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The Best of You

The Best of You

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Join therapist and author, Dr. Alison Cook, as she guides you through some of your toughest challenges with wisdom, kindness, and grace. Together with friends and experts we'll unpack the best of psychology from a faith-based perspective. You’ll discover how to break free from painful patterns, mend your past, and discover what brings out the best of you.

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Have you or someone you love struggled with depression? If so, you’re not alone. Rates of depression have increased in the past few years, and my guest today is here to give us hopeful, helpful, science-backed wisdom on how to name, frame, and brave a path out of depression. From identifying the subtle signs of mild depression to addressing more severe and persistent symptoms, our conversation will equip you with practical tools and strategies to tackle depression. Whether you're personally struggling or supporting a loved one, this episode will help you find clarity and direction. My guest today, Dr. Len Lantz, is one of America's top psychiatrists and a clinical assistant professor in psychiatry at the University of Washington School of Medicine. He is the editor of www.psychiatryresource.com, and he maintains a clinical practice at Big Sky Psychiatry in Helena, Montana. **Content Warning: This episode briefly touches on the topic of suicide. We want you to feel safe and cared for while listening, so please take care, or if you need to skip this one, consider asking a friend to listen on your behalf. Here’s what we cover: 1. Why mental health diagnoses are hard to get right (10:53) 2. Current statistics on increasing rates of depression (16:51) 3. Signs and symptoms of depression (18:21) 4. Debunking stigmas about depression in faith-based communities (22:53) 5. Research-backed interventions for mild depression (25:48) 6. Proven medical options for treating severe or stubborn depression (33:38) 7. How to support a loved one struggling with depression (38:56) Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Go to https://hensonshaving.com and enter BESTOFYOU at checkout to get 100 free blades with your purchase. (Note: you must add both the 100-blade pack and the razor for the discount to apply.) This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Give all the fathers in your life a unique, heartfelt gift you’ll all cherish for years—StoryWorth! Right now, save $10 on your first purchase when you go to StoryWorth.com/bestofyou! Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Whether you're exploring distant lands or enjoying a staycation at home, Cozy Earth has your back. Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU. Related Episodes: Episode 104: Overcoming the Fear of Vulnerability—Strategies to Stop Feeling Alone and Build Meaningful Connections Episode 106: Transform Limiting Beliefs, Embrace Critical Thinking, & Navigate Holistic Health with Dr. Josh Axe Episode 33: People Pleasing & Developing Your Own Inner Compass: Thoughts on Depression, Mental Health & the Church, and Finding Hope in Dark Places Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Have you wondered how a single negative comment can shape your beliefs about yourself? In this episode, we dive into the crucial distinction between critical thinking and limiting beliefs, exploring how they shape our decisions. My guest, Dr. Josh Axe, author of the New York Times bestselling book, Think This, Not That, shares his personal story of overcoming a powerful limiting belief and helping his mom navigate through cancer. He offers some powerful critiques of our current medical model, and some practical tips to navigate a more holistic way towards health. Do not miss this thought-provoking episode! Here’s what we cover: 1. The difference between critical thinking and limiting beliefs (2:52) 2. How one person’s negative comment created a limiting belief (9:11) 3. Josh's journey with his mom through cancer (13:51) 4. The negative effect of limiting beliefs (19:21) 5. An incisive critique of pharmaceutical ads in the U.S. (21:39) 6. How to balance natural & medical interventions (23:41) 7. The power of reverse-engineering your life based on your vision for the future (34:18) Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Get 40% off your first order of Sundays. Go to SundaysForDogs.com/BESTOFYOU or use code BESTOFYOU at checkout. Go to https://hensonshaving.com/bestofyou and enter BESTOFYOU at checkout to get 100 free blades with your purchase. (Note: you must add both the 100-blade pack and the razor for the discount to apply.) Whether you're exploring distant lands or enjoying a staycation at home, Cozy Earth has your back. Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU. Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Related Episodes: Episode 103: Name, Frame, and Brave Gossip Episode 104: Overcoming the Fear of Vulnerability—Strategies to Stop Feeling Alone and Build Meaningful Connections Episode 105: 4 Lies We Tell, the Mental Health Benefits of Honesty, & How to Stop Lying In Your Relationships Episode 10: What are Limiting Beliefs and How Do I Overcome Them with Mary Marantz Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Are you ever tempted to lie to spare someone’s feelings or avoid conflict? You're not alone. Research shows that most people tell at least one lie every day, even though honesty significantly benefits our relationships and mental health. In today’s episode, we explore the science and Biblical wisdom behind lying, and I'll share practical strategies to foster more honesty (spoiler alert: it involves setting boundaries!) in your relationships. Here's what we cover: How often do we lie? 4 mental health benefits of honesty 4 types of lies we tell The link between lying and boundaries 3 reasons why we lie The most important question to ask yourself about the lies you tell Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Go to https://hensonshaving.com/bestofyou and enter BESTOFYOU at checkout to get 100 free blades with your purchase. (Note: you must add both the 100-blade pack and the razor for the discount to apply.) Sign up for AromaTru's Insider Club today and you'll receive a FREE Waterless Oil Diffuser and a FREE lemon eucalyptus oil - that's over $200 in savings. Head to aromatruorganics.com/bestofyou to take advantage of this exclusive offer. Whether you're exploring distant lands or enjoying a staycation at home, Cozy Earth has your back. Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU. Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Related Episodes: Episode 103: Name, Frame, and Brave Gossip Episode 104: Overcoming the Fear of Vulnerability—Strategies to Stop Feeling Alone and Build Meaningful Connections Episode 20: Making Peace with Yourself (& Facing Your Fear of Disappointing Other People) Episode 72: Overcoming Failure, Handling Adversity, and Telling Yourself the Truth Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Have you ever felt isolated because you can't open up to others? Do you worry that showing vulnerability might lead to more hurt? You are in for such a special treat today. This is such an honest, incredibly real conversation about the risks of vulnerability, the hurts that come from letting others in AND the incredible opportunities for intimacy, connection, and healing when we do. My dear friends, Kathy Tuan-MacLean and Tara Edelschick, authors of the new Bible study experience, "Moms at the Well," surveyed over seven hundred moms and discovered most women struggle with worry, anger, comparison, escapism, a desire for control, and heartbreak. Yet most women feel alone in these struggles. If you've ever felt lonely or skeptical about finding community with other women, this episode is for you. Here's what we cover: * The dissonance we feel about vulnerability (2:21) * How 1 marriage crisis launched a 20 year small group (11:28) * 2 essential ingredients to safeguard trust (16:00) * How they dealt with gossip (21:50) * Strategies for dealing with hurt feelings, ruptures & repair (24:38) * One shocking result from their survey (34:43) * The strategy Alison used to find a friend when lonely (43:35) * The one thing that kills group trust (48:43) For 20% off + free shipping for Moms at the Well, use code IVPPOD20 here Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Get 40% off your first order of Sundays. Go to SundaysForDogs.com/BESTOFYOU or use code BESTOFYOU at checkout. Whether you're exploring distant lands or enjoying a staycation at home, Cozy Earth has your back. Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Related Episodes: Episode 103: Name, Frame, and Brave Gossip Episode 85: The Goal of a Healthy Family & 6 Roles We Take On In Dysfunction Episode 66: The Truth About Anxiety & How to Become a Worry Free Parent with Sissy Goff Episode 65: Vulnerability, Parenting, and Letting Go of Control—Inside A Guy’s Perspective With Our Friends From Dadville Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
