The Empowered Wife Podcast: Marriage Help with Laura Doyle

I have a confession about the 6 Intimacy Skills™ I’m always talking about. At first, I thought they sounded stupid. I remember thinking, “I am NOT going to do THAAAAT!” I thought they were old-fashioned and just plain yucky. I thought if I apologized for being disrespectful, that would be a step back for all womankind. And that’s NOT how *I* was raised. Or if I expressed my gratitude for something my husband should do anyway, that would turn me into a Stepford Wife robot. Good thing I was so desperate or I probably never would have tried the 6 Intimacy Skills. Once I did, I saw things so differently. Yes, the Skills were counterintuitive but also compelling. I got excited about how I felt when I experimented with them. I didn’t think that was going to happen, but then I actually *tried* them. Which wasn’t easy to do all by my lonesome. Fortunately, there’s now a whole community of like-minded women, and we have something exciting brewing! I’ll tell you all about it on today’s episode of The Empowered Wife Podcast, where I’m talking about the 5-Day Adored Wife Challenge. And the Man Panel continues! My guest Tim is the husband of a podcast guest and relationship coach. I’ll get his perspective on the changes in his family as a result of his wife using the 6 Intimacy Skills and the Connection Framework. Get ready to hear the male perspective on what makes men attracted to their wives and want to be her hero.

If you've ever felt the frustration and loneliness of trying to communicate with a partner who just shuts down, you're not alone. If your man won’t say a word to you or only talks about logistics or the kids, it’s devastating and scary. I remember feeling panicked when that used to happen at my house because I felt so abandoned. The only way to stop the terror, I thought, was to insist that he talk to me, which seemed to make him dig in even more. It was awful and I felt pathetic. Other people said just ignore him until he calms down, but I’m not a patient person and that never worked for me. So on today’s episode of The Empowered Wife Podcast, we’re talking about how to deal with a stonewalling husband. These three tips will help you navigate those stressful moments with more dignity and to create a home where there’s so much emotional safety that stonewalling becomes a distant memory.  Plus, my guest Jessee is not a student but rather the husband of a podcast guest and coach. He generously agreed to be part of our Man Panel series, and today I’m going to get his perspective on the changes in his family as a result of his wife using the 6 Intimacy Skills™ and the Connection Framework. Get ready to hear the male perspective on what makes a man attracted to his wife and want to be her hero.

Having the topic of separation on the table is scary and painful. Even if you’re the one who wants to separate, it means you’ve been suffering and struggling, probably for a long time. That’s no way to live. Which is why separation is on the table to begin with! When you have a headache, you just want it to stop. Likewise, when you’re in a marriage that hurts every day, you just want the pain to stop. Separation promises to give you that relief. Plus, it seems a lot less final than divorce. If, on the other hand, you don’t want to separate, this can be a really terrifying topic. Either way, on today’s episode of The Empowered Wife Podcast, we’re talking about 3 questions to ask before you separate. Plus, my guest Caroline wondered why her husband was so angry. Her marriage felt heavy with the threat of divorce. But as she experimented with the Intimacy Skills she started to feel like a princess. Her husband adores her now and divorce is off the table. She’s going to tell us how she did it so you can do it too!

Everybody has feelings, but as women, we have emotional brilliance. Maybe your feelings are overwhelming or you think that you’re too emotional or too sensitive and you want to figure out a way to not be so easily hurt. But I don’t know of a way to not feel what you feel. Even if I did, I wouldn’t recommend it. I see being sensitive as a gift. Now that I know how to connect with my feelings, they’re not a burden. They are the key ingredient for so many tender and connecting moments in my relationships. They tell me when I’m enjoying myself, when I want to make a change, and how to care for myself. And yes, when I’m hurt, disappointed or lonely. I know what I want because I connect with my feelings. I know myself because I tune into how I feel. And that helps me make myself happy, even if I start out miserable. On today’s episode of The Empowered Wife Podcast, we’re talking about three ways to connect with your feelings. Plus, my guest Theresia’s marriage felt lonely whenever she got her husband’s silent treatment, which sometimes lasted for weeks! He seemed to be getting angrier and angrier. Then she had some insights on how to talk to him. Now, she feels close and playful with her husband, who doesn’t seem so angry anymore. She’s going to tell us how she did it so you can do it too!

