The Cinderella Mindset

How do we put our phone on silent mode..? We should silence the noise and wait for God's perfect timing...   In waiting for God we acknowledge Him and become dependent and submissive to Him. We realize in those moments that God is our ONLY ONLY source..not google….not siri,… not alexa…or any app The timing is with Him only HE IS SOVEREIGN…when we wait we get to find him and see Him...what a gift that is. We also become dependent on Him..we want to be independent…we want to be the architect or creator of our breakthrough…waiting is considered lazy …right and impractical (source sovereignty…dependence- waiting on God creates stability) but witnessing and experiencing God's purpose and timing will refine us.   Waiting for God develops composure, poise…GOD is waiting for us Isaiah 30:18… God is waiting on US…and He is waiting to shine His face on us and be gracious onto us… Waiting for God is a part of the process that makes us mature..James 1 – 2 …testing of your faith bring perseverance… There is always a PROCESS and it isn't always comfortable or easy.….the way we become complete is to go through the process…we develop perseverance and maturity…HOLDING ON, not giving up, having grit in the process. In that, we find true fulfillment and growth.   Waiting for God puts us in a place of meditation and rest Ps 37:7-9 ..those who wait for the Lord give us peace – move into a place o meekness and humility by depending on Him…the process is so importat   Turn back your from your fear of discomfort and pain...heavy pressure and fire often creates beauty.   Are you willing to wait...or are you refreshing your apps and looking to an idol to answer your needs? Wait for it...you will find it..

Grandma Ella took my hand into her white gloved Sunday 8:30 am service hands and walked me to the same spot in her church every single time. We sat on the left side of the church in the middle.  This was St. Paul's Lutheran Church in Rochelle, Illinois.  From about 1965-1979 I would spend frequent Sunday's with her . I sat with her many times...listening to sermons and my fondest and most consistent memory is the fact that she always gave me the WINTERGREEN LIFE-SAVERS....the white kind... 1988 was the last time I was in St. Paul's Lutheran church in Rochelle, IL. It was my grandmother's funeral. My grandma Ella was a rock to me and a safe haven in so many ways. My mother was a single mother of 4 girls. I was the baby. My grandma was solace, peace and security to me. Her life-saver (so well named) was something I consistently was able to count on with those sunday visits. This week, I took a walk back into the church. It was almost 30 years to the day since I buried grandma. My Mom (grandma's daughter) is in hospice and it was a due diligence visit in anticipation to my mother's funeral.   But there was also the security in knowing that my mother would have her funeral in the same place as Grandma Ella. It was very emotional for me too when I noticed the big banner with Grandma Ella's favorite scripture that she constantly repeated to me "I CAN DO ALL THINGS THROUGH CHRIST WHO STRENGTHENS ME" Ph 4:13.It was the scripture she gave me in a card on the day I left Rockford to move from NYC.  It was the scripture I have clung to and always thought of when I've struggled through life and the one that ALWAYS reminds me of her.. As we left the church we walked out the door and path I walked when I left Grandma's funeral in 1988. I took five steps on that path with my head down and lost my breath when I realized what was in my path ....a single wintergreen life-saver....in the middle of our path ...NO other mint, candy, garbage on the path.... Sometimes heaven meets earth...grandma Ella always the encourager...reaching her hand out to her grand daughters to hand them a life-saver from Heaven, reminding us that GOD does guide our steps. This was a super natural miracle orchestrated by the HOLY SPIRIT and it was POWERFUL.  My little girl heart was once again filled with the belief that I am strong enough the do anything and everything through Him...even saying goodbye one day to my sweet beautiful mother...HUMBLED...by it all... But comforted in seeing the little white life-saver from heaven there to remind me that I am not alone.   Deanna Falchook is a marketplace minister. Mom of 8 kids (5 adopted internationally) and leader of a team of families in Network Marketing who run a business partnering with missionaries, pastors, adoptive families, people of faith by helping them set up a self-sustaining virtual online health and wellness franchises. She is passionate about what she does. seeing it as honoring scriptural truths in bringing the nutritional elements of the earth to people looking for an upgrade in their health. Offering them foods loaded with natural nutrients to build their bodies helps to sustain the BODY of kingdom builders on the mission field as well as families.