We don't want to gossip, but most of us do it. What if gossip actually plays a deeper role in our lives and relationships? So often in life we bump into "grey areas," areas that can stir up dissonance inside of us. We hold certain beliefs or values, yet we find ourselves acting in ways that are contrary to those values. In this series, we're exploring some of these areas that can bring up dissonance inside. Our focus today is gossip. I explore the problems with gossip, as well as some of the surprising research on how it can be constructive. By examining both the positive and negative aspects of gossip, you'll feel empowered to name, frame, and brave a healthier understanding of gossip in your life and relationships. Why gossip is a gray area (3:09) What the Bible says about gossip (6:42) What psychology research says about gossip (12:46) 6 motivations behind gossip (13:43) Constructive vs. destructive forms of gossip (21:40) How to Name, Frame, and Brave gossip in your own life (29:17) Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Go to AquaTru.com and enter code BESTOFYOU at checkout to get 20% OFF any AquaTru purifier! Whether you're exploring distant lands or enjoying a staycation at home, Cozy Earth has your back. Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU. Related Episodes: Episode 102: I Shouldn’t Feel Conflicted About God—How to Name, Frame, and Brave Complicated Emotions About Faith & God Episode 96: Signs of Emotional Immaturity & How to Bring Emotional Health Into Your Relationships Episode 89: When A Relationship Has to Change—How to Tolerate Discomfort, Face an Attachment Void, & Resource Yourself Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Do you ever feel distant from God? Do you struggle with conflicting emotions or unanswered questions that make it hard to feel God's presence in your life? Today's episode brings the 🔥🔥🔥. I'm passionate about naming the false guilt and counterfeit messages that keep us from a vibrant relationship with God. So often we try to shove complicated feelings aside or manipulate ourselves into feeling what we think we “should” feel in our faith. It doesn't work. The good news is that as with any relationship, when you name and frame what you're feeling honestly, you invest in a deeper, more authentic relationship with God. Here’s what we cover… 1. The problem with spiritual bypassing (7:36) 2. 6 counterfeit messages we internalize about God (19:34) 3. 5 framing questions to help you transform those messages (24:23) 4. Specific examples of braving steps you can take in your spiritual life (26:51) 5. My personal experience with spiritual dissonance (31:44) Today's episode is based on an excerpt from Chapter 11 of I Shouldn't Feel This Way, available everywhere books are sold. Find a list of resources from this episode here. Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Head over to WildHealth.com/BESTOFYOU and use code BESTOFYOU at checkout for 20% off! Whether you're exploring distant lands or enjoying a staycation at home, Cozy Earth has your back. Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU. Get 40% off your first order of Sundays. Go to SundaysForDogs.com/BESTOFYOU or use code BESTOFYOU at checkout. Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Related Episodes: Bonus Episode: Aundi Kolber & Dr. Alison on Writing & Launching Books Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Happy Book Launch day! Today I Shouldn't Feel This Way is out in the world AND it's the two-year anniversary of The Best of You Podcast . To celebrate, I asked my friend, fellow therapist, and author, Aundi Kolber, to join me for a special bonus episode! Join us as we share insights into why we started writing, what we keep private vs. what we share publicly, and how to navigate the publishing industry. Pick up your copy of I Shouldn't Feel This Way today! Get Aundi's Strong Like Water Guided Journey today! Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Whether you're exploring distant lands or enjoying a staycation at home, Cozy Earth has your back. Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
How do you navigate anger in your family? What do you do when a parent who was supposed to love you and keep you safe actually caused you harm? Families evoke such complicated emotions. You might feel angry and then guilty about that anger. You might feel a mixture of love and resentment. Today, we tackle family anger and generational trauma. My guest, Lisa-Jo Baker was a teenager when her mother died, leaving her alone with her father and his fierce temper. When she found herself exhibiting that same temper with her own son, she knew it was time to dig deeper. Her new memoir, It Wasn't Roaring, It Was Weeping, is a beautifully written, incredibly powerful story of the legacy of anger, violence, and generational trauma—and how one family healed. You do not want to miss this conversation. Here’s what we cover: 1. When a parent is both hero & villain (9:13) 2. The moment Lisa-Jo realized her father’s anger had become hers (15:43) 3. How she began to investigate her past (19:05) 4. A powerful metaphor for the scars of our families (31:31) 5. The risk of discussing your pain with your parents (35:07) 6. Self-righteous anger vs. wise anger (36:30) 7. What Lisa-Jo confronted about racism as a South African and an American (39:14) 8. Biblical wisdom for healing (51:41) Order It Wasn't Roaring It Was Weeping here Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Thanks to our sponsors: Go to www.organifi.com/bestofyou today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Go to AquaTru.com and enter code BESTOFYOU at checkout to get 20% OFF any AquaTru purifier! Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Whether you're exploring distant lands or enjoying a staycation at home, Cozy Earth has your back. Visit cozyearth.com and unlock an exclusive 35% off with code BESTOFYOU. Related Episodes: Episode 97: I Shouldn't Feel This Anxious—Insights on Trauma & Healing with Monique Koven Episode 98: I Shouldn’t Feel Alone in My Grief—Why Your Grief Matters & the #1 Most Important Support For Those Who Are Grieving Episode 99: I Shouldn’t Feel Like My Spirit is Broken—Exploring a Broken Spirit & the Dark Night of the Soul with Christopher Cook Episode 100: I Shouldn’t Feel Betrayed By Someone I Trust—How to Grieve, Breathe, & Receive in the Wake of Broken Trust with Steve Carter Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Have you ever felt betrayed by someone you thought you could trust? It's a deeply painful experience that can leave you questioning not only the betrayer but also your own judgment. Trust, once broken, seems almost impossible to rebuild. My guest today, Steve Carter, experienced a series of profound betrayals at a pivotal moment in his life. In 2018, amidst misconduct allegations against Bill Hybels, founder of Willow Creek Community Church, Steve made the difficult decision to step down from his role as a newly minted lead pastor—a position he once considered his dream job. Shortly thereafter, he faced yet another personal betrayal by his own parents. Reeling from the loss of his job, his dream, and his trust in those closest to him, Steve entered a desert season guided by three words he sensed God gave to him: Grieve. Breathe. Receive. Steve's journey through loss is so powerful, so honest, and so deeply healing. Please do not miss this conversation! Here’s what we cover: 2 essential ingredients for trust (12:40) Why grief is the antidote to cynicism (22:28) Confronting our attraction to patterns of narcissism (28:08) The anger high vs. the peace of forgiveness (36:25) How he hangs on to his love for the church (34:03) Purchase Grieve, Breathe, Receive by Steve Carter here. Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Thanks to our sponsors: Go to ⁠www.organifi.com/bestofyou⁠ today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Head to factormeals.com/bestofyou50 and use code bestofyou50 to get 50% off! This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Make the switch and build a starter kit. 15% off AND free shipping when you buy a Notes starter kit at notescandle.com/bestofyou. Related Episodes: Episode 97: I Shouldn't Feel This Anxious—Insights on Trauma & Healing with Monique Koven Episode 98: I Shouldn’t Feel Alone in My Grief—Why Your Grief Matters & the #1 Most Important Support For Those Who Are Grieving with J.S. Park Episode 99: I Shouldn’t Feel Like My Spirit is Broken—Exploring a Broken Spirit & the Dark Night of the Soul with Christopher Cook Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Do you ever feel like your spirit is broken? Do you feel like you can't put yourself back together despite your best efforts? Please do not miss this episode. My guest, Christopher Cook, has such powerful words about a broken spirit and how it’s different from (but related to) depression and burnout. We also dig into a real time discussion of the dark night of the soul. This conversation connected so many dots for me, and I cannot wait for you to hear it. Here’s what we cover: 1. The painful circumstances that nearly broke Christopher's spirit (7:00) 2. Recovering from survival mode (12:59) 3. What is a broken spirit? (15:32) 4. Chris’s experience of a dark night of the soul (25:07) 5. The true meaning of surrender (30:46) 6. How to support someone going through a dark night of the soul (41:12) Check out Healing What You Can't Erase by Christopher Cook Find a list of resources from this episode here. Thanks to our sponsors: Go to ⁠www.organifi.com/bestofyou⁠ today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Get 40% off your first order of Sundays. Go to SundaysForDogs.com/BESTOFYOU or use code BESTOFYOU at checkout. Head to factormeals.com/bestofyou50 and use code bestofyou50 to get 50% off! Go to AquaTru.com and enter code BESTOFYOU at checkout to get 20% OFF any AquaTru purifier! Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Make the switch and build a starter kit. 15% off AND free shipping when you buy a Notes starter kit at notescandle.com/bestofyou. Related Episodes: Episode 77: The Dark Night of the Soul—Why It Happens & What It Means Episode 71: All About Therapy—Do I Need a Therapist, How Do I Find One, and What Type of Therapy Works Best? Episode 97: I Shouldn't Feel This Anxious—Insights on Trauma & Healing with Monique Koven Episode 98: I Shouldn’t Feel Alone in My Grief—Why Your Grief Matters & the #1 Most Important Support For Those Who Are Grieving Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
