly clean up the kitchen immediately after a meal when we've had guests over. Because how often have we missed the spontaneity of conversation and connection, segregated, isolated in the kitchen. The cleanup will happen later and that's okay. Or sometimes people join in the cleanup. The importance is to stay engaged with the people around you rather than worrying about the busyness of a task busyness. It segues into the habitual days of routine amidst our busyness where we may ask ourselves, does any of this really matter or make a difference? You know, caring for the little things, the everyday commitments. Is it worth it? I struggled with wanting to make a difference somewhere. I think of that kid on the trike from the movie the incredibles, remember him. It's the scene where Mr incredible sees the kid on the trike and asked what he's waiting for and the kid replies something amazing I guess, and that is what I wait for the opportunity to do something amazing. I'm still waiting, trying to slow my pace of life and level of busyness, learning to be mindful and engaged in the moments of life that really matter. You know, being consistent and faithful in the little things because it is in the little things that prepare us for the bigger things and sometimes the big things happen and we aren't even aware of them happening, how they have impacted lives. School teachers, medical professionals, military personnel, law enforcement people, volunteers, moms, we are often unaware of how are reaching out in small ways makes a big impact on a person. Consistency and faithfulness in the little things we know busyness. It's a fact of life. The level of busyness we can adjust accordingly, but busyness remains and we must be both faithful in what we do and consistent in our practices and as I often like to do, especially with words that I've grown too familiar with. I like to check the original definition. Sometimes they even check the contemporary definition, so what does faithful and consistency mean? Faithful is defined as remaining loyal and steadfast and loyal. It means giving or showing firm and constant support or allegiance to a person or institution. Steadfast means was resolutely from and unwavering. Faithfulness segways nicely to consistency, which is defined as the quality of achieving a level of performance which does not vary in quality over time. It is unchanging in nature, standard or effect over time. Nice, Huh? For the little things in life that we must do the busyness we cannot avoid, we should be faithful and consistent from an unwavering and what we do with the level and quality of performance that does not change over time, meaning we do it to the best of our ability even as it has become routine. That is why it is important to prioritize with what we busy our times with. This is the only way we can be faithful and consistent in doing them and since it is humanly impossible to do it all, we must make some choices. Just how many clubs or sports or activities will we let each child participate in? How many volunteer groups will we be a part of? How much time will I devote to work? Perhaps wanting to advance my career? Will we hire a cleaning lady or we would clean our own home? There's always a choice and an option as to how we will fill our time, how busy we want to be, and this thought leads me to at the core of our being is the desire to have a purpose for what we do, the drive to live with a vision and a purpose. We want to make a difference in our part of the world where the use of our time, there is a desire common to humankind to make a difference. It is in the fabric of humanity to live for something bigger than ourselves and yet there are times and seasons of life where the everyday, the routine, the humdrum and monotony of days seem relentless and we judge them as holding little or no purpose, but faithfulness is learned over time and with practice. Consistency develops with faithfulness and here's what I am slowly learning. I am learning that his faithfulness in a little things that prepares me for the bigger things, the consistent practice of remaining steadfast in the little things I do doing them to the best of my ability always will bear fruit and other things and sometimes bigger things. Ladies, we are each created unique and wonderful with a magnificent purpose that we individually can only fulfill in a little area of our life, the sphere of our influence. Very often we do not see the purpose, but if we live with vision and intent, we can be assured that even in the routine, there is purpose to our lives. There are stories of teachers who remained unnamed, unknown that have touched the lives of those who have gone on to become astronauts or medical doctors on the cusp of discovery or missionaries who reached the last. The list goes on is that teacher any less in her contribution, her purpose, because we don't know her name, the fame and notoriety may not accompany her contribution, but in the eternal scheme of things she has noticed and cherished and honored. We measure too much of what we do against what others are doing. We most often harshly assess ourselves, falling short of some unnamed standard and feeling then like we have little to contribute. We abandoned using our gifts. The stodgy regime of my days often overwhelmed me. The monotony of maintaining a home can feel like stringing beads without a knot on the end. It is too easy to look at others' lives and see that they are making a difference, but me mopping the floor seems like such a waste of time, yet faithfulness in the little things pays dividends in my soul because doing all these things as unto the Lord rather than men puts it all in perspective and during these seasons where there seems more quiet than accomplishment, I have to remind myself of this truth, frequently faithful in each little thing, consistent in my practices and trust for the bigger things and those bigger things I may not even be aware of the big impact we may not even kno

To be loved and accepted runs deep. It's hardwired in us from the birth stories of orphanage, infants who do not thrive as they are denied physical touch and gentle, nurturing our heart ringing reality of this need our souls need nurturing and love. On today's podcast, I will be talking about love and truth and how they're related and necessary for our soul. The need to be loved and accepted follows us into adulthood and if this need isn't met or hasn't been met, we find that we began to make small compromises in order to get these needs met. The deep soul need to be loved and the need to be accepted as days and months. Melton two years. If our soul needs are not met, we find that we become someone we hardly recognize and perhaps don't like very much because the drive to be loved and accepted is so strong. This strong soul drive and we attempt to get this need met any way we can. Some of it, it ain't pretty. We do things we never thought we would do, and I'm not saying that this has to be heinous. Things of crime shows, but things that are in our nature we would never imagine doing. We do these things to get the need for love met or we do things to numb the feeling and the pain of abandonment and lack of love, so striving even harder to gain, love to be accepted. We think things we never thought we would think about because we tell ourselves a story about the why. Why don't we receive the love we desire? What is wrong with me? Can you hear the shame and this message here we ask ourselves, why are we not accepted? Why are we not loved? Why do I not belong anywhere? Where do I belong? And