The Connection Code with Rachel and Jeana

What’s the difference between collecting contacts and building real relationships?Award-winning communications executive—and lifelong super-connector—Jon Harris joins us to share what more than three decades of bringing people together has taught him about curiosity, generosity and the relationships that remain long after jobs and titles change.Jon opens up about the difficult childhood that shaped his commitment to helping others, why he believes the best networkers give without keeping score and what he has learned about asking for help during a professional transition of his own. He also introduces us to the Truffle Club, the trusted community of communications leaders he created during the pandemic, and reminds us why we should never let someone’s title stop us from saying hello.Plus, Jeana and Rachel debate the increasingly popular wedding-day Irish goodbye and reflect on Dolly Parton’s legacy of generosity, joy and making the world a little brighter.This episode is sponsored by Eventually. Visit eventuallyticketing.com/the-connection-code and use code CONNECT10 for 10% off your first year.Media:Jon Harris: LinkedIn and Instagram @jonjayharrisDolly Parton’s Imagination Library: Learn about the book-gifting programCoyote vs. Acme: Official movie site and trailerDare to Serve by Cheryl Bachelder hereSocialWorks: Chance the Rapper’s Chicago nonprofit

What does it mean to love a place deeply and know when it’s time to leave?New York Times bestselling author and Pulitzer Prize finalist Xochitl Gonzalez joins Jeana and Rachel for an expansive conversation about the places that make us, the people who remember our earlier selves, and the courage it takes to enter a new chapter.Xochitl reflects on Brooklyn as both a hometown and a living archive. She also talks about writing Last Night in Brooklyn as one final love letter to the place that shaped her. She shares what decades-long friendships have taught her about grace, why closeness doesn’t always require constant contact, and how pre-digital friendship allowed people to become part of a community without feeling watched.She also opens up about beginning her writing career in her 40s after years as a luxury wedding planner, the way class can narrow our sense of what’s possible, and why we should periodically reconsider our own “aperture of opportunity.” Plus, Xochitl talks manifestation, intergenerational mentorship, the connections she still hopes to make, and learning to trust that the road we started on isn’t necessarily the one we have to stay on.Before the interview, Jeana and Rachel share moments when an improbable future felt inevitable. And in Show & Tell, they consider children’s autonomy online and whether we should ask permission before sharing photos of the people we love.Media in this episode:Xochitl Gonzalez’s websiteLast Night in BrooklynOlga Dies DreamingAnita de Monte Laughs LastNeed Blind: A Memoir of Class and Climbing in AmericaXochitl’s SubstackXochitl on InstagramBilly Joel: And So It Goes — the documentary that led Xochitl to a remarkable new connection. “Robby Hoffman Will Always Feel Poor, No Matter How Rich She Gets” — the New York Times interview Rachel references. Eventually Ticketing — use code CONNECT10 for 10% off the first year.

People-pleasing can look like kindness—but is it actually bringing us closer to one another?In this episode, Rachel and Jeana examine how people-pleasing shows up at work, in friendships, in romantic relationships and even in hospitality. Inspired by Adam Grant’s writing on the subject, they explore the fear of disappointing others, why saying no can feel so loaded and how trying to earn someone’s approval can create an “authenticity gap” in the very relationships we’re hoping to strengthen.They also discuss rejection as data, the difference between caring for someone and managing their feelings, and why clear communication may be one of the kindest relationship tools we have. Plus: a simple daily journaling practice, an invitation dilemma involving a Mother’s Day brunch and the question we can ask whenever we feel ourselves slipping into people-pleasing mode: Is this actually bringing me closer to this person—or am I simply trying to avoid discomfort?Media mentioned in this episode:“The Truth About People Pleasing” by Adam Grant — the newsletter that inspired the conversation and includes the Kristen Bell example. "I Got Rejected 101 Times” by Emily Winter — the essay Jeana references about intentionally becoming more comfortable with rejection.“I Got Uninvited From Mother’s Day Brunch Because I’m Not a Mom” from Kramer & Jess — the call-in segment discussed during Show & Tell. Eventually — listeners can use code CONNECT10 for 10% off their first year.The Likability Trap by Alicia MenendezSuzy Welch’s Becoming You

What if the goal of a disagreement wasn’t to win, but to make the next conversation possible?Rachel and Jeana talk with Harvard professor Julia Minson, author of How to Disagree Better, about what happens when we assume we already understand the other person. Julia shares a late-night disagreement with her daughter that went sideways, why curiosity needs to be spoken aloud, and a simple “curiosity sandwich” for expressing your view while staying open to someone else’s.They also explore why personal stories can build trust where facts alone may fall short, and how asking a follow-up question shows someone you’re listening. Whether the disagreement is with a child, a friend, or a colleague, this episode offers ways to stay connected through it.This season of The Connection Code is sponsored by Eventually. Visit ⁠eventuallyticketing.com/the-connection-code⁠ and use code CONNECT10 for 10% off your first year.Other content to dig into:Read Julia's book ⁠How to Disagree Better⁠ Dig into Julia's ⁠workshops and research⁠.⁠The CBS News story about the four-year-old who brought his neighborhood together⁠—Rachel’s show-and-tell.

What happens when kids put down their phones and have the freedom to simply be kids?Rachel and Jeana sit down with Tommy Hoffman, executive director of Herzl Camp, to explore why summer camp remains one of the rare places where young people can practice the art of conversation, navigate conflict, develop independence, and form meaningful friendships through repeated, real-life experiences.Tommy shares how returning to camp after a 30-year career helped him find his “A+” calling—and what he has learned from watching hundreds of campers grow, connect, try new things, and become more confident in who they are. Together, they discuss camp as a sanctuary for childhood, the difference between witnessing connection through a screen and experiencing it for yourself, and the lessons adults can borrow from camp to build richer relationships of their own.Plus, Rachel and Jeana tackle one of the least glamorous—but most important—parts of adult friendship: Who is responsible for making the plans? They talk about the invisible labor of being the group planner, rotating responsibility, creating standing dates, and why we could all use more low-pressure “barefoot plans.”Media within: Herzl CampThe Anxious Generation by Jonathan HaidtEventually Ticketing — with code CONNECT10 for 10% off the first yearCut article about the AI-driven summer camp hereThis Closure Instagram video discussing the weight of being the friend who makes plans!