What do you do when you're grieving? How do you support others through grief? Grief shows up in all of our lives—whether you’re grieving the loss of a person, a relationship, or a dream. We need each other to grieve well. It’s not something we were designed to do in isolation. My guest today, hospital chaplain, J.S. Park, is a powerful story teller and grief catcher. His viral posts about grief and death have revealed an incredibly important need. So many of us long to give voice to our grief in a culture that often rushes to push it aside. If you're feeling grief, or if you love someone who's grieving, please do not miss this episode. Here’s what we cover:  1. Why parts of us fear grief (5:20) 2. Why naming grief is so important (9:50) 3. How sitting with loss impacted Joon's faith (23:56) 4. The prayer Joon says before walking into a room (26:20) 5. The #1 thing you can do for someone after a loss (30:56) 6. How to set grief boundaries (36:40) 7. How to support someone who is grieving & what *not* to do (41:07) 8. The one word Joon wants for all of us (48:46) Order Joon's new book here. Find a list of resources from this episode here. Thanks to our sponsors: Go to ⁠www.organifi.com/bestofyou⁠ today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Make the switch and build a starter kit. 15% off AND free shipping when you buy a Notes starter kit at notescandle.com/bestofyou. Right now LMNT is offering a free sample pack with any purchase. The LMNT Sample Pack includes 1 packet of every flavor. This is the perfect offer for anyone interested in trying all of our flavors or who wants to introduce a friend to LMNT. Get yours at DrinkLMNT.com/BestofYou. Related Episodes: Episode 97: I Shouldn't Feel This Anxious—Insights on Trauma & Healing with Monique Koven Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Today’s episode is just so special and so deeply personal. If you’ve experienced trauma, please listen. If you love someone, please listen. Trauma touches so many lives, and it’s so often misunderstood. In today’s episode, Monique Koven, host of The Healing Trauma podcast, shares her powerful story of healing from trauma. There is absolute gold in this episode for everyone. Here’s what we cover: 1. The anxiety response she couldn't "logic" herself out of (8:50) 2. How misdiagnosis caused further harm (10:39) 3. The role of anger in her healing (21:21) 4. Exactly how she began to heal the anxiety response she experienced (32:03) 5. Separating God out from hurtful church messages (24:15) 6. How Ann Voskamp’s work showed her an example of glimmers (34:36) 7. Monique’s profound word for you if you’ve experienced trauma (38:13) Find a list of resources from this episode here. Want to receive free bonus content? ⁠⁠Sign up for my free weekly email here. Thanks to our sponsors: Go to ⁠www.organifi.com/bestofyou⁠ today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Go to AquaTru.com and enter code BESTOFYOU at checkout to get 20% OFF any AquaTru purifier! Get 40% off your first order of Sundays. Go to SundaysForDogs.com/BESTOFYOU or use code BESTOFYOU at checkout. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Make the switch and build a starter kit. 15% off AND free shipping when you buy a Notes starter kit at notescandle.com/bestofyou. Related Episodes: Episode 79: Surviving Trauma & A Path to Forgiveness—Finding God In the Hardest Parts of Your Story With Esau McCaulley Episode 15: C-PTSD—The Pain of A Million Paper Cuts Episode 4: What Do I Need To Know About Trauma? Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Do you walk on eggshells with someone you love? Do you sometimes feel like you can't have an honest conversation? Signs of emotional immaturity are everywhere. In today’s episode, we dive into the signs of emotional immaturity and its profound effect on our relationships. You'll learn the difference between emotionally mature and immature responses so that you can improve your connections. Here’s what we cover: 1. Why emotional immaturity is so prevalent & how it showed up in me! (6:15) 2. Examples of mature vs. immature emotional responses (10:43) 3. The difference between emotional immaturity and narcissism (21:44) 4. The role of enmeshment in emotional immaturity (29:41) 5. Tips for how to navigate a relationship with an emotionally immature person (35:33) 6. Tips for growing in emotional maturity (37:42) Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Do you have questions for Dr. Alison?