the feeling of abandonment overwhelms our heart. Fear overrides love. We have nothing to give, so creating the story to answer these questions of why we may be we may be calm, someone we never thought we would be perhaps becoming so negative that we find people avoiding us and that we don't keep friends or relationships very long This furthers the message of abandonment as it seems to follow us wherever we go. Building on the story we were, we created. Shame is quick to step in with this message. C, you are unlovable. No one can stand to be around you. You're annoying. That is why you are never included. It is because you're so weird that no one likes you or some such message. The cycle continues. The story builds. The message becomes more frequent and with such intensity that are dry for love and acceptance becomes frenetic. The story we tell ourselves becomes part of the fabric of our life, but it is an imposter, a liar. It is not our truth. It is a thread of a lie that has become woven into our life by rehearsing that lie and it's not something we've done on purpose. It's nearly a subconscious level. We may be come to realize that we have become someone we never expected to be and with shame in the mix. It keeps our tender soul in hiding, rehearsing the story that no one would understand, that we're too weird that no one's been through this. Our attempts at getting needs for love met in ways that we were never meant for us. They fall flat each time we fill our mouths in our stomachs with food that has nothing to do with fuel. We fill our minds with things that numb the pain and sorrow we feel we feel our airwaves with volume so loud in an attempt to block out the quiet ego of our souls crying for help, longing for love, and it all seems pretty hopeless. We pursue every avenue possible to receive love and acceptance, but the one and only way that truly fulfills so we pursue these, but ignore the truth that fulfills the wonderful fact is the unchanging truth is we are just one step away from change because there is hope and now for some of these truths, we cannot change the past, but we can start a new story. There is hope we cannot redo history or undo history, but we can turn and start a new way to live in truth and love. We cannot go back to yesterday or yesterday years. Nothing in the past can be changed, but the truth is we can make a change that will allow us to receive love, no acceptance, and not feel abandoned or not good enough any longer. We're just one step away from change to begin to live. Loved. It sounds simple and it is, but it's not easy to implement. There is no quick fix, but there is a lasting change. Truth. The definition of truth is a verified or indisputable fact or principle. It's agreement with a standard or original. Our culture doesn't often want truth, not real truth, but when I'm about to tell you requires an openness to hear truth and my hope is that you will embrace it. Why? Because I care about you. I don't want you stuck in the lies in the story that you've been told and continue to tell yourself. I want you to pull that thread of a lie from the fabric of your life and the change of which I speak of has four components. Now stay with me here. I'm telling you this because I care for you. That's why I'm doing this podcast. So the change of which I speak, the four components, surrender, forgiveness, truth, which then yields abounding, enduring love. The first word surrender. It sounds scary, doesn't it? The concept of surrender, but please stay with me. Surrender. It leads to thoughts of giving up without hope, without power, surrender to brainwashing, checking your brain at the door type of thinking, but the surrender of which I speak is life giving and life changing. A trade of are messed up. Life to a new life and a new beginning, a surrender of the old way of doing things for the new, as designed by as designed way of doing things. This surrender is the getting rid of the old and receiving the new sounds great, doesn't it? How often do we go bag up and surrender our old clothes? We no longer we no longer like and then take the money and buy new. That's the surrender of which I refer to, but it's much better. Another element of this surrender, and you can call it faith, is a bit like getting into our car every day. Every time we get into our car, we surrender unconsciously to the car maker skill, trusting that the car will perform as expected, surrendering to the functionality of the vehicle, and it's designed to get us to our destination safely. We do this type of surrender everyday without thinking, and we do it in different ways beyond just driving or getting new clothes, so the surrender of which I speak unburdens and unchains our souls. It allows us to walk in the freedom of what we were meant to be. It allows us to use our unique gifts to their fullest potential and these gifts you may not even have thought of for years having tucked away this surrender allows us to embrace our true identity. This surrender is to God and his way to surrender to the one who created us in his image to reflect his character in our gifts and talents, and with surrender comes forgiveness. We must all live in forgiveness, not forgetfulness, but active forgiveness, making that choice. We may say we have no wrongdoing to which we need forgiveness, but let me ask you these questions. Consider this. Are you speaking truth to your soul each day? Are Your words spoken or unspoken? True and loving, kind and encouraging. Always. Have you ever told a lie? Have you ever spoken harshly to someone? Have you ever taken a paper clip from the office or made copies without paying for them at the office? The truth is we all need forgiveness. We need to lighten our soul, a receiving forgiveness and then extending forgiveness to others, forgiving others as well as receiving forgiveness, and we are just one step away from forgiveness. There is no series of steps only a receiving of what has already been done for you then extending to others to forgiveness you received from the one who created you. The Bible also speaks of truth. I love it. That truth is unchanging. Our stories, our perceptions are everchanging. Contemporary Culture may call them our truths, but they're not truths. Truth is constant. It's static, it's unchanging, and that's really good news. Amidst life's chaos and mess, we can cling to unchanging truth, much like a shelter in the cleft of a rock. In the midst of a storm, we can find shelter and foundation in truth which allows us to embrace something better, to embrace and live a loved life which allows us to create a lovely life to live loved as author Lisa terkeurst says, to live loved is not awesome and we're just one step away from that, from change, from turning and coming to life as it was supposed to be. One step away from enjoying living life on purpose, living life out loud, using all our gifts and talents, living loved, love getting our soul filled with love. We have long for perhaps you have. Strive for this longer than you would care to admit. Trying everything and finding that nothing fills your soul. Need. Love a settling into just being and receiving love, a confidence and peace that you are loved because the creator of the universe declares his love for you and the evidence of that love is found in his son Jesus, Jesus, Yeshua, Messiah, Savior on the Cross for me and for you, he demonstrated surrender. The king of all creation demonstrated, demonstrated surrender with his arms wide open and surrender to God. The father, Jesus, his arms wide open to receive those who receive him and this life of love. It's not one about restrictions or regulations and rules, religion that mankind has created that has no life of love. This love life is all about relationship. A relationship with the one who loves perfectly his life in us is a grand awakening to all we were and are created to be his life in us is abounding joy and grand adventure and this life given us until until death do us part. We soon come to realize that his love has never let us go. That one step perhaps for you, it may just be turning back around to him or it may be stepping into the invitation he has given you by his life, for you. In his presence is where our soul is nourished, filled, loved. Take that step. You're not alone and

