The Intentional Parents Podcast

We're kicking off a new series called "Stay in Your Cell," and it starts with a question we've both been sitting with: why can't we stay where we are, in the current life we actually have?Before we get there, we share an update on the last eight weeks: Elizabeth's ongoing chronic back pain, and how it's shaping the honesty we're bringing into this conversation. We're in this with you, frustrations and all.The series title comes from a saying attributed to the Desert Mothers and Fathers: “Stay in your cell, and it will teach you everything.” Your cell is your home, your job, your community, the actual life in front of you, not the one you're imagining somewhere else. We talk about the difference between being called away from a place and simply being unable to remain in one, and why our generation in particular struggles to stay: bigger houses, nicer cars, a different kid, a different spouse, or just the quiet pull of a screen that makes escape easier than it's ever been. We're honest that escaping doesn't require leaving. Sometimes it's just a phone in your hand while your actual life waits in the next room, and even if you did leave, the same root discontentment would follow you.We land on four practices for learning to stay: naming your escape fantasy (finishing the sentence "if ________ changed, things would be better"), practicing receiving your actual life, building a rule of life for the season you're really in, and refusing to make big decisions out of temporary restlessness. Grounded in Philippians 4 and Romans 5, this episode is an honest, hope-anchored conversation on contentment, perseverance, and the ordinary life you've been given to actually live.Scripture Mentioned: Philippians 4:11-13 + Romans 5:3-5Books Mentioned: What Grows in Weary Lands by Tish Harrison Warren + Liturgy of the Ordinary by Tish Harrison WarrenPrevious Episode Mentioned: 20 Years From Now: What You'll Wish You Focused On As a Parent (w/ Sally Lemos, MS, LPC) (Spotify, Apple Podcasts + YouTube)Sowing a Hidden Seed: Marriage Edition is currently available as our thank you gift to Legacy Builders, Intentional’s monthly giving community. Learn more at intentionalparents.org/devotional.Intentional Motherhood Retreat: October 15-17, 2026 in Portland, ORIntentional Fatherhood Retreat: November 12-14, 2026 in Austin, TXSubmit Questions: Send a voice recording to [email protected], mentioning your name and where you’re from.Sowing a Hidden Seed: Parenting EditionJoin Our Legacy BuildersWatch on YouTubeFollow Us on Instagram: @intentional_parents @brookmosser@emosserFREE Bottom-Up vs. Top-Down Parenting PDFFREE Text Message Daily DevotionalRaising Passionate Jesus FollowersThe Intentional Film Series

Healthy families keep getting to know each other. We tend to think we already know our family, but people change, and when we stop asking questions, we start assuming intentions instead. Jesus ran into this too: in John 14, he asks Philip, “Don’t you know me...even after I have been among you such a long time?” Even Paul kept pursuing "that I may know him" in Philippians 3, present tense, never finished. If our relationship with Jesus keeps evolving, so does every relationship we're in, and that includes the people at our own table.In this episode, we walk through five conversation starters, mostly for adult kids and their parents, though they work with siblings, friends, or your own teenager too. This is less about family trivia and more about what actually formed the people you love.5 Questions to Ask:Who were you before you were my parent?What happened to you that shaped you more than I realized?What was it actually like to be you in our family?Is there anything between us that makes it harder to be close?Who are you becoming, and how can I love you well now?When someone's answer is hard to hear, we talk about the one response that changes everything. Don't defend or explain. Simply say "tell me more." If you’re willing to ask brave questions, be prepared for brave answers. One piece of wisdom before you press play: don't ask all five at once. Pick one question, one person, and let it unfold over time, since getting to know each other isn't a one-time project, it's a lifelong rhythm. And as you go, ask the Holy Spirit to give you discernment for what to ask and when, and watch him do healing work in places you didn't even know needed it.Scripture Mentioned: John 14:9, Philippians 3:10, Matthew 13:1-23, 1 Corinthians 13:4-7, Proverbs 28:1 + Psalm 139:23-24Sowing a Hidden Seed: Marriage Edition is currently available as our thank you gift to Legacy Builders, Intentional’s monthly giving community. Learn more at intentionalparents.org/devotional.Intentional Motherhood Retreat: October 15-17, 2026 in Portland, ORIntentional Fatherhood Retreat: November 12-14, 2026 in Austin, TXSubmit Questions: Send a voice recording to [email protected], mentioning your name and where you’re from.Sowing a Hidden Seed: Parenting EditionJoin Our Legacy BuildersWatch on YouTubeFollow Us on Instagram: @intentional_parents @brookmosser@emosserFREE Bottom-Up vs. Top-Down Parenting PDFFREE Text Message Daily DevotionalRaising Passionate Jesus FollowersThe Intentional Film Series