I am a passionate Spirit-Filled Marketplace Minister. I love Jesus. I’m the type of Christian that speaks in tongues, often stops people to give them a ‘word’ and sees angels (no judgment please). There is a huge movement of Spirit-Filled Christians ( unique marketplace ministers) entering the industry of Network Marketing. In Network Marketing, we are trained to be efficient business builders and follow lots of very well constructed plans, challenges and systems (90 day, 30 day, pushes, blitzes, plans and challenges).   I have spent the past five years trying my best to be a better network marketer and am leading a team of thousands of unique entrepreneurs filled and moved by the Spirit. I have come to the conclusion that Holy Spirit-Led Marketplace Ministers are just different.   We have a different style, are led by a different ‘invisible’ leader and prioritize the timing and structure of (as Drake would call it) “GOD’S PLANs” over man’s. And while we respect, love and try our best to follow the official business PLAN, God often has other instructions.   To be even more specific, God does love efficiency and order. He created order. Many Christians in business and in their churches are extremely structured and follow RULES to a tee. But more and more Apostolic, Prophetic, Holy Spirit driven Christians are moving in their businesses hearing from God and often their days and moments are directed outside of their day planners. Our way of building a business can literally look like a hot mess to those looking in from the outside.   If you are (or are leading) a Spirit-Filled Marketplace Minister keep in mind that it may be time to embrace the fact that the Holy Spirit may be building your business in line with HIS timing and plans. This often looks messy, chaotic and rife with interruptions. Don’t be jaded into thinking these Spirit-Filled business leaders aren’t highly successful. The breath of God can breathe supernatural momentum into these businesses without human explanation. I have seen many inexplicable massive business growth emerge from this “messy marketplace ministry” style of business building.   In my effort to try to be more ‘efficient’ with my observation even with this article, I’ve laid out   12 Reasons Spirit-Filled Marketplace Ministers Look Like Hot Messes:   Three-Way Calls turn into Witnessing: Mary was on the call with me. Her prospect was struggling deeply and started to mention how she used to go to church and just felt lost. She started crying. I had been talking to her about the benefits of intermittent fasting and an awesome cleansing product we have with aloe-vera. I had to stop that conversation and move into ministry. The conversation ended up with her hearing my testimony and recommitting herself to Jesus. Most business training tells you to keep your calls to a short time but this was a 45-minute call ending up with Mary’s prospect ordering a full nutritional system and also receiving Jesus. I’ve also been in calls intended to talk business that moved into full testimonies that witnessed to the caller and never ended up with a sale. They Don’t Follow Directions and Take Detours: So I was on my way to the important corporate event . We stopped to pick up some sharpies (for nametags) from the drug store and noticed a woman in aisle three sobbing. I spent the next ½ hour consoling her and praying with her. We showed up late to the event noticing the name -tags filled out in crayon. Marketplace Ministry is Stinky: My friend just got off the plane from Guatemala. She had been living there to build family homes for women trafficked and for children who were orphaned. She had won an incentive trip to Rome through the business she was building from her laptop in Guatemala. But smelled like the slums and dumps that she worked in. For those of you who are offended, she had a great sense of humor. She had won an all expense paid trip to a 5 star hotel in Rome ...