Have you ever been afflicted with rats you know, really awful thoughts or been plagued with stinking thinking? Do you find that you are stuck in life and can't move along? On today's podcast, I am both honored and excited to have my friend and published author Kathy Anderson, as my guest. She is an expert on making choices about what she thinks on call it mindfulness or call it mindset reset. Kathy offers help to those who are stuck in negative thinking. Let me tell you a little bit about my guest. Cathy Anderson is a teacher, a public speaker, student of Biblical Studies, and Longtime Christ follower. She is one of the kindest women I have ever had the pleasure to know. She is a friend to so many women with joy in her eyes and a smile on her face. She demonstrates putting others first with her care and love. Kathy has been married to her amazing husband, Dan for over 30 years. Their love story is one of faith and love that is pretty incredible. Kathy, his mom to three grown children, one daughter in law, and she's a grandma to one grandbaby. Kathy enjoys writing music, reading and writing books, and loves anything related to health and fitness. Her journey to reclaim her health is inspiring. She currently lives in Lancaster, Pennsylvania, where she teaches health and fitness classes for women who have been rescued out of sex trafficking. Cathy's new book, recalculating walkaway from negative thinking with the course correcting power of words was released last fall and became an Amazon's hot new release as well as an Amazon number one best seller. So here with me on today's podcast is Kathy Anderson. Cathy, thank you so much for joining me today. Sandra. It is such an honor to be here on your show. Thank you. Well, Kathy, we shared a little bit about your topic about recalculating. Could you tell us more about your topic and why it's so important? Sure. Sandra, you know, you probably remember the Tom Tom Navigation system prompt that would chime in, you know, anytime that there was a roadblock or a detour or like a traffic jam and it would say the words recalculating and then it would find you a new route to get you to your destination. It would redirect you so you could still get to where you wanted to go and I got to thinking, wouldn't it be nice if our lives actually came equipped with our very own internal navigation system that would recalculate another route for us whenever our lives got off track? Wouldn't that be. Yes, Yes, and in our society that we live in right here in the US, I, I think especially here in the metropolitan hubbub, you know, the east coast where I live, negative thinking is just one of those roadblocks in our lives. Negative thinking is just so pervasive and widespread. It, it just seems to dominate the tone of most of the media. The at facebook or other social media, TV, you know, podcasts talk shows and I find that I can hardly have a conversation anymore without some sort of negativity creeping in and just dominating the direction of the discussion and it just seems like negative negativity is just steering the focus of our lives and it's sowing seeds of discouragement and depression, anxiety and really it's just all around us and it's. It's basically infiltrated the very fabric of our nation and it's actually making us sick and because people have been so immersed in negativity, they think, speak and behave negatively as a result. So you know, when you're steeped in it, it gets in you. It becomes part of you. And you know what's so fascinating to me, Sandra, it's that most people don't even realize that they're trapped in a negative mindset and that they need to recalculate. You know, to find another route, another pathway to a healthier way of thinking, speaking and behaving. And so I wrote my book recalculating as sort of a guidebook to give a new set of directions to take us off the negative road that we often find ourselves on and our words are a huge part of the course correcting process. So my book basically helps the reader to identify areas of negativity in their life and to make a course correction by implementing an amazingly effective technique that God actually invented. And it's called renewing your mind. And so it's basically just learning to think the way God thinks and you know, it's, it's all based on scripture rather than thinking the way the world around us. Thanks. Well that's, that's really very compelling thoughts and I know that would resonate with so many people and as you said it, we become a meshed in that thinking. We aren't even aware of it sometimes. What are some common myths related to negative thinking? Well, I would say that one common myth is that a lot of people believe that it's normal and appropriate to speak negatively if a situation isn't going the way that they'd like and that to speak otherwise is being fake or is being phony or hypocritical. But this couldn't be farther than the truth. Sandra, because you see it's okay to not like something that's happening. And to be honest about it and to be upset by it, but it's not okay to stay there in that negative place. See what I'm saying is it's not okay to marinate yourself in that negative mindset. It's actually scientifically proven to be hurtful to the body and the mind to do that. Wow. And the amazing thing is it's these very situations, the ones that we don't like that are the very situations that we need to be recalculating our thoughts so that they steer away from negative thinking and to embrace a different faith-filled perspective. One that aligns itself with how God sees the situation. And you know, this is, this is simple, but it's really, it's, it's profound in its life, a life changing concept for most people and it can truly revolutionize, revolutionize their lives. Yeah. Oh, that's, that's wonderful. Have you run into the other myths that people have a question to ask you about? Um, yeah, there's, there's, there's a lot. Um, I'm sorry I wasn't prepared for all that. That's okay. If you don't mind. I was just going to have, as you were talking, it made me think about, um, because I think we think it's mutually exclusive. Um, I had, uh, it seems silly now, but my two dogs got lost and it was pretty traumatic for me and my, my daughter as I'm going through this and just agonizing over them. Um, and my daughter said to me, mom, no matter the circumstances or the outcome, are you going to be able to praise God? Yes. So is that Kinda what you're speaking of with thinking? Yes. Brilliant. Just aligning yourself with how God sees the situation and to be able to be thankful because you know, when you're renewing your mind and you're recalculating away from the negative, even if that situation doesn't change, you have changed. And what your daughter reminded you to do was really to have a faith filled perspective, to keep your eyes focused on God. Even though you know