Normally, I’m allergic to focusing on what is wrong, but today we’re making an exception. We’ll focus on whether something is wrong because that may be where you are right now, if you’re anything like I was. It’s a nagging, anxious feeling. Is something wrong? You’ve tried asking what’s up, but if he doesn’t offer any explanation or just says he’s stressed or tired, your mind could wander down a dark alley. Maybe your heart is telling you there’s more to marriage than just being roommates, just getting by without laughter, passion and plans for the future. You’re right—there is definitely more to marriage than just existing, without feeling loved, which is depressing and demoralizing. That’s not okay. So on today’s episode of The Empowered Wife Podcast, we’re talking about how to figure out whether something is wrong with your marriage. I’ll share 3 ways to know and what to do about it.  Plus, my guest Heidi’s husband had shut down and moved out. But then she said something that made him soften, which felt like a miracle. Now he tells her he loves her every day and their relationship is better than ever. She’s going to tell us how she did it so you can do it too.

It’s annoying when your husband complains. It sucks the fun out of everything, makes you feel unappreciated, and can definitely lead to resentment (if you’re a mere mortal woman like me). What I’m going to share with you is going to sound counterintuitive. What I’ll invite you to try when your husband complains too much is not a regular power that most women have. No. These are superpowers that some wives have developed for strengthening their families. You can too. On today’s episode of The Empowered Wife Podcast, I’m talking about what to do when your husband complains too much. I'll share 2 ways to change that. Also, my guest Mary felt very alone and scared that her husband would leave or cheat on her, especially when he brought up divorce during a fight! She decided to experiment with the 6 Intimacy Skills, but her husband was skeptical and sometimes it backfired completely. Then he started flirting and seeking her out more, and now the passion has skyrocketed. She’s going to tell us how she did it so you can do it too.

If you’re thinking that your husband doesn’t care about your desires and that’s why he doesn’t get inspired when he hears them, that’s so hurtful and unloving. It's also very lonely, like you’re invisible. That's how I felt when I thought that John didn’t care what I wanted. That’s what a lot of students thought too. But we were wrong. It turns out, we just weren’t expressing desires. We thought we were, but we weren’t. On today’s episode of The Empowered Wife Podcast, I’m talking about four reasons your desires aren't inspiring and how to fix that in a hurry. Plus, my guest Marian couldn’t stop raging at her husband, who told her he wasn’t happy anymore. She discovered this podcast and started implementing the Intimacy Skills, and today he tells her he loves her all the time. She’s going to tell us how she went from depressed and anxious to content and calm so you can do it too!

The bigger question may be: How do you respect your husband when he doesn’t seem to deserve it? That was a tough one for me! Knowing I SHOULD be respectful has never been that motivating to me. I don’t wanna! What if he’s messing up? Shouldn’t I let him know that? That is one option. But being disrespectful feels dirty and hairy. It leaves me with an emotional hangover after I’ve interrupted or dismissed him or run over him like a steamroller. Blech! I don’t like it. I married John because I respected him so much. I can decide to remember why I felt that way. When I do, he responds to me the way he did when he wooed me, tender and romantic, sweet and chivalrous. So on today’s episode of The Empowered Wife Podcast, we’re talking about 3 proven ways to respect your husband. Plus, my guest Valerie was tired of feeling like roommates. But when she started using the Intimacy Skills, her man responded with more smiles, hugs and kisses. Today they enjoy lots of togetherness. She’s going to tell us how she did it so you can do it too!  

It’s so idyllic and nostalgic to think about the past, when marriages lasted. The idea of stay-at-home mothers getting dolled up and making things from scratch is so pretty. I follow a woman on TikTok who bakes bread from scratch and lives in the French countryside with two adorable little boys, which seems so nourishing and wholesome. Fortunately, what made my marriage better was not becoming more domestic, as I seem to have very little domestic inclination. When I was doing the most domestic stuff, my marriage was struggling, so that wasn’t the answer. What is? On today’s episode of The Empowered Wife Podcast, I’m talking about whether trad wives have better marriages and a few things that will strengthen yours. Plus, my guest Sarah was devastated when her defiant, disrespectful teenage daughter moved out and wanted nothing to do with her. Sarah knew about the 6 Intimacy Skills™ from a Laura Doyle coach friend. When she vulnerably reached out to the coach for help, it wasn’t to save her marriage, which had ended already. It was to save her connection to her daughter. Today she’s thankful they have the relationship she always dreamed of. She’s going to tell us how she did it so you can do it too.