In every institution, whether it is a corporation, school, or family, there is always that person who seems to stir the pot or color outside of the lines. True entrepreneurs often look off-balanced to the rest of the world. We are often considered 'trouble makers' who question rules/systems/protocol but we are often the very ones who can change the world for the better with our crazy ideas. I must admit, I have always been inquisitive and crazy.  As a teen, I was a fast pitch softball pitcher without the windmill that everyone wanted to evaluate and emulate. I didn't wind my arm around. I was just fast from the hip. At first, referees were wondering if my pitching style qualified as 'legal' and had to refer to the play book to give approval.   When all of my friends had headed off to college, I opted to pound the pavement and move to NYC.  I had dreams of singing and ended up leading a very popular orchestra in NYC.  I started by singing on the street and ended up at the top of the Rainbow Room. People told me I was crazy.    I am now in another industry that I love...network marketing. And many friends think I'm crazy. Recently,  I have become more and more aware of identifying the CRAZY ONES like myself in Network Marketing.   Sometimes, they try to pretend that they are 'normal' and continue to do their best to follow the rules and play nice.  The "crazy ones' are the ones I look for as business partners. They are wired in such a way that won't allow them to operate quietly inside of illogical or logical systems. So what happens then when they head into Network Marketing? Are Network Marketing companies valuing the 'crazy ones' within their organizations who have powerful ideas that push against the old system? Are the companies limiting genius potential to take their organizations to 'next level' operations by applying their ideas or are they silencing input from the 'crazy ones' and afraid of evaluating and transforming? My observation is that not all Network Marketers are actually entrepreneurs.  Many are corporate drop outs that want to work from home but still operate best with rules and guidelines. In the industry of network marketing, we have 'crazy' people (the entrepreneurs) mixed in with the people who would NEVER EVER be caught dead using a red crayon to color the sky or blue to color the grass. The beauty of the industry of Network Marketing is that we believe we head into it for the freedom.  There is much talk about financial freedom and time freedom.  But the 'crazy ones' also value 'creative freedom.' In fact, some 'crazy ones' would rather sleep on a dorm floor with squashed nachos like Steve Jobs and still have full creative freedom over sleeping at the RITZ with a full bank account and no freedom. Network Marketing appeals to them because they enjoy using their creativity to sell product and they welcome the ability to be their own boss. As a business woman and mother of 8 kids, I am realizing I am a 'crazy one' myself.  I've also raised my kids to be the same.  And it is a pleasure seeing the craziness come out of them. Because after all, my goal is to leave a generation and legacy behind where my children can leave the world a better place by creating change.  My first 'aha' moment of seeing one of my children in a 'crazy one' situation was with my sweet daughter Sam. This is a picture of my daughter Sam.   She is one of the crazy ones.   At 2 and 3 she had her own fashion sense.  She was always a great story teller.  She was writing by the time she was 5.  We noticed a talent for writing and we were very proud of her because of it. When she entered the third grade she had a teacher who was a bit of a rigid teacher.  At our parent teacher conference we were told that Sam was a subpar writer.   The teacher did not approve of Sam's taking her directions and altering them to suit her writing. Samantha was having a rough time in third grade.

Millennial Bashing is saturating google searches.  You don't have to read far to find out that millennials are being accused of ruining industry after industry.   According to recent research millennials have ruined the following:   Offices - Millennials are simultaneously being accused of ruining office culture and working too hard, thereby destroying the Travel industry because they never go on vacation. Department Stores Handshakes Cars Traditional Marketing Work in General Suits 9-5 Workday College Credit Cards Restaurants Sex Funny Things they are accused of ruining Buffalo Wild Wings Golf Bar Soap Wine Corks Napkins Home Depot Light Yogurt Marmalade Cereal Olympics Baby Names   10 Attributes for a Millennial Friendly Network Marketing Company: If you are a millennial looking to start your own business in Network Marketing make sure the company you are working with encourages a culture where millennials are greatly valued. Millennials place importance on the following value system for their ideal career or business. Purpose    Contribution Freedom Relationships Innovation Mentorship Wealth Empowerment Family First Community Millennials respond to out of the box systems and businesses. They are the 'think differently' generation. They won't respond as well to assignments as they will purpose. Cast the vision! Millennials are looking for motivating and purposeful careers.  They love being involved in organizations that give back and they are even challenging the way people fund raise.   63% work to create the 'desired lifestyle'. They are accused of being the avocado toast generation but they actually are out saving their parents. Companies who are willing to mentor and train their new business builders or employees will do amazing. Millennials are empowered not entitled.  Companies who understand that will benefit from the financial rewards of having this demographic greatly represented within their corporate structure. So,  advertisers don't really know what to do with millennials. They are still perplexed. But what we do know is that millennials are hard working, out-of-the-box thinkers and naturally entrepreneurial people. They value freedom, mentorship and community.  Network Marketing companies who offer community, mentoring, and a way to financial freedom will attract millennials as distributors.  The corporate messaging has to be authentic and organic.  Social media channels like instagram, snapchat, twitter, are best to be utilized for promotion and edifying rather than crushing and misunderstanding millennials.. With all of this being said....wait until Generation Z comes on the scene (which is happening now). If advertisers were confused with millennials. It should be interesting to see how they handle the next generation.   WORK WITH ME       LIST OF THINGS MILLENNIALS HAVE RUINED Marketing to Millennials MLMS and Millennials - The Perfect Pairing If...