something terrible was happening and the unknown was there with, you know, your, your pups that you love so much and you were able to steer your way away from that negative thinking and to just keep a faith filled perspective by, you know, by keeping your focus on the Lord and thanking him. Well, and I like what you said is that also reminded me that, you know, I certainly couldn't be thankful for that circumstances. My dogs were lost. They were in peril, but I could be thankful in that circumstance because God is saying he doesn't change according to circumstances. He remains the same. That's right. Absolutely. Oh, that's wonderful. Well, your book, which I've had the pleasure to read, is it speaks about your own journey and challenges in life. Would you please share with us which hurdles you personally faced and how did you overcome them? Yep. So, so earlier I referred to a scenario describing how two different people might choose to walk through the same set of difficult circumstances. You know, one was a negative perspective and one with a face perspective. And I used illness as an example. Well, I was both of those people. I was describing my own responses as I walked through a debilitating illness just a few short years ago actually. And I'm still walking down that healing road. I'm not completely well yet, but I'm approaching greater health and vitality each day. But, um, so my story is when, when my doctor told me that I would be dead by Christmas, which at the time was only about six months away, I knew that I needed to do something pretty major. And that's when the Lord led me to discover the dynamic power of really renewing my mind. And, and so, you know, God speaks and it's done. He's, he's the god of endless possibilities. And he uses his words to create all that there is. And he still uses his words to recreate, to create. And we're made in his image. So just like our heavenly father creates with his words, we have been granted the mind boggling privilege of using our words to create also and, and our thoughts. And our words are like tiny little seeds and they grow into plants that bear fruit in our lives. And so what we sow, we reap because in Galatians it says people only harvest what they plant. And so for me, it had to start with the conclusions that I was making about my circumstances, my health and the diagnosis that I was given. I had to make a choice. Was I going to become engulfed in what I saw with my eyes and felt in my body and what was happening around me? Or was I going to view my situation at a higher level? You know, just basically daring to believe what God said about me in his word and about my circumstances. So I had a choice there. And as difficult as it was, much of the time I chose to trust and embrace what the Lord says was my inheritance in his word. And I chose to trust that over my circumstances. So it was a conscious choice. And so I began reading and writing out scriptures about health from the Bible. And I began reading them to my body. And now I know that, that sounds r

Waiting, waiting in line at the food store, do you always search out the shortest line or the line? It seems to be moving the quickest only to have it slow to a turtle's pace. Once you join it, waiting in traffic as it snarls along, slowing to a snail's pace, waiting for your turn for your appointment, the your next phenomenon, waiting in a queue only to have someone but in line and boy are you irritated. Waiting, not my strength as I mutter under my breath at the annoyance and the nerve of some people. Are you waiting for anything on today's podcast? This is what I will be talking about. Waiting, waiting on these little things, the waiting in line at a food store or a box store waiting for your turn in line, waiting to be called for your appointment, but then there is this other type of waiting waiting until we do something or accomplish something or achieve something. Perhaps waiting for something to come to an end or for a new beginning. Waiting. It isn't my strong point. It often feels more like punishment or banishment. Delayed gratification. Why must I wait? Whether self imposed or beyond my control, I do not do well with waiting. I almost always ask why and in waiting when it's self imposed, it is usually as punishment like I won't buy myself nice clothes until I lose some weight because I don't want to buy fat clothes and like me with the clothes. Sometimes the waiting is self imposed. We put off things waiting for that perfect situation or until we lose weight or until we get our hair colored or until after vacation or waiting perhaps waiting for your children to get a bit older so you can pursue that hobby or dream or maybe waiting for a new job to arise or a circumstance to change so that you can enjoy life. Waiting for circumstances to change leaves us in a state of discord with our soul. Our children deal with waiting. They can hardly wait until they are in the next grade or in high school or can go to college. We went through this to our children can hardly wait until they can drive until they are emancipated. They're waiting for that time to come. Oh, we miss so much when we focus on the waiting, why don't we put things off and wait. Sometimes it has indeed beyond our control, the waiting, like waiting for our farm to sell here in New Jersey. I must wait for the buyer to come along and see the wonder and beauty that I saw in this place or waiting to hear back from a possible job or opportunity. There is the waiting til you find that one you want to marry. This can be a hard waiting as months and years passed by waiting or married now, waiting to get pregnant. Perhaps the heartrending waiting to see if you can get pregnant. Times of waiting. It can be a trial to our soul, a heaviness of our spirit, a weight on her heart, joy buried beneath the burden of waiting. Then there's this soul wracking waiting, the nerve wracking, waiting to hear back from the doctor about a diagnosis or a prognosis. Wondering as you wait, what will life look like after you received the news? How long will you have? How many days to be with the ones you love waiting or you may already have a medical diagnosis, but you wait to see how the situation will play out for you. What will life look like for you and your loved ones when you're dealing with this medical condition or there is a waiting to hear back from an adult child that has become a stranger, not having heard from them in weeks or months or perhaps even years wondering as you wait, what their life is like, how they're doing, waiting or there's the waiting here back from an attorney regarding an issue that looms like a dark cloud, waiting for responses. What will happen in each imagined scenario? Waiting for answers, waiting. It's part of life's journey. Does it ever get easier? I don't think so. We wait, hands folded or wringing our hands and our hearts mind weighed down with worry, disturbing our thoughts and our sleep and our life, holding onto thoughts and worries and concerns and wondering as we wait. Yet we can't escape waiting and not being able to escape. The weighting feels almost like we are trapped. Hemmed in by three sides as we wait for the gate of the fourth side to open and we focus on the waiting. The. I can't wait until I graduate from high school. I can't wait until I finished college and get a good job. I can't wait until I get married. I can't wait until I have children. I can't wait until I'm doing the thing that I love. We finally have enough money to take the vacations we want or purchased the house we want. We can't wait until