This week, we open up about Sowing a Hidden Seed: Daily Prayers for Your Marriage to Heal, Grow and Flourish, our new prayer devotional for marriage, and the honest, sometimes hard road that led us to write it. This isn't a book born from a picture-perfect marriage. It came from a real one: two people who have had to learn, over and over, that marriage is worth the fight even when it's hard.We walk through the heart of the devotional and where it came from, including a reflection from the Sermon on the Mount on what it looks like to be blessed and flourishing, even in the middle of struggle. We talk honestly about how neither of us can thrive in marriage on our own strength. We need the power of the Holy Spirit. We also share how the writing process itself became a lesson in marriage: two people learning, again, what it means to become one.From there, we read from two of our favorite (and hardest won) days in the devotional: “Speaking Life” and “Tenderness,” days that speak directly to areas we've each had to grow in. We talk about the practice of praying borrowed prayers when you don't have your own words yet. And ultimately, we emphasize the comforting reality that if you and your spouse aren't currently praying together, that's okay. Give yourself permission to start where you are. It will feel awkward at first, and it gets easier as you build a joint practice of prayer.If you're not praying together as a couple, let this be your invitation to start, one small, imperfect prayer at a time.Sowing a Hidden Seed: Marriage Edition is currently available as our thank you gift to Legacy Builders, Intentional’s monthly giving community. Learn more at intentionalparents.org/devotional.Scripture Mentioned: Matthew 5:1-12Intentional Motherhood Retreat: October 15-17, 2026 in Portland, ORIntentional Fatherhood Retreat: November 12-14, 2026 in Austin, TXSubmit Questions: Send a voice recording to [email protected], mentioning your name and where you’re from.Sowing a Hidden Seed: Parenting EditionJoin Our Legacy BuildersWatch on YouTubeFollow Us on Instagram: @intentional_parents @brookmosser@emosserFREE Bottom-Up vs. Top-Down Parenting PDFFREE Text Message Daily DevotionalRaising Passionate Jesus FollowersThe Intentional Film Series

This week, Brook and Elizabeth answer your real questions on marriage, ministry life, and parenting without a blueprint. First, we tackle supporting a spouse through mental health challenges and healing work, while avoiding enabling and codependency. This often requires doing your own work, not hiding behind theirs. It's easy to excuse yourself because your spouse "has more to heal from," but compassion and personal growth have to go together.Next, we dive into staying yourself while honoring a spouse who values structure more than you do, starting with remembering your differences aren't a problem to fix. Sameness was never the goal. It's worth knowing which hills are actually worth dying on.From there, we talk about the myth of true balance between parenting and ministry. Some seasons ask more of your work, some ask more of your family, and they rarely line up neatly. What matters is stepping back to check the ratio over the long haul, so one area isn't quietly draining another.We also get into parenting without a healthy example growing up, and why it takes real intention. You need models, whether that's books, podcasts, or watching other families closely, because even a good childhood didn't prepare anyone for parenting in today's world. The real turning point is recognizing a pattern isn't working before you can choose something different.Finally, we land on what to do when you're too exhausted or brain dead to spend time with the Lord. We talk about how He isn't guilting you into showing up. He sees your exhaustion and still wants to connect inside of it, which is why ritual matters so much, so you do it regardless of how you feel that day. He's not asking you to try harder, just to come as you are.If any of this sounds familiar, we hope it's a reminder that you're not walking through any of this alone.Scripture Mentioned: James 1:2-5 + John 5:39-40Book Mentioned: Domestic Monastery by Ronald RolheiserPrevious Episode Mentioned: You're Not Broken: Finding Freedom and Clarity Through an Adult ADHD Diagnosis (YouTube, Spotify + Apple Podcasts)INTRODUCING… Sowing a Hidden Seed: Marriage Edition, a 31-day prayer devotional for marriage, available as our thank you gift to Legacy Builders, Intentional’s monthly giving community.Intentional Motherhood Retreat: October 15-17, 2026 in Portland, ORIntentional Fatherhood Retreat: November 12-14, 2026 in Austin, TXSubmit Questions: Send a voice recording to [email protected], mentioning your name and where you’re from.Sowing a Hidden Seed: Parenting EditionJoin Our Legacy BuildersWatch on YouTubeFollow Us on Instagram: @intentional_parents @brookmosser@emosserFREE Bottom-Up vs. Top-Down Parenting PDFFREE Text Message Daily DevotionalRaising Passionate Jesus FollowersThe Intentional Film Series

Are you disappointed? In your marriage, your kids, your job, your friendships, even your relationship with Jesus? Maybe there's a quiet voice saying "it could be better," and you're not sure what to do with that.This week, we sit with disappointment: what it actually is, what Scripture says about it, and how it can become a place of growth instead of just a place of hurt. We share honestly from our own lives, including the disappointment we've walked through around physical pain and suffering, and the very human instinct to protect ourselves from ever being let down again. Choosing to hope is a risk. It means choosing to be disappointed too, and we talk about what it looks like to take that risk anyway, and to ask a better question than "why did this happen": what will bring God glory in this?We look at what disappointment brings to the surface: hidden expectations, unhealthy attachments, the places where we've been grasping for control, and false assumptions about God and about other people. Scripture never treats disappointment as a failure of faith. It gives us lament instead of denial, a way to bring our full, honest selves to God rather than around Him.We also draw from the Desert Mothers and Fathers, who saw disappointment as part of spiritual formation itself, and from Elisabeth Elliot's reminder that the secret was never a different set of circumstances, but Christ in her. That's the destination we're aiming for: not the removal of disappointment, but a deeper trust inside of it.Four practical ways to move through disappointment:Name itExamine the expectation beneath itFeel it without numbing itSurrender what you cannot controlScripture Mentioned: Psalm 13:1, Psalm 22:1, Proverbs 13:12, Luke 22:39-44, 1 Samuel 1 and 2 + Psalm 6:6INTRODUCING… Sowing a Hidden Seed: Marriage Edition, a 31-day prayer devotional for marriage, available as our thank you gift to Legacy Builders, Intentional’s monthly giving community.Intentional Motherhood Retreat: October 15-17, 2026 in Portland, ORIntentional Fatherhood Retreat: November 12-14, 2026 in Austin, TXSubmit Questions: Send a voice recording to [email protected], mentioning your name and where you’re from.Sowing a Hidden Seed: Parenting EditionJoin Our Legacy BuildersWatch on YouTubeFollow Us on Instagram: @intentional_parents @brookmosser@emosserFREE Bottom-Up vs. Top-Down Parenting PDFFREE Text Message Daily DevotionalRaising Passionate Jesus FollowersThe Intentional Film Series