Network Marketing is populated by people mostly who have sought out the business model because they consider themselves naturally entrepreneurial.  They come into the industry and make decisions to work on their own terms because they are tired and 'over' the corporate pressure. Most of them love to say they 'fired their bosses'. The only problem is that SOME leaders in Network Marketing actually are more familiar with corporate culture than living the entrepreneurial life  or interacting with entrepreneurs.   So at times we find upline leaders within Network Marketing who have left corporate america and yet haven't left corporate america. If you are following me,  you will catch on. In other words, they have brought with them a corporate sensibility. Oftentimes, they subconsciously will see their downline as their 'employees' that they get to 'boss' around.   So, for those of us who have 'fired our bosses,' and  have entered the industry for freedom as our own bosses, this projection by a strong upline can lead to conflict.  When a successful network marketer isn't really an entrepreneur at all but rather a corporate retiree, they may bring the concept and vision of hierarchy with them into their communication and team culture. This can be a problem.   I have observed several situations in Network Marketing of upline intimidation and fear-based leadership. I must also clarify that most of us have been blessed to not have to deal with that type of dynamic. However, it is important also to discuss and give perspective to a problem that does exist in the industry.     So how can you identify if you are under FEAR-BASED LEADERSHIP: Thank you LIZ RYAN of FORBES MAGAZINE for inspiration behind this blog post.... THE FIVE CHARACTERISTICS OF FEAR BASED LEADERS.    I created a list of 6 points. I wanted to take my inspiration from this article and extrapolate it into the Network Marketing Industry:  YOU WILL LEARN IT THE WAY THEY TEACH IT OR BE CUT OFF: Within NWM there are  systems. The systems are important to follow because they are tried and true. However, within companies, teams create their own systems as well that are not necessarily endorsed by corporate leadership.  Some of these systems that are created by an upline may never be taught in a national corporate training. However, I have seen many up and coming leaders be cut off from their upline because they choose to opt to follow standard practices only or get creative and add apply their own systems.  These new leaders have been cut out of Facebook support pages and been discredited within the team because they 'refused to follow protocol.' Upline leaders who will cut people off from not agreeing with the team system (over standard systems) are applying intimidation by excluding these downline distributors from their trainings and support. 2.   THEY EITHER EDIFY OR VILIFY (NOTHING IN BETWEEN): If you are noticing high praise for one person and the demonizing of another you may be under fear-based leadership.  Fear based leaders like to praise people who are highly successful who are 'following the system and team rules,' and demonize the people who aren't.  Liz Ryan says 'you are either a friend or foe.'   There is really no in between.  The people in between are at times ignored and still vilified because they haven't risen to the ranks expected by their upline.  At times, very successful people within a team can be vilified because they aren't in full agreement of the culture of the team. 3. THEY CREATE STORIES ABOUT OTHERS AND SHARE THEM WITH THEIR TEAM (AKA Gossip): Fear-based leaders do not seek clarification through conversations.  Fear-based leaders seek self validation by creating stories that are not based on truth. They rely and believe here-say.   Fear-based leaders often create stories about others without substantiated proof and share them with the team in order to maintain authority and power in order to mi...