that happens. Waiting instead of living and enjoying life now, waiting for the opportunity to happen or the event to occur or the news to be revealed. We wait and in most cases of waiting while we are waiting, we miss out on what is right before us. If we focus on the waiting amidst the weighting amidst the annoyances and the anx anxiousness, we miss life amidst the pain. Amidst the heartache we miss what could be we miss the life before us or when things are more grim, when the waiting is health related or financial burdens are relationship related. Still, when we focus on the waiting, we are giving it far more power than it's meant to have. Waiting does serve a purpose. If we had the right focus and the right mindset, it's not easy, the simple statement of waiting because it has a purpose, but this thought from Ann voskamp musing sums up what we can do while waiting and it changes our perspective. It changes our mindset. This truth can be applied to any situation easier to deal with some than others, but it is applicable to any situation and says while waiting, do what waiters do. Serve easy but not necessarily simple. As I said, it begins with a mindset shift, and truly this mindset can be applied to any situation we faced, regardless of the difficulty and more powerful commensurate with how difficult the waiting is. For instance, my beloved friend and mentor, Helene, she served an even even when she was bedridden due to poorly executed healthcare, which eventually took her life. She continued to reach out to women to encourage them in their life's mission, speaking truth to them, her mindset was serving even if it meant no longer traveling abroad. To share her message even well, it meant that her arena was now beside her hospital bed. She still served in her waiting, a sweet young woman, a new bride has stage four breast cancer, yet she serves with her blog and her kind spirit. She is painfully aware that her time is short, but her mindset is to educate, encourage, and share her journey of facing cancer. You can check out her blog@Polka.dot queen. Friends who are financially in very difficult situations offer help to those indeed. Friends who have a large family on a small income waiting for there needs to be met. Seek ways they can help and share and give, and as heart eight crushes us, waiting for a relationship to be restored. We can lift others hearts and encourage them serving them while we wait. What I'm saying is that we can serve while we're waiting in whatever circumstance we are waiting for, even when it is difficult and seemingly impossible, it is a mind mindshift should excuse me, a mind shift that must occur. So I began asking myself as I've had a season of waiting, how I can serve those in my life as I wait because my waiting, it is by comparison much easier than the ones I described.  Nonetheless, it is still challenging to remain mindful, engaged in the moment, refusing to worry about each scenario that creeps into my mind while I wait. Rather I serve, I'm. I'll be there for others. I served by listening and caring and sharing. There are ways to serve while in the waiting phase, there are ways to serve well in the wilderness, have life when things are not particularly clear as to what the next step is. And this is right where I am. Have you ever experienced this too? So while we wait, we serve. There are ways to serve right in our backyard and oftentimes in our homes. So today I have asked myself how can I serve my young adult children? Each one is going off on their own life journey with changes and challenges all their own. How can I serve my husband and I do not mean this as being his doormat, but how can I make his day a bit easier? How can I walk in his shoes, having and showing compassion for all he goes through each day? How can I serve my friends each with their own sandwich, life of caring for children at home and parents and need friends that face health challenges or financial challenges or emotional pain? I also asked myself, how can I serve elsewhere in my current neighborhood, in my current community and beyond? Sometimes the serving is just greeting a neighbor and visiting with them as we see one another at the mailbox or in the local store. Sometimes the serving is offering a smile to someone who may not return it, but they've seen it. They've seen your smile serving can be actually asking the cashier how they are doing and really mean it, engaging their heart, and I love this example of my serving. An example of serving my dear friend always does. After placing our meal order, she asks the server since we will be praying over our meal, is there anything that you would like prayer for? Out of the numerous times I have witnessed her asking this, the response is heartwarming. There has only been one time where the waiter has said, no, I'm good. Everyone else was so touched by her caring and by her serving even in my cyber community as I wait. How can I serve and share? There's always good we can do. There's always ways to reach out serving and loving others. My heart is stirred by the stories who reach out from their hospital bed waiting but serving. There are stories of those who are imprisoned for their faith, having done nothing wrong yet they keep keeping continue serving, and there are those who have little yet served out of what they have while we wait served. It chan

What is a healthy body image? Do you have one or do you know of anyone who has one, and if they do, are they truly satisfied with what their body looks like? Hi, Sandra Vernon with the art of connection and on today's podcast I will be addressing the issue of body image and how we can choose to reign in this runaway negative thought pattern that does more harm than good and achieving the goals for fitness, health and a joy filled life. And when we ran in our thought pattern to conform to a positive body image, we begin to a positive movement and momentum that is perspective changing and life impacting. I go through three fleeting moments where my body image is positive and accepting. I'm working on and making progress in these positive body images being more sustainable, but I still struggle with longer periods where I silently yet nearly constantly remind myself what my mirror self tells me. And at eight pretty or I see a picture of myself and I think a hug. I look like a turtle and then I even say meaner comments like I look like Jabba the hut or that my neck and Chin makes me look like an Iguana. Wow. How mean is that this self-loathing is harmful and it strengthens the message. Shame gives us and the message is all about image, body, image and appearance which is fleeting in and of itself. The sands of time shift, the inevitable occurs as gravity does its work. Sure we can slow the process. We can live our most healthy, healthy self and these are good things to do to live healthy, but the obsession to achieve and maintain a look that is computer curated or photo edited is so unfair. It's unfair because it's impossible to achieve. It's. It's what the media shows us. Why the obsession? Obsession with appearance. Why not focus on overall wellbeing? Instead, after all, should our happiness be based on our appearance and how we view our body? Shouldn't life be more about how we are walking out our life with purpose, living out our personal mission and vision? Shouldn't we live life and have it be how successful our relationships, our and our personal health, the obsession with appearance will fall into its place, proper place. Then when we focus on these other things, and it is a process to go through