⁠ Leave them here. Want to receive free bonus content? ⁠⁠Sign up for my free weekly email here. Thanks to our sponsors: Go to ⁠www.organifi.com/bestofyou⁠ today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Go to goodranchers.com, pick your box, use my code BESTOFYOU, and enjoy $189 of free chicken in 2024 PLUS $20 off your first order. Head to factormeals.com/bestofyou50 and use code bestofyou50 to get 50% off! Right now LMNT is offering a free sample pack with any purchase. The LMNT Sample Pack includes 1 packet of every flavor. This is the perfect offer for anyone interested in trying all of our flavors or who wants to introduce a friend to LMNT. Get yours at DrinkLMNT.com/BestofYou. Head over to WildHealth.com/BESTOFYOU and use code BESTOFYOU at checkout for 20% off! Related Episodes: Episode 1: What Is Narcissism Really? Episode 94: Should I Stay or Should I Walk Away? How to Discern When It’s Time to Leave with Emily P. Freeman Episode 95: 4 Toxic Behaviors You Need to Recognize & the #1 Way to Protect Yourself Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
If you’re human, you’ve encountered some toxic behaviors. We all have. And it’s not wise to be naive about them. I’m passionate about helping you identify these toxic behaviors—not to label people, but to name behaviors accurately. When you understand the nature of toxic strategies, you can protect yourself and move toward health. Here’s what you’ll learn: 1. A mistake vs. a pattern of toxic behaviors (4:59) 2. The root of toxic behaviors (15:14) 3. Examples of healthy communication vs. manipulation (16:40) 4. Identifying guilt-driven love (22:03) 5. The difference between constructive feedback & criticism (25:48) 6. Examples of triangulation (31:32) 7. The #1 antidote against toxic behaviors (36:17) 8. Examples of word & action boundaries (39:04) Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Do you have questions for Dr. Alison?⁠ Leave them here. Want to receive free bonus content? ⁠⁠Sign up for my free weekly email here. Thanks to our sponsors: Go to ⁠www.organifi.com/bestofyou⁠ today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Listen & subscribe to https://tinyurl.com/HeartOfDatingPodcast! Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Get 40% off your first order of Sundays. Go to SundaysForDogs.com/BESTOFYOU or use code BESTOFYOU at checkout. Make the switch and build a starter kit. 15% off AND free shipping when you buy a Notes starter kit at notescandle.com/bestofyou. Related Episodes: Episode 94: Should I Stay or Should I Walk Away? How to Discern When It’s Time to Leave with Emily P. Freeman Episode 1: What Is Narcissism Really? Episode 24: Boundaries, the Spectrum of Toxicity, and a Note About Evil Episode 26: Types of “No” Part 2—How to Say “No” to Toxicity Boundaries and the Bible Youtube Playlist Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
How do you decide when it’s time to leave a place or a relationship behind? We have to make decisions all the time. Yet most of us struggle with it. It’s hard to leave something (or someone) behind. It’s also hard to give ourselves the time that we need to wrestle with the decision. When you don’t have a process, you might be tempted to avoid decision-making. Or you might rush too quickly into a decision that isn’t quite right. That’s why I’m thrilled to have this conversation with Emily P. Freeman this week. It’s such a rich conversation about how to discern when it’s time to walk away and what to do when it's time to enter into a new space. Here’s what we cover: 1. The truth about tiny red flags (11:29) 2. 4 crucial questions to ask yourself (13:40) 3. What to do with those 51/49 decisions (20:13) 4. Readiness vs. timeliness in decision making (21:30) 5. Emily’s decision process for leaving a church (25:26) 6. How to walk into a new space (33:28) 7. A life-changing 2 word mantra for decision making (38:34) Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Want to receive free bonus content? ⁠⁠Sign up for my free weekly email here. Thanks to our sponsors: Go to ⁠www.organifi.com/bestofyou⁠ today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Right now LMNT is offering a free sample pack with any purchase. The LMNT Sample Pack includes 1 packet of every flavor. This is the perfect offer for anyone interested in trying all of our flavors or who wants to introduce a friend to LMNT. Get yours at DrinkLMNT.com/BestofYou. Go to goodranchers.com, pick your box, use my code BESTOFYOU, and enjoy $189 of free chicken in 2024 PLUS $20 off your first order. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Make the switch and build a starter kit. 15% off AND free shipping when you buy a Notes starter kit at notescandle.com/bestofyou. Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Related Episodes: Episode 93: 3 Ways to Stop Guilt-Tripping Yourself, Untangle Complicated Emotions, & Discover the Joy of Clarity Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Emotions are complicated. They're also beautiful. When you don't honor the complicated mix of fears, frustrations, and also the good things that you feel, you doubt yourself and you doubt other people. You deprive yourself of the opportunity to get real wisdom and to brave healthier solutions. Today we're diving into these complicated feelings together. Here's what we cover: 1. Why emotional complexity is a gift 2. Examples of how we guilt-trip & gaslight ourselves 3. How to locate emotions within a larger story 4. Real-life examples 5. The 3 most important guideposts to get started Preorder I Shouldn't Feel This Way Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Thanks to our sponsors: Go to ⁠www.organifi.com/bestofyou⁠ today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Ritual’s Essential for Women 18+ is a multivitamin you can actually trust. Get 40% off your first month for a limited time at ritual.com/BESTOFYOU. Get 40% off your first order of Sundays. Go to SundaysForDogs.com/BESTOFYOU or use code BESTOFYOU at checkout. Go to AquaTru.com and enter code BESTOFYOU at checkout to get 20% OFF any AquaTru purifier! Make the switch and build a starter kit. 15% off AND free shipping when you buy a Notes starter kit at notescandle.com/bestofyou. Get 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Related Episodes: Episode 92: How to Honor Loss & Why It Matters With Rachel Marie Kang Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
We experience big and little losses all the time. A friend moves away. An opportunity passes you by. A relationship ends. Learning how to recognize and honor the losses we all experience can become a beautiful part of life, leading to more kindness, self-compassion, and connection. But we don't often talk about our losses, let alone how to honor them. That's why I loved this conversation with Rachel Marie Kang about creating space to honor loss. She is the author of the brand new book, The Matter of Little Losses, a beautiful journey through how to honor the big and little losses in your life. Here's what we cover: 1. The difference between loss and grief (2:09) 2. Different types of loss (7:22) 3. How we process loss as children (14:23) 4. Examples of “little” losses (22:46) 5. The most important way to parent kids through losses (31:04) 6. Rachel’s 3 steps for tending losses each day (35:25) 7. The thing we want most to help us through loss (39:59) 8. Why honoring loss brings hope (47:25) Get The Matter of Little Losses here. Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Do you have questions for Dr. Alison?⁠ Leave them here. Want to receive free bonus content? ⁠⁠Sign up for my free weekly email here. Thanks to our sponsors: Go to ⁠www.organifi.com/bestofyou⁠ today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Head to factormeals.com/bestofyou50 and use code bestofyou50 to get 50% off! Make the switch and build a starter kit. 15% off AND free shipping when you buy a Notes starter kit at notescandle.com/bestofyou. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Get 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Related Episodes: Episode 90: Parenting Through Transitions—How Their Challenges Catalyze Your Growth Episode 42: How to Honor Sadness, Set Boundaries with Loneliness, and What to Do When You Don’t Have Time for this Work Episode 76: When Self-Help Isn’t Enough—Finding the Faith & Strength to Move Forward after Loss & Heartache With Granger Smith Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Do you doubt yourself? Struggle to respect your own worth? Self-worth is foundational to both our psychological and our spiritual health, and today's episode is all about how to develop it. My guest, Jamie Kern Lima, is an entrepreneur, philanthropist, New York Times bestselling author, and founder of IT Cosmetics, a company she started in her living room and grew to the largest luxury makeup brand in the country. If you've ever struggled with self-doubt, this episode is for you. Here’s what we cover: 1. The 4 benefits of self-worth 2. The difference between self-worth and self-confidence 3. The moment Jamie realized she was believing a lie 4. Who are you really doubting? 5. The prayer Jamie prayed to combat God-doubt 6. Research on negative self-talk 7. How to reframe rejection Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Want to receive free bonus content? ⁠⁠Sign up for my free weekly email here. Thanks to our sponsors: Go to ⁠www.organifi.com/bestofyou⁠ today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Get 40% off your first order of Sundays. Go to SundaysForDogs.com/BESTOFYOU or use code BESTOFYOU at checkout. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Get 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Go to thrivemarket.com/bestofyou for 30% off your first order, plus a FREE $60 gift! Make the switch and build a starter kit. 15% off AND free shipping when you buy a Notes starter kit at notescandle.com/bestofyou. Music by Andy Luiten. Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Navigating transitions with your children is a deep dive into raw emotions, facing conflict, and your own unhealed wounds. These transitions aren't easy. The stakes feel so high! But when you face them with courage, compassion and curiosity, you'll find your way through the wilderness and onto a beautiful path. As you do your own work, you'll be an even stronger anchor for your kids! Rowena Day is back to discuss: 1. How parenting changes our neural pathways (9:25) 2. Learning to set limits (12:17) 3. Parenting differently than how you were parented (22:10) 4. Growth vs. fixed mindset (29:29) 5. A better way to praise your kids (30:29) 6. The problem with peer attachments (36:40) 7. The ultimate goal of all this parenting work (45:47) Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Do you have questions for Dr. Alison?⁠ Leave them here. Want to receive free bonus content? ⁠⁠Sign up for my free weekly email here. Thanks to our sponsors: Go to ⁠www.organifi.com/bestofyou⁠ today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Head over to WildHealth.com/BESTOFYOU and use code BESTOFYOU at checkout for 20% off! Head to airdoctorpro.com and use promo code BESTOFYOU to receive UP TO 39%! Go to goodranchers.com, pick your box, use my code BESTOFYOU, and enjoy $189 of free chicken in 2024 PLUS $20 off your first order. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Related Episodes: Episode 69: Your Future Self—8 Challenges to Resolve As You Become the Person You Were Meant to Be Episode 89: When A Relationship Has to Change—How to Tolerate Discomfort, Face an Attachment Void, & Resource Yourself Episode 88: Navigating Transitions—What to Do When Change Stirs up Anxiety, Uncertainty, or Confusion Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
We need attachments to other people, places, and to God. Yet transitions have a way of shaking up those attachments—even healthy ones! Today we’re talking all about how to balance our need to hold on to others - and also the need to let go. It takes skill and self-compassion to navigate these seasons of wrestling for more health, more connection, or more freedom. Here’s what we cover: 1. Healthy & unhealthy attachments (9:34) 2. The 2 competing relationship needs everyone has (21:45) 3. Attachment voids (28:12) 4. Practices to anchor yourself (33:50) 5. The role of liminal figures (40:08) Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here. Do you have questions for Dr. Alison?⁠ Leave them here. Want to receive free bonus content? ⁠⁠Sign up for my free weekly email here. Thanks to our sponsors: Go to ⁠www.organifi.com/bestofyou⁠ today and use code BESTOFYOU for 20% off your order today. Go to AquaTru.com and enter code BESTOFYOU at checkout to get 20% OFF any AquaTru purifier! Ritual’s Essential for Women 18+ is a multivitamin you can actually trust. Get 40% off your first month for a limited time at ritual.com/BESTOFYOU. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp, Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self. Get 35% off your first order of Sundays. Go to SundaysForDogs.com/BESTOFYOU or use code BESTOFYOU at checkout. Related Episodes: Episode 16: What are Attachment Styles and Why Does it Matter? Episode 88: Navigating Transitions—What to Do When Change Stirs up Anxiety, Uncertainty, or Confusion Other episodes with Rowena Day: Episode 44: Why Anger is a Surprising Friend, What Happens When You Avoid It, and How to Create Space for Healthy Expression of Anger in Your Family Episode 63: Spiritual Direction, the Power of Listening, & How to Attune to Yourself and to Others Episode 31: Peace-Keeping, Anger Avoidance, and How to Start Using Your Voice Music by Andy Luiten Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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Comments (3)

gillespiejan

Every time I listen to an episode, I come away with new thoughts and approaches, and I feel more confident in the choices I've made with difficult people.

May 31st
Reply

gillespiejan

Thank you for this very clarifying podcast. It answered many questions for me about my family member who show narcissistic traits.

May 30th
Reply

Kristine Amundrud

So so good! I need to listen again and take notes! Thank you for your teaching!

May 10th
Reply