Every week I hear stories of abuse from managers and supervisors who have no experience 'managing' and instead opt to lash out on people they were assigned to train.   Corporate abuse is not a new thing. Bullying in the office by bosses is more common than you would think.  However, sometimes the 'bullying' can be accepted as common practice.  Therefore, new employees tend to be given the message to 'toughen up' and not complain. In the meantime, there are serious emotional and physical byproducts that can occur from this abuse. So how do you recognize the difference between abuse and just 'learning the ropes.' And what can you do if you discover that your boss is actually a total jerk and bully? Gary Namie, PhD, director of the Workplace Bullying Institute, says these are the 25 most common tactics adopted by bullies, according to targeted victims: Falsely accusing someone of “errors” not actually made. Staring, glaring, being nonverbally intimidating and clearly showing hostility. Discounting the person’s thoughts or feelings (“oh, that’s silly”) in meetings. Using the “silent treatment” to “ice out” and separate from others. Exhibiting presumably uncontrollable mood swings in front of the group. Making up own rules on the fly that even she/he does not follow. Disregarding satisfactory or exemplary quality of completed work despite evidence. Harshly and constantly criticizing having a different ‘standard’ for the target. Starting, or failing to stop, destructive rumors or gossip about the person. Encouraging people to turn against the person being tormented. Singling out and isolating one person from co-workers, either socially or physically. Publicly displaying “gross,” undignified, but not illegal, behavior. Yelling, screaming, and throwing tantrums in front of others to humiliate a person. Stealing credit for work done by others. Abusing the evaluation process by lying about the person’s performance. Rebelling for failing to follow arbitrary commands. Using confidential information about a person to humiliate privately or publicly. Retaliating against the person after a complaint was filed. Making verbal put-downs/insults based on gender, race, accent or language, disability. Assigning undesirable work as punishment. Making undoable demands– workload, deadlines, duties — for person singled out. Launching a baseless campaign to oust the person. Encouraging the person to quit or transfer rather than to face more mistreatment. Sabotaging the person’s contribution to a team goal and reward. Ensuring failure of person’s project by not performing required tasks: signoffs, taking calls, working with collaborators. In addition, Namie says confronting the boss is “rarely effective and ill-advised.” A few years ago, WBI asked 1,598 individuals who were personally familiar with workplace bullying what strategies they adopted to get their bullying to stop, and whether those actions were effective. Here’s what they said: About 38% of bullied employees essentially did nothing. In other words, he or she let time pass, hoping matters would improve on their own. Effectiveness of doing nothing: 3.25% About 70% of employees directly confronted the perpetrator. Effectiveness of confronting: 3.57% About 71% of bullied employees asked the perpetrator’s boss to intervene and stop it. Effectiveness of seeking support from bully’s boss: 3.26% About 74% told senior management/owner, expecting support.Effectiveness of seeking support from senior management/owners: 3.69% About 60% of those in unions asked their union to intervene and stop it.Effectiveness: 8.84% About 43% of employees filed a formal complaint with HR alleging a policy violation. Effectiveness of telling HR: 4.7% About 19% filed a complaint with an external state or federal agency. Effectiveness of filing a complaint with EEOC, etc.: 11.9%

This most recent season of my life has taught me a lot about true leadership. I am so aware that real leadership has nothing to do with money or rank. Leadership is about rising up to accomplish your personal goals while inspiring and serving others in a capacity that will support them to reach their goals as well.   I am blessed to be a Top Leader in the massively growing industry of Network Marketing.  The particular company I work for is thriving. Still in the 4 years of building my Network Marketing business, I have made some observations on the difference between leading and following. First off, we are all leaders because we are individual business owners who have taken a leap of faith to build something lasting.  However,  the culture and structure in many Network Marketing companies is such that those in high rank and income of course are edified and revered.  While I think that is totally justifiable, money and rank does not always make someone a leader worth following. There are some amazing leaders that we can all learn from.  But I have also witnessed so many people that are new to network marketing stuck in a paralysis and continuing  "sheep-like" mentality that is perpetuating lack of success and their rising into their full potential.   It is important to understand that when you enter into Network Marketing and open up your distributor account, that you are a boss man a boss lady in your own right.  LEAD! TAKE CHARGE...Learn the basics. Apply the systems.  Honor people worthy of respect.  But do not deny the fact that the only way this business will grow will be with you taking charge and LEADING....   I've outlined some traits and distinctions between leaders and followers: 1.DO YOU LOVE TEACHNG OTHERS TO GROW!  Are you a servant leader? Do you love helping to guide others in a healthy way while not enabling them? Great leaders motivate and inspire others to be the best versions of themselves. 2. ARE YOU COACHABLE?  Great leaders are always willing to be coached and taught.  Followers should also be willing to learn and apply principles.  Leaders also rise up to teach. 3. DO YOU LOVE PEOPLE?  Are you in the business because you love interacting with people or are you in mainly for the money.  True leaders in Network Marketing are genuinely attracted to the industry because they love serving others and watching people they partner with rise in leadership as well. 4.  Are you hyper focused on titles and rank? If recognition is your main reason for pursuing your business think again.  There are many people being recognized who are not exhibiting true leadership or taking action.  Pursue growth in the business in spite of the recognition. 5. Do you have a deep internal mindset that motivates you to grow? Stay positive above all.   Leaders know how to push through disappointment and persevere in spite of pitfalls.  Leaders take control of their bad days and turn them into something amazing. 6. Are you willing to admit your mistakes?  Excellent Leaders are willing to admit their mistakes and learn from others. 7. Do You Take Action?  Leaders take action first.  Followers wait for others to take action and then follow.  Assert     yourself .  TACKLE YOUR  goals and crush them. 8. Do You burn the midnight oil? Leaders are willing to work hard and tirelessly to achieve their dreams and goals. 9.  Do you have vision?  Leaders know where they are going and take action to see their vision become reality. 10.   Do you have a plan and blueprint?  Have you spent time being strategic and laying out your goals.  Leaders map out the plan and share it with their army and execute it.   At the end of the day,  your success is yours. Rise up and lead yourself to your final goal. DO IT! Take action... Call out the Leader within and don't let ranks or corporate structures trip you out. You are your own boss...so lead yourself into victory.