the building up of a healthy, positive body image, it takes time to curate positive affirmations, speaking to yourself in a positive manner, letting your brain grasp the message, letting it sink in, and then uproot. The negative thinking is like weeding a garden. You get the soil cleared out and it looks great until a few days later. Weeds appear eventually with continuous weeding. They're all eradicated. The weeds from the garden and the negative self talk can be also be eradicated from our minds, but we must remain diligent in our mind. Weeding. For instance, I confess that I'm still waiting because it is a process and with me over the past several years, the things I told myself cosby to avoid dressing rooms all together and then I was only buying clothes that were big, boxy, loose and comfy. Yet these clothes though they were soft and comfy, left me feeling frumpy and unattractive, especially when I caught myself passing my image of myself in the mirror and then again the negative talk ensued so then I would go to my closet for something else to wear to look nicer and seeing clothes I want spit into each piece seemed to accuse me and shame me, leaving me feeling pretty bad about myself from the clothes on my body and clothes in a closet I could no longer wear. And then here's where the choice comes. And this is where I came to this hinge point. So today, ladies, this is our call to action. The process I went through is realizing I could continue to do what I was doing, which left me feeling unconfident and oftentimes flat out rotten about myself or I could choose to dress my body with kindness. And by this I mean choosing clothes that fit my body and in turn maybe feel a bit better. With this turning point comes forward. Momentum for change. So my hinge point, what I learned was I had a choice. I could either spend my life being at war with my body and hating it endlessly, dieting or trying some new fad out. They're shaming myself for getting to this point in the first place, using exercise as punishment rather than Movement for pleasure, or I could choose to embrace my body, move it for pleasure and live a joy filled life now and in the process of making healthy changes and increased fitness, I could start dressing like I wanted to now rather than waiting till I lost weight, which never seemed to happen. It was a horrible cycle, so I am no longer going to be miserable. I'm bummed about my size. I chose to embrace my body where it is now, and this is a process as I remind myself each day, that body image is not about how I look in the mirror or in the image I hold in my mind, but body images about how I feel about the way I look and it's a thing to be developed for me. It starts out with being okay with my current Avatar. Yeah, I liked the synology, referring to our bodies as an Avatar. Just moving toward liking my body just as it is just as I am, and here's the step by step process I took. They're really just five little steps. The first one was I created a, what I wrote, uh, what, which is really just setting a goal for myself. I was very descriptive in what I wanted to achieve for my body image. For instance, I wanted to have a body positive that is consistent and lived out loud as, as an example to others. And then I had to write a vision for myself, uh, why? Why do I want this for my life and how will my life be different in obtaining this school? I knew if I had a, a positive body image, it would impact all other parts of my life. Step two. So step one was running a goal and a vision of what do you want and why do you want it? Step two, once I had a goal and a vision for my goal, I created some action steps to get the ball rolling. You have to have momentum to make change. And creating action steps was where I had measurable goals and this was essential to see that I was making progress or tweaking things if I needed to, if I got stuck somewhere, step three, then I began doing body positive things, speaking kindly to my mirror image. I started with just a glance in the mirror because I mostly avoid them and then I built from there. Now I give myself I can't eye contact while they brush my teeth with my charcoal infused toothpaste, also known as black toothpaste and I actually check out my outfit in the mirror before leaving the house. These two practices alone were unheard of months ago. Then getting movement into my day, also known as exercise every day, and it's things that I enjoy. I have never been one who really loved the gym, but I do enjoy pilates and Barre classes. I enjoy walking and hiking and riding my horses. Accountability is key too, and this is where face society was birthed and flourishes in community and accountability without competition. So I surrounded myself with ladies who encouraged me, helped me over and challenges and I did the same for them. These things were my action steps in step three, step four. The next step was an obstacle I had to step over. But Oh, did it make a huge difference? Here's what I did. I started shopping for nice looking clothes that fit me well, but I was so out of practice I needed help and here's the help I had and I highly recommend this help because it made a huge difference in this turning point for me. And I didn't wait till all the weight was off. I didn't wait to lay. Everything was positive and everything was kosher with me. I did this for myself in process. Um, so what I did is instead of just going to and pulling clothes off racks, ones that I knew were at least one size bigger than I needed and didn't concern myself much about style or fit, just coverage. I sought help and my little helper is stitch fix. I love this company, stitch fix. And there are others like them, but this is the one I'm familiar with. I've used them since I started this process and continue to use them as my body. My avatar transitions, yes, I'm not the size I prefer to be and it is a size that is no longer appearance driven, but health driven in time. I know I'll get there, but I'm allowing myself clothes that make me feel lovely, make me feel comfortable and nice and not oversized so I no longer dressing frumpy clothes that just cover me, but I dress in a way that honors my body and the process I'm going through, and I'm doing this by dressing in a word Nice. The size issue is part of the process too, but I choose to no longer obsessed about it or saying mean things to myself about it. Step five, then I began making changes my health and fitness routine changes that were viable, sustainable, and reasonable changes that were no longer driven by our youth. Obsessed media propagated culture, but changes that I knew were good for me, good for my mindset, good for my health, and through it all, I realized that we mom's model body image to our children in profound ways. Perhaps this alone will be the impetus for change to model positive image to your children in the midst of your process, even before you feel better about yourself. Body image, it is just our avatar and how we feel about it and it is too easy to be unkind to what we live in. It takes work to change the negative messages we tell ourselves, and these messages are reinforced by our society. Truly anything worthwhile takes effort and work, but it is so worth it. We become better versions of ourselves as we leave the hindrance, the negative body image that once changed, changed our souls and embrace with love where our soul lives in this magnificent body. Until next time, this is Sandra Vernon with the art of connection. You can follow me on face society, on instagram or facebook and coming soon. Pinterest.