I still remember feeling “What a mistake. He’s such a Loser McLosey Pants. What was I thinking?! I could have done so much better. If only I hadn’t done that, I’d be so much happier.” I was suffering. Why try to save your marriage when you don’t even like the guy? It’s very demotivating. You may have good reasons for not liking him. Maybe he’s abusive or neglectful or has abandoned you. He’s caused you a lot of pain. I’m in no position to tell you to just suck it up and start liking him again because I couldn’t do it either. But what I can speak to is how to avoid the embarrassment of divorce and how most of the things I didn’t like about my husband that were causing me to suffer were of my own doing. On today’s episode of The Empowered Wife Podcast, I’m talking about what to do when you don't like your husband and three surprising solutions that will actually make him a lot more appealing. Plus, my guest Kim and her husband were getting divorced. It was decided and she didn’t see that changing. But Kim then her husband called off the divorce and said she is the love of his life. They barely even argue. She’s going to tell us how she did it so you can do it too. 

It's depressing when you long to hear your man tell you how beautiful you are and how crazy he is about you and he just…doesn’t. It’s frustrating if you just want him to fix the screen door, move the patio furniture or put the crib in the attic and he just…won’t. Or if you really love snuggling and want to feel physically desired but that’s not happening, it hurts! So what can you do if he’s just not the type of guy to give you that, and never has been? Tigers don’t change their stripes, right? Or do they? On today’s episode of The Empowered Wife Podcast, I’m talking about what to do when your husband doesn’t speak your love language—and two ways to change that. Plus, my guest Kristi was heartbroken after her husband’s infidelity and him telling her he didn’t love her anymore. Her marriage felt dead! But today they have a deeper connection than ever, and he is always doing things to make her happy. She’s going to tell us how she did it so you can do it too.

When I got married, no one had taught me that there are five gifts of femininity that I get to enjoy as my birthright and that my relationship depends on for success. If no one ever taught you either, here they are. I’ll share how you can start enjoying your superpowers of being a woman! On today’s episode of The Empowered Wife Podcast, I’m talking about the five gifts of femininity, your birthright as a woman.  Plus, my guest Annie and her husband were fighting a lot, and she felt so disrespected. But from the first time she experimented with the 6 Intimacy Skills™, she got a better response. While they still have their ups and downs, now her husband apologizes to her and her marriage is so rewarding. She’s going to tell us how she did it so you can do it too.

It’s so discouraging when your husband is diagnosed with something like ADD, OCD, narcissism, Borderline Personality Disorder, anxiety, depression, PTSD, or Dissociative Disorder. Having hitched your wagon to someone with a disorder or deficit can feel like a life sentence of misery. It’s very distressing. Even if you don’t have a formal diagnosis, maybe you’ve done some reading about what you observe in him and you have strong suspicions. While it’s hard to find this out after you’re married, it’s also intriguing because having a diagnosis holds out the promise that he could improve with some kind of treatment, like medicine or therapy. At least that’s how I felt when my husband got his diagnosis, but it all went wrong from there. So on today’s episode of The Empowered Wife Podcast, I’m talking about what to do instead when your husband’s disorder is ruining your marriage. Plus, my guest Katherine’s husband waited until the kids were teens when he said he wanted to separate, which left her feeling abandoned and scared. But that was then. Today he seeks her out, says she’s beautiful and that he is so lucky to have her as his wife. How did Katherine make such a dramatic change in her marriage? She’s going to tell us so you can do it too.

Especially if physical intimacy has dried up and he’s not interested in you, the rejection hurts and makes you feel pathetic. You’re competing with a two-dimensional woman and losing. It’s only logical that it’s the porn that’s stealing the passion. And you can’t control that. So what are your options? On today’s episode of The Empowered Wife Podcast, I’m talking about what to do when your husband is addicted to porn. I’ll share the #1 way to heal. Plus, my guest Melissa struggled with feeling emotionally abused, and there were lots of fights about money. After she implemented all of the Intimacy Skills step by step, she feels like she’s had a whole-life makeover, including in her marriage, which is safe, peaceful and exciting now. She’s going to tell us how she did it so you can do it too.

It's such a lonely, scary feeling when your man’s affection dries up. Especially if there was a time when he couldn’t keep his hands off of you or he was always stealing kisses and putting his arm around you. I remember being so confused and worried that I wasn’t attractive anymore. I thought it was because I was older and out of shape, but that had nothing to do with it, I found out. I’m even older now, and all that easy loving is back and better than ever—like when we were falling in love. Now I know that I had gotten ugly, but not physically like I thought. On today’s episode of The Empowered Wife Podcast, we’re talking about two ways to deal with a partner who is not affectionate. Plus, my guest Jacquelyn  was so tired of her husband’s porn and substance addictions, him sleeping on the couch and their sexless marriage. Then she made a decision to better herself, which was really hard at first. But today those addictions are no longer an issue, her marriage is amazing, and she feels adored and happier than she’s ever been. She’s going to tell us how she did it so you can do it too!