When I said 'Yes' to starting a Network Marketing Business I had very little confidence that I would find success.  I had watched a thriving entertainment business of mine tank after the US economy dipped in 2008. I had no experience in Network Marketing and was feeling insecure. Had I engaged in some positive self-talk at the time, I would have reminded myself that I had built a very lucrative New York entertainment company from the ground up with no experience and that I had a track record of success in my life.   The 'failure' really came only after something out of my control. I had also made a decision not to rebuild. But looking back, I had over 10 years of strident growth and momentum in that company. When I was a teen, I brought my softball team to championship as the lead pitcher. I won out a single position to sing at Disney after auditioning with 5000 other hopeful vocalists. I had a laundry list of success in my life. Still, I was beaten down from one recent set-back. How many of you underestimate your ability to become a top leader in your company? How many times do we compare ourselves to others and question our abilities? How often do we minimize our past success and magnify our failures? How often do we think our past success was 'dumb luck' and had nothing to do with who we are or what we are capable of? How often are we frustrated at new recruits into our business or long term product users who have everything it takes to crush this business but just don't believe it?   I love this quote from Tim Ferriss' 4 Hour Work Week “If you are insecure, guess what? The rest of the world is, too. Do not overestimate the competition and underestimate yourself. You are better than you think.” ― Timothy Ferriss, The 4-Hour Workweek   You are better than you think.  You are more capable of maximizing the compensation plan and being recognized as a Top Leader in your company than you think. You have the ability to build a team even when you are feeling beaten down from a recent 'failure' or 'set back'. The big question is: WILL YOU DO EVERYTHING IT TAKES TO CLAIM A POSITION AT THE TOP OF THE COMPANY?   Are you applying the training that leaders are teaching you? Are you strategizing your social media? I became a millionaire in my company.  I literally told my enroller that I didn't know 2 people who would join me.  I have tens of thousands of people in my downline now after 4 years.   A lightbulb went off in my head when I realized that there were people like me (mums like me) who had become very successful in this business simply by making a decision to be coachable and commit time to LEARNING.  In hindsight, I cannot think of another vehicle at the time that had the earning potential that I am experiencing now.  There was not a job or business presented to me that cost around $600-$1000 to start with a full return policy that could bring me to where I am now as a million in income in 3.5 years. How hard are you willing to work to earn a life of freedom?  Remember you are capable of learning and applying yourself to leverage this opportunity.  Remind yourself who you are and make a DECISION to take it all the way..... Here are a few tips to remind yourself that you can succeed in Network Marketing!   Give yourself some credit. - Remind yourself of all of the things you have done right in your life.  Edify yourself. Ask friends why they think you can be a success. Focus on your abilities - Everyone brings unique talents to the table. What are yours?  Build your business in areas and with systems that draw upon your strengths. Be Willing To Be Coached - Show some humility and look to leaders and follow their lead. Take constructive criticism and apply it. Stop comparing- you are unique and special. You will never be exactly like the person you elevate as the IDEAL in your business. You can set a new standard in succeeding by being YOU.