On today's podcast, I will be speaking about a popular word, but with a twist. Sandra Vernon here with the art of connection and the topic for today is beauty, but first a quote, would you agree with what Alice Walker has to say about beauty? Whenever we are creating beauty, we are restoring our soul. Before you answer, I want to first define beauty. Beauty is a combination of qualities that pleases the senses, especially site. We know what this beauty looks like. It is skin, deep fashion, conscious and captivates attention. It's often marveled at and just as often subjective because as the saying goes, beauty is in the eyes of the beholder and the short view of beauty that we see beauty, the sands of time quickly adjust. There isn't art to aging gracefully and beautifully and when we focus not only on appearance but with this twist on beauty. The aging process can be done with grace and it tends to be a breeze. The beauty of which I speak, the twist on beauty of which I mentioned is enduring beauty. This beauty, it's timeless and goes beyond the surface and while being partnered with appearance, it is not limited to the constraints of appearance. How often have you known of an incredible beauty? She's lovely to behold, only to have the illusion shattered when the word spoken are anything but beautiful or the attitude a cervic or downright nasty. Enduring beauty is a character quality. This beauty originates from our heart and soul. It is a beauty that scripture encourages we women to develop just as we can develop the skills of enhancing our physical beauty by learning how to artfully apply makeup style our hair and dress well, making the most of our appearance, the character quality of beauty can we also developed enduring beauty, pours forth out of a woman's heart that is filled with love. Enduring beauty is focused on others. It's inviting, welcoming and encouraging. Enduring beauty creates and in so creating. Our soul is nourished and refreshed and each of us are uniquely equipped to create beauty in our lives. As I said, we do this with our appearance and also as we develop our character and yet beauty extends from our hands to when we put our unique gifts and talents to use. This is where each of us is unique. There is no one us and no one puts these gifts to work quite like you or quite like me. My friend is a jeweler. I love the pieces she creates and yet another friend creates Julie. That jewelry that is quite lovely to hers is just different and they're equally as beautiful jewelers. Both of them are but so different in how they apply their gifts. I have a friend or friends rather who are authors. One writes fiction and a few others write nonfiction beauty in the creation with a message unique to each author. The beauty of gardens, whether floral or herbal or vegetable or some combination are beautiful, different, different textures, different fragrances, different colors. All beauty created by the hands of the gardener or the beauty of motherhood. Many of us have been blessed with each of us. Moms operating in our own unique flavoring of motherhood. It's beautiful, too often we refrained from using the very things that would bless others. I have found this in my life as I transitioned from motherhood, motherhood to Maven life, navigating new waters, sorting out past stuff that I was mired in and I found that I was mired in a shame storm for me, shamed kept my gifts under wraps, and if you want more information on shame, check out my podcast on that topic with shame. I disqualified myself, disqualified myself from using any of my giftings because the shame message icon do convinced me that I had nothing of value to offer or contribute what ally and I listened to it. I believed it and I operated in it. Missing out on beauty and missing out on a lie a lot from this life. So when we do this, the world misses out on all we have to offer and all that we can contribute. Each of us have gifts and talents that are unique to the package of us. There are women with face society who are gifted with hospitality and entertaining. It just comes so easy and natural for them that they think they've done nothing. Yet there are women who create such lovely homes. They are places that are inviting, welcoming and peaceful, a place where we want to terry and spend some time. It's creating beauty in their home and there are women who have a contagious sense of humor that invites all to participate in and enjoy, and then there are the bakers or chefs in our group who with ease, create delicious foods and treats. Each one of these unique gifts is in a way creating beauty. There are for either the young, the old or the infirm who's tender heart creates a place for safety and love. We create in our careers at home with friends at church where we might volunteer. They're all opportunities to create beauty using the gifts and talents that we have. And this is not an exhaustive list by any means. I just wanted to share so you could hear all of these beautiful gifts, many of which you might possess and don't even acknowledge them as gifts. And often we are far too easily and frequently say, ah, they're nothing. Yet they're each a way and a means of creating beauty. And so I want you to use yours to create beauty where you are, the world needs you and what you have to offer to reveal enduring beauty in your sphere of influence. In this season of life. Don't believe me? Well, perhaps like me. Shame is chaining you down. Please check out my podcast as I mentioned earlier on shame. I don't want you to lose another day mired in shame. I spent way too many wasted years there we women are meant to nurture relationships and create beauty. And when we allow ourselves to operate in this manner, we experienced joy as we are creating our own unique, enduring beauty. We are created for nurturing relationships, creating beauty as a way to reflect who god is. We do this by cultivating the beauty unique to our lives, using the talents we have and in using these gifts are beauty is revealed more and more. I love this truth. God, the master artist and creator of all things proclaimed on the last day of his creation that it was all very good after he made eve. Ladies, we are the crowning glory of all creation. Isn't that awesome? God proclaimed after each phase of creation that it was good. He was pleased with his work. Each day that he created and all the things that he created in it, he called it good, but it wasn't until eve was created that God proclaimed that it was not just good, but very good. Let that sink in. We need to walk in mindfulness of this truth. Truly the world needs what we women have to offer. We must ignore them, world's messages from the media, social media, etc. And claim to the truth of the feminine power through enduring beauty and loving, nurturing relationships. And as I said, it's going to be unique and wonderful according to each one of us. How often in this world are women attacked or sequestered away or covered to hide their beautiful appearance? To prevent the world from receiving their beautiful offerings or perhaps the reverse? Exposing ourselves in ways that almost perverts captivating beauty and damages allure. Why this attack against women that has occurred since the beginning of time? It's precisely because we are the crowning glory of creation that the enemy of our souls wants to destroy or at least prevent us from creating beauty and blessing those around us. What we offer is women cannot be offered by men. Yes, they have their own unique contributions, but feminine power. It is not what the current culture is. Spouses, so when we allow ourselves to create beauty, we are reflecting god's character, quality of creating. We reflect a bit of how things were supposed to be and one day will be restored and we can live in this hope, the hope of restoration to operate fully in the captivating but that we were created for. in the meantime, when we allow our beauty to be revealed, when we feel we are captivating, it is a thing to behold. It is feminine power at it's mightiest. Queen warriors, try this. If you are not driving or doing something that requires you to use your eyes, close them and think about. Imagine yourself when you feel your loveliest. What are you wearing? Be specific and describe this well, note the detail of your clothing and how you feel in it. Think about your hair and makeup. How has your hair fixed? How is your makeup different than the day to day wear or your lack of