I've had my own business in the Network Marketing industry for 4 years now.  But I will never forget the first time I heard a top network marketer say, "I don't like sales. I hate sales. We don't sell, we share!" Hold the phone! Shut the F%$& up! WHAT the WHAT? I couldn't believe I actually heard this guy say that he hates sales and yet he was a top incomer earner in the company.  In all honesty, I thought it was BS. My mind went on this tangent.  I thought, "if he hates sales so much he should look at the fact that he has earned 4 million dollars SELLING STUFF!" I then spent the next few years hearing people repeat what this guy said.  I also heard other top network marketers refuse to claim the word ...SELL or SALES. I understand why they say they SHARE rather than SELL.  But they don't stop to think of how damaging and ludicrous that is. I love sharing too but at the end of the day if they buy what I'm sharing, it's a sale. What they are trying to say is that they hate the STYLE of the stereotypical sales person in network marketing.  That we don't sell things THAT WAY. Refusing to use the word "sell" and "sales"and telling potential customers, "we hate sales too,"  puts us in the same category as that sleezy guy who stereotypically also SELLS stuff. We hate that guy because he lies to people. He uses choice words to manipulate people to buy his product. But then we go ahead and lie to people and use choice words to convince people to buy our products by lying to them and using the word SHARE instead of SELL because we think they will like the word better. This makes us the equivalent of 'THAT SLEEZY SALES GUY!" I love sales and I love that I get to help people by introducing them to products that I stand by.   I am not that manipulative person. I am not someone who pitches things to people because I'm trying to just meet a quota. I love people. I love the products I sell and use them myself. I share stuff, I love! At the end of the day if my friends buy it, that means I sold it to them.  Thus, I am a sales person. Stop being fake and stop lying to people! YOU SELL STUFF..... We are in the most amazing industry in the world where we get to have freedom with time and money.   We get to work from home.  We get to choose which company and products we want to represent.  We get to be excellent customers with the companies that create products we love. Personally, I am owning the word and refusing to attach negativity to it.  Check out my recent podcast above.  I have a little more to say on the subject.

People who find great success almost always have an un-natural obsession or focus on  reaching their goals. It is a fact that a concentrated focus on producing solid results combined with working smart will help to accelerate your success. So the answer to the question: "Is it necessary to remain laser focused to find success in network marketing?" Would have to be...YES! But... What happens when a network marketer is perceived to be distracted?  What happens when another leader in the company accuses a business builder of being lazy or unprofessional for taking a break or time painting a picture or writing a book? Is extra attention to family a distraction?  Is expressing your art a distraction?  Is a time for reflection and peace a distraction? I have heard criticisms by leaders of fellow distributors who are not 100% 24/7 focused on their tasks in Network Marketing. In fact, I have noticed some people with solid identities prior to entering the industry flounder and dive into a serious identity crisis once they enter the industry and discontinue cultivating their talents outside of NWM.  Some people have been transformed into fully seeing themselves as Network Marketers first and foremost. I worked as a singer prior to Network Marketing. I love to sing.  I have written books. I love to write.  My husband is an amazing musician.   I have people in my team that are athletes, artists and some continue to be employed in different professions while using their work-at-home businesses as a way to earn extra money. While laser sharp focus on your NWM business will produce greater results, the definition of success can vary from person to person. I personally see 'distractions' sometimes as being healthy.  Being a well rounded individual can help to attract a solid and unique team of individuals more equipped to connect with people on the field.   We want to be relatable.  We want to connect with people authentically. So, the next time you hear someone accuse a business builder of 'sleeping on the job' , understand that many people enter the industry to find more time freedom and creative freedom. Laser sharp focus requires a serious and intense commitment and isn't always fun. People build their businesses at difference paces and we have a right to speed up when we want to or slow down. Just be aware that major distractions can and will slow down progress. If you desire to crush your goals, you will need to dig in your heels and fight your way to the top with your eyes fully on the prize. I believe the best Network Marketers are balanced between having a healthy amount of 'distractions' and extra activities outside of their business combined with focused hours working smart inside of their businesses. The beauty of this business though is that a 2 year commitment and laser focus could yield continual residual income streaming in for years. The un-natural obsession may be worth it.  But at the end of the day, you are the person who gets to make that judgement call.

Seriously, I had to make this podcast because I have been getting so frustrated with the confusion in Network Marketing regarding what  a new business builder's relationship is expected to be with their upline. The entire gist of my podcast is that you are the leader so LEAD. Respect your upline if they earn your respect.  But you get to choose who you align yourself with.  It is not a requirement that you FOLLOW your upline blindly. If you are in a company that insists that you do then you might as well get a corporate job and work with a boss over you. If you are coming from a corporate background then you may have the expectation that you have to follow some kind of corporate hierarchy.  Please keep your viewpoint in check. You are not an employee to your upline. IF you are coming into Network Marketing from the vantage point of having been an entrepreneur, you are accustomed to making your own decisions.  You already should know that mentorship and training is essential.  Whether or not that is your upline is up to you. Most people have excellent relationships with their upline. My point with the podcast is to emphasize the importance of a mindset that clearly understand that you are not bound to obey or follow blindly the person in your upline. You get to choose. So if you choose to align with the upline then that is a way to honor them.  But do not buy into the fact that you need to act like an employee. BYOB....BE YOUR OWN BOSS!  Isn't that one of the reasons you entered this industry anyhow...

I wanted to talk about the definition of success and the images of success in NWM. We are TOLD that success means rising to the top ranks of our companies, making the most money and  receiving the most recognition. The acquisition of super expensive cars and large ostentatious homes tends to be the stereorypical backdrop of ads for NWM and success coaches. We live in America where things typically are big .I mean really big.. But does becoming the top earner in a company or the one with the most accolades really epitomize success.   Truly becoming the top income earner does epitomize that in some ways and reaching goals does as well.  So yes, you are successful in earning the most and accomplishing the most IF your definition is all about money, recognition and the acquisition of houses, cars, and expensive vacations. NOW, what if your definition of success is something different. I have been in NWM now for 4 years. I am an industry millionaire and have many awards in my trophy case. I also have watched as my first personally enrolled associate become a millionaire and several people in my team earn over 6 figures. BUT my team which represents tens of thousands of people, I think is more representative of the true success in NWM.  These people have accomplished their goals of paying for mortgages, putting their kids into private school, paying for physical therapy for their kids and adoptions…funding mission trips and paying for college for impoverished people in Uganda and Nicaraugua. The images of mansions and expensive cars do not necessarily capture the visual of what today’s success in Network Marketing looks like. NOW there is nothing wrong with the cars or mansions but they imply that at the heart of NWM are people who value grandiose material acquisitions over simple and deep intangibles and quality connections and experiences. Success can be defined in so many ways but what I have noticed is that the real nwm (not the airbrushed and photoshopped and pretending to own a mansion and TESLA NWM) is someone who wants financial, creative and time freedom over everything. This is not always captured by a photo infront of a home in Beverly Hills. And if we keep playing to the audience of people who we think wants  that…we will be losing out on enrollments and recruiting of the true lifeline of the new and real network marketers….these are people who see through the silk screen and filters of those pictures. Let me tell you a couple of stories to sort of illustrate what I mean. Prior to NWM I had a very successful entertainment company in NYC. I worked hard to build my band up to earning about 30k a gig. My band played weddings for Michael Douglas and Catherine zeta jones, parties for Geraldo rivera, Jimmy Buffett, Donald Trump, Martha Stewart…many more… The costs of these parties was about 500k to 2million per party. People in my industry (caterers, musicians, party planner )would be considered successful financially but not all of them were happy. I made great money but observed an emptiness within me… The money and fancy places did not represent ultimate success to me. I wanted freedom.. I had no freedom. I had to work …there was no residual income. There was no time freedom and often there was no creative freedom.. Now during this time I purchased a huge home….I had the mansion….but when finances slipped and I left the industry of events…we were left with foreclosure and potential bankruptcy …we had no residual income and bought the mansion because it was an OLD dream of ours that we had actually grown out of. When I was first introduced to NWM I didn’t want anything to do with it because of the fast talking, slick faced, expensive watch wearing, in front of a mansion, Tesla driving network marketer. I DIDN”T WANT THAT…I am in awe at how many people still perpetuate this image in ads…gah… The person introducing me to the products I love and the company I love, wasn’t like this guy..