makeup? got your picture in mind. Hold on to it. One of the times I felt my loveliest was in a lovely gown that I wore to a fundraiser. The skirt is a stunning red silk with beating over the sweetheart bodice. There is tool under the skirt which gives this a ballgown effect and gives more of an hourglass figure. My hair is an in an updated that makes me feel elegant and my makeup. It's simple, but it makes me feel pretty. I walk differently in this gown, not because of the small hills I am wearing, but because of an attitude I take on in this beautIful gown and as the evening progresses I find I am behaving a bit differently too, in a good refined way. Okay. How about you? What are you feeling? Dressed up in your loveliest. Can you imagine this or perhaps you need to work on even imagining this because sometimes we get stuck in our day to day life and can't imagine much else. That's okay. It takes practice as you give yourself permission to dream and imagine and a lot of the time it only requires that we actually get out of our sweat or sweats or yoga pants, put on some nicer clothes and a bit of makeup even if we are going to stay home all day. Just doing this does wonders for shifting our mindset. Take some time to do this exercise and think about how you would go about your day dressed, elegantly dressed in your loveliest feeling, your love list. We are different wearing a ball gown than we are when we were our swe

Our theology is best expressed in our hospitality. What do you think about this quote? What does our hospitality say about us? In today's podcast, I'll be talking about hospitality. It is another way we can connect with others and here at face society it's all about the art of connection. Hospitality. It is both something we do and a gift some possess. You know those people that are both warm and welcoming and have a home that is so inviting. It isn't that everything is perfect, but that these people have the gift of making their home come together in such lovely ways that I don't even imagine. I can't even imagine, but like those pinterest crafts I attempt to copy. We can all be hospitable offering hospitality just as we all have gifts. We can sing songs, doodle or draw and some are more gifted in these areas than others. We each have gifts unique to ourselves that contribute to our world in ways that are beautiful, but even in these areas where we may not be gifted or we may not excel, we can learn and use these things. Hospitality, I believe is one of them. Hospitality, it's defined as the friendly and generous reception and entertainment have guests, visitors or strangers, and in this definition even I can practice hospitality. My home is never super neat and tidy. My place mats, if I remember to use them or a mismatch with one or two that should have been washed before being placed out for guests, but no worries. I just turned it over and let a family member used the dirty one. If I remember, I'll get fresh flowers, do a quick vacuum and a cursory dusting, tidy up a bit, the powder room and prep, whatever foods that will be offered. I follow some lovely ladies on Instagram who are amazing and the creation of their banquet type title tables. They're truly gifted ladies and I admire their that gift and how they operate in it. I gather ideas from these ladies but also cut myself slack because this is not a natural or a gifting area of mine hospitality, but I opened my door to friends, acquaintances, and loved to entertain with theme parties and as hospitality is defined, I am hitting the mark. Hospitality doesn't always have to look all pretty, but she'd always fulfill a need for companionship, fellowship meeting, deep heart needs. Hospitality opens the door for connection and we can be hospitable everyday by being engaged in the moment with a person we are with listening, hearing, loving. This to me is being hos hospitable. It's offering hospitality. Offering hospitality is more of a mindset than a setting of a table. I think that we can offer hospitality as traditionally in our home, but outside our home as well. Hospitality is most often opening up our home for others to come enjoy a meal and in and enjoy some companionship, but I think it doesn't need to be limited to this. We can practice doing one thing for one person that we wish we could do for everyone. I believe this is offering a hospitality. Perhaps it's visiting a lonely neighbor down the road. You know the one that you just never see come out very often. Sometimes their papers collected the end of their driveway. Reaching out to them in hospitality could do wonders, or perhaps hospitality is inviting a friend who feels left out or forgotten. I can't tell you how many times throughout my life I never quite felt like I fit in somewhere and then God bless a woman who would reach out to me and hospitality, inviting me in. So hospitality I believe is a mindset and heartset as much as having a beautiful home and a beautiful table set for people to come and enjoy. Perhaps hospitality is seeing a homeless person and inviting them to join you for a diner dinner and give them a meal regardless of what they might do after. Because this is a no judgment zone. We want to just offer hospitality. It's a unique way to approach life because it offers a kind and safe place for others to recline for awhile. Most often in our home, but always in our presence. Those who join us can be our neighbors. A Study Group of book club or any group where they might meet in our homes so we can offer hospitality or it may be that we meet with a friend for a coffee or walk offering our hearts and our listening ear. I believe his hospitality to and as we do open our homes in our lives and hospitality, people can then let their guard down when they are around with around us. Trust begins to build and they feel safe to share their lives, both the pain and the joy that comes in their lives. As connections are developed and community grows in the offering of hospitality, and we don't need to create an attempt to explain a way suffering, but we can offer that a safe place for those who are suffering. This is hospitality to how well do we live. Broken and open and honest. Is Our door open to our inner life wide open walls, broken down, living raw and authentic and honest and vulnerable. This is the call that Ann Voskamp says to us. Have you ever just wished you would be invited in to be a part of a gathering? Hospitality invites. It has the power to leave us vulnerable, approachable facade down and authenticity lived full on. The fruit of hospitality is manifold. With hospitality. We are creating a community community of living loved even in the midst of pain or suffering. If we each risk being vulnerable, living broken, as Ann Voskamp says, and living authentic, being genuine, then we can make a huge impact and a huge difference in the lives of others. And guess what? Along the way, our heart doesn't ache as much either what we believe is lived out in our actions. It begins with our thought life, our mindset, so what we believe is lived out in them in the actions of our lives. Hospitality is one thought to set our minds on and grow in love. Hospitality is one way we can get out of our own way and live life and community and connection. We can reach up, reach out our hands and love. We can walk over to that hurting person. We can invite them in and sure along the way if we want to, we can learn how to make our table more beautiful, our food presentation more appealing from those who are gifted with hospitality. It is a gift for some one that I just acknowledge and and revel in and it is a skill that the rest of us can learn or copy. Today's call to action. We can practice doing one thing for one person that we wish we could do for everyone. Let's make a difference. Let's offer hospitality to one person, then the next one, then the next one that comes along our way. Let's live our theology out loud for the world to see. Let's live what we believe, demonstrating that connections are an art to be practiced and community. I think that he cultivated where each of us can belong, live, loved, and experienced what it is to be beloved for the next seven days. Let's look out for ways that we can open our home in hospitality ways. We can extend hospitality outside her home. I would love to hear how it goes. Follow face society on Instagram or facebook and let me know our community would be encouraged to hear from you. For now, this is Sandra Vernon with face society.